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  "description": "First chapter in the new Winter Creek  story line Seven Peaks. We pick up the tale of Mark Jameson in the years after the Once in a Blue Moon series. His life has taken many twists and turns over the last eight years, some good some bad but all shaping him and his life in some way.\n\nWill he finally face his fears and the demons of his past that haunt him?\nIf so can he defeat them and regain the parts of himself that have withered?\nOr will he lose the battle raging within himself falling at last into the chasm of darkness and despaire that threatens to consume him?\n\nOnly time will tell.\n\n[color=#f57900]This is a work of fiction and is meant for entertainment purposes only. All names and characters in it is fictional, a composite drawing from several individuals and from imagination. No reference to any living person is intended or should be inferred. No animals were harmed in its production. Businesses, places, events and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. All art of minors are simulated pictures. All models over 18 years of age. Some actions and activities may be illegal or dangerous and should not be attempted. All products, services, and characters copyrighted to their respective owners. Some content may not be safe/suitable for work or school. Some content and depictions may be illegal to view in some areas. Some content may be illegal to view by those under the legal age of connect.[/color]\n\n[b]Characters[/b]\n© @Cormenthor\nMarke Jameson (Bernese Mountain Dog)\nBob Jameson \nAlice Jameson\nSharleen\nDebbie Conner (American Short Eared Rabbit)\nArnold “Arny” Kielder\nDr. Jamal White \nSam Thomas (saluki)\n",
  "description_bbcode_parsed": "<span style='word-wrap: break-word;'>First chapter in the new Winter Creek&nbsp;&nbsp;story line Seven Peaks. We pick up the tale of Mark Jameson in the years after the Once in a Blue Moon series. His life has taken many twists and turns over the last eight years, some good some bad but all shaping him and his life in some way.<br /><br />Will he finally face his fears and the demons of his past that haunt him?<br />If so can he defeat them and regain the parts of himself that have withered?<br />Or will he lose the battle raging within himself falling at last into the chasm of darkness and despaire that threatens to consume him?<br /><br />Only time will tell.<br /><br /><span style=\"color: #f57900;\">This is a work of fiction and is meant for entertainment purposes only. All names and characters in it is fictional, a composite drawing from several individuals and from imagination. No reference to any living person is intended or should be inferred. No animals were harmed in its production. Businesses, places, events and incidents are either the products of the author&rsquo;s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. All art of minors are simulated pictures. All models over 18 years of age. Some actions and activities may be illegal or dangerous and should not be attempted. All products, services, and characters copyrighted to their respective owners. Some content may not be safe/suitable for work or school. Some content and depictions may be illegal to view in some areas. Some content may be illegal to view by those under the legal age of connect.</span><br /><br /><strong>Characters</strong><br />&copy; \r\n\t\t\t\t\t<table style='display: inline-block; vertical-align:bottom;'>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<tr>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<td style='vertical-align: middle; border: none;'>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div style='width: 50px; height: 50px; position: relative; margin: 0px auto;'>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<a style='position: relative; border: 0px;' href='https://inkbunny.net/Cormenthor'><img class='shadowedimage' style='border: 0px;' src='https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/usericons/small/52/52892_Cormenthor_bear_icon.gif' width='50' height='50' alt='Cormenthor' title='Cormenthor' /></a>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t</div>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t</td>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<td style='vertical-align: bottom; font-size: 10pt;'>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span style='position: relative; top: 2px;'><a href='https://inkbunny.net/Cormenthor' class='widget_userNameSmall'>Cormenthor</a></span>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t</td>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t</tr>\r\n\t\t\t\t\t\t</table><br />Marke Jameson (Bernese Mountain Dog)<br />Bob Jameson <br />Alice Jameson<br />Sharleen<br />Debbie Conner (American Short Eared Rabbit)<br />Arnold &ldquo;Arny&rdquo; Kielder<br />Dr. Jamal White <br />Sam Thomas (saluki)<br /></span>",
  "writing": "[center][b][u]A Day Like Any Other[/u][/b][/center]\n\n[u][b]September 21[/b][/u]\n\n[b]WHACK![/b]\n\nOnce again Mark would be needing a new alarm clock soon, this one had two, perhaps three more days of being slammed into the wall left before it would give up the ghost like so many had before it.\n\nHe yawned and stretched as he slowly pried himself from the cocoon of sheets and blankets he found himself partially confined within. ‘Damn it, I don’t think I’ll ever get used to sleeping alone again.’ he thought to himself. That sole thought stirring up the memories of the year he spent mated to Debbie Conners.\n\n[b]“FUCK, why the hell did I think of that again?”[/b] he screamed aloud berating himself. There was one advantage to living alone like this, there wasn’t anyone to piss off if he woke up in a bad mood. A good thing, he had been doing so 7 days a week for over a year now. He mistakenly thought the isolation would be good for him, a good way to finally ease his troubled mind. It might have been if not for the constant reminder of all that he had thrown away.\n\nGlancing over to the spot the clock landed he could see that it was six forty five.\n “Time to get my ass up and get moving, I still have to get to class on time or there’ll be hell to pay.”\n\n Sliding himself to the edge of the bed, his feet dropping to the floor as he pushed himself into a seated position,  he forced himself back into the waking world. Glancing to the closet he saw his last clean school uniform for Prairie Flats Prep hanging there. “At least it’s Friday, need to drop the jackets off at the cleaners and wash the rest over the weekend though.”\n\nHe gathered up the dirty clothes using the oversized duffel bag as always, cramming the dirty laundry into it. Taking the clean uniform and the extra blazer from the closet he snatched up the laundry and headed for the stairs. He tossed the duffle bag into the laundry room on his way into the kitchen to have breakfast, dry toast and a pot of coffee. Subconsciously following his morning routine he watered down the coffee to cool it slightly instead of waiting and drank it quickly. After gulping down his second cup he put on that dreaded uniform, grabbed his phone and keys from the counter and headed out the front door closing it behind himself. Hopping into the forest green Jeep Wrangler he fired it up and headed down the dirt path from his cabin towards Winter Cliff. Jackson Road, which would take him down to I-70 was off main street as the far end of the seemingly sleepy mountain town. Checking his watch he saw he had almost 2 hours to get to Prairie Flats Prep but he just wasn’t in the mood to put up with a half an hours worth of his mom badgering him about coming to visit more. He decided to just head straight for school. He needed to stop at the 7-11 on the way, the one three miles from the school he could hang out at and kill time. He was almost out of Winter Creek when he saw the flashing lights behind him in the rear view mirror. “Fucking great! Now what?” he grumbled pulling over and parking the Jeep at the side of the road. Digging his wallet out of his back pocket, extracting his license, registration and insurance card, he held them out the side of the Jeep. As the officer exited his cruiser Mark could see it was Arnold Kielder that had pulled him over. ‘What the fuck does he want this time?’ he mumbled to himself as he watched his long time friend coming up alongside him in the vehicles side mirror.\n\n He liked the guy, but he really wasn’t in any kind of mood to talk to anyone today, not even an old friend like Arny. ”So what did I supposedly do this time?” he tried to be less snappy then he felt, failing miserably.\n\n“Other then not let anyone know if your alive or dead for over two weeks? Nothin much .” He was trying to lighten the mood, maybe defuse him even. Mark didn’t know and didn’t particularly give a shit either. “So what ya want Arny? Just to shoot the shit or what? I really need to get to school and honor my agreement with my dad,  so I don’t have to hear that shit  from him again for hours on end.”\n\nArny looked at Mark sadly, no one in town could understood what had turned the Bernese boy that had been so level headed and focused into the angry, bitter, resentful young man that Mark had become. Hell he didn’t have a clue either and he’d know the boy nearly his whole life. But it was obvious the boy wasn’t in any better mood today then he had been in the last several months. “Just go by and see your mother Mark, she worries about you.” the sadness evident in his voice.