### Act 1, Scene 2: Oh Dear

- Backdrop: red, white and blue ribbons, O. Deere logo in the middle, podium below the logo
- Props: garden equipment, mops, voucher, dollar bills
- Special FX: clip-on hypno-eyes, zombie faces
- Puppets: Lori, Audience (Zombies), Salesman, Monty, Janitor 1, Janitor 2
- Setting: The audience sits with their backs towards the stage, watches the Salesman on the podium, talking about garden equipment in a mesmerizing manner
- Music: Pink Floyd - Money / Rammstein - Feuer Frei

##### RADIO INTRO

lights out

radio jingle

Jeff: "Hey Eddie! Did you know that tomorrow is going to be a special day for Las Vegas?"

Eddie: "No Jeff, what is it?"

Jeff: "Tomorrow, the world-famous Stardust hotel and casino is going to close its doors forever!"

Eddie: "Really? They're going to close the Stardust?"

Jeff: "Yes, rather sad, isn't it?"

Eddie: "Absolutely! The Stardust has been there for as long as I can remember."

Jeff: "Yes, since 1958 to be precise."

Eddie: "Uh, am I that old already?"

Jeff (laughs): "Oh, I'm not going to comment on this in front of an open mike! But ... here is a little history lesson for you. The Stardust has been the first casino built for the general public. The original resort was conceived and built by Tony Cornero, who bought the land from the Paiute Indians. Sadly, the man died in 1955 before the construction was completed. When the hotel opened, it had the largest casino in Nevada, the largest swimming pool in Nevada and the largest hotel in the Las Vegas area."

Eddie: "Wow! So, why are they going to tear it down then?"

Jeff: "Come on, this is Las Vegas! Because they want to build an even bigger one! The new hotel will be called "Echelon Place", and they're planning to start building early next year."

Eddie: "Oh, what a pity! You know, they had this little club in the basement, called the Unlucky Thirteen! I've been told it's pretty cool, but I never got around to actually go there."

Jeff: "Well Eddie, and it seems you never will ..."

Eddie: "Yeah, talk about taking chances when they arise ... oh well. So what are they going to do with all the stuff that's inside the casino ... will it all be scrapped?"

Jeff: "Actually Eddie, they are going to have a huge auction! From coasters to bed frames, everything must go! So if you want to buy something with the Stardust logo on it, it's time to get in line. Everyone can sign up."

Eddie: "I don't know, I find it rather sad to see a piece of history be sold out like this."

Jeff: "Well Eddie, this is Las Vegas ... nobody cares about history. In Las Vegas, everything is about one thing. Money. And nothing but the money."

Pink Floyd - Money

##### MAIN DIALOGUE

curtains open

main stage light on

AMB-0201 - Slight Audience Mumbling and Yawning

Salesman: "Ladies and Gentlemen, now we are looking at the final product of this show. Please behold: the Shred Master 5000 XXXL! What ever you throw into its hungry gaping maw will relentlessly be ripped into unrecognizable shreds by 400 deathly blades made of 50 times tempered steel! MUAHAHA!"

Audience cheers

SND-0201 - Audience Cheers 1

Lori whimpers

Salesman: "This machine marks the pinnacle of American engineering! There is no limit to what this beast can shred! Bushes, trees, houses, you name it! In a recent laboratory experiment, researchers were even able to shred an entire city!"

Audience cheers

SND-0202 - Audience Cheers 2

Lori turns slowly, big hypno-eyes on her face

Lori (shivering): "Must ... Stay ... Awake ... Need ... Voucher! Must .. Not ... Sleep!"

SND-0203 - Audience Cheers 3 (increases while salesmen talks)

Salesman: "Have you ever felt the urge to destroy, to annihilate, to demolish, to shred? Then the Shred Master 5000 XXXL is just what you need! Unleash 4600 Megawatts of deadly shredding power at the push of a single button! If this does not impress your neighbor, shred him! Yes, I know you want it, I know you need it! You must buy this product!"

Audience cheers and throws dollar bills

Lori: "But ... but ... I don't want to buy anything! I just need the voucher! The voucher!"

dark light, blue, ghostly mood

Salesman (ghost voice): "You must buy this! You must buy this!"

AMB-0201 - (STOP)
AMB-0202 - Ghost Ambience
SND-0204 - Shift into Dream

Lori: "No! No no no! The voucher! Just give me the voucher!"

The audience turns to the stage, zombie faces show, green glowing eyes

SND-0205 - Zombie Noises

Audience: "Must buy! Must buy this!"

