# Light Inside One Shot 2

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“Alright, Stella. We’ll see you then,” I said.
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“I won’t be late!” Stella’s voice came through into my ear ringing with overexcited glee. “I’m gonna ring Rosa up and tell her right now! Bye, Anon!”
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“See you.”
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I hung up and dropped my phone down onto the coffee table in front of me, sitting back into the couch for a brief moment. Organizing a date and time that worked for everyone was a bit more of a hassle than I would have liked, but it wasn’t like it was the first event I’d planned now. We’d settled eventually on a simple Saturday evening dinner out at Moe’s – maybe not the most high-class of venues, but we all knew the place. It had history with all of us to some extent, and it was a reputable joint in its own right. The pizza there was damn good even after Moe’s retirement.
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“How’d it go?” I heard Lucy ask from the apartment kitchen, calling out over the sounds of sizzling meat and the plastic scraping of her spatula.
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“All good. Stella said she and Rosa would be there, no surprises,” I replied as I stood up and made my way over to join her. “Trish managed to get any word out of Reed yet?”
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“I haven’t called her yet,” Lucy shrugged. “I was going to after dinner. Or, actually – could you ring her and put it on speaker for me? My phone’s on the table, I think.”
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I tapped her password in and scrolled through her contacts list to find Trish’s number. It had become kind of familiar to see by now, since that first time she’d called me. I placed it on speaker as I made the call and set the phone down on the table.
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Trish answered before the third ring, her voice coming through with enthusiasm. “Heyyy, Lucy! How are you?”
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“Hey, Trish. It’s Anon,” I greeted her cordially. It was an odd thing to describe, but hearing her so happy to talk to Lucy made me oddly happy as well. It reminded me that I could trust her, I suppose. “Lucy’s here too, though, you’re on speaker.”
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“Oh. Hey, Anon.” Trish said again. “What’s that noise in the background? Sounds like bad static.”
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“Hey, Trish. I’m cooking dinner. It’s stir-fry, can’t step away from the stove,” Lucy answered, turning away from her cooking slightly but not pausing her stirring.
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“Oh, shit! Stir-fry? Please tell me you’re ringing to invite me over.” Trish’s voice was suddenly filled with eager hope.
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“Uh – Well, no, actually. It’s not vegetarian, sorry Trish,” Lucy laughed. “I could show you how to make one if you want to come over tomorrow or something, though! Stir-fries aren’t too hard.”
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“Aw, your cooking’s so good though...” I could practically see her purple face falling even from this end of the phone. “What did you ring for, then?”
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“Just wanted to let you know we’ve got Stella and Rosa on board for Saturday,” I replied.
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“Have you had a chance to talk to Reed? Is he going to be there, too?” Lucy chimed in.
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“Yeah, I rang him up earlier today. He said he’d be there, no problem,” Trish gave an airy affirmation. “That reminds me, Lucy, I forgot to ask last time we were on the phone. Did you want me to give you his number so you guys can talk?”
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“No, no need. I was going to ask him when we see him on Saturday. I’d rather catch up in person,” Lucy said gently. “It’s... been a pretty long time. I’d rather talk face to face, you know?”
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“Oh yeah, true. Alright,” Trish sounded a little taken aback for a moment, as though she simply hadn’t considered that possibility. Her voice fell off for a moment, before she audibly rallied herself to keep going with a deep intake of breath. “Alright. Hey, Listen, Lucy, I wanted to ask you... I’ve still got my old bass laying around, and I wanted to ask if you’d like to bring your guitar along and... maybe we could play something together. What do you think?”
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For a moment Lucy didn’t respond. With her facing away from me, looking down at the frypan, it was hard to tell what she was thinking. Internally I was glad that Trish had had the good sense to ask beforehand this time and give Lucy time to think, instead of trying to spring it as a ‘surprise’. I found myself hoping she would say yes – if for no other reason than that I simply loved to hear her playing, but I wouldn’t deny that I found myself hoping she’d want to play for an audience again as well. Even if it was only an audience of a few.
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“... I wouldn’t mind, Trish, sure.” Lucy answered slowly, nodding her head to herself with ramping confidence. “Do you think they’d actually let us, though?”
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“I don’t see why not if we kept it quiet, we could just say we wanted to play for our friends, right?” Trish was picking up steam now, her voice full of eagerness again. “We’d have to practice something together. Is there anything you’d want to play?”
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“I don’t know off the top of my head,” She shrugged. “It’d have to be something simple. This Saturday doesn’t leave us a lot of room to practice even if you come over every day.”
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“Maybe something from Vvurm Drama?” Trish suggested enthusiastically. “I still got like the tabs and stuff from our old songs! Wouldn’t be exactly the same without Reed on drums, but I dunno if they’d let us get away with bringing a drum kit in as well.”
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“Maybe not, Trish... That kind of music might be a bit loud for a restaurant...” Lucy responded with a note of trepidation.
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“Oh... You think so? We played it there once before,” As fast as it came, all the hot air blew out of Trish’s voice.
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“Yeah, but we’re not gonna get away with that this time if we’re not holding a concert there, Trish. Especially with Uncle Moe gone,” She explained. “And besides, I don’t really remember them that well, and... I think we should just do something easier. Something we can practice pretty quick and just have fun with it, right?”
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“Yeah, you’re right. Alright...” Trish said, just a tiny amount of reluctance audible in her answer. “But what, then?”
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“I don’t know off the top of my head. Do you want to come around after work tomorrow and we can figure something out?”
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“Sure, sounds like a plan,” Trish agreed. “Alright, then, I’m gonna take off. I was just about to drive home when you guys called. Call you tomorrow, okay Lucy?”
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“Sure! See you, Trish!” Lucy said happily as she returned her attention to her cooking.
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“See you, Trish.” I echoed as I hung up the phone and stood up.
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Lucy shot me a smile as I approached her. “Hm. Me and Trish, playing together again. I’d wondered if she’d want to,”
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I sidled up beside her as she tossed the stir-fry around in its pan. “I’m looking forward to hearing it. You gonna be Fang again, just for the night, huh?” I was just ribbing her, but behind the joke I was at least a little serious.
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Lucy met my eye nervously for a moment, before she looked back down with an embarrassed smile. “... thought I told you not to call me that, Anon. Do I have to dig up some cringy old nickname from your past to call you?”
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“Sure, that’d make it fair. You could just go with the obvious, I guess. Naruto or something, why not?” I suggested for her with a chuckle.
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“You’re not supposed to help coming up with your own nickname!” She laughed, pushing me away with mock exasperation. She stopped stirring for a moment afterward, her face turning up in introspection. “... Fang again, though... I don’t know, Anon. If I was going to, I wouldn’t be exactly the same. I’d want to be... a bit better than Fang. Like... the best of Fang. You know? If that doesn’t sound too dumb.”
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She turned her gaze to me slowly, as if to quietly gauge my reaction. In response I moved back in and pulled her into a warm hug as she resumed her stirring. “I’d love to see it, Lucy.”
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We stayed together for a few moments, her head resting lightly on my shoulders before she stood up straight and nudged me away a bit. “Gotta keep stirring, Anon.”
