As soon as Elias Acorn assumed the crownship of the Kingdom of Acorn, he also inherited a problem that he didn’t even know was a problem Whilst his father had been King.
His throne was too small for him.
Even approaching his throne, the new king could tell that he and his new seat would be at odds.
As with his sister, Sally, and as with his mother, Alicia: Elias Acorn has a stupidly fat ass. Where it came from, nobody quite knew, but it was both a big-booty blessing and a callipygian curse.
The throne was made of two elegantly-carved slabs of mahogany – one for the back, and one for the seat and arms. Draped over the back was a blue cloth bearing the symbol of the House of Acorn.
He came up to it, turned about and attempted to sit.
His cheeks couldn't even touch the cushion on the royal seat – instead, those big brown buttocks got sandwiched between the mahogany arms, creating an impassable blockage that held him up as he tried to sit.
The wood creaked and groaned, the whole structure of it – unaccustomed to such demanding weight – bent outwards, but still it would not allow it’s new owner in.
So he’d commissioned a new one.
“Aaaaah!” Elias sighed with satisfaction, sitting his fat ass down on his newly commissioned throne. The crimson cushions beneath him had been exquisitely constructed and fluffed for maximum comfort, and the whole throne had now constructed from a single piece of wood, thus stopping the creaking and complaining because of the taxing weight.
But easily the best feature would be the fact that the throne had no arms, allowing the King’s chocolate asscheeks free rein to spread out, and spread they did: ass meat spilled out on both sides and out the back of the chair, as though someone had put thick chocolate pudding into an industrial press.
Elias ground his ass into the cushion, relieved in his choice of seating arrangement. So comfortable…
“Sire!” A royal messenger came into the throne room now. “Your sister has requested your presence in her dressing room.”
Elias sighed. Just as he’d settled...
Standing, the king began to move off.
“Sire, wait!”
SSHWOOOPH!
Elias didn’t even bother to look behind himself – he knew what had happened.
As he had been busy getting acquainted to his new seats, the bubble-butted king hadn’t noticed that the blue, Acorn-clad banner was being worked between his thick buttocks by the constant motion.
Therefore, when he stood up, the grip of his ass-crack on the fabric was so strong that it had actually tugged it off of the top of the throne, where it now trailed on the floor like a lewd wedding train.
Once again, Elias sighed.
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