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  "description": "Disclaimer: The TMNT are not mine. No money being made.\nWord Count part 20: 4,296 multi-chapter 2k3\nSummary: Donatello is known as the 'go-to Turtle', the guy who can fix all sorts of things.  His role in the family takes an unexpected turn when his brothers decide to expand on his job description.\nRatings per chapter vary - R to NC-17\n~~This amazing preview image was created by the incomparable @Sherenelle \n \n!!~~Winner in the Universal TMNT Fanfiction Competition 2016: (Erotica Ballot) Sexiest Donatello 1st Place; Most Turtle-Tastic T-Cest 1st Place  ",
  "description_bbcode_parsed": "<span style='word-wrap: break-word;'>Disclaimer: The TMNT are not mine. No money being made.<br />Word Count part 20: 4,296 multi-chapter 2k3<br />Summary: Donatello is known as the &#039;go-to Turtle&#039;, the guy who can fix all sorts of things.&nbsp;&nbsp;His role in the family takes an unexpected turn when his brothers decide to expand on his job description.<br />Ratings per chapter vary - R to NC-17<br />~~This amazing preview image was created by the incomparable @Sherenelle <br />&nbsp;<br />!!~~Winner in the Universal TMNT Fanfiction Competition 2016: (Erotica Ballot) Sexiest Donatello 1st Place; Most Turtle-Tastic T-Cest 1st Place&nbsp;&nbsp;</span>",
  "writing": "\tDonatello hadn't realized he'd fallen asleep until a soft breath against his shoulder woke him.\n\n\tTurning his head, he saw Leonardo lying next to him, still asleep.  Moving as cautiously as possible, Don rolled onto his hip and came up on one elbow to study his brother's face.\n\n\tIt always surprised him how different Leo appeared in repose.  The worry lines, the stress, all of the weight of his burdens that shown through in his expressions and his eyes were gone.  He looked more his age, more a carefree teen than a world weary warrior.\n\n\tStaring at his brother, Don began to think that he'd always loved Leo; loved him with a passion that was greater than a familial attachment.  If there was such a thing as a soul, Don was certain that his and Leo's were intertwined and had been for many eons.  Perhaps bound together for longer than time itself.\n\n\tLeo inhaled deeply and his eyes slowly opened.  His gaze immediately fell on Don and a soft smile lit his features.\n\n\t``This is a view I wouldn't mind waking to every day,'' Leo said.\n\n\tDon returned his smile.  ``Me either.''\n\n\tHe leaned down to kiss Leo and a warm feeling caressed his heart as his brother returned the kiss.\n\n\t``Were you watching me sleep?'' Leo asked.\n\n\t``Only for a couple of minutes,'' Don admitted.  ``It was nice.  I felt like I was watching over you instead of the other way around for once.''\n\n\tLeo lifted a hand and touched Don's cheek with the backs of his fingers.  ``You're always watching over us, Donny.  In one way or another.  I've always loved you for that.  I've always loved you for so many reasons.''\n\n\t``You knew your feelings long before I did,'' Don said.  ``When I recognized how much I loved you, it was torture not to be with you; not to tell you.  How did you ever manage to keep this to yourself for so long?''\n\n\t``I had no choice,'' Leo said.  ``I knew my position and what was expected of me.''\n\n\tHe frowned as he said that and stopped talking.  His gaze seemed to turn inward.\n\n\t``Don't do that,'' Don said, a bit sharper than he'd meant to.  ``Tell me what you're thinking.  We have to be honest with each other above all else.''\n\n\t``I was never supposed to have these feelings, Donny.  Father warned me; trained me.  Insisted I focus first and foremost on my position and my duty,'' Leo said.\n\n\t``You aren't a machine,'' Don insisted.  ``You can't be programmed to bury your emotions.  He should never have expected that of you.''\n\n\t``What choice did he have?'' Leo asked.  ``He knew what we'd have to become in order to survive.  One of us had to make a sacrifice and learn to see the others as a team rather than as individual brothers.  I was best suited to that responsibility.''\n\n\t``But Leo, after all this time it has to be clear to you and Sensei that we are at our best when we fight as family,'' Don said.  ``Those emotional ties carry us through, it separates us from the evil we've had to face.  Our connection makes us strong, our connection makes us unbeatable.''\n\n\t``Our connection can pull us apart as well,'' Leo said.  ``We haven't been functioning properly since that ambush.''\n\n\t``That wasn't the first time we've been ambushed and probably won't be the last,'' Don said.  ``It just so happened that this particular one triggered something in all of us.  We realized our own mortality for the first time.  Maybe because we're old enough now to experience certain needs in an entirely new way, I don't know.  But I do know that we have to deal with it and that means we go forwards, not backwards.''\n\n\t``By forward you mean accepting what we've become to each other,'' Leo said.  ``All of us.''\n\n\tHis expression was dour as he said that. \n\n``We have to talk about this Leo,'' Don said.  ``After we . . . after we made love, you said something.  It concerned me.''\n\n``I said `you're mine','' Leo replied.  ``That's what's worrying you, isn't it?''\n\n``Yes,'' Don said.  ``You know it can't be like that.  There has to be a way you can let that go.''\n\n``It's not as simple as telling myself not to covet you,'' Leo said with a dry laugh.  ``Even though I understand how detrimental it would be to this family for me to allow my possessiveness to get in the way, it's not a switch that's easily turned off.''\n\n``Then we have to find what turned it on in the first place,'' Don said.  ``It's more than never having anything of our own.  We've all shared everything, but we don't all feel a pressing need to own something completely.  The one difference between us is how Father raised you.''\n\nLeo pushed himself upright and scooted back so he could lean back against the wall.  ``I won't put this on Sensei,'' he said, sounding adamant.  ``He has been everything to us; he's sacrificed everything for us.''\n\n``But he's not perfect,'' Don said, sitting up as well.  ``No one wants that label.  It's not fair.  Think of the pressure he's had to endure in keeping us safe.  He's always done his best; what he believes is right.  Do you honestly think he ever realized what he was asking of you?  How could he ever have known what we would all eventually mean to each other?''\n\n``Handing Father a load of guilt won't solve our problems,'' Leo said.\n\n``Have you ever thought that he might already be feeling guilty?'' Don asked.  ``I don't know what you two have talked about but I do know that when he and I spoke, he told me that you had a fear of losing me to Raph and Mikey.  He said he'd told you that you couldn't run from yourself and when he said that, I heard the fear in his voice.  Father is afraid that you believe the only way to control your emotions is to leave us and that it's his fault.  Does that sound like a father who wants his son to remain aloof and unfeeling?''\n\n``Solving this isn't just about the four of us, is it?'' Leo asked with dawning realization.  ``It's a family thing.  To find balance again, Father needs to know that none of us is struggling with hidden emotional turmoil.''\n\n``Maybe you should give him the chance to help you resolve yours,'' Don said softly.  ``I think you'll find that he's receptive.''\n\n``You're as wise as you are smart Donny,'' Leo said with admiration in his tone.  Holding out a hand, he urged Don closer to him.  When Don was by his side, Leo wrapped his arms around his brother and pulled him against his body.\n\nDon sighed, laying his head against Leo's shoulder.  ``If I was truly wise, I'd have understood what was happening to all of us much sooner.  Maybe then we wouldn't have had to go through such a struggle to find our way.''\n\n``Something like this shouldn't be too easy,'' Leo said, kissing the top of Don's head.  ``We should understand completely why we need to be intimate with one another and sometimes that means fighting with our own inner demons.''\n\n``Now who's being wise?'' Don asked, idly tracing the line of a scar along Leo's thigh.\n\n``Do you have any idea of how many times a day I think about you?'' Leo asked, pressing his cheek against Don's head.  ``Ever since we were small I gravitated towards you.  Even when things are in turmoil, when things are tense or dangerous, you have an inner calm that keeps me grounded.  When I start to doubt myself, I only have to look at you to help me understand I can do anything I set my mind to.  I love you with every fiber of my being.''\n\nDon felt his eyes mist over and he tipped his head back to look up at Leo.  ``I love you too, Leo.  With all my heart.''\n\nThey shared another kiss, one that was gentle and filled with promises of more in the future.\n\nWhen their mouths finally separated, Don once more burrowed into Leo's neck.  He knew that Leo was clinging to the idea that Master Splinter could help him accept the concept of sharing Don's physical love.  Perhaps hearing his father tell him that he could be close to his brothers would take him down the path towards that necessary acceptance.  Ultimately, it would be up to Leo to make that happen.  It gave Donatello comfort knowing that Leo never shied away from hard work.\n\n``I should check on Raph,'' Don said, though he didn't move out of Leo's arms.\n\nSqueezing his brother tighter, Leo shushed him and said, ``Can we just enjoy our time together for a little longer?  Can we spend a few more minutes ignoring reality?''\n\nDon thought he heard a plea in those words; an appeal from Leo to be allowed more time away from his burdens.  It made Don sad to think that Leo's every waking moment was filled with the knowledge of his responsibilities.\n\nWas that what Don gave him beyond the physical pleasures they could share?  Leo had said he was drawn to Don's inner calm.  One day Don would tell him that it was Leo's fortitude and internal strength that gave him the ability to be so calm.\n\nFinally Leo released a long, breathy exhale and said, ``As much as I'd like for it to, time doesn't stand still.  We have a family to fix, Donny.  Let's go do that, shall we?''\n\nWith a groan, Don disentangled himself from his brother and followed Leo off of the bed.  As Leo began to gather his gear, Don said, ``Don't put it back on just yet.  We should shower first.  Together.''\n\nLeo's pupils expanded, his desire naked and obvious.  ``Raph's probably still asleep.  I administered a healthy dose of sedative.''\n\n``Then we won't be missed if we spend another hour together,'' Don said, holding out his hand.  ``Mikey won't come upstairs until he knows we're ready for him to.''\n\n``His insight has always impressed me,'' Leo murmured.\n\nDon stopped at the door, a thought coming to him.  ``Leo, were you thinking about asking if I'd move out of here with you?''\n\n``Mikey's insight has also scared me from time to time,'' Leo said with a shake of his head.  ``He knows us too well.''\n\n``I'll take that as a yes,'' Don said.  ``What do you think would have happened to the family if I had agreed to do that?''\n\n``Would you have agreed?'' Leo asked.\n\n``I don't know.  Maybe,'' Don answered.  ``If you had insisted on leaving, I wouldn't have wanted you to be alone.  It wouldn't have kept me away from here.''\n\n``Away from Raph and Mikey you mean,'' Leo said.  ``The thought to ask you to leave with me was fleeting, Donny.  I only ever thought seriously about leaving when I was angry.  When I thought you guys didn't need me and were only humoring me as leader.''\n\n``You know now that we do need you, don't you, Leo?'' Don asked.  ``We wouldn't last long without you, for a lot of different reasons.''\n\n``Surprisingly, Raph said much the same thing when I was waiting for his sedative to kick in,'' Leo said.  ``He said he fights me about some of my decisions only because he needs to know that he's the only one who ever makes rash choices.''\n\n``That sounds like Raph,'' Don said.  ``All three of us know that we couldn't do what you do so well.  In an emergency, we can fall back on our training, but we only have that training because you and Father push us so hard.  Even Mikey would admit we never want that to change.''\n\n``It won't,'' Leo said.  A look of resolve appeared on his face.  ``I'm going to talk to Master Splinter after we get cleaned up.  I want you to go with me.  Would you do that?''\n\nDon was a little surprised because Leo usually conferred in private with their father.  He thought he understood why he needed to be present this time though.\n\n``Of course,'' Don said, adding nothing more.  Leo seemed relieved.\n\nShowering with Leo was a much different experience than when Don had done so with either Mikey or Raph.  Where they had been teasing and somewhat forceful, Leo was tender and reverent.\n\nHis touch as they cleaned each other was a gentle caress, a loving brush of fingertips that soon had Donatello inflamed.  He was nearly breathless when he asked Leo to mark him again.\n\nTaking Don from behind, Leo bit into his shoulder and held on as he plunged his length into his brother.  The rush of feelings was decadent, the ecstasy of their love making a natural high beyond anything Don had ever experienced.  At the very apex of his pleasure, Don wondered how he could have ever been so apathetic towards sex.\n\nAs Don had predicted, it was very nearly an hour before he and Leo exited the bathroom.  Together they went to Don's room so that he could retrieve his mask and bo. \n\nRemembering that Mikey had teased him about soiling his sheets, Don made a quick trip to his brother's room in order to change the bed linens.  Mikey would notice and kid him about it, but that would be bad enough without Don leaving actual evidence of his coupling with Leo.  Besides, it would have been inconsiderate to stick Mikey with the clean up after the caring way his younger brother had treated him.\n\nDownstairs, Don and Leo went to the infirmary together.  Though it had been hours, Raph was still asleep, an extra pillow under his shoulder helping to keep his arm both comfortable and immobile.\n\nMikey lay on the other cot, partially turned towards Raph and sleeping deeply.  