# Bad Apple Chapter 3

Chapter 3: Can't Break Free
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The past three days passed by rather quickly, not surprising in the slightest I had lost all sense of time a while ago.
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Trying to ignore that massive headache that makes my skull feels like it’s shrinking as it crushes my brain, I’ve just been staring at the wall for the past couple of minutes. Gazing upon its yellow-stained brilliance.
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Although I can’t say these past three days have been any more productive or eventful. A typical Rock Ring session here, trolling some Kenyan Gum enthusiast forums there. Not to how to mention my attempts of finding a new Adderall hookup haven’t been exactly successful. It turns out that bitchy cashier at my usual spot notified the manager and told all the other pharmacies in the area not to serve me. Just my fucking luck.
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So for the past couple of days, I’ve had to rely solely on shitty dollar store coffee to keep me awake. Even then, it hasn’t exactly helped. I passed out at 2 AM in my desk chair watching a Saturnia marathon.
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The dreams I had last night were… Let’s just leave it at that.
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Despite all the hell I’ve been through the past couple of months, my mood has improved slightly over the past few days since my reunion with Rosa and Stella. Never was I expecting to ever run into them again, nor would I expect they would want anything to do with me.
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I was so convinced that they would just abandon me once Rosa drove me home after having me stay the night, but they’ve been chatting with me every day, both of them.
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Rosa and I have mainly been talking about what’s been happening at Volcano High since the shooting.
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Apparently, Principal Spears resigned about two weeks after the incident, along with Mr. Fernsworth and Mr. Tsuki. That can’t have been easy on their conscience, knowing the students under your care died, the pupils that you guided through the daily slog, gone forever.
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However, she seemed to dominate most of the conversation during our text messages, frequently inquiring about my wellbeing after I accidentally confessed to being a schizo.
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“Have they been bothering you today An-on? And how has your sleep been?”
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Part of me feels like I’m talking with my mother than my friend, although Rosa’s done more for me in the past week than my parents have the last six months.
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Surprisingly enough, my conversations with Stella over text have been far more engaging.
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The girl I met last Sunday who ran away at the sight of me, or broke down in a panic due my freakout, was nowhere to be found during those texts.
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Stella was a lot more outgoing, asking about any anime I’ve been checking out while telling me all the new shows she’s seen. Surprisingly her taste has improved, if only slightly..
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It turns out she even plays video games too, I guess anime and tarot readings can get boring after a while too. Although that’s where our tastes seem to diverge, she plays typical weeb trash like God Collision, Last Wish 14 Online, and of course fucking Parasaurna. Although I can’t say, I’m surprised honestly.
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Additionally, she told me that she’s been trying to become a better artist by practicing her free time. She even sent me some photos of her art; knowing her I was expecting some basic fujo-shit, but the images I got were actually pretty well done. It just really goes to show me how little I really knew about Stella until now, how little I knew about either of them
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They all seem to be the same general kind of idea, close-ups of anime characters, some were surrounded by flowers, one of them obscured by bathing in the stars. However, the one that stood out to me was her drawing of a particularly long-haired white-haired human woman clutching her chest in a sea of stars, her eyes closed shut, tears staining her cheeks, and yet the expression painted across her face showed peace rather than sadness…
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While I’m not gonna pretend that I know the first thing about art, I can tell she poured a lot of herself into these drawings.
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Despair.
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Sorrow.
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Fear.
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And yet… Hope.
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While her art is clearly influenced by the anime she watches paired with the typical occultist art found on tarot cards, many of her drawings seem to be driven by her own emotions, the trauma she endured.
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Although nothing is confirmed, Stella didn’t explain the meanings of these pieces when she sent them to me, she only asked for feedback and seeing how sensitive she has been when I saw her a couple of days ago, I didn’t feel comfortable asking.
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Maybe I’ll ask her today, Rosa did say she wanted to take us out to dinner today. It was originally going to be lunch but I guess something came during the gardening club meetup so we had to delay it a little bit.
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But still… It’s nice to see them again, for the longest time I was prepared to spend my life as a hermit, but since those two come back into my life, I’ve felt something inside me that I haven’t felt in a long time.
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I felt alive…
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*KNOCK* *KNOCK* *KNOCK*
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Whatthefuck
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The sudden rhythmic banging emerging from the door causes me to jump slightly, thankfully I’m on my bed. I probably would’ve bumped against my desk if I was at my chair, and I don’t want a repeat of the ‘cigarette incident’, My leg’s practically being held together by a shitload of gauze bandage, so I REALLY need to be careful.
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Shuffling myself out of the worn mattress and taking hold of my crutches, I wobble myself over to the front door. For the first time in a while, I did a little bit of cleaning, my apartment still looks like shit but at least I won’t be tripping on all the garbage anymore, most of the mess is now regulated to my dresser and countertop.
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Quietly leaning against the door, I clutch the knife in my pocket as I take a peek through the peephole.
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I can only make out a blur of white obscuring the rundown hallway, glancing closely I can make out... Feathers?
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No no no no… Is this real? Is she in my head? How is she able to knock on the door? Is it her parents, didn’t her mother have white feathers too? If Trish was able to find me then they would be able to as well. Fuck…
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“Vamos... ¿Qué estás haciendo ahí?”
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Wait… Rosa?
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I rub my eyes with my free hand instinctually and gaze back into the peephole to see a rather expectant-looking Ankylosaurus, who appears to be holding something behind her back.
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“An-on? Are you home?” Rosa calls out through the door.
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Wait… How the hell did she even find out my room number? She’s only ever dropped me off in front of the entrance?
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Taking my weight off the door, I unlock the door and manage to open it with my free hand, leaning my back against the door for support, I finally greet my reunited friend.
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“Hola An-on, it is good to see you again!” Her face quickly lights up with a smile. “Ready to get some dinner?”
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Wait that was today?
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…
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Fuck me, I’ve really have lost all sense of time. But who am I to say no to a meal.
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“Ready as I’ll ever be.” I quip, eliciting a chuckle from Rosa!
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“Wonderful! But before we go, I have something for you!” She cheerfully explains as she moves her arm, revealing a leg brace in her arm.
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“Mi Madre was able to get you a new leg brace, to replace the one that was broken!”
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For me? I… I don’t know what to say.
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She lets out a chuckle with a smile. “You can thank me by coming with us for a good time!”
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I can’t help but feel a smile form on my own lips as well, the movement has become so foreign over the past few months that I’ve forgotten what it feels like.
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Nobody has been this kind to me in a long time.
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“T-thank you Rosa, this really means a lot to me.”
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I’m about to say more but it occurs to me that something is missing, where is Stella?
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“Oh! Stella’s just over by the entrance to the stairs waiting for us!” Rosa replies to my mumbling, before motioning down the hallway.
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Wait, why didn’t she come with Rosa? It’s not like we haven’t been talking the past couple of days.
