The Sleepover, Part 5
     An hour or so later, Crissy started stirring, waking me up.   
     “Time to get up?” I mumbled
     “Yeah, it's nearly noon.  “Let's get up and get something accomplished before Jason gets home.
     “OK.  What do you wanna do?”  If she didn't have any ideas, I did.
     “Let's get up and throw the sheets from this bed and your bed in the washer.  Then we can take a shower, get dressed, and maybe go eat lunch.”
     “Sounds reasonable to me.  I'll go get my sheets.  Where's the washer?”
     “It's in the pantry area by the kitchen.”
     I picked my shorts up off the floor, again.  Funny how they weren't staying on very well.  My sheets were fairly rumpled, and I was sure they didn't smell great, so I pulled them off, pulled up the blankets, and carried the sheets into the pantry.  Chrissy had her sheets and added them to the washer.  I headed into the bathroom, peed, and took a look in the mirror.  Chrissy walked in, hanging up on a call on her phone.  
     “I need to show you how to start the shower, I guess,”  she said.  She put the phone on the counter and got in the shower.  “The first set of buttons controls the water temperature.  Around 100 is a good place to start, but most people like it a little warmer than that.  The second set of buttons chooses which shower heads to turn on, up to 3.  The third set of buttons controls the actual pressure.  Some people like a gentle rain, and others want it so strong it feels like it will take your skin off.  The last set of buttons actually turns it on and off, so that you can stop it all with one push.  If you're the only one using the shower, you don't have to reset it all every time.  And this last knob turns on the dryer.  Want to set it up for yourself?”
     “OK.”  I went through the settings, and started the shower.  Chrissy stepped out and used the toilet, then came back in.
     The shower was as much fun as it had been the morning before (The Sleepover, Part 4).  And, of course, the view of Chrissy nude was enough to get my heart going.  We did the washing-each-other thing again.  I don't think I'll ever be able to take a shower again without thinking about that!
     After the dry cycle, we went in our respective rooms and got dressed.  I would rather have gone in her room and watched her dress, but she told me it wasn't a specator sport, today.  Fooey.
    I was in the living room when she emerged.  
     “What would you like for a meal?” she asked.  “You probably know as well as I do what's available.”
     “Well, I haven't got a lot of cash.  Someplace inexpensive would be a good idea.”  I hadn't expected to have to buy a serious meal, so I only had 20 bucks or so.
     “Don't worry about it.  You've earned whatever you want.  How about a Texas Road House steak?”  
     I wasn't sure what she meant by “earning it,”  but I was a carnivore.  Meat sounded good.
     “OK.  I'm in for it.”  
     We went up the stairs, out the back door, and got in the red Toyota.  She backed out of the driveway, turned left, and headed to the nearby Texas Road House. 
     “So, how are you enjoying your weekend?” she asked.  Again, with a wink.  “Are you enjoying watching Jason practice baseball, eating pizza, and playing games?”
     “Yes.  And if this is a test, that's my story, and I'm sticking to it!”
     “Good, good.  Just prepping you for the type of questions that might come up some time in the future.”
     She pulled into the Road House parking lot, quickly found a parking spot (since it was pretty early in the afternoon), and put the Toyota in it.  She handled a car as well as any guy I knew.
     In the restaurant, we were quickly seated.  Chrissy had requested a back corner, so we were out of the flow of things.  We sat in the booth, across the table from each other.  I loved the view across the table!
     We ordered what we wanted.  I wanted a good steak, not too large, medium rare.  Chrissy ordered a small sirloin, rare.  We both asked for Diet Cokes.  
     After the Cokes arrived, and while we waited for our food, we did a little talking.  Let me tell you up front, I've never been one who found it easy to talk to the girls, so this was a learning experience for me.
     “Do you have any questions?” Chrissy asked.  
     “Well, yeah, of course.”  It was almost funny.  “What happens next?”