He had pulled his cot close to Raph's; close enough so that the two were nearly touching.\n\n``I didn't think to put a pillow there to keep Raph from moving his arm while he slept,'' Leo whispered.  ``Mikey must have done that.''\n\n``I'm not sure if it was the sedative or having one of his brothers so near him that's allowing Raph to have such a peaceful sleep,'' Don murmured.  ``I've learned that not having to be alone at night seems to be important to both of them.''\n\n``And to you?'' Leo asked.\n\nDon touched his elbow to indicate they should leave.  There was no sign of Master Splinter, though they could see flickering candlelight shining through the rice paper door of his room.  That told them that their father was still awake.\n\nGoing to the kitchen, they saw that Mikey had not only made dinner, but that he'd cleaned up after.\n\nLeo took the carton of milk from the refrigerator as Don got out two glasses.  When he'd filled them, Leo put the milk away and sat down at the table with Don.\n\nAfter taking a healthy swallow, Don said, ``It's important to me too.  I've gotten used to staying up late and only going to bed through necessity.  Bedtime doesn't feel like a chore to be avoided when I know that I won't be in that bed by myself.''\n\n``Do you think Raph and Mikey find that same comfort in just sleeping near each other?'' Leo asked.\n\n``It looked that way to me,'' Don said.  ``They aren't physically attracted to each other, but that doesn't mean they can't experience a sense of well-being from sharing a bed.''\n\n``You suggested I should try something similar with them when you're spending the night with someone other than me,'' Leo said.  He looked around the kitchen and almost as though talking to himself added, ``Mike has hidden depths.  I think . . . I think I could sleep with him and enjoy his company.  Raph is more of a challenge.''\n\n ``That's only because you and Raph have convinced yourselves that you have to constantly be at loggerheads with each other,'' Don said.  ``You don't have to raise your shields every time you see Raph.  Seeing you do that puts him on the defensive.  Look how the two of you interacted after he was hurt, when you just talked with one another.  That's what it's like to lie next to someone, to hold them and simply relax.  There is no agenda, there's just the two of you at peace with each other.  Like when we were kids.''\n\n``And what do I do when he makes a snide comment about some decision I've made?'' Leo asked.\n\n``First, don't assume he's going to because that leads to tension,'' Don said.  ``Second, when he says those things, he's not always being sarcastic or judgmental.  That's just how it sounds to you because you see it as a personal attack.  Try not to take it that way.  You'd be surprised at how easy it is to talk to Raph when you simply let him express his opinion and take it as such.  He wants to feel valued just as much as you do.''\n\nLeo had been staring into his glass and now looked up.  ``I've often wondered how you manage not to snap at him when he's trying to rush you or makes some reference to your intellect.''\n\nChuckling, Don said, ``All of you rush me when we're in a tough situation.  I'm pretty good at blocking it out.  And those things he calls me are pet names, not derogatory ones.  They're terms of endearment, not scorn.  You've heard what he calls Mikey and Mikey never gets upset, he just gives it right back in a completely playful manner.''\n\nFinishing his milk, Leo stood up.  ``Speaking of Raph and Mikey, I think we should make our approach to Master Splinter now before one of them wakes up.''\n\n``And before Father turns in,'' Don said, draining his glass and handing it to Leo, who quickly washed them.\n\nDon took Leo's hand as they approached Master Splinter's room and Leo gave it a reassuring squeeze before tapping lightly on the door.\n\n``Enter my sons,'' Master Splinter called out.\n\nLeo did not release Don's hand when they stepped into the room.  Master Splinter's eyes flickered down to their joined hands as they walked towards him and Don was certain he saw a slight smile etch his father's lips.\n\nMaster Splinter knelt to one side of his low table and with a wave of his hand indicated that his sons should seat themselves opposite him.\n\n``The last I checked, Raphael was resting quietly with Michelangelo keeping watch over him,'' Master Splinter said once they were seated.  ``This left the two of you alone to work through your issues.  Have you done so?''\n\n``Yes Father,'' Leo replied, glancing at Don and then back again.  ``At least, some of them.''\n\n``Enough so that you no longer feel as though you need to move from your home?'' Master Splinter asked.\n\n``That much yes.  Donny has convinced me that you were right, I can't run away from myself, no matter how far I go,'' Leo said.\n\n``Have you found what it is inside of you that made you feel as though running was your only alternative?'' Master Splinter asked.\n\n``That was more difficult,'' Leo admitted.  ``I think it was partially resentment at myself for having such strong feelings towards Don.''\n\nMaster Splinter studied him for a moment.  ``Feelings you feared would not be reciprocated in kind by your brother?  Perhaps due to the fact that he appeared to have those types of feelings towards both Raphael and Michelangelo?''\n\n``Yes,'' Leo said.  ``I am shamed by my actions in response to those feelings.''\n\nDon was impressed by how Leo kept his head up and his gaze steadily fixed on their father, despite the embarrassment of their topic of discussion.\n\n``Reacting with violence is not an acceptable way to handle jealousy,'' Master Splinter said, ``but your doing so is not your fault, Leonardo.  It is mine.''\n\nHis words startled both of his sons.  Leo was the first to speak.  ``Father?''\n\n``I believed that training you to suppress your emotions would make you a better leader for your brothers,'' Master Splinter said.  ``You have always been so focused on learning ninjitsu, on being your best, that instructing you to subdue your own feelings was a simple task.  Too simple.  I should have realized the pitfalls much sooner.''\n\n``You were doing what you believed to be best,'' Don said.  He knew that Leo did not want Master Splinter to carry guilt over his choices.\n\n``It was and in some ways still is easier to comfort myself by holding onto that conviction,'' Master Splinter said.  ``In reality, I have four sons and all of you should have been treated equally.  Leonardo, please accept my apology for the harsh lessons I encumbered you with.  I was so focused on training you as a warrior that I lost sight of the fact that you must also be a brother.''\n\n``Master Splinter . . . .''  Leo stopped to clear his throat.  ``Father.  I can't forgive you for something that I'm not angry with you for doing.  Your teachings have made me strong enough to face our enemies and to protect my family.  Donatello has shown me that I can still hold onto that part of myself while also accepting the love that is in my deepest heart for him.''\n\n``In that way, he is a far better teacher than I have been,'' Master Splinter said, smiling fondly at both of them.  ``He has shown you how to maintain balance and stability.  Donatello, you have sacrificed much to arrive at this point.  You have allowed two of your brothers to cross boundaries in order to satisfy their own desperate needs and in doing so, you have been forced to question everything you formerly believed of yourself.''\n\n``It was disconcerting at first, I must admit,'' Don said.  ``In the long run, they brought out feelings that I didn't realize I had.  I'm not sure I'd want to repeat the way we reached this point, but I am more than happy it all happened.''\n\n``You harbor no resentments at being manipulated into performing sexual acts with your brothers?'' Master Splinter asked.\n\n``I honestly don't.  Both Raph and Mikey have sincerely apologized for the way they engineered our interactions and as for Leo,'' Don said, smiling at his brother, ``no force or manipulation was required.''\n\n``You desired him,'' Master Splinter said.  ``And you, Leonardo, despite my harsh training, have always known of your desire for Donatello.''\n\n``I could suppress every other emotion but that,'' Leo said.  ``Even with meditation those feelings wouldn't go away.  I tried.''\n\n``Nor could you suppress flashes of anger with Raphael,'' Master Splinter pointed out.  ``The strongest of emotions are often the most valid and refuse to be ignored.  They beg for our comprehension because that is the only way to tame them.  Tonight you have answered your need for Donatello.  How will you handle your differences with Raphael and to a lesser degree, with Michelangelo?''\n\n``I think I start by acknowledging how much I love both of them,'' Leo said with another sideways glance at Don.  ``Knowing that I'm not battling them for Don's affections because he has enough love for all of us.''\n\n``That they will not take Don away from you,'' Master Splinter said, speaking softly.  ``There is no need for envy or possessiveness.  No need for fear of loss.  The four of you will always be together.  I see nothing wrong in strengthening that bond.''\n\n``In sharing Don,'' Leo said.\n\n``More than that, Leonardo.  Sharing Donatello's bed is only one small aspect of this change,'' Master Splinter said.  ``Finding a way for your mind to deal with the knowledge that he will sometimes share your brothers' beds is your next step towards enlightenment.''\n\n``Enlightenment,'' Leo repeated.\n\n``Let them in, Leonardo.  Into your heart, as you have done with Donatello,'' Master Splinter said.  ``Find the feelings of affection and love that you have repressed and allow them some freedom.  You are very strong, my son.  Allowing yourself feelings will not weaken you.  They will not make you less of a leader than you are.  I see now that they will only make you better.''\n\n``I'll find a way to do as you say, Father.  I won't allow this family to be pulled apart by my controlling nature,'' Leo promised.\n\n``Leonardo, please remember that the burden is not all yours,'' Master Splinter said.  ``You and Donatello must help Raphael and Michelangelo overcome their own selfishness as well.  The balance that comes from sharing cannot be reached if they are not shown that they cannot always have exactly what they want, right when they want it.''\n\n``Yes Sensei,'' Leo said.\n\n``Yes Sensei,'' Don said at the same moment.\n\n``It is time for my bed,'' Master Splinter said.  ``I was only waiting up for the two of you.  I was not certain how long it would take before you realized you needed to talk to me.''\n\nDon felt his skin heat up, remembering what it was that had delayed them.  His father's laugh told him that Master Splinter had guessed their secret.\n\n``I'm sorry Father,'' Leo said as he stood up and helped Don to rise as well.\n\n``There is no need for apologies, my sons,'' Master Splinter said.  ``I am here for you, always.  Please remember that.  As long as I draw breath, I shall offer you guidance and I will forever be proud of all of you.''\n\nStill holding hands, Leo and Don left Master Splinter to his sleep.\n\nTBC..............\n\n",
  "writing_bbcode_parsed": "<span style='word-wrap: break-word;'>\tDonatello hadn&#039;t realized he&#039;d fallen asleep until a soft breath against his shoulder woke him.<br /><br />\tTurning his head, he saw Leonardo lying next to him, still asleep.&nbsp;&nbsp;Moving as cautiously as possible, Don rolled onto his hip and came up on one elbow to study his brother&#039;s face.<br /><br />\tIt always surprised him how different Leo appeared in repose.&nbsp;&nbsp;The worry lines, the stress, all of the weight of his burdens that shown through in his expressions and his eyes were gone.&nbsp;&nbsp;He looked more his age, more a carefree teen than a world weary warrior.<br /><br />\tStaring at his brother, Don began to think that he&#039;d always loved Leo; loved him with a passion that was greater than a familial attachment.&nbsp;&nbsp;If there was such a thing as a soul, Don was certain that his and Leo&#039;s were intertwined and had been for many eons.&nbsp;&nbsp;Perhaps bound together for longer than time itself.<br /><br />\tLeo inhaled deeply and his eyes slowly opened.&nbsp;&nbsp;His gaze immediately fell on Don and a soft smile lit his features.<br /><br />\t``This is a view I wouldn&#039;t mind waking to every day,&#039;&#039; Leo said.<br /><br />\tDon returned his smile.&nbsp;&nbsp;``Me either.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />\tHe leaned down to kiss Leo and a warm feeling caressed his heart as his brother returned the kiss.<br /><br />\t``Were you watching me sleep?&#039;&#039; Leo asked.<br /><br />\t``Only for a couple of minutes,&#039;&#039; Don admitted.&nbsp;&nbsp;``It was nice.&nbsp;&nbsp;I felt like I was watching over you instead of the other way around for once.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />\tLeo lifted a hand and touched Don&#039;s cheek with the backs of his fingers.&nbsp;&nbsp;``You&#039;re always watching over us, Donny.&nbsp;&nbsp;In one way or another.&nbsp;&nbsp;I&#039;ve always loved you for that.&nbsp;&nbsp;I&#039;ve always loved you for so many reasons.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />\t``You knew your feelings long before I did,&#039;&#039; Don said.&nbsp;&nbsp;``When I recognized how much I loved you, it was torture not to be with you; not to tell you.&nbsp;&nbsp;How did you ever manage to keep this to yourself for so long?&#039;&#039;<br /><br />\t``I had no choice,&#039;&#039; Leo said.&nbsp;&nbsp;``I knew my position and what was expected of me.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />\tHe frowned as he said that and stopped talking.&nbsp;&nbsp;His gaze seemed to turn inward.<br /><br />\t``Don&#039;t do that,&#039;&#039; Don said, a bit sharper than he&#039;d meant to.&nbsp;&nbsp;``Tell me what you&#039;re thinking.&nbsp;&nbsp;We have to be honest with each other above all else.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />\t``I was never supposed to have these feelings, Donny.&nbsp;&nbsp;Father warned me; trained me.&nbsp;&nbsp;Insisted I focus first and foremost on my position and my duty,&#039;&#039; Leo said.