Breakfast was good, the make out session in the hall was better; the sex was out of this world. Drowsy I lie in bed, his head resting on my shoulder, the sheets tangled around my waist, his ass, still sticky at places pressed against my thigh. I run my fingers lazily over his chest, not really awake, yet not asleep either. I'm in that half state, sometimes awake sometimes not. I think I've slept, though I have no idea how long, or what time it is now, for that matter. I shift, slightly, I don't want to disturb him, or prompt him to move. He does it anyways, much to my annoyance. Fine. I turn, grabbing him around his waist before he can shift away from me. He gives a small grunt, but I drag him closer like he's a ragdoll, nuzzling his ear, enjoying that faint smell trace that is so uniquely him. I take a strip of sheet and pull it more firmly over him, wanting to make sure that he isn't cold. If anyone had told me I could enjoy the feeling of a naked body of another male next to me as much as I do now, I would have declared them insane. Odd thing is I do. I keep running my paw over his body whenever I get the chance, tracing the ridges and gentle curves, that little dip around his bellybutton, the skin of his sheath, his fuzzy balls, the tail now draped over my hipbone. I used to be a guy who knew everything, or at least knew what he was doing, what he liked and what not. Every day I am discovering new things about myself. Things he is making me realize. That small annoying voice in the back of my mind asks me if this means all my previous encounters with women have all been lies, a means to supress my true feelings. I tell it to go fuck itself. I don't want to think about it and, more importantly, I do not care. Something tells me this pup is one in a million. This pup, my pup. I nip his ear. He lets out a small grunt of protest from somewhere in his throat. "Mine." I mutter, tugging him even closer. His paw slides over my side. It's at an awkward angle because of his position against me. I don't care, if that is even possible I try to get even closer, soaking in his pleasant warmth. I must have fallen asleep, because he slides back in bed with me. "Still asleep Mr Sleepyhead?" He whispers, his fingers tracing a line over my forehead. I nod, arching into his touch, as if I were a young pup. There is something wrong. It tugs at me, forcing me to open my eyes. He's propped up on one elbow, looking down on me, his fingers still drawing imaginary lines over my face. He looks as I remember, but there is something different. How do can I be so sure? It doesn't matter, I decide, I am. "What's wrong?" I ask. "I... You like me, don't you?" "Yeah, I do." "Do you... love me?" "Yes." No hesitation, surprising the both of us with my decisiveness. "Even... even if..." He hesitates, avoiding my gaze, instead focussing on the bed sheets. I sit up, the lazy easiness of before has dissolved. "What is it Aeson?" He looks scared, withdrawing from my touch. "Forget it." Before I can grasp his arm he is beyond my reach, leaving me stumbling over myself while he disappears into the bathroom, closing the door. "Aeson! Whatever it is, we can work it out. What is it? Just talk to me!" But he is gone. I can hear water running. He's probably trying to drown me out, because I know he took a shower while I was still in bed. When he emerges again he makes no inclination of wanting to talk about it, and I'm late... again, so I have to rush through my washing ritual and leave things be. I peck him on the cheek. "I do... I love you." I whisper in his ear, which does not have the desired effect on him. Wei is already waiting for me, arms crossed, scowling. "I'm on time, I am!" He grunts something inaudible and steps aside. I keep wondering what is going on, what was wrong, why Aeson was acting so... strange. Is it something I did, should have done, what? Not that I know much about these guy/guy relationships, though I highly doubt they are very different from other kinds of love relationships. I look at the people around me. Maybe he feels I am hiding him. I never introduced him to my friends. I just assumed he was fine with it, he never shown any inclination of wanting to meet my co-workers, well except that one time last night. It is an idea I quickly supress. I don't like thinking about Marv in that way, because if I start then I won't be able to stop. "Having boy troubles?" It jerks me back to where I am. Marv happily hops past me, grabbing the bottle of vodka from under the counter. "I don't know." "What do you mean 'I don't know'?" "He doesn't want to talk about it... is that a bad sign?" "You are asking me? The longest lasting relationship I have is with my fridge, always gently purring when I come home after another one-night stand." "But you are... you know..." "I don't think I do." "Better versed in the world of the male/male communication." "Oh wouw, I never heard it put like that before. Well since you asked, I think we males are a little more direct, but don't underestimate our ability to hold a grudge and give you the silent treatment." "So he does not want to talk about it and I'm fucked." "Basically. Did you start the conversation or he?" "He did." "Then he has a secret." "How would you know?" "My best friend in high school used to do that. She would start a conversation and then cut it off, turns out she slept with the guy I had a crush on since forever." "But she's a girl" "Well we aren't that different as society wants us to believe." I flip the lever tapping a few beers and passing them on to the rather loaded looking racoon. "I'm sorry." "It's ok. He acted like he never even heard of her right after, typical jock