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No money being made.\nWord Count part 9: 4,549 multi-chapter 2k3\nSummary: Donatello is known as the 'go-to Turtle', the guy who can fix all sorts of things. His role in the family takes an unexpected turn when his brothers decide to expand on his job description.\nRatings per chapter vary - R to NC-17\n~~~~This beautifully emotional image created for this part is by the amazing @Sherenelle ", "description_bbcode_parsed": "Disclaimer: The TMNT are not mine. No money being made.
Word Count part 9: 4,549 multi-chapter 2k3
Summary: Donatello is known as the 'go-to Turtle', the guy who can fix all sorts of things.  His role in the family takes an unexpected turn when his brothers decide to expand on his job description.
Ratings per chapter vary - R to NC-17
~~~~This beautifully emotional image created for this part is by the amazing @Sherenelle ", "writing": "\tThe expression Donatello had seen on Leonardo’s face as he’d watched his two middle brothers enter the bathroom together haunted the genius. Since it was obvious that Raphael would be sharing a shower stall with Don, he could only imagine what Leo must have thought.\n\n\tWho was he kidding? Don knew exactly what had gone through Leo’s head. Raph had voiced it before they’d left Don’s room. Showering together was supposed to tell their big brother that they weren’t bashful about having sex with each other. That Don was okay with having sex with his brothers and didn’t consider that he was being used.\n\n\tWhy then did Don feel like he was letting Leo down?\n\n\tFortunately once they were in the bathroom Raph was all business. Though Raph insisted on scrubbing Don’s shell, nothing else happened. Perhaps Raph sensed that Don was in no mood to play or it was simply that the big guy had been sated by the hand job Don had given him earlier.\n\n\tConsidering what had happened the night before, Don thought he’d be over feeling embarrassment about anything to do with his body, but when he realized that he needed to clean – really clean - his posterior, the bashfulness returned.\n\n\tRaph noticed. “Ya’ okay, Donny? Ya’ got a funny look on your face. Are ya’ hurting more than ya’ let on?”\n\n\t“No . . . no, it’s not that,” Don said, trying to think how to word the problem. “Um, could I have a couple of minutes to myself in here? It’s . . . hygiene related.”\n\n\tA corner of Raph’s mouth lifted. “If ya’ got a boner I could help ya’ with it.”\n\n\tDon lifted a hand and quickly said, “It’s nothing like that. I have to . . . clean myself thoroughly before I apply that cream I was telling you about.”\n\n\tUnderstanding crept over Raph’s features. “Ah, I get ya’. Okay, I’ll head out first and smooth things over if Leo’s standing out there waiting for us.”\n\n\t“Wait,” Don called hastily as Raph stepped out of the shower and grabbed a towel. “You do remember our arrangement, right?”\n\n\tRubbing himself down briskly, Raph chuckled. “I remember. I’ll be smooth as silk. Any questions he asks, I’ll refer him to you. That sound okay?”\n\n\t“Yes,” Don said with relief. “Could you . . . talk to Mikey? Pull him aside and tell him what we agreed on?”\n\n\t“Ya’ worried that he’s out there right now making sure Leo knows exactly why we had to shower together?” Raph asked shrewdly. “I’ll grab him and pull him off somewhere for a private chat. Sooner the better so he don’t fuck things up.”\n\n\t“Thanks Raph,” Don said, offering his brother a smile as Raph slipped out the door.\n\n\tThe smile faded once Raph was gone. This situation was far more complicated than Raph wanted to acknowledge and it appeared that both Raph and Mikey were happy to let Don do all the worrying.\n\n\tRaph’s promises with regards to Leo fell glibly from his tongue because he’d been mellow and satiated when he’d made them. It was easy to say that he’d abstain from arguing with Leo while in such a relaxed mood, quite another to actually do so once he was angered.\n\n\tThen there was Mikey to consider. Don had no qualms about his younger brother agreeing to the terms of the pact that the genius had proposed. Mikey was enough of an opportunist to seize on the easiest path towards getting what he wanted.\n\n\tHow long could Mikey maintain the focus he’d shown during practice the day before? It was really the primary thing that Don wanted from him and could prove to be as difficult for him to do as it would be for Raph to control his temper.\n\n\tWhat exactly could he and would he do if one or both of his brothers reneged on their promise? That was just another problem for Donatello to ponder.\n\n\tHaving meticulously cleansed his backside, Don turned the shower off and stepped out to dry himself. Draping the used towel next to Raph’s, Don left the bathroom.\n\n\tOn his way back to his room, Don heard Master Splinter’s voice and glanced downstairs to see his father entering the kitchen. He wondered who his father had been speaking to, thinking that not much time had passed for the conversation Raph had promised to have with Mikey.\n\n\tThe scent of sex hit his nostrils as soon as Don entered his room. With a grimace, Don crossed to his bed and gathered the sheets into a bundle, placing it near the door. As he geared up, another thought crossed Don’s mind and this one had to do with Master Splinter.\n\n\tIt was all well and good that he’d reminded Raph they couldn’t be blatant about the fact they were having sex because of their father, but Master Splinter would inevitably learn about it at some point.\n\n\tWould it be better to simply tell Master Splinter what was going on, or to have him learn about it on his own? Leo had already pointed out that their incest would not meet with his approval. Both Raph and Mikey had been quick to say that Master Splinter didn’t need to know what they were doing. That was a head-in-the-sand approach and wasn’t feasible.\n\n\tDon shook his head, knowing that the answers weren’t going to suddenly flash up in front of his face. He had things to do before practice began and he wasn’t making progress on them by standing in the middle of his room staring into space.\n\n\tPicking up the bundle of soiled bedding, Don took it downstairs and shoved everything into their tiny washing machine. Once the cycle had begun, he headed for his lab.\n\n\tDigging around in a drawer of medications that had somehow found their way from the infirmary to his lab, Don located the tube of lidocaine cream. He took it with him into the infirmary, locking the door so that he could apply the ointment without interruption.