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Please forgive me about writing mistakes. My English wasn't so good back then when I wrote this.", "count": "11", "submission_left_submission_id": "1028773", "submission_left_file_name": "1416230_NeiNing_out_of_his_shadow_-_chapter_5.rtf", "submission_right_submission_id": "1083653", "submission_right_file_name": "1498787_NeiNing_out_of_his_shadow_chapter_7.rtf" } ], "description": "Fic about Shredder Raph x Leonardo.\nIf I have forgot to add some keywords, suggest them freely! It has been so long when I have read this story so I don't remember what there happens etc. so I might have miss some keywords.", "description_bbcode_parsed": "Fic about Shredder Raph x Leonardo.
If I have forgot to add some keywords, suggest them freely! It has been so long when I have read this story so I don't remember what there happens etc. so I might have miss some keywords.", "writing": "Chapter 6\n\nDon and Mike sat on Leo's bed watching their oldest brother walking back and forth in front of them.\n\n\"Dude, would you stop that? You make me dizzy.\"\n\n\"I can't believe Raph was behind ALL of this the last 10 years! Why the hell he didn't came back home or at least sent us a letter or... or something! To let us know he took Shredder's place!\"\n\n\"Your reaction tells it why he didn't do it.\"\n\nLeonardo stopped looking at his second youngest brother who's olive green skin shined under the ceiling light.\n\n\"Care to explain what you just said?\"\n\n\"Look at yourself, Leo. You're pissed and Raph knew you would react like this if he would had told you. You would not have accept it... and neither Master but we must accept the fact this is the path what Raph has choose. All we can do is to be there, support him and make sure he won't go do anything stupid.\"\n\n\"But he already has done stupid things what cannot be undone! He sent me to Japan to kill all those innocent people! He threw Miya off on the roof and who knows what else he has done while we weren't here!\"\n\n\"I hear you, Leo, don't yell.\" Donatello signed as he moved a bit making himself more comfortable. \"You still must accept that what has happened. Nothing can't change it and you have to learn to live with it.\"\n\n\"And to be honest, bro, you and Raph always have had your argues and stuff so it's no wonder Raph didn't trust on you enough to tell you back then. You guys would had end up having another stupid argue.\"\n\nLeo stood there silently taking looks at his brothers in turn, finally releasing that long sigh what he held back.\n\n\"I know what you guys mean but still... I just... I thought I knew him. I thought I knew how he acts and thinks but I was wrong.\"\n\n\"I don't think you were wrong. Some people just change over the years. That's what happened to our brother. He changed, his thinking and acting ways changed.\"\n\n\"So what do we do now?\" Mike asked looking his big brothers.\n\n\"I suggest we keep on going as good as we can.\"\n\n\"Submit to his will? Do whatever he tells us to do?\"\n\n\"Perhaps, but we also should try to spend more time with him to get the bond back what we once shared. He has been too long without us. And specially you, Leonardo. I think it would mean so much to him if he could trust on you like he could years and years ago.\"\nLeo's mind was analyzing Don's words when Goro came in after knocking.\n\n\"Master Shredder wants to see you, Leonardo.\"\n\n\"If he's going to give me another task and make me kill more people, tell him he can go do it on his own. I won't spill any more innocent blood and cover my hands with it.\"\n\n\"I have no idea what he wants. He just said he wants you there. I recommend you to come with me.\"\n\nLeonardo looked his little brothers who both nodded to him once, making Leo nod to Goro, agreeing to go with him to see Raphael. Door closed behind him as he stood still, his eyes nailed on Raphael's back who didn't bother to turn around.\n\n\"I know you hate me for that what I did.\"\n\n\"Hate is too slight word to it what I feel currently.\"\n\n\"You must understand I had no other way.\"\n\n\"Bullshit!\"\n\nWith one single and strong kick Leo leaped across the room right behind Raphael who easily dodged Leo's fist jumping sideways away from his brother but Leonardo's speed was something what none couldn't beat and so he was right in front of Raphael in a blink of an eye, pushing Raphael against the wall snarling.\n\n\"I don't understand! You could have decide other way! Why the hell you made me kill all those people related to master Yoshi?! Yoshi was our master's master! He had done absolutely NOTHING to us, nor his family! SO WHY!?\"\n\nSlamming Leo's hands off on him Raph stood more straight, fire burning in his eyes.\n\n\"Don't push your luck too far with me, brother! You bossed me around in that stinky lair and sewer but up here I'm in charge. You would be wise to remember that.\"\n\n\"Just answer. I need to know why! I can't stop thinking it!\"\n\nThey both kept their sparking eyes locked on each other for minutes in perfect silence.\n\n\".. I always hated it how you kept bossing me around. How you stopped trusting me. If something went wrong it was always my fault. I felt you always looked down at me while I looked up at you.\" Raphael sighed as he gave his back to his brother. \"I admired you, always did when we were kids but the more older we grew the more I started to hate you.\"\n\n\"So this all is now some sort of pay back, huh?\"\n\n\"No.\"\n\nSilence landed in the room as rain drops slowly started to hit this huge glass in front of Raphael who kept his gaze down at the city where life never stopped moving forward.\n\n\"All those times when I argued with you, fought with you, disobey you, all that... I tried to make you hate me.\"\n\nLeo saw how reflection of Raph's face turned slightly more sad but Leo remained at his spot, waiting his brother to continue, but he didn't.