~Note: this runs parallel to Testostrogen, taking place in the same universe~
Julie Emma Krooby and Miranda Leane Tucker
in
Joomer, Volume 1
Chapter 5
Bloody Pizza
by the kzx
“That way," Jules continued, "when I got up to the counter, I already had that stance; I just had to move my other leg like... this..." she illustrated, showing off before Miranda an adorable pose where her hips jutted out from her side and she had her finger up to her lips, "and he was putty in my paws." Jules had been explaining her flirting techniques to Miranda while they rode the monorail to the northern-most portion of Tavindale, where Audrey lived. A strange-looking lion couple across from the girls gave off confused and disapproving glances. They looked very wealthy; too wealthy to be riding a typical monorail, however Miranda and Jules were on their way up a bit on Mt. Dromedary, which Miranda knew to be fairly wealthy.
"See, Carlton, this is why I hate public transportation!" The woman said off to the side to her husband, not keeping her voice down, of course.
"Mmm hmmm, yes, I see, Jasmine. Ruffian children." The husband said with a smirk. Miranda felt at once that these were rude people. Jules turned to them at once.
"Psst, I'm thirsty; either a'ya gotta big black cock?" She said casually. The couple, as well as Miranda, covered their mouths in shock, staring with wide eyes. The lions got up and walked away in a huff.
"Unbelievable, the youth today!" The male said.
"Well! I never!" The female practically yelled. Jules did a small curtsy at them and sat back down next to Miranda.
"Ha! I guess they've never had a big black cock!" She said. Miranda still blushed, holding her mouth. Jules smirked. "Randa, it's a slang word for a big cola bottle in the U.K., didn'tcha know?" Miranda relaxed, looking at her crush with both confusion and admiration. Jules sat back. “Figured they’d at least know, if they were REALLY British.” This adoration did not come easy at times, and Miranda felt that despite all her beauty, Jules Krooby was still quite a pawful. At least she was never boring. Miranda looked at Jules. A moment of silence, inaction. Alone. Do something, girl. Say something!
"Hey, uh, those, um, those flirting tips y-you showed me..." she started, prompting Jules to sit up, full attention.
"Uh huuuuuuuh...?" She replied. Miranda looked away, clearing her throat.
"It works good on guys, huh?" Miranda said.
"Sure does! Worked on that JuiceBerry guy, worked on a guy at JustMart. Even if these guys would never do anything with a girl my age--well," she paused, "most wouldn't..." she finished, dreamy eyes.
"So, about flirting..." Miranda asked, "what, um... what works on you?" Where was she going with this? Jules rolled her eyes with a goofy smile and maybe a blush.
"Weellllllll..." the kangaroo girl started, "I like things that are fun. Fun fun fun!" She said, standing up again, "And fun doesn't have to be sex! It could be any craziness, especially stuff I never saw coming!" Jules said, wide eyes, arms out. Miranda was prepared to take mental notes, but was instead severely discouraged. Fun? Surprises? Craziness? The list seemed impossibly high, full of impossible tasks for Miranda to check off. How was she ever hoping to win Jules' heart?
"Do you... do ya like fat guys?" Miranda asked. Jules rolled her eyes toward her friend.
"I'm not dating your brother." She said, taking Miranda by surprise.
"Huh? N-no-"
"He's an asshole, if you don't mind me saying." Jules said.
"No, no, he is, he is." Miranda stammered, looking down, wanting to just drop the subject. The intercom tone sounded:
NEXT STOP: MT. DROMEDARY, TAVINDALE. MT. DROMEDARY, TAVINDALE.
Jules' ear twitched and she smiled, kneeling on a window seat, looking out. Miranda walked over to see Jules pressing her face against the glass, making faces.
"What're you doing?" Miranda asked, watching the glass fog up.
"Maybe those lions'll see me and start vomiting!" She said, blowing raspberries against the surface.
"Wha...what about germs?"
"Germans?"
"No, germs."
"I don't think they were German. They sounded faux English. 'Humph! Well, I nevah!'" Jules imitated.
"No, Jules, germs, on the window." Miranda pointed out with her paw, chuckling a little. Jules followed the monkey's finger to the glass surface which had salival impressions on it, fog fading against the view of the sun setting over Sugna in the distance.
"Meh, doesn't bother me. Daddy says I gotta great immune system." She said, continuing to look out the window. Miranda thought about it; maybe she was right. There was never a time she could recall when Jules was sick. For whatever reason, this made the kangaroo girl even more endearing to her. She smiled and the train began its deceleration.
'I never imagined,' Miranda thought to herself, 'that I'd ever consider Dennis Raulston a rival.' The monkey girl sat alone on the big dark tan couch in the Raulston living room, well, one of the living rooms; the place seemed to have about 2, maybe a third one around somewhere. Miranda usually loved being there; everything was big and open and clean, total opposite from her small little home she shared with her mom and brother. Audrey and Dennis seemed to have it all. Miranda looked in the expansive kitchen where Dennis, Jules, Tay and Cotter were having some sort of 'disgusting drink' competition. It was making a huge mess of the lovely countertops.
