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"writing": "[b][u][center]A Simple Security Inspection\nA Colorful Council Story\nSponsored by GlynWolf\nby Draconicon[/center][/u][/b]\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\nShe'd chosen the name 'Eeva' for this journey. Not that anyone would [i]not[/i] know her title, but the secretary bird liked to have something else for someone to use. It prevented 'Lady' this and 'Great One' that from getting peppered through conversations, and it was just faster, simpler, and saner to give them something she could answer to. Wasn't even close to the real one, which she doubted was even in government records anymore, but unexpected things could hold great value. She and the Baroness had commiserated over that quite a few times. \n\nEeva shook her head as she took a second step through the portal, a taloned foot coming to rest on the rocky promontory that oversaw her destination. A third step, and she was through, the dimensional portal slowly closing behind her like a spiraling sphincter. \n\n\"...I [i]really[/i] need a better comparison than that. Makes me feel like I got shat out of my own universe...\" \n\nShaking her head, the Lady in Yellow lifted one foot off the ground and grabbed the amethyst-stoned ring from her middle talon. A little tug pulled it free, and she looked down at the silver-banded ring as the light faded from the purple stone. When it was completely gone, she rolled the ring up and down along her fingers, dancing it across her knuckles before tossing it up and catching it again. \n\n\"Would be worth something to someone.\"\n\nNot as much as it would have been while it still had the power to cross from one dimension to another - more than one member of their Council would have loved the chance to use it to figure out where the Baron was keeping this facility, after all - but that was why the travel-rings tended to operate on single-charges. One ring, one person, one-way, one trip: that was how they had operated for years, and she didn't see it changing without half the Council getting replaced. \n\nIt was fine. She was used to it. Suspicion and fear were most of what kept her in business, after all, and business enough to dress well. She had a black suit with yellow lines and accents, golden buttons in the jacket and flecks of gold along her talons and the sides of her beak. White feathers turned gray as they ran down her body, with a yellow crest in the middle of her head. She knew her business, and she chose to dress in a way that made everyone else remember that.\n\nThe Lady in Yellow pocketed the ring, putting her hands on her hips as she turned around. Without the portal in the way, the view down to the Baron's new enterprise was completely unobstructed. The secretary bird panned her eyes over the walled facility, taking in the low communal buildings, the multiple open rings, and - was that a snack-bar? \n\nIt was. The Baron had put a snack bar in the middle of - and over there, by the main arena, public toilets? And a carousel? And - \n\n'Eeva' sighed, rubbing her forehead before her hand traveled down to her beak, pinching the space just above the holes. One deep breath after another, she told herself. She had thought she was coming to take a look at a military training center, not a theme park based around a bunch of meatheads breaking skulls. \n\nShe should have asked more questions, but so long as the Baron was still willing to meet with her - \n\n\"Ma'am.\"\n\n\"...Were you trying to sneak up behind me?\"\n\n\"Yes.\"\n\n\"Good job, then,\" the Lady in Yellow said, turning around. \"But next time, make sure that you're ready with a weapon or something; the cliff's pretty survivable from where I'm standing.\"\n\nShe laid eyes on the security force sent to collect her. Led by a bull but mostly filled out with pigs and boars, they looked like a sturdy-enough bunch, each of them wearing at least three layers of protective armor - she'd guess something padded at the core, something stiff in the middle, and something reflective for the outer layer - and all of them had a pistol at their hips, a rifle over their backs, and a decent pair of stun-gloves for hand-to-hand submission. \n\n\"Looks like the Baron didn't skimp on you - well, not on your gear, at least,\" she muttered. \n\n\"What does thaaaat...meeeaaaaaaaan...\"\n\nThe bull's voice slowed as 'Eeva' touched her power. It was so simple these days; what once took meditation and concentration to focus on the 'key' now took little more than whim of desire. In the space of a blink, the secretary bird went from seeing the world as everyone else did to seeing the people in it in symbols. \n\nNumbers. Currency markers. Fantasies. Desires. Wants. Needs. Hungers. Necessities. \n\nPrices, in other words. In every silhouette before her, she saw the price of someone's loyalty, and beneath that, the price of every other request she could make. It flitted by faster than a universal stock exchange into a computer, but she got the gist of it. That pig was so enamored of his position that it would take millions to make him betray his boss; the prestige of working for the Baron was enough to fill in whatever gaps there were in the pay structure. The boar behind the bull was cheaper, wanting a couple hundred thousand, a trip off-world, and - oh, and he would want to have a male slut that he could fuck, that was interesting; someone that could be tempted by sex was always a weak point, and the bull - \n\n\"I always have an opening for a killer,\" she said, closing her eyes and opening them again as the power faded, the moment passing so quickly that he hadn't even finished his sentence. \"Care to join me?\"\n\n\"Is that a serious offer?\" \n\n\"No, but you were seriously interested,\" the Lady in Yellow said, shaking her head. \"Arrest him.\"\n\nThe rest of the team moved as she took a step back. There’d been just enough eagerness in his voice for it to be believable. Not that she needed proof, but others often did. \n\nShe wasn't surprised that the bull managed to stun one boar and one pig before he went down - he wasn't weak, just stupid - but she still shook her head that she was finding gaps in security that quickly. She stepped over the fallen, twitching bull and looked the perverted boar in the eye. \n\n\"You're next in command.\"\n\n\"Uh, yes, uh, Lady, I am, how -\"\n\n\"That wasn't a question. How long is the walk to the Baron's office?\"\n\n\"Thirty minutes, give or take.\"\n\n\"I hope that there's proper roads down there, instead of rough terrain like this cliff,\" she said, gesturing around them. \n\n\"Uh, with respect, uh - Eeva?\" \n\n\"Yes, yes.\"\n\n\"The Baron [i]is[/i] training us to fight in all kinds of terrain. A bit of road would take away from that.\"\n\n\"...Wonderful.