# Story Two - Roombasion

It’s Saturday evening.
Anon looks over as Reed finalizes writing down another set of lines on a computer console in a room full of other servers. Anon wonders to himself how he might have never seen the I.T room back when he was a student of Volcano high, especially when it was this fancy. ‘Maybe Spears had it installed after I graduated,’ he ponders. Though with all the raw power the machines could output, he questions why the school had been so stingy with its bandwidth back in the day.
“And… there we are, bro! That should be the final line needed to get this show on the road,” Reed cheers as he pulls back and sighs, all the while wiping a few beads of sweat off his brow.
Anon looks over at the code and nods a few times while stroking his chin, lacking the hair necessary to make such an action meaningful.
“Hmm… I see…” Anon whispers as he stares deep into the last lines of code written by his pink velociraptor companion. He narrows his eyes as the human tries his best to absorb the code. Appreciate the code; BE the code…
“You… have no idea what’s on the screen, do you?” Reed asks with a growing smirk on his lips.
“Yeah. No clue,” Anon admits as he turns to look at his friend and shrugs. “Still, you wrote a lot, so that’s impressive at least.”
“Bro, shouldn’t you, like, actually know what’s on the code? You know, just in case you have to like, debug stuff, and I’m not available to do it?”
“Probably, but I’m not good with coding. Besides, I kinda have my hands full already, what with trying to keep this school running in tip-top shape.”
Reed lets out a laugh as he exits to the main menu of the operating system and sets the system to an automated function. “I don’t mind helping out my best bro learning to code. Besides, you never know when it might come in handy.”
“Fair, I guess-” Anon replies as he waits for Reed to put the final touches on the system. “I’ll clear a day for it sometime next week. I’m thinking Thursday?”
Reed’s lips rise into a wide, all-encompassing grin. “My man, did you go ahead and do what I think you did?”
Anon gives his friend a broad ear-to-ear smile of his own. “That’s right, Taco Thursday. Students love it!”
Reed lets out a cheer as he fist-pumps the air. “Oh hell yeah! I’m SO down for Taco Thursday!”
Reed types out some more commands on the main menu of the operating system, all the while his lips salivate at the idea of gorging himself on delicious Mexican food. He had to hand it to the cooks for taking and somehow improving on Rosa’s already spectacular cuisine. Quite the accomplishment if he was honest with himself.
“Aight, bro. System’s more or less set to go-” Reed stands up from the chair and motions to the computer. “Wanna do the honors?”
“Are you sure everything’s good to go?” Anon asks as he takes a step towards the computer.
“Yup. You just gotta press that little button there, and the system Oughta spring into life!”
“Any last details I should keep in mind before I press the button?”
Reed lets out a laugh as he reaches for his trademark thermos. “Nah, bro. It’s all coolsville from here on out.”
Anon gives Reed a nod and looks at the screen before him. Emblazoned in bright green and white is a box, the question ‘Activate Room Fleet System?’ waiting for any user to confirm or deny.
“Be honest with me, Reed. You think it’s a good idea to use roombas as my school’s cleaning crew instead of janitors? Lucy thinks I’m crazy for even suggesting it.”
Reed laughs and pats Anon on the back. “Bro, this is, like, the greatest idea ever! You’re a true visionary, my man. You’re like…” Reed looks down at his hand and counts with his fingers before snorting and shaking his head. “You’re like a hundred steps ahead of everyone else in the United Nests! This crap will revolutionize school cleaning n stuff, man!”
“I’m just happy you were able to provide most of the materials. I owe you BIG.”
“Anything for a bro!” Reed replies as he takes yet another sip of whatever it was that was in his thermos. Anon had a good idea of what it was that Reed was sipping down like water. His principal instincts told him he should scold Reed for even thinking of having—let alone using—narcotics on school grounds. Then he remembered that it was Reed he was dealing with. The pink raptor was never one to shy away from drug use and drug possession, even when they were students. Besides, it was a weekend, and they were probably the only people on campus that late in the evening—no need to worry about them setting a bad example for the students of Volcano High.
With a final deep breath, Anon pressed the Y button on the keyboard. Soon as he does, the screen goes white for a few seconds before more strings of code begin playing on the screen. Following that was the whirring of a hundred different machines all over the campus.
Reed made another fist-pump motion and turned to face Anon. “Right on! This shit’s ready to rock!” he brought a hand up and smiled with the kind of jubilation one only witnessed after completing a long, arduous, yet rewarding task. Anon, realizing what his friend wanted, obliged Reed by slapping his raised hand with his own, all the while smiling just as widely as his dino friend.
“Thanks, Reedman. Couldn’t have done this without you!” Anon exclaimed with a wide toothy grin.
Reed waves at Anon, all the while snickering like a teenager. “Shiet, bro, I’m happy to help out a bro in need!”
Anon grabs Reed by the shoulder, and he leads him out of the I.T room. “Dinner's on me tonight!” The human cheers as he shuts off the lights allows the system to continue its functions without further human or dino input.
“Oh hell yeah!” Reed cheers as he takes another sip of his thermos. “Let’s hit up Moe’s. Haven’t had one of his pies in forever!”
“You got it. Let me just call up Lucy so she can meet us there!”
