"This is an intervention." I look around the people assembled around me in a semicircle. I must look ridiculous, mouth ajar, ears in that questioning 'five till two' position. 
"What?" They are all staring at me, which makes me wonder if they aren't just here because they think I committed a crime or am secretly dealing drugs. 
"An intervention, intervening, you know... intervention." Twist, the doe who passes flyers around town and spends her night mooching drinks from almost anyone, Dozer, the pitt who takes care of the electricity and the sound systems, Marv, Sigrund, and even Wei stand around me in a semi-circle, though Wei keeps himself to the background, before I should get the impression he actually cares.
"We won't let you go about ruining your life!"
"I really appreciate it guys but I don't think I need an..."
"You have fucked 7 girls in as many days. That is a lot, even for your standards."
"Even for his standard." A thumb points in the direction of Marv, who's doing the talking.
"Not helping."
"At this rate you'll get an STD and be in your grave in a matter of months."
"I'm fine, I just-"
"You are as fine as veal in a butcher shop."
"That is... disgusting."
"Bunny on a butcher's block?"
"Marv!"
"Well you get the idea."
"Guys I really don't need some intervention I do not need to be-"
"He's in denial!"
"Not everything can be explained by your community college psychology, Twist." Dozer grumbles, his arms crossed, big eyebrows furrowed.
"Well I am not the one with commitment issues."
"Yes you are! Just last week you-"
"Guys, guys can't we focus on the real issue at hand?" Marv gestured meaningfully in my direction. I wish he hadn't, it would have been fine by me if they had turned on each other and started to discuss their own issues, instead of trying to butt into mine.

	"Swiff, sweety," Twist, leans down, placing a comforting hand on my shoulder, like she would do with a child who doesn't understand what is going on the moment his pet has died, "It has been a week since you broke up, it is time to move on, but starting yourself on this suicidal path of destruction isn't the answer."
"First of all, I am not suicidal; second of all, we did not break up."
"Didn't I tell you, denial!" It would have been so much powerful if she just had managed to keep the smug triumph out of her voice... and hadn't pointed her finger almost up Dozer's nose when she proclaimed it.
"Of course he denies it, it doesn't mean he is in denial, and how the hell are you so sure they broke, up, huh? You weren't there." She falters, but only for a second before she turns it into a full blown verbal conflict. "Oh and I suppose you know what is going on, Mr I have a BA in electronics but am still stuck in this stupid club."
"I told you, I am looking for something better, and besides..."
I stop listening. The entire group evaporates while Dozer and Twist continue their argument. Wei is the first to leave, muttering something about needing to watch the door. Sigrund stares at him longingly before quietly trying to sneak out. Marv rolls his eyes, seeing his carefully laid plan going absolutely to hell.

	"Thanks for caring, but I need to make the bar in order." I feel kinda sorry for the rabbit, knowing he is trying and, I think, really cares. I hide behind the bar, choosing to clean the lowest shelves and reach as deep as I can manage. 
"I hope you do not really believe that everything is fine between the two of you... do you?" I withdraw my head from underneath the bar. He is leaning against the beer taps, his eyes flicker for a moment over my behind sticking out in a, I must admit, provocative way. I swish my tail through his field of vision, distracting him, drawing his gaze back to my face. '
"I know we fucked up." Admitting it leaves a bitter taste in my mouth, "but we didn't break up... technically." She left before we could, without a word. The moment I came home from work I found my apartment like it was, devoid of her feminine splatters. It felt odd, as mismatched as it had been, not to see it anymore. It is like the imperfections that you miss the moment they are gone. 
"You know who he is?" I lower my head, my ears pushed back. "Yeah... I found on him on MuzzleMag." I scoured her friends-page when she was out shopping. I found him, smiling at me in her most recent chat history. "He seems nice." I mutter, returning to my work. I told Marv about what happened, the next day, in a moment of insanity. I still do not quite know why I did, but it was a relief, somehow, not just to know, but tell someone about it. He hadn't said anything, just listened. 