\"\n\nThe secretary bird sighed. She had hoped that the whole situation would be less rugged and more regal. After all, the Baron was at least mid-ranking in the Council; he should have had somewhat higher standards than this. \n\nAt the same time, she understood the reasoning. A better product would be made if they didn't pamper them too much. Some, yes, in the right places - food, mild recreation, and proper bathing facilities - but not all over. And if they were going to be used for military or security forces on other worlds, in a variety of different climates and geographical situations, then it was best for them to get used to rougher living and transit. She just wished she'd known enough to bring some sort of shoes. \n\n\"Well, it can't be helped. Take me to him.\" \n\n\"Yes, ma'am.\"\n\n\"And just keep to Eeva.\" She shook her head. \"The title sounds wrong coming from you, and ma'am makes me feel old.\"\n\n#\n\nIt was worse than she thought. \n\nWhile she had mockingly thought of the facility as a theme park, it was as if the Baron had heard the phrase 'Gang-Land' and decided to make it into just that. From the high concrete walls that were topped with bright reds and yellows to the 'testing' rides just inside the gates that spun round and round and round until candidates threw up, Eeva found herself confronted with devices that were more suitable for the delights of children than they were for the training of soldiers. \n\nShe walked with delicate steps, only somewhat because of the long, sore walk down from the cliff-face, and cursed under her breath when she felt soreness creeping up her legs every so often. Here, there was a stand selling food, fried meats and sweets that meant nothing. There, a shell game going on, run by staff officers that were trying to short-change the trainees. Along the great main road that ran from the gate to the huge tent in the middle of the facility, she saw dozens and dozens of booths and vendors that all but blocked out the training arenas just behind them, and each one was staffed with either a sharp-toothed, long-clawed thug or by one of the few veterans that should have been training the idiots around them. \n\nIt was a mess, a very loud mess. \n\n\"The Baron looks to be running more of a circus than a training ground,\" she muttered to the boar who'd taken charge. \"This can't be profitable for him.\"\n\n\"He's doing alright,\" the boar muttered, shrugging. \n\n\"Really? Have you seen the numbers?\"\n\n\"Long as I keep getting paid, I just assume we're doing alright.\"\n\n[i]And that's why you're here, I suppose.[/i]\n\nThe Lady in Yellow bit back the venom that she wanted to spit at the security team. It wouldn't go anywhere useful; she'd already had them apprehend the useless idiot that had been running their little squad, and that had gone reasonably well, but she doubted that any further critique would go anywhere. She needed to hear from the Baron just what in the hell was going on here. \n\nMore to the point, she had to keep her eyes open and her power on. \n\nEvery few steps, she would blink and look at the new people in her line of sight. Time slipped and flowed, slowing and starting again in rushes that were almost too fast for her to keep up with. It had been some time since she had used it so often and so rapidly, but she didn't have time to go through everyone in an interview room. This was going to be a short visit. \n\nThe soldiers around here were fine. Getting one of them to turn on the Baron would cost more than it was worth, and they were afraid enough that their prices were climbing. Her little show had boosted the boar from a couple hundred thousand and a male-slut to a million and a half, and that would only be enough for him. Anyone that wanted to try and pull a trick on the Baron would need at least four squads the size of the one that was escorting her, and if they were going to try and bribe security, that was going to break the bank. \n\nBut there were more avenues of attack than just security. \n\nIn the slowed-times, she looked at the staff. Not just the training officers - they were low-risk by nature, well-paid, unlikely to be tempted by anything less than a large sum - but there were others that had different concerns. Her eyes went to the janitors, the maintenance staff, and the engineers that had to work on the different traps in the arenas. The secretary bird scoped out the grumblers, the complainers, looking at them and processing them as they kept walking. \n\nBy the time they reached the central tent, she'd found three different causes for concern. None that would be eager to betray the Baron, even for a large bribe, but none of them would be that hard to bribe to just let someone in. Nobody important, just...one little lost key. That was all that they'd have to give up. \n\nAnd that was cheap. Very cheap. \n\nThe security squad led her under the big top. As she expected, a central fighting arena took up the middle of the tent. Three men, one woman were duking it out, throwing punches and dodging them, spin-kicking and rolling out of the way. They moved at speed, and with enough of it to tell her that these were the current elite. \n\nWhich meant that the Baron was somewhere in the stands. She glanced up and to her right, and sure enough, she caught his signature flash of purple toward the top of the seats. \n\n\"There he is,\" she muttered. \n\n\"Ma'am?\" \n\n\"Don't call me that,\" she said, pushing around the boar. \"I know my way from here.\"\n\n\"But - Eeva -\"\n\n\"I said, I know the way. Besides, he knows I'm here.\"\n\nShe could feel it. The Council always could; when they were near enough, when someone else with a 'key' was in the area, they were [i]very[/i] aware of it. The only reason that it had taken her a second to feel him was because she was so tired from looking around and processing all the numbers she'd taken in. If she'd been at the top of her game -\n\n[i]It's fine. I was invited here, he knows I'm coming, nothing wrong with that.[/i]\n\nNot that she was afraid. Not of anything serious, at least. She had a ring of her own to get back home and that would work in an instant. And the Baron wasn't one that lashed out at people...for the most part, at least. \n\nBut there was always something to be wary of when one Council member visited another. While it was in their common interests to not get in each other's way and cause problems, and certainly in their shared interests to not outright attack each other, it wasn't unknown for it to happen anyway. Recently, the Lord in Lavender had been beaten by the Person in Red, and there were talks between the other Council members about whether a demotion was in order for the former. \n\nBut that was an uncommon thing, she told herself. Uncommon, and unlikely to happen now. \n\nShe was halfway up the long rows of steps before the boar turned his attention to her. Dressed in a cheap purple suit that showed no quality at all, he was just an inch shorter than her, but with far more heft to his frame. She was a slender, scrawny sort of thing, while the boar had the meat to him that good living brought. He chuckled, waving her up with a large hand covered in amethyst brass knuckles, and she kept climbing up the steps until she stood at the end of his row. \n\n\"Baron,\" she said. \n\n\"Heh, it's Gunnar here,\" the boar said, sitting with one leg crossed over his lap. \"You?\"\n\n\"Eeva.\"\n\n\"Nice to see ya. Take a seat. It's getting good.\"\n\n\"I'm sure.\"\n\n\"Come on. Can't deny that you're curious, eh?