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  "description": "It's an expression used very frequently—'married to the job', 'my second husband', 'if you love her so much, why don't you marry her'. It's almost never meant literally, of course. It's used in jest, or as an exaggerated reach. But when it's spoken so nonchalantly...and [i]repeatedly[/i]...one Boxer seems to think it might be serious this time.\n\n[s]Job 35:11[/s]\n\n[iconname]DreamGod[/iconname]—well, look at that! A scripture from my [s]favorite book of the Bible[/s]! Yes, believe it or not, before I discovered the truth, I used to actually read [s]the Word[/s]. Ignorant, I know. But I digress. This chapter is one of my favorites, to no one's surprise. We're getting pretty close to the end of this series!\n\nThis story contains humans in sexual situations. Please follow the link here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/42670539/chapters/124177810#workskin",
  "description_bbcode_parsed": "<span style='word-wrap: break-word;'>It&#039;s an expression used very frequently&mdash;&#039;married to the job&#039;, &#039;my second husband&#039;, &#039;if you love her so much, why don&#039;t you marry her&#039;. It&#039;s almost never meant literally, of course. It&#039;s used in jest, or as an exaggerated reach. But when it&#039;s spoken so nonchalantly...and <em>repeatedly</em>...one Boxer seems to think it might be serious this time.<br /><br /><span class='strikethrough'>Job 35:11</span><br /><br />\r\n\t\t\t\t\t<table style='display: inline-block; vertical-align:bottom;'>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<tr>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<td style='vertical-align: middle; border: none;'>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div style='width: 50px; height: 50px; position: relative; margin: 0px auto;'>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<a style='position: relative; border: 0px;' href='https://inkbunny.net/DreamGod'><img class='shadowedimage' style='border: 0px;' src='https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/usericons/small/278/278042_DreamGod_morexis_discord_emote.png' width='50' height='50' alt='DreamGod' title='DreamGod' /></a>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t</div>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t</td>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<td style='vertical-align: bottom; font-size: 10pt;'>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span style='position: relative; top: 2px;'><a href='https://inkbunny.net/DreamGod' class='widget_userNameSmall'>DreamGod</a></span>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t</td>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t</tr>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t</table>&mdash;well, look at that! A scripture from my <span class='strikethrough'>favorite book of the Bible</span>! Yes, believe it or not, before I discovered the truth, I used to actually read <span class='strikethrough'>the Word</span>. Ignorant, I know. But I digress. This chapter is one of my favorites, to no one&#039;s surprise. We&#039;re getting pretty close to the end of this series!<br /><br />This story contains humans in sexual situations. Please follow the link here: <a href=\"https://archiveofourown.org/works/42670539/chapters/124177810#workskin\" rel=\"nofollow\">https://archiveofourown.org/works/42670539/chapters/124...</a></span>",
  "writing": "Lollipop always enjoyed the obedience school. She liked meeting the other dogs  -  particularly Marty  -  learning new things and pleasing her master, Alonso. At least, that's what everyone calls him except his mother (she calls him Juan).\n\nMarty was a young Golden Lab, not even a year old. She was only a bit older herself, and as a solid, tan Boxer, she couldn't compare for his cuteness. The boy was beautiful. And he was nice, and funny, if a little meek. Lollipop always tried to sit next to him. He was a fast learner, but that wasn't the main thing that drew her to him.\n\n\"Alright class, today we have a new member,\" the human instructor called to the people. \"This is Wanda, and her dog Natalie.