[b]Uber Carry Part 15 – Rightsizing[/b]


"I, uh..." When Perry reached the end of the three-page information paper that his boss handed him together with the instruction to go over it straightaway, the cat was left confused and with quite a few questions. The document, probably composed by one of Mr. Hollard's many clerks just for Perry to read, contained a brief job description along with a list of corresponding fields of work and some more key data. The job in question was an entry-level position in the marketing department. Puzzled Perry looked up to address his boss, who meanwhile was occupied with scribbling something on a notepad. "I'm sorry, Sir, but... I'm not sure what I'm supposed to do with this," he admitted eventually.

Returning his attention to the cat standing in front of his desk, Hollard simply asked, "Could you see yourself working in such a position?"

Perry thought for a moment. The document was written like a job ad anyway, although a particularly honest one. The work described in it was pretty general stuff, but interesting enough. It was a regular job and not something out of the cat's qualifications either. "Erm, I think I could, but..."

"I'll set you up for a trial period then," the Rottweiler stated flatly, flipping a page on the notepad to write some more down. "Should start next month. You'll get all the deets later."

Taken aback, the feline blinked at the rather final statement. "W-wait a second," Perry blurted unusually unrestricted for him. "Are you offering this position to me?" he asked and got a brief 'hm-mm' from the dog. "But... I'm already working as your personal carrier. Why this sudden change?" Nervously the timid feline came a measured step closer. "D-did... did I mess up somehow? I thought you were satisfied with my work?"

"Oh, I am satisfied with you, Perry!" Hollard confirmed, finally putting his pen down to look straight at the cat. He folded his large hands and propped his elbows up on the desktop, posture slightly stooped forward. Uh-oh, this was his business pose! And he used Perry's name too, instead of his usual terms of endearment (or belittlement). "Do you have any academic degree past your high school diploma?"

Perry was confused by the question, but answered nonetheless, "No."

"Any work experience outside your carrier job? Vocational training? A course?"

The tabby cat suddenly felt spoken down to. He was not an academic, no, but he was coming up in the world. Perry actually knew this was just Mr. Hollard's general attitude and harshness, but he still felt the need to somehow defend himself. "I briefly worked at a convenience store after high school."

"Tell me, Perry," Hollard asked next, "do you have any plans for your future?" The feline remained silent for far too long. "Do you seriously intend to carry around fat, old dogs for the rest of your life?"

Meekly, the tabby avoided his gaze. "I'm quite content with my job here..."

"And I'm going to make good use of you for the time to come!" the dog clarified confidently. "But sooner or later you'll grow out of this profession. What if your health won't allow it any longer? What if you grow old? Do you want to haul people around until you're sixty?! You need to find a career that can support you in the long run. Do you even have a retirement plan?"

Perry shook his head awkwardly. He didn't have much money to put aside before he worked for Mr. Hollard. And afterwards, well... he was young and wanted to live.

"I'll have Limon set one up for you then. Anyway. This job will offer you new possibilities, even if you chose not to stay in the marketing field. You will learn a trade, gain experience an--"

"KSHHH-Sir, Coal is here and would like to meet you," a female voice suddenly announced over the crackling intercom, interrupting the Rottweiler's train of thought.

"Hm? Why would he come here? Could've just called..." Hollard wondered as he leaned over to press the button on his device. "Send him in." Focusing back on the cat, he went on, "Believe it or not, but I'm not the kind of boss to put his workers through the grinder, or to waste potential. I think this job will be good for you and might be your first step up in this company, if you throw yourself into it. And don't worry, you'll still get more than enough chance to work under me directly. I need my carry boy, after all!"

"That's..." Perry swallowed, overwhelmed with joy and gratitude. "I don't know what to say..."

"How about something like: 'Thank you for being the greatest boss in the world'?"

"That you definitely are!" Perry agreed, his tail flicking happily behind him. "Thank you for this chance, Sir. I promise, I will continue to work hard for you!"

In that moment the door to the office behind them swung open and the black and white husky came in. He wore a thin file under his arm and a sorry expression on his face. Furthermore Coal was clad in a rather formal outfit, slacks and a beige shirt, sans tie. He approached his boss measured, but in a determined fashion.

"Why are you here?" the Rottweiler asked outright, followed by, "And what about the getup?"

Finally halting in front of Hollard's desk, right beside the feline, Coal likewise forwent a greeting and instead explained, "I'm sorry if I'm interrupting you, but I thought this would be the appropriate way to go at this. I wanted to handle this with the due professionalism, so..." A bit stiffly he handed the file he had brought with him over to the Rottweiler and declared, "I'd like to hand in my resignation, Sir."