      “Understand,” she explained, “this is not about love.  Usually, girls will give you sex for security and romance.  Guys give girls romance and security for sex.  It's a trade-off, in most cases.  In this instance, I'm giving you sex for my entertainment and your education.  I want you to be a better man.  I want you to understand what women expect, and what they can give you in return.  After this weekend, don't call me.  Don't act any different toward me.  Don't act any different toward Jason.  If I want to see you again, I'll have Jason contact you.  It happens.  The supply of nice guys who are virgins and open-minded and who otherwise meet my requirements isn't immense.”
     “Who else have you 'trained?'” I asked, figuring I wouldn't get an answer.
     “I can't and won't give you names.  But here's a teaser.  After tomorrow, you will probably be able to discern the guys who I have had here.  You won't be able to tell which ones Jason has brought home and who left without even kissing me, but you'll be able to tell which ones at least gave up their virginity.”
     “Do you know if you've been successful with these guys?  I mean, do you keep track of us, or what?”  The idea made me a little uneasy, for some reason.
     “Oh, you know, girls talk.  And I know a lot of the girls in your school.  Yeah, I hear reports, occasionally.  Some girls know what I've been doing.  Most appreciate it, whether they actually know, or not.  Teen sex is not all that easy, and anything that makes life easier for young people is good.”  
     She broke off, because our food arrived.
     Observing her eat made it clear that she had excellent manners.  I tried not to embarrass her or myself.  Yeah, I know good manners, but that doesn't mean I always remember to wipe my mouth before taking a drink, and all that stuff.  
     The meal was really good, and, of course, the company was even better.  It occrred to me that learning how to just talk to a girl you find attractive might be one of the more important lessons of the weekend.
     When we had finished and Chrissy had paid (and I insisted on putting down a generous tip), we went out, got in the car, and headed back to the house.  It was about 3:30, and Jason would be home around 5:30, so we still had a little time.  I hoped Chrissy had some plans, but I really wasn't in a position to push.
     When we got back to the downstairs apartment, it turned out that Chrissy did, indeed, have some plans.  She put an easy-listending station on the radio, and sat on the couch.  
     “Come and sit by me,” she said, patting the couch beside her.  I did as requrested.  “I just want to cuddle a little bit,” she said.
     “Fine by me.”  Well, I might have liked more, but, you know, beggers and all that.
     “I want you to know how to just be a little romantic, Johnny.  I know it doesn't come naturally for you guys, but it's really important to know how to make a girl feel happy and relaxed.  You'll never get there by just groping and pawing.  I showed you some of that last night, but even that was closer to the end game of actual sex.  You have to start out slow.  You have to impress her with your manners.  Open doors for her, including the car door.  Yeah, I know it seems like no one does that any more, but it's still important.
     “And hold her hand.  Put your arm around her when you're walking.”
     “Is there a way to tell if she wants me to do any of that?”
     “If you treat her right on your first date, and she accepts a second date, she will let you hold her hand, etc.  If she kisses you good night after the second date, then you should be ready to proceed.  Always assume that this is the girl that you will spend the rest of your life with.  Treat her like you would like another guy to treat your sister or your mother.”
     And with that, she leaned over and kissed me, gently.  I put my arm around her, and she snuggled in closer.  I kissed the top of her head, right between the two upright ears.  She leaned ever closer, breathing on my neck.  Yes, it tickled.  Yes, I loved it.  Once again, I picked up her legs and put them across mine, so she was literally sitting in my lap.  She cuddled up close, her head under my chin.  I wrapped my arms around her, and just enjoyed the great smell of her hair, her warm breath on my chest, and the occasional twitch of her ear under my chin, enjoying the soft music in the background.
     We  might even have fallen asleep, but the slam of two car doors brought us to wakefulness.  Chrissy slid off my lap, straightened up her clothes, and turned off the radio, and went out in the kitchen.  I heard two voices, one male and one female, coming down the stairs.  The door opened and a girl I vaguely remembered as Sassy, Chrissy's older sister, came in, closely followed by Jason.  (NOTE:  As mentioned in an earlier episode, Sassy's name is actually Sassinak.  Look it up.  Chrissy was two years older than Jason, and Sassy was two years older than Chrissy.)