\n\n“Yea, yea, yea, I will, you have my word that I will, if nothing else you know that counts for something still OK?  Can I go now or is there something else?” he all but spit the words out at the man.\n\n“Yea, just be careful and stay out of trouble Mark.” he said turning to walk back to his cruiser as the teen fired up the jeep and drove off.\n\nHe hated having to drive through Winter Creek every damn day, but it was the only way to get from his home to the road that would wind down Grays Peak and get him to I-70. He drove on in silence, that was the one thing the mountains had no shortage of silence.\n\nAs he drove down the winding mountain road with it’s twists and turns and switchbacks the realization that he was approaching Goldmans ravine brought back an odd desire, one which struck him every day as he came to this curve in the road. Once again he let go of the wheel keeping his speed constant and letting the Jeep follow it’s path. Every day for the past few months, ever since he had gotten his license and bought the Jeep, he had done this. Secretly hoping he’d stop chickening out at the last second and jerking the wheel back to avoid going over the edge. He wanted to every time he reached this curve in the road, it would only take a moment and he’d be flying off the road and out into a free fall that would end 870 feet below. Then it would all be over, nothing more to feel, nothing more to tear at his heart, just nothing.\n\n*Ping Ping Ping Ping, screech* the sounds of gravel launched against the guard rail and tires struggling to regain traction as they contacted smooth blacktop again. Once again he’d jerked the wheel back, subconsciously pulling himself from the precipice at the last second as the words that had been part of his life for as long as he could remember came unbidden to his mind again, ‘Do no harm’\n\n“Who the fuck even cares, huh? I don’t, so who the fuck really cares.\nWhy?\nWhy?\nWHY?\n TELL ME THAT MARK!\n TELL ME WHY YOU DON’T JUST END THIS NIGHTMARE YOU FUCKING GUTLESS COWARD!!!! “\n\n[center]==========[/center]\n\nAn hour later he pulled up to the pumps in front of the 7-11 in Prairie Flats and killed the engine getting out of the Jeep. He entered the store walking along the refrigerated drink coolers searching  until he saw the SoBe Fire drinks and pilled open the glass door. He grabbed three of them and walked to the chip display rack adding Cheddar and bacon potato skins to his snack selection. After getting a large coffee and adding a few ice cubes from the fountain drink dispenser to the cup he walked to the register setting his items on the counter.\n\n“Forty bucks on pump 3 and this crap.” as the clerk rang up his purchase and bagged the snacks up.\n\n“Forty seven eighty three sir,” the Otter girl said with a smile. He didn’t even really look at her, just tossed his debit card at her and grabbed the bag. As she handed him his receipt and card back she tried to be pleasant to him again, “here you are sir, have a nice day and come back soon.”\n\n“Yea what the fuck ever.” he grumbled as he walked out the door.\n\n“What an asshole,” he heard the white cat girl that had been at the other register say as he exited the store.\n\nHe walked out to the Jeep tossing the bag in the front passengers seat before pumping his gas. He climbed into the drivers seat starting the engine and hanging a right as he left the store headed on to his destination, Prairie Flats Prep  School. As he drove the last three miles of his five day a week journey he found himself once again engaging in the same conversation with himself he had every day, hearing the answers in his mind as he always did.\n\n “When did I become such an insufferable asshole?”\n “You know the answer to that but you don’t have the balls to say it do you?”\n“Fuck you, know it all cocksucker.”\n“Same old Mark asks the questions but to much of a pussy to answer them.”\n“NO! Fuck this, I am not doing this again, just fuck it.”\n\nHe drove the rest of the way in silence and parked the Jeep in the student lot sitting there, drinking one of the SoBe Fire drinks and eating his potato skins as he waited  until time to go inside.\n\n[center]============[/center]\n\nHe drudged his way through yet another day of mundane, mind numbing bullshit that constituted his school day. When the days last bell rang at last he got the hell out of the building as fast as possible heading for his escape vehicle. Remarkably he had gotten through another day without  ending up in detention. That was a rare occupance lately, but then again he really didn’t give a shit either way. Just as he was about to get into the Jeep his phone buzzed. Pulling it out and checking the screen he saw the weekly reminder blinking at him. “Fuck I hate Fridays.”\n\nHe hopped in and drove downtown to the medical professionals pavilion and headed up to suite 318, the charming offices of Dr Jamal White, or as Mark called him unflatteringly Killroy the Killjoy. The psychologist he was under school and court orders to see once a week. It was bullshit as far as he was concerned but he had no choice.\n\nHe stepped into the front office and the receptionist an attractive panther woman in her late 20s nodded towards the inner door, “Go on in he’s ready for you.”\n\n“OK,” he said dismissively.\n\nAs he opened the door the head shrinker looked up and sighed, “Well is today going to be any different or will we be going through the same inane rants and sullen silences as always Mr. Jameson? Or shall we actually try to resolve something today?”\n\nThe porcupine seated behind the desk, late 30s from the look of him, was far from being intimidating. Quite the opposite in fact he had a look about him that to most people would be calming, reassuring even perhaps. His short five foot four inch stature and slightly pudgy build lent quite a bit to his appearance being non threatening. Even the mans spectacles, horn rimmed and perched atop his muzzle seemed to match his personality It wasn’t that Mark disliked the man, he’d actually found him to generally be more then tolerable. No it wasn’t the man he disliked, not even that he was a psychologist, it was being forced to be here that he detested. So what if he was, as they labeled him, an angry aggressive teen prone to violence, big deal. What like he was the only one in existence? Far from it, though he may have been one of the worst ones by some peoples standards. He wouldn’t be here at all if things had gone only slightly different that day. If that idiot of a tiger had just backed down or shut his mouth.........\n\n“Oh what the hell doc, why not.” Mark sighed the words more then spoke them as he flung himself into the chair across the desk from the man. “Where shall we start. Hmmm?”\n\n“Well if your serious, then why don’t you start with the incident that landed you here in the first place and we’ll go from there at some point.” Jamal said as he pulled his legal pad in front of him and tapped his pen lightly against it.\n\n“Ok then, well.....................\n\n[center]==============[/center]\n\nIt was just another Monday, like so many before it, just another day to get through and go back home to get through another night. All so I could wake up and do it all over again. Wasn’t anything really different about it. Wake up, toast and coffee, drive through Winter Creek to the main road. Make the drive down from Grays Peak to I-70 then on to Prairie Flats and school. Same drive I’d made 5 days a week for a month since I got my drivers license and school had started. First three classes of the day, Geometry 102, English 103, then World History, bored nearly to death and just wanted it to be done with as always. Lunch was next so I headed to the cafeteria, got my tray of slop and headed to my usual spot, small table in the back corner of the room where I always sat. Only spot I could get my back against the wall so anything coming at me had to do it head on not sneak up behind me. Started out peaceful enough, no one bothering me just letting me sit there and eat in peace. Then Matt had to catch sight of me from across the room. He had his group of four thug wanna b’ with him as always, and I guess he decided I was to be his target du jour. I’d put up with his crap for nearly a year now. Mainly because I could just ignore him for the most part, let him do his BMOC thing and move on. He had been bypassing me for a couple of weeks, some recent transfer student had caught his attention and he had been tormenting the poor guy which put me under his radar I guess. But not today, today he spied me and made a beeline for where I sat. Oh well better get it over with and move on, like always I guess. As he approached though another kid I’d seen around lately, what was his name, Sam?. Yea Sam Thompson, walked over and started yapping at me, something about being in the same science class and wanting a lab partner, I wasn’t really listening to be honest. I was watching Matt since he didn’t even slow down to pal it up with anyone just kept coming at me with that smug grin he always had on his face once he had a target in sight. When Matt got a few feet from the table I said something to the Saluki kid Sam like let me think about it or some shit to get him to go away so he’d be out of harms way.