Perry looked at the husky in shock, as if the mere thought of quitting one's job with Mr. Hollard was a sacrilege. The older canine, however, kept a straight face and accepted the resignation letter silently. He flipped the document open, took a brief glance and then put it down on his desk. "Of course this comes all in one chunk..." the dog sighed sulkily to himself. Coal and Perry looked at each other confused, before Hollard went on, "Alright, then let's get it over with the last of the lot as well, while we're at it..." Pulling out his phone, the dog tapped on it for a moment, before he send a voicemail, "Limon. To my office. Now."

"Does... that mean you accept my resignation?" Coal asked carefully.

"Well, it's not like I could force you to stay," the Rottweiler said bluntly and thus came as close as he probably ever would to admitting that he didn't exactly want the husky to leave. At least openly. "Though I'd at least like to know why you want to leave on such short notice. And without consulting me first about it. I assume you have a new job lined up already? Or, knowing you, a new employer in particular, yes?"

The husky's white-tipped ears flicked nervously. "Erm, yes..." Coal admitted, scratching himself behind his neck. "I met him a while ago and, uh... we sorta stayed in contact and... he invited me to come to his place to, ehe... intensify our... collaboration. I would've talked to you about it, but, uhm... he demanded my discretion, since--"

"It's Luke Pierce," Hollard concluded, sharp as ever.

"... it's Luke Pierce..." Coal admitted with a slight blush.

With a resigned sigh, the Rottweiler's gruff facial expression sagged under this humiliating revelation. "Ugh, why do you have to do this to me, Coal? With him, of all people!" he asked, not really expecting, or caring for an answer. Instead he focused on Perry to make sure something like this wouldn't happen again. "See?!" he scoffed, pointing at the husky. "This is what happens if you live for the day and don't have a plan: You'll end up bowing to the meanest, lousiest, most cunning pussy that will have you! And embarrass me all the way down!"

Coal couldn't suppress a small chuckle. What an irony that, on his way out the door, he would be the one to humiliate Hollard for a change. Of course he knew already that the old dog wouldn't exactly take kindly to loosing him to Luke, but, "That's just how the business goes, isn't it?"

Leaning back in his chair, Hollard grumbled, "I'll never hear the end of this. The damn lion will make sure of it!" Focusing back on the smirking husky, Hollard barked, "Wipe that dirty smile off your face, pup! You're still working for me until that resignation takes effect. And you can be sure that I won't go easy on you during your last days! And don't even dream about a gratuity!"

"Of course, Sir," Coal chuckled. "I didn't expect anything else from you."

"Looks like now you'll have to shoulder even more extra work, Perry," the Rottweiler mused, eyeing his scrawny, feline carry boy over. "With Coal leaving, I'll have to rely on you even more. I hope you're ready and willing to fill in for this little backstabber?"

The tabby cat swallowed. Maintaining a day job and working extra hours in his already more than demanding position as Hollard's personal carrier and attendant? Gosh, that sounded arduous! "I'll... do my best to meet your expectations, Sir!" Perry promised dutifully.

"Since you're so eager to load my work on him already," Coal interjected. "I'd say it's only fair if you adjust his salary accordingly!"

While Perry looked confused, Hollard laughed. "Rare for you to take up the cudgels for someone else. Are you getting charitable on your final days here?"

"Well, someone's gotta take care of the greenhorn," Coal joked with a wink as he wrapped his arm around the tabby cat and pulled him closer into an overstated hug of camaraderie. "He's just too gentle to assert himself with you. And you're clearly underpaying him for the slave labor you put him through!" 

"You just said it yourself, he's still just a greenhorn!" Hollard countered evenly.

But the husky didn't falter. "Just a figure of speech. He's been working here over a year already. Pay this cat what he's worth!"

Perry, cautiously silent so far, winced when his boss's sharp, dark eyes suddenly settled on him. "So you want a raise, huh?" the old dog asked, his features rigid as stone. Perry swallowed intimidated and was about to shake his head, when the husky holding him tight shot ahead.

"That's right!" Coal stated. "If you double his work, double his pay check!"

Another laugh from the Rottweiler echoed through the room. "Okay, maybe a little recognition for Perry's esteemed work so far is in order. I'll give him a three percent raise."

"Twenty!" Coal butted in again. "At least!"

"Three and a half. And that's only because he knows how to behave, unlike certain other individuals of my staff."

"Fifteen!" Coal countered, apparently very set on getting into the Rottweiler's fur. "C'mon, Perry! Tell him you demand a pay raise. You gotta hit back at the old man from time to time, so he treats you fairly. Tell him yourself. Tell him you want fifteen percent."

"Ah- b-but I..." Poor Perry fell silent again when he sensed his boss's eyes on him again. He couldn't ask something this big from Mr. Hollard. Let alone demand it!

