The day had come. The anniversary of the day Sonic fell to Infinite and the events that followed changed the lives of everyone in so many ways. 

In the six months the bastard had brutalized his body, shattered his mind, and victimized him in every way possible, it took just as long to make some progress in his recovery. After the final showdown with the jackal, the two hedgehogs were discovered by an incoming Resistance vessel, who were investigating the energy wave the Phantom Ruby produced when the fallen hero ripped it from their enemy's chest. 

With Infinite and the powers of the gem off the board, Knuckles was able to hold true to his vow and lead the rebels to victory against Eggman, whom went into hiding following his defeat. Although no one knows where the evil scientist scurried off to, those who didn't switch to the newly formed Restoration Committee under Amy Roses's leadership elected to continue the hunt and pursuit of justice. Tails eventually returned and joined with the Restoration, rebuilding and reprogramming Eggman's destroyed robots to aid in the construction efforts. Despite his friends all rallying behind him with their full support, the young fox couldn't help but feel ashamed for his absence during the war and especially when Sonic and Shadow were missing. 

"You're here now, that's what matters," Shadow assured him when he came to visit them in the hospital. While the Ultimate Life Form was discharged within a couple of days, Sonic spent weeks in the ICU recupertating from his many injuries while under sedation and heavy guard. Although the black hedgehog objected to the anethesthia, given his partner's unstable history, the doctors convinced him that it was much safer and more conducive to his recovery this way. 

Once his wounds were healed, he was transported to a private room to continue being monitored and treated for his mental trauma. Sonic was often visited by his friends, all of whom would shower him with love, compassion, and understanding. As much as he appreciated their kind gestures, he still felt strangely out of place. Their attention was usually more than he could handle and often led to either embarrassing tears or complete withdrawal. Despite treatment, other irregularities remained in his personality as well, such as dissociatingly staring off into nothingness, cowering in corners when alone, and sleeping on the floor regardless of the advice of the medical team. When questioned or encouraged to rest in a bed, he always shut down, his shame taking prescendence of his new habit. Despite how uncomfortable it was, he just couldn't let it go yet much less explain it. 

However, no matter what, Shadow was always there to defend him. 
Whenever he saw Sonic feeling overwhelmed from the company, he would politely ask the guests to leave. Whenever he saw him sinking into dark thoughts or spiraling into depression, he always pulled him back. Whenever he was pushed into uncomfortable situations by the physicians, Shadow would stand his ground against them. He understood all-too-well what his partner had experienced and wanted to help Sonic heal on his own terms and at HIS pace, no one elses. 

"You shouldn't enable him," the medical staff contested, "he needs proper treatment. He needs to follow doctor's orders. He needs to---". 

"Find his own way--DON'T push him!", Shadow warned with a snarl and protective presence, "He'll take those steps when he's ready. If you have an objections, you'll answer to me."

And so, every single night, the black hedgehog would grab some pillows and blankets and create a makeshift bed for them on the cold, tiled floor. 


On this night, while Shadow was engaged in the usual routine of straightening their sheets near the bed frame, Sonic felt compelled to admit something that had been bothering him. He knew this time was coming, and though it felt like it took forever to get here in one way, it also felt like it arrived in the blink of an eye.
With a meek voice, he stood near his partner, shuffling back and forth as he searched for the words.
"It's been a year since that first day...." he finally said while rubbing his stub-of-a-shoulder, "...and almost six months since the last...". As Shadow peered up, Sonic immediately looked away, "....things aren't getting any better...I'm not getting better."

The expression on the blue hedgehog's face was practically covered with doubt, sadness, and shame, but Shadow never made a single indication to agree with such a sentiment. Instead, he stood up to his partner and wrapped his strong, loving arms around his body, giving him the warmth and security he longed for yet was too embarrassed to request. 

"It will get better," he whispered in his ear soothingly as he tilted Sonic's head to plant a kiss. 
After the two laid on the floor, the broken hero pressed his face against the white fluff of his partner, who would then run his fingers through the fur of his head and rub the lower part of his back. Listening to Shadow's heartbeat was like a lullaby that gave the broken hero the added comfort he needed to drift into a deep sleep each night. This was their regular thing, and while some nights were pleasantly uneventful, there were sadly quite a few where the nights seemed neverending, and tonight was no exception. 

"N-NO--NO PLEASE!!! S-STOP!!! PLEASE!!!" Sonic cried out as he trashed within the blanket, his face contorting between fear, desperation, and pain. Though none of the psychiatrists could deduce what triggered these night terrors, they were always vivid for him, so much so that he would even fight off Shadow during his struggle for lucidity as he drifted between reliving the hell he went through and facing the reality that he often imagined was just a dream. 

"--P-PLEASE NO MORE!!! I C-CAN'T---!!!" He continued to scream as he violently jerked, his legs kicking while Shadow quickly rolled over to hold him close.

"IT'S OKAY, SONIC!!! It's okay. Take deep breaths," spoke the black hedgehog as he held his partner tightly, taking the beating of his flailing arm until he finally slowed to a stop. 
 
Gasping with quivering eyes as sweat dripped from his brow and boiling with frustration, he pulled away from Shadow in a frantic huff. Rolling over, he tucked his knees to his chest while he pressed his forehead against the floor, beating it with his fist, "WHEN IS THIS GOING TO STOP?!" he cried, rocking slightly forward and backward so that his head pounded on the tile. "--I TRIED THE THERAPY! I'VE TRIED THE MEDICINE!! NOTHING WORKS!!! AM I GOING TO BE THIS PATHETIC FOREVER?!?!?! --STUPID! --STUPID! --IDIOT!!!!" 

