Leo's never had anyone kneel to him before, never seen what it looks like from this side of things. It's...interesting, to say the least.
Of course, technically Saki isn't kneeling, at least not yet. He sags on the floor, eyes closed, hair spilling over his face after Leo undid his topknot. He seems almost smaller now that his armor's been stripped off, leaving him bare and pale as a worm.
In the old days, he liked to wear a robe, like to have Leo pull it off his shoulders or untie the knot with his teeth. In the old days Leo looked at him in a manner that could only be called worship, focusing on Saki's greatest attributes--his muscles, his eyes, his massive cock--instead of the general strangeness of a naked human. In the old days....
But the old days are over and done. Saki's eyes are closed, his muscles pitiful compared to the weight of the chain Leo's shackled him with, his cock lies limp between his legs. And the mask Leo wears is blue, not black. He touches it to remind himself.
"Wake up," he calls in Japanese. Saki doesn't move and Leo kicks him with a growl. "Wake up, you old fool." He feels a shiver of daring at this act of rebellion, like a child saying a dirty word for the first time.
Saki stirs, but doesn't wake. Leo lets out a huff and presses his foot down on Saki's cock, grinding it into the dirt. He sucks in a breath, cheek scraping across the floor.
"Mmmwhat?" The expression on his face is so vulnerable it's frightening, a shift in the universe. Saki blinks up at him, blearily. "Kitsune?"
"No," Leo says sweetly. "Your other whore." The word tastes bitter in his mouth, but he forces himself to spit it out, to claim it.
Saki's eyes focus and he straightens up, flexing his hands in the shock cuffs Fugitoid put in him, leftovers from Kraang's rule. He's not going to be able to break them, or the ones around his ankles. Even if he could, there's the little matter of the iron collar Leo has clamped around his neck, attached to a chain bolted to the floor.
If this bothers the Shredder, he doesn't show it. He just raises his chin, looking as regal as one can when naked and restrained. "Ah," he says. "The little failed chunin."
A part of Leo wants to shrink at the disappointment and disgust in his eyes, wants to plead in beg for mercy. When he belonged to Saki, he would have submitted to any cruelty, any depravity, to take that look away.
He shoves that part to the farther corners of his mind. "Fine words from a failed conqueror." He drags a toe down on ugly scratch in Saki's side, a mark of Kraang's affections. Saki winces and Leo smirks, the expression feeling odd on his face.
Saki looks around, surveying the filthy chamber Leo's stashed them in. "Where am I?"
"A friend of ours found you face down in your own shit on the island." Fugitoid had gone back to look for supplies (for Donnie, broken Donnie) and found Saki there, curled up in the battered remains of Kraang's base.
No human could have survived for so long in such an environment, he'd said when Leo had picked up the phone. But Saki isn't very human any more, is he?
"That wasn't the answer to my question," Saki says, a chiding edge to his voice. You should know better, Leonardo. Run it through again.
"It's the only one you're getting," Leo replies simply.
Saki cocks his head. "So, my darling pet has decided to sit up and show some fangs, eh? What, do you think if you put up a good enough show I'll let you come crawling back?"
Leo's almost surprised by how quickly his own foot blurs, catching Saki in the chest and sending him falling backwards with a grunt. His eyes are wide, shocked, and Leo gives him another savage kick between the legs. Saki folds in on himself, groaning.
"Shut up." Leo's voice sounds too high, too angry. Calm. You must be calm.
"Kick...kicking a man when he's down, eh?" Saki rasps. "What would your father say?" He cocks his head. "Tell me, does the old fool even know I'm here?"
Leo hesitates for a heartbeat too long and Saki grins. "He doesn't know, does he? None of them do." He glances at the door, as if he can somehow see down the dark tunnels leading back to their home under the church. "Gathered at poor little Donatello's bedside, I assume? Or he is already in the grave?"
Donnie. His sweet, brave brother, who would never let Leo get away with this if he was awake, never let him talk Fugitoid into dumping Saki in this carefully chosen location while Splinter meditated and Raph smashed things and Mikey cried in Woody's arms. But Donnie's not here, and Saki is, and Leo's vision has been tinged with red since he found his brother lying on that bloodstained floor.
Leo plants one foot on Saki's chest and bends to gather a length of chain, yanking as hard as he can. Saki gasps, breath suddenly ripped from him as he heaves and gurgles on the floor.