<br /><br />\t``You aren&#039;t a machine,&#039;&#039; Don insisted.&nbsp;&nbsp;``You can&#039;t be programmed to bury your emotions.&nbsp;&nbsp;He should never have expected that of you.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />\t``What choice did he have?&#039;&#039; Leo asked.&nbsp;&nbsp;``He knew what we&#039;d have to become in order to survive.&nbsp;&nbsp;One of us had to make a sacrifice and learn to see the others as a team rather than as individual brothers.&nbsp;&nbsp;I was best suited to that responsibility.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />\t``But Leo, after all this time it has to be clear to you and Sensei that we are at our best when we fight as family,&#039;&#039; Don said.&nbsp;&nbsp;``Those emotional ties carry us through, it separates us from the evil we&#039;ve had to face.&nbsp;&nbsp;Our connection makes us strong, our connection makes us unbeatable.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />\t``Our connection can pull us apart as well,&#039;&#039; Leo said.&nbsp;&nbsp;``We haven&#039;t been functioning properly since that ambush.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />\t``That wasn&#039;t the first time we&#039;ve been ambushed and probably won&#039;t be the last,&#039;&#039; Don said.&nbsp;&nbsp;``It just so happened that this particular one triggered something in all of us.&nbsp;&nbsp;We realized our own mortality for the first time.&nbsp;&nbsp;Maybe because we&#039;re old enough now to experience certain needs in an entirely new way, I don&#039;t know.&nbsp;&nbsp;But I do know that we have to deal with it and that means we go forwards, not backwards.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />\t``By forward you mean accepting what we&#039;ve become to each other,&#039;&#039; Leo said.&nbsp;&nbsp;``All of us.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />\tHis expression was dour as he said that. <br /><br />``We have to talk about this Leo,&#039;&#039; Don said.&nbsp;&nbsp;``After we . . . after we made love, you said something.&nbsp;&nbsp;It concerned me.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``I said `you&#039;re mine&#039;,&#039;&#039; Leo replied.&nbsp;&nbsp;``That&#039;s what&#039;s worrying you, isn&#039;t it?&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``Yes,&#039;&#039; Don said.&nbsp;&nbsp;``You know it can&#039;t be like that.&nbsp;&nbsp;There has to be a way you can let that go.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``It&#039;s not as simple as telling myself not to covet you,&#039;&#039; Leo said with a dry laugh.&nbsp;&nbsp;``Even though I understand how detrimental it would be to this family for me to allow my possessiveness to get in the way, it&#039;s not a switch that&#039;s easily turned off.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``Then we have to find what turned it on in the first place,&#039;&#039; Don said.&nbsp;&nbsp;``It&#039;s more than never having anything of our own.&nbsp;&nbsp;We&#039;ve all shared everything, but we don&#039;t all feel a pressing need to own something completely.&nbsp;&nbsp;The one difference between us is how Father raised you.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />Leo pushed himself upright and scooted back so he could lean back against the wall.&nbsp;&nbsp;``I won&#039;t put this on Sensei,&#039;&#039; he said, sounding adamant.&nbsp;&nbsp;``He has been everything to us; he&#039;s sacrificed everything for us.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``But he&#039;s not perfect,&#039;&#039; Don said, sitting up as well.&nbsp;&nbsp;``No one wants that label.&nbsp;&nbsp;It&#039;s not fair.&nbsp;&nbsp;Think of the pressure he&#039;s had to endure in keeping us safe.&nbsp;&nbsp;He&#039;s always done his best; what he believes is right.&nbsp;&nbsp;Do you honestly think he ever realized what he was asking of you?&nbsp;&nbsp;How could he ever have known what we would all eventually mean to each other?&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``Handing Father a load of guilt won&#039;t solve our problems,&#039;&#039; Leo said.<br /><br />``Have you ever thought that he might already be feeling guilty?&#039;&#039; Don asked.&nbsp;&nbsp;``I don&#039;t know what you two have talked about but I do know that when he and I spoke, he told me that you had a fear of losing me to Raph and Mikey.&nbsp;&nbsp;He said he&#039;d told you that you couldn&#039;t run from yourself and when he said that, I heard the fear in his voice.&nbsp;&nbsp;Father is afraid that you believe the only way to control your emotions is to leave us and that it&#039;s his fault.&nbsp;&nbsp;Does that sound like a father who wants his son to remain aloof and unfeeling?&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``Solving this isn&#039;t just about the four of us, is it?&#039;&#039; Leo asked with dawning realization.&nbsp;&nbsp;``It&#039;s a family thing.&nbsp;&nbsp;To find balance again, Father needs to know that none of us is struggling with hidden emotional turmoil.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``Maybe you should give him the chance to help you resolve yours,&#039;&#039; Don said softly.&nbsp;&nbsp;``I think you&#039;ll find that he&#039;s receptive.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``You&#039;re as wise as you are smart Donny,&#039;&#039; Leo said with admiration in his tone.&nbsp;&nbsp;Holding out a hand, he urged Don closer to him.&nbsp;&nbsp;When Don was by his side, Leo wrapped his arms around his brother and pulled him against his body.<br /><br />Don sighed, laying his head against Leo&#039;s shoulder.&nbsp;&nbsp;``If I was truly wise, I&#039;d have understood what was happening to all of us much sooner.&nbsp;&nbsp;Maybe then we wouldn&#039;t have had to go through such a struggle to find our way.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``Something like this shouldn&#039;t be too easy,&#039;&#039; Leo said, kissing the top of Don&#039;s head.&nbsp;&nbsp;``We should understand completely why we need to be intimate with one another and sometimes that means fighting with our own inner demons.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``Now who&#039;s being wise?&#039;&#039; Don asked, idly tracing the line of a scar along Leo&#039;s thigh.<br /><br />``Do you have any idea of how many times a day I think about you?&#039;&#039; Leo asked, pressing his cheek against Don&#039;s head.&nbsp;&nbsp;``Ever since we were small I gravitated towards you.&nbsp;&nbsp;Even when things are in turmoil, when things are tense or dangerous, you have an inner calm that keeps me grounded.&nbsp;&nbsp;When I start to doubt myself, I only have to look at you to help me understand I can do anything I set my mind to.&nbsp;&nbsp;I love you with every fiber of my being.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />Don felt his eyes mist over and he tipped his head back to look up at Leo.&nbsp;&nbsp;``I love you too, Leo.&nbsp;&nbsp;With all my heart.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />They shared another kiss, one that was gentle and filled with promises of more in the future.