{ "submission_id": "3520389", "keywords": [ { "keyword_id": "60", "keyword_name": "cat", "contributed": "f", "submissions_count": "216920" }, { "keyword_id": "62", "keyword_name": "feline", "contributed": "f", "submissions_count": "154131" }, { "keyword_id": "7456", "keyword_name": "gnoll", "contributed": "f", "submissions_count": "1015" }, { "keyword_id": "10943", "keyword_name": "kobold", "contributed": "f", "submissions_count": "12365" }, { "keyword_id": "165", "keyword_name": "male", "contributed": "f", "submissions_count": "1212833" }, { "keyword_id": "818449", "keyword_name": "snaklu", "contributed": "f", "submissions_count": "6" } ], "hidden": "f", "scraps": "f", "favorite": "f", "favorites_count": "1", "create_datetime": "2025-01-08 11:48:22.700404+00", "create_datetime_usertime": "08 Jan 2025 12:48 CET", "last_file_update_datetime": "2025-01-08 11:48:21.628196+00", "last_file_update_datetime_usertime": "08 Jan 2025 12:48 CET", "username": "TikTikKobold", "user_id": "502734", "user_icon_file_name": "146583_TikTikKobold_tiktik_cleaner.png", "user_icon_url_large": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/usericons/large/146/146583_TikTikKobold_tiktik_cleaner.png", "user_icon_url_medium": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/usericons/medium/146/146583_TikTikKobold_tiktik_cleaner.png", "user_icon_url_small": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/usericons/small/146/146583_TikTikKobold_tiktik_cleaner.png", "file_name": "5381423_TikTikKobold_snaklu_and_the_bandits_5.txt", "file_url_full": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/files/full/5381/5381423_TikTikKobold_snaklu_and_the_bandits_5.txt", "file_url_screen": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/files/screen/5381/5381423_TikTikKobold_snaklu_and_the_bandits_5.txt", "file_url_preview": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/files/preview/5381/5381423_TikTikKobold_snaklu_and_the_bandits_5.txt", "files": [ { "file_id": "5381423", "file_name": "5381423_TikTikKobold_snaklu_and_the_bandits_5.txt", "file_url_full": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/files/full/5381/5381423_TikTikKobold_snaklu_and_the_bandits_5.txt", "file_url_screen": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/files/screen/5381/5381423_TikTikKobold_snaklu_and_the_bandits_5.txt", "file_url_preview": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/files/preview/5381/5381423_TikTikKobold_snaklu_and_the_bandits_5.txt", "mimetype": "text/plain", "submission_id": "3520389", "user_id": "502734", "submission_file_order": "0", "full_size_x": null, "full_size_y": null, "screen_size_x": null, "screen_size_y": null, "preview_size_x": null, "preview_size_y": null, "initial_file_md5": "47bcb80cceccf5a2e17e28e0d9b6327f", "full_file_md5": "47bcb80cceccf5a2e17e28e0d9b6327f", "large_file_md5": "", "small_file_md5": "", "thumbnail_md5": "", "deleted": "f", "create_datetime": "2025-01-08 11:48:21.628196+00", "create_datetime_usertime": "08 Jan 2025 12:48 CET" } ], "pools": [], "description": "Snaklu, having pleased the Bandit Lord, seeks to escape.\n\nThis is a commissioned piece. Snaklu belongs to [url=https://bsky.app/profile/redfoxbuttlewds.bsky.social]FoxBoldLewd[/url]. If you'd like to get some work done from me, please consider checking out my [url=https://linktr.ee/tiktikkobold]Linktree[/url].\n\n[url=http://www.postybirb.com]Posted using PostyBirb[/url]", "description_bbcode_parsed": "Snaklu, having pleased the Bandit Lord, seeks to escape.

This is a commissioned piece. Snaklu belongs to FoxBoldLewd. If you'd like to get some work done from me, please consider checking out my Linktree.

