"Don't peek, it's a surprise."
"I know, you told me. I'm just adjusting the blindfold." said the mink riding on the taur's back.
"I knew I should have taken your eyes out back at the house. That would have made this much easier." Achaius said cheerfully.
"I just felt like keeping my eyes today. Plus I need eyes to see where I'm walking. Then you wouldn't have to carry me."
"It's no problem. You're super light, and you know I enjoy giving rides." said Achaius.
"Okay, but just tell me when-"

"We're here! But don't take off your blindfold just yet." said Achaius "Just climb off my back".
"Why all this secrecy?" asked the mink, awkwardly climbing off of his friend's taur back.
"You'll see." Achaius replied. Before AK knew what was happening, Achaius pulled the top of the mink's head off. The mink's brain made a wet suction cup as the dracopard popped it out.
"Wait, what's-" "-going on!" AK exclaimed. His voice sounded different at the end.
"Tada!" Achaius pulled the blindfold off, letting AK see. AK was suddenly a tall rabbit looking at himself in a mirror.

"Wha? What's?" AK stammered. He seemed to be in a fitting room of some kind of shop. Behind him, legs and arms of different furs were hanging up on the shelves. Mannequins were on display, showing off various torsos for sale. They were in a body part shop. Achaius looked really excited. He was bouncing up and down on his ankles.
"What do you think?" Asked the giddy Achaius
The new body's skullcap was crooked, only balancing on top of AK's brain. As a result, his new bunny ears were leaning far to one side. He looked down at his hands. The bunny hands were unremarkable. But this forced the former mink to see how far away the floor was. A glance back up at the mirror confirmed this thought. He was super tall now! He was too stunned to speak at first.
"Now you can be a slamball pro!" Achaius continued. His tail wagged as he looked up at his friend. "I uh.." the confused new bunny stammered. Achaius gave him a hearty slap on the back. "Well don't just stand there, sport. Take this body out for a spin!" He opened a door to an overgrown courtyard behind the shop.

AK stepped out behind Achaius. He almost ran into his friend just at a normal walking pace. He was so used to being a short mink that these new legs felt like stilts.
"Try to see if you can jump over me" the taur said before laying down on all fours.
"Oh sure!"  The mink said. These legs did feel like they had some bounce in them. He took a standing jump, easily clearing the dracopard's back. He almost stumbled over when he landed. His ears leaned back as his skullcap shifted atop his head.
This body was amazing! He felt like a spring loaded toy. He ran around the fenced in courtyard, feeling the air rush through his fur. He doubled back to his friend, this time taking a running jump. He sailed over Achaius' head.
"Woah! That's fantastic! Let's go back inside, maybe I can find a set of legs like that for me!" Achaius said as he stood up.
"That sounds good!" AK, followed his friend, but was looking down at his new feetpaws. He forgot that he had ducked through the door coming outside. Not paying attention, AK strided through the door, hitting his head on the doorframe. A panicked yell barely made it out of his mouth before his head hit the grass and his brain plopped out.

Achaius looked back at his friend. The tall bunny body was feeling the smooth neckstump where its head used to be. "Oh! Are you alright?" He scooped up his friend's brain. "Sorry, I should have warned you about that. I think that happened to this body's former owner a lot. That must have been why he traded it in." Let's just try another body for now.
He left the confused bunny body and returned to the mirror. The headless bunny body was blindly feeling around until Achaius popped the skull into another body. The headless body stopped and fell limp, like someone just turned it off remotely.

AK blinked, looking right in the eyes of an awkward scaly monster. He screamed and looked down at his hands. They were stubby little reptile hands with tiny claws.
"Sorry, I shouldn't have put that one so close to the mirror" Achaius apologized.
AK leaned back and looked at himself again. He was a skink! His smooth scales glistened under the store's fluorescent lights as he turned his head. "I'm a lizard now?" His voice sounded a little hoarse now. "Yep!" Achaius nodded and gave his friend a cup of water.
AK took the cup and tipped it back. This body had almost no lips at all, so a lot of the water just spilled out of his mouth. He looked down at the water spilled on his smooth belly scales. "Huh?" The drink had helped his dry throat, but it didn't seem to change his voice that much. That must just be what this body's voice sounded like. But that wasn't AK's concern. When he looked down, he saw that his body's slender build stopped at the waist. But past that, it looked like his body had been inflated with a pump.
He struggled to his feet and stepped back to see himself more clearly in the mirror. "Why is my butt so big?" Everything from the waist down was really fat compared to the upper body.