	"I won't pretend you didn't have a paw in this yourself."
"I don't expect you to." I sit back, staring at the empty shelf in front of me. "I fucked up."
"You didn't help the matter; that is for certain." The next night I fucked another girl, and the night thereafter, and the night after that. I didn't even try to hide it from her anymore. "I am surprised she stuck with you that long." 
"Me to." Six days and four girls later and she was gone, and I felt empty and hollow inside. "She is a bitch for doing it, though you guys did agree."
"He is a law major... how am I going to compete with that?" 
"You don't." Honest truth, it stings, but I shouldn't be talking to Marv if I don't want some tough love. "Do you miss her?"
"No... Well... No... Not her... our routine, yes... despite all the fighting." 

	He rests his paw on my shoulder, sinking down on his knees. "Lately I have been feeling so numb... so empty." My voice quivers for some strange reason.
"And so you decide to fuck every female with a pulse that dares to step near you, smart move." I let my head drop against his shoulder. His shirt is soft, so unnaturally soft that I somehow never can achieve, unless I would buy a new shirt every day. "What is wrong with me?"
"A lot of things." There is that teasing undertone in his comment that makes me smirk despite myself. 
"Thanks for the support."
"You're welcome."
I settle closer, resting my forehead against his neck. I can feel his pulse beating under his skin. I take a deep breath, a shock wracking through my body. His paw gently slides up and down my back, an endless soothing motion. We're quiet. "You smell nice."
"Thanks." His paw stops. "You know what you need? Something different," I look up. He is smiling at me, his characteristic joyous smile that reveal his slightly extended front teeth, "a change of pace!"
"You seem to be a tad too happy about this." He wiggles his eyebrows. 
"C'mon it will be awesome." I can practically see the gears working in his mind. "Trust me?" I hesitate, eyeing him suspiciously. His eyes are twinkling. The moment I say yes he'll jump up and start yammering away, and I probably won't hear the end of it. For just a moment I sputter, until finally; "Fine, I trust you." 
"Sweet!" He jumps up, joyfully, his ears practically shuddering with excitement. Contrary to expectations he composes himself, looking down on me, eyes narrowed. "Yeah... yeah that will do." Without further explanation he leaves me behind in a state of confusion.



	After a week I think he has forgotten all about it, because he doesn't bring the subject up again, nor does he gives me those long pondering looks he gives me the first few days. Secretly I thank the gods that he has forgotten all about it, because Marv and I do not quite have the same tastes, to put it mildly. But of course I am not that lucky and one morning, I think it is about nine, still drunk with sleep and unable to find my watch, he is at my door, all chipper and bright and so annoyingly cheerful. And I am still in my boxers, eyes squinting against the morning light, hair tussled, fur uncombed, and with no doubt one badass morning breath; powerful enough to kill a small rodent. "Marv... what are you doing here?"
"I thought I'd stop by," I want to go back to bed, but I see that chance slipping through my finger as he invites himself in and curiously looks around my apartment, "and see how you are doing." He parks himself on the couch. "I hope I am not interrupting anything?"
"Just my sleep."
"Good." Silence. There is some expectation I am forced to meet, though I do not want to. The joy is shooting out of his eyes. It is obvious he is happy about something, very pleased with something he has accomplished or concocted, or whatever, and I am sure it has to do with me. Finally I cave. "You want something to drink?"
"Tea would be nice."
I head for the kitchen. "Don't have tea. I have coffee... more coffee, water, and milk." 
"A cup of boiling water please." Right about now I can strangle him as I bend over digging through my cupboard looking for the kettle that is no doubt still in its plastic wrapper somewhere way in the back behind all the other shit I have stuffed inside those damn cupboards because I never use the fucking thing. I hate tea. Finally I manage to drag it out of what might as well have been the apartment next door. I get up, slam it on the stove. Now where is that stupid whistling thing... forget it I'm not diving in there again. I'll have to keep an eye on it. I grab the coffee filters. "You know you could just have used the coffee machine, just don't put the filter in." Now he tells me. I decide his tone is far too pleasant. My upper lip trembles. I ignore it, though it requires me to use what little patience I have this morning. Too much coffee in the filter, too little water in the reservoir, I might as well be drinking cyanide. Forget it. I hit the switch. 

