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  "description": "[i]\"Perhaps, class, you believe thaumaturgy - what some may call 'black magic' - is only useful in a battle situation,\" the mage began, a subtle grin on his face as his students looked at him with a mixture of bewilderment and awe. \"And it is certainly true that mastery over the prime elements allows one to be a force of destruction on the battlefield. However, far too many thaumaturges ignore the more practical, everyday uses for their magic.\" He paused, taking in with pride the expressions of the class. It was always good to have a student body that paid such apt attention, and he enjoyed seeing how his words sank deep into their young, absorbent minds as water into a sponge. It might also have something to do with his robe being open and exposing his nude form beneath it.\n\n\"As an example, let's take the Thunder spell.\" He muttered a few archaic words under his breath and held his gloved hand out, and a thin streak of violet lightning arced from his fingertips into his penis, dancing about the organ and making it swell up rapidly in response. \"As you can see, it can easily be used for electrical stimulation if you limit its power to harmless amounts, or build up your natural resistance to magical forces.\" The class gaze upon his mighty staff as it dribbled on the floor, surprised at how quickly it reacted to being shocked. \"Similarly you might be able to start a campfire with Fire. Those of you with the gift of conjury may also use Aero to cool yourselves or Stone to create footholds across a stream. All it takes to turn your most basic battle spells into useful tools is a little ingenuity.\"\n\n\"Sir?\" One of the younger members of the class rose his hand, and the sorcerer nodded in acknowledgement. \"What would happen if you cast Blizzard on your penis, like you just did with Thunder? From what I've seen it manifests as shards of ice...\"\n\nA smirk spread across the thaumaturgy instructor's face. \"How do you think I got this Prince Albert in?\" The whole class cringed, the one making the inquiry most of all as he looked down into his own lap.[/i]\n\n\n\nJust some silliness of Onyx in Black Mage cosplay. :P Enjoy it, folks!\n\nOnyx © [iconname]OnyxTanuki[/iconname]\nart © [fa]BGN[/fa]",
  "description_bbcode_parsed": "<span style='word-wrap: break-word;'><em>&quot;Perhaps, class, you believe thaumaturgy - what some may call &#039;black magic&#039; - is only useful in a battle situation,&quot; the mage began, a subtle grin on his face as his students looked at him with a mixture of bewilderment and awe. &quot;And it is certainly true that mastery over the prime elements allows one to be a force of destruction on the battlefield. However, far too many thaumaturges ignore the more practical, everyday uses for their magic.&quot; He paused, taking in with pride the expressions of the class. It was always good to have a student body that paid such apt attention, and he enjoyed seeing how his words sank deep into their young, absorbent minds as water into a sponge. It might also have something to do with his robe being open and exposing his nude form beneath it.<br /><br />&quot;As an example, let&#039;s take the Thunder spell.&quot; He muttered a few archaic words under his breath and held his gloved hand out, and a thin streak of violet lightning arced from his fingertips into his penis, dancing about the organ and making it swell up rapidly in response. &quot;As you can see, it can easily be used for electrical stimulation if you limit its power to harmless amounts, or build up your natural resistance to magical forces.&quot; The class gaze upon his mighty staff as it dribbled on the floor, surprised at how quickly it reacted to being shocked. &quot;Similarly you might be able to start a campfire with Fire. Those of you with the gift of conjury may also use Aero to cool yourselves or Stone to create footholds across a stream. All it takes to turn your most basic battle spells into useful tools is a little ingenuity.&quot;<br /><br />&quot;Sir?&quot; One of the younger members of the class rose his hand, and the sorcerer nodded in acknowledgement. &quot;What would happen if you cast Blizzard on your penis, like you just did with Thunder? From what I&#039;ve seen it manifests as shards of ice...&quot;<br /><br />A smirk spread across the thaumaturgy instructor&#039;s face. &quot;How do you think I got this Prince Albert in?&quot; The whole class cringed, the one making the inquiry most of all as he looked down into his own lap.</em><br /><br /><br /><br />Just some silliness of Onyx in Black Mage cosplay. :P Enjoy it, folks!<br /><br />Onyx &copy; \r\n\t\t\t\t\t<table style='display: inline-block; vertical-align:bottom;'>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<tr>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<td style='vertical-align: middle; border: none;'>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div style='width: 50px; height: 50px; position: relative; margin: 0px auto;'>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<a style='position: relative; border: 0px;' href='https://inkbunny.net/OnyxTanuki'><img class='shadowedimage' style='border: 0px;' src='https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/usericons/small/65/65232_OnyxTanuki_1396995831.vallhund_com-onyxtanuki02-t.gif' width='50' height='50' alt='OnyxTanuki' title='OnyxTanuki' /></a>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t</div>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t</td>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<td style='vertical-align: bottom; font-size: 10pt;'>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span style='position: relative; top: 2px;'><a href='https://inkbunny.net/OnyxTanuki' class='widget_userNameSmall'>OnyxTanuki</a></span>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t</td>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t</tr>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t</table><br />art &copy; <a style='border: none;' title='BGN on Fur Affinity' rel='nofollow' href='https://furaffinity.net/user/BGN'><img style='border: none; vertical-align: bottom; width: 14px; height: 14px;' width='14' height='14' src='https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/images80/contacttypes/internet-furaffinity.png' /></a>\n\t\t\t\t\t<a title='BGN on Fur Affinity' rel='nofollow' href='https://furaffinity.net/user/BGN'>BGN</a></span>",
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  "title": "Practical Thaumaturgy 101 (art by BGN)",
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