\"\n\n\"Not about them, but fine.\"\n\nThe secretary bird joined her colleague on the bench and looked at the arena. Though it was further away now than it had been at ground level, she had a better view of the fighters. The three males - a bull and two horses - and the female - a falcon - were in fierce combat. They lunged, pulled away, and then darted in again, always with a new target, never pushing someone so hard that they gave another opponent an opening. The free-for-all was surprisingly well-balanced. \n\n\"Are they your best?\" she asked. \n\n\"Eh, in the top fifty. Champion's busy at the moment.\"\n\n\"Why are you watching them, then?\"\n\n\"Because they're looking to move up. Gotta see if they're ready.\"\n\n\"Hmm. And the business venture as a whole?\"\n\n\"Six contracts. Four security, one merc, one private,\" he said, shrugging. \n\n\"And the pay?\"\n\n\"Heh. Why don't you look at me and find out?\"\n\nShe could, though it wouldn't give her an exact number. She couldn't see what someone already had, just what their standards were, and what their morals would let them accept. If he was doing well, she'd see a few indicators in his prices for other favors, but not anything distinct. Eeva shook her head, looking back at the fight. \n\n\"You're hard to read, anyway.\"\n\n\"Heh, you mean I'm cheap.\"\n\n\"Easy, I was going to say.\"\n\n\"Ha! That, too.\"\n\nThey didn't speak for a time. Despite her earlier disinterest, Eeva watched the fight with her head cocked to the side, drawn in with a fascination that she didn't expect. She didn't know enough about fighting to know whether the trainees in the arena were good, but she was aware enough of value to know that they were going to be dangerous against the right people. They were fast, and they reacted to new threats quicker than she could see them coming. When one horse was busy fighting the falcon, the bull lunged for him, only for the horse to shift focus immediately. He blocked, dodged, rolled, pushing the bull to fight the falcon, only for the other horse to grab him and force him into a contested grapple. \n\nThe fight moved faster than she could follow, but the warriors were refusing to go down. One would give the other the slip, and there'd be a precious few seconds of quiet where her mind slowly caught up to everything that had happened before they were at it again. \n\n\"It'll be the falcon,\" the Baron in Purple said, shaking his head. \"Gotta be.\"\n\n\"You're betting on that?\"\n\n\"Heh, you got something to wager?\"\n\n\"...If it wasn't this, I might,\" she admitted, shaking her head. \"But I'm not going to guess on a fight. Not with people you know and I don't.\"\n\n\"Heh, where's your sense of fun, girl?\"\n\n\"Somewhere in the dumpster with my sense of risk.\"\n\n\"Eh, to each their own.\" The boar grunted, stretching his arms overhead before resting them on the back of their seats. \"So, seen anything dangerous yet?\"\n\n\"That depends.\"\n\n\"Yeah?\"\n\n\"Has your check hit my account yet?\"\n\n\"Oh, come on. You know I'm good for it.\"\n\n\"I'm waiting for the money, thanks.\"\n\n\"Heh, come on. You can gimme one.\"\n\n\"Fine.\"\n\nRolling her eyes, she looked at him. Time slipped, the Baron started to raise his hand, but she had already seen what she needed to see. She closed her eyes and opened them again, gripping the seat beneath her as time sped up and nearly yanked her along with it. \n\n\"You're hungry enough that you'd pay me 159 credits for a sandwich right now, if it was a good one from the fried-food stall four booths down.\"\n\n\"...Goddamn! Really?\" 'Gunnar' laughed, slapping his stomach. \"Fuck, I knew I was getting bad, but fuck my wallet, right?\"\n\n\"Heh. You always were one with poor impulse control,\" she said, her beak tilting in an unwilling smile.\n\n\"Poor impulse control? Yeah, that'd be the cotton candy for $50. A fried sandwich for $159? That's just being a fucking idiot.\"\n\nTHUMP!\n\nEeva whipped her eyes back to the arena just in time to see both of the horses go down. The falcon and the bull were the only ones still standing, the former barely five feet and the latter topping seven and a half. He had long horns that stuck out of the sides of his head, and she had her wings that were spattered and speckled with blood. Not likely to be able to fly with those. \n\n\"Still betting on the falcon?\" she asked. \n\n\"Mm-hmmm. Come on. Let's get that sandwich,\" Gunnar said, pushing himself to his feet. \n\n\"But what about -\"\n\n\"Yeah, I already know who's getting a promotion.\"\n\n\"Then why aren't you stopping it?\"\n\n\"Because they don't need to know I know.\"\n\n#\n\nTo give Gunnar credit, the food at the stalls [i]was[/i] good. Luxurious, no, but with the burst of melted cheese, meat with the fat melting through it and dripping into the crispy bread and the faint taste of something pickled mixed into the whole thing, it was still tasty enough to enjoy. She ate one and a half, and passed the rest of it to the boar. He would finish it, she had no doubt. Probably without even getting any of the grease on his suit, somehow, which she still didn't understand how he managed. \n\n\"So, are there any [i]particular[/i] threats that you want me to look for?\" she asked, leaning against the wall of a quieter training arena. \n\n\"Just anyone that's looking bored or angry,\" the Baron said, shrugging. \"I do what I can, but you know how it is. There's always some asshole that thinks they've got a better idea of how to run things. See, if they'd just come and talk to me -\"\n\n\"You are a rather imposing individual, you know,\" she said. \n\n\"Yeah, me and my fat ass are all kinds of scary.\"\n\nShe arched an eyebrow. While the boar certainly had the heft that might make most people think that he was too chubby to take seriously, a second glance was all it took to notice that most of that gut didn't actually move, and that his pecs were about as hard as they could get. Thick arms and legs, hard tusks that stuck out just enough for those points to be a danger, and his height and build guaranteed that he'd be a threat to anyone that didn't know how to fight, and most people that did. \n\nAnd that was before they even got to his 'key.' Hers was Bribery, knowing what it took to get someone to do something that they hadn't worked up the guts or the decision to do. His, on the other hand, was Assault, as in, Assault and Battery. Even a single touch was enough to hurt someone, and he seldom held back from going further. \n\nCouldn't kill, though. And that was what scared the smart people. \n\nIt took three seconds of her staring at him for him to finally break down and chuckle. He lowered his half-eaten sandwich to his side and shook his head. \n\n\"Guess I can't pull that one on you, heh.\"\n\n\"No. No, you can't,\" she said, this time not bothering to fight the smile. \n\n\"Yeah, yeah. I know, I ain't that easy to talk to. But shit, I try. Try harder than Lavender does, the arrogant little -\"\n\n\"He's already being sorted out by the rest of the Council,\" she said, shaking her head. \"We're talking about you.