\n\n\"Why? Why you wanted me to hate you? You know I love you. You're my brother.\"\n\n\"Because over the years my brotherly love toward you... Grew to something else. Every nasty word, angry glare, blame, fight and all that from you hurt me, tore my heart more and more open. I couldn't stand it.\"\n\nRaphael's expression turned so cold and fierce as he turned to look Leo's reflection on the window while Leo kept his eyes on Raph's reflection.\n\n\"That's why I started to be mean back to you. To make you hate me more, hoping your hate toward me would make me stop loving you the way how I did! Bullshit! It didn't work! Then that night came and fight against foot and Shredder on the roof... When Shredder died I saw my chance. Chance to get away from you and kill these damn emotions.\"\n\nLeo listened silently reading Raph's expression so clearly and while he listened, he started to understand Raph's point but he still couldn't accept it.\n\n\"What about Master Yoshi mission?\"\n\n\"Another way to make you hate me more and help me kill this warm feeling from my chest. Fuck, Leo, this feeling is annoying and it won't leave me alone! It's still there even after these 10 years what we were apart!\" Raphael spun around on his heels, his gaze freezing on Leo. \"You have no idea how many years I have been cursing this feeling! I just want to get riddle of it since I know you would never accept this feeling from me or from anyone! You would keep your tight mind closed from this fact, telling me to drop it and how wrong it would be! I... I wanted to tell this to you when we were teens. I wanted to tell you I loved you but...\"\n\nRaph's head lowered itself gaze turning on the floor as Leo took a step closer, still keeping his hands to himself.\n\n\"You just were too afraid? That I would judge you?\"\n\n\"I was scared of everything. You rejecting me, Don and Mike finding me and my feelings disgusting and master Splinter would have found it very disturbing since it would had not been 'normal'. He most surely would had send me away if he knew.\"\n\nLeo remained silent as he rolled Raph's words in his head, slowly starting to get more and more clear point of how Raphael was feeling, what he was thinking, what he wanted but couldn't have.\n\n\"You can go but keep this conversation between us. Others don't need to know what happens inside these walls.\"\n\n\"As you wish.\" Leo bowed slightly making his leave when Raphael's voice stopped him.\n\n\"By the way, Leonardo, for now on you will be my number one general.\"\n\n\"General? Don't you have any foot or elite ninjas for that job?\"\n\n\"I have many good ninjas but none of them can't reach your level.\"\n\nLeo listened silently as Raphael made his point clear before leaving his 'master' behind alone in the room. Walking forward on this long hallway Leo's chest felt so heavy as Raphael's words kept going on in his head over and over again and that sad look on his face. So Raph had loved him more than as a brother last 20 years at least, never saying a thing and he had done all those horrible things to make Leo hate him, helping him to kill that love with his evil words.\n\nLeo halted looking down at his feet sighing. He thought he would had feel angry toward Raph about all those horrible things what he had make Leo do and go through but instead Leo felt bad for him. Knowing his little brother never hadn't trust him enough to tell him the truth, fearing his reaction... Had he really been that bad big brother that his little brothers feared him? Feared opening up to him?\n\nThis wouldn't do. He didn't want his brothers to feel like that toward him. It would change, Leo would make sure of it. For this day on his brothers could trust on him as they did in their childhood. Even if Leo wasn't their team's leader anymore, he still would be there for them all.\n\n--\n\nDays turned weeks, weeks turned months and months turned a year. This year had been difficult time to them all, still learning to live under Raphael's commands and Raphael balancing between leadership and brotherhood. Raphael had done some changes, specially about himself and his outlook. He had abandon Shredder's armor and he now was wearing long red scarf around his neck, he had foot icon tattooed on his right shoulder, arm wrapped in bandages, having little metal foot shaped shield on his elbow with little whip and wrist warmer around his wrist which also had red foot mark on it. Left arm was also wrapped with bandages, having same shield on his left elbow but he had long metal glove with spikes and 2 longer spikes at the end which were deadly weapon. Raphael knew how to use them. His upper body was naked but he had small scar on his left shoulder, wide belt nicely being on his waist. His small 'cape' from waist to behind his calves was made from leather belts and front side was covered with red long and ripped fabric. Of course he had small black pants under it. His legs were tied with bandages from half way of his thighs and he wore red-black knee his booths with 3 red fabric stripes, black leather belts going around his ankles.\n\nLeo stood by his master as his general, looking his brother who had grow up to be tallest of them with most muscular body. Despite the fact Raphael was now new Shredder, he still was training and keeping his body in shape. His eyes stayed on his foot soldiers who were training under Mikey's commands who still was teacher of martial arts and Raphael seemed to be pleased about their progress even that he said nothing or smiled but Leo could feel it.\n\n\"Foot ninjas. Dismiss.\"\n\nThey all left leaving Raphael, Leonardo and Michelangelo all alone in training room. Throwing towel on his shoulder and taking long sip of water from his bottle Mikey made his way to his brothers, smiling.\n\n\"What's up? Looks good, eh?\"\n\n\"Don't get ahead of yourself. You have train them well but tonight we will test it just how good they have become.\"\n\n\"What do you mean?