<br /><br />When their mouths finally separated, Don once more burrowed into Leo&#039;s neck.&nbsp;&nbsp;He knew that Leo was clinging to the idea that Master Splinter could help him accept the concept of sharing Don&#039;s physical love.&nbsp;&nbsp;Perhaps hearing his father tell him that he could be close to his brothers would take him down the path towards that necessary acceptance.&nbsp;&nbsp;Ultimately, it would be up to Leo to make that happen.&nbsp;&nbsp;It gave Donatello comfort knowing that Leo never shied away from hard work.<br /><br />``I should check on Raph,&#039;&#039; Don said, though he didn&#039;t move out of Leo&#039;s arms.<br /><br />Squeezing his brother tighter, Leo shushed him and said, ``Can we just enjoy our time together for a little longer?&nbsp;&nbsp;Can we spend a few more minutes ignoring reality?&#039;&#039;<br /><br />Don thought he heard a plea in those words; an appeal from Leo to be allowed more time away from his burdens.&nbsp;&nbsp;It made Don sad to think that Leo&#039;s every waking moment was filled with the knowledge of his responsibilities.<br /><br />Was that what Don gave him beyond the physical pleasures they could share?&nbsp;&nbsp;Leo had said he was drawn to Don&#039;s inner calm.&nbsp;&nbsp;One day Don would tell him that it was Leo&#039;s fortitude and internal strength that gave him the ability to be so calm.<br /><br />Finally Leo released a long, breathy exhale and said, ``As much as I&#039;d like for it to, time doesn&#039;t stand still.&nbsp;&nbsp;We have a family to fix, Donny.&nbsp;&nbsp;Let&#039;s go do that, shall we?&#039;&#039;<br /><br />With a groan, Don disentangled himself from his brother and followed Leo off of the bed.&nbsp;&nbsp;As Leo began to gather his gear, Don said, ``Don&#039;t put it back on just yet.&nbsp;&nbsp;We should shower first.&nbsp;&nbsp;Together.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />Leo&#039;s pupils expanded, his desire naked and obvious.&nbsp;&nbsp;``Raph&#039;s probably still asleep.&nbsp;&nbsp;I administered a healthy dose of sedative.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``Then we won&#039;t be missed if we spend another hour together,&#039;&#039; Don said, holding out his hand.&nbsp;&nbsp;``Mikey won&#039;t come upstairs until he knows we&#039;re ready for him to.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``His insight has always impressed me,&#039;&#039; Leo murmured.<br /><br />Don stopped at the door, a thought coming to him.&nbsp;&nbsp;``Leo, were you thinking about asking if I&#039;d move out of here with you?&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``Mikey&#039;s insight has also scared me from time to time,&#039;&#039; Leo said with a shake of his head.&nbsp;&nbsp;``He knows us too well.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``I&#039;ll take that as a yes,&#039;&#039; Don said.&nbsp;&nbsp;``What do you think would have happened to the family if I had agreed to do that?&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``Would you have agreed?&#039;&#039; Leo asked.<br /><br />``I don&#039;t know.&nbsp;&nbsp;Maybe,&#039;&#039; Don answered.&nbsp;&nbsp;``If you had insisted on leaving, I wouldn&#039;t have wanted you to be alone.&nbsp;&nbsp;It wouldn&#039;t have kept me away from here.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``Away from Raph and Mikey you mean,&#039;&#039; Leo said.&nbsp;&nbsp;``The thought to ask you to leave with me was fleeting, Donny.&nbsp;&nbsp;I only ever thought seriously about leaving when I was angry.&nbsp;&nbsp;When I thought you guys didn&#039;t need me and were only humoring me as leader.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``You know now that we do need you, don&#039;t you, Leo?&#039;&#039; Don asked.&nbsp;&nbsp;``We wouldn&#039;t last long without you, for a lot of different reasons.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``Surprisingly, Raph said much the same thing when I was waiting for his sedative to kick in,&#039;&#039; Leo said.&nbsp;&nbsp;``He said he fights me about some of my decisions only because he needs to know that he&#039;s the only one who ever makes rash choices.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``That sounds like Raph,&#039;&#039; Don said.&nbsp;&nbsp;``All three of us know that we couldn&#039;t do what you do so well.&nbsp;&nbsp;In an emergency, we can fall back on our training, but we only have that training because you and Father push us so hard.&nbsp;&nbsp;Even Mikey would admit we never want that to change.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``It won&#039;t,&#039;&#039; Leo said.&nbsp;&nbsp;A look of resolve appeared on his face.&nbsp;&nbsp;``I&#039;m going to talk to Master Splinter after we get cleaned up.&nbsp;&nbsp;I want you to go with me.&nbsp;&nbsp;Would you do that?&#039;&#039;<br /><br />Don was a little surprised because Leo usually conferred in private with their father.&nbsp;&nbsp;He thought he understood why he needed to be present this time though.<br /><br />``Of course,&#039;&#039; Don said, adding nothing more.&nbsp;&nbsp;Leo seemed relieved.<br /><br />Showering with Leo was a much different experience than when Don had done so with either Mikey or Raph.&nbsp;&nbsp;Where they had been teasing and somewhat forceful, Leo was tender and reverent.<br /><br />His touch as they cleaned each other was a gentle caress, a loving brush of fingertips that soon had Donatello inflamed.&nbsp;&nbsp;He was nearly breathless when he asked Leo to mark him again.<br /><br />Taking Don from behind, Leo bit into his shoulder and held on as he plunged his length into his brother.&nbsp;&nbsp;The rush of feelings was decadent, the ecstasy of their love making a natural high beyond anything Don had ever experienced.&nbsp;&nbsp;At the very apex of his pleasure, Don wondered how he could have ever been so apathetic towards sex.<br /><br />As Don had predicted, it was very nearly an hour before he and Leo exited the bathroom.&nbsp;&nbsp;Together they went to Don&#039;s room so that he could retrieve his mask and bo. <br /><br />Remembering that Mikey had teased him about soiling his sheets, Don made a quick trip to his brother&#039;s room in order to change the bed linens.&nbsp;&nbsp;Mikey would notice and kid him about it, but that would be bad enough without Don leaving actual evidence of his coupling with Leo.&nbsp;&nbsp;Besides, it would have been inconsiderate to stick Mikey with the clean up after the caring way his younger brother had treated him.<br /><br />Downstairs, Don and Leo went to the infirmary together.&nbsp;&nbsp;Though it had been hours, Raph was still asleep, an extra pillow under his shoulder helping to keep his arm both comfortable and immobile.<br /><br />Mikey lay on the other cot, partially turned towards Raph and sleeping deeply.&nbsp;&nbsp;He had pulled his cot close to Raph&#039;s; close enough so that the two were nearly touching.<br /><br />``I didn&#039;t think to put a pillow there to keep Raph from moving his arm while he slept,&#039;&#039; Leo whispered.&nbsp;&nbsp;``Mikey must have done that.