Bambi’s Bottom It was a beautiful, sunny day in the forest, and Bambi was out with his friends Flower and Thumper. Bambi was having issues with bravery, and his father wanted him to be a more brave and qualified prince. The young deer and his pals were enjoying another day in paradise when Bambi’s rump began to act up. *PPPPFFFFRRRRTTT* Both of his friends turned around to look at the young prince, seeing him with a shocked look on his face. “Yuck! Bambi, was that you?” asked Thumper, waving his paw past his nose. “Yeah...sorry about that,” said the embarrassed deer, “I think I ate some bad grass this morning.” All of the sudden, Bambi made the same shocked look and pushed out another loud fart. *FFFFRRRRRPPPP* Flower began to wave his paw past his nose too. “Gross, Bambi,” said Flower, “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you need to make a number two!” Bambi’s stomach suddenly growled loudly. “Uh oh,” he said, crossing his hind legs and moving his tail down, “I think I do! But I still want to play with you guys!” “That’s okay!” said Thumper, “just try not to think about it.” The boys kept running around until they reached a dangerous-looking log. Bambi was about to enter, when… “Woah, Bambi! Don’t go in there!” said Flower. “Why not?” asked Bambi quizzically. “There’s a big scary porcupine in it. If you try to walk over the log, he’ll catch you for sure,” said Thumper. “Wait, don’t you guys get it? This is my opportunity to be brave! Dad will be so proud when we tell him about this!” said Bambi excitedly. The enthusiastic deer then hopped on the log (it was bridging a river) and started to walk across. Out of nowhere, a porcupine with sharp quills jumped out of the log and confronted Bambi. “What do you think yer doin’ on top of my log?! Don’t ya’ll have any respect?!” said the angered forest creature. Bambi immediately got frightened and started to run back in the direction he came, but the angry porcupine chased after him. On his way back, Bambi fell into the log because of a loose collection of bark. While Bambi’s side fell forward and down, the porcupine got launched from where he was standing and was about to land on Bambi. Not knowing what exactly to do, Bambi ducked for cover, leaving his hind end exposed and in the air. The porcupine saw this as the perfect opportunity to use his spikes, and landed on Bambi’s hindquarters with his back. Bambi shouted in pain and immediately ran back to his friends. “Bambi, are you okay?” said Thumper. “Yeah we saw what happened…looks like it hurt,” said Flower. Bambi turned his rear to his friends. “How does it look?”, he asked. Flower and Thumper were then presented with Bambi’s butt having been impaled with a dozen or so quills. “I’m not gonna lie,” said Thumper, “it ain’t pretty.” “Can you help me out here and pull them out?” asked Bambi. “Sure, pal,” said Thumper. The bunny rabbit hopped over to his friend’s backside and started to pull quills out. “OW!” said Bambi. “There’s gonna be a lot more where that came from,” said Thumper. The bunny pulled out a few more quills when he eventually believed he got them all. “Alright, got ‘em.” “It still really hurts, though! Are you sure?” asked Bambi. Thumper took a closer look at Bambi’s rump and found that there were more quills, but that they were under his tail. “You’re not gonna like this, but I need you to lift up your tail.” “Wait, why?” asked Bambi. “That’s where the rest of the quills are.” responded Thumper. “Seriously? Okay but please don’t peak at my…” “Don’t worry, Bambi. I’ll make sure not to stare,” said Thumper. Bambi then lifted up his tail slowly, revealing the remaining quills and his smelly pink tailhole. Thumper giggled at this and Bambi looked back to scold him while blushing. Thumper was about to pull another quill out, when he heard some distress in Bambi’s lower region. “Uh oh,” said the concerned deer. Right in Thumper’s face, Bambi let loose a huge, smelly fart. *PPPRRRRRFFFFTTTT* “GROSS! I was right by your butt when you did that!” said Thumper. “Sorry, Thumper, but we have a little problem,” said Bambi, “I might have to drop some deer pellets. “Blech, ya think?!” said the distressed rabbit. “I need you to take these quills out before I go, though,” said Bambi. “Really? Okay, fine. But try not to fart again!” said Thumper. The bunny continued to pull more quills from Bambi’s behind. Flower, meanwhile, was giggling the whole time at Bambi’s predicament. There were eventually two quills left when Bambi let loose another fart. Thumper ducked away just in time, and hopped back to pull the last two out. “Alright, that’s the last of ‘em,” said Thumper. You can go off to do what deers do now!” “I think I might have to go here. I can’t make it any farther,” said Bambi. The forest prince squatted low, lifted his tail up high, and then began to pee while letting one last fart loose. Flower was continuing to giggle until he heard some voices walking up the trail behind him. ‘Oh no,’ he thought to himself ‘that sounds like Ronno and Faline. If they see Bambi’s bottom, he’ll never hear the end of it from Ronno!’ “Bambi!” said Flower. “Not now, Flower,” said Thumper, “he’s trying to ‘go’.” Bambi was indeed now dropping some deer pellets. “But...but…” uttered Flower. Right at that moment, Ronno and Faline came within view of Bambi. Both gasped when they saw what Bambi was doing. His pink tailhole was exposed and was dropping deer business while he was also whizzing on the ground underneath him. In between pellets, Bambi farted loudly. *PPPRRRAAAFFFTTT* “Boy,” he said comically, “that grass really did a number on me, heh heh.” Thumper giggled at Bambi’s comment, then looked over towards Flower and saw that Bambi had an audience. “Uhhhh...Bambi? You might want to turn around…” said Thumper. “Hold on Thumper,” said Bambi, “I’m almost finished.” Bambi squatted even lower and managed to plop another dozen pellets before finally finishing and exhaling a long sigh of relief. “Ahhhhhh...thank goodness that’s over,” said Bambi. He turned around to see what business he had finished when he spotted Ronno and Faline giggling and eventually breaking out into laughter. Bambi made an audible gasp. “Bambi, I tried to tell you they were coming, but you wouldn’t listen!” said Flower. “HAHAHAHA, Bambi pooped himself!!!” yelled Ronno in a fit of laughter. “Stop it, Ronno! I really needed to go!” retorted Bambi. “You couldn’t even find a private place? What a coward!” said Ronno. Bambi looked over to Faline, who was blushing deeply and still giggling. Seeing that Faline was watching also made Bambi blush. In all of his embarrassment, he tried to address her with humor. “Sorry you had to see that, Faline,” said Bambi, “I guess when a deer’s gotta go, a deer’s gotta go.” “Ha ha, you’re so cute, Bambi,” said Faline, “just next time, find a more private place, because I got a pretty good look at your--” “--OKAY. Got it, thanks Faline.” said Bambi. Ronno pranced off with Faline, laughing like crazy. Bambi saw Faline turn around on her way out, and she blushed, causing Bambi to also blush and smile sheepishly, making sure his tail was covering his “special parts”. “Man, that was so embarrassing!” Bambi said, sitting and shoving his hooves in his face. “All this bathroom talk has made need to make a stinky too,” said Thumper, shoving his paws in between his haunches and jumping back and forth. “Well, I hope you can find a better place than I did…” said Bambi. Thumper thought for a moment, glanced over at the porcupine’s log, and got a naughty idea. “Hey, I know a good place,” said Thumper. The bunny rabbit waddled over to the log and hopped on top as quietly as he could, so as not to alert the porcupine. Bambi and Flower watched from the front of the log as Thumper proceeded to find a hole just about the size of his fluffy hind end on top of the log. “Wait, Thumper,” whispered Bambi, “are you gonna...in his house?” Thumper nodded with a naughty look on his face. He plopped his chubby butt on the hole while facing his friends. He decided he’d make really funny faces to make his friends laugh while he did his bunny business. He started off by tinkling into the logging with a really relaxed look on his face while Bambi and Flower were laughing at the piddling sound he was making. Thumper was only a few feet away from them, so Bambi checked inside the log and saw his pee coming from his privates and landing in a puddle. He started giggling at the display. “Hey, stop peeking!” Thumper whispered loudly to Bambi, “I can’t cover up down there right now.” Thumper was blushing and was trying his hardest not to be too embarrassed. “Hey, guys,” Thumper said as Bambi pulled his head back out of the log, “get ready for the main event! Hnnnnnggggghhh!!!!” Thumper grunted loudly and made a hilarious face for his friends while he started to push out bunny pellets. Bambi and Flower started giggling again and heard all of the pellets plopping into the bottom of the log. Bambi couldn’t resist taking another peek into the log, and he saw Thumper’s rump depositing tons of poop from his little pink tailhole. “Bambi, you’re doing it again…” said an irritated Thumper. “Haha, sorry,” said Bambi bashfully. Thumper grunted once more and plopped the rest of his pellets into the log. When he was finished, he got up and walked back towards his friends. “I sure hope he likes the presents I left,” said the bunny. “Hahaha!” laughed Flower, “he’s sure gonna get a nice surprise when he goes to the other side of the log.” “If he doesn’t smell it first,” said Bambi, “pee-yew!” And so, Bambi learned that day that if he felt nature calling, he needed to find a good spot to go right away. He just hoped that the rest of the forest would never hear about the “show” he put on.