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“Okay. You still don’t mind Sweet Tooth though, right? Just checking.” I asked.
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She let out an amused little laugh. “If my hands weren’t busy right now, I’d whack you around the head.”
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“I thought that’s what they made wings for.” I pointed up to the feathery appendages in question.
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Again Lucy’s head shot up, this time in sudden and sharp realization. Her amber eyes fell upon me, alight with the arcane depths of eldritch knowledge I’d apparently imparted. A smile that spoke of wicked mischief spread across her face, and suddenly I had a very bad feeling about what I’d said.
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I flinched away as I felt a feathery slap against the back of my head. “Ow!”
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She snickered playfully and turned back to the frypan. “You’re really smart sometimes, Anon.”
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“Thanks, I think,” I said as I rubbed the back of my head, trying not to show her my dumb little smile. I’d really invited that one on myself.
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“You’re welcome,” She beamed. “Just about ready, by the way, Anon. Gonna plate up in a few minutes.”
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“Alright, sweet. I’ll go and ring Naomi and Naser and let them know as well before then.”
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“Do we really have to invite Naomi –” She started up in earnest, but then cut herself off with a guilty sigh and a dismissive wave. “... Forget I even started saying that. Wouldn’t be fair if we didn’t, I know. Just do me a favour and make sure that Naser’s coming as well? Maybe he can keep her wrangled a bit,”
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“He should be, but I’ll make sure.”
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She gave another short little laugh as I left the kitchen and picked my phone back up off the table. I wasn’t sure how exactly much she was joking with that, but she had promised Naser she’d give Naomi a real shot, so I was certain that was what precisely she would do.
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Every evening after work that week, the apartment was filled with sounds almost reminiscent of band practice in the auditorium as Trish came over to practice music – and cooking – with Lucy. I made it a point to stay out of the kitchen while they were working on dinner, as it was already pretty crowded with just two people, but from what I heard while doing my own work Lucy was quite competent as a teacher. She put in a sizeable effort to get Trish involved, never making her sit and watch. She had a real knack for teaching, just like I’d surmised back when I first returned to Volcaldera, but whether she realized just how good she was at it was another matter.
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She seemed a bit less willing to take the lead after the dishes were washed and they’d turned to their guitar and bass, however. As a matter of fact the first evening they spent at it ended up being half practice and half jam session, as they chopped and changed between trying to pick a song they knew and trying to make something up off the cuff. Trish seemed a lot more amenable to Lucy’s input than she had been back then, at least. I’d half expected her to push again for them to do a VVurm Drama song, but she didn’t so much as bring it up. I offered a few choice suggestions of my favourite old boomer rock, but those were pretty summarily passed over.
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Just like those lunchtimes back then, I ended up mostly sitting aside and weighing in when called upon to provide my opinion. It gave me an odd kind of nostalgic rush, even though it somehow didn’t really feel like it had been long enough since then that it would count for nostalgia. As they finally settled on a simple little song and started rehearsing in earnest, all they were missing was the sound of Reed’s drumming and his occasional barely-there quips.
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Trish had visited our apartment a bunch of times before, but always with the palpable veneer of politeness that seemed non-negotiable when you’re visiting someone else’s home. The constant visits quickly eroded that, however, and she seemed to became much more relaxed. That week she turned out to be much more personable company than I would have ever thought possible of her back in high school. It made me wonder if this hadn’t been what she was like when Lucy was friends with her, before the year I met her. Seeing her like this, it wasn’t such a stretch to believe that she was someone Lucy had once been friends with more than half her life.
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When Saturday finally rolled around, Lucy and I made sure to leave half an hour earlier than we needed to, just in case there had been any sort of issues with the booking we needed to sort out. I offered to carry Lucy’s guitar case in for her as we found a spot in the closest carpark – which wasn’t actually that close given the joint was in the middle of Little Troodon – but she waved me off with a smile, insisting she had it well in hand. To our surprise, as we made our way there, we found somebody already waiting for us out the front. A familiar pink raptor was leaning on the building’s ornamental railing, maybe a little taller, a little tidied up and a little better dressed, but still very much recognizable as Reed.
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He gave us a lazy half-salute as we approached, appearing at ease but still seeming slightly hesitant, as though he was uncertain of what he should actually say. “Hey, uh... Hey guys. Hey, Lucy, Anon. How’re you guys doing? S’been a while, hasn’t it?”
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“Hey Reed. It really has,” Lucy said, her voice warm, as though the last time she saw him was just yesterday. “I’ve been doing alright, though. A bit better each day, you know?”
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“Hell yeah man, that’s the way you want it going,” Reed smiled and shot her his trademark finger guns, visibly emboldened by Lucy’s reception. He turned to me with a casual nod. “Hey, Anon. Jeez, man, you hulked out these last few years, huh?”
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“Army life tends to do that to you, Reed,” I grinned as I held out a hand for him to shake.
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“Army?” His eyebrows shot up abruptly and he blinked blankly a few times even as he pulled himself off the railing to take my proffered hand. I got the feeling he was holding back something he wanted to say, probably about the government or capitalism or something. “... Huh. Damn, man, wouldn’t have seen that coming. Must’ve been rough... Looks like you made it back in one piece at least, though.”
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“Funny, Trish said pretty much the same thing,” I chuckled. Seemed like he hadn’t changed much at all – a rock standing against the waves of time. A lanky, pink, spaced-out rock, but a rock nonetheless. “How’ve you been going? What have you been doing all this time?”
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“Ohhh, man, you wouldn’t believe it,” He said eagerly. “When we got out of school I had the greatest idea, right? I thought what I’d do was, right – I’d open up a medical carfentanyl dispensary! It was a bit rough starting out, but it’s going great now. I’m pretty sure I’m like, on track to be the richest raptor in the world at this rate.”
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“A... medical carfe dispensary?” I was unable to keep the surprise out of my voice. I hadn’t realized that was the kind of thing that would ever... well, actually exist. “I guess that’s using the old noodle. I didn’t even know it had medical applications.”
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“Oh yeah man, like you wouldn’t believe. There’s all kinds of stuff you can apply it to if you treat it right. Headaches, tension, torsion, stress – it all melts away like warm water, man!” He beamed happily. His normally placid tone was now somewhere between excited enthusiast sharing his craft and amateur salesman making his pitch. Odd as hell but I think it might have been the single funniest thing I’d heard from him. “People all over are starting to learn about the medical – and mental – benefits of carfe! I’m even working on an extra-mild mix for humans, like you. Hey, you should come and like, guinea pig for me some time, man. I know you’re good for feedback.”
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“Uh – Maybe sometime, sure,” Or maybe not. I was pretty sure it was either him or Trish who’d first told me it would melt my skin right off, and I’d only heard the same sorts of things again while I was deployed.
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“Hell yeah man, it’ll be awesome,” Another flash of the old finger guns as he turned back to Lucy. “What about you, Lucy? What’ve you been up to?”