action. She was devastated." "And yet you talk about it as if she just opened a window." "Technically it were her legs, and I was hurt, but I figured out a long time ago the world isn't really made for those who stick their heads in the sand and keep pining for straight people." "Yeah... right." So perhaps it wasn't about me not introducing my friends, but what else could it be? "I just don't get it, me and Aeson, I don't know, I figured we communicated better." "Communicated better then who, you and what's~her~face? And wait, his name is Aeson?" "Yes, me and Anne and yes his name is Aeson." I feel like an idiot, letting it slip. I feel... I feel like I just admitted to something major, though I'm not really sure what. Marv already knows that I am having sex with a guy, hell he knows how long, what he looks like, physically at least, he made me spill the beans as soon as he discovered I had met him again, and he knows, I think, how crazy I am about him. I chew on the inside of my cheek. Then why does it all feel so irreversible, so definitive, so... like I have started something that I cannot stop even if I wanted it to, like a boulder given that final nudge and is now rushing downhill. "So when are we going to meet your secret lover... Aeson?" That is why. Oh sky above, it's like opening Pandora's Box. Marv is like a dog with a bone, forgive the pun, when it comes to these things. He won't let it go until Aeson is right here in front of him to be scrutinised by those eyes of his, from top to bottom, left to right, in a way that never felt threatening back when it was my girlfriend, or potential male friends, but now that it is Aeson... I don't know. "You are not, at least not if I can help it." "Why? Is he that ugly?" "Oh it is not him." "You mean..." He looks at me, mock startled. "It is us?" "Just you." "Ouch!" I'm glad he takes it up so lightly, though I don't tell him the truth that it is kinda because of him, Marv, that I do not introduce them. What will happen if they do meet, what if Marv doesn't like Aeson, what if Aeson doesn't like Marv, or worse, what if they do like each other, you know like like and discover I am just a poor substitute for the other. I don't think I could bear that. I grab those feelings, forcing them back into their box and burying them deep, deep, deep inside of me. Don't think about that, don't think about that, don't think about that! "Why don't join us for lunch tomorrow?" We are cleaning up and the suggestion simply slips out. Marv stops with his sweeping and gives me a long look, seeming genuinely surprised. "You sure about that Rusky?" I don't immediately reply, betraying my feelings on the subject. "Yes I'm sure." "Sure you are ready for it, to subject your new love to my intensive... scrutiny." I roll my eyes. He is doing it to make me feel better no doubt, but for once I wish he would just leave the witty and slightly sexually tinted remarks for another time. "You want to or not?" "Sure." I try to keep my temper in check. I'm trying to do a good thing here, trying to show Marv he is a good friend, and letting him in on my secret, maybe then I can slowly ease the others in it as well. Ah fuck who am I kidding; I am trying to assure myself those two won't elope the moment they see each other, leaving me behind; just cold turkey, no hesitation. "You don't have to, you know." "I know. I want to," he gives me an odd look, "really I do." "Ok, what, when and where?" "Lunch I guess, about two, the little chicken place down the street." "Cool... Though I hope they have vegetarian foods... Meat still makes me nervous." I'm fidgeting again. I haven't been this bad since I last introduced... No when I... I think it was that time when I was about seventeen and I got arrested for drunk driving and I had to call my parents, who were having some function or another and I had to march through the living room with vomit still attached to my t-shirt. I think dad made me do that because he hoped it would scare me out of doing it again. It did... kinda. At least I never got arrested, or rather I did, after a bar brawl, but didn't have the courage to phone them. I spend the night in jail, not a fun thing. Aeson took my little lunch plan in his stride, as he seems to take everything, in his stride I mean. Me worrying about how to tell him all the way home seemed like a waste of time, afterwards. A simple 'sure' and it was settled, and now I'm waiting by the door, waiting for Aeson who isn't back yet from... well whatever it is, he has gone to. Probably back to his hotel or something, to get a change of clothes. Funny I have no idea what he does when I'm away, then again I never ask. I told him he could stay in my apartment. My relationship with him is a simple one, when I see him, I am happy, when I don't; I'm waiting for that moment I do get to see him. I don't care what he does in the meantime, or rather I don't think about it. I have no idea where he is staying, what he does for a living, what his phone number is. I don't even know if he has a phone. On another note, I need to ask him his number. I've told myself to ask him several times, but so far the moment I see him I forget. There are two very good reasons for it, one I am tired, and two... well... I don't think I have to spell that one out. "What are you smirking about?" "Just thinking." "About what." "Us.Sex." "Don't we have a lunch date with your best friend?" I look him in the eyes and I see that same odd mixture of affection and lust. Behind my lips my tongue darts over my chops. Cancelling is looking mighty good right now. I yank myself by the ears. I need to do this. "We need to go." He makes the most adorable little