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So... this is the new series for Rory and Jackie, though frankly, it's mostly for Rory. I decided on the name [i]A Fox in Despair[/i] after a suggestion on one of my most recent journals from [name]anon1625343[/name] of calling it [i]A Fox in Recovery[/i]. That helped me come up with this name right here, so thanks for that. :3\n\nThese stories will focus on a much darker time in Rory's life: a time without Jackie and under Paul's thumb, unable to get out because he can't summon up the courage to stand up to him when he needs to most. This series is going to follow Rory through a rather hellish few months as he slowly and unwillingly becomes Paul's \"bitch\".\n\nI debated on going in this direction with Rory at all, but it feels like the right thing to do with his character, as fucked up as that sounds.\n\nThis story in particular focuses on what happens when he does try to stand up to Paul, as well as the strained relationship between him and his brother, Ivan.\n\nTelling you all to enjoy the story doesn't exactly sound right, given the context of what happens here, but I hope you all end up liking it.\n\n==========================================\n\nRating: 18+ for rape and abuse\nWord Count: 5,358","description_bbcode_parsed":"Hey, everyone. So... this is the new series for Rory and Jackie, though frankly, it's mostly for Rory. I decided on the name A Fox in Despair after a suggestion on one of my most recent journals from anon1625343 of calling it A Fox in Recovery. That helped me come up with this name right here, so thanks for that. :3
These stories will focus on a much darker time in Rory's life: a time without Jackie and under Paul's thumb, unable to get out because he can't summon up the courage to stand up to him when he needs to most. This series is going to follow Rory through a rather hellish few months as he slowly and unwillingly becomes Paul's "bitch".
I debated on going in this direction with Rory at all, but it feels like the right thing to do with his character, as fucked up as that sounds.
This story in particular focuses on what happens when he does try to stand up to Paul, as well as the strained relationship between him and his brother, Ivan.
Telling you all to enjoy the story doesn't exactly sound right, given the context of what happens here, but I hope you all end up liking it.
==========================================
Rating: 18+ for rape and abuse
Word Count: 5,358","writing":"“Rory, there’s only so much I can do for you if you won’t tell me what’s wrong.”\n\nI look up at the German Shepherd in front of me with a deadpan expression, obviously not amused. “What is there to tell? Like I said, I’m just going through a phase of depression… It should eventually clear up, and I’ll be fine.”\n\nThe female canine who is my social worker sighs and kneads her forehead before shaking her head. “There’s no such thing as a ‘phase of depression’. If you’re depressed, that’s something that needs to be taken care of. You need help, but I can only help you if you start telling me what’s bothering you. Betty and I could find you a counselor to go see, and—”\n\nPast caring at this point, I interrupt her. “Yeah, find me a counselor. And tell them about all my ‘escapades’, as you and Betty call them, and I’m sure they would just love to help me out instead of trying to ‘fix’ me like everyone else tries. Like you tried. And like Betty tries.”\n\nI’m sure she can hear the sarcasm dripping from my voice, as she just shakes her head again. “Not everyone is the enemy, Rory. I just wish I could get you to actually see that… Betty says she sees that you and Paul seem to be on better terms now. Maybe you could confide in him instead and at least get some of this out of your system and calm your nerves a bit.”\n\nAs she even mentions his name, my fur stands on end, and I get that same feeling in my stomach that I do when he’s near, but it’s not nearly as pronounced. “No, I’m fine. I don’t need to tell Paul anything. Besides, I’m pretty sure he already knows how messed up I am and the reasons why without me having to tell him.”\n\nI can’t tell her that he’s the reason I’m messed up right now. I know what he’d do to me. They’d have to launch an investigation, and I’m very sure that they wouldn’t find any actual evidence of misconduct with me. The dude is weirdly squeaky clean when it comes to his record, too, so they probably would assume he wouldn’t commit a crime like child rape. And then when all that was done… Oh, he’d be mad. So mad… And I’d feel most of the fallout from it, whether physically, sexually, or verbally…\n\nI think she can see my visceral reaction to Paul being brought up, but she doesn’t mention anything further about him. “Okay, well… What about Ivan? I know you two have had your differences in the past, but he’s told me even he’s concerned about you. He says it ‘throws him off’ to see you like this.”\n\nI almost snort in laughter at her suggestion. “Pfft, Ivan? As if… He’d just make fun of me if he found out I’m dealing with depression. Simple as that. He’s way meaner than you give him credit for. Both you and Betty treat him like an angel, but he’d never care about me.” My brother is the last person I’d want to talk to about this. He wouldn’t care. He would laugh and tell me that I deserve to be abused by Paul…\n\nShe kneads her forehead again after I say that. “Well, I don’t know what else to say or recommend. You’re making this rather difficult, and I wish you would just tell me what is going on. Betty set up this meeting between us because she was worried, and I don’t want to walk away from this without getting to the root of this issue, but I’m at my wit’s end trying to find a way.”\n\nI stay silent for a moment before I look up at her and say rather nonchalantly, though in a pretty monotone voice, “Can we finish this up? I have homework to do.”\n\nShe sighs but nods. “All right. I don’t want you failing finals or anything like that. If anything, I’m just glad your grades have improved since we last spoke. That had me really worried, too.” Finals… Right… I can’t believe it’s already that time of the year. “By the way… I meant to ask you this last time, but where did that collar come from? You’ve never been the type for jewelry.” Heh, of course she thinks this is that kind of collar…\n\n“Oh, it’s just… Just something I thought would look good on me,” I respond, not wanting to bring up Jackie, even though just the thought of him is making my mental state worse. I miss him so much…\n\nThe German Shepherd smiles at me. “Well, it looks good on you. I’m glad you’re wearing something unique.” Well, the purple does pop on me compared to the rather neutral colors I tend to wear when I’m not trying to look sexy… “I’ll see you later, and I really hope you’ll tell me what’s on your mind next time.”\n\nI’m tempted to tell her not to count on it, but I just nod, and she walks out of my room, looking slightly defeated. I’m glad she’s gone… I don’t know how much longer I could’ve kept that façade up, to be honest. I find myself whining softly as I let myself fall facefirst onto my bed, and I start crying for the millionth time this week. I kept telling myself it would only get easier, but it’s only gotten far more difficult since everything fell apart.