\"\n\n\"Yeah, yeah. I know. Appreciate this, by the way,\" he said, gesturing at her with the remains of the sandwich. \"Still paying you, still appreciate it. Not every Council member's willing to do a consult, even for a favor, or for cash.\"\n\n\"Yes, well, it's worth it.\"\n\nNot often that she got compliments on her skill, either. Before she could take it further, a few soft beeps caught her ear. She reached into her pocket, tilting a small gem to the side and running the edge of her thumb against it.\n\n\"Gems now, eh?\" he muttered between bites. \n\n\"Gems for this bank, at least; circuits running in the gemstone markers.\" She nodded. \"Looks like your payment just came through. I'll take a more thorough look through your staff in a minute, but my first recommendations are these. Fire that possum janitor -\"\n\n\"What, Yakes? He's good.\"\n\n\"He's also pissed off at the fighters; I'd guess that he took this job because he didn't have much else to turn to, but the way that he was looking at them, he's got some grudge on his shoulder. All it'd take for him to leave the door open and let someone sneak in is the promise to sabotage the rings or break the legs of a few fighters.\"\n\n\"Fuuuuuuuck. You know how hard it is to find someone that's actually [i]good[/i] at cleaning on that scale?\"\n\n\"You can choose whether you follow my advice or not, but that's what I recommend with him.\"\n\n\"Ugh. Okay, okay, I'll look into it and see what I can do. Anyone else?”\n\nShe nodded. Gunnar groaned. \n\n\"Okay, hit me with it. Who next?\"\n\n\"Two maintenance staff.\" \n\nThe Baron winced. \n\n\"You can't [i]seriously[/i] be that hard-up for people fixing things,\" the Lady in Yellow said, raising an eyebrow. \"I would understand not getting rid of your top trainees, but maintenance -\"\n\n\"Yeaaaaaaah, I didn't spend that much time vetting maintenance; it was, heh, boring.\"\n\n\"...\"\n\n\"Yeah, yeah, say it.\"\n\n\"You're an idiot.\"\n\n\"Mea culpa.\"\n\n\"An idiot that speaks Latin, then,\" she muttered, rubbing her forehead. \"I'll put them in the report. For now, I need to take a walk and see who else will be trouble.\"\n\n\"You do that. And Eeva?\"\n\n\"What?\"\n\n\"Appreciate you, girl.\"\n\n“You already said that.”\n\n“Yeah, well, I’m saying it again because I mean it that much, okay? Take the compliment, Lady. Not like you get a lot of ‘em, but ain’t gonna hurt you to take it now. Trust me; I know when people hurt from this shit.”\n\n“I bet you do.”\n\n“Heh. Don’t work too hard, and have more food if you need! I’ve told ‘em to make sure that you get it for free. Maybe you’ll give me a discount next time!”\n\nWaving him off, the secretary bird returned to the main street of the facility. Much as she had been judgmental of the whole set-up, now that she had had a little time to think about it and calm down with the Baron, she understood how it was supposed to work. \n\n[i]Set up like a circus, one big tent in the middle, four main-streets of 'attractions' running out from it, and training rings for different shows running outward from there,[/i] she thought, holding the lay-out in her head. [i]And he's set it up so that only the best 'performers' get under the big-top. The closer you get, the better the attractions. Only a few games toward the walls, but you graduate from those outer training circles - and you can see everyone fighting from there, so you can pick up tricks - the further in you get...[/i]\n\nMore than that, each ring seemed to have its own group, like a gang or a team that had formed out of those that had pride in being there. She'd seen the politicking in roughest form while walking around, and the way that some 'gangs' took control of different stretches of food and game attractions on the main paths meant that they'd favor their own 'ring' over the others. \n\nBut the politics only mattered in a secondary way. What really mattered was who was in charge, who stood to gain, and who stood to lose. \n\nThe Lady in Yellow eliminated half of the staff and trainees right off the bat. Those that were in the middle of the hierarchy had very little to gain for the most part. They weren't on the verge of pushing through to the next ring or at risk of falling down to the previous ones. They had comfort, they had their own level of prestige, and there was almost nothing that they'd get by letting someone else break the rules. They were more keen on protecting what they had rather than trying to get more, and that meant that they'd be harder to convince to do anything stupid. She could ignore most of them. \n\nThe outer-rings, the ones with the lowest-ranking fighters, weren't too much of a concern, either. There might be a few that would want a better offer, particularly if they'd been stuck for a while or assumed they were better than they were, but they'd be ambitious, pricy to get on your side. They'd want something that most outsiders wouldn't want to pay. Upward movement, not lateral. There'd be some concerns there, but not so many as there would be elsewhere. Staff were similar; there'd be outliers, but most of them would have some security here and wouldn't really have that many bones to pick. She'd have Gunnar get her the records for who had been on the roster for the longest, and the newest ones to be added, and that would cover the biggest risks. \n\nBut the real problems...\n\nShe looked toward the inner rings. Those that had risen to the top were always the ones most at risk for looking for another pay-out. Not because they were suffering, but because they had gotten addicted to being up there, and wanted another scrap, and another, and another. They loved that feeling of being up there, and when climbing higher got harder, they would get greedy, even desperate for someone to push them up that little bit further. \n\nIn her experience, the rich - whether in status, experience, or simple wealth - were always cheaper to buy than the poor. By and large, it took surprisingly little to get them to do something. \n\nJust as she took a step toward the inner rings, the loudspeaker wailed. She looked up - \n\n\"[i]Ladies and gentlemen, the Champion is emerging from the central tent and coming to ring 1A. Assemble for the show of the day![/i]\"\n\nEeva cocked her head to the side as she turned to the big tent just in time to see the orca walking out of the massive structure. Dressed in no more than a speedo, like some overconfident wrestler, he walked out with his arms over his head, holding them up to accept the cheers of some of the other top-rank fighters, and - \n\n[i]Ooooooh, my...[/i]\n\nShe looked at him with her power, and she saw nothing. No price, no desires, no nothing. \n\n[i]Well, well, well...you've already been bought...[/i]\n\nBecause that was what a 'nothing' meant. When she looked at someone that was already doing what they wanted to do, the price to 'bribe' them was never '0.' It was more like a sense of non-existence, like it was impossible to encourage them further into doing what they already wanted to do. When the price was cheap, it never rounded down to zero, because there was always that little thing that someone could do to push the other over the edge to doing the thing. \n\nWhen '0' was visible, that meant that the price had been met. Someone, somewhere, had already bought the champion's loyalty, and it wasn't Gunnar. \n\n[i]Well, well, well...looks like my price just went up...