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I got logged out of IB on my PC and just realy couldn't be bothered to log back in for the longest time. Well now I've bothered and now you get stuff. Huzzah!\n\nLet's start with a Dense short story", "description_bbcode_parsed": "Hello everyone!

Sorry for the long time with no post. I got logged out of IB on my PC and just realy couldn't be bothered to log back in for the longest time. Well now I've bothered and now you get stuff. Huzzah!

Let's start with a Dense short story", "writing": "Bass, drums, and piano. A distant trio growing in a steady crescendo as they play the tune of Take Five. The gentle scent of vanilla in the air was overtaken by the strong smell of cinnamon as the music swelled to fill the air.\n\tThe loud mechanical clack of a spotlight illuminated the world of a stage dressed in fine red curtains. Beyond its edge, little light danced giving shape to rows of tables across a lounge floor as their cousins floated in the air revealing booth against the concave walls.\n\n\t“Oh. . . I’m, here again” uttered the young boy who found himself in the spotlight..\n\nWelcome Ladies, Gentleman, and Others to The Velvet Rabbit Theater!\n\n\t“I could’ve sworn this place was an opera hall.” The boy said as he dismounted the stage to a quant dance floor that set between the stage and first row of tables, “Or was it a casino?”\n\t\n\tNeither Opera Hall nor Casino would have a space for the bold to cut a rug before the performer and Infront of an audience. Letting his eyes adjust to the dimmer lighting of the lounge, the boy could see the spaces layout more clearly. Circle tables draped in cloths with jars holding little candles. Booths embroidered with high quality leather, framing giant playing cards set into their walls. In a far corner of its own, a long bar lined with stools, and stocked top to bottom with unlabeled glass bottles of mysterious liquids. This was no grand old opry, nor bustling buzzing casino floor, it was a jazz club plain as day. Though one thing couldn't be denied, all three venues shared the same name, The Velvet Rabbit Theater.\n\n\t“Still getting hung up on the little details, Joseph?” a strange voice chuckled from the back of the boy’s mind.\n\t“Oh, you’re here too?” Joseph asked, with rhetorical sarcasm as he came to a stop.\n\t“Of course!” the voice announced with bombast, “Afterall, I am the proprietor and main attraction of this fine establishment. ”\n\n\tThis voice in Joseph’s head was incredibly strange, and not simply because it was in his head. Far stranger than its disembodied nature was its very sound. It didn't sound inhuman, in fact outside its showman-eques manner of speech the voice could be described as pleasant. Yet it always unsettled Joseph for reasons he couldn't quite grasp. The voice. . . It just sounded uncanny. Like its a voice he shouldn't be hearing, a feeling cemented by the voice’s strange habit of distorting whenever it tried to speak its own name.\n\n\t“For the record, I still can’t understand your name.” Joseph said as he walking, navigating between the empty tables.\n\t“It’s not my fault you’re bad at listening now, is it?” the voice ribbed him\n“It sounds more like you’re bad at talking.” Joseph returned, “Maybe you’d have an easier time if you dropped the showman routine you always put on.”\n“Maybe so.” The voice began, its tone shifting in a way implying a grin stretching from ear to ear, “But is it really wise to take the advice of the boy venturing on fool’s errand for an exit he knows doesn’t exist?”\n\nJoseph came to a halt, as he gazed towards the back of the club to a set of double doors.\n\nThere's no such thing a s question without and answer. There's no such thing as game without a win condition.\" he began, as he walked towards the doors, \"And there's no such thing as a building you can enter and not exit. Besides, if I'm here again, that means I had to have left somehow before. That said, I'll be sure to report this place for not having its exits clearly labeled. That's a safety hazard that'll get you shut down, you know?\" \n“Heheheheh!” the voice snickered, “Misguided as always but I'd be a liar if I said the level-headed spirit of yours wasn't without its own charm. Search to your heart’s content Joseph. I'll be looking forward to how you escape Check this time.\" “Don’t wait up.” Joseph said sarcastically as he pushed the doors open and stepped through.\n\nBeyond the double doors was a spiral staircase leading up. Its decorations were sparce but of quality like the lounge it connected to. Walls covered in smooth suede, recessed lights in the shame of the suits, an immaculate red carpet clinging to each step, and frames holding pictures calling to Joseph's eye and forcing his gaze to the steps below. Girls with snow white hair and irises as black as tar, naked as Eve in the garden of Eden with the air of inhabitants of the circles of hell. A strange type to have decorating the walls of a Jazz Club, but even stranger still was how they made Joseph fell. Sure, naked girls are to get a reaction out of any boy his age, but Joseph kept his eyes down to avoid uncanniness, not lust. He could only remember meeting a single white-haired girl in his life and he didn't need to check the pictures to know she wasn't amongst the ones that surround him. So why do these girls seem familiar? The pictures were like a far-off melody, beckoning he brain to focus on them and decipher their connection.\nThe poking at his brain made Joseph pick up his pace, jogging up the steps until he saw the light at the end. Opera hall, Casino, or even Jazz Club, not matter the form there was always a singular common room in The Velvet Rabbit Theater, its lobby. Still in the same fashion of the rest of the Theater the lobby was far simpler and almost liminal in nature. Within there were only three things of note. A coat check counter that was never manned, a framed poster adjacent to it, and set into the farthest wall where one would expect to find a door was a full length mirror.