\n\nPaul uses me pretty much every chance he gets, and while that’s luckily not every day, Betty is letting him take care of us more often while she gets extra hours at work to help pay for some extra things, of which barely any end up being mine, so he quietly fucks me or pisses in me or whatever he wants, sometimes even while Ivan is in the next room over. I have to be extra careful when that happens… Who knows? My asshole of a brother would probably want to join in the fucking party if he found out, and I don’t think Paul would want to risk the opposite. It’s better not to make Paul angry, so I just stay quiet for the most part when he has his way with me.\n\nOf course, there’s some fucked-up part of me that’s starting to like it. A small part of me that is even fucking craving it. I still find time to have sex with other people, but considering he’s my main source of cock nowadays, I sometimes find myself wanting him inside me even though I’m utterly repulsed by him as a person. If he weren’t such a horrible dick to me, maybe I’d even be attracted to him, but I’m not usually, and I don’t know how there can be a part of me that fucking [i]wants[/i] him to use me like a bitch.\n\nI’ve heard of this before, though. Stockholm syndrome. It’s weird knowing that you’re slowly going crazy and that there’s nothing you can do about it… It’s probably only a matter of time before I’m just an obedient little pup for Paul, doing whatever he wants while he continues to act like he’s a functioning member of our ‘family’, though I really hesitate to use that word for the dynamic we all have.\n\nI just want Jackie back… I want him back so bad… But I don’t know if I’ll get to see him again for a long time… At this point, I’ve given up hope that I’ll ever see him again… Even if I do, who knows if things will ever be the same, but I want my dragon…\n\nMy mind finds its way to the memory of my last interaction with Jackie, and I want to stop myself from reliving it. I want to stop myself from feeling these emotions again, but it just goes on, anyway, with no way for me to stop it.\n\n[center]~[/center]\n\nIt was a few days after I had tried to tell Betty about what Paul was doing to me. A few days after my fucking failure… I already hadn’t seen Jackie since he left with Betty to go talk to his mom about all this. I kind of expected not to hear from him for that long, but I expected him to miraculously be there for me after that. But he wasn’t. Instead, I got a call from him at about midnight, when I was sulking in my special spot in the park.\n\nFrantically and a bit excited, I answered the phone. “Jackie! You’re okay! You’re actually okay!”\n\nI heard him sigh, and he sounded extremely dejected, far from his normal, slightly happy cadence. “W-well, okay might be a… a bit m-much, honestly…” His stutter was there, and there was a bit of a long pause. I couldn’t figure out what else to say, but I was so glad to hear his voice. After a few seconds of no response from me, he began speaking again. “Rory, this… This is really h… h-hard for me to say, but… This m-m-might be the last time I-I talk to you. I don’t kn-know for how long. Frankly, it might be for… f-forever…”\n\n“W-what do you mean?” I stuttered out, whining very audibly.\n\nIt was at this point that I realized he was talking in hushed tones. He must have not been able to get out of his house to talk to me or something… “Th-that recording was pretty d-damning, especially with your previous… previous s-s-sexual encounters being considered. There’s no way I-I wouldn’t have been talking about something sexual, and both B-Betty and my mom know that. And my mom… Well, she’s not… not happy w-with me…”\n\nI chuckled a bit in disbelief, not wanting to think that things could get worse, even though I knew they could. Hoping things were just going to be okay, I said, “So she’s not happy with you… Betty’s never happy with me, and I survive. I’m sure your mom can’t hold a grudge about this stuff like Betty can.”\n\n“It’s worse than that,” he said in reply. “Far, far worse. I… I have to m-move, puppy.” No. No, he couldn’t… “The fact that I have to is t-tearing me up o-o-on the inside, but… I c-can’t refuse. I’m not b-being given a choice… My m-mom is already making arrangements for me t-t-to… to spend the rest of the s-school year, and p-possibly the whole s-s-summer, with my g-grandparents in buttfuck-nowhere M-Mon… Montana…” Montana…? And here we were in Alaska…\n\n“I don’t kn-know if I can handle that…” he continued. “I’m getting a brand-new n-number, and B-Betty says she’ll be ch-ch-changing yours… We won’t be able to get in contact any way other than online, a-a-and they s-said they don’t w-want to see us doing that… I don’t know how well I’ll deal with that. M-months ago, I would’ve given anything to l-leave this place, but now… F-fuck, now I don’t want to leave you, Rory!”\n\nHe was on the verge of tears, and I could hear it, and my ear opposite my phone lowered in empathy and from my own feelings on the matter. “Fuck…” I responded very simply. “When are you moving…?”\n\nI heard him sniffle on the other end. He was definitely crying now… “W-within the next few d-d-days… M-my mom says this isn’t supposed to be a p-punishment, but that… we just need t-t-to ‘put some d-dis… distance between us’ so we d-don’t ‘l-lapse into our… previous b-b-behaviors’… I… I don’t want to do that! I don’t want to be apart from you! I love you, Rory! I fucking love you… and now w-we’re gonna be torn apart…”\n\n“W-well…” I stuttered out, trying to think of ways around this. “How would they really know if we talked online?”\n\nJackie sighed as I said that. “I th-thought of that, too, a-and I asked a-a-about the internet d-down there… Th-they don’t have wifi, and they only h-have one computer… I-I’m only to use it for schoolwork… N-nothing else… And I’m n-not getting that smartphone my mom said I would get, so… th-that wouldn’t be an option, e-either…”\n\nI groan and whine as he says that. “This isn’t good… Your mom seems to be getting really strict all of a sudden… Like, I would’ve thought she’d be more understanding after hearing your side of the story.”\n\n“L-Like I said, she doesn’t consider this a punishment, b-but to be frank, I don’t kn-know what else this could be…” He paused for a second before continuing. “Though… Sh-she is kinda on the religious s-side… This could be from that… I mean… this was her f-first time finding out m-my… my attraction to g-guys… and to have it a-associated with… W-well, let’s call it what it is… p-pedophilia…” I don’t like \n\nHe didn’t finish his sentence, but I knew what he was implying. “Wait… is she trying to get your grandparents to somehow make you straight?”\n\n“M-maybe… but I-I don’t think she’d admit it o-outright, even to herself… She p-p-probably thinks this is what’s best for me and th-that she’s not trying to ch-change me, and I kinda c-can’t fault her for that…” That was fair… His mom wasn’t the type to do something she knew would hurt her son. “B-but… I gotta do this… I d-don’t have a choice… a-a-and I gotta get off the phone b-b-be… before my mom w-wakes up from me b-b-being too loud… ’c-cause I’m gonna have a f-fu… fucking… fucking breakdown if I k-k-keep talking… I-I’m gonna get loud… a-and I can’t afford to g-get in trouble right now…”\n\nAfter he said that, I took a deep, shaky breath, knowing he was right. If things were ever going to get back to normal, he needed to be on his best behavior, and I needed to be on mine. “All right…” I said dejectedly.\n\nHe took a similarly deep breath. “Just remember… I-I’m gonna be here with you i-in your heart. I know… I know that s-s-sounds cheesy, but… I m-mean it. And d-don’t be afraid to s-stand up to P-P-Paul. Even if it t-takes you months to do it. I don’t w-want to see you worse off w-when I get back. Please… just try to stand up t-to him…”\n\nI nodded, even though he couldn’t see me. “I’ll try…”\n\n“Okay. That’s all I-I can ask. I love you, Rory. So much.”