"You. Don't. Speak. His. Name." Leo takes his time gritting out each word, watching Saki gasp for breath. Then drops to his knees, slamming Saki's face back against the ground with a satisfying thunk. "Understand?"
He watches Saki carefully sit back upright, carefully wiping his bloody mouth off on his shoulder. "Noted." He gives Leo an approving look (Leo doesn't care he doesn't he doesn't). "I see my little soldier has grown up."
Grown up. Leo thinks of the Rat King's soft hiss, the hand on his shoulder. A boy who has become a man, he'd said, with that fucking smile that meant he knew exactly how Kitsune and Shredder had used him. Become a man, as if that made anything okay, as if that brought back his murdered childhood. Leo's fists clench.
Saki's still talking. "Such a pity what happened to your brother."
"A pity?" Leo barks a harsh laugh. "You set those monsters on him! You put him in a coma!"
"Only because he chose to betray me," Saki says mildly. "Did they take his innocence while he was at it?"
"No." Leo had checked. He'd known full well that creatures as big as Bebop and Rocksteady would have left visible damage if they'd tried to crack Donnie open that way, but Leo had still checked his mouth for fluids, still lifted the bedsheets and checked between his legs with shaking fingers. "They weren't quite as monstrous as you in that regard, at least."
"Is that what you think?" Saki asks, almost to himself. And then, before Leo can ask what he means, "Tell me, did you truly not know you were leaving my brothers to my tender mercies? OR were you just making a sacrifice?"
Leo looks down. "I...I didn't know the full extent of the deal." That oversight tears at him, and he suspects it always will.
Saki nods. "You weren't with him, then? I thought you might be nearby while he was speaking through that infernal machine." He tilts his head. "Did you not want to hear my voice? To see me, even from a distance?"
He hadn't. The idea had scared him, and it scares him almost as badly now, but his anger is worse. "I made a mistake," Leo says. "One I won't make again. You're going to stay right where I can see until I can figure out how to end your miserable life. And Kitsune and those beasts are going into the pit after you."
"Of course," Saki nods. "Thoroughness is important. I taught you well."
"You didn't teach me anything except how to hate." As soon as he says it, he knows it's true. Leo wants to hurt the man in front of him as badly as he wants to please him, and he doesn't know which scares him more.
"Is that so?" Saki looks him up and down, eyes dragging over his skin in a way that makes Leo squirm. He suddenly wishes he'd worn some kind of covering--hell, even his Foot gear would have provided a bit more protection than this.
"I seem to remember a young boy who was determined to learn everything he could from me," Saki purrs. "How to lead clans, how to win wars, how to bring whole cities to their knees. A boy who wanted to learn all the secret tricks of swordplay and poison...and all about the pleasures of the flesh."
"You made me!" Leo bursts out. "Kitsune brainwashed me, made me love you! I never agreed to any of it, I never would have--"
"She altered your memories," Saki cuts him off. "Not your heart." He raises an eyebrow. "Come now, Leonardo, your brothers are not here. There is no one to tell your tale of stolen virtue. Did you really think that what I had with you was some kind of crime?"
Leo can't breathe. Saki's wrong, of course he's wrong, he has to be wrong, but somewhere in the back of his mind he can see the accusation in Raph's eyes, can feel the cold terror of his own brother doubting him.
"I was a child," he points out. "I am a child." God, he is, isn't he? The thought makes the buzz of nausea in his stomach even worse.
"And you were very mature for your age." Saki's voice is patient. "You knew what you were doing."
"Knew what I was--"
"I never beat you or starved you, never tried to make you open your mouth, spread your legs, lift that pretty tail," Saki cuts him. "I never even had to tie you down--sometimes you were the one scratching at Kitsune and mine's door like a little mouse, begging to be let in. Is it my fault the rat never gave you the affection you needed before you came to my side?"
"He never raped me," Leo growls.
"Neither did I, no matter what you say to get yourself to sleep at night. However you try to convince yourself that you didn't like what I gave you, didn't like the pleasure and the power and the attention you didn't have to share with three whiny brats anymore."
"You murdered me." Leo's voice is hoarse, trembling. "You murdered me and when I came back you turned me into your slave, you violated me and your wife joined in, you sent me to kill my family and you thought we were...what? In love?"