[/i]\n\nIt hadn't, of course. That would have been against the deal that they had. But Gunnar was just enough of a sap that she was pretty sure that he'd throw on a tip once she brought this one up. Having your best fighter be the one that got bought by someone else? That'd hurt. \n\nShe almost pitied him. Almost. \n\nEeva shook her head, made a mental note of the whole thing, and kept walking. There were still quite a few people in the top rank to go through, and she doubted that she'd have time to see them all if she didn't get moving now. She still had to earn that paycheck, after all; she had standards to keep. \n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n[b][u][center]The End[/center][/u][/b]\n\nSummary: A little show of what some of the Colorful Council are like, and what they do with each other. \n\nTags: No Sex, Fighting, Fighters, Secretary Bird, Boar, Pig, Various Species, Super Villains, Colorful Council, Lore, Character Work, Sci-Fi, Fantasy, Various Genre Bits, ",
"writing_bbcode_parsed": "
A Simple Security Inspection A Colorful Council Story Sponsored by GlynWolf by Draconicon
She'd chosen the name 'Eeva' for this journey. Not that anyone would not know her title, but the secretary bird liked to have something else for someone to use. It prevented 'Lady' this and 'Great One' that from getting peppered through conversations, and it was just faster, simpler, and saner to give them something she could answer to. Wasn't even close to the real one, which she doubted was even in government records anymore, but unexpected things could hold great value. She and the Baroness had commiserated over that quite a few times.
Eeva shook her head as she took a second step through the portal, a taloned foot coming to rest on the rocky promontory that oversaw her destination. A third step, and she was through, the dimensional portal slowly closing behind her like a spiraling sphincter.
"...I really need a better comparison than that. Makes me feel like I got shat out of my own universe..."
Shaking her head, the Lady in Yellow lifted one foot off the ground and grabbed the amethyst-stoned ring from her middle talon. A little tug pulled it free, and she looked down at the silver-banded ring as the light faded from the purple stone. When it was completely gone, she rolled the ring up and down along her fingers, dancing it across her knuckles before tossing it up and catching it again.
"Would be worth something to someone."
Not as much as it would have been while it still had the power to cross from one dimension to another - more than one member of their Council would have loved the chance to use it to figure out where the Baron was keeping this facility, after all - but that was why the travel-rings tended to operate on single-charges. One ring, one person, one-way, one trip: that was how they had operated for years, and she didn't see it changing without half the Council getting replaced.
It was fine. She was used to it. Suspicion and fear were most of what kept her in business, after all, and business enough to dress well. She had a black suit with yellow lines and accents, golden buttons in the jacket and flecks of gold along her talons and the sides of her beak. White feathers turned gray as they ran down her body, with a yellow crest in the middle of her head. She knew her business, and she chose to dress in a way that made everyone else remember that.
The Lady in Yellow pocketed the ring, putting her hands on her hips as she turned around. Without the portal in the way, the view down to the Baron's new enterprise was completely unobstructed. The secretary bird panned her eyes over the walled facility, taking in the low communal buildings, the multiple open rings, and - was that a snack-bar?
It was. The Baron had put a snack bar in the middle of - and over there, by the main arena, public toilets? And a carousel? And -
'Eeva' sighed, rubbing her forehead before her hand traveled down to her beak, pinching the space just above the holes. One deep breath after another, she told herself. She had thought she was coming to take a look at a military training center, not a theme park based around a bunch of meatheads breaking skulls.
She should have asked more questions, but so long as the Baron was still willing to meet with her -
"Ma'am."
"...Were you trying to sneak up behind me?"
"Yes."
"Good job, then," the Lady in Yellow said, turning around. "But next time, make sure that you're ready with a weapon or something; the cliff's pretty survivable from where I'm standing."
She laid eyes on the security force sent to collect her. Led by a bull but mostly filled out with pigs and boars, they looked like a sturdy-enough bunch, each of them wearing at least three layers of protective armor - she'd guess something padded at the core, something stiff in the middle, and something reflective for the outer layer - and all of them had a pistol at their hips, a rifle over their backs, and a decent pair of stun-gloves for hand-to-hand submission.
"Looks like the Baron didn't skimp on you - well, not on your gear, at least," she muttered.
"What does thaaaat...meeeaaaaaaaan..."
The bull's voice slowed as 'Eeva' touched her power. It was so simple these days; what once took meditation and concentration to focus on the 'key' now took little more than whim of desire. In the space of a blink, the secretary bird went from seeing the world as everyone else did to seeing the people in it in symbols.
Prices, in other words. In every silhouette before her, she saw the price of someone's loyalty, and beneath that, the price of every other request she could make. It flitted by faster than a universal stock exchange into a computer, but she got the gist of it. That pig was so enamored of his position that it would take millions to make him betray his boss; the prestige of working for the Baron was enough to fill in whatever gaps there were in the pay structure. The boar behind the bull was cheaper, wanting a couple hundred thousand, a trip off-world, and - oh, and he would want to have a male slut that he could fuck, that was interesting; someone that could be tempted by sex was always a weak point, and the bull -
"I always have an opening for a killer," she said, closing her eyes and opening them again as the power faded, the moment passing so quickly that he hadn't even finished his sentence. "Care to join me?"
"Is that a serious offer?"
"No, but you were seriously interested," the Lady in Yellow said, shaking her head. "Arrest him."
The rest of the team moved as she took a step back. There’d been just enough eagerness in his voice for it to be believable. Not that she needed proof, but others often did.
She wasn't surprised that the bull managed to stun one boar and one pig before he went down - he wasn't weak, just stupid - but she still shook her head that she was finding gaps in security that quickly. She stepped over the fallen, twitching bull and looked the perverted boar in the eye.
"You're next in command."