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“Well, I got my associates’ degree, and I got a job teaching pre-school,” Lucy smiled. “And here, look –”
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She showed him her hand with our wedding ring on it. Unlike with Trish, I didn’t have to show him my ring as well for him to get the picture. His face lit up almost immediately.
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“Oh, yeah! Man, Trish told me you guys got hitched!” Ah, that explained it. “Cool! Congratulations, guys! I kinda always thought you guys would make a cool couple.”
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“Thank you, Reed,” Lucy smiled. “But... Other than that, nothing as exciting as you, I’m afraid.”
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“Well, getting married’s pretty exciting, isn’t it?” He said. He quirked one eyebrow and cracked a wicked smile. “Any kids on the way yet?”
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At first I couldn’t muster up much more than a cough at the unexpected question as I shared a glance with Lucy. “Well, we – haven’t really thought about it,”
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“Haven’t really thought about it,” She concurred at almost the same time, shooting me an embarrassed smile. “... Not ruling anything out just yet though, I don’t think,”
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“Hey, I’m just ribbing you guys,” Reed chuckled, raising his hands placatingly. “Prob’ly better not to rush into anything anyhow. Anyway, you guys seen much of Trish lately?”
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“Every day after work lately, in fact!” Lucy laughed, clearly relieved at the change in topic. She brought her guitar case up to show him. “Me and her were going to play something after we eat, if people don’t mind.”
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“Oh, yeah, she was telling me about that on the phone too,” He said knowledgeably. “I thought about bringing my old drumkit, but I didn’t think they would let me get away with that. I’m glad you guys are all talking again, though. She was... pretty miserable for a while. That last year at school... There was a few months I think I was like the only person she talked to. I tried to play, like, counsellor for her, as much as I could. But she wouldn’t stop beating herself up over it all.”
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“Yeah, it...” Lucy’s gaze fell down to the ground. “... hasn’t been a good few years for any of us, I suppose. What she did... I know she didn’t mean it all like that now, but it still hurt, Reed. Back then I couldn’t take it.”
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“I know...” He shook his head regretfully. “I’m sorry, man. I shoulda done something more to try and talk some sense into her, but I thought... Well, I dunno what I thought. I thought she’d cool down and think it through, I guess. I thought she’d –”
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“Hey, it’s alright, Reed. It’s all in the past,” Lucy interrupted him with a reassuring tap on the shoulder. She looked back to me for a moment with a smile. “Just dumb teenagers making dumb teenager mistakes. We’re moving past it now. That’s what’s important.”
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“I... True. I guess so,” He seemed taken aback for a moment, but his face settled back into his relaxed smile quickly enough. “No sense dwelling on it now, I guess.”
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A lull fell over the conversation, dampening down the heavier turn it had taken. In its absence I finally noticed the chill of the early evening air as a spike of cold down my spine. I drew Reed and Lucy’s attention with a gesture to the door.
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“You two want to go inside? We still gotta check the reservation, Lucy.”
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“You’re right,” She agreed. “Come on, Reed, let’s head in. We need to make sure everything’s sorted before everyone gets here.”
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“Hell yeah, let’s get some grub,” He followed along behind us enthusiastically. “I got the munchies, man.”
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“You’re not planning on filling up on entrees before everyone even gets here, are you?” I asked skeptically.
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“Dunno. Only one way to find out,” He grinned.
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It was roughly half an hour – as well as several platters of breadsticks, primarily dumpstered by Reed – later that the first of the invitees started to arrive. Naser and Naomi walked in through the door hand in hand, sporting a sharp blue jacket and dress that had clearly been handpicked to match each other. That could only have been Naomi’s work – even her glasses matched, starry blue rims sparkling in the restaurant’s warm orange light.
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Naser pointed us out, and Naomi immediately gave an enthusiastic wave and wide, clearly-practiced smile.
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“Hello, everyone! Are we still waiting on people?” She hadn’t even made it halfway to our table before she enthusiastically launched into her usual shtick, still leading Naser by the hand as she weaved her way over to us. I had to try hard not to tune her out, and next to me Fang was visibly struggling with the same task. “Goodness, this is a lovely little place, isn’t it? A little bit quaint but it’s got a charm all its own, doesn’t it, Naser?”
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“Yep. Place has history,” Naser replied mildly, somehow managing to sound like a paragon of patience in the face of such relentlessness. He gave us a cordial nod as he approached. “Hey Lucy, Anon. Evening, uh... Reed, wasn’t it?”
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“Yeah man, that’s me. How you going?” Reed stood up and reached out a hand to Naser.
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“Not too bad, thanks.” Naser smiled as the pair of them shook.
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Before Reed could so much as withdraw his arm after, Naomi darted forward to take his hand in both her own, smiling like a pompous old dame to go along with her over-enthusiastic shake. “Hello Reed, it’s so nice to see you out of that silly old mascot suit! I still can’t believe you wanted to wear that ridiculous thing to graduation as well as prom.”
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“Wha – Hey, I liked that costume –” Reed started to protest, but Naomi had already changed tack and turned away.
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“And it’s lovely to see you as well, Lucy and Anon! I’m so sorry I couldn’t make it to your mom’s big family dinner the other week. Do you know if she’d want to do another one soon? I’ve just been so busy, but I really want to get to know your family better!”
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“I – I don’t know, I’d have to ask her,” Lucy barely managed to field the rapid fire question as Naomi dragged Naser over and sat down next to her. Her expression was alike to someone drinking poison, telling me she dearly wanted to ask to switch seats or something, but she didn’t. Instead, she mustered herself up and put a smile on her face as she addressed Naomi on her terms. “It’s, uh – it’s nice to see you too, Naomi. Your, um... Your dress looks really pretty!”
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“Oh, thank you! I picked it out just to go with my dear Naser’s lovely jacket!” Naomi said happily, apparently able to switch between gushing and fretting and back again on a dime, and pleased as punch that Lucy was engaging with her. “I’d usually rather go for something red, but they just matched so perfectly that I had to take it.”
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“I kept trying to say we didn’t need anything so fancy just for dinner at Moe’s, but she insisted,” Naser said, rubbing the back of his neck abashedly.
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“Well, it’s a special night. It’s not every day you see people from high school again. Got to have the perfect thing to wear for an occasion like this!” She said with a saccharine smile.
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“I guess so,” Naser chuckled. “I mean, I won’t say it’s not a really nice jacket.”
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Naomi beamed him another little smile before turning away. Her eyes swept the table again, and landed on a certain pink raptor currently lazing back in his chair. Behind her pretty glasses, an almost auditorial look fell upon her face. “So, Reed... It’s been ages since I’ve seen you last. How are you keeping yourself busy these days?”
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“Man, I’ve been running my very own small business!” He answered proudly. Naomi actually looked impressed for a second, until Reed opened his mouth again. “A medical carfe dispensary, if you can believe that!”
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Her face fell perfectly flat for a comical moment as she visibly tried to gauge if he was being serious or not. “Oh, I... I see! That sounds like it’d be very interesting!”
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“Mmm-hmm. Never a dull day on the job for me, man.”
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I barely managed to hear Naomi lean in towards Naser and whisper quietly. “Is that actually legal?”