\"\n\nNatalie was a Golden Retriever, maybe as old as two. Her fur was a rich, almost red that missed Mercury's Irish Setter by just a few shades. She was wagging her tail and bouncing around, completely untrained! She should have been taken to school ages ago.\n\n\"Just find a place,\" the instructor said.\n\nWanda walked right over and wedged herself between Alonso and Marty's owner, Felicia. Lollipop narrowed her eyes, particularly when she heard Marty say, \"Hey, Natalie! I'm Marty!\"\n\nA low voice to her right said, \"Getting a little close, don't you think?\"\n\nStartled, the distracted Boxer glanced to her right, where she'd been crowded up against a full-blooded Doberman, grinning down at her with glistening teeth. She shrank away, giving him space. \"Uh, sorry. Beau.\"\n\nBeau was fit, his short hair revealing the muscles along his body. He had a stub for a tail, but never seemed to wag it. Maybe he was embarrassed? \"Don't worry about it,\" he said, his grin softening. You should worry about [i]her[/i],\" he said, nodding his head in Natalie's direction.\n\n\"What? Why?\"\n\n\"She's young, and pretty, and Marty seems to be taking quite a liking to her.\"\n\nThe Boxer glanced over again, where the two Goldens sat talking. She could feel her face heating up, but still she said, \"Why should that matter?\"\n\n\"I'm not an idiot, Lollipop. You like him. He'll be a good catch in a few months, but not if he's already tied up,\" the big, black dog replied.\n\nShe glanced back at the two thoughtfully, listening as Alonso made small talk with Beau's owner, Vanessa. Vanessa's skin matched her dog's coat, her braided hair even the same caramel color. Actually, Alonso matched [i]her[/i] pretty well, too. Lollipop laughed to herself, deciding it was true that dogs grew to match their owners, even though a quick scan down the class would have shown that only those two examples fit.\n\nThe class began almost as suddenly as it ended. The work was as hard as always, as Lollipop fought her instinct to go over and sniff other dogs, jump and play with Alonso, or to snatch food. She wasn't perfect, but she was getting better, and she snorted to see that Natalie was a complete mess. When class was over, she saw Natalie talking to Beau, while their owners chatted.\n\nWanda was lily white, and a strong contrast to Vanessa, but they talked politely to each other. Marty and Felicia had already left, so Lollipop had no one to talk to, and neither did Alonso. \"Heel,\" he commanded, starting to walk away, when Vanessa interrupted the chit-chat.\n\n\"Hey, Alonso!\"\n\nHe stopped. \"Yes?\" His accent was still quite noticeable, especially next to the crisp clarity of Vanessa's voice.\n\n\"I was wondering if you wanted to get some drinks after class today?\"\n\nHe appraised that offer for a moment. \"Like...a date?\"\n\nShe laughed, the sounds rhythmic and lyrical. \"No, just drinks. I'm already taken.\"\n\nJuan smiled. \"Then sure, I'd like that.\"\n\nBeau looked up at Vanessa, then over at Juan, then down to Lollipop and said, \"[i]Oh.[/i]\"\n\nLollipop blinked. \"Oh?\"\n\n\"Don't mind me,\" he said simply.\n\nThey went to a nearby Chili's, with the two dogs tied up next to their outdoor table as Vanessa and Alonso talked, sipping beers.\n\n\"So where'd you get her?\" Vanessa asked, pointing to Lollipop.\n\n\"There's a breeder up by Stilton; got her as a little pup,\" Alonso said. He was about to ask about Beau, but was interrupted.\n\n\"Why'd you want a dog?\"\n\nHe blinked. \"Always had one as a kid, and I guess I was just...lonely, you know? I wish my apartment were a little bigger, but I make sure to take her for walks, and there's the obedience school.\"\n\nVanessa nodded. \"Girlfriend like dogs?\"\n\nAlonso paused. \"Look -\"\n\n\"Relax, I'm just asking as a friend. I'm taken, remember?\"\n\n\"I, uh, don't have a girlfriend. It's hard, you know, with the job and, you know, caring for and teaching Lollipop. Don't have much time to find a nice Catholic girl who likes dogs. Or Latinos, in this town,\" he frowned.\n\nVanessa laughed, reminiscent of wind chimes. \"Don't I know it. This town is so white, the only colored folk are [i]dogs[/i],\" she joked, pointing at Beau and Lollipop.