\"\n\n\"I heard Hun's going to betray us and we won't look that between our fingers. He will pay dearly. Let your students rest now but inform them to be ready at midnight. We will head out then and attack Hun.\"\n\n\"Do I have to come too?\"\n\n\"They are your students so of course.\"\n\nRaph turned to look his general from the corner of his eye, seeing this cold and stern look on Leo's face. He had no clue what had happen to Leo but he slowly and surely had started to become like this around him. Maybe Leo had decided to stop be nice to him in order to stop fueling Raphael's love toward Leo. It might had been more effective way than hurtful words but no, hot head's heart was still beating for his oldest brother but he kept it hidden.\n\n\"You can leave, Michelangelo. I have one thing to do with general Leonardo here.\"\n\nThis confused Mike a bit, making Leo look at his master from the corner of his eye but his expression remained the same. Cold and steady. Rubbing his head Mike agreed and left, closing training hall's doors. Stepping firmly away from his general, Raphael made his way to center of the room turning to face Leonardo who kept his cold gaze on him.\n\nTaking sais in his hands Raphael stood more firmly on his spot. \"Take hold of your katanas and fight me. Don't hold back. Show me what you have become. I need to see you're in shape to go out with us tonight and fight. Even kill if needed.\"\n\nWithout a sound Leo raised his left hand over his head to his back, taking hold of his sword as his right had had made it's way behind his lower back, slowly pulling his shining blades next to his body and this made Raphael smirk.\n\n\"Good. Now come! Fight like if you would like to kill me!\"\n\nLeo nodded once as he launched himself toward Raphael who took Leo's attack head on, finding it to be very pleasing how Leo was not holding back. Spinning around side way allowed Raphael to free himself from Leo's pressure and flash from the corner of his eyes warned him about Leo's approaching katana which went next to his head. Leonardo made no sound as he kept attacking his brother over and over again, feeling how his anger toward him grew. Despite all this time, Leo hadn't forgive or forgot that what Raphael did... In the name of love as he had understood it.\n\nCharging after his emerald green brother Leo put more and more pressure on Raphael who easily kept up with him and this made Leo smile in his mind. At least Raphael's fighting skills had improve a lot. He had become quite skilled so Leo decided to increase his speed which was one of his best weapons and it had instant effect. Raphael no longer was able to keep up with his brother so good. Stepping backward while dodging another attack, Raphael step on one nunchuck what had been left on the floor and he lost his balance seeing Leo's shining blade coming toward him. There simply was no way he would had been able to dodge it or Leo stop his attack so that sharp blade sank in Raphael's left shoulder on his old scar and made it's way over his chest to his right side. Sais fell on this wooden floor from his hold as his painful scream filled the room, his carapace slamming hard against the floor. Leo stopped as he watched how his brother rolled on his side holding his deep and badly bleeding cut cursing silently.\n\nLeo dropped his katanas on the floor as he walked over to Raphael trying to see how bad the wound was but he already knew it to be quite bad since there started to be big pond of blood on the floor.\n\n\"Master. I'm sorry. I couldn't stop myself...\"\n\n\"S-shut up, general. G-go get medic...\"\n\n\"And leave you alone here? You have order me to stay by your side.\"\n\n\"Can't you at least ONCE do as I ask you to do?! Or do you wanna stay by my side and watch me bleed to death?!\" Raphael growled a bit before short laugh escaped from his lips. \"But you would love that... Wouldn't you?\"\n\n\"No, I wouldn't. Stay here, I come back soon.\"\n\n\"Hng, like I'm g-gonna run away.\"\n\nLeo stood up and left, walking out of the room fast to nearest device on the wall pressing few buttons, calling to Don who didn't had time to say anything when Leo already was telling him why he was calling.\n\n\"I need you in Mike's training hall. Master Shredder is hurt badly.\"\n\n\"O-okay, what kind of injure it is so I know to take right stuff with me.\"\n\n\"Just long and deep cut from my katana what goes from his left shoulder over to his chest to his right side. He has lost blood a lot already so I would hurry if I were you.\"\n\nLeo hang up before Don had chance to reply and it made Don sad and worried. Leo indeed had become so cold lately... Leo was still there to his younger brothers, yes, but it had been so long when Leo had relax or laugh, or even smiled, to them or with them. Don stood up taking his first aid kit bag rushing to training hall as fast as he could, finding Raphael laying on his side Leo knelt by his side.\n\n\"Make way, Leo.\"\n\n\"It's general, Donatello.\"\n\nDonatello raised is brow snapping right back to his oldest brother. \"It's doctor Donatello to you... General.\"\n\nLeo raised is brow in unamused way but Raphael's grow made them stop before it escalated too far.\n\n\"S-shut up, both of you!\" Those golden eyes turned to meet Don's black orbs with slight sign of pain in them. \"Do your job, doc.\"\n\n\"I will but you need to turn on your back. I try to be as fast and gentle as possible.\"\n\nLeonardo helped Don to turn Raphael on his carapace who let his hands lay relaxed next to his body's sides allowing Don to have better view. Don checked his brother's wound carefully and smiled in relief noticing it wasn't life threatening.\n\n\"Good news, master. Despite the fact you have lost a lot of blood, this wound isn't deadly. I can fix you up but I also order you to stay in bed at least a week for the start. We don't want your wound to open up after I have fix it.\"\n\n\"Me, in bed for a week?! Are you kidding me?! There's no way I'll -- AAAGGH!