\n\n“I love you, too, Jackie.”\n\n“W-well… Goodbye…”\n\n“Y-yeah…”\n\nWith that, the line went dead, and I just sat on the bench, feeling similarly dead to the phone line. I got off the bench and found a patch of grass nearby, lying down on it and curling up, crying hard as I thought about the fact that this was the last conversation I’d have with him for a while…\n\n[center]~[/center]\n\nI can hear the front door open and close. I know exactly who it is from the force used to shut the front door. It’s Paul, and he’s going to have his way with me again. Well, not if I can help it… Thinking about that conversation with Jackie has reminded me what he wanted me to do. He wanted me to stand up to him, and I’ll be damned if I don’t at least try.\n\nI hear him coming up the stairs. His footsteps aren’t nearly as heavy when he’s not drunk, but they’re still far more audible than whenever Betty or Ivan come up the stairs. If I’m really lucky, he’ll only be going to his and Betty’s room, and I won’t have to deal with him yet, but I know I’m not that lucky. Sure enough, he opens my door without knocking, and I sigh and stand up as he does.\n\n“Hey, whore,” says the wolf with a grin as he shuts my door right behind him. “Is your ass ready for another pounding? I sure could use it. Had a shitty day at work, and your slutty tailhole is gonna be just the right medicine.” When he sees I’m not taking off my clothes, he frowns at me. “Come on. You know the drill. Clothes off, slut.”\n\nI take a few shaky breaths before I shake my head and look him right in the eye. “No.”\n\nAfter I say that, he growls loudly at me and takes a few steps toward me. “What the fuck did you just say?!”\n\n“N-no! I won’t just let you keep using me!” I narrow my red eyes and glare at him, shaking the whole time out of fear. My stomach has felt like it’s repeatedly dropping, and my fur has been standing on end since he got in here. My entire mind is telling me to stop and let him do whatever the fuck he wants, but I can’t. Not if I want to ever have any peace of mind. \n\nHe shakes his head at me. “Oh, you think you’re so tough now, huh?” And with that, I feel his fist collide with the side of my face, and I fall to the ground, hitting the back of my head on the side of my desk as I do, tears spilling out of my eyes from the sharp pain in both my face and head. “Don’t you [i]ever[/i] speak to me like that again, bitch! You are mine, and I don’t care what you think in that stupid head of yours! Those brain cells are better used for thinking of ways to pleasure me than how to talk back to me!”\n\nI curl up on the floor, unable to think about much else than the throbbing pain in my head as tears stream down my face while I sob uncontrollably. While I’m down, he kicks me straight in the balls, making me yelp out like a dying animal and squirm around, my mind unable to figure out which pain to focus on. “So… are you going to make me hurt you even more, or are you going to just let me have my way? I’ll be fucking you either way, but whether I do so after or before putting you in more pain depends on your goddamn answer.”\n\nIf I don’t resist him… he’ll just keep using me… I gotta stand up for myself… Gotta show him that I won’t bend to his will… I slowly use my shaky paws to lift myself off the ground and try to stand up. “Fuck you,” I mutter as I try to stand up, through the tears I’m shedding.\n\nPaul sighs and shakes his head again before he kicks me in the stomach before I can stand all the way up, making me drop straight to the floor and onto my belly. He rams his footpaw into my side several times, and I yelp each time, my tears wetting the carpet beneath me. It can’t get any worse than this… He’ll stop before hurting me too badly again… He wouldn’t want another hospital incident…\n\n“You’ll never be more than my plaything,” he says before he drives the claws of his footpaw right into my side, and fucking hell… That hurts just as much as his teeth, and I scream out again in complete and utter agony. Goddamn… I can feel my blood spilling out and soaking my shirt a bit. For several excruciating seconds, he keeps his claws inside me, speaking the whole time. “You. Are. My. Fucktoy. You got that?” He pauses for a moment. “I’m not taking them out till I get a response of some kind. You are mine. Is that clear?”\n\nI whimper loudly and start nodding rapidly. “Yes! Yes! I’m your fucktoy! I’m your plaything! I’m yours!”\n\nAfter enough whimpering and whining from me, he decides that’s enough, and he pulls his claws out of me before snapping his fingers and pointing to my bed. “Now take those damn clothes off and get your ass up there. I’m going to fuck you hard, and you’re not going to struggle one bit.”\n\nI nod and struggle a few seconds to get off the ground, and once I’m finally on my footpaws, I pull off my shorts, underwear, and blood-soaked shirt. Blood is still trickling out of my side, but it’s not enough to make me bleed out, so I doubt Paul cares at all. I get on my bed and on all fours, lifting my tail. I can hear him unzip his pants, but he doesn’t do anything else. After all, why get naked with a slut when all you plan to do is fuck him.\n\nHe gets on the bed behind me and slams his shaft right into me, moaning as he does. He hasn’t done me in a few days, so I’m a bit tight. I can feel everything more than usual, and in a way… I can’t help but focus on the good parts of this. His six-inch cock is pretty decent, even if it isn’t Jackie’s ten-inch monster. Having at least something up my hole feels pretty damn good after being beaten like that… It almost feels like a reward, and that’s how my body is starting to respond to it, my own member hardening. It’s done that several times before recently, too…\n\nAs Paul keeps burying his bone in me, He leans down and bites down on my shoulder, right where he bit me a few months ago, but he doesn’t bite down that hard again, likely not wanting to make another mess of blood… His teeth are almost right on the scars from before, and he knows it. He can feel me squirm, and I can feel his mouth twist into a bit of a smirk.\n\nHe pulls off my shoulder and whispers in my ear. “I can still see each individual tooth here. That’s not gonna fade for years, and for those years, it’s going to show that you’re mine.” He keeps saying that I’m his, trying to drive home that point over and over. I keep telling myself every time he says it that I should just accept it… and after this, I’m pretty convinced I should… Maybe Jackie was wrong this time… Maybe I’ll never get out from under Paul’s thumb…\n\n“You’re right…” I whimper out, my cock even twitching more as I admit this. “I’m yours… I’m your bitch… So just use me… Use me when you want and how you want…”\n\n“Finally!” he shouts out, starting to pound me pretty damn hard, but I find myself moaning out as he actually focuses on my prostate for once. Seems he’s known where it is this entire time and has just refused to stimulate it more than he has to. “And for submitting, you get a reward. You get to cum thanks to my cock instead of just finding some poor other soul to get you off.”\n\nThe pleasure from finally having my prostate pounded by him is making me whimper in pleasure into my pillow, almost completely forgetting about the pain in my side and how he’s treated me. All I want now is to serve him so I can get off for once, and maybe… Maybe I can just bring myself to be completely subservient to him, and then I won’t have to worry about trying to resist him. \n\nI begin leaking a little pre onto the bed as he starts fucking me at a nearly feral pace, slamming into my sweet spot with every thrust. “You’re being such a good whore for me! I’ve never heard you moan like this, and I fucking love hearing you nearly beg for my cock with those noises. Mmmfff, I could get used to this!”