Pressing his grinning muzzle closer to the tabby cat's ear, Coal whispered, "Go on, say it. He won't bite your head off. He just wants to hear it from you."

Nervously Perry looked at the husky, then back at his boss, who was sitting behind his large desk expectantly. "... f-fi... fifte--" A push from the dog at his side stopped him in his futile attempt and shoved him even closer to the waiting Rottweiler.

"Louder! Not even Limon could've heard that!" Coal instructed. "Just say, I demand fifteen percent!"

Timidly Perry crumbled under his boss's gaze. Why did this feel like asking for his first born? "I de..." Swallowing down his awe for a brief moment, Perry clutched his wrist and finally said, "Sir, I demand fifteen percent... p-please..."

While Coal crowed that this wasn't such a hard thing to say with a slap on the feline's back, Mr. Hollard remained still and stared the cat down with a difficult to read expression. Eventually, though, the Rottweiler spoke. "You get ten percent," he said in a measured, gruff tone. "And that's my last word on the matter. Any more haggling and you can leave together with the husky."

"Yes, Sir!" Perry acknowledged, stiff as a poker, hackles raised with fear. Did this guy just get him in trouble? "Thank you, Sir!"

"You know what?" Hollard scoffed in Coal's direction. "Now that I think about it, I'm actually glad to get rid of you."

Before the grinning canine could bite back, the office's door behind them clattered and a small, yellow fennec came strolling in. His eyes briefly flicked from Perry to their boss, before lingering on Coal for a noticeably longer moment. "Did I miss something?" he asked with a jaunty smile.

Coal was about to answer (probably with an exaggerated tale of how heroically he defended Perry's interests against their capitalistic boss man), when Hollard took his chance for vengeance by doing something he knew the husky hated: Being shown up in front of Limon. "Nothing important, just Coal quitting his job so he can slave away for Luke."

The husky's smile faded just as quickly as Limon's widened. "What?! No way!" the tiny fox crowed as he arrived in front of Hollard's desk. Looking up at the husky beside him, his huge ears were cocked forward belligerently. "After he wrecked you at our little getaway, I would have thought you'd be glad to maintain some distance to the lion. Didn't know you was that much of an masochist! Hm, well at least you're living up to your own sermons!"

"Shut up..." Coal grumbled, attempting to murder the desert fox with his despising gaze.

"What? I meant that as a compliment! And I'm seriously glad for you for finding a better employer. Erm, sorry, bigger employer, hehe!"

"You do realize I'm still going to be around for a few more weeks, right? Plenty of time to make my farewell's with you!"

The bickering continued for a while, probably only because Hollard enjoyed the husky's misery as revenge more than he found his and Limon's back and forth annoying. Though eventually the fennec dropped the subject and regarded his boss. "Anyway, as glad as I am for getting to know about Coal's... change of employment first hand, I doubt this is the reason you called me here. So, what's the matter, boss?"

Suddenly silent, Coal's white-tipped ears rose with curiosity. A fact neither Limon, nor Hollard missed. "Well, considering I've already been through some occupational reorientations with these two," Hollard said and pointed into Coal and Perry's direction, before adding, "Some more planned than others... I thought it might be just as good a chance as any to fill you in on my plans regarding your future here. Or rather said your future somewhere else." Quite content with himself, Hollard let the ominous comment linger in the room to keep the three, but mostly Coal, in suspense. Then, as if suddenly realizing the gathering crowd in his office, the old Rottweiler scoffed, "What? Is this a fucking circus show? Why are you two still here? Get back to work, or whatever!"

Apologizing himself repeatedly, Perry submissively bowed out of the room, while Coal followed him reluctantly. He'd find out eventually what his boss's plans for the fox were. One way or another...

When the door fell shut again and Limon was sure Coal was well out of earshot, he pulled up a chair and took a seat, before asking, "What was that supposed to mean? My future somewhere else?"

Calmly, Hollard explained, "After due deliberation, I came to the conclusion that your engagement with this company, while greatly esteemed, has reached a certain... limit. And with enough talent at the ready to take over your position as head accountant, I thought it might be time for you to pursue a new, possibly larger career goal. One this company could hardly offer you."

With a raised eyebrow and even higher raised ears, Limon wet his lips before, after a moment of consideration, he asked, "Are you just pulling my leg, or did you finally decide to fire me after all?"

"You're not getting fired," the dog confirmed. "You'll still work here and break in your successor, for the time being. But I've pulled some strings and secured you the chance for a promising position. At a different company."

"So you do want to get rid of me?" Limon assumed. "If that's the case, you could've just told me. No need to pass me along, like you're doing me a favor. I'd be good on my own!"