\n\n\nWasn’t quick enough though and Matt looked at the kid and said, “So what have we here, Mark and his new boy toy or what?”\n\n“Matt, since your such a great person why don’t you do the world a huge favor, and go ass rape yourself?” yea, I said it. loud enough the whole room could hear it which brought the cafeteria to an almost instant silence.\n\n“What the fuck did you just say to me bitch boy?” was his witty response.\n\n“I said go ass rape yourself, didn’t stutter either. You have hearing problems as well as being less then brilliant now Matt?” Wasn’t in the mood for his shit and just wanted it done, so if I could make him mad enough he’d just go off and brood. But no, he had a two for one so he turned his attention to the Saluki.\n\n“So,” Matt chuckled, “how many times a day you suck off your doggy boyfriend fag boy?”\n\nPoor Sam was so stunned he just stood there his mouth agape as everyone close enough to see and hear the exchange started laughing.\n\n“Yea see, he’s got the position right, though I think he’s being optimistic about how wide he has to open his jaws. What ya think boys, am I right?” the insufferable ass just wouldn’t shut up.\n\n“Matt, leave the guy alone, Jesus are you so hard up you have to try to suck every cock that moves?” from his reaction as he jerked around to stare at me I knew I got to him pissed off finally.\n\n“You sayin I’m queer boy? If you are I’m gonna have to beat your fag ass to death!” he spit the words out like they were acid, but he wasn’t about to back down from a dog and I wasn’t about to back down from him, not this time.\n\n“Just sayin, I don’t remember ever seeing you with any girl in this school. It’s always you and the sausage brigade here, always together, always close to each other, always pattin each other on the ass when you think no ones looking. In fact, has anyone ever seen any of these guys with a girl or is it always just the five swinging dicks together?” The tigers eyes flew open, I finally had him hooked as a murmur went around the room, some agreeing with what I had said.\n\n“From there it just got worse fast, long story short doc, they wanted to brawl and after shoving the Saluki kid out of the way I gave them what they wanted. Like most they underestimated a Bernese dogs strength. I didn’t go untouched by a long shot regardless of what the ‘official intra-school incident report’ says. I was scratched and clawed all over and the next day had a bunch of bruises. But yea I sent all five of them and some doofus that decided to jump in to the ER to get patched up, stitched up and a couple of broken bones set. I know you’ve read the school reports, and any other witness accounts that they didn’t either lose, trash or alter by one means or another, now you’ve heard my side of it. Believe who ever you want, I truly don’t give a shit what you believe.”   Mark said as he finished.\n\n“It really doesn’t matter who I do or don’t believe Mark, that’s not what I’m here for. What I am here for though is to help you get to the root of your anger issues.” he said holding up a hand to stop Mark from responding, as he knew he would. “Mark, your an intelligent young man, your grades more then prove that. But your holding yourself back, in many ways, and I’m trying to understand why. But I can’t do that without your help, you have to be honest with me and you have to talk to me. I’m not here to take your side or take someone else’s side against you Mark. I’m here to help you understand why you hate the world, or yourself or what ever it is that you have such strong feelings about that manifests itself in your anger. You’ve finally made a tiny step in that direction and I’m glad of it. But you’ve got a long way to go and I won’t, as you would put it, 'blow smoke up your ass', it’s going to be a long road. But your the only one that can travel that road Mark, I’m just along as a guide to help you see the ditches along the way.”\n\n“Alright, alright I get it Doc. I guess as long as you don’t push me, and expect me to turn into some bawling blubbering idiot that pours his guts out to you, I can at least try to stop being such an ass and give it a try ok?” Mark was, for the first time since Jamal had started having sessions with him, not utterly intolerable. He had at long last opened up with his side of the story of the events from the day that had been the final straw for the prep school.\n\n“That is all I will ask of you Mark that you at least try.” he waited a few moments then added in a lighter tone, “See you next week then?”\n\n“As always doc.” Mark turned and walked to the door and just before he opened it turned back to the shrink, “and doc? Thanks, for putting up with me.” turning he opened the door and walked out.\n\n[center]==============[/center]\n\nTwo hours later Mark pulled into the driveway of the house he had called home up until 2 years ago when his father had given the Jameson Hollow property over to him, he still believed it was just to get him out of this house and out of his sight. He sat there for a few minutes undecided if it wouldn’t just be better to go back to the cabin and say fuck it. Switching off the engine of the Jeep and climbing out he decided, ‘can’t do that, I gave Arny my word I’d come by and see mom, besides can’t be any worse then every other time.\n\nAs he was reaching into the back of the Jeep to grab the other SoBe drink he’d purchased earlier he heard a car pull into the drive next to him. Looking up he saw his father get out of the light gray Prius, “Well, it seems the progeny does remember where he came from after all.”  Same underlying anger in his voice as there had been for years.\n\n“Only because you set your pet cop on my ass again.” Mark snapped back at the man.\n\n“Wouldn’t need to if you’d call your mother once a week instead of treating her like she has the plague. Your silence hurts her more then anything else you do. But I guess that doesn’t really matter much to you does it? After all you just don’t give a fuck about anyone right? “\n\n“Yea, right as always DAD,” here we go again mark thought, “don’t worry though, won’t be here long ‘cause I wouldn’t want to put you to the trouble of having to look at me for more then five minutes.”\n\n“Why are you such an insufferable asshole Mark? Can you possibly tell me that?” as usual, at least it had been for a year now, Bob was unable to understand how they had grown so far apart.\n\n“If I even answer that what difference would it really make, Dad? I mean really, why the fuck do you even care huh?” Mark knew what was coming next, it always did.\n\n“I’ve always cared about you Mark, your the one who shut me out remember?” Why couldn’t they ever just talk anymore. Why did it always have to go straight to the fight. Bob wondered.\n\n“You’ve always cared about me?  Are you fucking kidding me? If you cared so fucking much then tell me one thing DAD. Tell me why, when I needed you the most, why did you turn your back on me and send me into exile?” Why, why had he after two years said that?\n\n“Mark, I never did any such....” his father started to defend himself against this onslaught.\n\n“The FUCK you didn’t, it’s exactly what you did. Forced solitude isn’t always the answer DAD,” ‘Shut up Mark, just shut up and walk away.’ his mind screamed at him.\n\n“When my whole world was crashing down around me, when my heart was breaking and I felt like I was losing my mind did I get fatherly advice, or a mothers love and support? NO I got packed up and dumped in the middle of nowhere . When I needed you the most I ever had in my life, you pushed me away and left me alone, and MOM let you do it.” Mark slammed the back of the Jeep closed and got back into the vehicle.\n\n“Son I don’t understand....”\n\n“No DAD, you don’t understand, not now, not a year ago and for fucking sure not two years ago when I needed you and mom the most and you hauled my ass of to the mountains and dumped me at the cabin and left me there.”  Mark was barely able to contain himself as years of rage, anger, and heartbreak boiled at last to the surface. The pain as fresh as if it had happened just yesterday. Clawing and tearing at him as it had been ever since. As he fired up the Jeep and jammed it into reverse he leaned out the side..\n\n“Fuck this, fuck you and fuck the world DAD! You don’t get it at all, don’t get me at all. I doubt you even have a clue what I’m talking about so here, I’ll give you a clue, Charleen.......”\n\nIt was all he could say, as soon as he spoke her name he was unable to utter another sound.\nHe tore out of the drive into the street jamming the gear shift into drive and flooring the Jeep as he sped out of the neighborhood he had grown up in. Tearing through Winter creek in a blind rage of emotions that he thought he had buried and forgotten.\n\nBob Jameson stood there his mouth agape as the tears began well up in his eyes. Unconsciously he brought his hand up to cover his mouth as he began to weep. Had he actually been wrong in thinking that he was doing the right thing back then by giving his son the space and time to deal with his emotions. Had his actions caused this change in his son.\n\nAs he stood there trying to sort things out his wife Alice came out of the house and as she walked up beside her husband asked, “What was he so mad about this time?” As he turned towards her she suddenly say the pain and anguish in his eyes, but before she could ask what was wrong he quietly said, “Charleen.”