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“You’re mumbling again An-on.” She reminds me while walking at a slow pace so my crippled ass doesn’t get left behind. “No te preocupes, she’s happy to see her, you know how she is right now.”
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“Yeah… That’s true.” I agree.
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I suppose that makes sense, given her shy nature, it makes sense that’d she would have an easier time conversing over text rather than in person, especially with everything that’s happened to her.
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As we approach the elevators, my eyes begin to spot a certain lime-colored stego on the ground, currently engrossed by her phone with her headphones plugged in, not paying mind to her two companions approaching her side.
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She actually seems rather calm, you know for someone by herself in the city’s shittiest apartment complex
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“Stella?” My words echo through the hall as the preoccupied Stella ignores my words as she continues to watch whatever’s on her phone.
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Rosa quite literally takes a step further and kneels down, placing her hand on Stella’s shoulder.
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“Stella, it’s-”
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‘AAaaah!” Stella cried out and she recoiled from Rosa almost instinctually and remained seated on the ground hyperventilating, her reaction almost causing me to land on my own ass, it’s hard enough keeping balance on crutches.
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“Hey hey hey, Está bien!” Rosa backs up while attempting to comfort Stella in a soothing voice. “Look An-on’s here, now we’re ready to go!”
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Stella’s breathing slowed down and she looked past Rosa. The distressed expression painted across her face quickly warmed up as soon as she recognized me.
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“H-hey Anon, it’s good to see you again…”
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“Uh, you too Stella..”
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Come on… There’s more than I say than just that. Think Anon, think.
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“So uhh… How’s that Viking anime you were telling me about the other day?” I rather pathetically answer.
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I can feel her tension ease at that question and she lifts herself off the ground, and the slight smile on her face becomes more apparent.
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“Oh I finished it already, it was such a good show, you should watch it!” Stella beams with her answer, probably the most enthusiastic I’ve seen her yet.
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“Okay niños, we should probably get going and continue this conversation in the car, ¿sí?” Rosa interjects, clearly eager to get to the restaurant.
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I wonder where she had in mind anyway?
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About fifteen minutes passed since we left Skin Row, the drive felt…nice.
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The rhythm stayed the same as the past two times with Rosa in the driver seat, Stella in the passenger seat, and I have the backseat all to myself. Granted, I always preferred the backseat, especially when I went on long drives with my parents when I was younger. However, back then I didn’t have to awkwardly position my mangled leg to avoid hurting it.
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I take notice of said leg, now equipped with a leg brace where it was broken. It definitely makes it more comfortable and manageable, trying to move around with a broken leg and no way to hold it in place was difficult, to say the least.
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However, the lively conversations I had with Rosa and Stella helped me forget the pain I was in, in more ways than one.
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Learning about what these two have been up to since graduating was actually quite refreshing to hear. Stella was telling us how she started a new art piece she was working on after being inspired by some anime (of course). Rosa was telling me about Spear’s replacement, and most likely the source of a lot of her stress
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“Mierda, I tell you Principal Roberts is going to be the death of me! It’s always something isn’t good enough, meetings should be handled this way! You can’t make that change!” The ankylosaur let out an exhausted sigh. “I miss Principal Spears, he may have been strict. But at least he was fair.”
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Damn… This new principal sounds like a real hardass, Spears may have been an exception to the rule, but if you aren’t a tyrannical dickbag, are you even a school principal?
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From the passenger seat’s window, Stella gazes at our surroundings before turning to the driver. “Uh Rosa, where did you say we were going to eat again?”
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I was curious about that myself, where did she want to take us? I don’t recall her saying anything other than the fact that she wanted to take us out to dinner.
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“Oh, it is this lovely little Italian place over in Little Trodon!”
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My heart sinks ever so slightly with those words, she doesn’t mean?
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“Remember that concert we went to last year?”
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No…
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Fuck… Out of all of the places we could have gotten dinner at, why does it have to be that place?
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“Oh… nice!” Stella replies to Rosa with feigned enthusiasm, it isn’t hard to tell that she isn’t the most enthusiastic about that either.
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As Rosa’s car approaches our destination, the large neon sign begins to reflect the color across the windshield
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Dino Moe’s
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Rosa put the car in park surprisingly far away from the building, a quick glance in front of us shows that most of the nearby parking spots has already been occupied by different cars.
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“Ay, it’s really busy tonight huh?” Rosa sighs as she twists the keys in the car’s ignition, cutting off its power. “Hopefully the wait to get in isn’t too long!”
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“Yeah… No kidding.” I reply with a hint of nonchalance, trying to hide the guilt and shame bubbling inside me.
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“Y-ye–yeah, it…”
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My attention is directed towards the stammering stego in the driver’s seat, visibly uncomfortable, her eyes pointed at the dashboard.
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“I..I….”
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Rosa takes note of this and places a hand on her shoulder. “Hey hey hey, it’s okay Stella. I’m sure it won’t be too bad in there, plus you got Anon and I, si?”
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“O..oui-yes… you’re right…”
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Wait… Why did she-
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“Do you need help with the car door An-on?” Rosa asks me, snapping me out of my own thoughts
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“Oh uh….”
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Fuck. That caught me off guard.
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“I should be okay!” I shrug as I attempt to open the door to my right and carefully move my non crippled leg out of the car and onto the ground, it’s awkward but I catch on.
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“Beuno! Let’s go have some dinner now, shall we?
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The three of us proceed to make our way to the entrance of Dino Moes. Rosa trying to match my slow pace, seemingly concerned about my ability to walk.
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Stella on the other hand has been walking more slowly than either of us, I turn my head to see her trailing behind, hood over her head and both her hands in her pocket. She’s clearly not looking forward to this for whatever reason.
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I can’t say that I blame her, an uneasy feeling of dread and regret grows larger the closer we get to the restaurant. That tight feeling gripping my chest like a vice as I drag my feet towards the building
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The restaurant was owned by Fang’s “uncle” who let us use the place as the band’s first venue.
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The restaurant where we had our first date, where I got to see the girl behind that angry mask.
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Only for me to fuck it all up and force that mask back on her.
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“An-on? Are you okay?”
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Rosa must have heard me mumbling, fuck how much did she hear?
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“Y-yeah I’m fine sorry, just thinking about some stuff I’m dealing with at home.” I try to deflect. However, Rosa doesn’t seem completely buy my answer.
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“Ok, but remember we’re always here for you if you need to talk!” She consoles me with a sympathetic glance.
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Crisis averted.
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The three of us finally make our way inside and enter the restaurant, and unsurprisingly it’s fairly busy today, there’s already a group of people in front of us, college students from the looks of it. Glancing around the establishment, I could probably count the number of tables that are empty on my hand.
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My eyes wander to the table where Fang and I sat, the table occupied by a disinterested family of four.