Shadow sat up and wrapped his hands around Sonic's shoulders, massaging them tenderly while searching for anyway possible to help his partner through the strife. He could feel him trembling under his grip, his anger at what he suffered still defining and controlling his life. 
"It's no use....I'm hopeless..." the blue hedgehog choked out in his tears as he shrugged Shadow's comforting touch off.
It became clear that Sonic's patience with himself had expired and he tipping over the edge of giving up. With a heavy heart, the Ultimate Life Form did the only thing he could do, he sighed and opened up to him.

"When Maria...died, I didn't have a chance to mourn her--," he began. 

In-between his erratic breaths and sniffles, Sonic glanced around in surprise, his breathing slowing so he could hear his partner intently. 

"--so whenever I remember her and her wish, it hurts..." he continued, relunctantly making eye contact with the broken hero as he sat up to face him.

Shadow's words were steeped in sadness, floating out of his mouth like butterflies nearing their end in the bitterness of winter. Despite how close they had gotten, the brooding hedgehog still kept his past buried and his emotions of that time closed off. Whenever he was asked about his life on the Ark, he often recited that looking back wouldn't change anything before abruptly ending the conversation and leaving. He just couldn't stand bearing his soul or sharing his sorrows, so his willingness to stay, to bring up one of his most painful memories to reach his partner was a sign of how desperate he was to help. 

Shadow crossed his arms as his teeth began to grit together, "I'm not what I was designed to be 50 years ago...and I'm not bound by any obligations to ghosts from my past. However...sometimes....I hear her voice whispering to me...I see things that reminds me of her...and rather than find joy in these memories, instead, all the regret, heartache, and rage rush back."

His voice lowered as he sank backwards, the weight of the despair he was boldly laying out in front of him being heavier than he anticipated, yet despite this, for Sonic's sake, he continued to share his secret wound, "...There are times it feels like I just lost her... I can still hear the gunshot. See the blood forming on her blouse. In those moments, I hate myself more than anything."

"Shadow..." Sonic said lamently while laying his hand on the black hedgehog's tightly-crossed forearms, "You couldn't do anything to save her. You tried, I know you did! But there are somethings we just can't change...and..."

"--AND WE HAVE TO MOVE ON," he interjected angrily, catching the blue blur off-guard. "IT'S EASIER SAID THAN DONE, SONIC. ---I FAILED TO SAVE HER JUST AS I FAILED TO SAVE YOU! I...I KEEP REPEATING MY MISTAKES AND THOSE I CARE ABOUT SUFFER FROM THEM!!!" Shadow's rage brought him to his feet while he held himself even more seclusively, retreating into an invisible shell to either block out the pain or contain it deep within. 

Sonic felt both heartbroken and ignorant. 
"How did I not see it?" he thought as he began kicking himself. Shadow was always incredibly strong, as steely as they come, and though Sonic knew he had a softer, sensitive side, he never knew it was corroded with so much guilt and anguish. 
The trauma he experienced that, to this day and age, would be considered ancient history was still fairly recent for him. Not to mention that he was tortured by Infinite as well for over a week. 

"How did it not phase him?" he wondered. Maybe it's not because Shadow is strong, but because losing his family in such a violent way numbed him? The thought made him instinctively start rubbing the site of his amputation over and over, knowing all-too-well how emotions could feel both raw and numb at the same time to such an overwhelming degree that it was just easier to choose the latter in order to survive. But his partner had always been a pro at hiding his feelings. One to bear the burdens in painful silence. The blue hedgehog realized that in all the turmoil he faced and the difficulties he was having in overcoming them, he had become selfish along the way. He hated that he had been leaning on Shadow so much for so long, not taking into account his suffering nor noticing how much unwarranted guilt his partner carried for his condition. Sonic couldn't let this stand. He had to set the record straight and make this right!  

"Shadow, I'm so sorry. I had no idea you were going through this, but you do realize that I wouldn't be alive right now if you hadn't saved me." 

"AND YOU WOULD HAVE STILL HAD BOTH YOUR ARMS IF I HAD DONE SOMETHING, ANYTHING, DIFFERENTLY!" he argued, prompting the blue hedgehog to rise to his feet as well while the intensity of the conversation increased tenfold.

"WHAT HAPPENED WASN'T YOUR FAULT!!! NONE OF IT WAS YOUR FAULT!!! YOU CAN'T KEEP BLAMING YOURSELF!!!" he shouted, his heart practically screaming louder than his voice.

With a quick turn, Shadow rebutted "NEITHER CAN YOU!!!" before yanking Sonic into his chest for a forceful hug, hiding his own face from view in the tuck of his neck. 

In the silence that followed, the blue blur blankly stared into space as he tried to comprehend when and where the topic turned, "Did---did you just give me a counseling session?" he questioned frankly after reviewing what was said.

In a scoff, the black hedgehog admitted, "I think it served us both....You're getting better, Sonic. I know it hasn't happened overnight like you'd want it to, but you're making progress...and because of you, so am I." 

Feeling his partner's breath on his neck, his hands surrounding him, and his warmth seeping into his own body, Sonic realized that their unbreakable bond was more than he ever defined. They had both endured so much, but through their experiences, they grew as individuals and as a couple. Of course they still had a lot of healing to do, but there was comfort in that neither had to face their demons alone. The broken hero leaned in and returned Shadow's embrace with a genuine smile, inhaling his scent soothingly and cherishing this moment for the treasure it was. He started to think this was a miracle, this contentment, a feeling he never thought he'd experience again. 

And maybe one day he'll find that he; himself, is not completely broken after all.