Saki nods, looking almost regretful. "It was sad that you had to die, little one. You were such a pretty child, so like your mother." Leo stiffens at that, but Saki doesn't seem to notice--maybe he just doesn't care.  "It was...alarming, to find you and your family had returned, but somehow, you have kept your beauty."
Beauty. Pretty thing. My lovely little whore. At Saki's feet, on Saki's lap, in Saki's bed, with the blood of Saki's enemies on his hands and Saki's mess in his mouth, he had drunk down that praise like holy water. No one had ever called something like him pretty before.
There are times these days when Leo thinks of scratching his face with a kunai, of erasing whatever Saki thinks he's kept.
"I took the opportunity for a second chance," Saki says. "And you embraced it. Embraced me, in every sense of the word. You belonged to Kitsune and I, and you cannot deny we were happy. It was only when your family stole you away that things went wrong. You're not stupid--you must understand this."
Does he sound almost impatient? Oh god, he does. Like Leo's being slow to grasp a new drill or wring answers out of a target. Like if he just keeps at this enough, he'll be able to talk Leo into letting him out of here, take a spanking for his rebellion and crawl back to the clan.
Who knows? Maybe he's right. But Leo doesn't want to let him.
"We're never going to get anywhere with this, are we?" Leo says suddenly, cutting Saki off as he opens his mouth again.
He blinks, looking caught off guard. "I--"
"I didn't know why I brought you here," Leo admits, looking back at the door. "I knew I couldn't leave you on the island, and I couldn't bring you near the others, but I could tell there was another reason to keep you all to myself. I wanted to confront you, maybe, say all the things I couldn't say in front of the others."
"Is that so?" Saki asks, looking like he doesn't really care about any of it.
"But it doesn't matter what I say, does it?" Leo asks. "It doesn't change anything. You don't care, you're not sorry, and I don't think I would feel better if you did."
He backs up, feeling something strange and cold settle over his mind. "But maybe I can show you."
Leo reaches up and unclasps his belt, kicking it into a far corner.
Saki raises his chin, still looking imperious. "What do you think you are doing, chunin?"
"Don't want to make a mess," Leo says mechanically, reaching to undo his arm wraps. "You may be made of money, but we don't have detergent to spare."
He props his leg against the wall, sliding off his ankle wraps. "Not to mention that, well, you're right. Nobody knows you're here, and I want to keep it that way."
"Torture, then?" Saki raises his eyebrow. "Are you going to show me how many of my lessons you remember?"
Leo shakes his head. "Not torture, now. You’re too good at handling that kind of pain." He slips off the offer wrap, makes a point of throwing it down like a gauntlet. He can see the wheels begin to turn in Saki's mind, the truth start to sink in.
But if he's frightened, Saki doesn't show it. "Is that it, my needy little brat? You need an excuse for me to fuck me again?" He rattles his chains with a coy grin. "I've never done it in a...situation like this, but I'm sure I can perform."
Leo smiles back, teeth razor-edged and hungry. "I'm sure you could." He considers taking off his mask, but leaves it on instead. "But that's not what you're here for."
Saki bites his lips as Leo walks closer. Does he look nervous? Or maybe Leo's mixing it up with memories of his first time, how shy and anxious he'd felt, how scared of messing things up. Frightened, but absolutely trusting that his Master knew what was best.
There is no trust in Saki's eyes. It makes it easier, somehow.
Leo sinks to his knees in front of him and places his hands on Saki's shoulders, rubbing them gently. "You're going to feel what I did when I woke up from Kitsune's spell," he says quietly. "And then you're going to tell me how you feel."
And he's kissing Saki. Leo thinks it might be the first time he's kissed Saki, instead of the other way around; maybe he did initiate things, like Saki says, maybe he did desperately seek out approval, but he started a kiss. It felt too intimate somehow, ridiculous as that is.
It tastes the same as the other times, to be honest. The faint smell of sweat and incense, the slightest hint of stubble. Saki freezes for a second before he starts to kiss back, seeing this as an opportunity, maybe, and that's when Leo bites him hard.
He pulls back, taste of blood in his mouth, as Saki lets out a yowl of rage and tries to headbutt him. "Naughty, naughty," Leo chides, gathering his fingers in Saki's hair and pulling it back with a hard yank.
"You hate when I do that, don't you?" He knows that Saki does. "You never liked it when people messed with your hair. Not me, not even Kitsune." He runs his fingers through the strands, petting them. Saki growls at the touch.