\"\n\nDon pressed wet cotton pad hard against that strong shoulder purposely, traveling it along the wound, to shut his brother up and cleaning his wound.\n\n\"I know you hate it, master, but I'm the doctor here and you should do as I say. I have other things to do that be fixing you after every hour since you refuse to listen to me and stay in bed.\"\n\n\"I have a mission to do tonight!\"\n\n\"I'm sorry, but that has to wait.\"\n\nRaphael rested his head against hard floor mumbling something to himself with angry tone as Don kept placing more cotton pads on the wound in line, taping them on the wound before he ordered Leo to help Raphael sit so Don could wrap bandage around his body to make sure no dirty would go in the wound and those pads would still on their place just in case if those tapes decided to come off.\n\nAfter 3th roll of bandage Don was finally ready watching Raph slowly standing up.\n\n\"Do you need pain killers, hot-head?\"\n\nAngry glare from Raph's eyes gave Don unpleasing feeling but he wasn't going to worship Raphael. He was talking and treating him as his brother, in the way how he always had. Just because Raph now was 'the Shredder'... It didn't change Raphael in Donatello's eyes. They were still brothers and he was going on with that.\n\n\"You don't need to give me those glares, Raphael. You are my brother and I treat you like one.\"\n\nRaphael snorted as he turned to look his sais on the floor but he couldn't bend down to get them so Leonardo soon was by his side, picked up Raph's weapons giving them to him. Leonardo expected to be hit by Raph but he just snorted a bit.\n\n\"That was good cut, general. If you would had have more force and closer distant, you could have cut me in half. You indeed are deadly one.\"\n\nLeo bowed a bit with his head, being all calm and cool.\n\n\"Thank you, master. Thought I try to be more careful for now on.\"\n\n\"Don't be.\"\n\nLeonardo watched after his brother who slowly, with trembling feet, started to make his way out of the room before following him, coming to walk right by his side and give Raph support if he was going to faint and fall because of blood lost. Don watched after his brothers wondering what had happened between them. Were they really okay with this master-general thing? Raphael was strict, mean and scary at times while giving commands but he also had show his old gentle side... at least to Donnie when they had been alone in his lab talking late at night. But then there was Leonardo who had become so cold... Had his role as general change him so much?\n\nLifting first aid kit in his arms Don shook his head, not wanting it to be the reason. Other reason would be all those killings what Leo had done 11 years ago but why they would effect on him only now? That didn't make any sense.\n\n--\n\nRaphael sat on his bed sighing deeply as Leo stood next to door, keeping his hands crossed over his chest.\n\n\"What do we do about tonight's mission, master?\"\n\nRaphael's golden eyes rose to meet Leo's eye, lowering back in to his lap as he thought about it.\n\n\"We can't abort it if Hun really is going to betray us. But I can't go out and fight... so there's only one option. You will be in charge of that mission, Leonardo.\"\n\n\"Are you sure about that? Wouldn't Goro be better choice? He have done missions much more than I have, Master Shredder.\"\n\n\"Raph. Call me Raph or Raphael when we are alone. And what comes to Goro, he's not here currently. Sent him and 3 other elites to train in special training place. You are my right hand and I trust you.\"\n\n\"But why?\"\n\n\"Ugh, do we have to go through this talking AGAIN? How many times I need to tell you, Mike and Don are my brothers and I want us to stay as brothers but I can't treat you like my bros when there's others around. That's why I try to spend time alone with all of you so that we could be normally. Like in the old days. We're family. I trust all of you and I wish you guys could return that trust.\"\n\n\"....\"\n\n\"I know it's hard for you to trust me but I still have hopes. But anyway if you think you can't or don't want to lead that mission, I will ask Don to do it. He can make plans and Mike can have his men ready to kick those idiots asses.\"\n\n\"No. No need to bother Donatello. I will do it, Sh--- Raph.\"\n\n\"So you trust me?\"\n\n\"Have I ever said I wouldn't?\"\n\nLeft side of Raph's mouth turned up as he smiled half way closing his eyes. \"So you acting all cold and stuff hasn't had anything to do with it what happened 11 years ago.\"\n\n\"No.\"\n\n\"Then what it is?\"\n\nThose golden eyes were slightly commanding, curious, forcing and yet gentle and waiting as he scanned Leo's stone face but he saw slight hint of red crawling on his brother's cheeks.\n\n\"You can talk to me, Leonardo. Like always, everything what we talk about will stay inside these walls.\"\n\nLeo shook his head managing to push that blush off on his cheeks.\n\n\"I know all that but it honestly isn't anything so serious or what we should talk about right now. Instead we should focus on the mission. You have a plan what to do and map?\"\n\n\"Map's on the table over there.\" Raphael pointed toward this wide and big wooden table when Leo walked toward it, seeing huge map of the area where the ambush was set. Rolling that map in his hands and coming back to Raphael's big bed, Leo spread map in their laps sitting as close to Raph as possible to see all what he had to see.\n\n\"Tell me everything.\"\n\nRaphael's finger started to traveled on that rustling paper when he clearly explained Leonardo his plan who kept nodding as a sign of understatement.\n\n\"You got this all, general?\" He smirked to his brother. \"Kill all those who needs to be killed but I would appreciate it if you could bring Hun to me alive. If not... He's all yours. I have full trust on you. You know what to do.\"\n\n\"Yes, master. Leave everything to me.\" \n\nTBC....", "writing_bbcode_parsed": "Chapter 6