Posted using PostyBirb", "writing": "How long did it take for the bandit lord’s breath to steady? How long was it before the hustle of the camp finally ended, leading to the return of the dark of the night sky? It couldn’t have been more than a few hours, but it felt like an eternity for Snaklu.\n\nBut it isn’t an eternity he spent idly. A plan bubbled in his mind while he lay next to his lover for the evening, fermenting into a supple drink that would lead him to his eventual escape.\n\nThere is a moment when a partner falls so deep in sleep that the subtle movements of the bard would register as nothing in their mind. Snaklu slips free from the paw, watching it flump with no problem upon the mountain of muscle.\n\nThe kobold sighs, staring at what could be. Shaking his head, he returns to the task at hand, slipping on his clothing. It’s a messy time underneath, but he sniffs and pokes his head out of the flap.\n\nThe tent is in the middle of the camp, and there are small fires bathing the place in a soft glow. With a deep breath, he rushes out, his body low and flat as he travels from tent to tent, waiting, listening, and heading through the dark parts where only a few of the bandits would be able to see.\n\nAnd thinking of it, two of them sat on the edge of the camp, sitting upon a log and chatting away at one another. No doubt, they were there to keep any intruders out, for they were both felines and had their ears high, twitching and swiveling at the slightest suggestion from beyond the treeline.\n\nThe bard nods, and he rolls his shoulders. Under his breath, he mutters, and he growls. He taps his throat and lets out another whispered grumble.\n\nBeyond, one of the feline guards perks up, turning their head in his direction.\n\n“Whazzat?” the second guard says, grabbing their sword.\n\n“Dunno.” The first says, standing up. “What’s going on?” he shouts, standing up. “If that’s you, Dale, I told you to lay off on the grog!”\n\nTilting his head back, the kobold barks, but it’s not in his own voice that his words fill the air but in the voice of the bandit lord. “You incompetent kittens. It’s me. My damned whore is being too much of a brat and I need your help, now!”\n\nHe punctuates his grave mockery of the captain with little murring mewls and giggles.\n\nThe guards both hop up, slowly approaching. As they do, the tent flap in front of them opens up, and a dwarf with an uncombed beard pops his head out. “What’s the racket!?” He grumbles.\n\nThe cats leap back, shouting simultaneously, muttering, and catching the dwarf up with harried and confused conversation.\n\nThe bard dips under the tent, scurrying past the three. As he does, he notes how similar this tent is to the bandit lord’s, but smaller. That means it is easily set up and collapsed. He just has to hook his tail around one particular knot, flick around with the dexterous thing, and let go!\n\n“Yeah, I heard ‘em!” the dwarf said. “But why would he want to call you two to help ‘em with that. I’m the whore tamer ‘round here and gaw!”\n\nThe tent falls upon the dwarf, causing the cats to leap back again. One of them gets onto his knees and frantically picks up at the canvas, all while the dwarf swings so many expletives, each of them adding to the bard’s repetoire most certainly.\n\nBut the second cat keeps up and sees the shadowy streak approaching the forest. “Sound the alarm,” he says, tightening the grip on his sword. “We got a critter, and it can mimic the captain!”\n\nWith that, the feline bandit dashes off into the dense foliage beyond the camp.\n\n“Alright, you monster, you’d better run if you know what’s good for ya. ‘Cause I’ll catch ya and skin ya alive!”\n\nSnaklu hides in one bush, watching as the feline gets closer and closer. He holds his breath, but he has something else in his hand.\n\n“I know ya got a brain on ya!” the cat says. “Just come out, you fairy thing or gobbledygook or whatever the hell you are, and we can end this quietl-eeeee!”\n\nThe kobold tugs the line, fishing line to be precise, sending the cat stumbling forward, hitting his jaw upon the ground, stunning him.\n\nWhen the kobold emerges from the brush, he sashays away, looking over his shoulder and winking at the guard. “It’s been a lovely day here. Tell your boss he owes me. I’ll be sure to come collect.”\n\nThe feline groans, reaching his hand out toward the kobold.\n\nSnaklu swoops down, grabs the paw, leans in, presses his nose to the back, and licks. “Enchanted, but you, my friend, aren’t going to cut me out, are you?” He flutters his eyes. They almost seem to shimmer in the night darkness.\n\nThe guard blinks, his jaw slack, his ears flattening as his whiskers droop. “N-no, of course. You go right ahead.\n\n“I’m oh-so-glad. I’ll be sure to put in a good word with the adventurer’s guild and the town guard with you. Toodles!”\n\nThe guard smiles, so comforted by the promise of this friend.\n\nBut the shouts of the camp and the rousing of his allies snap him out of it. He grabs at the kobold, but he is no longer there.\n\nBut of course, he remembers that the kobold had asked him nicely to let him go, and he did.\n\nShivering, the guard pushes himself up, only to back up against the large, half-clothed form of the bandit leader.\n\nThe hyena clasps the cat’s shoulders, leaning in over them. “Well, now, I lost my pet. What are we gonna do to make up for it, hm?”\n\nThe cat looks up to his boss, a soft purr rising from his chest. “Well, I can think of a few things, boss.”\n\nAnd Snaklu, having bolted for his freedom, was just out of earshot enough that he would not hear this saucy nugget of intrigue. Alas, a bard can’t know all the hot tea spilled in the world.", "writing_bbcode_parsed": "How long did it take for the bandit lord’s breath to steady? How long was it before the hustle of the camp finally ended, leading to the return of the dark of the night sky? It couldn’t have been more than a few hours, but it felt like an eternity for Snaklu.

But it isn’t an eternity he spent idly. A plan bubbled in his mind while he lay next to his lover for the evening, fermenting into a supple drink that would lead him to his eventual escape.

There is a moment when a partner falls so deep in sleep that the subtle movements of the bard would register as nothing in their mind. Snaklu slips free from the paw, watching it flump with no problem upon the mountain of muscle.