“Sweet!” Reed exclaims as he almost hops for joy. Both human and raptor leave school grounds, Anon performing the usual alarm arming routine. Anon, confident that everything’s looking like spring, doesn’t wait for the alarm to fully arm before departing with Reed in tow, the two content with their work on the roomba fleet. Why, in Anon’s mind, he’s just accomplished something that no other principal in the United Nests probably had even considered. Sure, others may call him crazy… but craziness often led to brilliance. Or, at least Anon hoped so.
Unbeknownst to both Reed and Anon, while the alarm went through its arming phase, back in the I.T room, one of the roof tiles moved to the side very carefully to not disturb the area in too obvious a manner. Carefully, a bag full of mechanical materials descended to the ground. A figure garbed in all black except for their fluffy purple raptor tail soon followed after the sack. The figure’s face betrayed any attempts at recognition, the heavy black balaclava making sure of that. The instant the intruder touches the ground, they rush towards the nearby alarm paneling. Using an admittedly fancy PDA, they insert a strip of wires into the console and begin tapping away. Seconds later, and with an affirmative beep, the school alarm is deactivated before finishing its activation sequence.
The intruder attaches the PDA to the alarm system and then turns to face the main computer in the I.T server room with a sigh of relief. The intruder rushes towards the computer and activates the system with a smile creeping over their shrouded face. Lines upon lines of code appear before them, and they, in turn, smile as wide as they possibly can. Wasting no time the instant the system becomes accessible via keyboard, the intruder begins tapping away at the keyboard at speeds that would have put champion typists to shame. With each passing second, the intruder rewrites Reed’s hard work, changing parameters, and twisting the code into an unrecognizable facsimile of what it used to be.
When the intruder has altered the last code, they press the execute command on the system. At that point, another loud din of hundreds of small motors and vacuums resonates through the empty halls of Volcano High. With another command input, the intruder orders every roomba on campus grounds to leave their designated patrol areas and instead make their way towards the I.T room.
Within a matter of minutes, hundreds of roombas appear from seemingly everywhere. The audible sound of their suction motors was the only warning that the machines were appearing from out of the walls, almost as if the devices were coming out of the walls. With another malicious smile on their lips, the intruder reaches into the bag they had brought with them and pulls out what almost looks to be some kind of miniature railgun. They call one of the machines to the front, the machine coming forth without a single bit of hesitation. With practiced speed and skill, the intruder installs the ‘weapon’ upon the roomba without wasting a single second. Soon as the intruder finishes their work, they call forth another machine and get to work on it, all the while cackling madly. The intruder repeats the process again and again. Their cackling only grows louder and more deranged with each machine they modified...
--- --- ---
​
The following day, Principal Anon’s car pulls up in front of the school at precisely six in the morning. Out steps Anon, Lucy, and Reed.
Anon and Lucy are dressed in a very formal casual style, with Anon opting to wear his old trademark green plaid shirt over a black turtleneck and a pair of dark gray chinos of the same brand that Naser wears on the regular. Lucy, meanwhile, sports her tan dress sweater and light blue pants, the outfit not that dissimilar to what she wears on daily while teaching.
In complete contrast to the two members of Volcano High’s staff, Reed wore a pair of faded and ripped black shorts, a two-toned striped green sweater, and a cyan undershirt just a size too big for the raptor’s small frame.
“I’m telling you, man, something’s up with the system,” Reed explains to Anon as the trio make their way up the main stairs and towards the school’s main double doors.
“And you’re sure it’s not some kind of minor glitch that you couldn’t fix from your computer?” Anon asks as he reaches for the school keys.
“I would’ve if I could, but something’s also blocking outside access to the school network,” Reed answers as she tries once again to access the school’s wi-fi via his phone, to no real success.
“I mean, we did have to increase network security after Anon bricked the entire network playing that cheezy low-resolution video,” Lucy argues, all the while giving Anon a scolding glance.
Anon gives his wife a warm smile. “Hey, I said I was sorry. Besides, it was funny!”
Lucy rolls her eyes and crosses her arms. “Yeah. Hilarious,” she says in a deadpan tone.
Reed remembers the situation and how much of a mess that had turned out to be. He was honestly surprised the computers didn’t go up in flames from the strain the program put them under. The raptor gives a slight chuckle at the memory but otherwise keeps his mouth shut for fear of incurring Lucy’s wrath.
It was far too early in the morning to get chewed out by the Mous matriarch.
“So, what exactly is the problem?” Lucy asks, turning to face Reed. “Only thing Anon told me was that it had to do with the main server or something like that.”
“Nah, man, not the server. The code INSIDE the server,” Reed answers in his usual chill self.
Lucy perks an eyebrow. “Is there… any difference?”
“Yah!” Reed answers as he once again pulls his phone and scrolls through remote data he could not access properly. “One’s hardware. The other’s software.” He taps the phone fruitlessly and eventually gives up with a loud groan. “Think of it like, a car. If the engine’s busted, ya gotta either fix it or get a new engine. But if the driver’s donzo, then ya gotta get a new driver, even though the car’s fine.”
Lucy shot Anon a glance and shrugged. Anon chuckled and turned to face his wife.
