College Days

College Days
Title: College Days
Status: Complete
Characters: Fang, Naomi
Rating: SFW
Classification: One Shot
Author: Skogsraon
Summary: Naomi and Fang have become roommates, sharing their joys and sorrows while working through the everyday challenges of College and long-distance relationships.
Naomi can't really hear everything being said out in the kitchen; muffled by the door and the music Fang put on to gain some privacy in the poorly soundproofed cheap student dorm that they shared. Then she hears Fang slamming the phone down hard on the receiver, lifting it up then slamming it down again, cursing to herself as they do it one more time - this is the second time this week they'd talked to each other. A loud slam echoes through the apartment, she probably kicked the poor cupboard again to take out their frustration. She'd need to remember to reinforce that corner or they'd both have to pay for having it fixed.
Should she say anything? It’s been going on for too long now. There had been some conflict between Naser and her, but their break was going well - compared to Anon and Fang's.
Theirs was going a lot better. Hers and Naser’s. The two of them were meant for each other; there had always been an 'us'.
Naser was just so very far away and the two of them hadn't really spoken heart to heart for a month now. He said he needed 'some space', whatever that meant. He was probably off banging some college chicks and she was fuming just from pondering it. But he had promised that he'd be faithful - and he was hers after all.
Fang however needs to shape up, they couldn't just keep acting like this while skirting around the issue; she'd need to push a change sooner rather than later! This was affecting both of their lives, after all. She couldn't study if this kept happening and taking up all of her free time.
Anon can go to hell if that is the way he's going to act toward them.
Suddenly, Fang comes storming out from the kitchen. They seem to have calmed down a little but their brow is furrowed and their wings half outspread in agitation. She shoots the question, careful so as to not escalate their sudden outburst:
"How's Anon doing?"
"That FUCKING asshole keeps dodging me, he can't come over, he can't talk for long, he doesn't want to spend spring break here - what the FUCK are we trying to be, then? WHY does he not want me!"
Fang's digging their nails into their palms as their wings fly open completely. Shrieking out their frustration, they throws themself on their bed, landing with their head on their pillow with a pomf and instantly muffling their shouting.
This would become a problem. A very big problem. It had already been a big problem but this time it was way worse than it had been the last couple of times.
But she knew better than to keep digging into troubles that weren't hers - last time she'd got burnt badly. Pushing Anon had been a bad idea in hindsight, even if it would have worked well shouldn't she have been exposed in front of Naser of all people. That was the wedge that started to really drive them apart.
She had enough work trying to keep herself together without Naser, all their original plans for their future falling apart; they'd gone to different universities and were living different lives. It was what it was, but they'd reconvene after this and resume their future together.
She eventually had to confront Fang though, BEFORE they screamed a hole into the pillow.
Sighing, she started moving toward the bed. Fang's wings were still flapping and blowing away the papers that were littered around the room - the ones she'd put so carefully into place to be able to study as efficiently as possible by matching them together. Taking a deep breath so as to not give them a screaming lecture, she took the last step before sitting down close to Fang's head so as to not accidentally get slapped by their wings - she'd made that mistake before:
"Hey, I'm here.", putting her hand on Fang's head and stroking their hair.
Fang kept screaming but their voice was starting to give out with only their flapping wings still taking out their anger at Anon. Stroking their hair seems to have the usual calming effect, with Fang's freakout turning into sobbing. How great; the sobbing is the worst follow-up - it meant that they were going to stay up all night crying and looking at pictures. It meant the lamp would be on - and she needed her sleep.
Fang's emotions were an annoying black box that she'd never understand completely, but at least they usually reacted to the same stimuli in the same way.
After a few more minutes of stroking their head and hushing, Fang's wings fold back down against their back again. They weren't crying right now though, to her surprise, Fang was smiling as they turned their head to face her:
"Hey, Naomi?"
"Yeah?"
"Don't fall in love - and don't try to make it work from a distance."