\n\n“Y-yes, sir!” I very nearly squeak out. “Use your fox slut!” I can’t believe I’m talking like this… What have I turned into…?\n\nWith a few more thrusts from him, I can feel myself go right over the edge, squirting cum all over my bed. It’s quite a lot, too, as I haven’t actually gotten myself off in weeks. I hear Paul chuckle as he likely feels my hole squeeze his shaft while I whine in pleasure, and it’s not long before he rams his knot right into me, pumping me full of his seed, too. With how often he gets off, it’s not nearly as much as mine, but damn, it feels great flowing into me… Why have I never focused on the good of this? It makes it so much easier…\n\nAfter he finishes cumming inside me, he yanks his knot right out of me. “Such an obedient little boy today,” he says as I collapse onto my belly, panting as I lie in my own semen and blood. “I think you deserve at least a little help.” I hear him leave my room, but he doesn’t close the door, and I slowly roll over onto my back. After about a minute, he comes back into the room with a large pad of gauze, a roll of bandages, and a tube of antibacterial cream. “Patch yourself up and get those sheets in the laundry. Figured I’d at least give you a chance to treat that wound. Can’t have a repeat of last time.”\n\nHe tosses the items onto the bed next to me and walks away, shutting my door. It’s pathetic, but I can’t help but think about how much kinder that was than what he did the last time he hurt me this badly…\n\n[center]~[/center]\n\nIf someone had told me even weeks ago that I’d be submitting to that asshole, I would’ve called them crazy. Delusional. But now… Now I’m lying here, hours later, waiting for my laundry to finish, thinking about him. Thinking about his cock inside me. I’ve always had an insatiable need for sex, and he’s using that against me. I know he is. I know what he’s doing to me, but I can’t help it. He’s breaking me.\n\nI had a good run. I really did. I spent years as basically the town slut, loving every time I got to go at it, and when Jackie came along, I had the opportunity to be the little pup to someone I legitimately love. Now… now it’s my time to be Paul’s bitch. He’ll abuse me for years, and I’ve slowly become okay with that. I’ve been somewhat looking forward to the sex for weeks now, and now the abuse doesn’t even scare me. Standing up to him scares me more now. That was his plan, too. Make me more scared of what he’ll do to me if I resist than if I don’t.\n\nIt worked. All of this worked, and it was all part of his plan. From hurting me the first time to making Jackie have to leave. He knew Jackie would suffer consequences if things got out about us, and he knew I’d become spineless without him. In a way, I have to admire just how calculating he is. He just wants to maximize his own pleasure, and the best way for him to do that is to get me to obey him unquestioningly.\n\nAs I lie here, I hear the door open, and for a moment, I think it’s just Paul, but I remember that he’d never do anything to me while Betty’s home. I sit up a bit and look over at the door, and in the frame of the door is my older brother, and I can see that his face is a little red under his white fur. Mostly, though, he looks a mix of surprised and worried, though I can’t figure out why he would look the latter. I sigh and roll my eyes, looking straight at him. “Fucking hell, Ivan, it’s not like you’ve never seen me naked before.”\n\nHe shakes his head and looks down at where I first assume is my crotch. “No, man, that’s not what I’m staring at. What the hell happened to you?” Oh. He sees the gauze and bandages. And probably the bruises on my face and stomach. Well, to be fair, they’d be hard to miss, especially since I am buck-ass naked.\n\n“It’s nothing,” I say with a frown as I lie back down, breaking eye contact. “As if you’d care, anyway. Just leave me alone.”\n\nI hear him shut the door before he starts talking again. “Stop. I came in here to—”\n\n“To what?” I ask rather angrily, sitting up and glaring at him, growling a bit. “To make fun of the slut?! To add insult to injury by poking fun at how I’m hurt?! Fuck that! Just leave, for fuck’s sake!”\n\n“Could you just listen to me without interrupting?!” he shouts in a similarly irritated tone, and I think that’s the first time he’s basically asked me to do something instead of just commanding me. “God, you’re making it really difficult to apologize!” After he said that last word, I was stunned. I couldn’t find the words to even respond to him, and I’m sure I looked like a deer in headlights, or I guess a fox in headlights. \n\n“Yeah, I know,” he continued, not waiting for me to respond, I suppose taking that as a response. “It’s not something I expected to do, either, but…” He sighed between his thoughts. “I don’t know… I guess I just… did some soul searching. I’ve been… shitty to you. Really shitty. Mom dying on her way to pick you up… made me blame you for what happened, and I didn’t realize that your… sexual tendencies… were a result of what Vincent did to you…” I haven’t heard the name of our old foster father in forever…\n\nHe takes a deep breath and locks his blue eyes with my red ones. “So I’m gonna ask you… what in the world happened? First a ‘dog bite’, and now whatever this is? It’s kinda pathetic that I don’t know you too well even though I’m your brother, but I know you well enough to know that you aren’t the type to get physically hurt and not tell anyone. You look like you got into a fight, and you wouldn’t do that.”\n\nI look away from him and just shake my head. “Look, you should stay out of this. That was a nice show you put on there, but it’d be a miracle if you actually cared.”\n\nHe growls and punches the doorframe, and I can see that he definitely hurt himself more than he damaged said doorframe, but he speaks again, anyway. “I’m [i]trying[/i] to care, but you’re not making that any easier! I’ve spent most of my life despising you because you’re way more unique than I am and, frankly, because you’ve gotten laid far more than I ever will! I want to be done hating my little brother! Let me care, dammit!”\n\nHe’s panting despite the fact that he hasn’t really physically exerted himself other than punching the wall. Maybe he does want to care… and if that’s the case, I definitely can’t tell him. Paul will just hurt him, too, and find some way to get him out of the picture. “It was nothing…” I say under my breath, lying back down and curling up.\n\nHe just sighs and shakes his head. “You’re still too stubborn to let anyone in to help you… I’m already tired of trying tonight. You can come to me, even if I may not have been the best in the past.” I expect him to just leave, but as he opens the door, he turns and looks at me again. “Good night, Rory,” he says before he walks out and closes the door.\n\nI can’t even begin to comprehend why he changed his mind on me… but it’s making me all emotional again, and I start crying yet again.\n\nEven with the support of people like Ivan and Jackie, though… things won’t change. I’ll be in this despair for a while longer yet, until Paul decides he’s done with me as his plaything, and who knows when that will be?","writing_bbcode_parsed":"“Rory, there’s only so much I can do for you if you won’t tell me what’s wrong.”
