{"submission_id":"2769962","keywords":[{"keyword_id":"10066","keyword_name":"bored","contributed":"f","submissions_count":"637"},{"keyword_id":"665914","keyword_name":"busywork","contributed":"f","submissions_count":"1"},{"keyword_id":"61635","keyword_name":"dark matter","contributed":"f","submissions_count":"31"},{"keyword_id":"49358","keyword_name":"male wolf","contributed":"f","submissions_count":"235"},{"keyword_id":"164","keyword_name":"wolf","contributed":"f","submissions_count":"158537"}],"hidden":"f","scraps":"f","favorite":"f","favorites_count":"0","create_datetime":"2022-07-21 20:00:18.192124+02","create_datetime_usertime":"21 Jul 2022 20:00 CEST","last_file_update_datetime":"2022-07-21 18:57:52.272164+02","last_file_update_datetime_usertime":"21 Jul 2022 18:57 CEST","username":"RexXusLP","user_id":"539202","user_icon_file_name":"238414_RexXusLP_do_asn_profilovka.png","user_icon_url_large":"https://nl.ib.metapix.net/usericons/large/238/238414_RexXusLP_do_asn_profilovka.png","user_icon_url_medium":"https://nl.ib.metapix.net/usericons/medium/238/238414_RexXusLP_do_asn_profilovka.png","user_icon_url_small":"https://nl.ib.metapix.net/usericons/small/238/238414_RexXusLP_do_asn_profilovka.png","file_name":"4109526_RexXusLP_bloody_cough.png","file_url_full":"https://nl.ib.metapix.net/files/full/4109/4109526_RexXusLP_bloody_cough.png","file_url_screen":"https://nl.ib.metapix.net/files/screen/4109/4109526_RexXusLP_bloody_cough.png","file_url_preview":"https://nl.ib.metapix.net/files/preview/4109/4109526_RexXusLP_bloody_cough.jpg","thumbnail_url_huge_noncustom":"https://nl.ib.metapix.net/files/preview/4109/4109526_RexXusLP_bloody_cough.jpg","thumbnail_url_large_noncustom":"https://nl.ib.metapix.net/thumbnails/large/4109/4109526_RexXusLP_bloody_cough_noncustom.jpg","thumbnail_url_medium_noncustom":"https://nl.ib.metapix.net/thumbnails/medium/4109/4109526_RexXusLP_bloody_cough_noncustom.jpg","thumb_medium_noncustom_x":"120","thumb_medium_noncustom_y":"90","thumb_large_noncustom_x":"200","thumb_large_noncustom_y":"150","thumb_huge_noncustom_x":"300","thumb_huge_noncustom_y":"225","files":[{"file_id":"4109526","file_name":"4109526_RexXusLP_bloody_cough.png","file_url_full":"https://nl.ib.metapix.net/files/full/4109/4109526_RexXusLP_bloody_cough.png","file_url_screen":"https://nl.ib.metapix.net/files/screen/4109/4109526_RexXusLP_bloody_cough.png","file_url_preview":"https://nl.ib.metapix.net/files/preview/4109/4109526_RexXusLP_bloody_cough.jpg","mimetype":"image/png","submission_id":"2769962","user_id":"539202","submission_file_order":"0","full_size_x":"2200","full_size_y":"1650","screen_size_x":"920","screen_size_y":"690","preview_size_x":"300","preview_size_y":"225","initial_file_md5":"a2e84be7dce134069b287b6cd02a099f","full_file_md5":"8da329c1e2de248dafe884dd0b1b0aa0","large_file_md5":"8dd7abff223700fa61e9ddb7ae1108ed","small_file_md5":"7fff18ae85743d32ac561135ae3ff9a5","thumbnail_md5":"650e61d6747af9771b101fb05899bbea","deleted":"f","create_datetime":"2022-07-21 18:57:52.272164+02","create_datetime_usertime":"21 Jul 2022 18:57 CEST","thumbnail_url_huge_noncustom":"https://nl.ib.metapix.net/files/preview/4109/4109526_RexXusLP_bloody_cough.jpg","thumbnail_url_large_noncustom":"https://nl.ib.metapix.net/thumbnails/large/4109/4109526_RexXusLP_bloody_cough_noncustom.jpg","thumbnail_url_medium_noncustom":"https://nl.ib.metapix.net/thumbnails/medium/4109/4109526_RexXusLP_bloody_cough_noncustom.jpg","thumb_medium_noncustom_x":"120","thumb_medium_noncustom_y":"90","thumb_large_noncustom_x":"200","thumb_large_noncustom_y":"150","thumb_huge_noncustom_x":"300","thumb_huge_noncustom_y":"225"}],"pools":[],"description":"When you think about suicide, fine, do what you think best. But ask yourself this, why do you want to die? What I think about this topic, people who commit suicides are too weak to continue further and are afraid of the criticism. They are great people who want the best in everything, yet life doesn't deliver. You take the knife, you want to do a quick stab in, not much blood, not much pain and be quickly in a better place. But what about everything we leave behind? Not much, our dead body for others to clean up, all the awful projects we abandoned to work on no more, our loved ones in the dangerous wild world.........