\n“. . .” Joseph took a deep breath to steel himself as he approached the mirror.\n\nTo Joseph, there were three things about the Velvet Rabbit Theater that never failed to unsettle him in some way. The first and most obvious was the Theater itself. A seemingly shapeshifting space with no exit that always seemed to find a way to trap him within its walls. The second, was this mirror.\n“. . . Everything seems in place.” Joseph said as he gazed at his reflection.\n\nStaring back at him was a preteen boy with a caramel complexion, and messy, overgrown black hair. Blue square framed glasses, a grey sleeveless hoodie over a light blue shirt, cargo shorts with occupied, pockets, navy blue hiking sandals, and a blue and white friendship bracelet on his left wrist. From head to toe, the image Joseph saw in the mirror was his own. No warping. No moving. No tricks, ghosts, or demons. . . So why does looking at this reflection give him a sense of unease?\n\n“If you really enjoy looking at yourself in the mirror so much, my usual offer still remains open.” The voice chimed in, before its tone dropped, “Though like the tired song and dance of you looking for an exit, I imagine your response will always be the same.”\n\n\tThe third, and ironically least unsettling thing about the Theater was its disembodied inhabitant. A voice always speaking, somehow, from the back of Joseph's mind. Not just speaking, seemingly residing as it wasn't uncommon for the voice to commentate on his thoughts and memories.\n“It certainly proves you’re a hypocrite to talk about me looking for the exit when you have, you’re broken record routine.” Joseph retorted, turning away from the mirror and towards the poster, “So I’ll reply to your offer with my usual demands. If you want me to wander backstage to your dressing room, you at the very least have to show yourself.”\n\nWhile many things in the theater made Joseph's brain feel like TV static, there was one thing that made it feel clear. The one thing he could read within its walls. The one thing that gave him any sort of straight clear answer.\n\nJoseph walked up the poster and gaze at it behind its protective layer of glass. The poster was in the design of a playing card, but instead Hearts, Spades, Diamonds, Clubs, Ks, Q, or Js its four corners were decorated with the two-toned facades of harlequin rabbits colored red and black. Along the top the text read \"The Velvet Rabbit Theater Presents: The Greatest Entertainer this side of the Outer Rings. Connoisseur of Card. Magical Maestro of Music. Gentleman, Scholar, and Sinner without a Sin. . .”, and under the silhouette of an anthropomorphic rabbit wearing a top hat and colombina mask was the name\n\n\"The Amazing Joker.\" Joseph said aloud \n“You call?” the voice chimed in on cue, \"Curiouser and curiouser that you can read my name from the poster but can't hear me say it. Or perhaps it's just that your love of rabbit makes you pay more attention than normal.\"\n\"Curiouser?\" Joseph asked, \"Have you been reading Alice in Wonderland while I was looking?\"\n\n\"Literature is a great source of inspiration.\" Joker chuckled, \"Little Alice wasn't too good at listening either. Perhaps I should send in a rabbit. Would that make you more cooperative?\"\n\n\"I may like rabbits, but not enough to go blindly following one sent by a disembodied voice.\" Joseph said, \"I'll play you card against you and learn from Alice not to go following strange rabbit and risk losing my head.\"\n\n\"If you're going to play a card you should understand it first.\" Joker retorted, \"Alice may have face a few threats, but the worst fate she met in Wonderland was wet knickers.\"\n\n\"Of course you would point out the most perverted detail.\" Joseph said with blushed cheeks as he made his way back towards the stairs \"You should really tone that down. You're bound to find yourself in serious trouble between the pictures you hang on the walls and comments like that.\"\n\n\"Oh? And what trouble would I find myself in?\" Joker questioned, \"You call it perverse, but I can assure you girls quite enjoy having their beauty appreciated. Their naked formed, groomed hair, and carefully selected outfits from bows to panties. You try to present yourself as mature and respectful Joseph, but with a closed off mind like that you'll stay a child scared by the sight of a girl's panties.\nJoseph stumbled at Joker’s words, feeling his cheeks grow warm.\n\n“W-what did you say?” Joseph asked\n“Oh? Are we playing the game of rhetorical questions again?” Joker mused, “Well then here’s mine. Why don’t you venture back-“\n“Not going to your dressing room.” Joseph cut Joker off, as he began his descent.\n\n\"Still not tired of your silly little games of solitaire?\" Joker asked\n\"It's the only game I can play while I'm here.\" Joseph replied, \"Besides the rhetorical question game.\"\n\"That's where you're wrong.\" Joker mused, \"There are far more games for you to play. Games for us to play. Fun is but a short walk away, beyond the stage, down the corridor, and behind the door with the black star.\"\n\"If that's your best pitch to lure me to your dressing you, don't quit your day job, because you're a bad salesman.\" Joker jabbed.\n\"Hmph. Well, I can't argue with you there.\" Joker relented with a huff, \"I'm a game master and entertainer. I excel at bringing fun and entertainment.\"\n\"Excel is a strong word.\" Joseph jabbed again\n\"And a well-earned one.\" Joker replied, \"Here, a demonstration of my prowess. On the house.