"The last owner switched his lower body for a taur body for a while. But when he wanted his original lower half again, it had been used by someone with a uh.. very different lifestyle. So halves had become mismatched. But I like the pear shaped look!"
AK looked down. "Pear shaped" was an understatement. His midsection looked like a table with a large centerpiece that happened to be his upper torso.
"I bet you'll be able to get this butt in shape in no time!" Achaius gave his friend's thighs a reassuring slap. The thigh jiggled a little.
"I guess it's worth a shot!" AK slowly made his way out of the changing room. He could almost hear tuba music playing as he walked through the store. Each step threw his balance forwards and backwards. He felt like a weeble wobble. He was doing his best, but this was really awkward, especially having long legs just a few minutes ago. He misjudged a step forward, and toppled over. He fell against a shelf, knocking it over.
Paws and paw accessories tumbled all over the floor. AK groaned and tried to stand up. But he ended up just falling over onto the floor. He rolled onto some socks and packs of spare beans.
"I'll clean this up! Don't worry, I got you, buddy!" Achaius rushed over and pulled his friend's head off.
"I think I should try a more normal body" AK said, "One more balanced at least." He clarified.
"You got it!" Achaius had rushed back to the changing rooms. Achaius had been excited this entire time. This little accident didn't seem to dampen his enthusiasm, but now he seemed to be moving faster.

Achaius popped the skink's skullcap off before pulling the brain out. AK felt his brain getting squished into a new empty skull. His nose was cold, and everything was dark. He opened his eyes. He was a black bear.
He shifted back, letting out a grunt of confusion.
"What do you think?" Achaius asked, putting the top of the bear's head back on. The body had been leaning against the mirror, and it had left a smeared mark where its snoot had been pressed to the glass.
This wasn't a bipedal body, or a taur one. It wasn't anthro at all. AK was just a feral black bear. "Rrwa?!" He exclaimed, getting used to talking in this body. "How did you even get this bo-". He paused and looked at his face more closely. "Is that an ear tag? Is this just a wild bear?" He said, looking down at his massive paws. The paws smelled like fast food dumpsters and had big claws.
"You said you wanted a body that was normal! This is the most normal body this place has!" Achaius exclaimed.
"That's not what I meant!" AK exclaimed, throwing up his arms. The wild swing of those big claws accidentally cut one of Achaius' arms off. "Oh no! I'm sorry, I just rwaugh!" He let out a confused roar. Maybe surprising his friend with a wild animal body wasn't a great idea when both of them were crammed into the same fitting room together.

"I'm sorry, that's fine! No, don't worry!" Achaius used his remaining arm to pop the bear's skullcap off, pushing it aside to pull AK's brain out of it. He rushed out of the room, leaving the brainless bear AK trying to stand up. 
"I have a cooler body for you to try anyways." Achaius grabbed a spare reptilian arm to replace his missing one. "You'll like this one, I promise!" He said, rushing to another fitting room. He frantically pushed the door open. AK could hear the dracopard scrambling from a distance with his hands around his brain. Then he felt his brain get plopped into something very cold and smooth. Everything went dark.

"...New neural hardware found. Interfacing bios..." AK seemed to say "..integration successful with 231 out of 246 drivers.. initiating boot sequence." Suddenly the world flickered on for AK. Achaius was standing in front of him. "Oh you look super cool! Isn't that cool?" Achaius stammered, stepping aside from the mirror. Some kind of robot prototype was staring back with three lenses instead of eyes.
AK's brain was housed in a translucent dome on the robot's head. From the waist down, he had a robotic spider body. His parts were a mix of black matte plastic and brushed metal. He naturally looked down at his hands for the fourth time today. His hands had only three fingers each, but he had an extra pair of arms to make up for it. He could hear his servos whirring with each movement. He only seemed to be able to move one pair of arms at a time.
Achaius' wagging tail kept smacking against the walls of the changing booth. "Isn't it awesome?! Come out here and see how strong you are" The dracopard backed out of the changing room. He hopped up and down outside like a dog wanting to play.
"He's so wound up today-" AK began. His body seemed to be translating his thoughts to robotic speech automatically. He didn't like that, and somehow it stopped, allowing him to say just what he wanted, and with the voice he wanted.