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“Course it is, bro, I’m fully licensed and certified and all that and everything!” Reed answered her perfectly conversationally. Apparently he’d managed to hear her, but hadn’t managed to notice she wasn’t actually talking to him. “Pretty impressive, right?”
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“I know I’m impressed.” I interjected.
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“Well... Yes, it’s certainly impressive,” Naomi conceded with a smile. “Running a business of your own is no mean feat after all.”
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“Right? All the paperwork and stuff,” Reed threw his arms out exasperatedly. “It’s like they never run out of bills you gotta pay or things you gotta look at. Whatever happened to good old capitalism just being good old capitalism?”
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“Uh...” Naomi visibly struggled to parse that for a moment.
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“Like, I just want to keep the place running. Just let me deal with the people and quit giving me extra stuff to do, you know what I mean?”
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“I know I do,” A new voice butted in. We all looked up to see Trish hanging just on the edge of the conversation, her usual confident little smile on her face. “Sick to death of regulations and... OHS and stuff. Like they think I don’t know what I’m doing, like they think they could do it better.”
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“Right?” Reed didn’t miss a beat, as if he’d expected her to be there at exactly that moment. “Big fat wastes of time.”
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“How long have you been there?” I asked.
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“About ten seconds-ish.” Trish gave a casual shrug and found herself a seat at the table. “Evening, everyone. How we all going?”
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A round of return greetings followed before Naomi kept going. “Hello, Trish. Nice to see you again. Are you and Reed running your business together?”
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“What? Nah, I’ve got my own thing. I’m running a salon,” Trish answered, her tone carefully casual with the old .
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“A salon!?” Naomi squealed. Should have seen that coming, a salon was just her kind of thing. “Oh goodness, that’s amazing! Where at? I’d love to come see what you do sometime!”
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Trish seemed hesitant to talk to Naomi at first, but by degrees she picked up steam, and soon the conversation turned to Trish happily regaling Naomi with stories of customers she’d had. I tried to tune myself out of it. On the one hand it was intriguing, the two people I would have thought least likely to ever find common ground chatting away to each other. But on the other hand, they were still just talking about hairdressing and nail polish. Or horn polish as it were.
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“There was this one spinosaurus guy last week, came in wanting just a trim and a shave, you know that sort. Had mud in his hair. Like not just a bit of dirt, actual dried up mud. Told him he didn’t need a trim, he needed a fucking bath –”
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“Really? That’s disgusting! Who goes to get their hair done like that? Some people, just some people –”
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I leaned over and nudged Fang’s arm as I whispered. “Look at ‘em go. They’re like a house on fire.”
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“God, how much people change,” She snickered. “If you’d told me back then I’d ever see Trish and Naomi sitting at the same table and not stabbing each other...”
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“Well, you could have said the same to me about you and Naomi and I’d have been just as shocked,” I pointed out with a nudge.
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Lucy gave a little embarrassed laugh. “Hah. True.”
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“What are you two talking about?” Naomi asked us, head tilted curiously. Next to her, Trish had a suspcious glare on her face, like she knew exactly what we were saying.
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“Oh, nothing. So, Naser said you’ve been real busy at work lately, Naomi,” Lucy deflected effortlessly.
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“Oh, absolutely! I’m always busy, so much to do, so little time to do it,” Naomi responded as exuberantly as ever. “It’s a wonderful job, though, I love working there. The people are so friendly! Paycheck’s very nice, too. And there’s still room for advancement!”
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“What do you do, exactly?”
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“I’m a secretary at Hornberg & Hornberg’s Accounting!” She said with a proud smile. “Mostly I organize appointments, handle clients and field phone calls. With how much business the firm sees, there’s so much to do, but I keep on top of it!”
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“Wow, that sounds like a lot. It must get tiring doing so much every day. Uh, have you... ever thought of looking for something easier? You sound like Trish, overworking the hell out of herself,” Fang remarked gently. Both Naomi and Trish shot her a dubious look in response.
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“Not at all. Like I said, it’s really a wonderful job. I wouldn’t dream of quitting,” She wrung out another smile, only a little more strained than the last. “It’s a bit exhausting sometimes, but that’s to be expected at such a prestigious business. It’s still a wonderful place to work.”
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“Hola, amigos! Everyone!” A boisterous voice I hadn’t heard in years surprised us. Lucy and I looked up to see Rosa waving eagerly as she weaved between tables. Unlike everyone else I knew from Volcano High, she looked as though she’d not changed tack one whit. A familiar smile graced the orange scales of her more-matronly-than-ever face. “It’s so wonderful to see you all again! It’s been so long!”
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Stella was following along slightly behind her, bringing up the rear with somewhat less aplomb. “Hello, everyone...”
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Naomi jumped up out of her chair to greet them, enthusiastic air already returned to her. “Stella! Rosa! It’s been ages since – Hgkh!”
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Swept up as she suddenly was in a massive hug, Naomi’s sentence quickly turned into nothing more than an undignified squawk. Rosa, however, seemed not to even register her discomfort. “Naomi, I’m so happy to see you well! How have you been? I have not forgotten how hard you advocated for our gardens as council president!”
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“Can’t breathe – let go!” Naomi managed to wheeze as she struggled.
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Eventually Naomi managed to extract herself from Rosa’s embrace, gasping for breath. The amusing situation was almost enough to bring a smile to my face – Almost. But I knew that I would be next.
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“I was glad to hear I would be seeing you tonight!” Rosa beamed. “You look like you have been doing quite well! What have you been doing since we left high school?”
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“Yes, I’m doing great,” Naomi coughed out as she sat herself back down, looking slightly shellshocked. “It’s wonderful to see you too, Rosa. M-Maybe I could just catch my breath first before I tell you, though...”
​
Stella took a seat next to Trish, giving her a timid little wave. Rosa, meanwhile, was busily scanning our party for familiar faces. In my gut, I knew what was coming, and I recognized it was my turn to be put through the wringer. Deciding it would be better to just get it over with, I steeled myself and stood up from my seat. Rosa took notice immediately, her head snapping to face me in a way that reminded me uncannily of predator locating prey.
​
“An-on! Gracious me, you are tall now!” She was on me in mere moments, a terrifying strength brought to bear like an avalanche against a tree. “Why did you just disappear like you did? Stella and I both missed you!”
​
I took a deep breath as I braced for impact, and she hit me as would a wave breaking on stone. The massive force of her squeezing hug threatened to pop me open like a blood sausage.
​
“Sorry Rosa – Been deployed –” I managed to force out, barely audible over the sound of my ribcage presumably creaking inward. I wasn’t pretty invincible after all, as it turned out.
​
She let me go in short order, leaving me to suck in a deep breath as I staggered back a step. Without giving me a moment’s respite she darted forward again and grabbed my chin in one hand, holding me in place as she fixed me with a death glare to rival the time I’d trampled those flowerbeds. The years sure hadn’t done anything to dull her demeanour.
​
“Still such a foolish boy. Making such a silly decision... The army. The army! You might not have come back, did you not think of that?” She groused as she released me at last, glowering and shaking her head. “I am just glad you made it home safely.”