\"\nAs Joseph made his way down the stairs, something on the edge of his vision caught his attention. Looking over, he felt his face grow hot. The frames once holding the images of naked white-haired girls, now a uniform candid upskirt image of a girl in plaid skirt wearing white panties decorated with colorful jellybeans.\n\n“R-REALLY!?!” Joseph blurted, before he felt his weight drop.\n\n\tDistracted by the pictures, he missed a step and was doomed to tumble the rest of the way to the bottom. Or at least he should’ve been.\n\n\t“Oof!” he let out a grunt as he landed rather softly on the ground of the jazz club\n\t“. . . Mr. Ashens. . . Mr. Ashens.”\n\t“Ugh.” Joseph groaned getting to his knees, “Calling me that doesn’t make me any less mad about the tricks you pulled.”\n\t“That’s not me Joseph.” Joker said, “You and I are far beyond such formal names. I’m afraid our time is up.”\n\n\t“Mr. Ashens. . . It’s time to wake. . .”\n\t“Wait. . . What?” Joseph asked as his vision began to blur, and the ground beneath him began to soften.\n\t“Here are some parting words for you.” Joker began as his voice steadily grew more distant, “Just because I’m your opponent, does not mean that I’m your enemy.”\n\t\n\tAll around Joseph The Velvet Rabbit Theater began to melt and turn to a rapidly dissipating mist.\n\t“The answer is thirty-two by the way.” Joker’s voice said sounding miles away, before the floor beneath Joseph gave way, and he plummeted into blackness.\n\n\tBlinding brightness filled Joseph’s vision, as his eye’s squinted to try and stem how much flooded into his pupils. He let out a groan as he lifted his head and a desk with a small pool of drool came into vision. Raising his head up and adjusting his glasses he saw boys and girls his age dressed in school uniforms of white tops accessorized with ties and bow and shorts and skirts respectively, seated at desks looking at him with expressions of subtle amusement or general indifference.\n\n\t“Welcome back to reality Mr. Ashens.” A woman’s said with amused kindness.\n\n\tJoseph’s eyes finally began to focus as his brain caught up to his body. He had fallen asleep in class again. A semi-regular occurrence that had started a few years ago when he suddenly developed a unique case of narcolepsy. Numerous test and doctors visits failed to connect the condition to a cause, and even stranger, no consistency or pattern could be found between the episodes. Sometimes it would happen daily, and other times he could go weeks without falling into a sleeping spell.\n\t\n\t“Care to perform your little trick for us, before you fully wake up?” the woman’s voice asked\n\tLooking towards the front of the class he saw his teacher Ms. Clarkson in front of the whiteboard looking back at him with a smile. She held up a math textbook to obscure an equation, with only its equal sign visible to him.\n\tJoseph let out a yawn with a big stretch, as he felt the sleepiness melt off his body like a popsicle in an oven. Though while the sleep faded, an echo remained in the back of his mind.\n\n\t“Thirty-two?” he answered with a question\n\t“. . . Correct yet again!” Ms. Clarkson chimed, as she lowered the book and revealed the rest of the equation and wrote the answer, “I swear, where were kids like you when I was writing my final thesis in college? A paper about children’s cognitive ability to learn while sleeping is waaaay more interesting than my actual one. The effects paper color has on the moral of children and their enjoyment of learning.”\n\n\tThe teachers words got some amused giggles from the class, though Joseph’s newly awakened attention was drawn to a notebook waving from the row next to his.\n\tLooking over, he saw the familiar friendly sight of a peer with neat mid-length blonde hair with bangs so long they completely obscured their eyes. One of his closest friends on the whole globe, Alexander ‘Alex, never Xander’ Flueric.\n\n\t“You okay Jojo?” Alex mouthed giving a questioning thumbs up.\n\tJoseph let out another short yawn, before nodding and giving a thumbs up back.\n\tAlex smiled and opened their mouth as if preparing to mouth something else, but Ms. Clarkson’s voice came out as she was addressing the class again, drawing both of their attention to the front\n\n\t“Okay everyone, I’m going to pass out your worksheets now. Be sure to take your time and complete them frontside and back. Once you’re done bring them to my desk, and as you should all know, if you have any questions, you should never be afraid to ask. Isn’t that right, Mr. Ashens?” Ms. Clarkson asked, looking directly at Joseph.\n\t“Heh, right Ms. Clarkson.” Joseph said rubbing the back of his head.\n\tMs. Clarkson smiled and nodded, “As usual you and your study buddy can set up in the back of the classroom to get you caught up on the notes, then you can do your worksheets together. And don’t worry about you drool lake. I’ll clean it up this time.”\n\n\tThe class snickered and giggled as Joseph could only blush at the little tease. Joseph collected his notebook and pencil case and got up to move to the back of the class, when a very serious expression on Alex’s face caught his attention.\n \n\t “What’s wrong?” Joseph asked in a whisper lingering by Alex’s desk in passing.\n\t“My prayers are with you Jojo.” Alex whispered back, clasping their hands together, “Hopefully whatever happened this morning wasn’t too bad.”\n\t“Huh?” Joseph asked tilting his head\n\t“Joseph!” a girl’s voice called out from the back of the class.