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It took a long time to even think of being pregnant again, let alone to try again with her husband Walter. Her eyes traced down to the pink line right above her pubic fur, a thin shadow of the large C-Section she had to safely deliver her son into the world. Her ears flicked as she saw flashes - the sight of white sheets, the grey foam on the squat bar, gazing down over her own bosom at her heaving, laboring belly. She could remember the feeling of her paws with a death-grip on that steel bar, her foot on the base of it - whatever it took, the sweat, the desperation. Her palms got sweaty as she tumbled down her own rabbit hole - a shrill, painful cry faded in from yesteryear, a voice she recognized as her own. Her husband looking into her eyes, but his lips delivered no words - she watched the small male midwife swiftly assessed her, looking over to the monitor, a small box strapped to her right thigh, leads leading up her leg to unmentionable places...she almost forgot about them, except now it told of trouble. Earlier trouble earned her a transfer from The Burrows birth center to MeadowBridge... and now it earned her the direct attention of a large brown bear named Dr. Davis. When she arrived, he was wearing a white coat - a coat that was now in his locker, no doubt. Replacing it, a green pair of surgical scrubs and a surgical bonnet - a wardrobe change for her.\n\nBlue eyes, beautiful blue eyes...Not her husband's, Walter's eyes were earthy brown like hers, but they belonged to her midwife. Waltman, she looked into his eyes, as he gazed back - his mouth moving but the words didn't make sense. It wasn't silence, she heard the fetal monitor alarm sounding - the unsettling type of alarm. She heard the words 'baby in danger' and 'we need to get it done' as the waking nightmare continued. It was like her brain was stuck in slow recall...the voices echoing to her over a chasm that she could not transverse.\n\nA voice whimpered from the abyss, \"Help my baby...\" before it blurred to a mask being placed over her face, a doctor saying she needed to go down, she couldn't be awake. It blurred to grey, before...\n\n...those blue eyes, blue eyes and soft voice. It happened. It happened and she didn't remember anything. She cried, and he dried her tears. Maybe it was her husband, but she remembered Waltman's eyes - his voice....\n\nIt wasn't meant to be that hard, it wasn't supposed to all go wrong, but it did go wrong.\n\n\"You have a healthy baby, that's all that counts\" and \"You wish you could have pushed him out? That's just dumb,\" made her mind spin, \"Couldn't you have just done a bit more? He was nearly there\" and \"You got the easy way out, they just cut him...\" drove her to a support group, a counselor. Five women talking about the best and worst day of their lives, motherhood and emotional meltdowns in a group of ladies with scars that told the tale of modern surgical obstetrics.\n\nShe snapped back to the present as she softly touched the scar with her fingers, It took a lot of healing, but if it was one thing she learned - it was that hope had to win over fear. This time could be different, but the motto remained - Hope Over Fear.\n\n-- End of Story Snippet --\n\n© 2012-2023 R.J. Dobbs as registered with the US Copyright Office. Duplication or use of this material without express permission is prohibited except as permitted by law","description_bbcode_parsed":"<span style='word-wrap: break-word;'>A digital commission from Oli Snowpaw of Janet, a mother from Waltman&#039;s Women.<br /><br />-- Start Story Snippet --<br /><br />Janet waddle-walked over to the mirror, looking at her belly. It took a long time to even think of being pregnant again, let alone to try again with her husband Walter. Her eyes traced down to the pink line right above her pubic fur, a thin shadow of the large C-Section she had to safely deliver her son into the world. Her ears flicked as she saw flashes - the sight of white sheets, the grey foam on the squat bar, gazing down over her own bosom at her heaving, laboring belly. She could remember the feeling of her paws with a death-grip on that steel bar, her foot on the base of it - whatever it took, the sweat, the desperation. Her palms got sweaty as she tumbled down her own rabbit hole - a shrill, painful cry faded in from yesteryear, a voice she recognized as her own. Her husband looking into her eyes, but his lips delivered no words - she watched the small male midwife swiftly assessed her, looking over to the monitor, a small box strapped to her right thigh, leads leading up her leg to unmentionable places...she almost forgot about them, except now it told of trouble. Earlier trouble earned her a transfer from The Burrows birth center to MeadowBridge... and now it earned her the direct attention of a large brown bear named Dr. Davis. When she arrived, he was wearing a white coat - a coat that was now in his locker, no doubt. Replacing it, a green pair of surgical scrubs and a surgical bonnet - a wardrobe change for her.<br /><br />Blue eyes, beautiful blue eyes...Not her husband&#039;s, Walter&#039;s eyes were earthy brown like hers, but they belonged to her midwife. Waltman, she looked into his eyes, as he gazed back - his mouth moving but the words didn&#039;t make sense. It wasn&#039;t silence, she heard the fetal monitor alarm sounding - the unsettling type of alarm. She heard the words &#039;baby in danger&#039; and &#039;we need to get it done&#039; as the waking nightmare continued. It was like her brain was stuck in slow recall...the voices echoing to her over a chasm that she could not transverse.<br /><br />A voice whimpered from the abyss, &quot;Help my baby...&quot; before it blurred to a mask being placed over her face, a doctor saying she needed to go down, she couldn&#039;t be awake. It blurred to grey, before...<br /><br />...those blue eyes, blue eyes and soft voice. It happened. It happened and she didn&#039;t remember anything. She cried, and he dried her tears. Maybe it was her husband, but she remembered Waltman&#039;s eyes - his voice....<br /><br />It wasn&#039;t meant to be that hard, it wasn&#039;t supposed to all go wrong, but it did go wrong.<br /><br />&quot;You have a healthy baby, that&#039;s all that counts&quot; and &quot;You wish you could have pushed him out? That&#039;s just dumb,&quot; made her mind spin, &quot;Couldn&#039;t you have just done a bit more? He was nearly there&quot; and &quot;You got the easy way out, they just cut him...&quot; drove her to a support group, a counselor. Five women talking about the best and worst day of their lives, motherhood and emotional meltdowns in a group of ladies with scars that told the tale of modern surgical obstetrics.<br /><br />She snapped back to the present as she softly touched the scar with her fingers, It took a lot of healing, but if it was one thing she learned - it was that hope had to win over fear. This time could be different, but the motto remained - Hope Over Fear.<br /><br />-- End of Story Snippet --<br /><br />&copy; 2012-2023 R.J. Dobbs as registered with the US Copyright Office. Duplication or use of this material without express permission is prohibited except as permitted by law</span>","writing":"","writing_bbcode_parsed":"<span style='word-wrap: break-word;'></span>","pools_count":1,"title":"Oli_Snowpaw Commission - Hope Over Fear","deleted":"f","public":"t","mimetype":"image/jpeg","pagecount":"1","rating_id":"1","rating_name":"Mature","ratings":[{"content_tag_id":"2","name":"Nudity","description":"Nonsexual nudity exposing breasts or genitals (must not show arousal)","rating_id":"1"}],"submission_type_id":"1","type_name":"Picture/Pinup","guest_block":"t","friends_only":"f","comments_count":"0","views":"38"}