Don and Mike sat on Leo's bed watching their oldest brother walking back and forth in front of them.

"Dude, would you stop that? You make me dizzy."

"I can't believe Raph was behind ALL of this the last 10 years! Why the hell he didn't came back home or at least sent us a letter or... or something! To let us know he took Shredder's place!"

"Your reaction tells it why he didn't do it."

Leonardo stopped looking at his second youngest brother who's olive green skin shined under the ceiling light.

"Care to explain what you just said?"

"Look at yourself, Leo. You're pissed and Raph knew you would react like this if he would had told you. You would not have accept it... and neither Master but we must accept the fact this is the path what Raph has choose. All we can do is to be there, support him and make sure he won't go do anything stupid."

"But he already has done stupid things what cannot be undone! He sent me to Japan to kill all those innocent people! He threw Miya off on the roof and who knows what else he has done while we weren't here!"

"I hear you, Leo, don't yell." Donatello signed as he moved a bit making himself more comfortable. "You still must accept that what has happened. Nothing can't change it and you have to learn to live with it."

"And to be honest, bro, you and Raph always have had your argues and stuff so it's no wonder Raph didn't trust on you enough to tell you back then. You guys would had end up having another stupid argue."

Leo stood there silently taking looks at his brothers in turn, finally releasing that long sigh what he held back.

"I know what you guys mean but still... I just... I thought I knew him. I thought I knew how he acts and thinks but I was wrong."

"I don't think you were wrong. Some people just change over the years. That's what happened to our brother. He changed, his thinking and acting ways changed."

"So what do we do now?" Mike asked looking his big brothers.

"I suggest we keep on going as good as we can."

"Submit to his will? Do whatever he tells us to do?"

"Perhaps, but we also should try to spend more time with him to get the bond back what we once shared. He has been too long without us. And specially you, Leonardo. I think it would mean so much to him if he could trust on you like he could years and years ago."
Leo's mind was analyzing Don's words when Goro came in after knocking.

"Master Shredder wants to see you, Leonardo."

"If he's going to give me another task and make me kill more people, tell him he can go do it on his own. I won't spill any more innocent blood and cover my hands with it."

"I have no idea what he wants. He just said he wants you there. I recommend you to come with me."

Leonardo looked his little brothers who both nodded to him once, making Leo nod to Goro, agreeing to go with him to see Raphael. Door closed behind him as he stood still, his eyes nailed on Raphael's back who didn't bother to turn around.

"I know you hate me for that what I did."

"Hate is too slight word to it what I feel currently."

"You must understand I had no other way."

"Bullshit!"

With one single and strong kick Leo leaped across the room right behind Raphael who easily dodged Leo's fist jumping sideways away from his brother but Leonardo's speed was something what none couldn't beat and so he was right in front of Raphael in a blink of an eye, pushing Raphael against the wall snarling.

"I don't understand! You could have decide other way! Why the hell you made me kill all those people related to master Yoshi?! Yoshi was our master's master! He had done absolutely NOTHING to us, nor his family! SO WHY!?"

Slamming Leo's hands off on him Raph stood more straight, fire burning in his eyes.

"Don't push your luck too far with me, brother! You bossed me around in that stinky lair and sewer but up here I'm in charge. You would be wise to remember that."

"Just answer. I need to know why! I can't stop thinking it!"

They both kept their sparking eyes locked on each other for minutes in perfect silence.

".. I always hated it how you kept bossing me around. How you stopped trusting me. If something went wrong it was always my fault. I felt you always looked down at me while I looked up at you." Raphael sighed as he gave his back to his brother. "I admired you, always did when we were kids but the more older we grew the more I started to hate you."

"So this all is now some sort of pay back, huh?"

"No."

Silence landed in the room as rain drops slowly started to hit this huge glass in front of Raphael who kept his gaze down at the city where life never stopped moving forward.

"All those times when I argued with you, fought with you, disobey you, all that... I tried to make you hate me."

Leo saw how reflection of Raph's face turned slightly more sad but Leo remained at his spot, waiting his brother to continue, but he didn't.