     “Phew, I'm sweaty,” said Jason.  “I'm going to take a shower.”  He crossed the living room to his bedroom and went in, closing the door behind him. 
     Sassy walked into the kitchen and hugged Chrissy.  A quick, low conversation ensued, with the occasional glance in my direction.  I had to admit I was curious what was going on.
     Chrissy motioned me over to where they were standing.
     “I hope you don't mind, but I told Sassy that you are  real gem.  We have a deal that when i discover a guy like that, I tell her about him.  When she can, she drives down the three hours from the university and I let her take him for a test drive, so to speak.  So later this evening, you will get a chance to learn about another woman.  Are you OK with that?”  
     “How can I complain?  This has been a real fantasy weekend, so far.”  I hated to be so honest, but hey, I came in a virgin, right?  
     “OK, after dinner and after Jason goes to bed, we'll make our arrangements.”  Chrissy winked.  Could I ever get tired of that?
     After Jason came out of his room, newly washed and refreshed, Chrissy and Sassy made pizza.  Pizza twice in one weekend?  Why not?  They each made a large pizza, but that's where the similarity ended.  Sassy made a thin-crust pizza that featured anchovies (figures, cats and fish), tuna (never saw that before), catnip, and cheese.  No, feline hybrids are not affected much by catnip, but it is a minty taste that they like.  Chrissy made a thick-crust pizza that featured hamburger, feta cheese, bleu cheese, and jalapenos.  Again, flavors that were not particularly familiar to me, but the combination was good.  They said they liked to experiment, and only occasinally had to throw away the results!
     We finished off the pizzas, although we were running out of steam toward the end.  Then we watched a little TV.  We watched until Saturday Night Live was on, and it was the usual political drivel, so we turned it off.  Jason had already gone to bed, saying he had practice again early.  (I am SO glad I didn't try out for any of the teams!)
     I headed into my room, and Sassy followed me.  She closed the door (but I noticed she didn't lock it).  Then she walked over and sat on the edge of the bed.
     “OK, boy, take it off.  Take it off.  Take it all off!”  I recognized the old razor advertisement.  Maybe Gillette?   At any rate, she wanted me to stand in front of her and take my clothes off.  You never know nervousness until a person you barely know wants to watch you strip.  What if she didn't approve of boxers, or white socks, or whatever?
     But I did what she told me.  First, I took off my T shirt.  Nothing special.  Pink Floyd “Dark Side of the Moon.”  Got it from my dad.
     Then my shoes.  My socks.  (No words of disapproval or disgust, so far.)  My blue jeans.  Then, the final piece...my underwear.  I stood in front of her, nude.
     “OK, now I'll return the favor.”  She had me sit on the edge of the bed, and she did the same routine.  Again, nothing much out of the ordinary.  I noticed she wore a pink bra and panties.  That was interesting because, whereas Chrissy had just one black ear and a few stray black spots on her fur, Sassy was almost exactly half black.  Her left side was white, with a pink nipple and a pink lip on her vulva, and her right side was almost entirely black, with a black nipple, and a black lip on her vulva.  She was black all the way down to her right foot, although the toes were white.
     One difference between Sassy and Chrissy is that Sassy's breasts were a little larger, and her hips were more rounded that Chrissy's.  Less of an athlete, more of a philosopher, I guess.  I had noticed earlier she was just a little taller than Chrissy, maybe 5 feet 4 inches.
     When she had kicked off her panties, she came over to me and kissed my forehead.  Then she sat down next to me.
     “I know this is a little awkward, but keep in mind I'm just here for the sex.  I'm not here to take you away from a girlfriend, or steal your heart away.  I'd just like to have a little sexual release.  Are you OK with that?”
     “Oh, yes, that was my understanding.  I'm not sure what Chrissy told you, but all I want to do is learn about sex and have some fun.”  
     “Well, I know Chrissy tries to teach you guys about foreplay, etc.  I'm not averse to a little groping and giggling, but I do eventually want to get to the orgasm.  Several times, if possible.  Now, I could do that with one of my toys, but I want to help you get some enjoyment, too.  Ready?”