“What Reed’s saying is that it’s not the machine that’s the problem, but what’s controlling the machine.”
Lucy again tries racking her brain for some kind of answer, but ultimately, she gives up with a frustrated sigh.
“Whatever it is, I hope it isn’t something that’ll affect us tomorrow.”
“That’s why we’re here to check on the system,” Anon responds to his wife’s words. “The last thing we want is a bunch of non-functioning robotic vacuum cleaners disrupting classes and causing all kinds of mayhem. As funny as that would be.”
“Oh, don’t you even start with that!” Lucy practically roars, causing both Anon and Reed to flinch. “I don’t want to hear any of your guy’s nonsense today. I’m already kind of on edge leaving Amber with Stella.”
“What? You bros worried about Stella?” Reed asks as he lets out a chuckle. “Brah, she’s like, totally chill and kid-friendly!”
“That’s what worries me,” Lucy says as she fidgets around a bit. “What if Stella introduces Amber to something super violent like that Dragon Ball show that she and Rosa like so much?”
“Dragon Ball, violent?” Anon lets out a chuckle and shakes his head. “Dragon Ball is super vanilla! Knowing Stella, she’s probably showing Amber some kind of kiddie mecha show like Gundam Build Fighters or Zoids or something like that.”
Lucy gives anon a confused look. “I have no idea what you just said, but it worries me a bit.”
Anon can’t help but have his wife’s words pierce through his thick skull as he too wonders what Stella is introducing little Amber to…
---Meanwhile, in the Mous household---
​
Stella is ecstatic about what she’s showing Amber next. She stands up from her seat and begins pumping her first in the air just as the TV blares the intro to the anime she had chosen—one of her all-time favorites, in fact. Amber, meanwhile, looked on with a mixture of excitement and confusion as her unofficial aunt’s excitement grew with every passing second.
The music picked up in intensity, the lyrics starting up soon after. Stella, with wide-eyed rapture, quite literally jumped up in the air as she began to sing along to the opening to the anime show ‘Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann’ at the top of her lungs:
“Kimi wa kikoeru? Boku no kono koe ga
​
Yami ni munashiku suikomareta
​
Moshimo sekai ga imi wo motsu no nara
​
Konna kimochi wo muda de wa nai!”
Amber, suddenly feeling a jolt of energy the likes of which she’d never felt before in her life, begins to excitedly flap her wings in genuine excitement and hops around the living room, the music filling her soul with such levels of determined vigor that it makes her feel like she can kick logic to the curb and do the impossible.
She looks into her auntie Stella’s eyes and, despite never once hearing the song before in her life, repeats the next set of lyrics almost word for word and in complete tune:
“Hashiridashita omoi ga ima demo
​
Kono mune wo tashikani tatauteru kara
​
Kyou no boku ga sono saki ni tsuzuku
​
Bokura nari no asu wo kizuiteiku
​
Kotae wa sou itsumo koko ni aru!”
Stella cheerfully claps, which only prompts Amber to flap her tiny wings with that much more excitement. The two then join together to sing the following verse in the song, their voices intertwined in their enthusiasm:
“Sugita kisetsu wo nagaku hima wa nai
​
Nido to mayotte shimawane youni
​
Kazoe kirenai hon no sasaya kana
​
Sonna koukai kakaeta mama!"
"Sono senaka dake oikakete koko made kitan da
​
Sagashite ita boku dake ni dekiru koto!”
---Back at the front entrance of Volcano High---
​
Anon taps his chin a few more times before laughing heartily. “It’ll be fine!” Anon reassures his wife as he, at last, unlocks the door. “You worry too much. Besides, I have complete faith in Stella.”
Lucy lets out a snort, but a smile still forms on her lips nonetheless. She still thought Stella was a bit on the weird side—especially with her whole tarot readings and astrology stuff—but Anon was right; she was worrying way too much. ‘Besides, if he trusted her, then I should probably trust her just as much too.’
With Amber’s daily care more or less settled, Anon, Reed, and Lucy enter Volcano High’s premises. Everything appears as mundane as they remember, not a single aspect of the main hall out of place. That bodes well for their task that day. Yet as they stepped further in, something suddenly struck the trio as not quite right.
It was silent. Far too silent. There was no beeping of an alarm warning whoever had just intruded to rush towards the control panel to shut off the device, nor the sounds of dozens of tiny robotic vacuums patrolling the hallways as their programming dictated. The silence was, in fact, almost deafening…
“Uh… is it me, or are things way too quiet, even for a Sunday?” Anon asks as he turns to look at Reed and Lucy.
“Well, no one’s on campus at all on Sunday,” Lucy chimed in, also looking around the eerily silent hallways. “Even if we had janitors, which we no longer don’t because of a certain someone’s hair-brained scheme—” the ptero matriarch says as she shoots Anon a glare, “—They wouldn’t be around today. Still… something does feel… off…”
“Yeeeah, man… this shit’s far too quiet… REAL creepy-like…” Reed adds as he too begins glancing around. “Where are the roombas?”
Anon and Reed look at each other. As they do, Reed’s face twists into one of anger and disappointment.