\n\t\n\tSitting in the back of the classroom waving to him was Katie McCormick. Joseph’s cheeks quickly turned red as memories from that morning flooded back into his mind. The two had no real relationship to speak of outside being classmates. In fact, Katie was more familiar with his friend Zoe as both girls were on the school pep committee, a student organization focused on keeping the school’s vibes positive, but not distracting. Joseph had come to school earlier to use a music practice room and ran into Katie in the hall. She had come in early to decorate the classroom as a surprise for their teacher and asked him to help. The decoration she was most proud of was a paper daisy chain she spent the whole weekend working on. She wanted to hang it around the window to mimic vines and flowers growing around them. Under the stereotype of the big strong boy Katie asked him to stay behind her while she stood on the windowsill while she hung the chain to catch her if she fell. All was going well until Katie stepped into of a window that cracked open, and is by the will of an ecchi manga loving god a strong breeze rolled in and blew her plaid skirt up putting a jellybean panty clad butt on display to watching Joseph.\n\tBy the time Katie squeaked and pushed her skirt back down in reaction, Joseph was already out the classroom door. Ever since Joseph had been doing his best to avoid interacting with Katie, something Alex had quickly picked up on, but Joseph refused to explain preferring to let the whole thing blow over with time. Though it appeared fate had different plans as Katie was waiting for him as they’d be stuck together for the rest of class.\n\t\n\t“Uh, H-hi Katie.” Joseph said, trying to play it cool as he joined her at the table in the back of the class, those no amount of playing cool could counter his rosy cheeks.\n\t“Hi Joseph. Have a good nap?” she asked with a small smile.\n\t\n\tJoseph chuckled as her causal response let a wave a calm wash over him. He took his seat next to her with a renewed hope that they could go through class without the awkward conversation about the morning’s events.\n\n\t“Sooooo~” Katie began, “About this morning. . .”\n\n\tJoseph’s calm instantly shattered as he felt his spirit try to eject from his body.\n\n\t“Wait! Wait! Wait!” Katie pleaded in a hushed tone seeing his reaction, “I’m not mad. I know it was 100% an accident. I mean, not like you can control the wind of something. I just wanted to clear the air, because of how fast you ran off.”\n\t“O-oh. Okay. . .” Joseph said calming down a bit, “I’m s-“\n\t“Nope!” Katie cut him off, “No apologies. Like I said. It’s not your fault. . . Aaaaand~”\n\t“A-And?” Joseph asked, tilting his head confused what else could be added to this.\n\t“. . .” Katie looked around making sure no one was paying attention to them, “Don’t take this the wrong way, but I did kind of. . . like that you saw them. But like I said, don’t go getting the wrong idea. I just really like these panties. They’re probably my favorite pair, so someone else seeing them kind of felt nice. Kind of the like the feeling I got when everyone saw my decorations when class started. Besides, out of the entire school, if they had to be seen by any boy, you’re probably one of the best options.”\n\t“O-oh. . .” Joseph said rolling what he just heard around in his head, “I guess that makes sense.”\n\t“Yeah, but it’s still a once in a lifetime thing, Joseph Ashen, so you better have committed to memory because you’re never seeing them again.” Katie said sternly, before letting out a giggle revealing she was poking fun at him, those his tomato red face showed he took it all very seriously.\n\t“R-Right!” Joseph said before back tracking, “B-but I’d never do that anyways.”\n\t“Ummm, it’s okay if you do.” Katie said, now her turn to blush as he eyes arch away from him, “Because, umm. . . Well Zoe and I are on the pep committee, and you guys are friends. . . And I. . . May have known since the school year started that you wear bunny print underwear. . .”\n\n\t“. . .”\n\t“. . .”\n\n\tJoseph’s tomato red face steadily returned to its normal light brown color as the boy took his glasses off and placed them gently on the table before folding his arms and resting his head on them.\n\t“Uh, Joseph?” Katie asked, “What are you doing?”\n\t“I’ve had enough reality for today. See you tomorrow.” He said in a defeated voice before closing his eyes.\n\t“Ah! Joseph wait!” Katie said trying to keep her voice low enough not to draw attention, “I didn’t tell anyone! I-it kind of came up randomly in a conversation! Zoe was showing me some of the pictures she took, and I saw one of you with your grey hoodie with the ears on, and I kind of made a joke about you liking rabbit so much you probably even have them on your underwear, and Zoe just casually confirmed it because she’s a weird hippie girl with no- Wait, she’s you friend. Umm. . . Come on Joseph! Don’t go into a coma! Please wake up, pleeeeeeease~!”\n\n“And for the rest of that week and the following as penitence for her carelessness, Katie McCormick left little notes in Joseph’s desk informing him of what her panty pattern of the day was. This, however, didn’t last two weeks, as Katie realized she already hit a repeat point and gave up due to embarrassment. Needless to say, she learned a valuable life lesson from this experience. A girl should have enough underwear so that she can wear a different pair for at least two weeks before hitting a repeat. Hehehehehehe!”\n\n[center][u][i][b]Fin[/b][/i][/u][/center]\n", "writing_bbcode_parsed": "Bass, drums, and piano. A distant trio growing in a steady crescendo as they play the tune of Take Five. The gentle scent of vanilla in the air was overtaken by the strong smell of cinnamon as the music swelled to fill the air.
\tThe loud mechanical clack of a spotlight illuminated the world of a stage dressed in fine red curtains. Beyond its edge, little light danced giving shape to rows of tables across a lounge floor as their cousins floated in the air revealing booth against the concave walls.