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The emotions hit me all at once like a flood.
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Regret, sorrow, longing.
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I’m too distracted by my own pity party to acknowledge the overwhelming scent of cheese and tomato sauce.
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….Okay I have to admit that actually smells pretty good, far better than the microwavable cardboard that passes for pizza that I’ve been partially living off of.
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“Hello, welcome to historic Dino-Moes, table for three tonight?" A human woman at the front desk greets us with a rather monotone voice. Surprised to see another human in this part of town.
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Rosa replies with a nod. “Si! Just us three!”
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“...Right this way…” The waitress lazily grabs a stack of menus and beckons us to follow her as we traverse the sea of tables, with Rosa taking the lead and Stella trailing behind me.
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I get glances from some of the patrons of the restaurant as I pass their tables, their expressions mainly ranging from curiosity and confusion.
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I mean I’m used to this shit by now, but it’s not like they’ve never seen a human anymore. After all, whos the one that got their table?
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The human woman directs us to a table in the center of the establish, facing my friends and I as she abruptly stops
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“This table okay with you guys?” The waitress asks as she drops the menus on the table.
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“Oh, uh…” I turn my head to see Stella struggling to speak up, Her hood still draped over her head, while avoiding eye contact with anyone.
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“Excellent, Gracias!” Rosa’s affirmation cuts off Stella’s protest, and we all take a seat at the table in front of us, although Stella does with obvious reluctance.
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Stella and I sit next to each other, with Rosa sitting across the table from us
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The waitress turns to leave but snaps back towards us, looking like she almost forgot the first rule of hospitality.
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“Oh! Uh… Can I get you all anything to drink?” She asks us, her tone a lot more alert than last time.
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“Oh, I’ll just have a lemonade, por favor!” Rosa chimes as she raises her hand, like a student in a classroom
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Funny, I always did see her as a lemonade type of girl.
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“And how about you?” The waitress asks me impatiently.
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“H-wuh.” I stammer out loud after briefly zoning out. “I’ll have a Stoka Cola please, no ice.”
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Thank god, I’m eager to have a caffeinated beverage that doesn’t taste like mold for once...
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“A-And can I have a strawberry milkshake please” Stella meekly asks our server, causing her to give the shy stego a rather sardonic look
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“Does this look like the type of place that would serve milkshakes?.”
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“O-oh…” The waitress’s response causing to Stego to shrink back in her seat.
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I get that working customer service must be painful, but does she REALLY need to be this much of a cunt? All she asked for was a milkshake.
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“It’s okay, it’s okay.” Rosa tries to reassure Stella before turning to our server. “Could we just get her something like a Strawberry soda? Surely you have those on the menu?”
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“Yeah… We might have something like that.” The waitress responds rather gruffly as she writes down our order and leaves without saying goodbye.
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10/10 service huh?
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“No kidding, she didn’t need to be that much of a puta.” Rosa replies to my mumbling with a furrowed brow, as she relaxes in her seat.
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“It’s okay guys… I’m fine with a strawberry soda…” Stella replied gingerly as she takes off her hood.
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The stego’s affirmation caused a soft smile to form on Rosa’s lips as she glanced our way. However, anything she said is drowned out by the voices throughout the restaurant.
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“I swear Mr. Jefferson needs to get the stick out of his ass, his deadlines make no sense!”
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“We’ll see Jessica, if we have time to stop on the way home, we can check it out.”
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“I think they gave me the herbivore sausage by mistake.”
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The surrounding voices drown out my own thoughts, almost to an overwhelming amount.
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“I mean I think she’s cute, but I’m just not even sure if it’s the right time to ask her out. You know?”
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“For the last time I don’t care about the new Claws of Duty game, literally all of them are the same!”
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“You never truly cared about me Anon, did you?”
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Wait, what?
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“What was I to you? A joke, a toy, another project to fix?”
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Wait… Where is she?
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I want to gaze around the room, but I find myself without the energy to do so.
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“Tell me, is the only reason you pretended to care about me-”
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Stop it.
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“-so you could get into my pants the last night we had together?”
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Please…
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“Before you killed me…”
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No…
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“AN-ON!”
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The nearby voice pulls me out of my stupor, and I see both Stella and Rosa looking at me expectantly,
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“Huh? Sorry, what did you guys say?” I ask the two.
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“Are you okay An-on?” Rosa asked with a degree of concern. “We asked, what would you like to order?”
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Oh right, dinner.
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Damn… I haven’t eaten that good in god knows how long. I’ve forgotten what the taste of an actual pizza tastes like. I’ve missed this rich cheezy heaven.
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Rosa sat across from me enjoying her chicken alfredo, well herbivore chicken alfredo, which sounds a hell of a lot less appetizing.
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Stella on the other hand skipped straight to dessert and ordered herself a tiramisu, which she’s barely touched, although she’s been quiet all evening. I think coming to a crowded restaurant might not have been the best decision for her.
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We all spent dinner catching up with each other, however, it was mainly Rosa and I speaking, Stella remained relatively silent
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“So An-on, I’ve been meaning to ask you.” Rosa directs her attention towards me as she twirls the pasta with her fork. “Was there anybody you kept in touch with, after… you know?”
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Well considering how I thought everyone I was close with was either dead or hated my guts, keeping in touch didn’t seem like a big priority, not really. Rosa and Stella are pretty much the only friends I’ve had in the past four or so months.
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“Aside from you two, I can’t say that I have.” I answer truthfully as I set my hands slump on the table. “The other friends I made… well…”
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My response causes Rosa’s expression to sour, followed by a look of slight confusion.
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“But what about Trish and Reed? Didn’t you use to spend time with them?” Rosa inquired as she set her fork down as she reached for her lemonade.
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Those two… It isn’t hard to imagine how they feel about me, and I can’t say I blame them. Their best friend is dead because of me. I’d be surprised if they didn’t want my head on a stick. Speaking of, I’m about 90% it was Trish who tried to make that happen the other day.
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“We… weren’t on the best of terms, Rosa. We got into a bit of an argument at prom.” I sigh as the painful memories return to me. “And the things Trish screamed at me when… you know, I’m not sure they want anything to do with me.”
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Rosa looks down slightly, a sympathetic frown growing on her face, clearly upset by the revelation I just dropped.
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“Plus there was that whole shit with Trish sabotaging the projector during the assembly.” I add.
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“I know it’s hard, but please don’t swear at the table An-” Rosa said with a stern glance before being cut off by an unexpected voice.
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“They were just mad that you had better taste in waifus than them.”
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What.
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Both Rosa and I look at each other with a surprised look on our face, before turning to Stella who is sporting an uncharacteristically smug look on her face as she picks off a piece of her tiramisu.
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Okay… Focusing on myself is depressing enough as it is, let’s change the subject.