​
“Me too, Rosa, don’t worry about that,” I assured her as I gave myself a once over. Nope, nothing broken. Raptor Jesus be praised. “I made a promise that I’d come back. I wouldn’t break it.”
​
“It might not have been up to you, An-on, and you know it,” She chided me with a piercing look.
​
“It’s okay, Rosa,” Lucy chimed in as she rose from her chair. “He made it home okay, just like he said he would. We’re all here now, that’s what matters.”
​
“Lucy! Ohhh, I’m so glad to see you! We missed you as well!” Rosa seemed to simply flip a switch, suddenly gushing happily again as she raced over towards her. “Stella told me you would be here, I was looking forward to seeing you! How have you been?”
​
“Well, I’ve –” Lucy had barely even begun her sentence before she realized what Rosa’s open-armed approach meant for her. Her eyes widened and her pupils practically disappeared as she shrank back. “No – Wait – Please don’t –”
​
But there was no stopping the tremendous ankylosaur once she’d gotten started. It was too late too stop, too late by far.
​
No hope remained for Lucy. No salvation. No mercy.
​
“Please!”
​
​
Lucy was still rubbing her ribs and muttering under her breath half an hour later. Granted I kind of was too, but it was still funny.
​
The night progressed quickly enough. The food arrived, drinks were ordered and downed, and stories were swapped. The atmosphere at the table was quiet and mellow, conversations striking up and splitting apart with a relaxed air, blending in easily with the chatter of the restaurant at large. It was nice to be able to catch up with everyone like this at last – I’d been curious to hear where life had taken the old cereal box mascot crowd, and they seemed just as interested to catch up with each other.
​
Trish and Lucy were chatting away cordially as they usually did. Again I was struck by how quickly and how firmly they had rekindled their friendship.
​
“Did you watch the Brachidashians the other night?” Trish asked, between even bites of her vegetarian pizza. Notably, she wasn’t pigging out anywhere near as hard as she did with Lucy’s home cooking.
​
“What? No, we were practicing guitar, you were there with me last night. Also, really? You actually watch that?” Lucy laughed. “I was watching the new Allonborough documentary last week, though,”
​
A little bit apart from them, Stella and Naomi were making their own polite small talk.
​
“Stella, I heard you’re working at Volcano High now. How are the gardens doing nowadays?” Naomi asked as she worked her way through her vegan pasta, prim and proper as always.
​
“They’re as lovely as ever! They won another award last year, you know, even without Rosa there!” Stella answered happily. “I hardly get time to visit them, though... Oh well, at least I can stroll through as I’m coming in and out of work.”
​
On the other side of the table, Reed and Naser had struck up a lively conversation of their own.
​
“Yo, I should get you on as like, a consultant or something. That’d look good on the ads. ‘Certified by Dr. Naser’, man that sounds cool...” Reed chattered excitedly.
​
“I’m still not gonna be licensed for years yet but sure, why not,” Naser replied evenly, between bites of the Meateor Special he and Lucy were splitting. Well, I say splitting, but in reality she was swiping most of it. “What would I be consulting on exactly, anyway?”
​
Rosa, meanwhile, was oddly quiet, happily listening to Stella and Naomi talk about school. Just as I looked her way, she turned and caught my eye, a measured look on her face.
​
“An-on. How has life been treating you?”
​
“Since I got back home? It’s been great,” I smiled. “Being able to see Lucy again was the best moment of my life.”
​
“And before that?” She quirked an eyebrow. “Stella says it is only recently you came back.”
​
“Well, before that was service. Just... something I had to get through. I’m sure you can guess it wasn’t exactly a fun ride.” I shrugged. “I mean, I’m not gonna say it was all bad all the time, but still...”
​
“Do you have any stories you might like to tell then, An-on?” She asked curiously.
​
I considered it for a moment. Some of the guys in my squad had been pretty alright, humans and dinos alike. For all the shit – all the discomfort, the stress, the fear – there had still been some times I remembered fondly. Moments where I could just forget the shit I was in and laugh for a little bit, moments that had been so vividly reminiscent of school I’d almost thought that’s where I was again. Like we were just a bunch of retards casually hanging out after class, instead of a bunch of retards out of their depth in the middle of a warzone.
​
Lucy caught my eye as I sorted through my thoughts, concern written on her face, and stepped up to cover for me. “Uh... I don’t know if that kind of thing is exactly something for a dinner table,”
​
“No, I got something. It wasn’t all fighting, you know,” I said slowly. I appreciated her willingness to bat for me, but I had one I could tell. “It’s not real exciting, but there was this one time one of the supply trucks coming to base flipped over into a sewer drainage ditch. Guy was okay, it was just an accident, but everything in the truck ended up in the drink. Some of it could be salvaged – glad I didn’t have to do that, I’ll say that much – but some of it...”
​
“What was it?” Naser asked suddenly, to my surprise. I hadn’t even realized he was listening. “Top secret government army stuff? That’d be embarrassing to have fall in sewer water.”
​
“Nah, just really basic stuff.” I chuckled. “Ammo, utensils, cleaning supplies, that kind of stuff. And... toilet paper.”
​
The table seemed to have quieted down a little bit. People were half talking, half listening now.
​
“Anyway, not a terribly big deal. The supply’s mostly written off, everything keeps going. People started getting stingy about toiletries and stuff and rationed the toilet paper so it’d last till next resupply. Next supply truck comes around, and... no paper. Now I bet you can see where this is going to go,”
​
“Not sure I want to,” Lucy looked both amused and disgusted, a sentiment shared by the rest of the table listening.
​
“It pretty much all went to shit, no pun intended. They tried to requisition more from other depots but it was all gonna take too long to arrive. Some people got the word out and tried to get people to smuggle it in. Other guys traded stuff with people in the nearby village just to have any paper at all while other people, uh... didn’t even bother.”
​
“Disgusting!” Rosa cringed away, eyes scrunched shut. “An-on, tell me you did not...”
​
“No, no, I didn’t. There were a couple guys I know actually stole some from the base’s store, and hid it in little stashes so they could have some no matter what... And then they started selling it. Well – I say selling, but it was more like highway robbery. Or extortion.” I sighed. “I didn’t have a choice, though. I had to.”
​
“Ouch. How much they charge, man?” Reed asked, tone somewhere between sympathetic and professionally curious.
​
“Five bucks for a roll. Ten bucks. Twenty bucks. Fifty. Whatever they thought they could sting you for,” I shook my head. “People started hating them before long. Started stealing it off them and selling it back at even crazier prices. There were almost like... little TP cartels formed over it, all over the base. If it’d gone on any longer it would have probably turned into a whole little civil war. Over toilet paper.”
​
“Over toilet paper?” Both Lucy and Rosa asked disbelievingly.
​
“Over toilet paper.” I confirmed.
​
“God, you almost make it sound like it was just a bunch of kids on a camping trip like that,” Lucy laughed. Rosa echoed her sentiment with an incredulous shake of her head.