“Like, goddammit, man…” Reed exclaims just loud enough that his voice some ways into the empty and silent halls. “Here I thought I got the system down all ironclad-like, but from the silence and the fact that the little roombas don’t seem to be anywhere, something did screw up with my programming...”
“We don’t know that yet, Reed,” Anon answers, putting a hand on the downcast raptor’s shoulder. “For all we know, it could just be a simple glitch in the system and have nothing at all to do with the code itself.”
Reed gives Anon a nod of acceptance. Even so, the human can’t help but feel that his long-time friend doesn't quite believe the same thing. He’s almost tempted to reassure him further, but something tells him that it would make him come off as condescending.
Whatever other thoughts Anon has going to his mind are quickly discarded when, all of a sudden, the school alarms go off in a blaring chorus.
“Shit!” Lucy shouts at the top of her lungs as she rushes past the reception area and to the back of the admissions desk, where she inputs her code to shut off the alarm, only to have it not work whatsoever.
“What the hell?” Lucy says out loud as she inputs her code again, only to have it come up as invalid once more.
Anon himself is ready to jump the desk and assist his wife with the code when his ears suddenly pick up the sound of air suction. He turns his attention down the hall, where he sees what must be at least two dozen little roombas coming towards them, their intention unknown, but their eye sensors glowing a bright red, making them appear to be enraged at whoever dared intrude upon their domain.
“Well, there’s the roombas!” Reed says as he turns to face Anon. “Though, like, I don’t think they’re supposed to have those red lights, are they?”
“No, they are not,” Anon replies as he finally manages to bypass the primary alarm system, shutting off the alarm and bringing in a slight sense of peace.
“Hey, bro,” Reed says as he points towards the tiny machines, all of whom continue to move towards their locations steadily. “Did you, like, make any modifications to the roombas before we left yesterday?”
“Not really,” Anon answers as he makes his way out of the office and next to Reed. “Why’d you ask?”
Reed points towards the little machines. The raptor’s about to open his mouth and speak his next set of words when the machines suddenly stop in their tracks, the sound of tiny motors whirring as whatever is strapped to the top of the chassis steadily aligns itself in their direction.
Before either Anon or Reed can process what they are seeing, the sounds of small pops begin to resonate throughout the hall. Seconds later, thousands of tiny balls start bouncing off the walls, roof, and ceiling, each one popping and spreading paint on impact.
Anon and Reed both dive behind the nearest wall to avoid the attack. Lucy herself takes cover behind the nearest desk, barely avoiding a volley of the tiny paintballs aimed in her direction.
“Anon!” Lucy shouts, all the while glaring at her husband. “What did you do!?”
“I swear, this isn’t my doing!” Anon snaps back, himself not sure what was now happening before his eyes.
Lucy turns to face Reed, who waves his arms in a panic. “H-hey, this ain’t my doing either!” he manages to stutter out, all the while fearfully trying to avoid directly gazing into Lucy’s rage-filled eyes.
The Mous matriarch lets out a groan. She’s not entirely buying the fact that her husband or her friend didn’t have anything to do with the situation now unfolding before her. Even so, she was finding it hard to believe that the two would so carelessly put the school at risk as she was now witnessing. ‘Anon can be an idiot, and Reed’s a pretty good enabler of that idiocy, but neither of them would pull something of this magnitude,’ Lucy thinks to herself. She tries to figure out some way to stop the literal catastrophe unfolding before her eyes as she thinks that. Because if they didn’t stop whatever it was that was now happening before Monday rolled around…
Lucy sighs and facepalms. They already have enough trouble as is, thanks to Anon’s constant tomfoolery. He may mean well sometimes, but that doesn’t stop his various jokes or pranks from being particularly disruptive.
“So, Reed,” Anon starts, all the while doing his best to keep his body out of whatever targeting parameters the roombas had. “How do we stop the roombas from doing… whatever the hell it is that they’re doing right now?”
Reed ponders the question for a second before the answer hits him pretty plainly.
“We gotta reach the server room and shut down the main computer that’s controlling them.”
“Great!” Anon says as he peeks over the side of the wall he’s using for cover, only to barely avoid getting hit in the face with a small paintball. “So, uh… how do we get past all the roombas so we can reach the third floor?”
Reed taps his chin as he wonders the same thing. Eventually, he shrugs and shakes his head. “Dunno, amigo. We might just have to book it and hope we don’t get splattered with paint.”
Anon lets out a frustrated sigh as he tries to think of a plan. ‘If only RAYmba were here. I’m sure he could talk to his brethren and get them to back off or something,’ the human muses as yet another stray paintball explodes close to his head.
“I mean, RAYmba’s like, pretty advanced for a phone roomba and stuff, but I don’t think they’re going to be winning over any of this bunch. They seem PRETTY pissed off at us, for some reason.” Reed’s eyes light up, and a sizable creeping smile forms on his lips.
Anon almost instantly knows what is about to happen, and he shoots a preemptive glare towards his salmon-toned companion.
“No. Don’t you EVEN think about it!” Anon warns Reed.
Reed’s smile only grows wider at his friend’s warning.
“Reed, I swear to Raptor Jesus...” Lucy chimes in, also shooting her friend a glare.