I look up at the German Shepherd in front of me with a deadpan expression, obviously not amused. “What is there to tell? Like I said, I’m just going through a phase of depression… It should eventually clear up, and I’ll be fine.”
The female canine who is my social worker sighs and kneads her forehead before shaking her head. “There’s no such thing as a ‘phase of depression’. If you’re depressed, that’s something that needs to be taken care of. You need help, but I can only help you if you start telling me what’s bothering you. Betty and I could find you a counselor to go see, and—”
Past caring at this point, I interrupt her. “Yeah, find me a counselor. And tell them about all my ‘escapades’, as you and Betty call them, and I’m sure they would just love to help me out instead of trying to ‘fix’ me like everyone else tries. Like you tried. And like Betty tries.”
I’m sure she can hear the sarcasm dripping from my voice, as she just shakes her head again. “Not everyone is the enemy, Rory. I just wish I could get you to actually see that… Betty says she sees that you and Paul seem to be on better terms now. Maybe you could confide in him instead and at least get some of this out of your system and calm your nerves a bit.”
As she even mentions his name, my fur stands on end, and I get that same feeling in my stomach that I do when he’s near, but it’s not nearly as pronounced. “No, I’m fine. I don’t need to tell Paul anything. Besides, I’m pretty sure he already knows how messed up I am and the reasons why without me having to tell him.”
I can’t tell her that he’s the reason I’m messed up right now. I know what he’d do to me. They’d have to launch an investigation, and I’m very sure that they wouldn’t find any actual evidence of misconduct with me. The dude is weirdly squeaky clean when it comes to his record, too, so they probably would assume he wouldn’t commit a crime like child rape. And then when all that was done… Oh, he’d be mad. So mad… And I’d feel most of the fallout from it, whether physically, sexually, or verbally…
I think she can see my visceral reaction to Paul being brought up, but she doesn’t mention anything further about him. “Okay, well… What about Ivan? I know you two have had your differences in the past, but he’s told me even he’s concerned about you. He says it ‘throws him off’ to see you like this.”
I almost snort in laughter at her suggestion. “Pfft, Ivan? As if… He’d just make fun of me if he found out I’m dealing with depression. Simple as that. He’s way meaner than you give him credit for. Both you and Betty treat him like an angel, but he’d never care about me.” My brother is the last person I’d want to talk to about this. He wouldn’t care. He would laugh and tell me that I deserve to be abused by Paul…
She kneads her forehead again after I say that. “Well, I don’t know what else to say or recommend. You’re making this rather difficult, and I wish you would just tell me what is going on. Betty set up this meeting between us because she was worried, and I don’t want to walk away from this without getting to the root of this issue, but I’m at my wit’s end trying to find a way.”
I stay silent for a moment before I look up at her and say rather nonchalantly, though in a pretty monotone voice, “Can we finish this up? I have homework to do.”
She sighs but nods. “All right. I don’t want you failing finals or anything like that. If anything, I’m just glad your grades have improved since we last spoke. That had me really worried, too.” Finals… Right… I can’t believe it’s already that time of the year. “By the way… I meant to ask you this last time, but where did that collar come from? You’ve never been the type for jewelry.” Heh, of course she thinks this is that kind of collar…
“Oh, it’s just… Just something I thought would look good on me,” I respond, not wanting to bring up Jackie, even though just the thought of him is making my mental state worse. I miss him so much…
The German Shepherd smiles at me. “Well, it looks good on you. I’m glad you’re wearing something unique.” Well, the purple does pop on me compared to the rather neutral colors I tend to wear when I’m not trying to look sexy… “I’ll see you later, and I really hope you’ll tell me what’s on your mind next time.”
I’m tempted to tell her not to count on it, but I just nod, and she walks out of my room, looking slightly defeated. I’m glad she’s gone… I don’t know how much longer I could’ve kept that façade up, to be honest. I find myself whining softly as I let myself fall facefirst onto my bed, and I start crying for the millionth time this week. I kept telling myself it would only get easier, but it’s only gotten far more difficult since everything fell apart.
Paul uses me pretty much every chance he gets, and while that’s luckily not every day, Betty is letting him take care of us more often while she gets extra hours at work to help pay for some extra things, of which barely any end up being mine, so he quietly fucks me or pisses in me or whatever he wants, sometimes even while Ivan is in the next room over. I have to be extra careful when that happens… Who knows? My asshole of a brother would probably want to join in the fucking party if he found out, and I don’t think Paul would want to risk the opposite. It’s better not to make Paul angry, so I just stay quiet for the most part when he has his way with me.
Of course, there’s some fucked-up part of me that’s starting to like it. A small part of me that is even fucking craving it. I still find time to have sex with other people, but considering he’s my main source of cock nowadays, I sometimes find myself wanting him inside me even though I’m utterly repulsed by him as a person. If he weren’t such a horrible dick to me, maybe I’d even be attracted to him, but I’m not usually, and I don’t know how there can be a part of me that fucking wants him to use me like a bitch.
I’ve heard of this before, though. Stockholm syndrome. It’s weird knowing that you’re slowly going crazy and that there’s nothing you can do about it… It’s probably only a matter of time before I’m just an obedient little pup for Paul, doing whatever he wants while he continues to act like he’s a functioning member of our ‘family’, though I really hesitate to use that word for the dynamic we all have.