"Are you sure this is a good idea?" AK asked? His robotic spider legs whired and stamped along the floor in a steady but slow pace.
"It's fine! I bet you can pick up a whole shelf." he said, gesturing to a shelf stacked with boxes.
Against his better judgment, AK went along with this. He grabbed a single shelf on the large unit and lifted. The unit creaked as it was tilted up. Suddenly the shelf broke off, and the boxes of spare torsos tumbled to the floor. AK was left holding the single metal shelf one pair of his hands. "Oh no!" He exclaimed in a robotic voice.
"That's rad, your other arms do other things I think!" Achaius quickly exclaimed. He laughed nervously and ignored the mess.
AK's first set of arms held the metal shelf steady. His other set of arms looked like weird multitool drills or something. He wondered if he could somehow fix this somehow. He pressed one of these fancy 'hands' to the shelf, and heard a loud "Ca-Chunk" He had shot a rivet through the shelf, and into the wall behind it. That was really bad. But with his other arm maybe.. "FWOOSH", a jet of fire started shooting out of his other hand, slowly burning through the piece of metal in his hands. Smoke alarms started going off.
"It'sfineIgotthis!" Achaius shouted, running around and trying to silence the smoke alarms. AK's flamethrower/welding arm didn't seem to be shutting off. Achaius grabbed a fire extinguisher and blasted his friend with it. Powder filled the air, illuminated by the AK's flamethrower.
"Um... I think we have an " AK began "EMERGENCY, EMERGENCY, SEEK SHELTER!'' his robotic voice interrupted. "Yeah, that. I can't turn this off."
"Itsfinedontworryaboutit!" Achaius scrambled to pop open the brain case of his friend. He grabbed the brain with one hand and ran out of the smoke. "Seeitsfineeverythingisokay!" He yelled, charging to the front of the store. He needed a body, anything to break the connection to the robot body. He saw a spare laying behind the register. He popped the skullcap off and pressed his friend's brain inside with an audible splat. The brain landed backwards and sideways, but the eyes opened.
"Emergency! Seek.." wait.. AK blinked and felt himself. He was definitely not a robot anymore. Instinctively looking down again, he saw a pair of purple hooves instead of hands. He could see his reflection in the glass behind the counter's glass display case. He had a pony body now. Achaius had rushed off the deal with the robot body. This was a chance for the former mink to catch their breath. He adjusted his brain with a hoof.
Achaius came back with dry powder all over his fur. "I forgot that people aren't allowed to use that body. But it's fine now." He looked down at his friend in the pony body. Oh, you don't want that, I've got another body much better than that." He hurried and pulled his friend's brain out, at least using two hands this time.
But AK barely had time to say "Actually I don't mind this-" before Achaius ran through the store and disappeared outside. The door to the courtyard closed, leaving the brainless pony a moment before he'd be switched to another body. But what could possibly be outside?

He felt his brain slide into a strange crevice and everything went dark again. What was he this time? He could feel his body, but it felt stuck in something. He lifted his head slowly.
Dirt shifted off of him, and the roots of plants were ripped apart as his bulk rose from the ground. He looked down as he lifted up his gargantuan serpentine form.
His body was emerging from underground where it had been buried. Cars were stopping as he towered above the buildings. He could only catch a glimpse of his form in the reflection of an office building. He was a towering green snake adorned with feathers. The wind seemed to stir around his form.
"What is this? What am I now?" AK said with a voice like thunder.
Achaius was hanging onto the top of his head. "You're Quetzalcóatl. Isn't that cool?"
For a moment, AK was totally speechless. No possible amount of questions and answers could explain what was happening right now. He shifted his tail, accidentally crushing a couple of trees, and denting the side of a nearby building.
"I appreciate what you're doing, but I think it's time to stop this." his voice thundered again. He carefully lowered himself back to the ground. He rested his head in the massive hole in the overgrown courtyard.

Before the two of them could attract any more attention, Achaius yanked the little mink brain out of the colossal head. He rushed back into the store, kicking the door closed behind him. AK's brainless body was slumped against the wall by the changing rooms. The wind was picking up outside around the unearthed serpent out back.
Achaius quickly pressed his friend's brain back into his original head. The chaos was over. But something was wrong. His friend's brain wasn't fitting quite right in his head anymore.
It was hanging out over the edge like it had been partially deflated. Achaius had been too careless, yanking his friend's brain out and jamming it into new heads this whole time.
Now it had been flattened out of shape.

"Oh no! I'm sorry!" Achaius said, panicking. His friend's brain looked like a squished sponge. The mink's eyes were spinning around in his head. "Uh.. you just need some more juice in your brain! I can fix this!" He rushed behind the counter, holding the slightly flattened brain against his chest. He rummaged around the display shelf, and pulled down a large jar.
He opened the jar and carefully placed his friend's brain inside. He had been saving some gatorade for lunch, but his friend needed it more now. He emptied the bottle into the jar, submerging the brain in nutrition electrolytes.
The brain floated in the drink, very slowly returning to its original shape. Everything was calm, and the mink's brain was starting to feel better. AK stood up with his original mink body, and walked over to his friend.
"Why are you doing all of this?" Asked the brainless mink.
"I'm sorry. It's just that it's your birthday. And I wanted to get you something really nice. So I wanted to get you a fun new body." Achaius said, wishing things had gone better.
"Aw, that's really thoughtful of you. But you don't need to get me something that fancy. In fact, I think you've already given a perfect gift", AK said, walking up to the counter.
"I did?" Achaius looked confused.
"Yeah, this brain jar!" AK picked up the jar that was holding his brain. The outside was slightly tinted and had stars and planets on it, making it look like his brain was massive and floating in space. "I love it! This is perfect." The mink smiled.
Achaius smiled and wagged his tail. "Oh! I'm glad you like it! Happy birthday, buddy." He hugged his friend, looking really proud of himself.