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“How about you guys? Anyone you kept in touch with from school?” I ask them both, trying to diffuse the awkwardness.
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Stella’s expression soured at the question as her face cringed slightly.
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“N-no… I…”
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Nice going Anon.
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“S-sorry, didn’t mean to bring it up if it was-” I attempt to console the saddened stego.
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“It’s okay… But no…”
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Rosa clears her throat as she’s about to answer “I did keep in touch with a few amigos of mine, but I’m afraid it’s nobody that you knew when you were at school.”
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I guess that makes sense… Even when I did become acquainted with Rosa and Stella, I never really got to learn much about them...
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I wonder if she kept in touch with…. Kept in touch with… what was I thinking about?
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As my mind struggles to remember my current train of thought, the voices in the restaurant become increasingly loud.
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All the monotonous and mundane conversations about their lives. School, work, new movies. Until I hear more voices that don’t sound like they’re really part of the restaurant’s ambience.
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“What’s wrong Anon? Can’t get your fix? Starting to get shaky?”
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“Fucking junkie!”
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“Imagine surviving both a gunshot and a beating only to die in a restaurant from fucking withdrawal”
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These voices become alarmingly familiar, not sounding like they belong to one singular voice, but three different voices overlapping with each other.
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“They’re gonna ditch you too, it’s only a matter of time!”
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“You’ll always be nothing but a loser, a waste of space.”
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“Your parents didn’t want you, your friends didn’t want you, I didn’t want you.”
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I can’t take this anymore.
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Shuffling out of the table, I interrupt Stella and Rosa’s conversation to excuse myself, the voices become so loud, I don’t even know if the words came out of my mouth.
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I get up from the table to go to the bathroom, not before briefly catching the worried expressions of both of my friends.
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My head feels like it’s wobbling back and forth as I struggle to maintain my balance as I pass by several diners and tables. I can make out the sign to the bathroom in the corner of the restaurant, I quickly waddle towards to the men’s room and push the door open.
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Without a second thought, I make my way towards the sink, some cold water should knock some sense into me. Turning on the faucet with one hand, while also using it to support myself, I grab a handful of water and splash it in my face.
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Fuck!
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I wasn’t expecting the water to be that cold, regardless the ice-cold water splashing against my face helps calm me down.
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…
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No, it doesn't…
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Fuck, what did that one guy on that Austrian blacksmithing forum say? Inhale, count to four, exhale, and count to four?
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Taking hold of my right crutch with my free hand, I take a deep breath.
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1…2…
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Before I can make it through the next two numbers, my eyes take notice of the figure behind me, which causes my heart to drop.
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A blur of ashen and black, wings that could only be described as angelic, and a set of amber eyes that shine brighter than any diamond.
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Fang.
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No… Please, not now.
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Contrasting the hateful glare that shot me within my dreams a couple of nights ago, her stare feels cold as ice, while at the same time her facial expression tells a different story.
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Pain, anguish, sorrow, frustration.
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Unable to move, I can only stare at the simulacrum in the mirror, my eyes growing heavier and heavier. I eventually give in and close my eyes as the tears begin to flow.
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“I’m… so… so sorry, Fang.”
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The light returns to my eyes when I open them back up. However, all I see in the mirror is my own reflection, tears staining my face, after expressing regret to a figment of my imagination.
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I need some fresh air…
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Grabbing a hold of my left crutch, I turn around and hobble out the door. But not before another figure stops me dead in my tracks.
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A figure that hasn’t haunted me before, but one I’m all too familiar with.
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A violet Triceratops girl of short stature wearing a yellow hoodie and red boots.
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Trish.
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She takes notice of me, mirroring my own shocked expression
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What the hell is she doing here? She didn’t die? Why the fuck is this happening?!
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She’s not real Anon, it’s just your mind playing tricks on you, just get yourself outside and get some air.
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Moving as quickly, I pass by the shade of my former nemesis, but not before catching a glance of her surprise turning to rage as she mutters to herself.
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“...Fucking bastard...”
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She’s not real Anon, she’s not real.
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Exiting the corridor, my eyes spot the table I was sitting at with my two companions, I’m only to make out Stella’s face since Rosa’s back is turned to me. Stella sporting a look of discomfort, not unlike my own.
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But I can’t let them see me like this.
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Carefully navigating through the restaurant, I do everything I can to avoid being seen by two, I just need to get out of here for a second. Same as before, I get stares and funny looks from most of the tables I pass by. Judging me, inspecting me, pitying me.
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Passing by all the tables, I walk straight towards the front door and hit the automated door button with my elbow.
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I don’t even wait for the door to open all the way, I walk straight out the entrance as the cool wind blasts my face, the sensation intensified from the cool water I just splashed on my face moments ago.
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A group of Doves fly out from above the sign and disperse into the night sky, I must have startled them by accident.
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I take in a deep breath and gaze at my surroundings, the street lights illuminate the streets with the absence of the sun, taking notice at the bench next to the restaurant, I take a seat and attempt to collect my thoughts.
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A sense of relief washes over me as I take the pressure off my leg, or maybe that’s just from getting away from a crowded restaurant?
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Fuck… These hallucinations have been getting worse and worse. And If I’m not hearing random voices or seeing the ghosts of everyone I’ve hurt, I’m dealing with these fucking nightmares almost EVERY night to the point where it’s unbearable.
​
I’d imagine I would have grown desensitized to this by now, considering all the shooters I’ve played and gore I’ve seen online, but to see it happen before my own eyes, and have it played on my mind in repeat, day after day.
​
It’s torture…
​
And the only comfort I can find is in a fist full of pills or drugging myself with enough caffeine to keep me awake for days.
​
Every nightmare, every hallucination, reminding me more and more just how badly I fucked up.
​
How much I failed Fang…
​
“Are you okay, Anon?” A gentle yet familiar voice calls out.
​
Turning my head to face the source of the voice, I see Stella standing to my right, hands behind her back with a worried expression.
​
“Not really, but I’ll survive…” I sigh, shifting myself on the bench to make room for her.
​
Stella takes my movement as an invitation to sit down, her concerned expression unchanged.
​
“Are you sure? You went to the bathroom in quite a hurry, and I was worried that something was wrong.” Stella continues to question me, however, I notice that this is the least anxious I’ve seen her yet, at least in person.
​
I may have told Rosa about what's going with me, but I don’t want to have to spill my spaghetti just yet with Stella.
​
“Yeah, I just needed some fresh air…” I try to shrug off her concerns. “How about you? What brings you out here?”
​
My question seemingly catches her off guard, it’s clear her main focus was checking up on me for some reason.
​
“I… also needed to step away for a second.” She explains with hesitation.“The restaurant was too crowded and loud, and… It just was all too much.”
​
I’m about to speak but it looks like she has more to say, her brow furrowing and exasperation growing
​
“I mean… I told Rosa that I was worried that it would be too busy tonight, but she just said ‘Oh it’ll be fine, don’t worry!’”