	It takes too long, everything takes too long. I nearly ruin the water, because of the missing tea kettle flute. The cups are unwashed, so I quickly rinse two of them before filling them up. Marv gladly accepts the cup, cradling it between his two paws, resting it in his lap. I take a sip and make a face. Horrible. "No overnight visitors I see." He remarks. I drop down at the other end of the couch. 
"Nope." 
"Miss her?"
"Nope... not anymore anyways." I sip my god awful coffee, noticing Marv's intense stare. "What?" 
He shakes his head. "Nothing." Though he keeps staring. I look down. 
"What?" 
"You know The Glee Club?"
"You mean those singing kids from back in high school... I think I know one or two, but-"
"No The Glee Club." He is enjoying my confusion, staring at me over the rim of his cup, seeing the gears in my head send spinning. Glee club, glee club, glee club???
"Never heard of them." 

	He leaves it hanging, not answering my questioning stares. "You waist 52?"
"50, why?" 
He shrugs, "no reason." Liar, the sparks of anticipation practically explode from his eyes setting anything in its vicinity on fire. I narrow my eyes, giving him a 'you are up to something and I know it aint no good' look, this only increases his enjoyment of having this scheme and leaving me groping around in the darkness. I shift uncomfortably, my tail tapping anxiously against the couch. He revels in it, sipping his warm water, enjoying my discomfort. I take a swig of coffee, the bitter taste killing every flavour. It is too much too fast, I make a face, my focus on Marv with his scheme's broken. 

	"So why did you stop by?"
"Just checking up on you, making sure you were ok. Making sure you cleaned up." He throws a meaningful look around the apartment, his eyes finally resting on me in my just awake and still groggy look. "Seeing if you were free next Friday." I raise an eyebrow. "We need to work next Friday." Friday is practically the busiest day of the week, apart from Saturday. "Not necessarily."
"Not necessarily?"
He smirks. "Not necessarily." I notice he is shifting back in his scheming state. All he needs is a white Persian cat and an evil laughter and he will be all set. "I talked to Wei, we can get off early."
"Now that is a first."
"I can be very persuasive."
"You didn't blackmail him did you?"
"Maybe." Oh gods. Please give me the old Marv back, this one is getting way too unsettling.

	He gets up, placing his cup on the coffee table. "So I see you Friday?" 
"Errr... sure... if I can get off." 
"No problem I'll take care of it."
"Ok, sure, Friday."
"Good," a smirk teases around the corners of his mouth, "Friday. See you later." I get up and just as unexpectedly as he had arrived he is leaving, letting himself out; leaving me confused, cold, and still kind of grumpy. He shuts the door. "I need some sleep." I mutter, heading back into the bedroom, flopping face first on the bed which by now has lost all its warmth.



	When I arrive at work Wei is giving me funny looks. By now it is Friday and after Marv's unexpected visit I haven't really heard from him again. That is until he joyfully bounces through the club towards me carrying a package, placing it with a graceful flurry in front of me. "Et voila!" he announces. I look up from my cleaning duties, raising an eyebrow. "This is for you."
"Thank you?"
"You are welcome. It's for our date tonight." Sigrund raises a brow, ears turning, tuning in on our conversation. I pick it up from the bar, weighing it in my paw. It's not that big, or heavy. 
"What is it?"
"You'll see. Promise me not to open it until I come and pick you up."
"I dunno Marv, you seem-"
"Promise me."
"Fine, fine I promise." 
His stern expression evaporates and he claps his paws in delight. "Good! It is going to be fantastic if I do say so myself." He practically hops off to do... whatever he is doing when he disappears out of my sight, leaving me with the package, guessing about its contents, wondering what on earth I have gotten myself into. 

	"W-What just happened?" Sigrund has been following the exchange from a distance and now approaches carefully like she would someone who is carrying a bomb. 
"I have no idea." I admit softly. She stares at the package, looks up at me, then back to the package. It is neatly packed in that brown postman paper, only it has no name, no logo; no indication what so ever what might be in there or where it is from. It can't be something big, the package is too small and too light for that. It might even be a trick played on my by Marv to see if I will open it, only to have him jump the trap on me later. It is something important, why else would he emphasise so badly on it. Perhaps it is clothes... but the thing is barely big enough to house a sweater, let alone something else. Does he have a secret crush on me and does it contain something... emotional? Marv doesn't really seem like a person who has a crush, or at least not one who would keep it a secret from anyone, including the supposed object of his crush. He has mentioned plenty of times he fancies me, no scrap that, mentioned he thinks 'I am hot'. But then again that is not necessarily any reason for him to spring this on me, 'cause he thinks lots of people are hot. 