"Uh, yes, uh, Lady, I am, how -"
"That wasn't a question. How long is the walk to the Baron's office?"
"Thirty minutes, give or take."
"I hope that there's proper roads down there, instead of rough terrain like this cliff," she said, gesturing around them.
"Uh, with respect, uh - Eeva?"
"Yes, yes."
"The Baron is training us to fight in all kinds of terrain. A bit of road would take away from that."
"...Wonderful."
The secretary bird sighed. She had hoped that the whole situation would be less rugged and more regal. After all, the Baron was at least mid-ranking in the Council; he should have had somewhat higher standards than this.
At the same time, she understood the reasoning. A better product would be made if they didn't pamper them too much. Some, yes, in the right places - food, mild recreation, and proper bathing facilities - but not all over. And if they were going to be used for military or security forces on other worlds, in a variety of different climates and geographical situations, then it was best for them to get used to rougher living and transit. She just wished she'd known enough to bring some sort of shoes.
"Well, it can't be helped. Take me to him."
"Yes, ma'am."
"And just keep to Eeva." She shook her head. "The title sounds wrong coming from you, and ma'am makes me feel old."
#
It was worse than she thought.
While she had mockingly thought of the facility as a theme park, it was as if the Baron had heard the phrase 'Gang-Land' and decided to make it into just that. From the high concrete walls that were topped with bright reds and yellows to the 'testing' rides just inside the gates that spun round and round and round until candidates threw up, Eeva found herself confronted with devices that were more suitable for the delights of children than they were for the training of soldiers.
She walked with delicate steps, only somewhat because of the long, sore walk down from the cliff-face, and cursed under her breath when she felt soreness creeping up her legs every so often. Here, there was a stand selling food, fried meats and sweets that meant nothing. There, a shell game going on, run by staff officers that were trying to short-change the trainees. Along the great main road that ran from the gate to the huge tent in the middle of the facility, she saw dozens and dozens of booths and vendors that all but blocked out the training arenas just behind them, and each one was staffed with either a sharp-toothed, long-clawed thug or by one of the few veterans that should have been training the idiots around them.
It was a mess, a very loud mess.
"The Baron looks to be running more of a circus than a training ground," she muttered to the boar who'd taken charge. "This can't be profitable for him."
"He's doing alright," the boar muttered, shrugging.
"Really? Have you seen the numbers?"
"Long as I keep getting paid, I just assume we're doing alright."
And that's why you're here, I suppose.
The Lady in Yellow bit back the venom that she wanted to spit at the security team. It wouldn't go anywhere useful; she'd already had them apprehend the useless idiot that had been running their little squad, and that had gone reasonably well, but she doubted that any further critique would go anywhere. She needed to hear from the Baron just what in the hell was going on here.
More to the point, she had to keep her eyes open and her power on.
Every few steps, she would blink and look at the new people in her line of sight. Time slipped and flowed, slowing and starting again in rushes that were almost too fast for her to keep up with. It had been some time since she had used it so often and so rapidly, but she didn't have time to go through everyone in an interview room. This was going to be a short visit.
The soldiers around here were fine. Getting one of them to turn on the Baron would cost more than it was worth, and they were afraid enough that their prices were climbing. Her little show had boosted the boar from a couple hundred thousand and a male-slut to a million and a half, and that would only be enough for him. Anyone that wanted to try and pull a trick on the Baron would need at least four squads the size of the one that was escorting her, and if they were going to try and bribe security, that was going to break the bank.
But there were more avenues of attack than just security.
In the slowed-times, she looked at the staff. Not just the training officers - they were low-risk by nature, well-paid, unlikely to be tempted by anything less than a large sum - but there were others that had different concerns. Her eyes went to the janitors, the maintenance staff, and the engineers that had to work on the different traps in the arenas. The secretary bird scoped out the grumblers, the complainers, looking at them and processing them as they kept walking.
By the time they reached the central tent, she'd found three different causes for concern. None that would be eager to betray the Baron, even for a large bribe, but none of them would be that hard to bribe to just let someone in. Nobody important, just...one little lost key. That was all that they'd have to give up.
And that was cheap. Very cheap.
The security squad led her under the big top. As she expected, a central fighting arena took up the middle of the tent. Three men, one woman were duking it out, throwing punches and dodging them, spin-kicking and rolling out of the way. They moved at speed, and with enough of it to tell her that these were the current elite.
Which meant that the Baron was somewhere in the stands. She glanced up and to her right, and sure enough, she caught his signature flash of purple toward the top of the seats.
"There he is," she muttered.
"Ma'am?"
"Don't call me that," she said, pushing around the boar. "I know my way from here."
"But - Eeva -"
"I said, I know the way. Besides, he knows I'm here."
She could feel it. The Council always could; when they were near enough, when someone else with a 'key' was in the area, they were very aware of it. The only reason that it had taken her a second to feel him was because she was so tired from looking around and processing all the numbers she'd taken in. If she'd been at the top of her game -
It's fine. I was invited here, he knows I'm coming, nothing wrong with that.
Not that she was afraid. Not of anything serious, at least. She had a ring of her own to get back home and that would work in an instant. And the Baron wasn't one that lashed out at people...for the most part, at least.
But there was always something to be wary of when one Council member visited another. While it was in their common interests to not get in each other's way and cause problems, and certainly in their shared interests to not outright attack each other, it wasn't unknown for it to happen anyway. Recently, the Lord in Lavender had been beaten by the Person in Red, and there were talks between the other Council members about whether a demotion was in order for the former.
But that was an uncommon thing, she told herself. Uncommon, and unlikely to happen now.
She was halfway up the long rows of steps before the boar turned his attention to her. Dressed in a cheap purple suit that showed no quality at all, he was just an inch shorter than her, but with far more heft to his frame. She was a slender, scrawny sort of thing, while the boar had the meat to him that good living brought. He chuckled, waving her up with a large hand covered in amethyst brass knuckles, and she kept climbing up the steps until she stood at the end of his row.
"Baron," she said.
"Heh, it's Gunnar here," the boar said, sitting with one leg crossed over his lap. "You?"
"Eeva."
"Nice to see ya. Take a seat. It's getting good."
"I'm sure."
"Come on. Can't deny that you're curious, eh?"
"Not about them, but fine."