"And you didn't like this, either." Leo bends down to lap at Saki's nipples, making him tense. Leo smirks, emboldened, and reaches down to gentle pick and tug at the little bits of flesh. It dawns on him that he's starting to get hard inside his shell, for the first time in months.
"What does it feel like?" he asks, genuinely curious.
Saki's face is bright red--Leo didn't even know he could go that color, thought himself the only one in the Foot clan capable of a blush. "It feels," and this is the deep, booming growl of the Shredder, "like a loose, used-up old slut desperately trying to get my attention."
Leo hits him hard, more like an open-palmed strike than a slap. Saki lurches to the side with a grunt and Leo reaches out to grab a lock of his hair, pressing one hand against Saki's mouth and tugs with the other. It takes a few hard pulls before the lock comes free, sending him tumbling. If it makes a sound, Leo can't hear it over Saki's roar.
He stares at the bloody black strand, suddenly remembering the old tales about boys and girls promising true love by exchanging locks of hair. "Sorry," he mutters, gesturing to his own head. "I don't have anything to give you."
"Little beast," Saki growls.
"Takes one to know one," Leo shoots back, getting up and walking back over to the belt. He tucks the hair into his belt--to burn or to keep, he doesn't yet know--and tugs out a kunai instead.
"I thought you were above torture?" Saki asks sarcastically as Leo returns to him. Blood stains his temple from where Leo rips out the hair, but his blush is gone, his gaze rigid and defiant.
"Do you remember after I took down Victor?" Leo asks. "When you told me the world would be ours? And then you pulled into a room that still had a dead woman in it and used her blood because you couldn't be bothered to look for lube?"
Does Saki suck in a breath, ever so slightly? His face is unchanged. "Do you have any idea what I will do to you if you attempt this?"
"Rape me, kill me, rape and kill the people I love," Leo says, kneeling besides him. "That's usually how it goes."
"I killed you before," Saki points out. "And you will wish I was so quick a second time."
"A second time?" Leo rests one hand on Saki's shoulder and uses the other to lightly press the blade against the skin above his nipple. To his surprise, his hands don't shake. "Oh, Master. You've been killing me since you had Kitsune turn me into a slave. It's never stuck."
He drags the knife across the one nipple, sharp and fast, then switches to the next before Saki has time to cry out. It's a soft, muffled sound, more of outrage than pain, but Leo savors it anyway.
"Look at that," Leo murmurs, and a part of him really is surprised. "You do bleed." He presses his fingers into the blood, watching them drip with a sense of wonder. 
It reminds him of the early days of his mutation, when he and his brothers were amnesiac mimics and everything was something new. Somedays, he wishes they'd stayed that way.
"You think this is justice?" Saki growls. "I never hurt you like this."
"No." Leo shakes his head. "You made me train until my feet split open, you beat the shit out of me when you were mad, you fucked me every way imaginable, but you never chained me down to cut my nonexistent nipples." He makes another deeper cut under Saki's arm, and then under the other one for symmetry. "You were a paragon of restraint."
"I'm not the one responsible for your depravit--aargh!"
Saki makes that sound because Leo's just shoved him onto his back, chains jangling and cuffs clattering against the stone. Leo straddles him, gathering a length of chain in one hand, struck by a rather ridiculous image of a cowboy straddling a horse in an old Western.
It's disorienting, being on top. Just enough like riding Saki to make Leo grit his teeth, but still different in all the important ways.
Like the prick between Saki's legs, limper than Leo's ever seen it. He'll have to change that.
Leo runs bright red fingers along Saki’s length, the movements practiced and precise. "Do you still like it like this?"
Saki seems to be considering the virtue of holding back, but then he lets out a soft moan, the sound so familiar Leo's heart skips a beat. "Of course. it's like nothing ever changed," he whispers, looking at Leo with those dark, endless eyes. "My pretty little bitch, desperate to please me."
Anger, now, but it's dull, a comfortable weight around Leo's shoulders rather than a fire in his head. He reaches up, pulling back a strand of Saki's hair to get a better look at his marked eye. "And what about this?" he asks, dragging the kunai crossways over the scar.
Saki growls, biting his lip. Blood drips down his face--if Leo lets him live long enough, the two scars will form an upside-down cross. The cross of Saint Peter; Leo reminds Donnie reading aloud from a moldy bible in the early days. A story of penance, sacrifice, adoration. And redemption, but that is not what is happening here.