\n\n\tA tide of mortification swept over him as Don spread the cream around his anal entrance and then used the tip of his finger to apply some into the first half inch of his anus. At first the intrusion further irritated that already sore part of his anatomy, but after a moment, the area began to numb.\n\n\tWith a sigh of relief, Don washed his hands and then tucked the tube away in the medical supply cabinet. Along with finding the correct anal lubricant during his pharmacy run, Don was going to have to acquire more lidocaine as well. There was no way he wanted Leo along for that particular shopping trip.\n\n\tDonatello meant to go from the infirmary back to his lab, but the smell of fresh coffee beckoned to him and he changed course, going to the kitchen instead. He found Raph and Mikey seated at the table, but Master Splinter was not there.\n\n\t“Didn’t Master Splinter come in here?” Don asked, heading directly for the coffee.\n\n\t“Yeah, but only for a couple minutes,” Raph said. “He was looking for Leo ‘cause Fearless didn’t join him for tea this morning.”\n\n\tThat revelation made Don’s hands shake and he nearly splashed coffee on himself. Turning an alarmed look in his brother’s direction, he said, “He never misses his morning tea with Father. That’s when they go over the day’s practice schedule.”\n\n\t“After Leo saw you two go into the bathroom, he went straight to the dojo,” Mikey said. “I told Master Splinter that’s where he’d find Leo.”\n\n\tTaking his coffee to the table, Don sat down. “Leo couldn’t have skipped tea with Father because of that,” he said hopefully. “They have tea much earlier and we were still asleep.”\n\n\tMikey’s tongue clicked against the roof of his mouth. “He knew you two were together long before he saw you. I got up around two this morning to get some water and on my way back I saw Leo checking Raph’s room. Since he hadn’t seen me, I watched him go to over to your door and listen for a minute before he went back to his own room. You can just bet he heard Raph snoring.”\n\n\t“Great,” Don muttered, taking a sip of his coffee.\n\n\tDon’s other arm lay on the table and Raph reached over to set his hand on Don’s wrist. “Ya’ already knew he was worried that we’d sleep together and ya’ planned to talk to him about it. Stick to our arrangement and that’ll unwind Leo’s gears.”\n\n\t“I’ve promised to do my best to make Leo a happy camper,” Mikey said, smiling confidently at Don. “Don’t worry about a thing.”\n\n\t[i]“If only it were that easy,” [/i]Don thought to himself.\n\n\tHe wouldn’t have managed to eat anything if Mikey hadn’t gotten up to make Don some toast. Both Mikey and Raph were going out of their way to be solicitous and though Don appreciated it, he was also uncomfortable with the attention. To him it felt almost as though they were worried to leave him alone, for fear he’d change his mind about his agreement to continue having sex with them.\n\n\tDon eventually extricated himself from their company and escaped to his lab. It had taken will power not to go instead to the dojo to find out how upset Leo was with him. There wouldn’t be time for a protracted conversation before practice was scheduled to begin and Don didn’t want their talk to be rushed by circumstances.\n\n\tThere were a number of small broken appliances on the floor against one of the walls in the lab. Each time Don scavenged in the junkyard, he found items that fit into one of three categories; things that could be repaired for their personal use, things that could be repaired and sold in April’s shop, and things that were beyond repair but had useable parts.\n\n\tThis pile contained items from the latter category. Rolling a large plastic barrel up next to his worktable for the leftover refuse, Don began pulling a microwave apart. The parts he could use Don placed into a box, the rest was tossed into the barrel.\n\n\tHe only had time to finish up with the microwave before the alarm he’d set to warn him to head in to practice went off. Don detoured to the kitchen to wash his hands before going to the dojo to meet up with his family.\n\n\tRaph was talking to Master Splinter when Don entered, but Mikey hadn’t arrived yet. Leo was standing off to the side, his face an inscrutable mask. He did not acknowledge Don’s presence nor did he look at Mikey when the younger brother finally got to practice, though he was only a couple of minutes late, which was a record.\n\n\tLeonardo was always completely focused while they practiced, but during this one he seemed even more so. His behavior was very reminiscent of how he’d been after Shredder had destroyed April’s shop and nearly beaten Leo to death.\n\n\tWhen practice ended, Leo strode out of the dojo without a word to anyone and went right up to his room. Crestfallen, Don watched his brother shut the door on his family. It was exactly what Leo had done while they’d all recuperated in hiding at Casey’s farmhouse. Leo had secluded himself in the barn, refusing to interact with anyone, ashamed that he’d let his family down.\n\n\tWas Leo ashamed of Don’s behavior with Raph and Mikey? Did he believe that somehow he’d fallen short of protecting Don from them? Maybe he felt as though he’d failed his team; that they’d lost respect for him.\n\n\tOf the numerous things that had passed through Don’s mind with regards to the possible backlash from Leo over the continuing sexcapades, receiving the silent treatment from the leader in blue wasn’t one of them. Don absolutely did not want Leo isolating himself like that and certainly did not want to be the reason Leo felt the need to cut himself off from them.\n\n\tAs he debated going upstairs to talk to his brother, Don felt a presence at his side and glanced over to see Master Splinter. His father was also gazing up towards Leo’s room, but it was clear that he wanted to speak to Don.\n\n\t“Something is troubling your brother,” Master Splinter said quietly. “He has not seen fit to share his concerns with me, though I feel it has to do with whatever caused the short illness that Michelangelo was suffering from the day before yesterday.”\n\n\tThere was the slight sound of a query to Master Splinter’s words. The fact that his father was seeking answers with regards to Leo from someone other than the son in question was a good indication of how deeply Master Splinter’s concerns ran.\n\n\tThough he had mentioned Mikey, it seemed that Master Splinter felt that the crux of the matter lay at Donatello’s door. Whether he thought Don knew all of the answers or was at the center of the controversy itself was only something Don could guess at.