​
I guess I kind of did, when I thought about it. It obviously wasn’t, but if you’d only heard that story, you might think it was. It was the first time I’d actually told it to anyone – not even Lucy had heard it before. To be honest with myself, I don’t even know why I did, except that I guess I felt an obligation to entertain since I was the one who’d invited everyone there. I’d thought it would hurt more to revisit any of those memories, even happy ones, but... it hadn’t, really.
​
I shook my head gently as I realized that. Maybe I’d moved past it better than I thought I had.
​
Seemed like Lucy and Trish weren’t the only ones able to get themselves scared of nothing.
​
​
As everyone finished their food and the night started to wind down, Lucy and Trish finally decided the time was right to make their move.
​
“Hey, everyone? You remember that little band me, Trish and Reed made in high school?” She stood herself up out of her chair and picked up her guitar case from where she’d stashed it near our table.
​
Trish followed suit, grabbing her bass out of its case with enthusiasm. “Me and Lucy wanted to play something for you guys. Just if you want to listen,”
​
“Play Wonderwall!” Reed hollered.
​
Trish turned to reprehend him immediately. “Shut up Reed, that song sucks. It’s always sucked.”
​
“I like it. I’ll play it afterwards, Reed,” Lucy piped up, a little grin on her face.
​
“If you play Wonderwall, I’ll kill either myself or everyone else in this building. Or both.” Trish declared, pointing her fingers warningly first at her own eyes then at Lucy’s.
​
“Alright, alright, sorry Trish,” Lucy laughed, before looking back out at everyone with a keen smile. “Anyway, we’ve been practicing together all week. It’s nothing crazy, but we think it sounds nice. Anyone want to hear it?”
​
“Yeah, I do,” Naser answered first, his interest visibly piqued. “I never got to go to that big concert you guys did at Moe’s.”
​
The rest of our motley crew joined him in a chorus of affirmatives, an air of interested curiosity taking over the table. Conversations died out completely as Trish and Lucy hefted their instruments and stood together near their seats.
​
The two of them shared a reassuring look and a nod. Lucy closed her eyes and started strumming. The first few bars were soft and slow, her tail gently wagging and her head bobbing along in time.
​
Every time I saw her playing again, my heart swelled. Gone was the reluctance to so much as sit in front of a piano, replaced with the proud happiness that had used to shine through on her face when she’d bared her soul to the world. She made no pretense now that the music wasn’t a part of her, the song a solemn admission that there was a part of her that she yet yearned to show the world.
​
Trish kicked in with her bass, a steady undercurrent that drove the pace of their song, and together she and Lucy sang. They spoke no words, only hummed in concert to carry over their instruments, adding their voices to the music. Trish’s carefully modulated singing backed up Lucy’s choir-like tone, the pair of them working in unison again as though they’d simply never stopped. I doubted that anybody who listened to them could have ever guessed the friction that had been between them before.
​
Despite that I knew it as something they’d hashed together in a week, it felt like a complete song in its own right. Without a doubt it was a change from VVurm Drama’s old repertoire, but all the more appealing even so. Everyone else at the table was listening raptly, almost entranced by the music. I had to wonder how Reed’s drums might have fit in. I looked over to see him nodding along with the beat of the song, clearly imagining the same thing himself with an appreciative little smile on his face.
​
At length they finished with a flourish, and raised their eyes up from their instruments in unison. This time I didn’t have to lead anyone in a round of applause; it was given almost immediately, with even a few people from neighbouring tables joining in. None of us had even noticed them listening, but with the song finished we could now hear the quiet that had fallen around us while Trish and Lucy played.
​
“That was really lovely!” Naomi cheered. “Now I really wish I could have heard your band play back in school!”
​
“They didn’t play this kind of stuff back then. This was way better, though!” Stella pointed out as she clapped. I saw Lucy cringe slightly at the reminder.
​
“Hey, thanks, everyone. Glad you liked it,” She put on a smile nonetheless and waved her gratitude to both her expected and unexpected audiences with a sheepish smile.
​
“Man, that was great. I gotta get back to practicing drums, I want to play with you guys again now,” Reed said, almost envious in tone. “So what’d you call it? That song?”
​
“Uhh... Haven’t really thought of a name, to be honest,” Lucy glanced over at Trish, who just shrugged in response. “It was just something we played.”
​
“What!? Every song needs a good name,” Reed gasped, as though grand sacrilege had just been committed before his eyes. “Man. You guys are like, lost without me.”
​
Lucy just shook her head bemusedly as she and Trish put their instruments away. Just as she was about to click the case shut, though, she suddenly looked up at me, a pensive expression on her face. There was a note of indecision in her eyes, as though she was debating with herself on whether she wanted to say something or not.
​
Finally she seemed to make a call, hesitantly bringing her gaze back up to the table. “Actually... I got another little thing I wanted to play for you guys. Me and Anon wrote it together, back in high school. You want to hear it?”
​
A half a dozen voices cried out another round of affirmatives, and Lucy suddenly had to visibly try to keep her eagerness contained at the response. With a cool composure as she grabbed her guitar up again and stood straight before the little crowd. She plucked at the strings carefully for a few moments before nodding, seemingly satisfied with her measurements.
​
She drew in a fortifying breath as she looked up to face us again. “Alright. I hope you guys like it,”
​
The familiar melancholy melody filled the air as Lucy started strumming gently, even slower than before. In absence of Trish’s bass backing her up she played a touch louder to ensure the song kept its weight, each note reverberating through the area around us. It worked – as before, everyone at the table was listening raptly.
​
I had to admit that without Trish’s bass, the music almost felt... less like a complete song than when they had played together. I supposed it made sense – there just wasn’t as much to listen to. But in truth it wasn’t just a song. It wasn’t something that had been constructed formulaically to be measured scientifically, it was a story told from the bottom of her heart.
​
Nobody could deny the soul on display before them, channelled into the music for all to hear, in spite of its comparative quiet. Lucy spoke silently of turmoil endured and hardships survived – survived, and ultimately overcome – and everyone we’d known back then heard it now. I don’t know if they necessarily understood, but they heard it. Heads downcast and brows furrowed in thought, or eyes wide open as outpoured emotion flowed over them, they heard it now.
​
If not for the motions of her arms, Lucy might have been mistaken for a stone-still statue, caught in her memories as she played on our collective heartstrings. It was the first time she’d shared that song with anyone else. Only she and I had ever heard it before. Some small, unreasonable part of me wanted to be jealous that it was no longer a secret we shared, but I quashed that thought vehemently.
​
It was still as beautiful as ever, and something as beautiful as that deserved to be heard, deserved to be witnessed by the world. Lucy – and her music – deserved an audience.
​
Even if only a small one.
​
The song finished, and the last note faded away. Lucy looked up, her smile somewhat faint as she anxiously awaited the table’s responses.
​
“I don’t know much about music, Lucy. I dunno how to say how that one made me feel,” Naser said, his voice barely above a whisper. “But that sounded beautiful.”