	"What are you guys going to do together?" I think Sigrund is still trying to figure out whether or not I and Marv are going on a date, or just going to hang out.
"Again, not a clue." I look at her. She looks more confused than me, if that is even possible. 
"You know, he is up to something"
"No shit, really?" 
She gives me that annoyed look she normally saves for Marv when he is teasing her about one thing or another and won't quit, despite she has asked him to a dozen times before.
"Are you going to open it?" Her question has been on my mind ever since I got it. I'm curious, but also a tad unsure I actually want to know what is in there.
"No." He made me promise. As lame an excuse as you are ever going to get it, but right now as good as any as I can come up with. Marv has some big plan that he thinks will alleviate my dark mood and I don't feel like raining on his parade. If it is really that bad as I fear it might be I can always cut it short halfway through, if it is really as good as Marv believes it will be, why on earth would I risk it by not even trying. It cannot be any worse than what I am doing now, sitting at home, sleeping, not cleaning, watching telly, jerking off and almost obsessively checking her MuzzleMag's page to see what she is talking about and with whom, dying a little bit every time I see him liking something, or making a witty comment. 

	I have decided, taking the package and placing it with my other stuff, before I forget it. "No, I'll guess I will see what he has up his sleeve." She frowns, arms crossed, looking very much the part of the angry den mother. 
"Good." 

	I am still pondering what she meant with that last 'good' when I walk back to my apartment, Marv's 'gift' safely tugged underneath my arm. Is she in on this? Nah probably just happy to see I am not sitting around moping. They do have a point, I have been no fun the last two weeks, correction make that three weeks... perhaps a month... maybe two, for some time now. My tail swishes back and forth happily and I realize that I am actually looking forward to Marv's crazy plan. I place it on the coffee table before deciding to take a shower and wash the bar grime out of my fur. Dumping my clothes in the hamper I realize it has been almost a week (maybe even two) since I last... well... 'took someone out back'. Perhaps Marv has set me up with a blind date. Gods I hope not, most blind dates end up being awkward and weird and spend with someone who might have the same interests as you, at first glance, but doesn't appeal at all. And besides it is not like Marv has all these single girlfriends that he hangs out with. From what I have seen Marv... come to think of it Marv doesn't seem to have many friends at all, apart from his co-workers, though we only hang out during work hours... mostly. Perhaps he keeps his social life well hidden from us, but why? He seems to know everyone, but I never actually have seen him 'hang out' with anyone.

	Just as I am rinsing the last of the shampoo out of my fur the doorbell rings. That must be him. He told me he would "pick me up later". Wrapping a towel around my waist I go and open the door, and as sure as snow in winter; "Hi Rusky." He does not wait but invites himself in like he did last time.
"Hi Marv." 
"I see you are almost ready, good. You haven't opened it?" He sounds surprised. 
"You made me promise not to." His joyful smile gets that much bigger, getting a mischievous edge around the corners. He hops over the coffee table, grabbing the package, tossing it up, catching it before passing it to me. 
"Here you go, open it." 

	For a moment of uncertainty I look at him, package in my paws. I begin to pick at the tape. Finally I just work my fingers between the paper and tear it off. It's a box, white cardboard, nothing special. I look up at him. With a quick gesture he urges me on. I open it. I raise an eyebrow while fishing out a mask, and something made of cloth. I look up. I see Marv has put on a similar mask, smiling brightly. "What is it?" I ask him. 
"Your costume." His tone saying: what did you think it was? I raise an inquisitive brow, looking at the small folded piece of, what is apparently passes as a 'costume'. With a whirl he sheds his coat, dropping it on my sofa. My eyes widen in shock, I stare at him open-mouthed, bug-eyed and paralyzed. In all the time I have known him I have never seen him so radiant and triumphant as in this moment, like a god descending from Olympus, illuminating the world with his power, strength and beauty. He has managed to shock and befuddle me and he is revelling in it.