\n\n\tDon couldn’t address the core situation with his father, not then. He was too confused by what was happening to be forthright about it and Don certainly did not want another family member thinking he needed to be rescued from his own brothers.\n\n\tHe could be honest about one thing though and had wanted to talk about it to someone. Master Splinter was quite possibly the only one who could understand.\n\n\t“Do you have a minute, Sensei? I’d like to talk to you about what I think might be partly bothering Leo,” Don said.\n\n\t“Of course my son,” Master Splinter said, seeming pleased at Don’s proposal.\n\n\tAs Don entered his father’s room, he noticed that Raph was staring at him, a frown on his face. Smiling in what he hoped was a reassuring manner, Don shook his head slightly so that Raph would know their secret was going to remain that way.\n\n\tAt Master Splinter’s gesture, Don kneeled and then waited for his father to do so. Once they were facing each other, Don said, “I don’t know if Leo’s talked to you much about the ambush we ran into; he hasn’t with me. I think it’s bothering him more than he lets on.”\n\n\t“Beyond outlining the events of that evening, Leonardo has explained nothing else to do with it,” Master Splinter said. “I did not perceive that this would cause him a growing concern or that it would affect him so adversely almost two weeks later.”\n\n\tThough Don could feel his heart in his throat, he pressed forward with what he wanted to say. “You know how you’ve talked to us before about things that happen to us that could be considered life altering? I’m wondering if that ambush might be one of those things. Mikey could have been killed if not for Raph’s sacrifice. We all barely managed to escape with our lives. Having his hands burned so severely has been a real test for Raph’s patience and his mood swings have been trying for all of us, to say the least.”\n\n\t“You have endured his agitation and anger with great skill,” Master Splinter murmured, encouraging Don to continue.\n\n\t“I think it’s more than having to stay in the lair while he recovers that gets to Raph this time,” Don said. “I believe that he’s thought about what his life would be like if he was crippled. That . . . fear is partially to blame for the severity of his outbursts.\n\n\t“Then there’s Mikey. Coming face to face with mortality is hard enough and it’s happened to all of us, but this time was pretty frightening. Being burned alive isn’t like the quick death from a bullet or a sword. I’m sure he’s tried to put it behind him and forget the incident, but Raph’s hands and his attitude are a constant reminder.”\n\n\t“You are saying that Michelangelo’s illness was mental rather than physical,” Master Splinter stated, as though he had already guessed that for himself.\n\n\tDon acknowledged it with a nod of his head. “I’ve been doing what I can for both of them,” he said, striving to keep the exact nature of his efforts out of his thoughts and therefore out of his father’s, “but I think their behavior is a constant reminder for Leo of the fact that we did walk into an ambush that night. I’ve told him that it wasn’t his fault but I’m sure he still thinks that it was.”\n\n\t“I too have reminded him that it is not possible to foresee every conceivable action an enemy might take,” Master Splinter said. “We train hard in order to not only anticipate what might happen, but to also react quickly to the things that do happen. What I cannot conceive is why guilt over that incident would manifest itself with such force so many days later. Leonardo does not act on whim; there must have been a catalyst of some sort to bring about such a violent change in his attitude.”\n\n\tUnfortunately, Don knew all too well what had made Leo choose to avoid everyone, including his own father. Leo had been certain that Master Splinter would immediately see that something was bothering him and would insist that his son share his burden.\n\nDuring the confrontation between the brothers in the infirmary, Leo had said he didn’t believe Master Splinter would approve of his sons having sex with each other. His conviction that their father not be made privy to their actions was yet another encumbrance Leonardo had chosen to shoulder.\n\nLying to Master Splinter was something that Leo refrained from doing at all costs. Don felt a surge of regret that it was entirely his fault that Leo felt he couldn’t interact with his own father in order to keep his brother’s secrets buried.\n\nReflecting along those lines brought another question to Don’s mind and he decided to broach the subject. “Master Splinter, maybe it’s my fault that Leo is being so distant. I’ve been giving Raph and Mikey a lot of my attention in the last few days, more so than usual. Raph mentioned something to me about how he thinks Leo favors me. I don’t think that’s so,” he rushed to say, “but Raph is convinced of it. Could Leo really just need more of my attention than I’ve been giving to him?”\n\nRather than answering straight away, Master Splinter contemplated Don long enough for the young turtle to begin to feel uncomfortable.\n\n“That is an interesting notion,” Master Splinter finally said. “I know that Leonardo finds your support to be invaluable. Perhaps the thought that you do not have time for him has colored his behavior. Have you a suggestion on how to learn if this is the case?”\n\nDon could feel a flush rising to his face. He had begun this conversation in the hopes that Master Splinter would try to do something to snap Leo out of his funk. Now his father was handing that task over to him.\n\nMaybe Don was getting his wish after all. Master Splinter [i]was [/i]doing something; he was delegating.\n\n“I guess talking to him would be a good start,” Don said slowly. “If he’ll talk to me that is.”\n\n“Then you should give him the opportunity,” Master Splinter, standing up to indicate that their conversation was over. “Perhaps now would be a good time, before it grows much later and his resentments fester.”\n\nDon got up too, bowing to his father before leaving the room. Contemplating the stairs, Don had to ask himself what kind of vibe he’d been giving off lately that caused his family members to feel the need to exploit him. Now he even felt as though Master Splinter was jockeying him into a position where he had to tackle something that was unpleasant.\n\nAmend that; everyone but Leo had manipulated him. Leo had voiced his concerns but hadn’t pushed Donny to do anything. He’d even offered to help Don and had gotten his overtures thrown back in his face.