The sudden advice had surprised her, was this Fang giving her advice, in Fang's most vulnerable moment? How dare they? Fang continues nonetheless:
"I know you and Naser... You try. But I've seen you, the look in your eyes and the way you stare at the phone after you text with no response or leave a voicemail.", Fang smiled back up at her with their mascara running down their cheeks.
"Fang, what is this about?", she said as she suddenly was feeling very unstable in her position in helping Fang. Maybe it was best to call it a night, let them sleep it out. Take the rest in the morning. Yes, the morning, when they were both well rested.
"It's about how you need to find your own way through life. Anon is... Special. Naser is unique in his own ways, but he has a tendency to ignore his issues. That's why he's not answering you."
So now Fang was calling her an issue? FANG?! THE GIRL THAT DIDN'T EVEN KNOW WHAT SHE HERSELF WAS, ATTACHED TO A SKINNIE?
Naser was hers and no one else's. She'd fight for him with tooth and nail, forever if need be. Fang interrupts her inner monologue:
"You know I'm right, and I know it frustrates you."
"I am NOT frustrated, and you're NOT right. I and Naser love each other!"
"You do. But sometimes, that isn't enough.", their slight smile turning into a frown as tears start pooling up in their eyes, "Sometimes you just need to play it by ear."
"You and your music jokes."
"It wasn't a joke.", their speech taking on a more serious tone, "You need to live for yourself and not be attached by the hip to Naser. He isn't here, but you are. You need to be you; you need to be Naomi. Naomi without Naser."
What a preposterous idea, that Fang could even imply such a thing? Clearly, their talk with Anon had struck some kind of nerve and caused a breakdown in them.
But she felt something stir in her gut. There was a grain of truth embedded in their words. They kept on:
"You study so hard just to go back to him as a top student with great grades and good friends and a loving aura.", putting her hand in theirs, "But that won't happen. Naser he... He isn't like that."
"W-what do you mean?"
"Naser won't be there, he won't be the same. He moves on, he lives his own life by his own rules; if anything is obstructing him he takes the long path around."
"Stop lying, you know this is between you and Anon!"
"It's between us both! We're both in this mess together!"
"I am NOT like you! You're just a confused girl scared to face reality! You haven't been able to deal with it ever since you got into that non-binary shit and isolated yourself from everyone!"
The words hit Fang like a ton of bricks and she instantly regretted it. She had to salvage this:
"Please, I didn't mean to-"
"I know", their head sinking into their chest while slouching their previously agitated wings and draping them around themself for comfort.
"I'm sorry.", she leans over and hugs them tight, "You're a good friend and I appreciate your advice; it stems from good intentions."
"We girls gotta stick together, don't we?"
She's confused by the suddenly gendered expression, but Fang notices and elaborates:
"It's just an expression, dork. But do think about what I told you, you can't just wait around forever. Best case, you and Naser can get into communicating better so it isn't hopeless.", stretching out their arms and wings, enveloping her in a soft, warm, and feathery hug.
There's comfort in the embrace, it hurts to think about Naser. Plus, she had been watching her phone this entire evening to see if he would call her back. Eventually, they fall asleep while huddled up against each other, Fang shedding a tear or two and letting loose the lone heart-wrenching sob before returning to their normal neutral expression. They were pushing it back inside themself.
She was kept up, worried for them. They'd said those things to her with good intentions; there was no need for her to be so hostile right now, she'd already tried to push Fang away multiple times, and look what that had gotten her - absolutely nothing, nothing at all.
They soon snooze together, wrapped up in a ball while holding each other tight.
When the morning comes it seems that Fang has collected themselves a bit. They even smiled as the two of them shared a still moment during breakfast, talking about their plans for the day and their lectures - sharing notes and talking about the coming subjects. Fang was still better on the visualization parts, but on the theoretical plane, she was an uncrowned champion.
The day’s classes passed by without a hitch but also without as much as a peep from Naser - she’d even kept her phone on vibrate should he call. After finishing the last class she grabbed her bag and headed off to work.