"I think you might be," he muses, reaching down to continue toying with Saki's cock. It's slowly, but surely stiffening at his touch. Leo can feel a corresponding ache in his shell.
"Don't sell yourself short." Is there the slightest waver in the voice of iron? "You were the best courtesan I ever trained." Saki gathers up a wad of spit and sends it flying into Leo's face. He wipes it up and stares at it for a second before rubbing it into Saki's bleeding nipple, making him hiss.
"You know I haven't touched myself since I escaped?" he says conversationally. "It kept giving me panic attacks."
He wets his hand with more blood and slides it down his chest. "I'd remember your hands on me, and I'd get nauseous."
"Are you still whining about that?" Saki asks. He's clearly trying to sound bored, and Leo might believe him if he didn't know him far too well.
He ignores the jibe. "But it's not as frightening when I can smell your blood, feel it on me." He rubs between his legs and feels himself drop down, already getting hard. "I don't feel myself slipping away when I can look down and see the fear in your eyes."
"I'm not--"
"Yes you are," and there's that same exhilaration of a broken rule, of flatly denying his master. "I worshipped you for so long, Saki. I could hardly keep my eyes off you. I lived you, breathed you, I devoted every waking moment to making you happy. You really think I didn't learn how to read you?"
He takes his time digging his fingers into each little cut, smiling whenever he wrings free a little gasp of pain. "Tell me, have you ever let a man inside you before?"
"Your worthless father, he," Saki sucks in a harsh breath, "preferred to spread his legs. Just like his wife and son."
The rage is there and gone in a flash, leaving a ragged emptiness in its wake. It takes a few seconds for Leo's conscious mind to catch up and see the blood dripping down Saki's head. His left ear hangs limp and tattered, half of it missing. He stares blankly, eyes wide with shock. Leo knows the feeling.
"If it's your first time, we'll need as much as we can get," Leo says sweetly, reaching up to soak his fingers into a fresh coat of red. He pushes on the tender wound until Saki's eyes flutter back to life.
"I will strangle you with your father's entrails for that," he rasps.
Leo hums thoughtfully and shifts back, making sure to brush his cock across Saki's chest as he goes. Those muscular legs are pressed together, or course, and they've left enough bruises on Leo's ribs for him to know that opening them up will be no easy thing.
"Do you want me to turn you over?" he asks. "Facedown with your ass in the air like a dog? You liked seeing me that way."
Saki seems to think about it, then lifts his chin. "Do your worst."
Leo huffs. "Fine." He stands up and gathers the chain, while his free hand grabs for a tangle of hair and remaining ear. Then he yanks with all his before Saki has time to unbalance himself, sending him crashing onto his side with a grunt.
Saki squirms and growls as Leo turns him onto his front, bucking hard enough to almost throw him off before Leo grabs his neck and pinches just hard enough for him to skitter to a halt.
He gets Saki in the right position and looks at him for a moment, considering. "You know, I don't think I've ever really gotten a good look at your ass before," he muses. "Hairier than I expected." And it is, especially the trembling, flagging cock that Leo gives a few quick pumps.
Saki twists around to look at him, and Leo is almost--almost--impressed by the defiance in his eyes. "You think you can make me beg?" he growls. "Think that I'll apologize for giving your slutty little hole what it wanted?"
"You knew what you were doing," Leo whispers. Saki knew. He had to. And if he didn't...well, Leo's not sure he can bring himself to care.
"When I get out of here, I'll take one of your brothers with me. Raphael, Michelangelo, maybe Donatello if there's enough left of him for Kitsune to heal. Strip them of everything this time, even their fighting skills, turn them into a bed slave who can't do anything except beg for cock--"
He gasps the finger Leo shoves inside him, head smacking against the ground. 
"Sorry," Leo says blandly, curling his finger in a way that causes Saki to blanche. "I should have warned you to relax."
Not that Saki would have listened. He's desperately trying to clench, but Leo's hand is so slick, grinding remorselessly past the trembling muscles. 
"Hush," the croods, soft and teasing. "I know it's your first time. I'll take care of you, little one." The exact same words that Saki whispered to him the night he took Leo's virginity. They may not have haunted Saki as badly as they have Leo, but it's still clear from the look in his eyes that he remembers.