\n\nNo wonder Leo hadn’t been in the mood to interact with anyone. It really was up to Don to speak to him and explain things. He’d told Raph that he would, though he had no idea how to ease into that subject.\n\nBefore he could set a foot on the staircase, Raphael suddenly appeared at his side.\n\n“What did Master Splinter want?” Raph asked.\n\n“To talk about Leo,” Don said.\n\nRaph looked up towards Leo’s room. “Yeah, I guess he is acting . . . weird. I sort of expected him to tear into us head on the way he did last time. He hasn’t said two words to me or Mikey today.”\n\n“To me either,” Don said. “Master Splinter said I should try to get him to open up.”\n\n“You’re the one to do it,” Raph acknowledged.\n\nOnce more there was the innuendo that Don’s words carried more weight with Leo than anyone else’s. Don wanted to resent the implication, but he didn’t have the time or energy to have that argument with Raph. Don had a feeling that he’d need all he had for his talk with Leo.\n\nSo all Don said was, “Wish me luck.”\n\nHe didn’t wait for a response, instead climbing the stairs quickly and going directly to Leo’s room. Don listened for a moment and of course heard nothing, so he tapped on the door.\n\n“Enter.” Leo’s voice didn’t sound at all welcoming, but Don availed himself of the invitation and went into the room, closing the door behind him.\n\nLeo was sprawled on his bed, his shell propped against the wall and a thick book open in his hands. When he closed it on his finger to look up, Don saw that it was one of his brother’s many tomes on military strategy.\n\n“Could we talk a minute?” Don asked, surprised his voice didn’t shake with how nervous he was feeling.\n\n“About what?” Leo asked coolly. He didn’t invite his brother to sit so Don remained standing, his hands clutched together behind his back.\n\n“About Raph coming out of my room this morning and going in to shower with me,” Don said bluntly.\n\nLeo eyed him without giving away a hint of emotion. “Why should what you do in private be any concern of mine?”\n\nSo Leo had decided not to make this easy on him. Don should have expected that. He was the one who’d kept telling Leo that he could handle his own affairs, essentially saying that Leo should butt out. Leo was now throwing that back in his face.\n\nThe coldness of his demeanor was too much for Don, whose legs had begun to tremble. Walking to the bed, Don plopped down near his brother’s feet and folded his hands in his lap. Looking down at them, he saw his tension reflected in how tightly he was gripping his own fingers. He knew that Leo probably saw it as well.\n\n“There’s no way I can stop,” Don admitted, his voice low. This was absolutely not what he wanted to say; he’d meant to find some way to appease Leo’s concerns and frustration with him, but what popped out was the exact truth.\n\nA quick glance at Leo’s face showed him that his brother was gazing at him steadily, as though looking into Don’s head. Returning to the study of his fingers, Don waited to see if Leo would say anything.\n\nFinally he did. “Go on.”\n\nThe tightness in Don’s chest only increased at those two words. “They need what I can give them,” he said. “I’ve never considered how alone we are. I mean, I know the truth of that, but it isn’t something I’ve dwelt on. Apparently Raph and Mikey have. Maybe that’s why they are less content to remain underground and are more drawn to what the topside world has to offer then I’ve ever been.”\n\n“Is that a reason to . . . ,” Leo stopped himself. “Never mind. Continue.”\n\nDon had a feeling he knew what Leo had been about to ask. “Yes it is,” he answered anyway. “Maybe I’m not as into physical comfort as they are, but it brings me a certain level of satisfaction to be able to offer it to them. I’m not losing anything by giving them my body, Leo. In fact, I’m gaining something. They open up to me about things, about feelings, that they would never have shared before. If I can relieve them of some of the discontentment they’ve felt, shouldn’t I do that?”\n\nHe was well aware of how pleading the last sentence had sounded and couldn’t bring himself to look at Leo because of that.\n\n“You do realize that’s completely counter to the assurances you’ve been giving me all along,” Leo said. “At first you shrugged it off as a medical procedure, then it was about quality of life and certain necessities. Now you talk as if this is a permanent thing; that you are in a relationship with your brothers. I’m supposed to take your word for it that you’ve accepted this as normal, but you’re sitting here on my bed and you’re trembling while you try to explain it to me.”\n\n“It’s because I don’t want to feel caught between you three,” Don wailed desperately. “Being needed is what I need. I know that sounds irrational, but it’s the truth. Please say you don’t hate me for that.”\n\nLeo blinked rapidly, as if surprised at Don’s outburst. “I don’t hate you,” he said.\n\n“You just don’t want to have anything to do with me,” Don said pitifully.\n\nSighing deeply, Leo tossed his book aside and sat up so that he was close to Don. “What would you have me do?” he asked. “You told me to let you handle the situation and assured me it wasn’t getting away from you when it was clear to me that it was. Now you want to accept including a sexual component into your sibling bond with Raph and Mikey. Free will is there for a reason. I could see from the beginning that you weren’t interested in sex, but you’ve obviously gone all the way with Raph. The only option you’ve left me with is to shut my mouth and avert my gaze.”\n\n“I don’t want you to do that,” Don said quickly. “You separate yourself from your brothers that way and it’s not good for any of us.”\n\nWithout thinking about it, Don grasped one of Leo’s hands between his own and pulled it to his chest.\n\n“Donny . . . .” Leo began, though he didn’t try to pull away.\n\n“Tell me what you want me to do and I’ll do it,” Don said, staring into Leo’s eyes. “Just stay with us, okay?”\n\nHe found himself leaning towards Leo, unsure of what he should do next. Don felt as though Leo’s eyes were boring directly into his heart, seeing something there that Don himself had yet to acknowledge.\n\nThat moment slowed, time seeming to come to a standstill. Don rather hoped that it had.\n\nTBC………… \n\n", "writing_bbcode_parsed": "\tThe expression Donatello had seen on Leonardo’s face as he’d watched his two middle brothers enter the bathroom together haunted the genius.  Since it was obvious that Raphael would be sharing a shower stall with Don, he could only imagine what Leo must have thought.

