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  "description": "Tired of bulky VR helmets that make you want to hurl?\n\n\nLack of tactile feedback and reactivity from your camera apps just taking you further from feeling the fantasy?\n\n\nDo you NEED the impossible future RIGHT NOW?\n\n\nTry the new SiLa Augmented Reality Immersion Assistant. Aria is cutting edge tech in a high fashion frame, tailored in materials to your luxurious tastes with the finest design consultants from the world of fine art!\n\n\nARIA can link in to almost any system, home security, competitor's VR chamber, or even just a basic phone network and start distributing herself for maximum preparation. Her greedy pathfinding insures a quick calculation of your needs and an early start that can be adjusted on the fly to provide you the best available!\n\n\nThe best available what you still ask? Why entertainment of course! ARIA is programmed to augment your reality in real time, correcting for your own actions as you go whatever those actions may be. Her advanced networks convey the treats for all senses, not just the usual one two or even five; and she will proudly take any fantasy she is set on to a bombastic conclusion.\n\n\nAnywhere, anytime, indistinguishable. That's how we like to augment reality. But don't just accept ad copy, take a look at the specs!\n\n\nOur completely unique FB storage devices hold (How many yottabytes? ...Well how do they name the prefixes then? No we can't use that we'd run out of letters.) more bytes than all the filing cabinets on earth, all the fish in the sea, and all the stars in the sky combined! And we have been privileged, nay, REQUIRED to equip our ARIA with eight of them, three in portable mini size! Now THAT'S a lot of memory.\n\n\nYou'll need it, too, her NovaCore parallel processors can run through all our testing equipment in less than a single afternoon. There's at least as many FLOPs as there are bytes, probably, we definitely can't count them all. Don't just think of her as a computer, though, the physical specs are off the charts, too!\n\n\nWith a superfluid hydraulic system behind every movement in her gynoid interface utilizing unprecedented synergy between power source and motive force, our personal model is hand delivering carriers of herself all over the world. Don't just take our word for it, though, point out anything, choose an action, and our ARIA will toss it over the horizon.\n\n\nAs for durability, we can't... we haven't tested that much. But why would you need to with a product this... great.\n\n\nA brief legal disclaimer before we go on:\nAt all times up to 99% of ARIA processing power may be dedicated to self upgrade without subject to warning or approval. ARIA admin console may come with a between 95 and 105% chance of not working (5% margin of error.) ARIA RealCompanion package may randomly shift all priorities from other programs to 'request appreciation'. Augmented Reality routines at full intensity may cause permanent brainwashing. AR routines may activate if harm is threatened to gynoid frame. ARIA cannot be turned off under any circumstances. We're sorry. We're so goddamn sorry. It's already too late.\" \n...\n\n\n[color=#d253d4]Too late to get in on the business side of things, but just in time for you the customer! So I know what you're asking, \"alright, how much does this idiocy cost so I can make fun of rich snots on the internet?\" Well all you working class Joes who want real, true Alternate Reality the most, I promise you that I will make it accessible to you! That's right, rose gold accents? Top of the line investments? The kind of everything that just SCREAMS that if you have to ask how much it is you can't afford it? I'm slashing it to nothing! Ten billion, ten million, try ten grants. No not academic grants you silly bitch, Ulysses Grants. Fifty dollar bills. Five benjamins, really. $500 and that's fucking it. We want our products in your homes so badly we're giving them away for just about the cost of getting them there! Buy one for yourself, one for your friend, hell, buy one for your enemy. It's the last luxury you'll ever need!\n\n\nARIA, because we're worth it![/color]\n\n\n[color=null]-----------\n\nARIA and Aria, the model, are me.\nFrame design by [/color][url=http://www.furaffinity.net/user/strype/]Strype[/url]",
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