The kobold sighs, staring at what could be. Shaking his head, he returns to the task at hand, slipping on his clothing. It’s a messy time underneath, but he sniffs and pokes his head out of the flap.

The tent is in the middle of the camp, and there are small fires bathing the place in a soft glow. With a deep breath, he rushes out, his body low and flat as he travels from tent to tent, waiting, listening, and heading through the dark parts where only a few of the bandits would be able to see.

And thinking of it, two of them sat on the edge of the camp, sitting upon a log and chatting away at one another. No doubt, they were there to keep any intruders out, for they were both felines and had their ears high, twitching and swiveling at the slightest suggestion from beyond the treeline.

The bard nods, and he rolls his shoulders. Under his breath, he mutters, and he growls. He taps his throat and lets out another whispered grumble.

Beyond, one of the feline guards perks up, turning their head in his direction.

“Whazzat?” the second guard says, grabbing their sword.

“Dunno.” The first says, standing up. “What’s going on?” he shouts, standing up. “If that’s you, Dale, I told you to lay off on the grog!”

Tilting his head back, the kobold barks, but it’s not in his own voice that his words fill the air but in the voice of the bandit lord. “You incompetent kittens. It’s me. My damned whore is being too much of a brat and I need your help, now!”

He punctuates his grave mockery of the captain with little murring mewls and giggles.

The guards both hop up, slowly approaching. As they do, the tent flap in front of them opens up, and a dwarf with an uncombed beard pops his head out. “What’s the racket!?” He grumbles.

The cats leap back, shouting simultaneously, muttering, and catching the dwarf up with harried and confused conversation.

The bard dips under the tent, scurrying past the three. As he does, he notes how similar this tent is to the bandit lord’s, but smaller. That means it is easily set up and collapsed. He just has to hook his tail around one particular knot, flick around with the dexterous thing, and let go!

“Yeah, I heard ‘em!” the dwarf said. “But why would he want to call you two to help ‘em with that. I’m the whore tamer ‘round here and gaw!”

The tent falls upon the dwarf, causing the cats to leap back again. One of them gets onto his knees and frantically picks up at the canvas, all while the dwarf swings so many expletives, each of them adding to the bard’s repetoire most certainly.

But the second cat keeps up and sees the shadowy streak approaching the forest. “Sound the alarm,” he says, tightening the grip on his sword. “We got a critter, and it can mimic the captain!”

With that, the feline bandit dashes off into the dense foliage beyond the camp.

“Alright, you monster, you’d better run if you know what’s good for ya. ‘Cause I’ll catch ya and skin ya alive!”

Snaklu hides in one bush, watching as the feline gets closer and closer. He holds his breath, but he has something else in his hand.

“I know ya got a brain on ya!” the cat says. “Just come out, you fairy thing or gobbledygook or whatever the hell you are, and we can end this quietl-eeeee!”

The kobold tugs the line, fishing line to be precise, sending the cat stumbling forward, hitting his jaw upon the ground, stunning him.

When the kobold emerges from the brush, he sashays away, looking over his shoulder and winking at the guard. “It’s been a lovely day here. Tell your boss he owes me. I’ll be sure to come collect.”

The feline groans, reaching his hand out toward the kobold.

Snaklu swoops down, grabs the paw, leans in, presses his nose to the back, and licks. “Enchanted, but you, my friend, aren’t going to cut me out, are you?” He flutters his eyes. They almost seem to shimmer in the night darkness.

The guard blinks, his jaw slack, his ears flattening as his whiskers droop. “N-no, of course. You go right ahead.

“I’m oh-so-glad. I’ll be sure to put in a good word with the adventurer’s guild and the town guard with you. Toodles!”

The guard smiles, so comforted by the promise of this friend.

But the shouts of the camp and the rousing of his allies snap him out of it. He grabs at the kobold, but he is no longer there.

But of course, he remembers that the kobold had asked him nicely to let him go, and he did.

Shivering, the guard pushes himself up, only to back up against the large, half-clothed form of the bandit leader.

The hyena clasps the cat’s shoulders, leaning in over them. “Well, now, I lost my pet. What are we gonna do to make up for it, hm?”

The cat looks up to his boss, a soft purr rising from his chest. “Well, I can think of a few things, boss.”

And Snaklu, having bolted for his freedom, was just out of earshot enough that he would not hear this saucy nugget of intrigue. Alas, a bard can’t know all the hot tea spilled in the world.", "pools_count": 0, "title": "Snaklu and the Bandits 5", "deleted": "f", "public": "t", "mimetype": "text/plain", "pagecount": "1", "rating_id": "1", "rating_name": "Mature", "ratings": [ { "content_tag_id": "2", "name": "Nudity", "description": "Nonsexual nudity exposing breasts or genitals (must not show arousal)", "rating_id": "1" } ], "submission_type_id": "12", "type_name": "Writing - Document", "guest_block": "f", "friends_only": "f", "comments_count": "0", "views": "11" }