\tWho was he kidding?  Don knew exactly what had gone through Leo’s head.  Raph had voiced it before they’d left Don’s room.  Showering together was supposed to tell their big brother that they weren’t bashful about having sex with each other.  That Don was okay with having sex with his brothers and didn’t consider that he was being used.

\tWhy then did Don feel like he was letting Leo down?

\tFortunately once they were in the bathroom Raph was all business.  Though Raph insisted on scrubbing Don’s shell, nothing else happened.  Perhaps Raph sensed that Don was in no mood to play or it was simply that the big guy had been sated by the hand job Don had given him earlier.

\tConsidering what had happened the night before, Don thought he’d be over feeling embarrassment about anything to do with his body, but when he realized that he needed to clean – really clean - his posterior, the bashfulness returned.

\tRaph noticed.  “Ya’ okay, Donny?  Ya’ got a funny look on your face.  Are ya’ hurting more than ya’ let on?”

\t“No . . . no, it’s not that,” Don said, trying to think how to word the problem.  “Um, could I have a couple of minutes to myself in here?  It’s . . . hygiene related.”

\tA corner of Raph’s mouth lifted.  “If ya’ got a boner I could help ya’ with it.”

\tDon lifted a hand and quickly said, “It’s nothing like that.  I have to . . . clean myself thoroughly before I apply that cream I was telling you about.”

\tUnderstanding crept over Raph’s features.  “Ah, I get ya’.  Okay, I’ll head out first and smooth things over if Leo’s standing out there waiting for us.”

\t“Wait,” Don called hastily as Raph stepped out of the shower and grabbed a towel.  “You do remember our arrangement, right?”

\tRubbing himself down briskly, Raph chuckled.  “I remember.  I’ll be smooth as silk.  Any questions he asks, I’ll refer him to you.  That sound okay?”

\t“Yes,” Don said with relief.  “Could you . . . talk to Mikey?  Pull him aside and tell him what we agreed on?”

\t“Ya’ worried that he’s out there right now making sure Leo knows exactly why we had to shower together?” Raph asked shrewdly.  “I’ll grab him and pull him off somewhere for a private chat.  Sooner the better so he don’t fuck things up.”

\t“Thanks Raph,” Don said, offering his brother a smile as Raph slipped out the door.

\tThe smile faded once Raph was gone.  This situation was far more complicated than Raph wanted to acknowledge and it appeared that both Raph and Mikey were happy to let Don do all the worrying.

\tRaph’s promises with regards to Leo fell glibly from his tongue because he’d been mellow and satiated when he’d made them.  It was easy to say that he’d abstain from arguing with Leo while in such a relaxed mood, quite another to actually do so once he was angered.

\tThen there was Mikey to consider.  Don had no qualms about his younger brother agreeing to the terms of the pact that the genius had proposed.  Mikey was enough of an opportunist to seize on the easiest path towards getting what he wanted.

\tHow long could Mikey maintain the focus he’d shown during practice the day before?  It was really the primary thing that Don wanted from him and could prove to be as difficult for him to do as it would be for Raph to control his temper.

\tWhat exactly could he and would he do if one or both of his brothers reneged on their promise?  That was just another problem for Donatello to ponder.

\tHaving meticulously cleansed his backside, Don turned the shower off and stepped out to dry himself.  Draping the used towel next to Raph’s, Don left the bathroom.

\tOn his way back to his room, Don heard Master Splinter’s voice and glanced downstairs to see his father entering the kitchen.  He wondered who his father had been speaking to, thinking that not much time had passed for the conversation Raph had promised to have with Mikey.

\tThe scent of sex hit his nostrils as soon as Don entered his room.  With a grimace, Don crossed to his bed and gathered the sheets into a bundle, placing it near the door.  As he geared up, another thought crossed Don’s mind and this one had to do with Master Splinter.

\tIt was all well and good that he’d reminded Raph they couldn’t be blatant about the fact they were having sex because of their father, but Master Splinter would inevitably learn about it at some point.

\tWould it be better to simply tell Master Splinter what was going on, or to have him learn about it on his own?  Leo had already pointed out that their incest would not meet with his approval.  Both Raph and Mikey had been quick to say that Master Splinter didn’t need to know what they were doing.  That was a head-in-the-sand approach and wasn’t feasible.

\tDon shook his head, knowing that the answers weren’t going to suddenly flash up in front of his face.  He had things to do before practice began and he wasn’t making progress on them by standing in the middle of his room staring into space.

\tPicking up the bundle of soiled bedding, Don took it downstairs and shoved everything into their tiny washing machine.  Once the cycle had begun, he headed for his lab.

\tDigging around in a drawer of medications that had somehow found their way from the infirmary to his lab, Don located the tube of lidocaine cream.  He took it with him into the infirmary, locking the door so that he could apply the ointment without interruption.