​
Her voice growing with frustration as she rants about her friend’s decision, I’m tempted to open my mouth and try to offer what little comfort I can, but it hits me.
​
She’s clearly been holding in these frustrations for some time, it may be better to just let her vent.
​
After all, there’s a time to speak and a time to listen.
​
“I love Rosa like a sister and I know how much she cares about me, but I just wish for once she would listen to me.” The green stego lets out an annoyed huff. “I wanted to go to this really cool Boba place by the mall, but she brushed it off like it was nothing!”
​
Now that I think about it, she definitely seems like she has been a little on edge all evening. I just assumed that it was just her being shy as usual, I didn’t really think there was more to it.
​
Is Rosa really being that pushy with Stella?
​
“I feel like Rosa doesn’t listen to what I truly have to say, just what she would want me to say.” The stego slumps into the bench as she continues to vent her frustrations.
​
Do I say something yet?
​
But before I can think of how to respond, the look on Stella’s face becomes surprised and quickly turns to shame.
​
“Oh no, I said too much didn’t I? I’m sorry, Rosa has been nothing but nice to me, and I must sound like such an ungrateful friend to be saying all of that!”
​
I mean… I don’t really know what to make of the situation between the two, and I don’t want to find myself in the middle of it honestly.
​
Although with the way Stella is looking at me expectantly as if she is looking to find solace with my assurance. From what she said, it doesn’t seem that Stella has any ill will towards Rosa other than annoyance.
​
“Nah, I get it. You feel like she doesn’t listen to what you have to say, that’s pretty understandable. I’d be frustrated too in a situation like that.” I reassure the remorseful Stego, her expression softening with my words. “Have you thought about talking to her about how you feel?”
​
Her face goes white as a sheet. Fuck, did I say something wrong?
​
“I… I can’t, it would be… I mean… I just don’t want to make her upset, is what I’m trying to say. She’s the only friend I have left ever since-” Stella abruptly cuts herself off, with an expression that looks like she’s been stabbed in the gut.
​
“I- ah- I mean she’s pretty much one of my only friends, aside from you.”
​
Glad to know I’m not alone there.
​
“B-but hey, I wanted to ask…”
​
Shit… She doesn’t know, does she? Fuck, did Rosa tell her?
​
“If you wanted to come with me to that boba shop by the mall tomorrow?”
​
Oh…
​
OH!
​
Wait… Is she asking me out?
​
Uhhh……
​
“It’s okay if you don’t want to come Anon, I'm sorry…” Stella turns away, seemingly dejected from my lack of response, unless I was mumbling again like a retard.
​
Damn… I didn’t mean it like that, it just caught me off guard! Why would anybody want to spend time with me? Alone no less?
​
“Wait Stella!” I call out as I rise from the bench, my injury making it difficult to do so.
​
My words cause her to turn back to me, her eyes widen slightly.
​
“Sorry, it’s just… I’m dealing with a lot of shit right now that's-”
​
Fuck, Anon you can do better than that.
​
“W-what I’m saying is that I would love to check that place out with you.” I stammer out, hoping I can recover from this.
​
Stella’s face completely does a 180 as she looks the absolutely happiest that I’ve seen her since we were both in high school.
​
“Really!? Thank you, Anon! I’m so happy you want to come too!” Stella chirps with a glee that’s reminiscent of her old personality.
​
Before I can open my mouth, I’m suddenly hit with a blast of pressure, my mind taking a second to register Stella pulling me into a rather tight hug. Shocked by this reaction, all I can do is simply wrap my own arms around her rather awkwardly.
​
“Oh!” Stella snaps back into reality, pulling away from me. “We should probably head back inside, Rosa’s probably worried about us by now.”
​
She’s right, especially considering how I left the table. I do feel kind of bad leaving her all alone at the table. Hopefully she’s not too pissed.
​
“Oh I’m sure she’ll understand!” Stella responds to my inner thoughts as she rises from the bench, offering her hand towards me.
​
I may be a cripple but I’m not THAT crippled. Still, I still reach for her hand as she helps me up from the bench.
​
“If it’s okay with you, let’s probably not tell Rosa about our plans tomorrow.” Stella says with a slight whisper as we both walk back into the restaurant.
​
“Probably for the best.” I reply.
​
A part of me is surprised that Stella wants to hang out with a weird schizo like me, or why she hugged me like that.
​
I wonder, did she…
​
Is she asking me out on a date?
​
​
A couple of minutes earlier
​
Leaning against the wall, I try to collect my thoughts, or what’s left of them as I wait for my “boss”
​
Or if I could even hear my own thoughts, the goddamn chatter in this place makes it impossible to do so.
​
Seriously, what the fuck’s taking this fossil so long?
​
The way he talked to me on the phone made it sound like it was urgent, but considering how he’s nowhere in sight makes it feel like he’s just wasting my time…
​
Not to mention my added concerns about leaving Reed at the apartment alone while’s high as a kite. I really hope what Moe has for me is worth it…
​
Amidst the chaos of the restaurant, the first thing that coherently comes to my mind is my family. Three sisters, and two brothers. All alone at home, since mom is doing god knows what these days.
​
To this day, I still hate myself for everything that went down that day.
​
“Get the fuck out! Don’t ever come back here bitch ass trigga!”
​
I don’t blame them for one moment, they have every right to hate me after what I did…
​
Lord knows I do…
​
Since Moe’s probably not gonna pull the thumb out of his ass and come and meet me, I’m gonna go to the bathroom and freshen up a bit while I wait.
​
I take two steps towards the restroom, before the door to the men’s room swings open.
​
*THUD*
​
And emerging from the door anxiously is.. Wait…
​
Anon?
​
Ugly bald human, puke green clothes, a crutch under each shoulder and a plastic leg brace on his left leg. It’s definitely him.
​
I can only stare in disbelief, unable to move, like my feet have been bolted to the ground and my arms tied down with cinderblocks.
​
How the fuck is he still moving?! He should be in a Coma after what I did to him.
​
Just the sight of him still moving, alive, breathing, it fills me with a feeling that could only be described as raw and primal.
​
Pure.
​
Unfiltered.
​
Rage.
​
Because I can react, he wobbles past me as if I didn’t exist, but I manage to catch him mumbling something on his way.
​
“...she’snotrealAnon, ….justyourmindplayingtrickson…”
​
Fang did say that he mumbled shit out loud like a dumbass.
​
Just thinking Fang and Anon in the same sentence infuriates me.
​
“Fucking bastard.” I mutter under my breath.
​
I pause for a brief moment as I look out from the hallway to see him waddling throughout the restaurant. A thought occurs to me.
​
…I could kill him right now. Wait for him to go outside, wait till he’s all alone, and finally put that bastard in the ground.