I just want Jackie back… I want him back so bad… But I don’t know if I’ll get to see him again for a long time… At this point, I’ve given up hope that I’ll ever see him again… Even if I do, who knows if things will ever be the same, but I want my dragon…
My mind finds its way to the memory of my last interaction with Jackie, and I want to stop myself from reliving it. I want to stop myself from feeling these emotions again, but it just goes on, anyway, with no way for me to stop it.
~
It was a few days after I had tried to tell Betty about what Paul was doing to me. A few days after my fucking failure… I already hadn’t seen Jackie since he left with Betty to go talk to his mom about all this. I kind of expected not to hear from him for that long, but I expected him to miraculously be there for me after that. But he wasn’t. Instead, I got a call from him at about midnight, when I was sulking in my special spot in the park.
Frantically and a bit excited, I answered the phone. “Jackie! You’re okay! You’re actually okay!”
I heard him sigh, and he sounded extremely dejected, far from his normal, slightly happy cadence. “W-well, okay might be a… a bit m-much, honestly…” His stutter was there, and there was a bit of a long pause. I couldn’t figure out what else to say, but I was so glad to hear his voice. After a few seconds of no response from me, he began speaking again. “Rory, this… This is really h… h-hard for me to say, but… This m-m-might be the last time I-I talk to you. I don’t kn-know for how long. Frankly, it might be for… f-forever…”
“W-what do you mean?” I stuttered out, whining very audibly.
It was at this point that I realized he was talking in hushed tones. He must have not been able to get out of his house to talk to me or something… “Th-that recording was pretty d-damning, especially with your previous… previous s-s-sexual encounters being considered. There’s no way I-I wouldn’t have been talking about something sexual, and both B-Betty and my mom know that. And my mom… Well, she’s not… not happy w-with me…”
I chuckled a bit in disbelief, not wanting to think that things could get worse, even though I knew they could. Hoping things were just going to be okay, I said, “So she’s not happy with you… Betty’s never happy with me, and I survive. I’m sure your mom can’t hold a grudge about this stuff like Betty can.”
“It’s worse than that,” he said in reply. “Far, far worse. I… I have to m-move, puppy.” No. No, he couldn’t… “The fact that I have to is t-tearing me up o-o-on the inside, but… I c-can’t refuse. I’m not b-being given a choice… My m-mom is already making arrangements for me t-t-to… to spend the rest of the s-school year, and p-possibly the whole s-s-summer, with my g-grandparents in buttfuck-nowhere M-Mon… Montana…” Montana…? And here we were in Alaska…
“I don’t kn-know if I can handle that…” he continued. “I’m getting a brand-new n-number, and B-Betty says she’ll be ch-ch-changing yours… We won’t be able to get in contact any way other than online, a-a-and they s-said they don’t w-want to see us doing that… I don’t know how well I’ll deal with that. M-months ago, I would’ve given anything to l-leave this place, but now… F-fuck, now I don’t want to leave you, Rory!”
He was on the verge of tears, and I could hear it, and my ear opposite my phone lowered in empathy and from my own feelings on the matter. “Fuck…” I responded very simply. “When are you moving…?”
I heard him sniffle on the other end. He was definitely crying now… “W-within the next few d-d-days… M-my mom says this isn’t supposed to be a p-punishment, but that… we just need t-t-to ‘put some d-dis… distance between us’ so we d-don’t ‘l-lapse into our… previous b-b-behaviors’… I… I don’t want to do that! I don’t want to be apart from you! I love you, Rory! I fucking love you… and now w-we’re gonna be torn apart…”
“W-well…” I stuttered out, trying to think of ways around this. “How would they really know if we talked online?”
Jackie sighed as I said that. “I th-thought of that, too, a-and I asked a-a-about the internet d-down there… Th-they don’t have wifi, and they only h-have one computer… I-I’m only to use it for schoolwork… N-nothing else… And I’m n-not getting that smartphone my mom said I would get, so… th-that wouldn’t be an option, e-either…”
I groan and whine as he says that. “This isn’t good… Your mom seems to be getting really strict all of a sudden… Like, I would’ve thought she’d be more understanding after hearing your side of the story.”
“L-Like I said, she doesn’t consider this a punishment, b-but to be frank, I don’t kn-know what else this could be…” He paused for a second before continuing. “Though… Sh-she is kinda on the religious s-side… This could be from that… I mean… this was her f-first time finding out m-my… my attraction to g-guys… and to have it a-associated with… W-well, let’s call it what it is… p-pedophilia…” I don’t like
He didn’t finish his sentence, but I knew what he was implying. “Wait… is she trying to get your grandparents to somehow make you straight?”
“M-maybe… but I-I don’t think she’d admit it o-outright, even to herself… She p-p-probably thinks this is what’s best for me and th-that she’s not trying to ch-change me, and I kinda c-can’t fault her for that…” That was fair… His mom wasn’t the type to do something she knew would hurt her son. “B-but… I gotta do this… I d-don’t have a choice… a-a-and I gotta get off the phone b-b-be… before my mom w-wakes up from me b-b-being too loud… ’c-cause I’m gonna have a f-fu… fucking… fucking breakdown if I k-k-keep talking… I-I’m gonna get loud… a-and I can’t afford to g-get in trouble right now…”
After he said that, I took a deep, shaky breath, knowing he was right. If things were ever going to get back to normal, he needed to be on his best behavior, and I needed to be on mine. “All right…” I said dejectedly.
He took a similarly deep breath. “Just remember… I-I’m gonna be here with you i-in your heart. I know… I know that s-s-sounds cheesy, but… I m-mean it. And d-don’t be afraid to s-stand up to P-P-Paul. Even if it t-takes you months to do it. I don’t w-want to see you worse off w-when I get back. Please… just try to stand up t-to him…”
I nodded, even though he couldn’t see me. “I’ll try…”
“Okay. That’s all I-I can ask. I love you, Rory. So much.”
“I love you, too, Jackie.”
“W-well… Goodbye…”
“Y-yeah…”
With that, the line went dead, and I just sat on the bench, feeling similarly dead to the phone line. I got off the bench and found a patch of grass nearby, lying down on it and curling up, crying hard as I thought about the fact that this was the last conversation I’d have with him for a while…
~
I can hear the front door open and close. I know exactly who it is from the force used to shut the front door. It’s Paul, and he’s going to have his way with me again. Well, not if I can help it… Thinking about that conversation with Jackie has reminded me what he wanted me to do. He wanted me to stand up to him, and I’ll be damned if I don’t at least try.