\tA tide of mortification swept over him as Don spread the cream around his anal entrance and then used the tip of his finger to apply some into the first half inch of his anus.  At first the intrusion further irritated that already sore part of his anatomy, but after a moment, the area began to numb.

\tWith a sigh of relief, Don washed his hands and then tucked the tube away in the medical supply cabinet.  Along with finding the correct anal lubricant during his pharmacy run, Don was going to have to acquire more lidocaine as well.  There was no way he wanted Leo along for that particular shopping trip.

\tDonatello meant to go from the infirmary back to his lab, but the smell of fresh coffee beckoned to him and he changed course, going to the kitchen instead.  He found Raph and Mikey seated at the table, but Master Splinter was not there.

\t“Didn’t Master Splinter come in here?” Don asked, heading directly for the coffee.

\t“Yeah, but only for a couple minutes,” Raph said.  “He was looking for Leo ‘cause Fearless didn’t join him for tea this morning.”

\tThat revelation made Don’s hands shake and he nearly splashed coffee on himself.  Turning an alarmed look in his brother’s direction, he said, “He never misses his morning tea with Father.  That’s when they go over the day’s practice schedule.”

\t“After Leo saw you two go into the bathroom, he went straight to the dojo,” Mikey said.  “I told Master Splinter that’s where he’d find Leo.”

\tTaking his coffee to the table, Don sat down.  “Leo couldn’t have skipped tea with Father because of that,” he said hopefully.  “They have tea much earlier and we were still asleep.”

\tMikey’s tongue clicked against the roof of his mouth.  “He knew you two were together long before he saw you.  I got up around two this morning to get some water and on my way back I saw Leo checking Raph’s room.  Since he hadn’t seen me, I watched him go to over to your door and listen for a minute before he went back to his own room.  You can just bet he heard Raph snoring.”

\t“Great,” Don muttered, taking a sip of his coffee.

\tDon’s other arm lay on the table and Raph reached over to set his hand on Don’s wrist.  “Ya’ already knew he was worried that we’d sleep together and ya’ planned to talk to him about it.  Stick to our arrangement and that’ll unwind Leo’s gears.”

\t“I’ve promised to do my best to make Leo a happy camper,” Mikey said, smiling confidently at Don.  “Don’t worry about a thing.”

\t“If only it were that easy,” Don thought to himself.

\tHe wouldn’t have managed to eat anything if Mikey hadn’t gotten up to make Don some toast.  Both Mikey and Raph were going out of their way to be solicitous and though Don appreciated it, he was also uncomfortable with the attention.  To him it felt almost as though they were worried to leave him alone, for fear he’d change his mind about his agreement to continue having sex with them.

\tDon eventually extricated himself from their company and escaped to his lab.  It had taken will power not to go instead to the dojo to find out how upset Leo was with him.  There wouldn’t be time for a protracted conversation before practice was scheduled to begin and Don didn’t want their talk to be rushed by circumstances.

\tThere were a number of small broken appliances on the floor against one of the walls in the lab.  Each time Don scavenged in the junkyard, he found items that fit into one of three categories; things that could be repaired for their personal use, things that could be repaired and sold in April’s shop, and things that were beyond repair but had useable parts.

\tThis pile contained items from the latter category.  Rolling a large plastic barrel up next to his worktable for the leftover refuse, Don began pulling a microwave apart.  The parts he could use Don placed into a box, the rest was tossed into the barrel.

\tHe only had time to finish up with the microwave before the alarm he’d set to warn him to head in to practice went off.  Don detoured to the kitchen to wash his hands before going to the dojo to meet up with his family.

\tRaph was talking to Master Splinter when Don entered, but Mikey hadn’t arrived yet.  Leo was standing off to the side, his face an inscrutable mask.  He did not acknowledge Don’s presence nor did he look at Mikey when the younger brother finally got to practice, though he was only a couple of minutes late, which was a record.

\tLeonardo was always completely focused while they practiced, but during this one he seemed even more so.  His behavior was very reminiscent of how he’d been after Shredder had destroyed April’s shop and nearly beaten Leo to death.

\tWhen practice ended, Leo strode out of the dojo without a word to anyone and went right up to his room.  Crestfallen, Don watched his brother shut the door on his family.  It was exactly what Leo had done while they’d all recuperated in hiding at Casey’s farmhouse.  Leo had secluded himself in the barn, refusing to interact with anyone, ashamed that he’d let his family down.

\tWas Leo ashamed of Don’s behavior with Raph and Mikey?  Did he believe that somehow he’d fallen short of protecting Don from them?  Maybe he felt as though he’d failed his team; that they’d lost respect for him.

\tOf the numerous things that had passed through Don’s mind with regards to the possible backlash from Leo over the continuing sexcapades, receiving the silent treatment from the leader in blue wasn’t one of them.  Don absolutely did not want Leo isolating himself like that and certainly did not want to be the reason Leo felt the need to cut himself off from them.

\tAs he debated going upstairs to talk to his brother, Don felt a presence at his side and glanced over to see Master Splinter.  His father was also gazing up towards Leo’s room, but it was clear that he wanted to speak to Don.

\t“Something is troubling your brother,” Master Splinter said quietly.  “He has not seen fit to share his concerns with me, though I feel it has to do with whatever caused the short illness that Michelangelo was suffering from the day before yesterday.”

\tThere was the slight sound of a query to Master Splinter’s words.  The fact that his father was seeking answers with regards to Leo from someone other than the son in question was a good indication of how deeply Master Splinter’s concerns ran.