\t“Oh. . . I’m, here again” uttered the young boy who found himself in the spotlight..

Welcome Ladies, Gentleman, and Others to The Velvet Rabbit Theater!

\t“I could’ve sworn this place was an opera hall.” The boy said as he dismounted the stage to a quant dance floor that set between the stage and first row of tables, “Or was it a casino?”
\t
\tNeither Opera Hall nor Casino would have a space for the bold to cut a rug before the performer and Infront of an audience. Letting his eyes adjust to the dimmer lighting of the lounge, the boy could see the spaces layout more clearly. Circle tables draped in cloths with jars holding little candles. Booths embroidered with high quality leather, framing giant playing cards set into their walls. In a far corner of its own, a long bar lined with stools, and stocked top to bottom with unlabeled glass bottles of mysterious liquids. This was no grand old opry, nor bustling buzzing casino floor, it was a jazz club plain as day. Though one thing couldn't be denied, all three venues shared the same name, The Velvet Rabbit Theater.

\t“Still getting hung up on the little details, Joseph?” a strange voice chuckled from the back of the boy’s mind.
\t“Oh, you’re here too?” Joseph asked, with rhetorical sarcasm as he came to a stop.
\t“Of course!” the voice announced with bombast, “Afterall, I am the proprietor and main attraction of this fine establishment.  ”

\tThis voice in Joseph’s head was incredibly strange, and not simply because it was in his head. Far stranger than its disembodied nature was its very sound. It didn't sound inhuman, in fact outside its showman-eques manner of speech the voice could be described as pleasant. Yet it always unsettled Joseph for reasons he couldn't quite grasp. The voice. . . It just sounded uncanny. Like its a voice he shouldn't be hearing, a feeling cemented by the voice’s strange habit of distorting whenever it tried to speak its own name.

\t“For the record, I still can’t understand your name.” Joseph said as he walking, navigating between the empty tables.
\t“It’s not my fault you’re bad at listening now, is it?” the voice ribbed him
“It sounds more like you’re bad at talking.” Joseph returned, “Maybe you’d have an easier time if you dropped the showman routine you always put on.”
“Maybe so.” The voice began, its tone shifting in a way implying a grin stretching from ear to ear, “But is it really wise to take the advice of the boy venturing on fool’s errand for an exit he knows doesn’t exist?”

Joseph came to a halt, as he gazed towards the back of the club to a set of double doors.

There's no such thing a s question without and answer. There's no such thing as game without a win condition." he began, as he walked towards the doors, "And there's no such thing as a building you can enter and not exit. Besides, if I'm here again, that means I had to have left somehow before. That said, I'll be sure to report this place for not having its exits clearly labeled. That's a safety hazard that'll get you shut down, you know?"
“Heheheheh!” the voice snickered, “Misguided as always but I'd be a liar if I said the level-headed spirit of yours wasn't without its own charm. Search to your heart’s content Joseph. I'll be looking forward to how you escape Check this time." “Don’t wait up.” Joseph said sarcastically as he pushed the doors open and stepped through.

Beyond the double doors was a spiral staircase leading up. Its decorations were sparce but of quality like the lounge it connected to. Walls covered in smooth suede, recessed lights in the shame of the suits, an immaculate red carpet clinging to each step, and frames holding pictures calling to Joseph's eye and forcing his gaze to the steps below. Girls with snow white hair and irises as black as tar, naked as Eve in the garden of Eden with the air of inhabitants of the circles of hell. A strange type to have decorating the walls of a Jazz Club, but even stranger still was how they made Joseph fell. Sure, naked girls are to get a reaction out of any boy his age, but Joseph kept his eyes down to avoid uncanniness, not lust. He could only remember meeting a single white-haired girl in his life and he didn't need to check the pictures to know she wasn't amongst the ones that surround him. So why do these girls seem familiar? The pictures were like a far-off melody, beckoning he brain to focus on them and decipher their connection.
The poking at his brain made Joseph pick up his pace, jogging up the steps until he saw the light at the end. Opera hall, Casino, or even Jazz Club, not matter the form there was always a singular common room in The Velvet Rabbit Theater, its lobby. Still in the same fashion of the rest of the Theater the lobby was far simpler and almost liminal in nature. Within there were only three things of note. A coat check counter that was never manned, a framed poster adjacent to it, and set into the farthest wall where one would expect to find a door was a full length mirror.
“. . .” Joseph took a deep breath to steel himself as he approached the mirror.