\n\n[center]============[/center]\n\nThe drive from town to the cabin hadn’t lessened his emotions at all. Mark switched off the jeep and bailed out heading straight for the small shed behind the cabin. Jerking open the door he grabbed the pack hanging on the inside of it that he always kept packed and ready to go. Reaching in he grabbed the handles of the dark green gear bag laying on the floor and hoisted it out as he slammed the door shut. Jamming his arms through the straps of the pack and pulling it into place across his shoulders he picked up the gear bag and set out to the Northeast towards        Mount Bierstadt.\n\nMark saw very little of the scenery along the way his mind still a jumbled turmoil of memories and emotions as he hiked towards the mountain peak he had climbed almost a dozen times. He knew almost every inch of the fourteener in detail, same for Sawtooth since they were joined as part of the ridge. He knew the spot he was headed to even better, he’d always go there any time he climbed the area. Nice spot to reflect on life, and how much it sucked. He headed towards the south as he neared the base of Sawtooth and followed the hiking trail to the bend that would take him along the southern flank then turned off onto the tiny foot path that lead off to the north to the ridge line. Following the ridge he arrived at his chosen spot within ten minutes of reaching the crest line. He followed along the nearly unseen path that would lead him to his favorite perch, a small outcropping above the shear drop of the eastern face of Sawtooth. Lowering himself over the edge onto the outcropping he settled himself in and looked out over the valley before him.\n\nThis place usually brought him a sense of peace, helped to calm his nerves and ease his troubled mind. But not today, not after the exchange with his dad a few hours ago. As he sat there the conversation came to his mind again unbidden. Even though he tried to stop it, smash it down, squash it from his mind and memory for ever, it was no use. He’d never get it out, be rid of it. It would haunt him when he least expected it, torturing and tormenting him for the rest of his life.\nWhy? Why couldn’t it stay buried in the past?\n\nHe looked around and spotted the boulder that was his usual anchor point and walked over to it dropping his gear bag at his feet. Withdrawing the kevlar wrapped rope he tossed it over the big rock and secured it in place attaching the screw gate carabiner in place and looping his descent rope through it in a half hitch. Slipping into his harness and checking the straps and buckles he looked out over the valley again. He’d have enough time to rappel the spot twice and free climb back up before the light started to give out. He attached the figure eight descender to his harness with another screw gate carabiner locking it in place and feeding his descent rope through it. Grabbing the kevlar mat from the bag he headed to the edge of the precipice and lay it in place before tossing the coil of the rap line over the edge. This was the best spot for rapping since there was a small outcropping that made an excellent foot holed four feet below the edge. He fed out the line to give him enough slack to reach it then dropped over the edge landing both feet on the outcrop easily. Making sure his friction mat was under the rope and checking everything one last time he was ready.  He pushed off the rock face letting about 8 feet of rope zip through the descender before gripping the rope again as he swung back toward the rock face. He repeated this several times until he came to the second outcropping about 100 feet from the top. This one was larger and jutted out a good ten feet from the main face of the drop and from here down it would be a free fall to the bottom as he wouldn’t be close to the rock face again until the last forty or fifty feet. He stood at the edge slowly paying out rope as he leaned backward until he was in a horizontal position then he slid his feet off the overhang letting himself slide down the rope about three feet before halting his descent again clearing the overhang cleanly.\n\nMost of the people Mark used to rappel with didn’t really like free falls, he loved them and always tried to find areas that had at least one in the decent, even if it was a short one. That’s what drew him to this spot, a single free fall that was almost seven hundred feet. After letting himself descend about thirty feet below the outcrop he tied off his decent line, just hanging there taking in the view across the valley. As far as a view he loved this time of year to be on the rocks, although the deciduous trees in this area were generally sparse at best and were primarily Narrowleaf Pine and Quaking Aspen there were quite a few visible in this particular area because of the proximity of the valley below. Their color change in the fall a stark contrast to the greens of the various pines, firs, spruces and cedars that were predominate in the mountains. With the cooling temperatures common for late September they had began to change adding splashes of color to the green expanse below. Mark lowered himself another fifty feet again tieing off the descent rope. Then pulling a sling from the pocket of his pack he looped it around his back and tied it to the rope and lay back against it to rest his arms as he took in the scenery around him again. He closed his eyes and let his mind wander for a bit thinking about the first time he had seen this cliff. It had been eight years ago last month. Early July of 2004. This was one of those things he usually tried to keep from coming to mind, he didn’t know why, maybe because of the talk with Jamal earlier today, but this time he just let the memories come.\n\n[center]============[/center]\n\n[i]He and Debbie Conners had been officially handfasted, mated to each other, for a couple of weeks and had been left to their own devices at his families cabin, the very cabin he now resided in full time in fact. They were truly like a couple of kids in a candy store. But because they were both wiccan and were bound as a couple, considered all but married to each other, the candy was each others bodies and they were eating all they could stand. They had some rough spots in the beginning but had managed to survive even the worst ordeal of all, Debbie being kidnaped by an ex-lover who attempted to rape her. Mark had tracked them down and saved her from the guy. That was the primary reason their parents had\\d brought them to the cabin to be left alone by everyone so they could get past their ordeal and be a happy couple. They had gotten up one morning and put on clothes, which they didn’t do very often while they were at the cabin, and decided to go explore the surrounding woods and mountain peaks. Marks family had hiked all of them several times and he wanted to show his love the beauty of the valley. They had come across this cliff and he memorized the area. He’d come here many times and rappeled this cliff over the years, sometimes alone, sometimes with friends and more then once with a lover. He and Debbie had, almost a year later during the time they had been mated rappeled over this very spot and while suspended over 500 feet above the ground made love in a sling rig he had improvised on the spur of the moment. His memories of that encounter flooded his mind now and he smiled, something he rarely did these days, as vivid images of their coupling high above the ground played in his mind like a movie. That had been some of the most intense sex he’d ever had with anyone and it still ranked pretty high on the list.[/i]\n\n[center]===========[/center]\n\nA shift in the wind roused him from his revery, blinking he realized the sun had dropped lower in the sky then he had expected. He’d only have time for the one rappel but he’d have to hike back to the top to get his gear and head home. Though the trip down that side street along memory lane had felt.....good. Something he thought for such a long time he’d never feel again. Maybe, just maybe Jamal was right, maybe there were memories worth keeping, maybe there was a tiny sliver of hope that he could some day be happy again.\n\n“Well, either way it’s time to get down off this rock.” he said to himself.\n Mark untied the sling stowing it back into his pack and stretching a bit before he continued his descent. Untiing the locking knots he jerked the cinch hitch out and slid slightly as his weight returned to the line. Loosening his grip slightly he let the rope slide smoothly through the figure eight descender lowering him self in a controlled free fall stopping every forty feet or so to avoid rope burns.\n\nAs he descended he thought about how he hadn’t done any climbing or rappeling in almost a year and realized he missed it.  Sooner then he thought, even sooner the he would have liked, he found himself standing on solid ground again looking back up the cliff face. He had let his demons rule his life for too long, Jamal was right it was time for him to face them and get on with his life. But he wondered, did he even have the strength to do it now? Would it really be worth the inevitable pain from dealing with them once and for all to make it to the other side? What would happen if, in releasing them from the prison of his mind to deal with them, they finally won the struggle and over took him? Almost everyday at the curve in the road he had attempted to just drive over the cliff and end it all, but every time he had stopped himself at the last second, jerking the Jeep back onto the road and continued on. That was exactly what he had been doing every waking moment for the last three years, continuing on, hour by hour, day by day, for three long years. Yet he had tried so many times in the last few months to end it, to end the pain, the suffering, the torture he imposed on himself. Much like he had imposed this exile on himself, trying to ........what? Escape? No, to hide, he realized it at last, he was hiding from his demons, from the world, but most of all from himself. He’d known it all along, but until now he refused to admit it, or even to allow himself to think it. Yes, it was time to start facing those demons, win or lose it was time to do what he should have done back then. He turned towards the trail that would lead him back to the top of the ridge his mind made up that he was as ready as he’d ever be, he just hoped he had the strength for it.",