"You really were gentle," Leo admits. "I'm not going to do that, though. I won't lie to you that way."
Saki turns away, as if Leo can't hear the way his breath picks up, or feel the tremors rippling through his body. "Frightening, isn't it?" he asks, quickly setting to work. He'd prepared himself a few times during his time in the Foot, made sure to keep himself loose and slick for his master, so he's an old pro at it by now.
"I was so scared that night," Leo murmurs. "I tried to hide it, to be brave, but I'm sure you knew." He adds another finger and spreads them far too wide, savoring Saki's little jerk. "I think you liked that fear. It's all right, though. I like yours too."
He bends over, resting his chin on Saki's shoulder. He can hear those frantic breaths slowing, the sound of Saki trying to plunge himself into a meditative state. Trying to leave.
"No," and Leo's fingers are trembling as he pushes a third one inside Saki's ass. "No, you don't get to run." He sinks his teeth into Saki's neck and shakes him like a dog, relishing the tender snap of skin breaking and the rustle of hair flying across his face.
When he pulls away, there's blood dripping down his chin. "Skip out on me again and I'll cut off your balls," he barks. "Understand?" From the way Saki stiffens, Leo thinks he does.
All of a sudden he's eager, fingers moving too hard and too fast. "Burns, doesn't it?" he says, as a soft hiss rises from between Saki's teeth.
"S-sadist," Saki's fingers twist frantically in the cuffs, no doubt aching to wrap around Leo's throat. "All you needed was an excuse, wasn't it? Someone to act out your filthy desires on, to be your victim or your monster or whatever you needed."
He looks back up at Leo again, face flushed and eyes bright. "Who will satisfy your needs when I'm gone? Who will care for your vicious little appetites?"
Leo abruptly rips out his hand. "You," he slaps Saki across the ass, leaving a mark that's red in more ways than one, "made," slap, "me," slap, "this," slap, "way."
He pulls Saki's cheeks apart and delivers one final blow to his soaked, stretched hole. It's this, at last, makes him scream, the loudest noise Leo has ever heard the Shredder make.
"I don't even know what I like," Leo spits. "Do you understand? The only reason I can touch you at all is that I know it hurts you as much as it hurts me!"
The words are spilling from him now, the calm blanket ripped off to reveal a storm between. Not because of what Saki said, but because he screamed, because he somehow thinks he has a right to pain now.
"I can't stop thinking about what you did and I don't know if it's what I want or what I made you want, I don't know anything! You didn't give me a chance to figure any of it out!"
Saki opens his mouth and Leo rips off his mask, shoving it into his mouth. Cleanliness be damned, he doesn't want to hear any more from that poison tongue. It lives in his head rent-free already.
"Reap the fruits of your labor," he growls, and then he's planting his hands on Saki's hips as he shoves inside.
"Fuck!" It's tight, so damn tight and wet and warm Leo's worried he'll come too fast. Saki howls into the gag, frantically twisting and writhing, but somehow that just makes it better. He pushes inside with a grunt, yanking on Saki's thighs to move it along.
"I'm a monster," he whispers, bending down to spit in Saki's undamaged ear. "Maybe a sadist. But I'm not going to be cruel like you, I'm not going to play with gentleness, not ever." He reaches down and wraps his fingers around Saki's cock, stirring it back to life.
"I'm going to hurt you, and it isn't going to stop until you show me how much you like it."
Saki gargles something defiant-sounding, shoulders shaking with effort. Leo chuckles. "You think I can't do it? I'm a well-trained whore, remember?" He tangles his fingers in Saki's hair and grinds his face to the concrete, rubbing it back and forth so that blood mixes with dirt. "When I said you taught me how to hate, this is what I meant."
He sets up a punishing pace, both with his hand and his cock. Churrs spill from his lips, and they somehow sound angrier and more vicious than Leo has ever heard.
He hasn't felt pleasure like this in so long, not since Saki's bed, not since Saki was the one pinning him down and riding him like a prized horse. The kind of pleasure that was always flavored with fear and need and a desperation that could never be quenched.
The memories make him move faster, make him scratch his nails down the pale, vulnerable curve of Saki's back until he sees a spot of blood.
"You like that?" rasps a voice that is and is not Leo's own, own that sounds too deep and too harsh. "Are you having fun playing the bitch?"