To Joseph, there were three things about the Velvet Rabbit Theater that never failed to unsettle him in some way. The first and most obvious was the Theater itself. A seemingly shapeshifting space with no exit that always seemed to find a way to trap him within its walls. The second, was this mirror.
“. . . Everything seems in place.” Joseph said as he gazed at his reflection.

Staring back at him was a preteen boy with a caramel complexion, and messy, overgrown black hair. Blue square framed glasses, a grey sleeveless hoodie over a light blue shirt, cargo shorts with occupied, pockets, navy blue hiking sandals, and a blue and white friendship bracelet on his left wrist. From head to toe, the image Joseph saw in the mirror was his own. No warping. No moving. No tricks, ghosts, or demons. . . So why does looking at this reflection give him a sense of unease?

“If you really enjoy looking at yourself in the mirror so much, my usual offer still remains open.” The voice chimed in, before its tone dropped, “Though like the tired song and dance of you looking for an exit, I imagine your response will always be the same.”

\tThe third, and ironically least unsettling thing about the Theater was its disembodied inhabitant. A voice always speaking, somehow, from the back of Joseph's mind. Not just speaking, seemingly residing as it wasn't uncommon for the voice to commentate on his thoughts and memories.
“It certainly proves you’re a hypocrite to talk about me looking for the exit when you have, you’re broken record routine.” Joseph retorted, turning away from the mirror and towards the poster, “So I’ll reply to your offer with my usual demands. If you want me to wander backstage to your dressing room, you at the very least have to show yourself.”

While many things in the theater made Joseph's brain feel like TV static, there was one thing that made it feel clear. The one thing he could read within its walls. The one thing that gave him any sort of straight clear answer.

Joseph walked up the poster and gaze at it behind its protective layer of glass. The poster was in the design of a playing card, but instead Hearts, Spades, Diamonds, Clubs, Ks, Q, or Js its four corners were decorated with the two-toned facades of harlequin rabbits colored red and black. Along the top the text read "The Velvet Rabbit Theater Presents: The Greatest Entertainer this side of the Outer Rings. Connoisseur of Card. Magical Maestro of Music. Gentleman, Scholar, and Sinner without a Sin. . .”, and under the silhouette of an anthropomorphic rabbit wearing a top hat and colombina mask was the name

"The Amazing Joker." Joseph said aloud
“You call?” the voice chimed in on cue, "Curiouser and curiouser that you can read my name from the poster but can't hear me say it. Or perhaps it's just that your love of rabbit makes you pay more attention than normal."
"Curiouser?" Joseph asked, "Have you been reading Alice in Wonderland while I was looking?"

"Literature is a great source of inspiration." Joker chuckled, "Little Alice wasn't too good at listening either. Perhaps I should send in a rabbit. Would that make you more cooperative?"

"I may like rabbits, but not enough to go blindly following one sent by a disembodied voice." Joseph said, "I'll play you card against you and learn from Alice not to go following strange rabbit and risk losing my head."

"If you're going to play a card you should understand it first." Joker retorted, "Alice may have face a few threats, but the worst fate she met in Wonderland was wet knickers."

"Of course you would point out the most perverted detail." Joseph said with blushed cheeks as he made his way back towards the stairs "You should really tone that down. You're bound to find yourself in serious trouble between the pictures you hang on the walls and comments like that."

"Oh? And what trouble would I find myself in?" Joker questioned, "You call it perverse, but I can assure you girls quite enjoy having their beauty appreciated. Their naked formed, groomed hair, and carefully selected outfits from bows to panties. You try to present yourself as mature and respectful Joseph, but with a closed off mind like that you'll stay a child scared by the sight of a girl's panties.
Joseph stumbled at Joker’s words, feeling his cheeks grow warm.

“W-what did you say?” Joseph asked
“Oh? Are we playing the game of rhetorical questions again?” Joker mused, “Well then here’s mine. Why don’t you venture back-“
“Not going to your dressing room.” Joseph cut Joker off, as he began his descent.

"Still not tired of your silly little games of solitaire?" Joker asked
"It's the only game I can play while I'm here." Joseph replied, "Besides the rhetorical question game."
"That's where you're wrong." Joker mused, "There are far more games for you to play. Games for us to play. Fun is but a short walk away, beyond the stage, down the corridor, and behind the door with the black star."
"If that's your best pitch to lure me to your dressing you, don't quit your day job, because you're a bad salesman." Joker jabbed.
"Hmph. Well, I can't argue with you there." Joker relented with a huff, "I'm a game master and entertainer. I excel at bringing fun and entertainment."
"Excel is a strong word." Joseph jabbed again
"And a well-earned one." Joker replied, "Here, a demonstration of my prowess. On the house."
As Joseph made his way down the stairs, something on the edge of his vision caught his attention. Looking over, he felt his face grow hot. The frames once holding the images of naked white-haired girls, now a uniform candid upskirt image of a girl in plaid skirt wearing white panties decorated with colorful jellybeans.