  "writing_bbcode_parsed": "<span style='word-wrap: break-word;'><div class='align_center'><strong><span class='underline'>A Day Like Any Other</span></strong></div><br /><br /><span class='underline'><strong>September 21</strong></span><br /><br /><strong>WHACK!</strong><br /><br />Once again Mark would be needing a new alarm clock soon, this one had two, perhaps three more days of being slammed into the wall left before it would give up the ghost like so many had before it.<br /><br />He yawned and stretched as he slowly pried himself from the cocoon of sheets and blankets he found himself partially confined within. &lsquo;Damn it, I don&rsquo;t think I&rsquo;ll ever get used to sleeping alone again.&rsquo; he thought to himself. That sole thought stirring up the memories of the year he spent mated to Debbie Conners.<br /><br /><strong>&ldquo;FUCK, why the hell did I think of that again?&rdquo;</strong> he screamed aloud berating himself. There was one advantage to living alone like this, there wasn&rsquo;t anyone to piss off if he woke up in a bad mood. A good thing, he had been doing so 7 days a week for over a year now. He mistakenly thought the isolation would be good for him, a good way to finally ease his troubled mind. It might have been if not for the constant reminder of all that he had thrown away.<br /><br />Glancing over to the spot the clock landed he could see that it was six forty five.<br />&nbsp;&ldquo;Time to get my ass up and get moving, I still have to get to class on time or there&rsquo;ll be hell to pay.&rdquo;<br /><br />&nbsp;Sliding himself to the edge of the bed, his feet dropping to the floor as he pushed himself into a seated position,&nbsp;&nbsp;he forced himself back into the waking world. Glancing to the closet he saw his last clean school uniform for Prairie Flats Prep hanging there. &ldquo;At least it&rsquo;s Friday, need to drop the jackets off at the cleaners and wash the rest over the weekend though.&rdquo;<br /><br />He gathered up the dirty clothes using the oversized duffel bag as always, cramming the dirty laundry into it. Taking the clean uniform and the extra blazer from the closet he snatched up the laundry and headed for the stairs. He tossed the duffle bag into the laundry room on his way into the kitchen to have breakfast, dry toast and a pot of coffee. Subconsciously following his morning routine he watered down the coffee to cool it slightly instead of waiting and drank it quickly. After gulping down his second cup he put on that dreaded uniform, grabbed his phone and keys from the counter and headed out the front door closing it behind himself. Hopping into the forest green Jeep Wrangler he fired it up and headed down the dirt path from his cabin towards Winter Cliff. Jackson Road, which would take him down to I-70 was off main street as the far end of the seemingly sleepy mountain town. Checking his watch he saw he had almost 2 hours to get to Prairie Flats Prep but he just wasn&rsquo;t in the mood to put up with a half an hours worth of his mom badgering him about coming to visit more. He decided to just head straight for school. He needed to stop at the 7-11 on the way, the one three miles from the school he could hang out at and kill time. He was almost out of Winter Creek when he saw the flashing lights behind him in the rear view mirror. &ldquo;Fucking great! Now what?&rdquo; he grumbled pulling over and parking the Jeep at the side of the road. Digging his wallet out of his back pocket, extracting his license, registration and insurance card, he held them out the side of the Jeep. As the officer exited his cruiser Mark could see it was Arnold Kielder that had pulled him over. &lsquo;What the fuck does he want this time?&rsquo; he mumbled to himself as he watched his long time friend coming up alongside him in the vehicles side mirror.<br /><br />&nbsp;He liked the guy, but he really wasn&rsquo;t in any kind of mood to talk to anyone today, not even an old friend like Arny. &rdquo;So what did I supposedly do this time?&rdquo; he tried to be less snappy then he felt, failing miserably.<br /><br />&ldquo;Other then not let anyone know if your alive or dead for over two weeks? Nothin much .&rdquo; He was trying to lighten the mood, maybe defuse him even. Mark didn&rsquo;t know and didn&rsquo;t particularly give a shit either. &ldquo;So what ya want Arny? Just to shoot the shit or what? I really need to get to school and honor my agreement with my dad,&nbsp;&nbsp;so I don&rsquo;t have to hear that shit&nbsp;&nbsp;from him again for hours on end.&rdquo;<br /><br />Arny looked at Mark sadly, no one in town could understood what had turned the Bernese boy that had been so level headed and focused into the angry, bitter, resentful young man that Mark had become. Hell he didn&rsquo;t have a clue either and he&rsquo;d know the boy nearly his whole life. But it was obvious the boy wasn&rsquo;t in any better mood today then he had been in the last several months. &ldquo;Just go by and see your mother Mark, she worries about you.&rdquo; the sadness evident in his voice.<br /><br />&ldquo;Yea, yea, yea, I will, you have my word that I will, if nothing else you know that counts for something still OK?&nbsp;&nbsp;Can I go now or is there something else?&rdquo; he all but spit the words out at the man.<br /><br />&ldquo;Yea, just be careful and stay out of trouble Mark.&rdquo; he said turning to walk back to his cruiser as the teen fired up the jeep and drove off.<br /><br />He hated having to drive through Winter Creek every damn day, but it was the only way to get from his home to the road that would wind down Grays Peak and get him to I-70. He drove on in silence, that was the one thing the mountains had no shortage of silence.<br /><br />As he drove down the winding mountain road with it&rsquo;s twists and turns and switchbacks the realization that he was approaching Goldmans ravine brought back an odd desire, one which struck him every day as he came to this curve in the road. Once again he let go of the wheel keeping his speed constant and letting the Jeep follow it&rsquo;s path. Every day for the past few months, ever since he had gotten his license and bought the Jeep, he had done this. Secretly hoping he&rsquo;d stop chickening out at the last second and jerking the wheel back to avoid going over the edge. He wanted to every time he reached this curve in the road, it would only take a moment and he&rsquo;d be flying off the road and out into a free fall that would end 870 feet below. Then it would all be over, nothing more to feel, nothing more to tear at his heart, just nothing.<br /><br />*Ping Ping Ping Ping, screech* the sounds of gravel launched against the guard rail and tires struggling to regain traction as they contacted smooth blacktop again. Once again he&rsquo;d jerked the wheel back, subconsciously pulling himself from the precipice at the last second as the words that had been part of his life for as long as he could remember came unbidden to his mind again, &lsquo;Do no harm&rsquo;<br /><br />&ldquo;Who the fuck even cares, huh? I don&rsquo;t, so who the fuck really cares.<br />Why?<br />Why?<br />WHY?<br />&nbsp;TELL ME THAT MARK!<br />&nbsp;TELL ME WHY YOU DON&rsquo;T JUST END THIS NIGHTMARE YOU FUCKING GUTLESS COWARD!!!! &ldquo;<br /><br /><div class='align_center'>==========</div><br /><br />An hour later he pulled up to the pumps in front of the 7-11 in Prairie Flats and killed the engine getting out of the Jeep. He entered the store walking along the refrigerated drink coolers searching&nbsp;&nbsp;until he saw the SoBe Fire drinks and pilled open the glass door. He grabbed three of them and walked to the chip display rack adding Cheddar and bacon potato skins to his snack selection. After getting a large coffee and adding a few ice cubes from the fountain drink dispenser to the cup he walked to the register setting his items on the counter.<br /><br />&ldquo;Forty bucks on pump 3 and this crap.&rdquo; as the clerk rang up his purchase and bagged the snacks up.<br /><br />&ldquo;Forty seven eighty three sir,&rdquo; the Otter girl said with a smile. He didn&rsquo;t even really look at her, just tossed his debit card at her and grabbed the bag. As she handed him his receipt and card back she tried to be pleasant to him again, &ldquo;here you are sir, have a nice day and come back soon.