\tThough he had mentioned Mikey, it seemed that Master Splinter felt that the crux of the matter lay at Donatello’s door.  Whether he thought Don knew all of the answers or was at the center of the controversy itself was only something Don could guess at.

\tDon couldn’t address the core situation with his father, not then.  He was too confused by what was happening to be forthright about it and Don certainly did not want another family member thinking he needed to be rescued from his own brothers.

\tHe could be honest about one thing though and had wanted to talk about it to someone.  Master Splinter was quite possibly the only one who could understand.

\t“Do you have a minute, Sensei?  I’d like to talk to you about what I think might be partly bothering Leo,” Don said.

\t“Of course my son,” Master Splinter said, seeming pleased at Don’s proposal.

\tAs Don entered his father’s room, he noticed that Raph was staring at him, a frown on his face.  Smiling in what he hoped was a reassuring manner, Don shook his head slightly so that Raph would know their secret was going to remain that way.

\tAt Master Splinter’s gesture, Don kneeled and then waited for his father to do so.  Once they were facing each other, Don said, “I don’t know if Leo’s talked to you much about the ambush we ran into; he hasn’t with me.  I think it’s bothering him more than he lets on.”

\t“Beyond outlining the events of that evening, Leonardo has explained nothing else to do with it,” Master Splinter said.  “I did not perceive that this would cause him a growing concern or that it would affect him so adversely almost two weeks later.”

\tThough Don could feel his heart in his throat, he pressed forward with what he wanted to say.  “You know how you’ve talked to us before about things that happen to us that could be considered life altering?  I’m wondering if that ambush might be one of those things.  Mikey could have been killed if not for Raph’s sacrifice.  We all barely managed to escape with our lives.  Having his hands burned so severely has been a real test for Raph’s patience and his mood swings have been trying for all of us, to say the least.”

\t“You have endured his agitation and anger with great skill,” Master Splinter murmured, encouraging Don to continue.

\t“I think it’s more than having to stay in the lair while he recovers that gets to Raph this time,” Don said.  “I believe that he’s thought about what his life would be like if he was crippled.  That . . . fear is partially to blame for the severity of his outbursts.

\t“Then there’s Mikey.  Coming face to face with mortality is hard enough and it’s happened to all of us, but this time was pretty frightening.  Being burned alive isn’t like the quick death from a bullet or a sword.  I’m sure he’s tried to put it behind him and forget the incident, but Raph’s hands and his attitude are a constant reminder.”

\t“You are saying that Michelangelo’s illness was mental rather than physical,” Master Splinter stated, as though he had already guessed that for himself.

\tDon acknowledged it with a nod of his head.  “I’ve been doing what I can for both of them,” he said, striving to keep the exact nature of his efforts out of his thoughts and therefore out of his father’s, “but I think their behavior is a constant reminder for Leo of the fact that we did walk into an ambush that night.  I’ve told him that it wasn’t his fault but I’m sure he still thinks that it was.”

\t“I too have reminded him that it is not possible to foresee every conceivable action an enemy might take,” Master Splinter said.  “We train hard in order to not only anticipate what might happen, but to also react quickly to the things that do happen.  What I cannot conceive is why guilt over that incident would manifest itself with such force so many days later.  Leonardo does not act on whim; there must have been a catalyst of some sort to bring about such a violent change in his attitude.”

\tUnfortunately, Don knew all too well what had made Leo choose to avoid everyone, including his own father.  Leo had been certain that Master Splinter would immediately see that something was bothering him and would insist that his son share his burden.

During the confrontation between the brothers in the infirmary, Leo had said he didn’t believe Master Splinter would approve of his sons having sex with each other.  His conviction that their father not be made privy to their actions was yet another encumbrance Leonardo had chosen to shoulder.

Lying to Master Splinter was something that Leo refrained from doing at all costs.  Don felt a surge of regret that it was entirely his fault that Leo felt he couldn’t interact with his own father in order to keep his brother’s secrets buried.

Reflecting along those lines brought another question to Don’s mind and he decided to broach the subject.  “Master Splinter, maybe it’s my fault that Leo is being so distant.  I’ve been giving Raph and Mikey a lot of my attention in the last few days, more so than usual.  Raph mentioned something to me about how he thinks Leo favors me.  I don’t think that’s so,” he rushed to say, “but Raph is convinced of it.  Could Leo really just need more of my attention than I’ve been giving to him?”

Rather than answering straight away, Master Splinter contemplated Don long enough for the young turtle to begin to feel uncomfortable.

“That is an interesting notion,” Master Splinter finally said.  “I know that Leonardo finds your support to be invaluable.  Perhaps the thought that you do not have time for him has colored his behavior.  Have you a suggestion on how to learn if this is the case?”

Don could feel a flush rising to his face.  He had begun this conversation in the hopes that Master Splinter would try to do something to snap Leo out of his funk.  Now his father was handing that task over to him.

Maybe Don was getting his wish after all.  Master Splinter was doing something; he was delegating.

“I guess talking to him would be a good start,” Don said slowly.  “If he’ll talk to me that is.”

“Then you should give him the opportunity,” Master Splinter, standing up to indicate that their conversation was over.  “Perhaps now would be a good time, before it grows much later and his resentments fester.”

Don got up too, bowing to his father before leaving the room.  Contemplating the stairs, Don had to ask himself what kind of vibe he’d been giving off lately that caused his family members to feel the need to exploit him.  Now he even felt as though Master Splinter was jockeying him into a position where he had to tackle something that was unpleasant.

Amend that; everyone but Leo had manipulated him.  Leo had voiced his concerns but hadn’t pushed Donny to do anything.  He’d even offered to help Don and had gotten his overtures thrown back in his face.