“R-REALLY!?!” Joseph blurted, before he felt his weight drop.

\tDistracted by the pictures, he missed a step and was doomed to tumble the rest of the way to the bottom. Or at least he should’ve been.

\t“Oof!” he let out a grunt as he landed rather softly on the ground of the jazz club
\t“. . . Mr. Ashens. . . Mr. Ashens.”
\t“Ugh.” Joseph groaned getting to his knees, “Calling me that doesn’t make me any less mad about the tricks you pulled.”
\t“That’s not me Joseph.” Joker said, “You and I are far beyond such formal names. I’m afraid our time is up.”

\t“Mr. Ashens. . . It’s time to wake. . .”
\t“Wait. . . What?” Joseph asked as his vision began to blur, and the ground beneath him began to soften.
\t“Here are some parting words for you.” Joker began as his voice steadily grew more distant, “Just because I’m your opponent, does not mean that I’m your enemy.”
\t
\tAll around Joseph The Velvet Rabbit Theater began to melt and turn to a rapidly dissipating mist.
\t“The answer is thirty-two by the way.” Joker’s voice said sounding miles away, before the floor beneath Joseph gave way, and he plummeted into blackness.

\tBlinding brightness filled Joseph’s vision, as his eye’s squinted to try and stem how much flooded into his pupils. He let out a groan as he lifted his head and a desk with a small pool of drool came into vision. Raising his head up and adjusting his glasses he saw boys and girls his age dressed in school uniforms of white tops accessorized with ties and bow and shorts and skirts respectively, seated at desks looking at him with expressions of subtle amusement or general indifference.

\t“Welcome back to reality Mr. Ashens.” A woman’s said with amused kindness.

\tJoseph’s eyes finally began to focus as his brain caught up to his body. He had fallen asleep in class again. A semi-regular occurrence that had started a few years ago when he suddenly developed a unique case of narcolepsy. Numerous test and doctors visits failed to connect the condition to a cause, and even stranger, no consistency or pattern could be found between the episodes. Sometimes it would happen daily, and other times he could go weeks without falling into a sleeping spell.
\t
\t“Care to perform your little trick for us, before you fully wake up?” the woman’s voice asked
\tLooking towards the front of the class he saw his teacher Ms. Clarkson in front of the whiteboard looking back at him with a smile.  She held up a math textbook to obscure an equation, with only its equal sign visible to him.
\tJoseph let out a yawn with a big stretch, as he felt the sleepiness melt off his body like a popsicle in an oven. Though while the sleep faded, an echo remained in the back of his mind.

\t“Thirty-two?” he answered with a question
\t“. . . Correct yet again!” Ms. Clarkson chimed, as she lowered the book and revealed the rest of the equation and wrote the answer, “I swear, where were kids like you when I was writing my final thesis in college? A paper about children’s cognitive ability to learn while sleeping is waaaay more interesting than my actual one. The effects paper color has on the moral of children and their enjoyment of learning.”

\tThe teachers words got some amused giggles from the class, though Joseph’s newly awakened attention was drawn to a notebook waving from the row next to his.
\tLooking over, he saw the familiar friendly sight of a peer with neat mid-length blonde hair with bangs so long they completely obscured their eyes. One of his closest friends on the whole globe, Alexander ‘Alex, never Xander’ Flueric.

\t“You okay Jojo?” Alex mouthed giving a questioning thumbs up.
\tJoseph let out another short yawn, before nodding and giving a thumbs up back.
\tAlex smiled and opened their mouth as if preparing to mouth something else, but Ms. Clarkson’s voice came out as she was addressing the class again, drawing both of their attention to the front

\t“Okay everyone, I’m going to pass out your worksheets now. Be sure to take your time and complete them frontside and back. Once you’re done bring them to my desk, and as you should all know, if you have any questions, you should never be afraid to ask. Isn’t that right, Mr. Ashens?” Ms. Clarkson asked, looking directly at Joseph.
\t“Heh, right Ms. Clarkson.” Joseph said rubbing the back of his head.
\tMs. Clarkson smiled and nodded, “As usual you and your study buddy can set up in the back of the classroom to get you caught up on the notes, then you can do your worksheets together. And don’t worry about you drool lake. I’ll clean it up this time.”

\tThe class snickered and giggled as Joseph could only blush at the little tease. Joseph collected his notebook and pencil case and got up to move to the back of the class, when a very serious expression on Alex’s face caught his attention.
 