The secretary bird joined her colleague on the bench and looked at the arena. Though it was further away now than it had been at ground level, she had a better view of the fighters. The three males - a bull and two horses - and the female - a falcon - were in fierce combat. They lunged, pulled away, and then darted in again, always with a new target, never pushing someone so hard that they gave another opponent an opening. The free-for-all was surprisingly well-balanced.
"Are they your best?" she asked.
"Eh, in the top fifty. Champion's busy at the moment."
"Why are you watching them, then?"
"Because they're looking to move up. Gotta see if they're ready."
"Hmm. And the business venture as a whole?"
"Six contracts. Four security, one merc, one private," he said, shrugging.
"And the pay?"
"Heh. Why don't you look at me and find out?"
She could, though it wouldn't give her an exact number. She couldn't see what someone already had, just what their standards were, and what their morals would let them accept. If he was doing well, she'd see a few indicators in his prices for other favors, but not anything distinct. Eeva shook her head, looking back at the fight.
"You're hard to read, anyway."
"Heh, you mean I'm cheap."
"Easy, I was going to say."
"Ha! That, too."
They didn't speak for a time. Despite her earlier disinterest, Eeva watched the fight with her head cocked to the side, drawn in with a fascination that she didn't expect. She didn't know enough about fighting to know whether the trainees in the arena were good, but she was aware enough of value to know that they were going to be dangerous against the right people. They were fast, and they reacted to new threats quicker than she could see them coming. When one horse was busy fighting the falcon, the bull lunged for him, only for the horse to shift focus immediately. He blocked, dodged, rolled, pushing the bull to fight the falcon, only for the other horse to grab him and force him into a contested grapple.
The fight moved faster than she could follow, but the warriors were refusing to go down. One would give the other the slip, and there'd be a precious few seconds of quiet where her mind slowly caught up to everything that had happened before they were at it again.
"It'll be the falcon," the Baron in Purple said, shaking his head. "Gotta be."
"You're betting on that?"
"Heh, you got something to wager?"
"...If it wasn't this, I might," she admitted, shaking her head. "But I'm not going to guess on a fight. Not with people you know and I don't."
"Heh, where's your sense of fun, girl?"
"Somewhere in the dumpster with my sense of risk."
"Eh, to each their own." The boar grunted, stretching his arms overhead before resting them on the back of their seats. "So, seen anything dangerous yet?"
"That depends."
"Yeah?"
"Has your check hit my account yet?"
"Oh, come on. You know I'm good for it."
"I'm waiting for the money, thanks."
"Heh, come on. You can gimme one."
"Fine."
Rolling her eyes, she looked at him. Time slipped, the Baron started to raise his hand, but she had already seen what she needed to see. She closed her eyes and opened them again, gripping the seat beneath her as time sped up and nearly yanked her along with it.
"You're hungry enough that you'd pay me 159 credits for a sandwich right now, if it was a good one from the fried-food stall four booths down."
"...Goddamn! Really?" 'Gunnar' laughed, slapping his stomach. "Fuck, I knew I was getting bad, but fuck my wallet, right?"
"Heh. You always were one with poor impulse control," she said, her beak tilting in an unwilling smile.
"Poor impulse control? Yeah, that'd be the cotton candy for $50. A fried sandwich for $159? That's just being a fucking idiot."
THUMP!
Eeva whipped her eyes back to the arena just in time to see both of the horses go down. The falcon and the bull were the only ones still standing, the former barely five feet and the latter topping seven and a half. He had long horns that stuck out of the sides of his head, and she had her wings that were spattered and speckled with blood. Not likely to be able to fly with those.
"Still betting on the falcon?" she asked.
"Mm-hmmm. Come on. Let's get that sandwich," Gunnar said, pushing himself to his feet.
"But what about -"
"Yeah, I already know who's getting a promotion."
"Then why aren't you stopping it?"
"Because they don't need to know I know."
#
To give Gunnar credit, the food at the stalls was good. Luxurious, no, but with the burst of melted cheese, meat with the fat melting through it and dripping into the crispy bread and the faint taste of something pickled mixed into the whole thing, it was still tasty enough to enjoy. She ate one and a half, and passed the rest of it to the boar. He would finish it, she had no doubt. Probably without even getting any of the grease on his suit, somehow, which she still didn't understand how he managed.
"So, are there any particular threats that you want me to look for?" she asked, leaning against the wall of a quieter training arena.
"Just anyone that's looking bored or angry," the Baron said, shrugging. "I do what I can, but you know how it is. There's always some asshole that thinks they've got a better idea of how to run things. See, if they'd just come and talk to me -"
"You are a rather imposing individual, you know," she said.
"Yeah, me and my fat ass are all kinds of scary."
She arched an eyebrow. While the boar certainly had the heft that might make most people think that he was too chubby to take seriously, a second glance was all it took to notice that most of that gut didn't actually move, and that his pecs were about as hard as they could get. Thick arms and legs, hard tusks that stuck out just enough for those points to be a danger, and his height and build guaranteed that he'd be a threat to anyone that didn't know how to fight, and most people that did.
And that was before they even got to his 'key.' Hers was Bribery, knowing what it took to get someone to do something that they hadn't worked up the guts or the decision to do. His, on the other hand, was Assault, as in, Assault and Battery. Even a single touch was enough to hurt someone, and he seldom held back from going further.
Couldn't kill, though. And that was what scared the smart people.
It took three seconds of her staring at him for him to finally break down and chuckle. He lowered his half-eaten sandwich to his side and shook his head.
"Guess I can't pull that one on you, heh."
"No. No, you can't," she said, this time not bothering to fight the smile.
"Yeah, yeah. I know, I ain't that easy to talk to. But shit, I try. Try harder than Lavender does, the arrogant little -"
"He's already being sorted out by the rest of the Council," she said, shaking her head. "We're talking about you."
"Yeah, yeah. I know. Appreciate this, by the way," he said, gesturing at her with the remains of the sandwich. "Still paying you, still appreciate it. Not every Council member's willing to do a consult, even for a favor, or for cash."
"Yes, well, it's worth it."
Not often that she got compliments on her skill, either. Before she could take it further, a few soft beeps caught her ear. She reached into her pocket, tilting a small gem to the side and running the edge of her thumb against it.
"Gems now, eh?" he muttered between bites.
