Alex didn't remember how he reached his apartment. He had been before the Luminex building, looking up at it, the sun shone in his eyes, and now he was before his door. How had he gotten into the building without his ID card? He didn't have a sense of how he might have done that.

    For a moment he wondered how he'd get in his apartment, he still didn't have his ID, then he remembered the building attendant had taken his biometric information for such a case. would it still be in the system? There was only one way he'd find out.

    He pressed his hand on the plate where he'd normally waved his ID. The plate blinked then turned green. The door opened, and he stood before the opening.

    He should go in, but he couldn't move. His heart beat fast, He didn't want to go in, he'd spent enough time locked in a room already. he knew he couldn't stay in the hall, if nothing else his things were in the apartment. His stomach growled. Food was in the apartment. That thought made him cross the threshold.

    The door closed and the silence enveloped him. Tears fell, and he forced them to stop. he didn't want to cry anymore. he'd expected Jack to come greet him. He wouldn't cry over him being gone. He couldn't change that so he wouldn't cry about it.

    He ignored the boxes littering the living room, the only things there. The corporation hadn't left his apartment alone, they'd taken everything out, and now brought it back, but they didn't put anything back where it belonged.

    He opened the fridge and was relieved to find it full, and with recent food. At least they had done that. He took out the fruits and vegetables and ate them, moaning at the rich taste. When he was done with that he found ready to eat meats and devoured them. He had to stop after that, even though he wanted to eat the desserts, he felt sick.

    he sat on the floor and waited for it to pass. He'd over eaten. After months of minimal food, he'd stuffed himself and his body was protesting. He'd have to pace himself from now on.

    When he felt he could move he went through the boxes and found the linens for the bed. He made it and found he was tired. He didn't understand why, he'd already spent a lot of time sleeping, but he laid down. he pulled the covers to him and breathed them in.

    Even though he'd told himself he wouldn't cry anymore, he did. Jack's scent had been erased from them. He fell asleep crying. Jack had been taken from him. he was alone. he would always be alone.

    * * * * *

    Alex woke up to the sound of movement. "Jack?" he called. "Is that you? have you come back?" He opened his eyes. There was someone silhouetted in the doorway. The form was tall and broad shouldered. "Jack, what's wrong?"

    The form took a step into the bedroom and Alex could see the fur so dark it was almost black rather than brown and the speckling of white through it. Alex smiled at him, but the hardness of the stare that looked back at him wiped the smile off.

    "Jack doesn't exist," The Samalian said. 

    "You're lying, You're right there."

    The alien took another step forward. "I'm not Jack. I'm Tristan." He was by the bed now, looking down on Alex. "I wore him to get close to you. You were so stupid you never saw through my disguise. you'd gotten an alien to fuck you and that's all you cared about."

    "No! I love you Jack!"

    The Alien grabbed him by the neck and pulled him up. "Wake up, you stupid human. There's no one there for you to love. And if Jack had been real, you think he'd want a weakling like you? You gave up on him. You were going to give him up."

    "No, I would never do that to him."

    The Samalian laughed. It was a cruel sound. "Don't lie to me. I know the truth. You care more about saving your skin then him. I have him locked up in my head, where you'll never get to him."

    "Let him go. Please. I'll do what ever you want. Please give him back to me."

    He laughed again. "Anything I want? or what you want? If I fuck you, will you give him up?"

    "No. I'll never give up. I'm going to get him, I'm going to save him from you."

    "You think a sniffling thing like you has any chance against me? The only thing waiting for you if you come after me is death. If I had been less cruel, I would have killed you when I left, but I want you to suffer, to know that Jack's mine forever."

    "No, give him back to me."

    The Samalian pulled him close and whispered in his ear. "Come get him, if you think you're strong enough." He then threw him on the bed.

    * * * * *

    Alex's eyes snapped open. He wanted to scream. He didn't want it to be true. he couldn't have been fooled like that. Jack had to have been real, he loved him too much for it to be otherwise.

    The voice that had hounded him early in his incarceration was mercifully silent, but that only told him he didn't need it anymore. As much as he wanted to deny it, he knew it was true. He'd been used by the Samalian named Tristan.

    He forced himself up. He threw the clothes he was wearing away and showered. He had to Look through many of the boxes for a change of clothing. The corporation hadn't bothered marking any of the boxes as to what they contained, and who ever had boxed his things hadn't bothered putting related item together.

    That's how he found the hologram.

    He hadn't made any recording of Jack. He hadn't thought about it, he'd been too happy just being with him. This one had been a spur of the moment thing. Jack hadn't even known about it. he'd taken this on one evening when they were walking through the park. Alex had gone to buy them snacks and as he came back Jack had been standing there, looking at the sky thoughtfully. He'd taken the recording there, and had transfered it to this holographic base. His plan had been to get one taken of himself, and make it a match set and present them to Jack, but he'd fallen sick, and then Tristan had come.

    He held the base against his chest. He'd have that reminder of Jack. He might know he hadn't been real, but he wanted to hang on to the memory.

    Not long after that he found the statue. The reproduction of the Defender. Alex smiled at the memory of the game they played at the market, each buying an inexpensive gift for the other.

    He didn't allow the threatening tears to flow.

    because he had to take so much out of the boxes to find something to wear, he spent the rest of the day putting his things away. Once he was done, he ate.

    After his second plateful he forced himself to stop. He wanted more, he was still hungry, but he didn't want to be sick. He looked around, the place looked like it was his again, but it didn't feel like it.