I hear him coming up the stairs. His footsteps aren’t nearly as heavy when he’s not drunk, but they’re still far more audible than whenever Betty or Ivan come up the stairs. If I’m really lucky, he’ll only be going to his and Betty’s room, and I won’t have to deal with him yet, but I know I’m not that lucky. Sure enough, he opens my door without knocking, and I sigh and stand up as he does.
“Hey, whore,” says the wolf with a grin as he shuts my door right behind him. “Is your ass ready for another pounding? I sure could use it. Had a shitty day at work, and your slutty tailhole is gonna be just the right medicine.” When he sees I’m not taking off my clothes, he frowns at me. “Come on. You know the drill. Clothes off, slut.”
I take a few shaky breaths before I shake my head and look him right in the eye. “No.”
After I say that, he growls loudly at me and takes a few steps toward me. “What the fuck did you just say?!”
“N-no! I won’t just let you keep using me!” I narrow my red eyes and glare at him, shaking the whole time out of fear. My stomach has felt like it’s repeatedly dropping, and my fur has been standing on end since he got in here. My entire mind is telling me to stop and let him do whatever the fuck he wants, but I can’t. Not if I want to ever have any peace of mind.
He shakes his head at me. “Oh, you think you’re so tough now, huh?” And with that, I feel his fist collide with the side of my face, and I fall to the ground, hitting the back of my head on the side of my desk as I do, tears spilling out of my eyes from the sharp pain in both my face and head. “Don’t you ever speak to me like that again, bitch! You are mine, and I don’t care what you think in that stupid head of yours! Those brain cells are better used for thinking of ways to pleasure me than how to talk back to me!”
I curl up on the floor, unable to think about much else than the throbbing pain in my head as tears stream down my face while I sob uncontrollably. While I’m down, he kicks me straight in the balls, making me yelp out like a dying animal and squirm around, my mind unable to figure out which pain to focus on. “So… are you going to make me hurt you even more, or are you going to just let me have my way? I’ll be fucking you either way, but whether I do so after or before putting you in more pain depends on your goddamn answer.”
If I don’t resist him… he’ll just keep using me… I gotta stand up for myself… Gotta show him that I won’t bend to his will… I slowly use my shaky paws to lift myself off the ground and try to stand up. “Fuck you,” I mutter as I try to stand up, through the tears I’m shedding.
Paul sighs and shakes his head again before he kicks me in the stomach before I can stand all the way up, making me drop straight to the floor and onto my belly. He rams his footpaw into my side several times, and I yelp each time, my tears wetting the carpet beneath me. It can’t get any worse than this… He’ll stop before hurting me too badly again… He wouldn’t want another hospital incident…
“You’ll never be more than my plaything,” he says before he drives the claws of his footpaw right into my side, and fucking hell… That hurts just as much as his teeth, and I scream out again in complete and utter agony. Goddamn… I can feel my blood spilling out and soaking my shirt a bit. For several excruciating seconds, he keeps his claws inside me, speaking the whole time. “You. Are. My. Fucktoy. You got that?” He pauses for a moment. “I’m not taking them out till I get a response of some kind. You are mine. Is that clear?”
I whimper loudly and start nodding rapidly. “Yes! Yes! I’m your fucktoy! I’m your plaything! I’m yours!”
After enough whimpering and whining from me, he decides that’s enough, and he pulls his claws out of me before snapping his fingers and pointing to my bed. “Now take those damn clothes off and get your ass up there. I’m going to fuck you hard, and you’re not going to struggle one bit.”
I nod and struggle a few seconds to get off the ground, and once I’m finally on my footpaws, I pull off my shorts, underwear, and blood-soaked shirt. Blood is still trickling out of my side, but it’s not enough to make me bleed out, so I doubt Paul cares at all. I get on my bed and on all fours, lifting my tail. I can hear him unzip his pants, but he doesn’t do anything else. After all, why get naked with a slut when all you plan to do is fuck him.
He gets on the bed behind me and slams his shaft right into me, moaning as he does. He hasn’t done me in a few days, so I’m a bit tight. I can feel everything more than usual, and in a way… I can’t help but focus on the good parts of this. His six-inch cock is pretty decent, even if it isn’t Jackie’s ten-inch monster. Having at least something up my hole feels pretty damn good after being beaten like that… It almost feels like a reward, and that’s how my body is starting to respond to it, my own member hardening. It’s done that several times before recently, too…
As Paul keeps burying his bone in me, He leans down and bites down on my shoulder, right where he bit me a few months ago, but he doesn’t bite down that hard again, likely not wanting to make another mess of blood… His teeth are almost right on the scars from before, and he knows it. He can feel me squirm, and I can feel his mouth twist into a bit of a smirk.
He pulls off my shoulder and whispers in my ear. “I can still see each individual tooth here. That’s not gonna fade for years, and for those years, it’s going to show that you’re mine.” He keeps saying that I’m his, trying to drive home that point over and over. I keep telling myself every time he says it that I should just accept it… and after this, I’m pretty convinced I should… Maybe Jackie was wrong this time… Maybe I’ll never get out from under Paul’s thumb…
“You’re right…” I whimper out, my cock even twitching more as I admit this. “I’m yours… I’m your bitch… So just use me… Use me when you want and how you want…”
“Finally!” he shouts out, starting to pound me pretty damn hard, but I find myself moaning out as he actually focuses on my prostate for once. Seems he’s known where it is this entire time and has just refused to stimulate it more than he has to. “And for submitting, you get a reward. You get to cum thanks to my cock instead of just finding some poor other soul to get you off.”
The pleasure from finally having my prostate pounded by him is making me whimper in pleasure into my pillow, almost completely forgetting about the pain in my side and how he’s treated me. All I want now is to serve him so I can get off for once, and maybe… Maybe I can just bring myself to be completely subservient to him, and then I won’t have to worry about trying to resist him.
I begin leaking a little pre onto the bed as he starts fucking me at a nearly feral pace, slamming into my sweet spot with every thrust. “You’re being such a good whore for me! I’ve never heard you moan like this, and I fucking love hearing you nearly beg for my cock with those noises. Mmmfff, I could get used to this!”
“Y-yes, sir!” I very nearly squeak out. “Use your fox slut!” I can’t believe I’m talking like this… What have I turned into…?