"Why? Why you wanted me to hate you? You know I love you. You're my brother."

"Because over the years my brotherly love toward you... Grew to something else. Every nasty word, angry glare, blame, fight and all that from you hurt me, tore my heart more and more open. I couldn't stand it."

Raphael's expression turned so cold and fierce as he turned to look Leo's reflection on the window while Leo kept his eyes on Raph's reflection.

"That's why I started to be mean back to you. To make you hate me more, hoping your hate toward me would make me stop loving you the way how I did! Bullshit! It didn't work! Then that night came and fight against foot and Shredder on the roof... When Shredder died I saw my chance. Chance to get away from you and kill these damn emotions."

Leo listened silently reading Raph's expression so clearly and while he listened, he started to understand Raph's point but he still couldn't accept it.

"What about Master Yoshi mission?"

"Another way to make you hate me more and help me kill this warm feeling from my chest. Fuck, Leo, this feeling is annoying and it won't leave me alone! It's still there even after these 10 years what we were apart!" Raphael spun around on his heels, his gaze freezing on Leo. "You have no idea how many years I have been cursing this feeling! I just want to get riddle of it since I know you would never accept this feeling from me or from anyone! You would keep your tight mind closed from this fact, telling me to drop it and how wrong it would be! I... I wanted to tell this to you when we were teens. I wanted to tell you I loved you but..."

Raph's head lowered itself gaze turning on the floor as Leo took a step closer, still keeping his hands to himself.

"You just were too afraid? That I would judge you?"

"I was scared of everything. You rejecting me, Don and Mike finding me and my feelings disgusting and master Splinter would have found it very disturbing since it would had not been 'normal'. He most surely would had send me away if he knew."

Leo remained silent as he rolled Raph's words in his head, slowly starting to get more and more clear point of how Raphael was feeling, what he was thinking, what he wanted but couldn't have.

"You can go but keep this conversation between us. Others don't need to know what happens inside these walls."

"As you wish." Leo bowed slightly making his leave when Raphael's voice stopped him.

"By the way, Leonardo, for now on you will be my number one general."

"General? Don't you have any foot or elite ninjas for that job?"

"I have many good ninjas but none of them can't reach your level."

Leo listened silently as Raphael made his point clear before leaving his 'master' behind alone in the room. Walking forward on this long hallway Leo's chest felt so heavy as Raphael's words kept going on in his head over and over again and that sad look on his face. So Raph had loved him more than as a brother last 20 years at least, never saying a thing and he had done all those horrible things to make Leo hate him, helping him to kill that love with his evil words.

Leo halted looking down at his feet sighing. He thought he would had feel angry toward Raph about all those horrible things what he had make Leo do and go through but instead Leo felt bad for him. Knowing his little brother never hadn't trust him enough to tell him the truth, fearing his reaction... Had he really been that bad big brother that his little brothers feared him? Feared opening up to him?

This wouldn't do. He didn't want his brothers to feel like that toward him. It would change, Leo would make sure of it. For this day on his brothers could trust on him as they did in their childhood. Even if Leo wasn't their team's leader anymore, he still would be there for them all.

--

Days turned weeks, weeks turned months and months turned a year. This year had been difficult time to them all, still learning to live under Raphael's commands and Raphael balancing between leadership and brotherhood. Raphael had done some changes, specially about himself and his outlook. He had abandon Shredder's armor and he now was wearing long red scarf around his neck, he had foot icon tattooed on his right shoulder, arm wrapped in bandages, having little metal foot shaped shield on his elbow with little whip and wrist warmer around his wrist which also had red foot mark on it. Left arm was also wrapped with bandages, having same shield on his left elbow but he had long metal glove with spikes and 2 longer spikes at the end which were deadly weapon. Raphael knew how to use them. His upper body was naked but he had small scar on his left shoulder, wide belt nicely being on his waist. His small 'cape' from waist to behind his calves was made from leather belts and front side was covered with red long and ripped fabric. Of course he had small black pants under it. His legs were tied with bandages from half way of his thighs and he wore red-black knee his booths with 3 red fabric stripes, black leather belts going around his ankles.

Leo stood by his master as his general, looking his brother who had grow up to be tallest of them with most muscular body. Despite the fact Raphael was now new Shredder, he still was training and keeping his body in shape. His eyes stayed on his foot soldiers who were training under Mikey's commands who still was teacher of martial arts and Raphael seemed to be pleased about their progress even that he said nothing or smiled but Leo could feel it.

"Foot ninjas. Dismiss."

They all left leaving Raphael, Leonardo and Michelangelo all alone in training room. Throwing towel on his shoulder and taking long sip of water from his bottle Mikey made his way to his brothers, smiling.

"What's up? Looks good, eh?"

"Don't get ahead of yourself. You have train them well but tonight we will test it just how good they have become."

"What do you mean?"

"I heard Hun's going to betray us and we won't look that between our fingers. He will pay dearly. Let your students rest now but inform them to be ready at midnight. We will head out then and attack Hun."

"Do I have to come too?"

"They are your students so of course."