\t “What’s wrong?” Joseph asked in a whisper lingering by Alex’s desk in passing.
\t“My prayers are with you Jojo.” Alex whispered back, clasping their hands together, “Hopefully whatever happened this morning wasn’t too bad.”
\t“Huh?” Joseph asked tilting his head
\t“Joseph!” a girl’s voice called out from the back of the class.
\t
\tSitting in the back of the classroom waving to him was Katie McCormick. Joseph’s cheeks quickly turned red as memories from that morning flooded back into his mind. The two had no real relationship to speak of outside being classmates. In fact, Katie was more familiar with his friend Zoe as both girls were on the school pep committee, a student organization focused on keeping the school’s vibes positive, but not distracting. Joseph had come to school earlier to use a music practice room and ran into Katie in the hall. She had come in early to decorate the classroom as a surprise for their teacher and asked him to help. The decoration she was most proud of was a paper daisy chain she spent the whole weekend working on. She wanted to hang it around the window to mimic vines and flowers growing around them. Under the stereotype of the big strong boy Katie asked him to stay behind her while she stood on the windowsill while she hung the chain to catch her if she fell. All was going well until Katie stepped into of a window that cracked open, and is by the will of an ecchi manga loving god a strong breeze rolled in and blew her plaid skirt up putting a jellybean panty clad butt on display to watching Joseph.
\tBy the time Katie squeaked and pushed her skirt back down in reaction, Joseph was already out the classroom door. Ever since Joseph had been doing his best to avoid interacting with Katie, something Alex had quickly picked up on, but Joseph refused to explain preferring to let the whole thing blow over with time. Though it appeared fate had different plans as Katie was waiting for him as they’d be stuck together for the rest of class.
\t
\t“Uh, H-hi Katie.” Joseph said, trying to play it cool as he joined her at the table in the back of the class, those no amount of playing cool could counter his rosy cheeks.
\t“Hi Joseph. Have a good nap?” she asked with a small smile.
\t
\tJoseph chuckled as her causal response let a wave a calm wash over him. He took his seat next to her with a renewed hope that they could go through class without the awkward conversation about the morning’s events.

\t“Sooooo~” Katie began, “About this morning. . .”

\tJoseph’s calm instantly shattered as he felt his spirit try to eject from his body.

\t“Wait! Wait! Wait!” Katie pleaded in a hushed tone seeing his reaction, “I’m not mad. I know it was 100% an accident. I mean, not like you can control the wind of something. I just wanted to clear the air, because of how fast you ran off.”
\t“O-oh. Okay. . .” Joseph said calming down a bit, “I’m s-“
\t“Nope!” Katie cut him off, “No apologies. Like I said. It’s not your fault. . . Aaaaand~”
\t“A-And?” Joseph asked, tilting his head confused what else could be added to this.
\t“. . .” Katie looked around making sure no one was paying attention to them, “Don’t take this the wrong way, but I did kind of. . . like that you saw them. But like I said, don’t go getting the wrong idea. I just really like these panties. They’re probably my favorite pair, so someone else seeing them kind of felt nice. Kind of the like the feeling I got when everyone saw my decorations when class started. Besides, out of the entire school, if they had to be seen by any boy, you’re probably one of the best options.”
\t“O-oh. . .” Joseph said rolling what he just heard around in his head, “I guess that makes sense.”
\t“Yeah, but it’s still a once in a lifetime thing, Joseph Ashen, so you better have committed to memory because you’re never seeing them again.” Katie said sternly, before letting out a giggle revealing she was poking fun at him, those his tomato red face showed he took it all very seriously.
\t“R-Right!” Joseph said before back tracking, “B-but I’d never do that anyways.”
\t“Ummm, it’s okay if you do.” Katie said, now her turn to blush as he eyes arch away from him, “Because, umm. . . Well Zoe and I are on the pep committee, and you guys are friends. . . And I. . . May have known since the school year started that you wear bunny print underwear. . .”

\t“. . .”
\t“. . .”

\tJoseph’s tomato red face steadily returned to its normal light brown color as the boy took his glasses off and placed them gently on the table before folding his arms and resting his head on them.
\t“Uh, Joseph?” Katie asked, “What are you doing?”
\t“I’ve had enough reality for today. See you tomorrow.” He said in a defeated voice before closing his eyes.
\t“Ah! Joseph wait!” Katie said trying to keep her voice low enough not to draw attention, “I didn’t tell anyone! I-it kind of came up randomly in a conversation! Zoe was showing me some of the pictures she took, and I saw one of you with your grey hoodie with the ears on, and I kind of made a joke about you liking rabbit so much you probably even have them on your underwear, and Zoe just casually confirmed it because she’s a weird hippie girl with no- Wait, she’s you friend. Umm. . . Come on Joseph! Don’t go into a coma! Please wake up, pleeeeeeease~!”

“And for the rest of that week and the following as penitence for her carelessness, Katie McCormick left little notes in Joseph’s desk informing him of what her panty pattern of the day was. This, however, didn’t last two weeks, as Katie realized she already hit a repeat point and gave up due to embarrassment. Needless to say, she learned a valuable life lesson from this experience. A girl should have enough underwear so that she can wear a different pair for at least two weeks before hitting a repeat. Hehehehehehe!”

Fin

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