\n\n\"She fixed?\" the woman went on to say.\n\n\"Nah, like I said, I'm Catholic. You know, everything happens for a reason...?\"\n\n\"But with dogs, `everything' happens over and over again. I'm a Lutheran. Catholics really can't get their dogs spayed?\" she asked.\n\nAlonso took a gulp of Miller Light. \"We can. I just...I figure if I'm not getting any, at least maybe [i]she[/i] can, someday. What about your dog?\"\n\nBeau was intact, [i]that[/i] much was sure. His short tail did nothing to hide the thick, veiny balls tucked up against his tight haunches. Lollipop looked away politely. Vanessa said, \"Sex is just a natural expression with dogs. Seems like it would be unfair to take it away without his consent.\"\n\n\"So now dogs can consent?\" Alonso joked. \"Somehow I think if my little lady went into heat, Beau wouldn't think twice about asking [i]her[/i] opinion of it.\"\n\nLollipop's eyes went wide, heat rushing to her face. She glanced over at the Doberman, who was looking straight at her. Gulping, she looked away.\n\n\"She hasn't yet, huh? Gone into heat?\"\n\n\"What makes you say that?\"\n\nVanessa explained, \"If she had, you'd know that dogs can [i]definitely[/i] consent. When she does, just ask yourself what she's saying when she pushes her rump in other dogs' faces, or stares over her shoulder at them, with her little tail up. If that ain't consent, what is?\"\n\nNow Alonso was blushing.\n\nLollipop was shocked. She turned to Beau and said, \"I would [i]never[/i]. Not until marriage!\"\n\nBeau nodded, though she couldn't help but think he was being a little condescending. She wasn't about to sin in the eyes of God, no matter how much she wanted to.\n\n\"You're flushing,\" Vanessa laughed. \"We're talking about [i]dogs[/i]; it's only natural to them. You [i]really[/i] need to get laid, Alonso.\"\n\n\"Yeah, well...first I gotta meet a girl I want to marry. And I can't exactly start dating, not while Lollipop still needs so much attention,\" Juan said, smiling down at the Boxer.\n\n\"You're like me, then,\" Vanessa said. \"Married to your dog.\"\n\nBeau grunted, gazing down at Lollipop. \"She isn't kidding.\"\n\n\"Ha, yeah,\" Alonso said. Then he glanced at Vanessa, tilting his head. \"I thought you said you were taken?\"\n\n\"I am,\" Vanessa says, without further comment. \"Well, it's been nice talking to the only other P.O.C. in town, but I gotta get to my next appointment. See you next week?\"\n\n\"Uh...yeah,\" Alonso said, watching the woman plop a five down on the table to pay for her drink and walk her Doberman away.\n\nLollipop watched too, her jaw dropped. \"Did he mean what I [i]think [/i]he means!?\"\n\nThe remainder of this story contains humans in sexual situations. Please follow the link here: [url]https://archiveofourown.org/works/42670539/chapters/124177810[/url]\n\n",
  "writing_bbcode_parsed": "<span style='word-wrap: break-word;'>Lollipop always enjoyed the obedience school. She liked meeting the other dogs&nbsp;&nbsp;-&nbsp;&nbsp;particularly Marty&nbsp;&nbsp;-&nbsp;&nbsp;learning new things and pleasing her master, Alonso. At least, that&#039;s what everyone calls him except his mother (she calls him Juan).<br /><br />Marty was a young Golden Lab, not even a year old. She was only a bit older herself, and as a solid, tan Boxer, she couldn&#039;t compare for his cuteness. The boy was beautiful. And he was nice, and funny, if a little meek. Lollipop always tried to sit next to him. He was a fast learner, but that wasn&#039;t the main thing that drew her to him.<br /><br />&quot;Alright class, today we have a new member,&quot; the human instructor called to the people. &quot;This is Wanda, and her dog Natalie.&quot;<br /><br />Natalie was a Golden Retriever, maybe as old as two. Her fur was a rich, almost red that missed Mercury&#039;s Irish Setter by just a few shades. She was wagging her tail and bouncing around, completely untrained! She should have been taken to school ages ago.<br /><br />&quot;Just find a place,&quot; the instructor said.<br /><br />Wanda walked right over and wedged herself between Alonso and Marty&#039;s owner, Felicia. Lollipop narrowed her eyes, particularly when she heard Marty say, &quot;Hey, Natalie! I&#039;m Marty!