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``I&#039;m not sure if it was the sedative or having one of his brothers so near him that&#039;s allowing Raph to have such a peaceful sleep,&#039;&#039; Don murmured.&nbsp;&nbsp;``I&#039;ve learned that not having to be alone at night seems to be important to both of them.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``And to you?&#039;&#039; Leo asked.<br /><br />Don touched his elbow to indicate they should leave.&nbsp;&nbsp;There was no sign of Master Splinter, though they could see flickering candlelight shining through the rice paper door of his room.&nbsp;&nbsp;That told them that their father was still awake.<br /><br />Going to the kitchen, they saw that Mikey had not only made dinner, but that he&#039;d cleaned up after.<br /><br />Leo took the carton of milk from the refrigerator as Don got out two glasses.&nbsp;&nbsp;When he&#039;d filled them, Leo put the milk away and sat down at the table with Don.<br /><br />After taking a healthy swallow, Don said, ``It&#039;s important to me too.&nbsp;&nbsp;I&#039;ve gotten used to staying up late and only going to bed through necessity.&nbsp;&nbsp;Bedtime doesn&#039;t feel like a chore to be avoided when I know that I won&#039;t be in that bed by myself.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``Do you think Raph and Mikey find that same comfort in just sleeping near each other?&#039;&#039; Leo asked.<br /><br />``It looked that way to me,&#039;&#039; Don said.&nbsp;&nbsp;``They aren&#039;t physically attracted to each other, but that doesn&#039;t mean they can&#039;t experience a sense of well-being from sharing a bed.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``You suggested I should try something similar with them when you&#039;re spending the night with someone other than me,&#039;&#039; Leo said.&nbsp;&nbsp;He looked around the kitchen and almost as though talking to himself added, ``Mike has hidden depths.&nbsp;&nbsp;I think . . . I think I could sleep with him and enjoy his company.&nbsp;&nbsp;Raph is more of a challenge.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />&nbsp;``That&#039;s only because you and Raph have convinced yourselves that you have to constantly be at loggerheads with each other,&#039;&#039; Don said.&nbsp;&nbsp;``You don&#039;t have to raise your shields every time you see Raph.&nbsp;&nbsp;Seeing you do that puts him on the defensive.&nbsp;&nbsp;Look how the two of you interacted after he was hurt, when you just talked with one another.&nbsp;&nbsp;That&#039;s what it&#039;s like to lie next to someone, to hold them and simply relax.&nbsp;&nbsp;There is no agenda, there&#039;s just the two of you at peace with each other.&nbsp;&nbsp;Like when we were kids.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``And what do I do when he makes a snide comment about some decision I&#039;ve made?&#039;&#039; Leo asked.<br /><br />``First, don&#039;t assume he&#039;s going to because that leads to tension,&#039;&#039; Don said.&nbsp;&nbsp;``Second, when he says those things, he&#039;s not always being sarcastic or judgmental.&nbsp;&nbsp;That&#039;s just how it sounds to you because you see it as a personal attack.&nbsp;&nbsp;Try not to take it that way.&nbsp;&nbsp;You&#039;d be surprised at how easy it is to talk to Raph when you simply let him express his opinion and take it as such.&nbsp;&nbsp;He wants to feel valued just as much as you do.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />Leo had been staring into his glass and now looked up.&nbsp;&nbsp;``I&#039;ve often wondered how you manage not to snap at him when he&#039;s trying to rush you or makes some reference to your intellect.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />Chuckling, Don said, ``All of you rush me when we&#039;re in a tough situation.&nbsp;&nbsp;I&#039;m pretty good at blocking it out.&nbsp;&nbsp;And those things he calls me are pet names, not derogatory ones.&nbsp;&nbsp;They&#039;re terms of endearment, not scorn.&nbsp;&nbsp;You&#039;ve heard what he calls Mikey and Mikey never gets upset, he just gives it right back in a completely playful manner.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />Finishing his milk, Leo stood up.&nbsp;&nbsp;``Speaking of Raph and Mikey, I think we should make our approach to Master Splinter now before one of them wakes up.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``And before Father turns in,&#039;&#039; Don said, draining his glass and handing it to Leo, who quickly washed them.<br /><br />Don took Leo&#039;s hand as they approached Master Splinter&#039;s room and Leo gave it a reassuring squeeze before tapping lightly on the door.<br /><br />``Enter my sons,&#039;&#039; Master Splinter called out.<br /><br />Leo did not release Don&#039;s hand when they stepped into the room.&nbsp;&nbsp;Master Splinter&#039;s eyes flickered down to their joined hands as they walked towards him and Don was certain he saw a slight smile etch his father&#039;s lips.<br /><br />Master Splinter knelt to one side of his low table and with a wave of his hand indicated that his sons should seat themselves opposite him.<br /><br />``The last I checked, Raphael was resting quietly with Michelangelo keeping watch over him,&#039;&#039; Master Splinter said once they were seated.&nbsp;&nbsp;``This left the two of you alone to work through your issues.&nbsp;&nbsp;Have you done so?&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``Yes Father,&#039;&#039; Leo replied, glancing at Don and then back again.&nbsp;&nbsp;``At least, some of them.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``Enough so that you no longer feel as though you need to move from your home?&#039;&#039; Master Splinter asked.<br /><br />``That much yes.&nbsp;&nbsp;Donny has convinced me that you were right, I can&#039;t run away from myself, no matter how far I go,&#039;&#039; Leo said.<br /><br />``Have you found what it is inside of you that made you feel as though running was your only alternative?&#039;&#039; Master Splinter asked.<br /><br />``That was more difficult,&#039;&#039; Leo admitted.&nbsp;&nbsp;``I think it was partially resentment at myself for having such strong feelings towards Don.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />Master Splinter studied him for a moment.&nbsp;&nbsp;``Feelings you feared would not be reciprocated in kind by your brother?&nbsp;&nbsp;Perhaps due to the fact that he appeared to have those types of feelings towards both Raphael and Michelangelo?&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``Yes,&#039;&#039; Leo said.&nbsp;&nbsp;``I am shamed by my actions in response to those feelings.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />Don was impressed by how Leo kept his head up and his gaze steadily fixed on their father, despite the embarrassment of their topic of discussion.<br /><br />``Reacting with violence is not an acceptable way to handle jealousy,&#039;&#039; Master Splinter said, ``but your doing so is not your fault, Leonardo.&nbsp;&nbsp;It is mine.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />His words startled both of his sons.&nbsp;&nbsp;Leo was the first to speak.