Reed chuckles as he looks between Anon and Lucy mischievously. “I guess you can say we’re the only ones who can stop...”
“REED, DON’T!” Anon and Lucy shout in unison.
“...This ROOMBASION!” Reed exclaims, a wide goofy grin forming on his lips as he does.”
Both Anon and Lucy can only reply to Reed’s words with a collective facepalm. Even the roombas on the other side of the hall momentarily cease firing their pain pellets. A few even turn right around and depart the scene.
Reed can’t help but chuckle at his pun…
---Meanwhile, on the top floor of Trish’s horn care and beautification office, downtown Volcaldera---
​
Trish was typing away at her desk, careful not to let her anger over all the paperwork she still needed to complete bleed over into her writing. She could hardly keep a straight face as she typed out yet another letter explaining to her distributors why it was so crucial for them to get her precise drilling bit sizes instead of the standard bits sold commercially. It was honestly all so tiring for her. She wanted nothing more than to down a stiff drink while tossing insults at the first person who so much as dared to contradict her.
Suddenly, a shiver ran up her spine, causing her entire body to tremble for just a second. The sensation forced Trish to stop typing as she REALLY absorbed the feeling. She thought hard as to what the phenomenon could mean, and after not much thought, he came to the only realization that made sense to her: Somewhere, Reed had just made such an incredibly lame pun as to make the very universe cringe in reply.
Trish allows herself a small break as she gets up from her desk and walks to her office window. She looks out from her top-floor office and out towards the surrounding city, wondering just what on earth Reed could have said to cause her to cringe despite being so far away.
The triceratops doesn't know why, nor does she care. All she knows for sure is that the next time she sees Reed, she’s going to punch him hard.
Very, VERY hard...
---Back in Volcano High---
​
Ignoring the literal aneurism that both Anon and Lucy felt like they were going to have over Reed’s words, the trio decided that now was as good a time as any to try and move on up towards the second floor. The problem was, there were still at least a dozen roombas waiting near the stairs. Getting past them would be a considerable challenge, that was for sure.
Anon suddenly comes up with an idea. Not a great idea, granted, but it was the best shot they have currently. “Reed, Lucy, I’m going to use myself as bait. While I do that, you two book it for the second floor.”
Lucy gives her husband a look of shock. “You sure that’s a good idea? You’re not exactly the most well-coordinated guy around.”
Anon narrows his eyes at his wife but does not say a word to her. ‘Ouch. That hurt,’ he thinks to himself instead. Shaking his head, Anon stretches out a hand. Seconds later, a bunch of tiny paintballs try to hit it, the majority missing pretty wildly.
“I don’t think these roombas have good targeting. I don’t think I need to be too agile to avoid getting pelted.” Anon withdraws his hand and points to the stairs. “Not like we have another choice, honestly.”
Lucy, begrudgingly, agrees with her husband’s reckless scheme. She looks to Reed, who gives both Anon and Lucy a nod of understanding.
“Okay. On three then,” Anon says as he skids to the side and places himself just shy of the wall’s edge. “One,” he begins counting, pointing with his hand. “Two…” he lowers his profile in preparation for his next move. “THREE!” he shouts, leaping out of the wall and right into the sights of the Roombas.
Just as Anon predicted, the sudden movement attracts the attention of the tiny machines, all of whom turn their tiny weapons towards their new target. Less than a second later, they are firing indiscriminately at Anon, who starts to run in the opposite direction, causing the machines to give chase and leave a large gap for Lucy and Reed.
Both raptor and ptero take the opportunity to run towards the stairs. As soon as they arrive, they take cover behind the wall. Lucy peeks over and spots her husband hiding behind a pillar. “Anon!” she shouts, drawing his attention to her. “We’re good!”
Anon gives his wife a nod and surveys the situation. He notices that if he’s bold enough about it, he can easily hop over the heads of the tiny machines, though he wonders if he’ll take a few stray paintballs in the process. Still, it’s a risk worth taking, especially now that they are close to their goal.
With a deep sigh to steel himself, Anon lets out a warcry and rushes the machines, who are so stunned by the human’s sudden decision that they hesitate in their action. It gives Anon just the necessary opening to jump over the first few roombas before hopping over the heads of the next few. It doesn’t take long for the machines to aim and fire in his direction, however, and Anon winces as he feels a few paintballs hit him in the ass. Regardless, the tactic works, Volcano High’s principal can dash the remainder of the way towards the stairs, almost diving out of the way as both his wife and friend grab him by the arm and help him back to his feet. Wasting no further time, the trio dash up the stairs, not once looking back for fear of seeing a small swarm of robotic vacuum cleaners trailing after them.
The trio practically dives out of the stairs, hitting the second floor’s floor with a pretty solid smack. They allow themselves a sigh of relief before standing back up.
Lucy is the first to do anything other than catch her breath as she approaches Anon and hugs him. “Oh, that was so freaking stupid!” she scolds her husband, all the while embracing him like she just very nearly lost him. “Don’t EVER do something so reckless again!”
“I mean, not like we had much of a choice,” Anon replies, all the while rubbing the sore spots on his back and ass where he got struck multiple times by paintballs. He winces as he touches a few choice places near his ass, already dreading the bruises that would no doubt form later.