&quot;<br /><br />A low voice to her right said, &quot;Getting a little close, don&#039;t you think?&quot;<br /><br />Startled, the distracted Boxer glanced to her right, where she&#039;d been crowded up against a full-blooded Doberman, grinning down at her with glistening teeth. She shrank away, giving him space. &quot;Uh, sorry. Beau.&quot;<br /><br />Beau was fit, his short hair revealing the muscles along his body. He had a stub for a tail, but never seemed to wag it. Maybe he was embarrassed? &quot;Don&#039;t worry about it,&quot; he said, his grin softening. You should worry about <em>her</em>,&quot; he said, nodding his head in Natalie&#039;s direction.<br /><br />&quot;What? Why?&quot;<br /><br />&quot;She&#039;s young, and pretty, and Marty seems to be taking quite a liking to her.&quot;<br /><br />The Boxer glanced over again, where the two Goldens sat talking. She could feel her face heating up, but still she said, &quot;Why should that matter?&quot;<br /><br />&quot;I&#039;m not an idiot, Lollipop. You like him. He&#039;ll be a good catch in a few months, but not if he&#039;s already tied up,&quot; the big, black dog replied.<br /><br />She glanced back at the two thoughtfully, listening as Alonso made small talk with Beau&#039;s owner, Vanessa. Vanessa&#039;s skin matched her dog&#039;s coat, her braided hair even the same caramel color. Actually, Alonso matched <em>her</em> pretty well, too. Lollipop laughed to herself, deciding it was true that dogs grew to match their owners, even though a quick scan down the class would have shown that only those two examples fit.<br /><br />The class began almost as suddenly as it ended. The work was as hard as always, as Lollipop fought her instinct to go over and sniff other dogs, jump and play with Alonso, or to snatch food. She wasn&#039;t perfect, but she was getting better, and she snorted to see that Natalie was a complete mess. When class was over, she saw Natalie talking to Beau, while their owners chatted.<br /><br />Wanda was lily white, and a strong contrast to Vanessa, but they talked politely to each other. Marty and Felicia had already left, so Lollipop had no one to talk to, and neither did Alonso. &quot;Heel,&quot; he commanded, starting to walk away, when Vanessa interrupted the chit-chat.<br /><br />&quot;Hey, Alonso!&quot;<br /><br />He stopped. &quot;Yes?&quot; His accent was still quite noticeable, especially next to the crisp clarity of Vanessa&#039;s voice.<br /><br />&quot;I was wondering if you wanted to get some drinks after class today?&quot;<br /><br />He appraised that offer for a moment. &quot;Like...a date?&quot;<br /><br />She laughed, the sounds rhythmic and lyrical. &quot;No, just drinks. I&#039;m already taken.&quot;<br /><br />Juan smiled. &quot;Then sure, I&#039;d like that.&quot;<br /><br />Beau looked up at Vanessa, then over at Juan, then down to Lollipop and said, &quot;<em>Oh.</em>&quot;<br /><br />Lollipop blinked. &quot;Oh?&quot;<br /><br />&quot;Don&#039;t mind me,&quot; he said simply.<br /><br />They went to a nearby Chili&#039;s, with the two dogs tied up next to their outdoor table as Vanessa and Alonso talked, sipping beers.<br /><br />&quot;So where&#039;d you get her?&quot; Vanessa asked, pointing to Lollipop.<br /><br />&quot;There&#039;s a breeder up by Stilton; got her as a little pup,&quot; Alonso said. He was about to ask about Beau, but was interrupted.<br /><br />&quot;Why&#039;d you want a dog?&quot;<br /><br />He blinked. &quot;Always had one as a kid, and I guess I was just...lonely, you know? I wish my apartment were a little bigger, but I make sure to take her for walks, and there&#039;s the obedience school.&quot;<br /><br />Vanessa nodded. &quot;Girlfriend like dogs?&quot;<br /><br />Alonso paused. &quot;Look -&quot;<br /><br />&quot;Relax, I&#039;m just asking as a friend. I&#039;m taken, remember?&quot;<br /><br />&quot;I, uh, don&#039;t have a girlfriend. It&#039;s hard, you know, with the job and, you know, caring for and teaching Lollipop. Don&#039;t have much time to find a nice Catholic girl who likes dogs. Or Latinos, in this town,&quot; he frowned.