​
Fuck it. I’ve waited long enough
​
Before I’m able to follow him, someone takes hold of my hand, stopping me in my tracks. I turn to see a rather imposing Triceratops man in uniform gripping me by the hand tightly.
​
“Moe’s ready to see ya now!” Letting go as he finished his sentence.
​
I turn back to the seating area to see Anon nowhere in sight, he’s completely gone.
​
GOD FUCKING DAMN IT.
​
If it weren’t for this fucking Trigga I would’ve been able to put this ape down once and for all.
​
If it weren’t for Moe…
​
I stomp my way towards the office of my dipshit boss with furious intent, brushing off the ‘waiter” who restrained me seconds ago. Flinging the door open, I’m greeted with Moe’s dishevelled clusterfuck of an office, I spot him sitting down at his desk about to pour himself a glass of bourbon.
​
“AY TRISH, HOW YA DOIN?” The jolly Tyranasauraus bellows from his chair. “THANK GAWD IT’S FRIDAY EH-”
​
“Cut the shit Moe…” I interrupt his greeting, anger dripping from my words like venom.
​
“YOU HAD ANON HERE! IN YOUR RESTAURANT! AND YOU DID NOTHING?!”
​
My words have clearly taken Moe aback as he just gives me this wide-eyed stare and blinks a couple of times before speaking.
​
“HUH? Anon?” Moe clarifies as the cogs in his mostly empty skull turn as he tries to comprehend my rant.
​
“YES! ARE YOU DEAF? HE WAS JUST IN HERE!”
​
Moe gazes at the ceiling with contemplation while letting out a sigh, then looks down at me a couple of seconds later.
​
“Damn… Guess Today really is busy huh?” Moe lets out a shrug with his diminutive arms. “Anyways, you’se ready for dat job I was tellin you’se about?!”
​
Did this senile old fossil listen to a single word I just said?
​
Anon is here, the skinny who ruined everything, ruined VVURUM DRAMA, ruined my school and killed Fang.. My…
​
“Did you not hear me…” My voice lets out a low growl, barely concealing the rage that leaks from it. “ANON IS SITTING IN YOUR FUCKING RESTAURANT AFTER EVERYTHING HE’S DONE, AND ALL YOU HAVE TO SAY IS IT’S A BUSY DAY?’”
​
Moe pinches the bridge of his snout(or at least attempts to) and lets out another sigh.
​
“Look Trish, everyone’s allowed in my restaurant, as long as they don’t mess with the business or just anyone tryin’ ta have a meal.” Moe looking at me with a stern look, as if I’m the one in the fucking wrong here.
​
“I was hopin’ we could talk about dat security job I was tellin’ youse about since Lil Tro has been up ass over tits lately-” The Tyrannasauraus begins rambling with his typical New York accent.
​
I can’t believe this… He doesn’t give a shit at all! Wasn’t Fang like a niece to him? They always talked about how cool of an ‘uncle’ he was, and how because of him our band was able to get our first live audience!
​
But now he just wants to ignore everything that happens, and let the fucking monkey who killed Fang just walk off scot-free??
​
“I’m going to kill him, Moe. Just say the word.”
​
Moe retorts by rolling his eyes and letting his arms fall limp on his desk, making a small thud sound. “Trish… In the middle of my restaurant? Out in da open? Don’ be stupid.”
​
What fucking right does he have?
​
“You’re the one who sent me after him! Remember?” I point a finger at him while my voice raises in volume. “YOU SENT ME TO KILL HIM, WHY NOT LET ME FINISH HIM? YOU WANTED HIM DEAD!”
​
“I WANTED RIPLEY OFF MY FUCKIN’ BACK!”
​
Ripley… Fang’s dad?
​
Moe falls silent, but the stare he pierces me with says it all.
​
‘Don’t be a fool Trish. Be the bigger person. Quit your yapping!’
​
As if I haven’t heard that shit from other people constantly.
​
“Why…” I choke out, my voice barely containing my anger. “Why are you so against it, he killed Fang remember?”
​
“No… He didn’ Trish, Lucy gat herself killed.”
​
My fist clenches in response, not knowing to be madder at him deadnaming Fang or the fact that he just said Fang killed themself.
​
“I met da kid, member? I told him to be supportive to Lucy. Clearly, he wasn’t.” The defeated Tyrannosaurus shrugged. “I mean don’t get me wrong, he’s a stupid fuckin’ kid, and he made a horrible, horrible mistake, but you can’ deny that he must be hurting too, just as much as you?”
​
He’s hurting.
​
He’s hurting?! After all the times he ignored them?! After all the times he misgendered them?! How he fucked us all over at the concert?
​
“HOW THE FUCK IS HE HURTING MOE?!”
​
“Because Trish… He loved her, I know he did…”
​
The rage inside me reaches a boiling point, I can’t take this anymore.
​
‘SO DID I ASSHOLE!!!” I shout at him, depriving my lungs of air.
​
My words pierced Moe’s stoic presence, switching to a look of stunned silence.
​
“I loved Fang, Moe.” I struggle to speak, from being out of breath and from overwhelming emotion.
​
“I loved them ever since 9th grade, I loved their smile, their talent, their eyes, I wanted to tell them for the longest time how I felt about them, but I was scared… Scared someone as beautiful as them wouldn’t think the same of me.”
​
Moe remains silent, but reaches for the glass of bourbon on his desk and takes a slow sip.
​
“Right when I worked up the courage to finally confess how I felt and ask them out, Anon fucking shows up out of nowhere and ruins everything! The Band! Fang! Everything!”
​
Moe sets his glass down as he pushes himself away from his desk, looking at the ground with contemplation.
​
“That's why I’m gonna kill him, whether you like it or not, Moe.” I lean over, placing both my hands on his desk.
​
“No, ya not.” Moe replies as he rises from his chair, towering over me.
​
“Ya know, you’re not even doin’ the dirtiest of jobs around her. I don’t think you want the ones who do payin’ you a visit, you feel me?” Moe growls at me, his piercing glare doesn’t phase me at all.
​
There’s no reasoning with this pussy, Fang would be ashamed that they even called him an ‘uncle’
​
“You know what, screw you, Moe. I’m done.”
​
I turn away from him, stomping towards the door and place my hand on the handle, but before I can turn it, he calls out
​
“Trish… wait!”
​
“Why asshole? Didn’t you want me to leave?” I huff without even giving him a glance.
​
“This ain’t what Lucy woulda wanted.”
​
So I should just forget everything? Pretend it all never happened, like Fang never existed and just let that skinnie piece of shit live happily ever after?
​
“You don’t know a fucking thing about what Fang would’ve wanted…”
​
I fling the door open as my earholes fill with the ambience of the restaurant, drowning out whatever else Moe has to say. If he even has anything left to say.