However, the small celebration is cut short when the trio hears the distinct sounds of suction coming from down the hall. The trio dives towards the nearest door, which Anon manages to unlock in record time. As the human and dinos hide in the darkened room, they hear the machines pass them by, their little mechanical eyes scanning for any sign of the intruders. They stick around for about half a minute before moving on down the hallway.
Anon leans out the door to see if the coast is clear. He manages to catch the machines turning down a corner, vanishing from sight.
Anon narrows down his eyes at the sight. It almost looks like the machines are hunting them down under the orders of something… or someone…
With the coast more or less clear, Anon motions for the three of them to move on. Quietly, the trio makes their way down the hall and towards the next set of stairs. But before they can safely reach said stairs, a few more Roombas appear from out of nowhere. Unlike the other roombas from the floor below, these don’t have paintball railguns strapped to them. Instead, the roombas appear to have something else strapped to their chassis, something that looks very much like…
“PAINT BOMBS!” Anon shouts as he kicks the nearest roomba out of the way. The instant he does, the bomb attached to the chassis detonates, causing a massive splash of paint to stain the floors and walls.
Lucy and Reed heed Anon’s warning, and they too move out of the way just as two more of the machines approach them before detonating. Because of the warning, neither ptero nor raptor got painted on, but the blast was close enough that a few specs of pain still made their way to the pair.
“Like, holy crap, dudes! I didn’t program the roombas to be mad jihadist!” Reed comments as he tries to wipe away some of the specs of paint that managed to land on him.
Both Lucy and Anon give Reed a flat look. Anon was very much tempted to say ‘really’ out loud, but he keeps his mouth shut for the time being, as they have more pressing matters than scolding their friend for his lame sense of humor.
Reed lets out a sigh as he reaches into his pocket. “Oh man, I don’t think stuff would ever get this bad,” he laments as he grabs something, which he then brings out somberly. “But guess I was proven wrong!” he half cheered before once again turning somber.
“What are you talking about?” Lucy asks as she fixes her friend with a concerned look.
Reed turns to face Anon and extends his hand, motioning for the human to come forward and take whatever was in the palm of his hand. Anon looks around for a bit, and after giving it a bit of thought, nods and steps forwards, extending his hand to accept whatever it was that his dino friend had to offer him.
“My dude, when it comes to programming ‘n shiet, you gotta be able to cover all your bases, and cover your ass as well...” Reed opens the palm of his hand, dropping the item had been lugging in his pocket all morning. Anon looks at the palm of his hand and realizes that the object Reed dropped on his hand is a USB stick.
Reed lets out a chuckle as he puts his hand in his pockets and glances down at the floor. “That stick contains a kill code for my programming. I wrote it just in case there was some kind of glitch. Didn’t think I’d ever actually end up using tho,” Reed says as he gives a single bitter chuckle. “Guess I’m not that great a programmer as I thought I was if my little project went this far south…”
“Uh… how often do your programs go haywire that you need to pre-empt a killswitch?” Lucy asks, not quite sure how to take the sight and words that were unfolding before her.
“My dudes, I promise this has only happened…” Reed looks down at his hand and begins counting with his fingers, each number bringing further shame to his eyes before he gives up with a frustrated sigh. “Okay, it’s, like, happened enough times that I gotta cover my ass. And no, that last pyrotechnics snafu wasn’t all my fault. I’m good with tech ‘n shiet, not fireworks and explosives. How was I supposed to know that the guy wanted half-loads of gunpowder instead of half more?”
Neither Anon nor Lucy said a word to Reed in regards to what he said. They make a very deliberate decision not to think about it more than a surface consideration. They already had enough on their plate with the roombas running amok.
“Okay, let’s worry about that little revelation later,” Lucy chimed in, grabbing both Anon and Reed by the shoulders and turning them to face the other end of the hallway. “We still have a third floor to get to.”
Both Anon and Reed nod in agreement. Not that dwelling on the past would do anything for anyone at this point.
The trio once more set out down the hall and towards the stairs, careful to keep their movements silent despite their hastiness. It wasn’t easy for them, but they eventually make it to the stairway leading up to the next floor.
Just as the trio is about to celebrate their small victory over the roombas, one of the tiny machines just so happens to pass by, spotting the human and dinos. Soon as it does, it lets out a shrill set of beeps that travel all across the hall. In less than a second, the entire second floor is swarming with roombas, both of the shooty and exploding variety.
The trio starts to make their way up the stairs, but it’s clear they aren’t going to make it far with the swarm right behind them. Things were, indeed, looking quite grim for the trio of Volcano High alumni…
It was in that moment that a realization dawned upon Reed, one he had been quite eager to try and push to the back of his mind. At least until now. As he looked over at the mob of robotic cleaners, it dawned on him that there was only one way out of the mess he most likely started in the first place…
Reed turns to face his friends with a warm yet sorrowful expression. The corners of his lips rose as he made peace with the decision he was about to make. ‘For the sake of my bros,’ Reed thought as he took a step towards the mob of mechanical contraptions.