"Of course you would. I know that," Hollard confirmed, folding his hands on his desk. "But I'm neither passing you along, nor do I want to get rid of you. See it more as... outsourcing your talents for a while, to expand your horizon. I've already arranged a meeting with your potential new employer. He's quite eager to get to now you."

Taken aback, Limon murmured, "You mean, there's already someone..." A pang of anger rose in the tiny guy. "I told you before, I'm not that kind of fox! If you think I'll--"

"Relax!" Hollard raised his hands defensively. "It's not that kind of deal. It's a legit job! Plus some potential complaisances, should you agree to that. Which, knowing you, you will."

Ignoring the old dog's sassy remark, Limon tipped his large ears forward and stared his boss down. "Who is it?" he demanded to know. "I swear, if you're even considering a fuckwit like Atkins, I'll--"

"It's not Atkins," Hollard interposed vehemently. Then a bit calmer, "You haven't met him yet, but I'm sure you two will get along fine. In any case, what you do is entirely your decision. I can open a door for you, but I don't intend to shove you through it."

"Who is it?" Limon demanded again.

"You'll know when you see him. The meeting is on the twenty-second, I'll send you a message."

Realizing his boss's scheme, Limon's features sagged and he let out a frustrated sigh. "You're seriously going to let me play the guessing game for three weeks on this? Boy, that's harsh, even for you."

"You'll manage. You usually do."

With a cheeky glance up at his boss, the fox dropped his ears a bit. "Isn't there any chance I'll get his name out of you, boss?" The dog looked enticed, but stuck to his guns. Limon lowered his ears further. "I could suck you off?" he offered, feigning shyness.

The Rottweiler shrugged. "It might be worth a try."

"Only if you tell me!" the fennec pressed, literally and figuratively at the edge of his seat.

"No."

Quickly returning to his sassy self, Limon jumped off the chair and made to turn. "Alright then. If you will excuse me, I have a department to run." Swaying his short, yellow tail dismissively, Limon headed for the door.

"Actually...!" Hollard announced loudly to make the fox stop. Leaning back in his big, comfortable executive chair, the dog went on, "You do what I tell you. And right now, I'm telling you that I'm expected at a conference in an hour..."

"So...?" Limon asked indifferently over his shoulder.

"So you will instantly move your insolent, little ass over here and make sure I look presentable!" the canine grumbled and then, in a cocky, patronizing manner, propped both his black leather dress shoes up on the edge of his desk.

The fox frowned when he took in the overbearing sight. "Wouldn't that job be more suitable for your cat? I'll fetch him on my way out." Though instead of a witty response, the Rottweiler only maintained eye-contact with a demanding expression. "Look, boss, I seriously need to get the numbers for the Barlowe report. I have to hand this in today!" Limon urged, taking a step backwards towards the door.

"If you don't want to get demoted to a filing clerk and refill copy paper for the rest of your time in this company," Hollard boomed in his deep, stern voice, "you lick my shoes clean, fox! NOW!"

Limon swallowed, his huge, proud ears drooping. "Yes, boss..." he murmured and reluctantly dragged himself over to the snooty dog. Propped up like this, Limon wouldn't be able to reach the shoes properly when he kneeled down, so he didn't have much of a choice and remained standing. With his hands on the edge of the desk, he leaned over and...

"Start with the soles!"

Mere inches before his tongue touched with his boss's toecap, Limon stopped and let out the breath he was holding. "Y-yes, boss..." he said with folded ears, then receded some until he could see the man's broad, slightly worn leather soles. With disgust he pressed his petite tongue against the smooth surface and began to lick his boss's shoes.

With Limon where he wanted him, Hollard leaned over and picked up the receiver of his intercom. "Give me Jefferson from the accountant department, please," he instructed his secretary and within a minute was connected with the desired person. "I'm calling to inform you of a few upcoming changes. Limon will be working off-site a lot in the foreseeable future, which leaves his position here rather vacant. I've decided to promote you to become the new chief accountant in his stead. Permanently!" he pronounced the last word as he looked into the angered eyes of the fox licking his shoes. "Limon will still be around and work you in, but you're going to take over by the end of next month." After a few more words and once Jefferson was done expressing his thanks, the Rottweiler hung up with an, "I expect a smooth transition. I'll hear from you. Bye!"

"Did you really have to do this...?" Limon asked before he pressed his tongue back against the damp leather sole. As if this task wasn't humiliating enough already. He didn't even accept this new job yet - hell, he didn't even know what this job was exactly, let alone with whom - and he was already replaced for good and that while giving his boss's stuffy dress shoes a tongue bath! Now he wouldn't only have to spend what would remain of his lunch break after this with filth and the taste of leather in his muzzle, but also the time he still had in this company by working in the guy that would replace him. That figures!

Oh well, maybe his new potential boss would hold a better lot for Limon...