​
Walking down the hall of the lively restaurant, I take notice of the emergency exit being left open by a brick, allowing anyone to enter and exit without triggering the alarm.
​
Wonderful, I don’t feel like going out the main entrance and looking at any of those pompous fucks in the eye.
​
Pushing open the door, I’m hit with a rather chilling breeze as if the November wind is sweeping me into the night.
​
I find myself in the alleyway behind Moes, garbage bags scattered all around me, rats picking at the remains in search of scraps. If this geezer could pay me to go do jobs for him, why is buying a dumpster is out of the question?
​
Ehh whatever, I don’t think I’m gonna find that ape here anytime soon, so I’ll probably just go home. Assuming Reed hasn’t burned our apartment down.
​
Exiting the alleyway, I enter the streets ready to check out for the night, however, a pair of familiar voices pull me from my stupor.
​
“Have you thought about talking to her about how you feel?”
​
“I… I can’t, it would be… I mean… I just don’t want to make her upset, is what I’m trying to say. She’s the only friend I have left ever since-”
​
I guess he didn’t leave after all..
​
I quickly turn away to get some distance between me and the voices, taking cover behind the corner I just emerged from moments ago.
​
My eyes finally spot Anon on the bench, talking with… Stella?
​
That weird Stego bitch from high school? She always was a fucking loser back then, so I can’t say I’m surprised to see them together.
​
I still remember that presentation she did about anime in sophomore year, and how most of the class got detention for laughing at her to the point where she left the room in tears.
​
I mean if you can’t handle it, why act like a weirdo in the first place?
​
My thoughts are interrupted when I see Stella get up from the bench turning away from Anon. Not before this crippled monkey of a man rises and starts saying something that causes her to turn around, and… wait
​
She’s fucking hugging him?!
​
Ew… why?
​
Not trying to give myself away, I have to mentally fight the urge to gag at what I just saw.
​
Wait…
​
Did he just ask her out?
​
What was previously disgust, quickly turned to anger, spreading through my body like an inferno.
​
Was one fucking person not enough for him to ruin?
​
Still… It’s not like there’s really much left to ruin in someone like Stella.
​
But, the two seem to be close… And I’m assuming they’re close with Rosa too, since she was with them both when she stopped me, fucking bitch…
​
I’ll have to keep an eye on her, and Rosa. Since Moe’s useless to me now, these two should lead me to him.
​
I’m coming for you skinnie…
​
​
Forty Minutes Later in Skin Row
​
Yawn
​
Goddamn. I can’t remember the last time I ate that well, real food for a change too! Not what passes for food in the freezer section at the dollar store. At this point, I’m feeling tempted to give Rosa a gift basket.
​
Although I think I see what Stella was talking about, when she and I returned to the table, Rosa was not the most thrilled about it
​
“¿Dónde Estaban?! You left the table in a trance without a word, not to mention how long you were gone! Something could have happened to you again!”
​
Although to be honest, I’m not exactly proud of what happened, and I can’t imagine it would put anyone’s mind at ease to see their cripple friend waddle to the bathroom while mumbling to himself like a schizo. I guess I can kind of see where Rosa was coming from.
​
“An-on! You okay?” The sound of Rosa’s call snapping me back to my senses.
​
I find myself standing at the elevator, with Rosa and Stella waiting for me outside the door.
​
“U-uh yeah! Sorry” I reply as I quickly move my way out of the contraption before the door closes on me.
​
Rosa lets out a chuckle, placing a hand on my shoulder. “It was great to see you again An-on, I’m hoping we can find the time to meet up again sometime soon!”
​
“Yeah sure, I’d be down for that again,” I answer as a slight smile forms on my lips.
​
“H-hey Rosa, would it be okay if I had a moment alone with Anon?”
​
Hearing Stella’s request, the ankylosaur turns to her with a surprised expression painted across her face, with hints of hesitation. However, the smile returns to her face as she glances my way.
​
“Por supuesto, Stella. I’ll just be in the lobby waiting for you if that’s okay?” Rosa affirms followed by a nod of Stella’s head, prompting her to walk towards the stairwell.
​
“Buenas noches An-on! It was great to see you again!”
​
The two of us wait as the footsteps grow quieter until it’s followed by the sound of a door opening and closing.
​
“So… What’s the plan?” I turn towards my stegosaurus companion.
​
Stella places a hand under her chin (or lower beak?) in contemplation, the gears turning in her head. “I was thinking maybe we could meet there around one? Does that time work for you?”
​
One in the afternoon or one in the morning?
​
Stella responds to what I assumed was an inner thought with a deadpan look, while stifling back a giggle.
​
“I-I’m kidding, One sounds great” I attempt to brush off my own tardiness. “By the way what’s this boba place called again?”
​
“Oh, it’s called Bubb Lee!”
​
Was she telling me the name of the spot or a dad joke? Although judging from her enthusiasm I guess it’s the latter.
​
“Awesome, I’m looking forward to checking it out, I’ve never had boba before.” My explanation caused Stella’s eyes to widen in shock.
​
“What?. You never tried it?! Well tomorrow, we’re changing that!” Stella strongly affirms, bereft of the anxiety that plagued her earlier tonight.
​
“But anyway, I’ve probably kept Rosa waiting long enough, I’m gonna go meet her downstairs, but I’ll see you tomorrow Anon!” said Stella as she presents me with a warm smile before turning towards the elevator.
​
Walking towards the elevator and pressing the down-facing button, the door opens before the cheerful stego almost immediately due to our previous use. After entering the elevator, Stella turns around to face me and flashes a peace sign
​
“Bye Anon!” Stella says her goodbyes as the blush on her face grow into a mixture of pink and green.
​
I reply to her with a wave and a smile as the door closes and separates us both, leaving me alone in the halls of my derelict apartment.
​
Walking back to my room in deafening silence, I begin to fixate on what I just got myself into.
​
I’m meeting with Stella tomorrow, a girl that I’m friends with, for some boba, alone.
​
My mind focuses on nothing else except what I just agreed to, there’s a big part of me that’s nervous since the last time I’ve hung out one-on-one with someone was… When I was with Fang…
​
Standing frozen outside of my door, the gut-wrenching memory hits me like a train, reminiscing of the time we spent together, both inside and outside of school, how we found a piece of ourselves in each other.
​
…And all the times we could have spent together if I had been a better person.
​
Fuck… Not now.
​
I insert my key in the doorknob, trying to fixate on the inner workings of the contraption in an attempt to distract myself from my own thoughts.
​
My hand moves the bronze-coloured device as it merges with the inner workings of the door.
​
“You took me away from my friends! You ruined our band!”
​
No…
​
I turn the key as it responds with rhythmic clicking, allowing me to open the door and greet me to the sight of my shitty room.