With a few more thrusts from him, I can feel myself go right over the edge, squirting cum all over my bed. It’s quite a lot, too, as I haven’t actually gotten myself off in weeks. I hear Paul chuckle as he likely feels my hole squeeze his shaft while I whine in pleasure, and it’s not long before he rams his knot right into me, pumping me full of his seed, too. With how often he gets off, it’s not nearly as much as mine, but damn, it feels great flowing into me… Why have I never focused on the good of this? It makes it so much easier…
After he finishes cumming inside me, he yanks his knot right out of me. “Such an obedient little boy today,” he says as I collapse onto my belly, panting as I lie in my own semen and blood. “I think you deserve at least a little help.” I hear him leave my room, but he doesn’t close the door, and I slowly roll over onto my back. After about a minute, he comes back into the room with a large pad of gauze, a roll of bandages, and a tube of antibacterial cream. “Patch yourself up and get those sheets in the laundry. Figured I’d at least give you a chance to treat that wound. Can’t have a repeat of last time.”
He tosses the items onto the bed next to me and walks away, shutting my door. It’s pathetic, but I can’t help but think about how much kinder that was than what he did the last time he hurt me this badly…
~
If someone had told me even weeks ago that I’d be submitting to that asshole, I would’ve called them crazy. Delusional. But now… Now I’m lying here, hours later, waiting for my laundry to finish, thinking about him. Thinking about his cock inside me. I’ve always had an insatiable need for sex, and he’s using that against me. I know he is. I know what he’s doing to me, but I can’t help it. He’s breaking me.
I had a good run. I really did. I spent years as basically the town slut, loving every time I got to go at it, and when Jackie came along, I had the opportunity to be the little pup to someone I legitimately love. Now… now it’s my time to be Paul’s bitch. He’ll abuse me for years, and I’ve slowly become okay with that. I’ve been somewhat looking forward to the sex for weeks now, and now the abuse doesn’t even scare me. Standing up to him scares me more now. That was his plan, too. Make me more scared of what he’ll do to me if I resist than if I don’t.
It worked. All of this worked, and it was all part of his plan. From hurting me the first time to making Jackie have to leave. He knew Jackie would suffer consequences if things got out about us, and he knew I’d become spineless without him. In a way, I have to admire just how calculating he is. He just wants to maximize his own pleasure, and the best way for him to do that is to get me to obey him unquestioningly.
As I lie here, I hear the door open, and for a moment, I think it’s just Paul, but I remember that he’d never do anything to me while Betty’s home. I sit up a bit and look over at the door, and in the frame of the door is my older brother, and I can see that his face is a little red under his white fur. Mostly, though, he looks a mix of surprised and worried, though I can’t figure out why he would look the latter. I sigh and roll my eyes, looking straight at him. “Fucking hell, Ivan, it’s not like you’ve never seen me naked before.”
He shakes his head and looks down at where I first assume is my crotch. “No, man, that’s not what I’m staring at. What the hell happened to you?” Oh. He sees the gauze and bandages. And probably the bruises on my face and stomach. Well, to be fair, they’d be hard to miss, especially since I am buck-ass naked.
“It’s nothing,” I say with a frown as I lie back down, breaking eye contact. “As if you’d care, anyway. Just leave me alone.”
I hear him shut the door before he starts talking again. “Stop. I came in here to—”
“To what?” I ask rather angrily, sitting up and glaring at him, growling a bit. “To make fun of the slut?! To add insult to injury by poking fun at how I’m hurt?! Fuck that! Just leave, for fuck’s sake!”
“Could you just listen to me without interrupting?!” he shouts in a similarly irritated tone, and I think that’s the first time he’s basically asked me to do something instead of just commanding me. “God, you’re making it really difficult to apologize!” After he said that last word, I was stunned. I couldn’t find the words to even respond to him, and I’m sure I looked like a deer in headlights, or I guess a fox in headlights.
“Yeah, I know,” he continued, not waiting for me to respond, I suppose taking that as a response. “It’s not something I expected to do, either, but…” He sighed between his thoughts. “I don’t know… I guess I just… did some soul searching. I’ve been… shitty to you. Really shitty. Mom dying on her way to pick you up… made me blame you for what happened, and I didn’t realize that your… sexual tendencies… were a result of what Vincent did to you…” I haven’t heard the name of our old foster father in forever…
He takes a deep breath and locks his blue eyes with my red ones. “So I’m gonna ask you… what in the world happened? First a ‘dog bite’, and now whatever this is? It’s kinda pathetic that I don’t know you too well even though I’m your brother, but I know you well enough to know that you aren’t the type to get physically hurt and not tell anyone. You look like you got into a fight, and you wouldn’t do that.”
I look away from him and just shake my head. “Look, you should stay out of this. That was a nice show you put on there, but it’d be a miracle if you actually cared.”
He growls and punches the doorframe, and I can see that he definitely hurt himself more than he damaged said doorframe, but he speaks again, anyway. “I’m trying to care, but you’re not making that any easier! I’ve spent most of my life despising you because you’re way more unique than I am and, frankly, because you’ve gotten laid far more than I ever will! I want to be done hating my little brother! Let me care, dammit!”
He’s panting despite the fact that he hasn’t really physically exerted himself other than punching the wall. Maybe he does want to care… and if that’s the case, I definitely can’t tell him. Paul will just hurt him, too, and find some way to get him out of the picture. “It was nothing…” I say under my breath, lying back down and curling up.
He just sighs and shakes his head. “You’re still too stubborn to let anyone in to help you… I’m already tired of trying tonight. You can come to me, even if I may not have been the best in the past.” I expect him to just leave, but as he opens the door, he turns and looks at me again. “Good night, Rory,” he says before he walks out and closes the door.
I can’t even begin to comprehend why he changed his mind on me… but it’s making me all emotional again, and I start crying yet again.
Even with the support of people like Ivan and Jackie, though… things won’t change. I’ll be in this despair for a while longer yet, until Paul decides he’s done with me as his plaything, and who knows when that will be?","pools_count":3,"title":"A Fox in Despair: The Plaything","deleted":"f","public":"t","mimetype":"application/msword","pagecount":"1","rating_id":"2","rating_name":"Adult","ratings":[{"content_tag_id":"4","name":"Sexual Themes","description":"Erotic imagery, sexual activity or arousal","rating_id":"2"},{"content_tag_id":"5","name":"Strong Violence","description":"Strong violence, blood, serious injury or death","rating_id":"2"}],"submission_type_id":"12","type_name":"Writing - Document","guest_block":"t","friends_only":"f","comments_count":"0","views":"315","sales_description":null,"forsale":"f","digitalsales":"f","printsales":"f","digital_price":""}