Saki's cock is hard and heavy in his hands. He lets out a frustrated growl, fingers clenching, trying his level best to hold back. But Leo has had enough nightmares about what this man's pleasure looks like to recognize it for what it is.
"I think you are," he purrs, watching spittle fly into the Shredder's hair. "I think that you could have saved everyone the trouble by bending over for a good taming long ago. From me, from my father, from anyone who would have you."
He smacks Shredder's ass again, and again, giggling when he hits hard enough to make the man flinch. The world feels bent out of joint around him, gravity slipping out of control. Leo doesn't know where he's going to land, or if he'll land at all. He can't bring himself to care.
"You could kill me a thousand times and it wouldn't take away what I've done," he whispers. "Because that's h-how this goes. It stays with you. It moves into your head and it looks over your shoulder while you sleep or eat or talk to someone or even think about a relationship, it digs into your skull and it, doesn't, leave!"
He's crying. When did he start crying? Those are tears burning down his face, hot and bright, and he's confused by them while at the same time they make perfect sense.
Leo yanks on the chain and Saki lets out a desperate groan, feet jittering on the cobblestones. "Do you think you can get Kitsune to take this away? She'll try, but she won't be able to manage it. I'll live on in your bones.
“That’s what you did to me, you know. ‘Cause I’ll give tell you a secret Saki--we were never happy. Do you know how many times I threw up after sucking your cock, and I didn’t even know why?
“You will, though. That’s the only mercy I can give you.”
He tightens his grip around Saki's length, which is shuddering in a way that's all too familiar. "Now, come on. Show me what you are."
One last squeeze, and Saki's spasming with a desperate yowl, slamming his head against the floor in frustration. The splash of warm semen over his hand makes Leo vomit, just as Saki's tightening around him makes him come.
He bathes Saki--bathes them both, really--in two different kinds of filth. Saki doesn't even seem to notice Leo retching on top of him; he's too busy letting out desperate, muffled shrieks.
"Shh," Leo whispers faintly, dragging his hands down Saki's side. "It's okay. It's okay." He's still crying, or maybe it's laughing? It's hard to identify the sounds crawling out of his own throat. "It's okay it's okay it's okay."
A lie, but a pitifully see-through one. Maybe it doesn't count?
Leo plants hands that are still streaked with blood against the floor and pushes himself up, staggering out of Saki with a hideous squelch. He totters across the room, driven by a sudden urge to get away.
He sinks to the ground, wrapping his arms around himself, the same way he used to do in the shower after a night in Saki's bed. Seeking comfort without knowing why, because hadn't he already been comforted?
Maybe Saki's right, he thinks, looking at the filth crusting on his thighs. Maybe nothing ever changes.
He hears a soft gagging sound and looks up to see Saki spit out the mask. He sits up with a grunt, and looks over his Leo. There's an emptiness in his eyes, a mark of something stolen. It's the look Leo always sees in the mirror after a particularly bad night.
"Are you happy now?" he asks, his voice sounding ruined and burnt-out.
Happy.
Happy.
This time Leo's sure that the sound he's making is laughter. It tears up out of him with the wild heat of a lightning bolt, an insane cackle that makes him want to flinch. He's laughing and laughing until he thinks he might pass out or throw up again, laughing as he feels himself crash to earth.
Happy. What a fucking joke. All he could ever do was spread misery.
He's still laughing as he falls back, exhausted, gasping, drowning in his own skin. A monster's skin, now. If he was worthy of forgiveness once, he isn't anymore. He wonders if Mother will ever come to visit him again. Maybe it's for the best that she doesn't have to go on any more treks through his wasteland of a brain.
Leo reaches out, scrabbling for something to ground him. His hands wrap around a sword and he pulls it close, savoring the smooth press of wood against his chest. He rubs the exposed piece of blade, still laughing, as fresh tears stain the hilt.
He turns to look over at Saki, at the almost expectant look in his eyes. Will Leo give him what he wants? Will he let him live, and take the risks that come with it? Trade him back to the Foot for mutagen to save Donnie, even though there are so many ways that could go wrong?
He's never had to make such a choice before, never had someone’s life in his hands like this.. Another interesting new thing to explore.
Or, who knows? Maybe he won't have to make a choice. Maybe he'll just stay in this filthy little hole in the earth, laughing and laughing, until the world is as ashy and ruined as his heart.