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  "description": "[b]Questionable Content:[/b] This story contains\n\n• Pro-kobold propaganda\n• Species and size altering\n• Various suggestive comments\n• Silly pseudo-medical disclaimers\n\nThe kobolds would like you to know the benefits of becoming a kobold.\n\n[url=http://www.postybirb.com]Posted using PostyBirb[/url]",
  "description_bbcode_parsed": "<span style='word-wrap: break-word;'><strong>Questionable Content:</strong> This story contains<br /><br />&bull; Pro-kobold propaganda<br />&bull; Species and size altering<br />&bull; Various suggestive comments<br />&bull; Silly pseudo-medical disclaimers<br /><br />The kobolds would like you to know the benefits of becoming a kobold.<br /><br /><a href=\"http://www.postybirb.com\" rel=\"nofollow\">Posted using PostyBirb</a></span>",
  "writing": "# Welcome!\nGreetings adventurer! Have you considered taking a break from a life of battle and travel? Would you like to join a close-knit community dedicated to something greater? Then you—yes **you!**—should try our new and improved Potions of Lesser Monstrous Humanoid!\n\nDon’t let the name dissuade you! Our potions are specialized to have precisely the intended effect. We’ve even color-coded them to match the color of the scales you’ll have! One swig of our brew will have you changing in no time at all. Choose a kobold experience ranging from `1d6` minutes to `3d12` days and our alchemists will get to work creating it for you.\n\n# Your Transformation\nOur fast-acting potions are designed to get you right into the experience of being small and scaly. You’ll spend less time\\* in transformation sickness and more time enjoying your new form.\n\nWe highly recommend sitting in one of our comfortable bean bag chairs when you consume our potion. The abrupt change in strength score and size might be disorienting if you try to stand! You’ll feel fine dragon scales rippling from your snout to your toes and tail, all while your body restructures itself to a kobold’s frame.\n\n*\\* Compared to our previous potions*\n\n## Benefits\nAs a kobold, you’ll experience many benefits that other humanoids miss! Your smaller size means everything will look bigger than you’re used to, including the food! Your dexterity bonus allows for all kinds of virtuosity and vice. You’ll be particularly good at sneaking around, especially in your preferred habitat, to prank your friends… or your enemies!\n\n# Your Kobold Community\nAll our experiences include a kobold ambassador to ease your transformation and transition. For short-term transformations, we offer a variety of private rooms on site, fully washed and sterilized after each guest.\n\nFor transformations longer than 24 hours, we highly recommend our live-in kobold warrens. You’ll be immersed in the day-to-day culture and experience life as one of our smaller, scaly friends. Offer your help around the lair or just soak in the atmosphere; the choice is yours!\n\nVIP packages including a visit from a dragon are available. If you’d like to learn why kobolds worship them, you’ll have a chance to join in and experience it first-hand!\n\n# Location & Hours\nDon’t worry about finding us. When you’re ready for our services, we’ll find you, any time, day or night. If you aren’t sure whether or not you’re ready to try being a kobold: You are, and we’ll see you soon!\n\n# Warnings\nSide effects may include\n\n* Itchy scales\n* Light sensitivity\n* Incessant yipping\n* Uncontrollable urge to worship dragons\n* Permanency on a critically failed CON save\n\nDo not take Potion of Lesser Monstrous Humanoid if you are allergic to any of its material components.\n\nAsk your doctor, wizard, or sorcerer if becoming a kobold is right for you.\n",
  "writing_bbcode_parsed": "<span style='word-wrap: break-word;'># Welcome!<br />Greetings adventurer! Have you considered taking a break from a life of battle and travel? Would you like to join a close-knit community dedicated to something greater? Then you&mdash;yes **you!**&mdash;should try our new and improved Potions of Lesser Monstrous Humanoid!<br /><br />Don&rsquo;t let the name dissuade you! Our potions are specialized to have precisely the intended effect. We&rsquo;ve even color-coded them to match the color of the scales you&rsquo;ll have! One swig of our brew will have you changing in no time at all. Choose a kobold experience ranging from `1d6` minutes to `3d12` days and our alchemists will get to work creating it for you.<br /><br /># Your Transformation<br />Our fast-acting potions are designed to get you right into the experience of being small and scaly. You&rsquo;ll spend less time\\* in transformation sickness and more time enjoying your new form.<br /><br />We highly recommend sitting in one of our comfortable bean bag chairs when you consume our potion. The abrupt change in strength score and size might be disorienting if you try to stand! You&rsquo;ll feel fine dragon scales rippling from your snout to your toes and tail, all while your body restructures itself to a kobold&rsquo;s frame.<br /><br />*\\* Compared to our previous potions*<br /><br />## Benefits<br />As a kobold, you&rsquo;ll experience many benefits that other humanoids miss! Your smaller size means everything will look bigger than you&rsquo;re used to, including the food! Your dexterity bonus allows for all kinds of virtuosity and vice. You&rsquo;ll be particularly good at sneaking around, especially in your preferred habitat, to prank your friends&hellip; or your enemies!<br /><br /># Your Kobold Community<br />All our experiences include a kobold ambassador to ease your transformation and transition. For short-term transformations, we offer a variety of private rooms on site, fully washed and sterilized after each guest.<br /><br />For transformations longer than 24 hours, we highly recommend our live-in kobold warrens. You&rsquo;ll be immersed in the day-to-day culture and experience life as one of our smaller, scaly friends. Offer your help around the lair or just soak in the atmosphere; the choice is yours!<br /><br />VIP packages including a visit from a dragon are available. If you&rsquo;d like to learn why kobolds worship them, you&rsquo;ll have a chance to join in and experience it first-hand!<br /><br /># Location &amp; Hours<br />Don&rsquo;t worry about finding us. When you&rsquo;re ready for our services, we&rsquo;ll find you, any time, day or night. If you aren&rsquo;t sure whether or not you&rsquo;re ready to try being a kobold: You are, and we&rsquo;ll see you soon!<br /><br /># Warnings<br />Side effects may include<br /><br />* Itchy scales<br />* Light sensitivity<br />* Incessant yipping<br />* Uncontrollable urge to worship dragons<br />* Permanency on a critically failed CON save<br /><br />Do not take Potion of Lesser Monstrous Humanoid if you are allergic to any of its material components.<br /><br />Ask your doctor, wizard, or sorcerer if becoming a kobold is right for you.<br /></span>",
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