Raph turned to look his general from the corner of his eye, seeing this cold and stern look on Leo's face. He had no clue what had happen to Leo but he slowly and surely had started to become like this around him. Maybe Leo had decided to stop be nice to him in order to stop fueling Raphael's love toward Leo. It might had been more effective way than hurtful words but no, hot head's heart was still beating for his oldest brother but he kept it hidden.

"You can leave, Michelangelo. I have one thing to do with general Leonardo here."

This confused Mike a bit, making Leo look at his master from the corner of his eye but his expression remained the same. Cold and steady. Rubbing his head Mike agreed and left, closing training hall's doors. Stepping firmly away from his general, Raphael made his way to center of the room turning to face Leonardo who kept his cold gaze on him.

Taking sais in his hands Raphael stood more firmly on his spot. "Take hold of your katanas and fight me. Don't hold back. Show me what you have become. I need to see you're in shape to go out with us tonight and fight. Even kill if needed."

Without a sound Leo raised his left hand over his head to his back, taking hold of his sword as his right had had made it's way behind his lower back, slowly pulling his shining blades next to his body and this made Raphael smirk.

"Good. Now come! Fight like if you would like to kill me!"

Leo nodded once as he launched himself toward Raphael who took Leo's attack head on, finding it to be very pleasing how Leo was not holding back. Spinning around side way allowed Raphael to free himself from Leo's pressure and flash from the corner of his eyes warned him about Leo's approaching katana which went next to his head. Leonardo made no sound as he kept attacking his brother over and over again, feeling how his anger toward him grew. Despite all this time, Leo hadn't forgive or forgot that what Raphael did... In the name of love as he had understood it.

Charging after his emerald green brother Leo put more and more pressure on Raphael who easily kept up with him and this made Leo smile in his mind. At least Raphael's fighting skills had improve a lot. He had become quite skilled so Leo decided to increase his speed which was one of his best weapons and it had instant effect. Raphael no longer was able to keep up with his brother so good. Stepping backward while dodging another attack, Raphael step on one nunchuck what had been left on the floor and he lost his balance seeing Leo's shining blade coming toward him. There simply was no way he would had been able to dodge it or Leo stop his attack so that sharp blade sank in Raphael's left shoulder on his old scar and made it's way over his chest to his right side. Sais fell on this wooden floor from his hold as his painful scream filled the room, his carapace slamming hard against the floor. Leo stopped as he watched how his brother rolled on his side holding his deep and badly bleeding cut cursing silently.

Leo dropped his katanas on the floor as he walked over to Raphael trying to see how bad the wound was but he already knew it to be quite bad since there started to be big pond of blood on the floor.

"Master. I'm sorry. I couldn't stop myself..."

"S-shut up, general. G-go get medic..."

"And leave you alone here? You have order me to stay by your side."

"Can't you at least ONCE do as I ask you to do?! Or do you wanna stay by my side and watch me bleed to death?!" Raphael growled a bit before short laugh escaped from his lips. "But you would love that... Wouldn't you?"

"No, I wouldn't. Stay here, I come back soon."

"Hng, like I'm g-gonna run away."

Leo stood up and left, walking out of the room fast to nearest device on the wall pressing few buttons, calling to Don who didn't had time to say anything when Leo already was telling him why he was calling.

"I need you in Mike's training hall. Master Shredder is hurt badly."

"O-okay, what kind of injure it is so I know to take right stuff with me."

"Just long and deep cut from my katana what goes from his left shoulder over to his chest to his right side. He has lost blood a lot already so I would hurry if I were you."

Leo hang up before Don had chance to reply and it made Don sad and worried. Leo indeed had become so cold lately... Leo was still there to his younger brothers, yes, but it had been so long when Leo had relax or laugh, or even smiled, to them or with them. Don stood up taking his first aid kit bag rushing to training hall as fast as he could, finding Raphael laying on his side Leo knelt by his side.

"Make way, Leo."

"It's general, Donatello."

Donatello raised is brow snapping right back to his oldest brother. "It's doctor Donatello to you... General."

Leo raised is brow in unamused way but Raphael's grow made them stop before it escalated too far.

"S-shut up, both of you!" Those golden eyes turned to meet Don's black orbs with slight sign of pain in them. "Do your job, doc."

"I will but you need to turn on your back. I try to be as fast and gentle as possible."

Leonardo helped Don to turn Raphael on his carapace who let his hands lay relaxed next to his body's sides allowing Don to have better view. Don checked his brother's wound carefully and smiled in relief noticing it wasn't life threatening.

"Good news, master. Despite the fact you have lost a lot of blood, this wound isn't deadly. I can fix you up but I also order you to stay in bed at least a week for the start. We don't want your wound to open up after I have fix it."

"Me, in bed for a week?! Are you kidding me?! There's no way I'll -- AAAGGH!"

Don pressed wet cotton pad hard against that strong shoulder purposely, traveling it along the wound, to shut his brother up and cleaning his wound.

"I know you hate it, master, but I'm the doctor here and you should do as I say. I have other things to do that be fixing you after every hour since you refuse to listen to me and stay in bed."