    He got out, almost forgetting his ID, which had been in one of the boxes. He hadn't believed he'd been able to stay in that place all day, without Jack. Keeping busy had allowed it. He walked for a time then realized he was at the transit station. he'd come here without thinking about it, but he didn't have anywhere to go.

    That wasn't true. He headed to Alienation. He wanted a place he'd feel at home. He wanted familiar voices and sound.

    The clinking of glasses and the thrum of indistinct voices made him smile. He went directly to the bar. Some of the aliens he bumped into grumbled, others nodded to him.

    "Alex," Alphalar greeted him, putting a drink before a scaly insectoid being. "Where have you been? It's been so long since you dropped by I though you'd abandoned us." He placed a tall glass with amber liquid before Alex.

    Alex looked at it and fought back tears. It was the same drink he'd spilled when he met Jack.

    "Hey Alex, are you okay?"

    He shook his head. "I lost someone."

    One of Alphalar's tentacle came to rest on my hand. "I'm sorry to hear that. Did he? Was it difficult?"

    Alex nodded.

    "At least you can take comfort in the knowledge that he's at peace now. the universe will look after his spirit."

    He stared at the Jolarnian. Alex knew he meant to comfort him, but his words just served as a reminder that Jack had no spirit, that he hadn't been real.

    Alex stood. "I'm sorry, this was a mistake." he turned and took a step, them stopped, the memory of Jack bumping into him, making him spill his glass hitting him.

    When he was able to move he hurried through the crowd, pushing them out of his way, not caring about the curses he received. He fought the tears the entire trip to his apartment. He didn't want to cry anymore. He lost that fight as the door to his apartment closed behind him.

    * * * * *

    Alex felt strange going back to work. The guard didn't look up from his station as he swiped his ID and entered the building. The other employees also ignored him. He was a face in a sea of faces. That changed when he reached his floor and the workers there knew him.

    There, he was greeted with smiles and hugs. told it was good that he was back, that it was good the company had paid his medical bills.

    Confused,	Alex made noncommittal responses and worked at piecing together what they meant. It sounded like he'd been sick, something so grave they hadn't been allowed to visit him. With that he was able to play the role better, thanking them for the good thoughts, but he dodged explaining what happened by telling them he didn't want to relive it. With grave nods they said they understood, and Alex settled back into his work.

    It proved easier than he expected. Attacking the systems he was instructed to gave him something to focus on other than his sense of loss, of betrayal. He was very effective, he'd always been good, but now he unleashed his anger on them, cutting through their defenses and protest without mercy. He only left his desk for food, large portions at the cafeteria, and bathroom breaks.

    Late in the day a series of gasps made Alex look up. he'd just finished ransacking a competitor's data storage. the information had been sent to another department where they would extract what they needed.

    An older man was walking through the room as if he owned it. He wore an expensive and perfectly cut gray suit, but Alex didn't know him. Maybe he was a visiting client. It didn't involve him so he went back to work, checking which system was next on his list.

    Alex had just established contact with it when someone cleared his throat behind him. it was the older man. He extended his hand to Alex.

    "Mister Crimson, I'm very happy you came back to us." Alex stood and took the hand.

    The man placed his other one on over it. "If there's anything you ever need, please don't hesitate to let me know." He gave Alex a warm smile and left.

    Alex watched his back disappear and sat down, utterly confused. He saw his coworker, Allan, staring at him.

    "What?" Alex said.

    "Don't you know who that was?"

    "No, should I?"

    "I guess not. You weren't here when it happened." 

    "What happened?"

    "We were attacked," The woman on his other side said, "two weeks ago. We had to evacuate the building. From what I heard someone made it all the way to the president's office and killed a lot of people getting there."

    "Not long after that we got a new president," Allan added. 

    "I think it was a coup," the woman said. "Someone hired a mercenary to take out the old president."

    Another woman stood, this one Alex knew, Marie. "I heard it was a vendetta. A feud of some sort."

    "That doesn't make sense," Allan replied, "Who would pick a fight with the company?"

    "A corporation like ours has to have pissed off enough people one of them is going to have the resources to do something about it. What do you think Alex?"

    "I think I need to get back to work." They stared at him. "I've been gone for a while, I can't afford to slack."

    "I was just asking your opinion, not trying to get you in trouble."

    "I know, but I have work to do." had he been more harsh then he'd intended? he couldn't tell. And in the following silence they all sat down.

    Their comments nagged at him, and once home he did a search on the attack. They had been right, someone had forced his way through the building to the administrative floor, killing anyone who tried to stop him. They didn't name him, or provide a picture, but Alex figured it was Tristan. That was why they had questioned him so hard.

    He tried to forget about it. He didn't care about company politics, so the attack shouldn't matter to him. He hadn't known who the president was before, and he didn't know who he was now. The man had shaken his hand for some reason, but Alex didn't know him.

    But he couldn't forget about it. over the following days he kept returning to it, Tristan had used him to get in. Why had the alien picked him? Why did Alex still feel a connection to Jack?

    Each evening he tried to find more information on Tristan, but there was little on the open network. He was a criminal, he'd been wanted by the law on multiple planets, but there was no details. Alex found indications they had been there at one time, but it had been erased.

    He tried to trace who had done it, but his house system wasn't powerful enough to force the nodes to cooperate with him. He needed something more powerful, like the company systems.