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My head is empty so it echoes and echoes always a bit of it somewhere.\n\nPart of me wants to tell them it feels like I'm dying inside but the best case is I make them feel bad too. drag them down with me because I feel so alone. I don't want to make them feel even 1/5 of what I'm putting myself through but I'm impulsive. \n\nI tell one that I've been left behind and now I've made everything worse for everyone. I guess I have to take that leap and hope I don't hurt everyone else.\n\nI'm so sorry. I can't let go and bow out gracefully. am i really in my own control anymore","description_bbcode_parsed":"<span style='word-wrap: break-word;'>sometimes I can&#039;t stop crying because my brain says I was dropped by my friends years ago and I&#039;m the only one still holding on.<br /><br />I try to say it&#039;s wrong, shout it as loud as I can but my brain is louder. My head is empty so it echoes and echoes always a bit of it somewhere.<br /><br />Part of me wants to tell them it feels like I&#039;m dying inside but the best case is I make them feel bad too. drag them down with me because I feel so alone. I don&#039;t want to make them feel even 1/5 of what I&#039;m putting myself through but I&#039;m impulsive. <br /><br />I tell one that I&#039;ve been left behind and now I&#039;ve made everything worse for everyone. I guess I have to take that leap and hope I don&#039;t hurt everyone else.<br /><br />I&#039;m so sorry. I can&#039;t let go and bow out gracefully. am i really in my own control anymore</span>","writing":"","writing_bbcode_parsed":"<span style='word-wrap: break-word;'></span>","pools_count":0,"title":"I hate this","deleted":"f","public":"t","mimetype":"image/png","pagecount":"1","rating_id":"0","rating_name":"General","ratings":[],"submission_type_id":"1","type_name":"Picture/Pinup","guest_block":"f","friends_only":"f","comments_count":"0","views":"5","sales_description":null,"forsale":"f","digitalsales":"f","printsales":"f","digital_price":""}