<br /><br />Vanessa laughed, reminiscent of wind chimes. &quot;Don&#039;t I know it. This town is so white, the only colored folk are <em>dogs</em>,&quot; she joked, pointing at Beau and Lollipop.<br /><br />&quot;She fixed?&quot; the woman went on to say.<br /><br />&quot;Nah, like I said, I&#039;m Catholic. You know, everything happens for a reason...?&quot;<br /><br />&quot;But with dogs, `everything&#039; happens over and over again. I&#039;m a Lutheran. Catholics really can&#039;t get their dogs spayed?&quot; she asked.<br /><br />Alonso took a gulp of Miller Light. &quot;We can. I just...I figure if I&#039;m not getting any, at least maybe <em>she</em> can, someday. What about your dog?&quot;<br /><br />Beau was intact, <em>that</em> much was sure. His short tail did nothing to hide the thick, veiny balls tucked up against his tight haunches. Lollipop looked away politely. Vanessa said, &quot;Sex is just a natural expression with dogs. Seems like it would be unfair to take it away without his consent.&quot;<br /><br />&quot;So now dogs can consent?&quot; Alonso joked. &quot;Somehow I think if my little lady went into heat, Beau wouldn&#039;t think twice about asking <em>her</em> opinion of it.&quot;<br /><br />Lollipop&#039;s eyes went wide, heat rushing to her face. She glanced over at the Doberman, who was looking straight at her. Gulping, she looked away.<br /><br />&quot;She hasn&#039;t yet, huh? Gone into heat?&quot;<br /><br />&quot;What makes you say that?&quot;<br /><br />Vanessa explained, &quot;If she had, you&#039;d know that dogs can <em>definitely</em> consent. When she does, just ask yourself what she&#039;s saying when she pushes her rump in other dogs&#039; faces, or stares over her shoulder at them, with her little tail up. If that ain&#039;t consent, what is?&quot;<br /><br />Now Alonso was blushing.<br /><br />Lollipop was shocked. She turned to Beau and said, &quot;I would <em>never</em>. Not until marriage!&quot;<br /><br />Beau nodded, though she couldn&#039;t help but think he was being a little condescending. She wasn&#039;t about to sin in the eyes of God, no matter how much she wanted to.<br /><br />&quot;You&#039;re flushing,&quot; Vanessa laughed. &quot;We&#039;re talking about <em>dogs</em>; it&#039;s only natural to them. You <em>really</em> need to get laid, Alonso.&quot;<br /><br />&quot;Yeah, well...first I gotta meet a girl I want to marry. And I can&#039;t exactly start dating, not while Lollipop still needs so much attention,&quot; Juan said, smiling down at the Boxer.<br /><br />&quot;You&#039;re like me, then,&quot; Vanessa said. &quot;Married to your dog.&quot;<br /><br />Beau grunted, gazing down at Lollipop. &quot;She isn&#039;t kidding.&quot;<br /><br />&quot;Ha, yeah,&quot; Alonso said. Then he glanced at Vanessa, tilting his head. &quot;I thought you said you were taken?&quot;<br /><br />&quot;I am,&quot; Vanessa says, without further comment. &quot;Well, it&#039;s been nice talking to the only other P.O.C. in town, but I gotta get to my next appointment. See you next week?&quot;<br /><br />&quot;Uh...yeah,&quot; Alonso said, watching the woman plop a five down on the table to pay for her drink and walk her Doberman away.<br /><br />Lollipop watched too, her jaw dropped. &quot;Did he mean what I <em>think </em>he means!?&quot;<br /><br />The remainder of this story contains humans in sexual situations. Please follow the link here: <a href=\"https://archiveofourown.org/works/42670539/chapters/124177810\" rel=\"nofollow\">https://archiveofourown.org/works/42670539/chapters/124177810</a><br /><br /></span>",
  "pools_count": 1,
  "title": "Catholic Bitches, Chapter 24: Holy Matrimony",
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  "public": "t",
  "mimetype": "image/jpeg",
  "pagecount": "1",
  "rating_id": "2",
  "rating_name": "Adult",
  "ratings": [
    {
      "content_tag_id": "4",
      "name": "Sexual Themes",
      "description": "Erotic imagery, sexual activity or arousal",
      "rating_id": "2"
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  "submission_type_id": "12",
  "type_name": "Writing - Document",
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  "comments_count": "5",
  "views": "594"
}