​
A current of quiet agreement ran around the table. Lucy murmured a heartfelt ‘thank you’ and turned away to grab her guitar case, hiding her vulnerable smile. Once again my heart felt too big for my chest. She’d been so afraid once before, but here she stood embracing all she’d once turned away from.
​
​
When Naser and Naomi decided to say goodnight and drive home, that basically marked the end of it. Rosa decided it was time for her to leave shortly afterward, and Stella had to follow her ride home. The rest of us decided to call it as well, and Lucy and I went off to settle the bill as the rest of the motley old crew meandered off outside.
​
I hardly even wanted to speak of the absurd number on the account as we left the restaurant to join them. “If we do this again, next time, everyone’s paying for their own food.”
​
Lucy, seeming slightly shellshocked herself, only nodded as we made our way out into the cold evening air. The dark of the onsetting night was only broken by the pale streetlights and the few other establishments still open around the plaza.
​
Stella and Rosa were still hanging around, quietly conversing with Trish. Reed, meanwhile, was waiting alone some distance away. He caught sight of us and immediately waved us over, looking unfittingly somber.
​
“Hey. Trish just said she wanted a moment to talk to those guys,” He explained quietly.
​
“What about?” I asked, glancing curiously over at them. Now that I looked, Trish seemed to be acting oddly meek, presenting an even smaller figure than usual with her head downcast.
​
“... Said she wanted to say sorry,” Reed grimaced with a quick look towards Lucy.
​
“For what?”
​
“For prom, I imagine,” Lucy said, the tiniest mote of grim bitterness in her voice. It was dispelled just as fast as it came with a sigh, however. “For getting them involved.”
​
“Yeah, I... Man, I really should say sorry, too,” Reed said, nerves now audibly entering his voice. “Not for prom, but for like... All that shit she did, to both you guys, it wasn’t her fault. Not entirely, anyway. I went along with it all when I shouldn’t have ‘cause I didn’t realize how hung up on it she was getting, but just... She didn’t mean to, you know?”
​
“Reed, like I said before – it’s alright. I know. I don’t blame Trish anymore.” Lucy said simply, with a pensive shake of her head.
​
“Oh.” Reed dropped his gaze to the floor. “Do you, like... Do you blame me, then?”
​
“What? No,” She looked at him strangely. “Of course not.”
​
Now he just looked confused. “... Yourself?”
​
“No, Reed. I don’t blame anyone.” She said emphatically, waving her hand as though it should have been obvious to him. “There’s no-one to blame. It was just dumb teenagers making dumb teenager mistakes. I only wish I realized it back then, you know? But I can’t blame myself, either, because I was just a dumb teenager too.”
​
Reed almost looked a bit put out, but he seemed to concede the point with a helpless little shrug. “I mean... You're not wrong, I guess. But, like... It feels a bit wrong to say we were just dumb...”
​
“Well, we sort of were. We all did the best we could with what we had back then, but we still just were what we were.” I echoed a thought I’d had before.
​
“Exactly. No shame in calling it what it was,” Lucy shrugged. “All we can do is show the world that we can do a bit better this time around. It was just mistakes, right? Not the end of the world, unless we let it be.”
​
Again his expression became one of consternation for a moment as he looked away, rubbing the back of his head. “I... guess so. I still just wish I’d done a bit better, you know?”
​
“I think we all do,” I commiserated. “But we made it here alright. Sometimes that’s all you can ask for.”
​
“That last year at school could have gone a lot better,” Lucy admitted. “But it could have gone a lot worse, too. I’m still getting used to some things a little bit now, and I’m still making some mistakes, but nothing as bad as before. And I’ve learned a lot since then.”
​
“Like what?” Reed asked curiously.
​
“Well, I know... I know who I am now, do you know what I mean? I got so stupid in my last year at high school because it felt like everything I did just went wrong,” She said quietly. “I thought that meant I was a bad person, I thought I had to be somebody completely different. Who I wanted to be and who I was... just got too far apart from each other. Way too far.”
​
“And that’s my fault,” Trish’s morose voice cut in. Without any of us noticing, she and the others had apparently tied up their conversation and come over to join us, Stella and Rosa both following along a bit behind her.
​
“No, it’s not, Trish,” Lucy recovered quickly, rebuffing her insistently. “It’s not anybody’s fault. We all did dumb shit, that’s normal when you’re a kid. Sure it’s easy to look back and go ‘Oh I should have done this’ or ‘I wish I’d been smart enough to do that’, but how could any of us have actually known back then? It’s not anybody’s fault that we made dumb, stupid mistakes. It doesn’t need to be anyone’s fault, you know? It’s just something that happens.”
​
“I still just feel so bad, Lucy,” Trish said quietly, refusing to look directly at her. “I know you said it doesn’t matter now, but all that shit I did... For years. Years of your life, I was trying to fuck it up...”
​
“No, you weren’t. You were trying to help,” Lucy put her hands on Trish’s shoulders, forcing the tiny triceratops to look up at her with watering eyes. “You were hurting, too. I didn’t get that back then, but I get it now. You were just trying to help me, not hurt me, and I should have realized.”
​
Quietly I reflected that I probably should have, too. Lucy was pretty much my whole world, then – hell, she still is now. But I’d almost let myself forget that people besides her existed, and had feelings of their own. Trish might have been the biggest bitch I’d known back then, but she’d had reasons to be. That didn’t excuse what she’d done, but it explained it, and that was the kind of thing that could take you from enmity to empathy – if you let it. Bitterness had less room to fester where understanding took root.
​
I’d realized that perhaps a bit too late to be happy with. Lucy, even later. But just like she said, we couldn’t go back in time and tell ourselves that. It would sure make life easier if we could, but it wasn’t going to happen. All of us had done the best we could. Moving on would be something we did for a while, maybe forever, but as long as we kept doing it, I knew we’d be fine.
​
“Lucy,” Stella broke the silence that had fallen with an air of timid awkwardness. Trish and Lucy both turned their gaze to her. “Uh, Rosa and I were about to head back home... Do you mind if I get your number? So we can talk again? I’d like to talk to you guys still after this...”
​
“Sure,” She fumbled in her dress’s pocket for a moment to find her phone. “We can talk on rockbook too, if you like. Oh yeah – Reed, Rosa, can I get your numbers as well?”
​
After everyone had swapped numbers, we said our farewells. Rosa sent us off with another round of spine-snapping hugs, while Stella gave a comparatively less confident wave goodbye as she left. Trish gave a heartfelt promise to call tomorrow as she bid us goodnight, and Reed assured us he’d message us both before blazing his trademark finger guns one last time for the night.
​
At last, that left Lucy and I as the only ones remaining. She grabbed her guitar case up with one hand and linked her other up with mine, and we began the long walk back to our car. We walked a lot slower this time compared to when we were arriving, our energy having been thoroughly drained over the hours.
​
“Well, that was a pretty nice night, wasn’t it?” Lucy spoke up with a little smile. “I was surprised how much they liked that song Trish and I made, considering we only spent a week on it. I almost missed my notes a few times.”
​
“I didn’t even notice,” I said honestly. “I’m not surprised they liked it at all, though. You always play beautifully.”