&rdquo;<br /><br />&ldquo;Yea what the fuck ever.&rdquo; he grumbled as he walked out the door.<br /><br />&ldquo;What an asshole,&rdquo; he heard the white cat girl that had been at the other register say as he exited the store.<br /><br />He walked out to the Jeep tossing the bag in the front passengers seat before pumping his gas. He climbed into the drivers seat starting the engine and hanging a right as he left the store headed on to his destination, Prairie Flats Prep&nbsp;&nbsp;School. As he drove the last three miles of his five day a week journey he found himself once again engaging in the same conversation with himself he had every day, hearing the answers in his mind as he always did.<br /><br />&nbsp;&ldquo;When did I become such an insufferable asshole?&rdquo;<br />&nbsp;&ldquo;You know the answer to that but you don&rsquo;t have the balls to say it do you?&rdquo;<br />&ldquo;Fuck you, know it all cocksucker.&rdquo;<br />&ldquo;Same old Mark asks the questions but to much of a pussy to answer them.&rdquo;<br />&ldquo;NO! Fuck this, I am not doing this again, just fuck it.&rdquo;<br /><br />He drove the rest of the way in silence and parked the Jeep in the student lot sitting there, drinking one of the SoBe Fire drinks and eating his potato skins as he waited&nbsp;&nbsp;until time to go inside.<br /><br /><div class='align_center'>============</div><br /><br />He drudged his way through yet another day of mundane, mind numbing bullshit that constituted his school day. When the days last bell rang at last he got the hell out of the building as fast as possible heading for his escape vehicle. Remarkably he had gotten through another day without&nbsp;&nbsp;ending up in detention. That was a rare occupance lately, but then again he really didn&rsquo;t give a shit either way. Just as he was about to get into the Jeep his phone buzzed. Pulling it out and checking the screen he saw the weekly reminder blinking at him. &ldquo;Fuck I hate Fridays.&rdquo;<br /><br />He hopped in and drove downtown to the medical professionals pavilion and headed up to suite 318, the charming offices of Dr Jamal White, or as Mark called him unflatteringly Killroy the Killjoy. The psychologist he was under school and court orders to see once a week. It was bullshit as far as he was concerned but he had no choice.<br /><br />He stepped into the front office and the receptionist an attractive panther woman in her late 20s nodded towards the inner door, &ldquo;Go on in he&rsquo;s ready for you.&rdquo;<br /><br />&ldquo;OK,&rdquo; he said dismissively.<br /><br />As he opened the door the head shrinker looked up and sighed, &ldquo;Well is today going to be any different or will we be going through the same inane rants and sullen silences as always Mr. Jameson? Or shall we actually try to resolve something today?&rdquo;<br /><br />The porcupine seated behind the desk, late 30s from the look of him, was far from being intimidating. Quite the opposite in fact he had a look about him that to most people would be calming, reassuring even perhaps. His short five foot four inch stature and slightly pudgy build lent quite a bit to his appearance being non threatening. Even the mans spectacles, horn rimmed and perched atop his muzzle seemed to match his personality It wasn&rsquo;t that Mark disliked the man, he&rsquo;d actually found him to generally be more then tolerable. No it wasn&rsquo;t the man he disliked, not even that he was a psychologist, it was being forced to be here that he detested. So what if he was, as they labeled him, an angry aggressive teen prone to violence, big deal. What like he was the only one in existence? Far from it, though he may have been one of the worst ones by some peoples standards. He wouldn&rsquo;t be here at all if things had gone only slightly different that day. If that idiot of a tiger had just backed down or shut his mouth.........<br /><br />&ldquo;Oh what the hell doc, why not.&rdquo; Mark sighed the words more then spoke them as he flung himself into the chair across the desk from the man. &ldquo;Where shall we start. Hmmm?&rdquo;<br /><br />&ldquo;Well if your serious, then why don&rsquo;t you start with the incident that landed you here in the first place and we&rsquo;ll go from there at some point.&rdquo; Jamal said as he pulled his legal pad in front of him and tapped his pen lightly against it.<br /><br />&ldquo;Ok then, well.....................<br /><br /><div class='align_center'>==============</div><br /><br />It was just another Monday, like so many before it, just another day to get through and go back home to get through another night. All so I could wake up and do it all over again. Wasn&rsquo;t anything really different about it. Wake up, toast and coffee, drive through Winter Creek to the main road. Make the drive down from Grays Peak to I-70 then on to Prairie Flats and school. Same drive I&rsquo;d made 5 days a week for a month since I got my drivers license and school had started. First three classes of the day, Geometry 102, English 103, then World History, bored nearly to death and just wanted it to be done with as always. Lunch was next so I headed to the cafeteria, got my tray of slop and headed to my usual spot, small table in the back corner of the room where I always sat. Only spot I could get my back against the wall so anything coming at me had to do it head on not sneak up behind me. Started out peaceful enough, no one bothering me just letting me sit there and eat in peace. Then Matt had to catch sight of me from across the room. He had his group of four thug wanna b&rsquo; with him as always, and I guess he decided I was to be his target du jour. I&rsquo;d put up with his crap for nearly a year now. Mainly because I could just ignore him for the most part, let him do his BMOC thing and move on. He had been bypassing me for a couple of weeks, some recent transfer student had caught his attention and he had been tormenting the poor guy which put me under his radar I guess. But not today, today he spied me and made a beeline for where I sat. Oh well better get it over with and move on, like always I guess. As he approached though another kid I&rsquo;d seen around lately, what was his name, Sam?. Yea Sam Thompson, walked over and started yapping at me, something about being in the same science class and wanting a lab partner, I wasn&rsquo;t really listening to be honest. I was watching Matt since he didn&rsquo;t even slow down to pal it up with anyone just kept coming at me with that smug grin he always had on his face once he had a target in sight. When Matt got a few feet from the table I said something to the Saluki kid Sam like let me think about it or some shit to get him to go away so he&rsquo;d be out of harms way.<br /><br /><br />Wasn&rsquo;t quick enough though and Matt looked at the kid and said, &ldquo;So what have we here, Mark and his new boy toy or what?&rdquo;<br /><br />&ldquo;Matt, since your such a great person why don&rsquo;t you do the world a huge favor, and go ass rape yourself?&rdquo; yea, I said it. loud enough the whole room could hear it which brought the cafeteria to an almost instant silence.<br /><br />&ldquo;What the fuck did you just say to me bitch boy?&rdquo; was his witty response.<br /><br />&ldquo;I said go ass rape yourself, didn&rsquo;t stutter either. You have hearing problems as well as being less then brilliant now Matt?&rdquo; Wasn&rsquo;t in the mood for his shit and just wanted it done, so if I could make him mad enough he&rsquo;d just go off and brood. But no, he had a two for one so he turned his attention to the Saluki.<br /><br />&ldquo;So,&rdquo; Matt chuckled, &ldquo;how many times a day you suck off your doggy boyfriend fag boy?&rdquo;<br /><br />Poor Sam was so stunned he just stood there his mouth agape as everyone close enough to see and hear the exchange started laughing.<br /><br />&ldquo;Yea see, he&rsquo;s got the position right, though I think he&rsquo;s being optimistic about how wide he has to open his jaws. What ya think boys, am I right?&rdquo; the insufferable ass just wouldn&rsquo;t shut up.<br /><br />&ldquo;Matt, leave the guy alone, Jesus are you so hard up you have to try to suck every cock that moves?&rdquo; from his reaction as he jerked around to stare at me I knew I got to him pissed off finally.<br /><br />&ldquo;You sayin I&rsquo;m queer boy? If you are I&rsquo;m gonna have to beat your fag ass to death!&rdquo; he spit the words out like they were acid, but he wasn&rsquo;t about to back down from a dog and I wasn&rsquo;t about to back down from him, not this time.<br /><br />&ldquo;Just sayin, I don&rsquo;t remember ever seeing you with any girl in this school. It&rsquo;s always you and the sausage brigade here, always together, always close to each other, always pattin each other on the ass when you think no ones looking. In fact, has anyone ever seen any of these guys with a girl or is it always just the five swinging dicks together?&rdquo; The tigers eyes flew open, I finally had him hooked as a murmur went around the room, some agreeing with what I had said.