It was comforting to drop everything, even Naser, and just focus on working the counter for a while, greeting people and aiding with the rare questions or requests, even taking down orders from time to time. The shift passed by quickly and thankfully the owner was kind enough to let her go a little earlier since he knew she'd have classes in the morning. Usually, she didn't bother explaining her studies to her boss, but she felt like unloading a little bit on someone else - she had been carrying all this weight alone for a long time now. Maybe she could trust the boss, and Fang, after all.
Getting home early is nice, the evening shift was always rough if she had early courses in the morning so getting an extra hour of preparing for tomorrow's seminar would help her get more out of it; saving time when studying by herself later. Maybe she could get used to it.
Approaching the room she heard voices coming from inside; she swore to herself hoping that Fang hadn't brought over friends to have an afterparty when she'd REALLY needed this hour to be quiet so she could focus. Then she realized that it was only Fang's voice echoing through the room, they must be on the phone. She puts an ear to the door, pondering on whether or not she should interrupt anything. They seemed upset.
"-on, I can't... I can't do this anymore. I think we... Yeah.", a pause as Fang seems to listen to whatever Anon is replying with, "I know. I know. It's... There's this summer, and we could..."
Silence, heavy breathing, wing flaps. Fang resumes after a short break:
"Oh, you can't come then? You've got... Oh? Okay.", she could hear Fang's wings flapping anxiously, "How about... No? Okay. Okay."
Pause. She could hear them breathing heavily, the way they usually worked through the heavy emotional flips. This was NOT good for Fang. Something bad had happened. Was her mother sick? Had her dad got shot?
"Then, Anon... I hope... Yeah.", another pause and a deep breath to steady themselves, "I think we... We should break up. We can't make this work, we both... Yeah. I'm sorry. I love you. I'm sorry. I'm so very, very sorry. I love you."
Ah, same old Anon. She knew something was up with him, ever since she first met him he'd been an egocentric recluse. Fang's broken voice whispers out a final message and she really had to focus to hear it:
"We will sort everything out later, for now... I need some time. Alone. We can’t keep this up. Please, so let us... Yeah. Mhmm. Take care, babe. Sorry. We’ll talk later. I need some time alone for now. I love you."
There was no slamming of the phone; no shouting, no kicking of the cupboard.
Instead, sobbing and ugly crying were coming from inside the kitchen, since Fang expected to be alone there was no music muffling their conversation. There was no filter keeping Fang from holding back. A soft 'thump' echoed out and she guessed that they flopped over onto the kitchen wall, before a fluffy sliding sound confirmed her earlier guess by indicating that they had slid down the wall and balled up on the floor.
What could she do, at this point?
She could do her best, it was what Fang would do for her.
They needed her now. This was no point to dally.
She knocks, coming inside through the unlocked door hearing their crying more clearly now. She kicks off her shoes and drops her bag before carefully peeking her head in through the doorway to the kitchen; as she had guessed, Fang was lying on the floor all balled up with their wings curled around them, clutching their phone tightly in their hands, staring at the lock screen of Anon’s expressionless face.
There was no need for words, they both shared this pain. Fang was just ahead of the curve. They both felt the shifting of the times and how the paths of their lives were becoming even more convoluted than they had been just a week ago. Things had been so good for so long - or maybe that was just what she kept telling herself to keep from falling apart.
She sits down, leaning into a hug, Fang's tears streaming down their face as they sob loudly and wrap their wings around her before pulling her closer. Incoherent mumbling is all that Fang can muster, so Naomi just hushes her while rocking them both back and forth gently.
Fang had lost Anon, and she... She was... Things were… Complicated.
She felt the tears come welling up in her eyes too, Fang grabbing her tighter as they saw as her sudden realization struck her like a ballistic missile of emotions.
They both sat crying on the floor for what felt like hours; two hearts united in shared sorrow.