&nbsp;&nbsp;``Father?&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``I believed that training you to suppress your emotions would make you a better leader for your brothers,&#039;&#039; Master Splinter said.&nbsp;&nbsp;``You have always been so focused on learning ninjitsu, on being your best, that instructing you to subdue your own feelings was a simple task.&nbsp;&nbsp;Too simple.&nbsp;&nbsp;I should have realized the pitfalls much sooner.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``You were doing what you believed to be best,&#039;&#039; Don said.&nbsp;&nbsp;He knew that Leo did not want Master Splinter to carry guilt over his choices.<br /><br />``It was and in some ways still is easier to comfort myself by holding onto that conviction,&#039;&#039; Master Splinter said.&nbsp;&nbsp;``In reality, I have four sons and all of you should have been treated equally.&nbsp;&nbsp;Leonardo, please accept my apology for the harsh lessons I encumbered you with.&nbsp;&nbsp;I was so focused on training you as a warrior that I lost sight of the fact that you must also be a brother.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``Master Splinter . . . .&#039;&#039;&nbsp;&nbsp;Leo stopped to clear his throat.&nbsp;&nbsp;``Father.&nbsp;&nbsp;I can&#039;t forgive you for something that I&#039;m not angry with you for doing.&nbsp;&nbsp;Your teachings have made me strong enough to face our enemies and to protect my family.&nbsp;&nbsp;Donatello has shown me that I can still hold onto that part of myself while also accepting the love that is in my deepest heart for him.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``In that way, he is a far better teacher than I have been,&#039;&#039; Master Splinter said, smiling fondly at both of them.&nbsp;&nbsp;``He has shown you how to maintain balance and stability.&nbsp;&nbsp;Donatello, you have sacrificed much to arrive at this point.&nbsp;&nbsp;You have allowed two of your brothers to cross boundaries in order to satisfy their own desperate needs and in doing so, you have been forced to question everything you formerly believed of yourself.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``It was disconcerting at first, I must admit,&#039;&#039; Don said.&nbsp;&nbsp;``In the long run, they brought out feelings that I didn&#039;t realize I had.&nbsp;&nbsp;I&#039;m not sure I&#039;d want to repeat the way we reached this point, but I am more than happy it all happened.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``You harbor no resentments at being manipulated into performing sexual acts with your brothers?&#039;&#039; Master Splinter asked.<br /><br />``I honestly don&#039;t.&nbsp;&nbsp;Both Raph and Mikey have sincerely apologized for the way they engineered our interactions and as for Leo,&#039;&#039; Don said, smiling at his brother, ``no force or manipulation was required.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``You desired him,&#039;&#039; Master Splinter said.&nbsp;&nbsp;``And you, Leonardo, despite my harsh training, have always known of your desire for Donatello.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``I could suppress every other emotion but that,&#039;&#039; Leo said.&nbsp;&nbsp;``Even with meditation those feelings wouldn&#039;t go away.&nbsp;&nbsp;I tried.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``Nor could you suppress flashes of anger with Raphael,&#039;&#039; Master Splinter pointed out.&nbsp;&nbsp;``The strongest of emotions are often the most valid and refuse to be ignored.&nbsp;&nbsp;They beg for our comprehension because that is the only way to tame them.&nbsp;&nbsp;Tonight you have answered your need for Donatello.&nbsp;&nbsp;How will you handle your differences with Raphael and to a lesser degree, with Michelangelo?&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``I think I start by acknowledging how much I love both of them,&#039;&#039; Leo said with another sideways glance at Don.&nbsp;&nbsp;``Knowing that I&#039;m not battling them for Don&#039;s affections because he has enough love for all of us.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``That they will not take Don away from you,&#039;&#039; Master Splinter said, speaking softly.&nbsp;&nbsp;``There is no need for envy or possessiveness.&nbsp;&nbsp;No need for fear of loss.&nbsp;&nbsp;The four of you will always be together.&nbsp;&nbsp;I see nothing wrong in strengthening that bond.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``In sharing Don,&#039;&#039; Leo said.<br /><br />``More than that, Leonardo.&nbsp;&nbsp;Sharing Donatello&#039;s bed is only one small aspect of this change,&#039;&#039; Master Splinter said.&nbsp;&nbsp;``Finding a way for your mind to deal with the knowledge that he will sometimes share your brothers&#039; beds is your next step towards enlightenment.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``Enlightenment,&#039;&#039; Leo repeated.<br /><br />``Let them in, Leonardo.&nbsp;&nbsp;Into your heart, as you have done with Donatello,&#039;&#039; Master Splinter said.&nbsp;&nbsp;``Find the feelings of affection and love that you have repressed and allow them some freedom.&nbsp;&nbsp;You are very strong, my son.&nbsp;&nbsp;Allowing yourself feelings will not weaken you.&nbsp;&nbsp;They will not make you less of a leader than you are.&nbsp;&nbsp;I see now that they will only make you better.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``I&#039;ll find a way to do as you say, Father.&nbsp;&nbsp;I won&#039;t allow this family to be pulled apart by my controlling nature,&#039;&#039; Leo promised.<br /><br />``Leonardo, please remember that the burden is not all yours,&#039;&#039; Master Splinter said.&nbsp;&nbsp;``You and Donatello must help Raphael and Michelangelo overcome their own selfishness as well.&nbsp;&nbsp;The balance that comes from sharing cannot be reached if they are not shown that they cannot always have exactly what they want, right when they want it.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />``Yes Sensei,&#039;&#039; Leo said.<br /><br />``Yes Sensei,&#039;&#039; Don said at the same moment.<br /><br />``It is time for my bed,&#039;&#039; Master Splinter said.&nbsp;&nbsp;``I was only waiting up for the two of you.&nbsp;&nbsp;I was not certain how long it would take before you realized you needed to talk to me.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />Don felt his skin heat up, remembering what it was that had delayed them.&nbsp;&nbsp;His father&#039;s laugh told him that Master Splinter had guessed their secret.<br /><br />``I&#039;m sorry Father,&#039;&#039; Leo said as he stood up and helped Don to rise as well.<br /><br />``There is no need for apologies, my sons,&#039;&#039; Master Splinter said.&nbsp;&nbsp;``I am here for you, always.&nbsp;&nbsp;Please remember that.&nbsp;&nbsp;As long as I draw breath, I shall offer you guidance and I will forever be proud of all of you.&#039;&#039;<br /><br />Still holding hands, Leo and Don left Master Splinter to his sleep.<br /><br />TBC..............<br /><br /></span>",
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