No matter how many times she came over there, Miranda continued to be amazed at how big the place was, how high the ceilings were, even over the kitchen. The multi-tiered living room, leading to possibly another living room, had cascading carpeted steps leading to wide open hardwood flooring. The entire place had a strong southwestern theme, wrought-iron decorations and many, many family pictures of all 5 Raulstons: Parents, Emmett and Clara; eldest son, Everett; next son, Dennis; and their daughter, Audrey. Yep, Dennis and Audrey had everything.
"What in the... Dennis!" a female country accent yelled. Miranda saw Audrey, having come around the corner and seeing what the 4 kids were doing. "Dennis, Mom ‘n Dad'll get mad if they see their kitchen like this!" She wandered along the edge of the mess, not wanting to step in it. Dennis laughed loudly.
"Ahhh, it'll be fine, Aud! We'll clean it up! Try this stuff! It's fuckin' awesome!" Dennis exclaimed, holding out a glass which had a questionable foamy purple liquid sloshing around in it. Audrey eyed it with a sick suspicion.
“Ah don’t even think so!” she said, shoving it away from her and walking away, pulling out her phone. Tay came rumbling back to the sitting area tangled with Cotter in some sort of wrestling match. Miranda moved her feet, allowing the boy-bundle to pass by. There were actual, um, punches being thrown, right into each other’s faces.
“Oh, my god, are you guys fighting?!” Miranda yelped. Tay, on top of Cotter, smacked the otter boy in the arm and looked up.
“Nah, we’re just killin’ each other!” he said, a fist flying up and hitting him in the jaw. The duo rolled over and Cotter stood up, kicking the now grounded Tay.
“It’s fun! Wanna jump in?” Cotter said, breathing heavily, big goofy smile. Miranda held a paw up, declining. The boys separated, catching their breath on the floor.
Earlier, Tay, Cotter and Dennis were sliding around down the slope on the side of the property as it was completely covered in snow from the two nights prior. They were doing that when Miranda and Jules arrived. Soon after arriving, however, Jules immediately threw herself into that situation, seemingly ignoring Miranda and romping with the boys. Miranda didn’t know what to do with herself, standing around awkwardly, not wanting to roll around in the snow... unless it was with Jules and only Jules.
“Say, you guys hungry?” Audrey asked from the side. Miranda nodded. “Well, we got some pizza if you guys want. Help yourself.” She said, ducking back inside and disappearing altogether. Miranda didn’t see her until the kitchen mess. After standing around outside for so long, Miranda finally went inside and sat on the big comfy couch. She stared at the TV, which was paused on some video game the group had been playing before they went outside. Miranda couldn’t recognize it, but there was lots of blood and bodies flying around, something the 3 boys were sure fans of, Miranda thought. Miranda went to the kitchen and helped herself to a few slices, sitting back down in the couch that enveloped anyone sitting in it. As she ate, she reflected on how, despite being sickly rich, Audrey’s parents were really cool. They let anyone eat on the couch! Miranda wouldn’t have expected anything like that.
The sliding glass door opened to roarous laughter and a snow covered Jules threw herself in, grabbing some pizza and plopping down next to Miranda, eating and looking at the screen, breathing hard through her nose.
“What kinda bloody...” she started, mouth full of pizza and squinting at the screen. “Ahh, it’s that game, okay.” She continued to eat silently. Miranda tried eating as well, but couldn’t. The couch was very wide and very big and at the moment there were only 2 girls sitting in it. And where Jules had chosen to sit was RIGHT up and next to Miranda. How COULD she possibly eat?!
“Er, um, Jules.” Miranda squeaked.
“Yeah?” the kangaroo asked, looking at her very close companion.
“Um,” Miranda started, but didn’t know what to say! What was she gonna ask? What was it?! She had Jules full attention! Right then! “Er, uh, n-nevermind...” Miranda said, hunching over and eating slowly, hair falling in her face. They ate silently. Miranda’s heart fluttered, wanting Jules so bad, but unsure about everything else surrounding that concept. Soon, however, Jules finished and got up, asking Miranda to join them outside. Miranda declined and Jules left. Once again, Miranda was alone. She reflected on her crush. Jules, what a girl. Now outside playing with the boys.
The boys were all kinda cute, too. Tay was especially a cutie, and one Miranda crushed on for years after first meeting the twins. Cotter was cute, too, though he never seemed to really pay Miranda any attention and she never really crushed on him. Dennis, however, was a boy Miranda never really had a thing for. Sure, he was attractive, but he wasn’t Cotter, or Tay.
Or Jules. Not even the same gender, Miranda thought, but still, attractiveness didn’t seem to have lines to her. Maybe she just wanted someone to hold her, kiss her, tell her she’s beautiful. This kind of thinking, though, made Miranda sick. It's not that she wanted attention, really... just... someone to be special with. Someone like Jules. Miranda's attraction to Jules was special, though. There was something about the kangaroo girl that made Miranda’s heart flutter and her paws shake. Was it that smile? That knowing smile that always seemed to know something about you?
That was all a while ago, Miranda thought. How long had they been there already? The two beaten boys on the floor got up and unpaused the game, continuing whatever they were playing. Miranda looked around at the scene: Audrey was texting, sitting in a corner chair near the kitchen; Tay and Cotter were playing a violent video game, making all sorts of noise; in the kitchen, Jules and Denni- Miranda’s heart went cold. They were kissing. Oh, god... Audrey and Dennis had everything--including Jules.",
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