"Gems for this bank, at least; circuits running in the gemstone markers." She nodded. "Looks like your payment just came through. I'll take a more thorough look through your staff in a minute, but my first recommendations are these. Fire that possum janitor -"
"What, Yakes? He's good."
"He's also pissed off at the fighters; I'd guess that he took this job because he didn't have much else to turn to, but the way that he was looking at them, he's got some grudge on his shoulder. All it'd take for him to leave the door open and let someone sneak in is the promise to sabotage the rings or break the legs of a few fighters."
"Fuuuuuuuck. You know how hard it is to find someone that's actually good at cleaning on that scale?"
"You can choose whether you follow my advice or not, but that's what I recommend with him."
"Ugh. Okay, okay, I'll look into it and see what I can do. Anyone else?”
She nodded. Gunnar groaned.
"Okay, hit me with it. Who next?"
"Two maintenance staff."
The Baron winced.
"You can't seriously be that hard-up for people fixing things," the Lady in Yellow said, raising an eyebrow. "I would understand not getting rid of your top trainees, but maintenance -"
"Yeaaaaaaah, I didn't spend that much time vetting maintenance; it was, heh, boring."
"..."
"Yeah, yeah, say it."
"You're an idiot."
"Mea culpa."
"An idiot that speaks Latin, then," she muttered, rubbing her forehead. "I'll put them in the report. For now, I need to take a walk and see who else will be trouble."
"You do that. And Eeva?"
"What?"
"Appreciate you, girl."
“You already said that.”
“Yeah, well, I’m saying it again because I mean it that much, okay? Take the compliment, Lady. Not like you get a lot of ‘em, but ain’t gonna hurt you to take it now. Trust me; I know when people hurt from this shit.”
“I bet you do.”
“Heh. Don’t work too hard, and have more food if you need! I’ve told ‘em to make sure that you get it for free. Maybe you’ll give me a discount next time!”
Waving him off, the secretary bird returned to the main street of the facility. Much as she had been judgmental of the whole set-up, now that she had had a little time to think about it and calm down with the Baron, she understood how it was supposed to work.
Set up like a circus, one big tent in the middle, four main-streets of 'attractions' running out from it, and training rings for different shows running outward from there, she thought, holding the lay-out in her head. And he's set it up so that only the best 'performers' get under the big-top. The closer you get, the better the attractions. Only a few games toward the walls, but you graduate from those outer training circles - and you can see everyone fighting from there, so you can pick up tricks - the further in you get...
More than that, each ring seemed to have its own group, like a gang or a team that had formed out of those that had pride in being there. She'd seen the politicking in roughest form while walking around, and the way that some 'gangs' took control of different stretches of food and game attractions on the main paths meant that they'd favor their own 'ring' over the others.
But the politics only mattered in a secondary way. What really mattered was who was in charge, who stood to gain, and who stood to lose.
The Lady in Yellow eliminated half of the staff and trainees right off the bat. Those that were in the middle of the hierarchy had very little to gain for the most part. They weren't on the verge of pushing through to the next ring or at risk of falling down to the previous ones. They had comfort, they had their own level of prestige, and there was almost nothing that they'd get by letting someone else break the rules. They were more keen on protecting what they had rather than trying to get more, and that meant that they'd be harder to convince to do anything stupid. She could ignore most of them.
The outer-rings, the ones with the lowest-ranking fighters, weren't too much of a concern, either. There might be a few that would want a better offer, particularly if they'd been stuck for a while or assumed they were better than they were, but they'd be ambitious, pricy to get on your side. They'd want something that most outsiders wouldn't want to pay. Upward movement, not lateral. There'd be some concerns there, but not so many as there would be elsewhere. Staff were similar; there'd be outliers, but most of them would have some security here and wouldn't really have that many bones to pick. She'd have Gunnar get her the records for who had been on the roster for the longest, and the newest ones to be added, and that would cover the biggest risks.
But the real problems...
She looked toward the inner rings. Those that had risen to the top were always the ones most at risk for looking for another pay-out. Not because they were suffering, but because they had gotten addicted to being up there, and wanted another scrap, and another, and another. They loved that feeling of being up there, and when climbing higher got harder, they would get greedy, even desperate for someone to push them up that little bit further.
In her experience, the rich - whether in status, experience, or simple wealth - were always cheaper to buy than the poor. By and large, it took surprisingly little to get them to do something.
Just as she took a step toward the inner rings, the loudspeaker wailed. She looked up -
"Ladies and gentlemen, the Champion is emerging from the central tent and coming to ring 1A. Assemble for the show of the day!"
Eeva cocked her head to the side as she turned to the big tent just in time to see the orca walking out of the massive structure. Dressed in no more than a speedo, like some overconfident wrestler, he walked out with his arms over his head, holding them up to accept the cheers of some of the other top-rank fighters, and -
Ooooooh, my...
She looked at him with her power, and she saw nothing. No price, no desires, no nothing.
Well, well, well...you've already been bought...
Because that was what a 'nothing' meant. When she looked at someone that was already doing what they wanted to do, the price to 'bribe' them was never '0.' It was more like a sense of non-existence, like it was impossible to encourage them further into doing what they already wanted to do. When the price was cheap, it never rounded down to zero, because there was always that little thing that someone could do to push the other over the edge to doing the thing.
When '0' was visible, that meant that the price had been met. Someone, somewhere, had already bought the champion's loyalty, and it wasn't Gunnar.
Well, well, well...looks like my price just went up...
It hadn't, of course. That would have been against the deal that they had. But Gunnar was just enough of a sap that she was pretty sure that he'd throw on a tip once she brought this one up. Having your best fighter be the one that got bought by someone else? That'd hurt.
She almost pitied him. Almost.
Eeva shook her head, made a mental note of the whole thing, and kept walking. There were still quite a few people in the top rank to go through, and she doubted that she'd have time to see them all if she didn't get moving now. She still had to earn that paycheck, after all; she had standards to keep.
The End
Summary: A little show of what some of the Colorful Council are like, and what they do with each other.
Tags: No Sex, Fighting, Fighters, Secretary Bird, Boar, Pig, Various Species, Super Villains, Colorful Council, Lore, Character Work, Sci-Fi, Fantasy, Various Genre Bits, ",
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