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"submission_right_thumb_large_noncustom_y": "200", "submission_right_thumb_huge_noncustom_x": "187", "submission_right_thumb_huge_noncustom_y": "300" } ], "description": "[i]It's no wonder that one would turn out this way.[/i]\n\n\nBulle has his reasons. Or, at least he lets himself [i]believe[/i] he does.\nI drew this uhhhhh March last year? There's a second image that I haven't finished that was meant to go with it, but I'll just post separately for now.\n\n~~~\n\nIn life news, I moved to a house a couple months ago, and it was hell! \n[b]TW for insects and animal illess.[/b] Going to ramble a lot about that,,, please feel free to skip reading this lol\n\nIt was a really long and horrible process that has left my mind and body shot for awhile, but we so desperately needed it because we were living in cockroach infested apartment hell. I was the only one of the people I'm living with that had any ability to deal with insects (I actually really like them generally), my partner being ESPECIALLY terrified to a severe point of them, so I was left with doing 100% of the cooking, cleaning, and killing of hundreds of cockroaches every day. We had our place treated for them 4 times but the building management was so fucking lazy about it and refused to do the whole building at once, so it never helped (in fact only making things worse for a couple weeks). We would wake up to them crawling on our faces. With clinically bad insomnia and sleep apnea I'm already too paranoid to treat, this wasn't too much fun.\nKilling bugs has always been really really hard for me (I used to cry when bullies would force me to watch them kill spiders, because they found it amusing that I always begged them to let me take them outside instead), and I always found roaches super cute in the past. But this experience left me traumatized in a whole new way (yay), not to mention made me very very sick.\nI've drained my entire savings from our move because we HAD to take our time with it, spending an extra month of rent on the old place (triple checking every single item we took because they were in EVERYTHING), spending hundreds alone in bags and plastic to wrap everything in because we couldn't use regular boxes (roaches love hiding in cardboard), and throwing out most of our furniture and appliances that I've had to replace.\nEven now, I'll unwrap something that has been sealed airtight within two plastic bags for over a month and a half, and out of it will crawl a few roaches, alive and well...\nWith our efforts I don't think will have another infestation here, and believe me it is still a huge relief to be out of that place now, but I still see one crawling around every once in a while and panic that it's just not over. All of us have a trigger response to any speck or crumb we think we see moving now, and I don't see that going away for a while.\nThe good news is my cat's dementia and liver disease doesn't seem to be progressing! She had a REALLY major surgery a month or so before the move to remove a very very large nasty cancerous growth (also one of the reasons i am currently super broke), but honestly with everything I am just so thankful every day that she's still with me. \nWe're all just, recovering. I think I'm finally on track again to get over the fibromyalgia flair ups (and some other pains) from the constant tension of the move and worries for my cat and partner.\nI just want to draw and create again. I just want to be settled and stable. I'm getting there.", "description_bbcode_parsed": "It's no wonder that one would turn out this way.


Bulle has his reasons. Or, at least he lets himself believe he does.
I drew this uhhhhh March last year? There's a second image that I haven't finished that was meant to go with it, but I'll just post separately for now.

~~~

In life news, I moved to a house a couple months ago, and it was hell!
TW for insects and animal illess. Going to ramble a lot about that,,, please feel free to skip reading this lol

It was a really long and horrible process that has left my mind and body shot for awhile, but we so desperately needed it because we were living in cockroach infested apartment hell. I was the only one of the people I'm living with that had any ability to deal with insects (I actually really like them generally), my partner being ESPECIALLY terrified to a severe point of them, so I was left with doing 100% of the cooking, cleaning, and killing of hundreds of cockroaches every day. We had our place treated for them 4 times but the building management was so fucking lazy about it and refused to do the whole building at once, so it never helped (in fact only making things worse for a couple weeks). We would wake up to them crawling on our faces. With clinically bad insomnia and sleep apnea I'm already too paranoid to treat, this wasn't too much fun.
Killing bugs has always been really really hard for me (I used to cry when bullies would force me to watch them kill spiders, because they found it amusing that I always begged them to let me take them outside instead), and I always found roaches super cute in the past. But this experience left me traumatized in a whole new way (yay), not to mention made me very very sick.
I've drained my entire savings from our move because we HAD to take our time with it, spending an extra month of rent on the old place (triple checking every single item we took because they were in EVERYTHING), spending hundreds alone in bags and plastic to wrap everything in because we couldn't use regular boxes (roaches love hiding in cardboard), and throwing out most of our furniture and appliances that I've had to replace.
Even now, I'll unwrap something that has been sealed airtight within two plastic bags for over a month and a half, and out of it will crawl a few roaches, alive and well...
With our efforts I don't think will have another infestation here, and believe me it is still a huge relief to be out of that place now, but I still see one crawling around every once in a while and panic that it's just not over. All of us have a trigger response to any speck or crumb we think we see moving now, and I don't see that going away for a while.
The good news is my cat's dementia and liver disease doesn't seem to be progressing! She had a REALLY major surgery a month or so before the move to remove a very very large nasty cancerous growth (also one of the reasons i am currently super broke), but honestly with everything I am just so thankful every day that she's still with me.
We're all just, recovering. I think I'm finally on track again to get over the fibromyalgia flair ups (and some other pains) from the constant tension of the move and worries for my cat and partner.
I just want to draw and create again. I just want to be settled and stable. I'm getting there.", "writing": "", "writing_bbcode_parsed": "", "pools_count": 1, "title": "Reasons", "deleted": "f", "public": "t", "mimetype": "image/jpeg", "pagecount": "1", "rating_id": "2", "rating_name": "Adult", "ratings": [ { "content_tag_id": "4", "name": "Sexual Themes", "description": "Erotic imagery, sexual activity or arousal", "rating_id": "2" } ], "submission_type_id": "1", "type_name": "Picture/Pinup", "guest_block": "t", "friends_only": "f", "comments_count": "6", "views": "430" }