Lucy is the first to realize just what it was that Reed planned on doing. With a wide-eyed look of horror, she reached out and grabbed his friend by the arm, all the while giving him a pleading stare. At that moment, whatever doubt she might have held towards one of her oldest friends vanished as regret over her previous words supplanted her previous assumptions.
Reed softly removes Lucy’s hand off his arm and lets out a chuckle that’s almost full of confidence, at least until near the end, when a bit of the young raptor’s doubt bubbles up to the surface. He turns to face Anon, the smile on his lips not once wavering. “It’s all up to you now, amigo,” Reed says as he takes another step towards the mob of automated vacuum cleaners. “Stop the machines. Save the school!” he suddenly yells at his friend as he tosses himself into the fray, landing right in the middle of the swarm of machines.
“REED!” Lucy shouts to no avail. She reaches out fruitless towards her friend, stopped from going further by her husband’s grip on her arm.
Within seconds, the machines are upon the raptor, tackling and falling upon him like a swarm of hungry locusts. Lucy looks away as Reed’s body vanishes underneath the multitude of roombas. He doesn’t scream. If he does, his voice is drowned out by the sound of furious suction…
“Come on!” Anon shouts as he grabs Lucy and leads up the stairs and into the third floor, which is utterly devoid of machines, much to his relief. They don’t stop running until they've reached the front door of the IT room, at which point the two collapse near the wall and allow themselves to catch their breath.
In this moment of respite, Lucy, unable to bear the thought of losing her friend so suddenly, breaks down into tears. “Why?” she asks herself as she struggles to remain standing. “W-why would he… do that?”
Anon has no answer for his wife. Instead, he only grips the USB Reed gave him. It was now up to him to end this catastrophe and avenge his friend’s sacrifice. Furthermore, he makes a promise to himself. ‘When this is over, I’m naming my next kid in your honor, Reed…’
Anon helps his wife back up. He wanted so badly to give her some time to grieve, but time was sadly something they didn’t have the luxury of, especially now that they were so close to their goal. Now was the time to finish what they started and avenge their fallen friend. Now was the time to set right what had gone wrong.
Anon and Lucy look at each other, and with a nod, they both take a step towards the door. They had no real idea what awaited them on the other side, but whatever it was, they were going to face it together as husband and wife.
Anon reaches for the door handle and turns it, opening it to a mostly dark room filled with various servers and a single master computer that controlled all aspects of Volcano High’s technology, including the roombas now terrorizing the campus.
Anon is the first person to set foot in the room, followed soon after by Lucy. The pair look around at the seemingly empty space with some relief. Yet, deep down, they can’t help but feel a pang of unease. It’s far too quiet and calm. It honestly couldn’t be this easy; something horrible had to be waiting for them.
Almost as if in reply to their innermost thoughts, the sound of a larger vacuum motor whirs to life. Anon and Lucy turned towards the sound source, making itself known as it rounded a corner to approach the human and ptero.
The Roomba is enormous in comparison to its brethren, easily the size of a large dog. Upon its chassis, the name ‘R.O.U.S Mk I’ is printed in big, bold letters for all to witness.
Lucy’s eyes widen in the realization of what the acronym stands for. She turns to face her husband with a flat narrowed-eyed look. “Did you and Reed buy a roomba of unusual size… to fill some kind of joke quota...?”
Anon turns to face his wife and gives her an embarrassed smile and a shrug of his shoulder. “It was funny at the time, okay?”
Lucy pinches the ridge of her snoot and lets out a frustrated sigh. ‘Oh wonderful. My husband’s penchant for ‘funny business’ just doomed us both…’ Lucy bemoans to herself.
Soon as Lucy finishes her thoughts, the machine trains its significantly larger paintball gun in the direction of the human and ptero. There is only a second between the sound of pressurized air prepping and the machine firing its salvo of paintballs. It gives Anon and Lucy just enough time to dive behind the nearest piece of cover, which in this case turns out to be a nearby desk.
With the situation now as grim as it could be, Anon and Lucy found themselves with dwindling options. They had no way of fighting back against the oversized roomba, and stepping into its line of sight guaranteed a lot of pain from its paintballs. They couldn’t stay hidden behind the desk, however. Sooner or later, the machine would deduce that all it had to do was move over to one of their sides to fire away without interruptions.
Realizing the situation’s grimness, Anon concludes that he dreaded but knew needed to happen if they were to end the roomba takeover of Volcano High. It was a conclusion that terrified him, however…
Steeling himself and gritting his teeth, Anon grabs Lucy by the shoulder. “We don’t have much time or much choice,” he starts, grabbing hold of his wife’s hand and placing upon her palm the same USB stick Reed had given him in the previous floor. The human then leans in and kisses his wife passionately on the lips before hugging her as tight as he could. “Tell Amber that I love her,” he whispers into his wife’s ears as he breaks the embrace and stands up.
Before Lucy can even say a word, Anon stands up and shouts at the R.O.U.S, drawing its attention fully to him. Anon doesn’t even get a chance to step away too far from the desk before the R.O.U.S begins to fire in his direction.
“GET TO THE COMPUTER!” Anon shouts at Lucy as the paint pellets begin pelting his body, exploding in splashes of red; all the while, Anon screams in pain at every shot he receives.