whine, somewhere in the back of his throat. "By the way do you have a phone?" "Err... sure but I don't use it often." "Not of those tech types, huh?" "That is one way of putting it." Glancing through the window I easily spot Marv reclining in one of the booths, his eyes already fixed on the tall wolf who is moving among the tables balancing a platter on his left paw. His gaze lingers just a tad too long on the tail that swishes past him, nearly dancing under his nose. It seems the rabbit has found his next victim. I have to clear my throat, rather loudly, to get him to notice us. "Ah there you are." He says casually as if he hadn't been eyeing up a guy's ass just a few seconds ago. "Hi Marv. Errr... Marv, may I introduce Aeson." I take a step to the side, allowing more room for Aeson to present himself. "Hi Marv, Swiff has told me a lot about you." Honestly I never dared to dream I would see Marv at a loss of words, and his reaction at meeting Aeson is... priceless. He doesn't say anything, he just gawks, his mouth hanging open, his eyes widening to proportions I never thought possible. Aeson's paw is hanging over the table and he waits, patiently, smiling in his trademark way, until Marv has recovered from the shock, or recover enough so he is able to shake the pup's paw. "Hu-Hi... I'm Marv." "So I figured." "Rusky's friend." He stares, a moment longer, before finally getting a hold of himself. "Please sit down!" We take our seats. Marv observes Aeson from the corner of his eye, as if at any moment the pup could turn out to be a ghost, disappearing into thin air the moment he blinks. "So you are the friend who has managed to turn my straight friend to the other side." "And you are the guy who I must thank for meeting him." "Only in a very indirect way." "Still, it was you who dragged him to that free for all." "I had thought he might find a few adventurous vixens, or I don't know, got his rocks off on something different." "He did, on, in and over." "Well anyways I never expected him to take one home." "Technically it was me who took one home, or ... his... home." "And what on earth did possess you to do that?" "Look at him." "I know he is cute, but, gods, have you seen his track record?" It is slightly uncomfortable sitting here, reduced to, what can only be considered as, the side-line of their conversation, while being the topic that is discussed, in growing detail. On the other paw it is good to see them getting along and trying to get to know each other, without necessarily being 'interested' in each other. Their exchange continues for some time and it is almost impossible to get a word in edge wise. It is like a match made in hell, two equally witty people, exchanging snappy retorts. Only when the wolf arrives to take their order their battle of the wits is interrupted. "Good to see you two like each other." I remark, casually. They both turn, like they have forgotten I am also here. When the food arrives the banter continues. There is little trace left of Marv's initial surprise. He's happily chatting away as if they have known each other for years. Men, music, parties, guys hitting on you, you hitting on guys. I look beside me at Aeson. Something tugs at my insides. For how many did he lift his tail? It is a little green monster sinking its nails into me. My eyes glide over his form. Many no doubt, a guy like him.... For some reason the idea both thrills and frightens me. "Now you have to answer me this," Marv leans forward, resting on his elbow, his voice dropping, "how big is it?" Aeson's lips curve upward almost immediately. They both cast a glance in my direction. "You really want to know?" Blissfully unaware my gaze shifts from one to the other. "I wouldn't ask you if I didn't." Again that look. "Oh, hey, wait, what?! No, he doesn't want to know that!" They laugh. The tips of my ears are glowing. "Awwww... he's adorable when he is embarrassed." Marv coos; trying to tickle me under my chin. I swat his paw away. "Yes he is." I blink, turning my gaze to Aeson. There is something in his eyes. Something I haven't seen there before. My stomach gives a sudden lurch. I try and say something, but my muzzle just opens and shuts without any sound coming out. He smiles, giving me a gentle nudge with his shoulder. "T-thanks?" He laughs, leaning forward giving me a smooch on the side of my muzzle. It leaves me dazed. Marv is staring at me, like somehow I am the most unique thing he has ever seen. It makes me feel that much more self-conscious. Yet in a sudden burst of courage I cease his paw, squeezing it, nuzzling the side of his ear. Marv's gaze is slowly shifting between me and Aeson. He hesitates, words burning on his lips, but he swallows them and instead focusses on his food. "This was certainly fun." We're standing on the corner of the street, cars zooming past us. Another three hours and Marv and I need to be at the club. "It was." Aeson and I share a look only people who are stupidly in love share, I think. "If you do not mind me I'm gonna go home. I need to leave early tomorrow morning." I had forgotten. He leaves tomorrow, early plane. Almost immediately I shift a bit closer needing to fight that urge to hold him close. "Don't worry," he looks up at me, giving me a wink, "I'll still be here when you get off from work." That is at least somewhat of a relief. "I need someone to drive me anyways." "Hey!" He laughs, the sting of his words immediately eased. "I need to change so; I guess I'll see you later and you," Marv points at me, "in three hours." "Goodbye Marv." I wrap my arm around Aeson, enjoying the warmth of his body next to me. "Make sure you wear a condom." "MARV!" "You're welcome."