​
“Thank you, Anon,” She murmured. “I still feel a little nervous playing in front of people like that. It’s not quite the same as playing for choir, or a concert.”
​
“You did well, though. I’m glad you’re playing again.”
​
Another small, grateful smile graced her face, but her expression took on a look of introspection as she looked away again. “Hey... Do you remember how you said I shouldn’t have stopped playing?”
​
“Yeah.” Even now I still remember the surprise I’d felt when I returned, learning she’d just left her music behind.
​
“I want to say you were right, but... I think I had to. I wasn’t tough enough back then. I couldn’t take it. I needed to get away from it all,” She gave a small sigh and a shrug. “It wasn’t the best time of my life, but it gave me time I needed to get stuff figured out. I’m not Fang. Fang’s not... me. Not me anymore. Fang wasn’t... a good person, really.”
​
“I thought she was,” I piped up.
​
“I’m talking objectively, here,” Lucy insisted. “Fang wasn’t smart. At all. Fang wasn’t very nice to a lot of people, not even you at first. And Fang wasn’t tough enough to take anything without running to someone for help.”
​
“There’s nothing wrong with needing help –”
​
“I don’t want to be Fang anymore.” Lucy said firmly. “But... Don’t get me wrong, I’m still happy that I was for a little while, even if I was edgy as hell. I’ll never forget what she – er, they did for me, even if it was mostly on accident. Fang didn’t come from a good place, but they were good in the end. I didn’t get it before, but I get... there were things I should have learned earlier. Things Fang wanted to teach me. You wanted to teach me. About myself. About everyone else.”
​
“Like what?” It sounded like she’d given this a lot of thought. I wondered how much time she’d spent pondering on it when she was away in her head.
​
“Like that I am good enough. Like that I really can make it work on my own if I just try. I know you’ve tried to tell me that before, but I... I don’t know why it took me so long to get,” She whispered. “And that I’ve got people I can trust. If I’d just had the guts to talk to Trish, I’d have realized that. She’s one of them. And obviously you are, and my family, and... me.”
​
She drew in a nervous breath, and I gave her hand a squeeze in an effort to reassure her. She looked up at the black sky for a moment before coming back down to earth.
​
“And most importantly... I won’t be Fang, but... I’m gonna try to carry a bit of them with me if I can. Try to be the best of Fang.” She paused for a moment, then gave a quietly amused snort. “Well, that still sounds kinda dumb when I say it out loud. But you get what I mean, right?”
​
“I do,” We shared another laugh. “Just like I said before, I’d love to see it, Lucy. That’s certainly a change from calling Fang ‘that thing’ like you did before I left.”
​
She gave a little shrug, and a nod of concession. “Yeah, I suppose it is... Still gonna wingslap you if you keep calling me Fang, though, don’t think I won’t.”
​
I laughed along with her as she planted a playful poke into my side. “Is that going to be a thing going forwards now? ‘Wingslaps’?”
​
“Why not? Sounds good to me,” She leaned back into my side, still snickering.
​
As we finally reached our little old car I unlocked it quickly, eager to get out of the chill, and Lucy carefully placed her guitar on the backseat before hopping in the passenger seat. For a while we we were both quiet as I drove home.
​
It had been nice to see that the old crowd were all doing well. Most of them I’d seen semi-recently, of course, but I’d not talked to Rosa or Reed in a long time, and it was nice to know they were alright. The night going off without a hitch was everything I’d hoped for; it had shown Lucy and I that everyone was able to put the past behind them. Lucy herself had shown that off especially, happy to not only see people from school again, but to share her music with them... The thought filled me with bolstering confidence that we were, in fact, going to be just fine.
​
Thankfully, it seemed like that was a feeling that was becoming more and more common in my life lately.
​
I pulled my eyes off the road for a moment to glance at Lucy. She was leaning back quietly, eyes half closed, almost appearing asleep, but she caught my gaze with a flick of her own amber eyes.
​
“Eyes on the road, Anon. Rather not die in a car accident, thanks,” She chastised me bemusedly. She definitely sounded half-asleep. In fact she sounded as if she could drift off at any moment.
​
“Sorry. Was just wondering if you were asleep,” I laughed.
​
“Nah. I’m tired, but not that tired,” She shuffled in her seat slightly. “Was just thinking a bit.”
​
“What about?”
​
“Ahh, just more dumb-sounding stuff,” She chuckled. “Seeing everyone from back then again... It just made me think, is all.”
​
Good thing I was never not eager to pick her brain. “Anything you want to share?”
​
She considered it for a moment, seeming to rouse herself up before she started talking. “Well... I’ve been thinking about what might make me happy. For a while – well, maybe more like my whole life, actually – I’ve just been doing what makes other people happy. Trish, mom... even you, kind of. I gotta figure out... me. You know? You make me happy, obviously, but besides you... I think there’s something I want to do myself.”
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I nodded slowly, remembering myself saying something similar a while ago. “What’s that?”
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“Well... I know I say nobody could go back and tell us that we were being stupid, but even so, what if somebody had?” She said, the sleep now absent from her voice as she spoke with intent. “I keep thinking like, if only someone had come along and told me and Trish how dumb we were being back then, what would have changed? Everything could have been so much better. As it was, I was lucky you came along when you did, Anon.”
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“I didn’t even do that much, you know...” I shrugged.
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“Yeah, you did, don’t go getting all humble,” Lucy waved a finger at me. “But that’s not what I’m getting at anyway. What I’m saying is... Maybe you’re onto something with that music teacher idea. I mean, as a teacher, maybe I could help kids having the same problems me and Trish did. Maybe it doesn’t need to be as painful for them as it was for us, you know? Just someone being there to say the right thing at the right time... Just like you did for me, Anon. It might make a world of difference to some poor kid some day.”
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I thought about it for a moment. I hadn’t even considered that, back when I’d first suggested it to her. I’d thought only of how proficient she was at both music and teaching, but she was right – that was something that would be right up her alley.
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“That’s a really good idea, Lucy.” I nodded. “Hey, maybe you could replace old Mr. Jingo. God knows he never got around to doing much teaching.”
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“Maybe. We’ll see,” She chuckled quietly. “I’ll say this much, though... If we’re ever parents, Anon, I swear I’m going to make sure my kid never makes the same mistakes I did. Man, I did way too much dumb stuff back then...”
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I wanted to remind her that we all had, but I had the feeling she knew that just as well as me. Reed, Trish, Naomi and Naser – everyone had their own problems. Everyone had been fighting their own battles. Still were, really. That simple phrase I’d once dismissed as nothing more than a dumb epithet from my old principal... I’d learned the truth of it a bit too late, I supposed, to have understood the pain Trish was going through. I’d only seen the pain Lucy was going through, without considering where it came from.
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But I got it now. I’d gotten there in the end. We all had, in our own ways.
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Lucy’s voice jolted me back out of my thoughts, pulling me out of the autopilot I’d settled into. The streetlights illuminating the quiet city night suddenly seemed a little brighter now I focused.
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“Speaking of, I’ve been meaning to ask you... How do you feel about kids, anyway?”