​
“That would be too much of an honor for you…”
​
Shut up…
​
Entering my apartment, I immediately close and lock the door, and kick off my shoes as I hobble towards my bed almost instinctually, directed by my growing exhaustion and how I ate enough pizza to put me into a diabetic coma. With better judgement, I would avoid going to sleep again and try to find ways to keep myself occupied, but this isn’t one of those times.
​
Setting down my crutches while trying to balance on one foot, I flop onto the bed and begin to rest my eyes. It’s funny to think that Rosa’s couch is comfier than my bed, but I guess it beats having no bed at all.
​
Within minutes I feel myself drifting to sleep, along with the blur of emotions plaguing my mind. Just the general fear I have about my financial situation, worrying how much longer I can stay in this place by relying on government handouts. And of course, the guilt that still haunts me every waking moment with how I handled things with Fang, how I could have handled things.
​
And yet, buried under all that bullshit, there’s a part of me that’s excited to see Stella tomorrow, there’s a lot I don’t know about other than what kind of anime she likes and of course the whole tarot thing with her. And judging from her blush at the elevator, I guess she’s excited too.
​
But there’s just one thing I still don’t know.
​
Is she asking me to hang out, or is this a date?
​
Does she… Do I….
​
….
​
THUD
​
What the fuck?
​
I shoot up from my bed, startled by the sudden banging noise that woke me up. Scanning my room, everything still seems to be in place, nothing missing or broken, just a shitty messy apartment.
​
“Did I really mean anything to you at all Anon?” A feminine voice calls from my left.
​
That voice, no…
​
I turn to investigate the ‘intruder’ and my suspicions are confirmed when I see none other than Fang sitting in my desk chair, leering at me with scorn, her eyes full of disgust.
​
“F-Fang, I-”
​
“Shut the fuck up Dweeb, I’ve already heard enough of your bullshit when I was alive.” Fang brushes me off with her hand as the scowl on her face grows. “Not to mention how much you let me suffer, and how you couldn’t even save me.”
​
I rise from my bed, positioning myself closer to the spectre of my former girlfriend
​
“No… Fang, I didn’t mean for any of this to happen. I fucked everything up, and I am so so sorry.”
​
Fang’s eyes glow with anger in response to my apology.
​
“Don’t give me that bullshit, I know for a fact you’re not actually sorry,” Fang growls as she rises from the desk chair, looming over me. “You were concerned over your ‘precious Xrox controller’ than you were about me after I had the worst night of my life, remember?”
​
She’s right… I was selfish, apathetic, and worst of all a coward… And I still am those things.
​
“No shit, Anon!” A new voice emerged from my right.
​
I turn to see Naomi standing in the hallway of the kitchen, staring at me with an aura of hate that rivals Fang’s.
​
“The fact that you’re moving on so quickly after meeting with Rosa and Stella just proves how little you gave a fuck about Fang!” Naomi stomps her foot as she grows red with anger. “You really making new friends will absolve you of your sins?!”
​
Fang responds with a chuckle as her scowl turns into a rather sadistic-looking sneer. “For once I agree with this cunt. Since you’re going on a date with one of them tomorrow, tell me Anon…”
​
“Are you going treat Stella as horribly as you treated me?”
​
No I-. Fuck, this is all too much. This isn’t a date… Is it?
​
“Wow, I always knew you were a fuckin’ loser but I didn’t think it was this bad.” A new voice enters the room, this one sounding far more masculine.
​
I look back towards the hallway and see Naser moving past Naomi with a smug look.
​
“The skinnie lives in his own filth like a pig, why am I not surprised!?” Naser chuckles as he gazes around the room with judging eyes.
​
“He lives in his own garbage, he treats people like garbage, and what do you know? He’s garbage himself!” Fang chimes in with her brother’s taunting.
​
Shut up… They would never say this… would they?
​
“Were you planning on taking Stella away from her friends and family so you can ruin her life too?”
​
“Why couldn’t you just stay at rock bottom?!”
​
“No matter how much you pretend, you’ll always be a piece of shit!”
​
“I should have just left you to rot all alone.”
​
“I made a mistake aiming for your leg, I should have aimed for your stomach!”
​
The voices begin to rapidly overlap over each other, making it increasingly difficult to tell which words are coming out of the mouths of my tormentors. As they continue to taunt me, berate me, shame me.
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It has gotten to the point where their jeers have become incomprehensible, sounding more like white noise rather than actual words, all before completely devolving into laughter
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Despite any lack of coherent speech, their presence still stabs at my heart all the same. Their taunts overwhelming my mind like a storm, breaking any steady thought and emotions inside, until I notice…
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Naser’s chest begins to ooze with a dark crimson, progressively staining his jacket.
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No. Fuck! No no no, not again.
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Naomi’s head begins to pour with blood, adding new streaks of red to her naturally peach-colored hair.
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I can feel my heart drop and my face turning to white as I see my former friends turn into corpses before my eyes as their laughter grows alarmingly deranged.
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And just when I thought it couldn’t get any worse, I turn back to my desk chair and I see Fang.
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Oh my god…
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The feathers begin to drop from her wings like flies, to the point where her wings are completely bare, her otherwise monochrome appearance now paired with a new shade of pink.
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Out of all of the voices, Fang’s laughter unsettles me the most, a flurry of emotions evident from her facial expression, sadism, hate, grief, rage.
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The sight of it terrorizes me and breaks my heart at the same time.
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However what I saw next only struck more fear into my heart.
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As my former girlfriend’s laughter became more frenzied, the more damaged her appearance became. Bruises begin to grow on her body almost instantly, her scales becoming more and more discolored, until I take notice of her ambers eyes…
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Her amber eyes begin to leak tears of blood.
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The grotesque sight of it causes me to hyperventilate frantically as I watch my friends around me turn into corpses puppeted by my own hysteria
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Every urge in my body is telling me to hide, but I don’t deserve to hide. I did this to them, they have every right to punish me.
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“No…”
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I’m snapped out of my shellshock as I notice Fang raised her claw, as she roars with anger.
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“THAT WOULD BE TOO MUCH OF AN HONOR FOR YOU!!” Fang screeches at me with immense fury before striking me across the face.
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Instinctually, I close my eyes, but nothing happens.
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I open my eyes to see the bodies of my former friends are nowhere to be found, scanning across the apartment frantically as I rise from my bed.
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I begin to shudder with horror as I recall what I just witnessed moments ago.
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My horror quickly bubbles into anger, but not at my situation, or the revenants that haunt my dreams…
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I am angry at myself, I fucked up everything.
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I begin to fall back into my bed as I pant with an uncontrollable fury…
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“FUUUUUUUUCCCCKKK” I cry out in anger, slamming my fist against my mattress.
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…
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Am I doomed to be nothing more than this… pathetic, uncaring, horrible person?
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And what if they’re right?
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What if I hurt Stella and Rosa the same way I hurt them?
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…I can’t let that happen again.