"I have a mission to do tonight!"

"I'm sorry, but that has to wait."

Raphael rested his head against hard floor mumbling something to himself with angry tone as Don kept placing more cotton pads on the wound in line, taping them on the wound before he ordered Leo to help Raphael sit so Don could wrap bandage around his body to make sure no dirty would go in the wound and those pads would still on their place just in case if those tapes decided to come off.

After 3th roll of bandage Don was finally ready watching Raph slowly standing up.

"Do you need pain killers, hot-head?"

Angry glare from Raph's eyes gave Don unpleasing feeling but he wasn't going to worship Raphael. He was talking and treating him as his brother, in the way how he always had. Just because Raph now was 'the Shredder'... It didn't change Raphael in Donatello's eyes. They were still brothers and he was going on with that.

"You don't need to give me those glares, Raphael. You are my brother and I treat you like one."

Raphael snorted as he turned to look his sais on the floor but he couldn't bend down to get them so Leonardo soon was by his side, picked up Raph's weapons giving them to him. Leonardo expected to be hit by Raph but he just snorted a bit.

"That was good cut, general. If you would had have more force and closer distant, you could have cut me in half. You indeed are deadly one."

Leo bowed a bit with his head, being all calm and cool.

"Thank you, master. Thought I try to be more careful for now on."

"Don't be."

Leonardo watched after his brother who slowly, with trembling feet, started to make his way out of the room before following him, coming to walk right by his side and give Raph support if he was going to faint and fall because of blood lost. Don watched after his brothers wondering what had happened between them. Were they really okay with this master-general thing? Raphael was strict, mean and scary at times while giving commands but he also had show his old gentle side... at least to Donnie when they had been alone in his lab talking late at night. But then there was Leonardo who had become so cold... Had his role as general change him so much?

Lifting first aid kit in his arms Don shook his head, not wanting it to be the reason. Other reason would be all those killings what Leo had done 11 years ago but why they would effect on him only now? That didn't make any sense.

--

Raphael sat on his bed sighing deeply as Leo stood next to door, keeping his hands crossed over his chest.

"What do we do about tonight's mission, master?"

Raphael's golden eyes rose to meet Leo's eye, lowering back in to his lap as he thought about it.

"We can't abort it if Hun really is going to betray us. But I can't go out and fight... so there's only one option. You will be in charge of that mission, Leonardo."

"Are you sure about that? Wouldn't Goro be better choice? He have done missions much more than I have, Master Shredder."

"Raph. Call me Raph or Raphael when we are alone. And what comes to Goro, he's not here currently. Sent him and 3 other elites to train in special training place. You are my right hand and I trust you."

"But why?"

"Ugh, do we have to go through this talking AGAIN? How many times I need to tell you, Mike and Don are my brothers and I want us to stay as brothers but I can't treat you like my bros when there's others around. That's why I try to spend time alone with all of you so that we could be normally. Like in the old days. We're family. I trust all of you and I wish you guys could return that trust."

"...."

"I know it's hard for you to trust me but I still have hopes. But anyway if you think you can't or don't want to lead that mission, I will ask Don to do it. He can make plans and Mike can have his men ready to kick those idiots asses."

"No. No need to bother Donatello. I will do it, Sh--- Raph."

"So you trust me?"

"Have I ever said I wouldn't?"

Left side of Raph's mouth turned up as he smiled half way closing his eyes. "So you acting all cold and stuff hasn't had anything to do with it what happened 11 years ago."

"No."

"Then what it is?"

Those golden eyes were slightly commanding, curious, forcing and yet gentle and waiting as he scanned Leo's stone face but he saw slight hint of red crawling on his brother's cheeks.

"You can talk to me, Leonardo. Like always, everything what we talk about will stay inside these walls."

Leo shook his head managing to push that blush off on his cheeks.

"I know all that but it honestly isn't anything so serious or what we should talk about right now. Instead we should focus on the mission. You have a plan what to do and map?"

"Map's on the table over there." Raphael pointed toward this wide and big wooden table when Leo walked toward it, seeing huge map of the area where the ambush was set. Rolling that map in his hands and coming back to Raphael's big bed, Leo spread map in their laps sitting as close to Raph as possible to see all what he had to see.

"Tell me everything."

Raphael's finger started to traveled on that rustling paper when he clearly explained Leonardo his plan who kept nodding as a sign of understatement.

"You got this all, general?" He smirked to his brother. "Kill all those who needs to be killed but I would appreciate it if you could bring Hun to me alive. If not... He's all yours. I have full trust on you. You know what to do."

"Yes, master. Leave everything to me."

TBC....", "pools_count": 1, "title": "Out of His Shadow - Chapter 6", "deleted": "f", "public": "t", "mimetype": "text/rtf", "pagecount": "1", "rating_id": "2", "rating_name": "Adult", "ratings": [ { "content_tag_id": "5", "name": "Strong Violence", "description": "Strong violence, blood, serious injury or death", "rating_id": "2" } ], "submission_type_id": "12", "type_name": "Writing - Document", "guest_block": "f", "friends_only": "f", "comments_count": "0", "views": "98" }