No wonder Leo hadn’t been in the mood to interact with anyone.  It really was up to Don to speak to him and explain things.  He’d told Raph that he would, though he had no idea how to ease into that subject.

Before he could set a foot on the staircase, Raphael suddenly appeared at his side.

“What did Master Splinter want?” Raph asked.

“To talk about Leo,” Don said.

Raph looked up towards Leo’s room.  “Yeah, I guess he is acting . . . weird.  I sort of expected him to tear into us head on the way he did last time.  He hasn’t said two words to me or Mikey today.”

“To me either,” Don said.  “Master Splinter said I should try to get him to open up.”

“You’re the one to do it,” Raph acknowledged.

Once more there was the innuendo that Don’s words carried more weight with Leo than anyone else’s.  Don wanted to resent the implication, but he didn’t have the time or energy to have that argument with Raph.  Don had a feeling that he’d need all he had for his talk with Leo.

So all Don said was, “Wish me luck.”

He didn’t wait for a response, instead climbing the stairs quickly and going directly to Leo’s room.  Don listened for a moment and of course heard nothing, so he tapped on the door.

“Enter.”  Leo’s voice didn’t sound at all welcoming, but Don availed himself of the invitation and went into the room, closing the door behind him.

Leo was sprawled on his bed, his shell propped against the wall and a thick book open in his hands.  When he closed it on his finger to look up, Don saw that it was one of his brother’s many tomes on military strategy.

“Could we talk a minute?” Don asked, surprised his voice didn’t shake with how nervous he was feeling.

“About what?” Leo asked coolly.  He didn’t invite his brother to sit so Don remained standing, his hands clutched together behind his back.

“About Raph coming out of my room this morning and going in to shower with me,” Don said bluntly.

Leo eyed him without giving away a hint of emotion.  “Why should what you do in private be any concern of mine?”

So Leo had decided not to make this easy on him.  Don should have expected that.  He was the one who’d kept telling Leo that he could handle his own affairs, essentially saying that Leo should butt out.  Leo was now throwing that back in his face.

The coldness of his demeanor was too much for Don, whose legs had begun to tremble.  Walking to the bed, Don plopped down near his brother’s feet and folded his hands in his lap.  Looking down at them, he saw his tension reflected in how tightly he was gripping his own fingers.  He knew that Leo probably saw it as well.

“There’s no way I can stop,” Don admitted, his voice low.  This was absolutely not what he wanted to say; he’d meant to find some way to appease Leo’s concerns and frustration with him, but what popped out was the exact truth.

A quick glance at Leo’s face showed him that his brother was gazing at him steadily, as though looking into Don’s head.  Returning to the study of his fingers, Don waited to see if Leo would say anything.

Finally he did.  “Go on.”

The tightness in Don’s chest only increased at those two words.  “They need what I can give them,” he said.  “I’ve never considered how alone we are.  I mean, I know the truth of that, but it isn’t something I’ve dwelt on.  Apparently Raph and Mikey have.  Maybe that’s why they are less content to remain underground and are more drawn to what the topside world has to offer then I’ve ever been.”

“Is that a reason to . . . ,” Leo stopped himself.  “Never mind.  Continue.”

Don had a feeling he knew what Leo had been about to ask.  “Yes it is,” he answered anyway.  “Maybe I’m not as into physical comfort as they are, but it brings me a certain level of satisfaction to be able to offer it to them.  I’m not losing anything by giving them my body, Leo.  In fact, I’m gaining something.  They open up to me about things, about feelings, that they would never have shared before.  If I can relieve them of some of the discontentment they’ve felt, shouldn’t I do that?”

He was well aware of how pleading the last sentence had sounded and couldn’t bring himself to look at Leo because of that.

“You do realize that’s completely counter to the assurances you’ve been giving me all along,” Leo said.  “At first you shrugged it off as a medical procedure, then it was about quality of life and certain necessities.  Now you talk as if this is a permanent thing; that you are in a relationship with your brothers.  I’m supposed to take your word for it that you’ve accepted this as normal, but you’re sitting here on my bed and you’re trembling while you try to explain it to me.”

“It’s because I don’t want to feel caught between you three,” Don wailed desperately.  “Being needed is what I need.  I know that sounds irrational, but it’s the truth.  Please say you don’t hate me for that.”

Leo blinked rapidly, as if surprised at Don’s outburst.  “I don’t hate you,” he said.

“You just don’t want to have anything to do with me,” Don said pitifully.

Sighing deeply, Leo tossed his book aside and sat up so that he was close to Don.  “What would you have me do?” he asked.  “You told me to let you handle the situation and assured me it wasn’t getting away from you when it was clear to me that it was.  Now you want to accept including a sexual component into your sibling bond with Raph and Mikey.  Free will is there for a reason.  I could see from the beginning that you weren’t interested in sex, but you’ve obviously gone all the way with Raph.  The only option you’ve left me with is to shut my mouth and avert my gaze.”

“I don’t want you to do that,” Don said quickly.  “You separate yourself from your brothers that way and it’s not good for any of us.”

Without thinking about it, Don grasped one of Leo’s hands between his own and pulled it to his chest.

“Donny . . . .” Leo began, though he didn’t try to pull away.

“Tell me what you want me to do and I’ll do it,” Don said, staring into Leo’s eyes.  “Just stay with us, okay?”

He found himself leaning towards Leo, unsure of what he should do next.  Don felt as though Leo’s eyes were boring directly into his heart, seeing something there that Don himself had yet to acknowledge.

That moment slowed, time seeming to come to a standstill.  Don rather hoped that it had.

TBC…………

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