\n\n“Fucking UNSAVEABLE BRAINDEADS!!!”\n\nYou fling the knife into the fridge, damage the carbon surface, take it out and... and... drop it and hug the unfortunate fridge, now a punching bag. \n...\n...\n“People, I love you right but I would have just... ENCLOSED YOU INTO A TINY ROOM AND CHILL YOUR FUCKING BRAINS DOWN!!!”\n_______________________________________________________________________________\n\nI will bring more into the table! More that isn't... this! But 2 years of me expecting to die of pulmonary embolism (I read too many articles about it on the internet, my mind's a mess, please knock me dead) but my body refusing to die is GREAT. VERY GREAT! LET'S REPEAT THAT EVERY DAY TO TRAUMATIZE ME FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE! \n\nYou know, so when I get the nostalgia for drawing, I never finish it! From time to time I pick an unfinished illustration and colour it. And what did I pick a few days ago? The one you see above this text! Great choice. I'll draw a dragon in a meadow next. If I don't cry my eyes out from its poor snout and its overall head being so scuffed first. (TwT)\n\n(oh yeah and this is a reedit because I forgot to put a little cautionary note into the illustration... don't get the wrong idea when you watch my sad pictures, please %( )","description_bbcode_parsed":"<span style='word-wrap: break-word;'>When you think about suicide, fine, do what you think best. But ask yourself this, why do you want to die? What I think about this topic, people who commit suicides are too weak to continue further and are afraid of the criticism. They are great people who want the best in everything, yet life doesn&#039;t deliver. You take the knife, you want to do a quick stab in, not much blood, not much pain and be quickly in a better place. But what about everything we leave behind? Not much, our dead body for others to clean up, all the awful projects we abandoned to work on no more, our loved ones in the dangerous wild world.........<br /><br />&ldquo;Fucking UNSAVEABLE BRAINDEADS!!!&rdquo;<br /><br />You fling the knife into the fridge, damage the carbon surface, take it out and... and... drop it and hug the unfortunate fridge, now a punching bag. <br />...<br />...<br />&ldquo;People, I love you right but I would have just... ENCLOSED YOU INTO A TINY ROOM AND CHILL YOUR FUCKING BRAINS DOWN!!!&rdquo;<br />_______________________________________________________________________________<br /><br />I will bring more into the table! More that isn&#039;t... this! But 2 years of me expecting to die of pulmonary embolism (I read too many articles about it on the internet, my mind&#039;s a mess, please knock me dead) but my body refusing to die is GREAT. VERY GREAT! LET&#039;S REPEAT THAT EVERY DAY TO TRAUMATIZE ME FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE! <br /><br />You know, so when I get the nostalgia for drawing, I never finish it! From time to time I pick an unfinished illustration and colour it. And what did I pick a few days ago? The one you see above this text! Great choice. I&#039;ll draw a dragon in a meadow next. If I don&#039;t cry my eyes out from its poor snout and its overall head being so scuffed first. (TwT)<br /><br />(oh yeah and this is a reedit because I forgot to put a little cautionary note into the illustration... don&#039;t get the wrong idea when you watch my sad pictures, please %( )</span>","writing":"","writing_bbcode_parsed":"<span style='word-wrap: break-word;'></span>","pools_count":0,"title":"Refuse To Die","deleted":"f","public":"t","mimetype":"image/png","pagecount":"1","rating_id":"1","rating_name":"Mature","ratings":[{"content_tag_id":"3","name":"Violence","description":"Mild violence","rating_id":"1"}],"submission_type_id":"1","type_name":"Picture/Pinup","guest_block":"f","friends_only":"f","comments_count":"0","views":"4"}