Despite the tears forming in her eyes, Lucy heeds her husband’s words and hops over the desk. She rushes around the R.O.U.S, which momentarily stops pelting Anon with paintballs as it begins tracking Lucy’s movements past it. Lucy, however, pays it no mind, her full attention instead set on the computer terminal behind the automaton. Filled with nothing but pure determination, Lucy steps over the large roomba. She jumps up into the air, hovering past the machine and a sizable gap before landing right in front of the terminal controlling all the roombas in Volcano High.
When the R.O.U.S can switch its targeting parameters to her, Lucy has already slammed the USB into one of the open computer slots. A big red ‘run’ prompt pops into the screen, and Lucy practically slams her fist down on the enter key.
In less than a second, the code within Reed’s USB stick injects itself into the same data within the computer, overwriting whatever malicious programming had caused the roombas to go haywire. With one final whir of its motor, the R.O.U.S shuts down completely. As it does, all sounds save those coming from the server cases, once again leaving the school sounding eerily silent.
With the roomba threat all but nullified, Lucy rushes to her husband’s side. She kneels next to the downed human and grabs onto his body. “A-Anon?” she whispers, gingerly rocking his body side to side, seemingly to no avail. “Anon!” Lucy shouts, grabbing on to her husband as tightly as she possibly can, all the while burying her face in his chest.
Anon lets out a single snort in reply to his wife’s actions. “Lucy, y-you’re a bit too melodramatic…” he whispers, all the while holding back the urge to wince in pain from the pressure Lucy’s putting on several sore spots on his body. ‘Oh yeah, some of those are going to bruise real soon,’ Anon muses as he tries not to think about how purple his chest and abdomen are going to be later.
Still quite emotional over the situation, Lucy wipes her tears off and helps Anon back to his feet while supporting him to stand straight. She gets a chance to look over Anon’s outfit, which is now more red than green or gray. As she did, she wondered to herself just how much washing she’d have to do to get all that paint off. Or if washing would even do anything at all. Still, Lucy discarded those thoughts at the relief that the nightmare was over. The so-called ‘roombasion’ was over.
Anon looks over at the now deactivated R.O.U.S, suddenly appreciating the silence far more than earlier. ‘Still, we lost far too much today,’ Anon ponders somberly as he recalls Reed’s fate earlier that morning…
Suddenly, a hand grasps Anon’s shoulder, causing him to turn back in shock. The hand is attached to a paint-covered pink raptor, one that looks like he got the world’s worst cow licking from a vacuum all over his hair and clothes.
“Hey, bro!” Reed exclaims wearily, all the while also nursing sore spots where he no doubt got pelted with paintballs. “Looks like my kill switch worked! Awesome…” He lets out a wince and leans against the nearest solid surface, in this case, one of the servers.
“Reed!” Anon exclaims as he rushes forward to hug his friend. “I thought those little monstrosities got you!”
Reed chuckles as he motions to his body. “Oh, those little suckers tried their best, but I was just too slippery for ‘em!” He lets out a wince as he rubs his chest. “Still got me pretty good tho. Never want to see the underside of a roomba ever again…”
Anon’s only reply is to laugh alongside his buddy. Lucy, meanwhile, can only roll her eyes and giggle.
The Mous matriarch allows her jubilation to naturally end before turning her attention to the still deactivated R.O.U.S. In particular, to its grafted paintball gun. “Okay, fess up. Whose bright idea was it to strap paintball lunches on the roombas?” She turns to face Anon. “Was it you?”
Anon and Reed look at each other before shaking their heads. “Wasn’t any of us, honest,” Anon answers with just as much confusion in his voice as his wife.
Reed, still wincing with every step, walks up to the main terminal within the IT room and begins typing, sifting through the code in the system for a possible answer. After about a minute, the raptor’s eyes go wide. “Uh, Anon… you gotta come and take a look at this…”
Anon heeds his friend's advice and steps forward, standing next to him as Reed points to various pieces of code displayed on the computer screen. “You seeing what I’m seeing?” Reed asks, all the while pointing at multiple pieces of code that just don’t seem to make any kind of sense for its intended purpose.
Anon takes a closer look. Even someone as computer illiterate as himself could tell that something was very wrong with the code. It almost looked liked…
“Someone sabotaged the coding,” Reed and Anon speak in unison. They both step away from the computer, not quite sure what to make of the discovery they had just made…
--- --- ---
​
Across from Volcano High, atop the rooftop of a nearby two-story apartment complex, a particular purple raptor stood by, a smile spread across their lips.
While angry that their plan had been foiled before Monday rolled around, they are at least content that, while the original plan to tear down Volcano High had failed, they at least got a little bit of amusement at seeing Anon get so beat up by yet another of their stupid decisions.
The purple raptor laughs as they come up with another scheme to pull off next time. Perhaps something to do with their upcoming estrus season preparedness?
“That’ll teach Anon and everyone to forget about my existence,” the purple raptor says as they turn around and leave the rooftop. “I’ll show them all what happens when they pretend that I was never there, to begin with!”
The purple raptor smiled wide. The age of anonymity was coming to an end. Soon, everyone would remember who they were:
“Sage…” the raptor whispers, the grin on his lips only growing wider with each passing second...