<br /><br />&ldquo;From there it just got worse fast, long story short doc, they wanted to brawl and after shoving the Saluki kid out of the way I gave them what they wanted. Like most they underestimated a Bernese dogs strength. I didn&rsquo;t go untouched by a long shot regardless of what the &lsquo;official intra-school incident report&rsquo; says. I was scratched and clawed all over and the next day had a bunch of bruises. But yea I sent all five of them and some doofus that decided to jump in to the ER to get patched up, stitched up and a couple of broken bones set. I know you&rsquo;ve read the school reports, and any other witness accounts that they didn&rsquo;t either lose, trash or alter by one means or another, now you&rsquo;ve heard my side of it. Believe who ever you want, I truly don&rsquo;t give a shit what you believe.&rdquo;&nbsp;&nbsp; Mark said as he finished.<br /><br />&ldquo;It really doesn&rsquo;t matter who I do or don&rsquo;t believe Mark, that&rsquo;s not what I&rsquo;m here for. What I am here for though is to help you get to the root of your anger issues.&rdquo; he said holding up a hand to stop Mark from responding, as he knew he would. &ldquo;Mark, your an intelligent young man, your grades more then prove that. But your holding yourself back, in many ways, and I&rsquo;m trying to understand why. But I can&rsquo;t do that without your help, you have to be honest with me and you have to talk to me. I&rsquo;m not here to take your side or take someone else&rsquo;s side against you Mark. I&rsquo;m here to help you understand why you hate the world, or yourself or what ever it is that you have such strong feelings about that manifests itself in your anger. You&rsquo;ve finally made a tiny step in that direction and I&rsquo;m glad of it. But you&rsquo;ve got a long way to go and I won&rsquo;t, as you would put it, &#039;blow smoke up your ass&#039;, it&rsquo;s going to be a long road. But your the only one that can travel that road Mark, I&rsquo;m just along as a guide to help you see the ditches along the way.&rdquo;<br /><br />&ldquo;Alright, alright I get it Doc. I guess as long as you don&rsquo;t push me, and expect me to turn into some bawling blubbering idiot that pours his guts out to you, I can at least try to stop being such an ass and give it a try ok?&rdquo; Mark was, for the first time since Jamal had started having sessions with him, not utterly intolerable. He had at long last opened up with his side of the story of the events from the day that had been the final straw for the prep school.<br /><br />&ldquo;That is all I will ask of you Mark that you at least try.&rdquo; he waited a few moments then added in a lighter tone, &ldquo;See you next week then?&rdquo;<br /><br />&ldquo;As always doc.&rdquo; Mark turned and walked to the door and just before he opened it turned back to the shrink, &ldquo;and doc? Thanks, for putting up with me.&rdquo; turning he opened the door and walked out.<br /><br /><div class='align_center'>==============</div><br /><br />Two hours later Mark pulled into the driveway of the house he had called home up until 2 years ago when his father had given the Jameson Hollow property over to him, he still believed it was just to get him out of this house and out of his sight. He sat there for a few minutes undecided if it wouldn&rsquo;t just be better to go back to the cabin and say fuck it. Switching off the engine of the Jeep and climbing out he decided, &lsquo;can&rsquo;t do that, I gave Arny my word I&rsquo;d come by and see mom, besides can&rsquo;t be any worse then every other time.<br /><br />As he was reaching into the back of the Jeep to grab the other SoBe drink he&rsquo;d purchased earlier he heard a car pull into the drive next to him. Looking up he saw his father get out of the light gray Prius, &ldquo;Well, it seems the progeny does remember where he came from after all.&rdquo;&nbsp;&nbsp;Same underlying anger in his voice as there had been for years.<br /><br />&ldquo;Only because you set your pet cop on my ass again.&rdquo; Mark snapped back at the man.<br /><br />&ldquo;Wouldn&rsquo;t need to if you&rsquo;d call your mother once a week instead of treating her like she has the plague. Your silence hurts her more then anything else you do. But I guess that doesn&rsquo;t really matter much to you does it? After all you just don&rsquo;t give a fuck about anyone right? &ldquo;<br /><br />&ldquo;Yea, right as always DAD,&rdquo; here we go again mark thought, &ldquo;don&rsquo;t worry though, won&rsquo;t be here long &lsquo;cause I wouldn&rsquo;t want to put you to the trouble of having to look at me for more then five minutes.&rdquo;<br /><br />&ldquo;Why are you such an insufferable asshole Mark? Can you possibly tell me that?&rdquo; as usual, at least it had been for a year now, Bob was unable to understand how they had grown so far apart.<br /><br />&ldquo;If I even answer that what difference would it really make, Dad? I mean really, why the fuck do you even care huh?&rdquo; Mark knew what was coming next, it always did.<br /><br />&ldquo;I&rsquo;ve always cared about you Mark, your the one who shut me out remember?&rdquo; Why couldn&rsquo;t they ever just talk anymore. Why did it always have to go straight to the fight. Bob wondered.<br /><br />&ldquo;You&rsquo;ve always cared about me?&nbsp;&nbsp;Are you fucking kidding me? If you cared so fucking much then tell me one thing DAD. Tell me why, when I needed you the most, why did you turn your back on me and send me into exile?&rdquo; Why, why had he after two years said that?<br /><br />&ldquo;Mark, I never did any such....&rdquo; his father started to defend himself against this onslaught.<br /><br />&ldquo;The FUCK you didn&rsquo;t, it&rsquo;s exactly what you did. Forced solitude isn&rsquo;t always the answer DAD,&rdquo; &lsquo;Shut up Mark, just shut up and walk away.&rsquo; his mind screamed at him.<br /><br />&ldquo;When my whole world was crashing down around me, when my heart was breaking and I felt like I was losing my mind did I get fatherly advice, or a mothers love and support? NO I got packed up and dumped in the middle of nowhere . When I needed you the most I ever had in my life, you pushed me away and left me alone, and MOM let you do it.&rdquo; Mark slammed the back of the Jeep closed and got back into the vehicle.<br /><br />&ldquo;Son I don&rsquo;t understand....&rdquo;<br /><br />&ldquo;No DAD, you don&rsquo;t understand, not now, not a year ago and for fucking sure not two years ago when I needed you and mom the most and you hauled my ass of to the mountains and dumped me at the cabin and left me there.&rdquo;&nbsp;&nbsp;Mark was barely able to contain himself as years of rage, anger, and heartbreak boiled at last to the surface. The pain as fresh as if it had happened just yesterday. Clawing and tearing at him as it had been ever since. As he fired up the Jeep and jammed it into reverse he leaned out the side..<br /><br />&ldquo;Fuck this, fuck you and fuck the world DAD! You don&rsquo;t get it at all, don&rsquo;t get me at all. I doubt you even have a clue what I&rsquo;m talking about so here, I&rsquo;ll give you a clue, Charleen.......&rdquo;<br /><br />It was all he could say, as soon as he spoke her name he was unable to utter another sound.<br />He tore out of the drive into the street jamming the gear shift into drive and flooring the Jeep as he sped out of the neighborhood he had grown up in. Tearing through Winter creek in a blind rage of emotions that he thought he had buried and forgotten.<br /><br />Bob Jameson stood there his mouth agape as the tears began well up in his eyes. Unconsciously he brought his hand up to cover his mouth as he began to weep. Had he actually been wrong in thinking that he was doing the right thing back then by giving his son the space and time to deal with his emotions. Had his actions caused this change in his son.<br /><br />As he stood there trying to sort things out his wife Alice came out of the house and as she walked up beside her husband asked, &ldquo;What was he so mad about this time?&rdquo; As he turned towards her she suddenly say the pain and anguish in his eyes, but before she could ask what was wrong he quietly said, &ldquo;Charleen.&rdquo;<br /><br /><div class='align_center'>============</div><br /><br />The drive from town to the cabin hadn&rsquo;t lessened his emotions at all. Mark switched off the jeep and bailed out heading straight for the small shed behind the cabin. Jerking open the door he grabbed the pack hanging on the inside of it that he always kept packed and ready to go. Reaching in he grabbed the handles of the dark green gear bag laying on the floor and hoisted it out as he slammed the door shut. Jamming his arms through the straps of the pack and pulling it into place across his shoulders he picked up the gear bag and set out to the Northeast towards&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Mount Bierstadt.<br /><br />Mark saw very little of the scenery along the way his mind still a jumbled turmoil of memories and emotions as he hiked towards the mountain peak he had climbed almost a dozen times. He knew almost every inch of the fourteener in detail, same for Sawtooth since they were joined as part of the ridge. He knew the spot he was headed to even better, he&rsquo;d always go there any time he climbed the area. Nice spot to reflect on life, and how much it sucked. He headed towards the south as he neared the base of Sawtooth and followed the hiking trail to the bend that would take him along the southern flank then turned off onto the tiny foot path that lead off to the north to the ridge line. Following the ridge he arrived at his chosen spot within ten minutes of reaching the crest line. He followed along the nearly unseen path that would lead him to his favorite perch, a small outcropping above the shear drop of the eastern face of Sawtooth. Lowering himself over the edge onto the outcropping he settled himself in and looked out over the valley before him.