Lori screams and runs off to Section A, off stage

Audience follow her to Section A, still chanting

Audience: "Must buy this! You must buy!"

Lori runs past the Audience to Section B, off stage

Audience follow her to Section B until off stage, still chanting

Audience: "You must buy this! Must buy!"

Salesman changes into Monty

Lori (screams): "NO! NO! Leave me alone!"

SND-0206 - Monty (calls her softly): "Lori! Thirteen is not an unlucky number! Listen to me! Thirteen is not an unlucky number! Lori! Find the unlucky thirteen! And remember! Thirteen is not an unlucky number!"

Lori (scream): "Help me! Help me!"

SND-0207 - Monty (calling): "No, Lori! You must help me!"

Lori runs back from Section B to Section A, off stage

Lori keeps screaming and calling for help

Audience follow Lori from Section B to Section A, off stage

Lori runs from Section A to Section B, off stage

Lori (screams): "What the hell are you talking about? Help!"

Audience follow Lori from Section A to Section B, off stage

Lori runs from Section B to Section A

Garden tools appear in Section B, following Lori to Section A, off stage

Lori (screams): "Help! Help! Help!"

SND-0208 - Garden Tools Chase 1

SND-0209 - Monty (calling): "No, you must help me! Help me!"

Monty disappears slowly downwards

Lori runs from Section A to the middle of the stage

Garden tools re-enter from Section A following Lori to the middle of the stage

Audience enter from Section B following Lori to the middle of the stage

SND-0210 - Garden Tools & Zombies

Lori stands in the middle, looking back and forth

Lori (screams): "Oh no! Help! Help!"

Lori looks at the Audience

Audience (chanting): "You must buy this! Buy this!"

Lori screams and turns around to the garden tools

SND-0211 - Zombie Tool Attack (chainsaw, lawn mower, cutters)

Lori screams

Audience and garden tools roar, run at each other

Lori dives down

Audience and garden tools start a shredding match

lots of fur and cloth fly up in the air, then they disappear

Lori reappears, lots of shredded pieces on her, shivering violently

Mop 1 rises in Section A, not moving.

SND-0212 - Splurt Left (appear)

Lori screams and runs away to Section B

Mop 2 rises in Section B, not moving.

SND-0213 - Splurt right (appear)

Lori screams and runs back to the middle, caught in between

The Mops close in, moving alternatingly (mop1, mop2, mop1, mop2)

SND-0214 - slurp, slurp (move)

Mops start to bump into Lori

SND-0215 (repeatedly) - squish (bump)

Lori lets out a long, high pitched scream

mood change back to normal

SND-0216 - Dream Shift Reverse
AMB-0202 - (STOP)

Janitor 1 and Janitor 2 appear, carrying the mops, trying to wipe the floor

Janitor 1: "Hey Ma'am! Wake up! WAKE UP!"

Lori (screams): "What ... What happened? Where is everybody? And who are you?"

Janitor 1: "The show is over, everyone's gone home! And so should you!"

Janitor 2: "Yeah! Excuse me, Ma'am, but we need to clean up, could you please get out of the way?"

Lori: "Oh ... I must have fallen asleep. I'm sorry. I'll be gone in a minute, I just need to ..."

Lori gasps

Lori: "The voucher! I need the voucher! Give me the voucher!"

Lori jumps at Janitor 1, shaking him

Lori: "Give me the voucher!"

Janitor 2: "Whoa! I've rarely seen anyone so shaken up after the show ... she must have been sitting through all three sessions in a row!"

Janitor 1: "Calm down, Ma'am. Don't worry, you'll get your voucher. Just pick it up on your way out!"

Lori: "Oh .. thank you! Bye bye Mr Cleaning man! I'm on my way ... I'll be gone in a second ... don't worry ... just stay there until I'm gone ... au revoir ... good bye .. auf wiedersehen ..."

Lori runs off to B

Janitor 1 pulls out a blue plastic bag with trash

Janitor 1: "So, what are we going to do with all this trash?"

Janitor 2: "Mh ... I think I have an idea!"

Janitor 1: "Oh yeah? What is it?"

(Scanner) one light left, one light right of the Pawpetstage. Color=red, No Movement, Tribal Gobo, Gobo rotates

Janitor 2 (creepy voice): "Let's take the trash ... AND SHRED IT!!!!"

Janitor 1+2 (mad): "Yeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaah!"

SND-0217 - Shredding

The Janitors start laughing maniacally

SND-0217 - Rammstein - Feuer Frei

lights out

curtain closes