<br /><br />This place usually brought him a sense of peace, helped to calm his nerves and ease his troubled mind. But not today, not after the exchange with his dad a few hours ago. As he sat there the conversation came to his mind again unbidden. Even though he tried to stop it, smash it down, squash it from his mind and memory for ever, it was no use. He&rsquo;d never get it out, be rid of it. It would haunt him when he least expected it, torturing and tormenting him for the rest of his life.<br />Why? Why couldn&rsquo;t it stay buried in the past?<br /><br />He looked around and spotted the boulder that was his usual anchor point and walked over to it dropping his gear bag at his feet. Withdrawing the kevlar wrapped rope he tossed it over the big rock and secured it in place attaching the screw gate carabiner in place and looping his descent rope through it in a half hitch. Slipping into his harness and checking the straps and buckles he looked out over the valley again. He&rsquo;d have enough time to rappel the spot twice and free climb back up before the light started to give out. He attached the figure eight descender to his harness with another screw gate carabiner locking it in place and feeding his descent rope through it. Grabbing the kevlar mat from the bag he headed to the edge of the precipice and lay it in place before tossing the coil of the rap line over the edge. This was the best spot for rapping since there was a small outcropping that made an excellent foot holed four feet below the edge. He fed out the line to give him enough slack to reach it then dropped over the edge landing both feet on the outcrop easily. Making sure his friction mat was under the rope and checking everything one last time he was ready.&nbsp;&nbsp;He pushed off the rock face letting about 8 feet of rope zip through the descender before gripping the rope again as he swung back toward the rock face. He repeated this several times until he came to the second outcropping about 100 feet from the top. This one was larger and jutted out a good ten feet from the main face of the drop and from here down it would be a free fall to the bottom as he wouldn&rsquo;t be close to the rock face again until the last forty or fifty feet. He stood at the edge slowly paying out rope as he leaned backward until he was in a horizontal position then he slid his feet off the overhang letting himself slide down the rope about three feet before halting his descent again clearing the overhang cleanly.<br /><br />Most of the people Mark used to rappel with didn&rsquo;t really like free falls, he loved them and always tried to find areas that had at least one in the decent, even if it was a short one. That&rsquo;s what drew him to this spot, a single free fall that was almost seven hundred feet. After letting himself descend about thirty feet below the outcrop he tied off his decent line, just hanging there taking in the view across the valley. As far as a view he loved this time of year to be on the rocks, although the deciduous trees in this area were generally sparse at best and were primarily Narrowleaf Pine and Quaking Aspen there were quite a few visible in this particular area because of the proximity of the valley below. Their color change in the fall a stark contrast to the greens of the various pines, firs, spruces and cedars that were predominate in the mountains. With the cooling temperatures common for late September they had began to change adding splashes of color to the green expanse below. Mark lowered himself another fifty feet again tieing off the descent rope. Then pulling a sling from the pocket of his pack he looped it around his back and tied it to the rope and lay back against it to rest his arms as he took in the scenery around him again. He closed his eyes and let his mind wander for a bit thinking about the first time he had seen this cliff. It had been eight years ago last month. Early July of 2004. This was one of those things he usually tried to keep from coming to mind, he didn&rsquo;t know why, maybe because of the talk with Jamal earlier today, but this time he just let the memories come.<br /><br /><div class='align_center'>============</div><br /><br /><em>He and Debbie Conners had been officially handfasted, mated to each other, for a couple of weeks and had been left to their own devices at his families cabin, the very cabin he now resided in full time in fact. They were truly like a couple of kids in a candy store. But because they were both wiccan and were bound as a couple, considered all but married to each other, the candy was each others bodies and they were eating all they could stand. They had some rough spots in the beginning but had managed to survive even the worst ordeal of all, Debbie being kidnaped by an ex-lover who attempted to rape her. Mark had tracked them down and saved her from the guy. That was the primary reason their parents had\\d brought them to the cabin to be left alone by everyone so they could get past their ordeal and be a happy couple. They had gotten up one morning and put on clothes, which they didn&rsquo;t do very often while they were at the cabin, and decided to go explore the surrounding woods and mountain peaks. Marks family had hiked all of them several times and he wanted to show his love the beauty of the valley. They had come across this cliff and he memorized the area. He&rsquo;d come here many times and rappeled this cliff over the years, sometimes alone, sometimes with friends and more then once with a lover. He and Debbie had, almost a year later during the time they had been mated rappeled over this very spot and while suspended over 500 feet above the ground made love in a sling rig he had improvised on the spur of the moment. His memories of that encounter flooded his mind now and he smiled, something he rarely did these days, as vivid images of their coupling high above the ground played in his mind like a movie. That had been some of the most intense sex he&rsquo;d ever had with anyone and it still ranked pretty high on the list.</em><br /><br /><div class='align_center'>===========</div><br /><br />A shift in the wind roused him from his revery, blinking he realized the sun had dropped lower in the sky then he had expected. He&rsquo;d only have time for the one rappel but he&rsquo;d have to hike back to the top to get his gear and head home. Though the trip down that side street along memory lane had felt.....good. Something he thought for such a long time he&rsquo;d never feel again. Maybe, just maybe Jamal was right, maybe there were memories worth keeping, maybe there was a tiny sliver of hope that he could some day be happy again.<br /><br />&ldquo;Well, either way it&rsquo;s time to get down off this rock.&rdquo; he said to himself.<br />&nbsp;Mark untied the sling stowing it back into his pack and stretching a bit before he continued his descent. Untiing the locking knots he jerked the cinch hitch out and slid slightly as his weight returned to the line. Loosening his grip slightly he let the rope slide smoothly through the figure eight descender lowering him self in a controlled free fall stopping every forty feet or so to avoid rope burns.<br /><br />As he descended he thought about how he hadn&rsquo;t done any climbing or rappeling in almost a year and realized he missed it.&nbsp;&nbsp;Sooner then he thought, even sooner the he would have liked, he found himself standing on solid ground again looking back up the cliff face. He had let his demons rule his life for too long, Jamal was right it was time for him to face them and get on with his life. But he wondered, did he even have the strength to do it now? Would it really be worth the inevitable pain from dealing with them once and for all to make it to the other side? What would happen if, in releasing them from the prison of his mind to deal with them, they finally won the struggle and over took him? Almost everyday at the curve in the road he had attempted to just drive over the cliff and end it all, but every time he had stopped himself at the last second, jerking the Jeep back onto the road and continued on. That was exactly what he had been doing every waking moment for the last three years, continuing on, hour by hour, day by day, for three long years. Yet he had tried so many times in the last few months to end it, to end the pain, the suffering, the torture he imposed on himself. Much like he had imposed this exile on himself, trying to ........what? Escape? No, to hide, he realized it at last, he was hiding from his demons, from the world, but most of all from himself. He&rsquo;d known it all along, but until now he refused to admit it, or even to allow himself to think it. Yes, it was time to start facing those demons, win or lose it was time to do what he should have done back then. He turned towards the trail that would lead him back to the top of the ridge his mind made up that he was as ready as he&rsquo;d ever be, he just hoped he had the strength for it.</span>",
  "pools_count": 4,
  "title": "Seven Peaks - Chapter 1",
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