     “Yes, ma'am.”   
     She gave me a funny look, then pushed me backwards on the bed.  
     “Get your head on the pillow, and your feet down by the foot of the bed.”
     I did it.  She got on the bed on her knees, then put her right leg over me, straddling my body.  She backed up until her vulva was just in front of my muzzle.
     “Do you know what to do to that thing, with your tongue?”
     “Yes, I believe I do.” I stuck my nose briefly in her vagina.  She gasped.  (Cold doggy nose, remember?)  Then I began to run my tongue up and down her slit, being sure to give plenty of attention to the nub that I now knew to be her clitoris.  After I had made a few laps (so to speak), I felt a warm and slippery sensation on my penis.  I realized that I was experiencing the famous “69” position, and Hermy was in her mouth.  
     I found that I could just reach her breasts, so I put a little attention in on them, as well as running my hands over all the body I could touch.  I could touch her butt, too.  I was enjoying myself, and I guess she was, too, because I began to feel that familiar pulsing in her vagina.  I stuck my tongue in there, and it was definitely getting active.  Also, I noticed that there was a lot of that “liquid velvet” gathering on her labia.   
     “How are you doing down there?” I asked.
     “Mmmmmm-mmmm,” was all the answer I got.  
     After a few more minutes, I could tell we were both getting close to an orgasm.  I heard her gasping, and her attentions to Hermy seemed to be more and more intense.   I heard a long moan, and then her vagina started pulsing rapidly.  Bingo!
     “Look out, I'm about to do it!” I said to her.  She kept sucking, and I felt the familiar electric ring climb my penis, until it reached the tip and I knew I was ejaculating.  Sassy kept right on sucking.  Well, at least she couldn't say I didn't give her a warning.  I've heard that's a real faux pas.
     We subsided into pants and gasps, relaxing from the initial thrill.  Eventually, Sassy rolled off me, turned around, and lay next to me, resting her head on my chest.  I thought she might be going to sleep.  
     “That was an excellent first go,” she said.  “Ready to start over?”
     “Sure.  How do you want to do it?”
     “Let's try the classic missionary position.  But not immediately.  Pay some attention to my body.”  
      I wasn't sure what she wanted, but I was more than willing to pay some attention to that gorgeous body.  She rolled over on her back, next to me, and I began running my hands over her skin.  Her fur was about as soft as Chrissy's, but she had a little more “padding” under it.  It gave her skin a very supple feel, like gliding your hand over a wave at the lake, maybe.  Hard to describe.  I did as Chrissy taught me, and felt all over her body.  I kissed her all over her body, too.  She especially liked being kissed under her chin.   And under her breasts, too.  
     And eventually, of course, I kissed her belly button.  She reached down and took my hand, and put it on her breast.  I took this to mean she wanted more intimate attention.  First I thoroughly studied her breasts with my hand, and then with my mouth.  I found the black nipple tasted exactly like the white one.  
     Next, I sneaked a quick feel of her vulva.  It was getting slippery again, and she was starting to breath a little faster.  I played around down there for a minute or two.  Then, she pulled me on top of her as she spread her legs.
     She helped guide Hermy into her vagina.  Then she wrapped her legs around me, pulling me as close as possible.  I started thrusting into her more vigorously.
     “Here,” she said, holding up her hands to me.  “Take my wrists and hold my hands above my head.  It's a little fantasy thing, and I've never seen any girl who doesn't like it now and then.”
     So I took her wrists and held them over her head.  I was afraid of hurting her, so I did it as gently as possible, but she did seem to like it.  She closed her eyes, and from what I've heard, she was probably fantasizing some hairy-chested Duke taking his unwilling Duchess, with lots of “heaving bosoms” and “throbbing manhood” thrown in by some romance writer.  Hey, Chrissy told me women were more complicated than men.
     It wasn't too long before, once again, I could feel an orgasm approaching.  I told Sassy, and she just nodded.  Her movements got jerkier, and more frantic, until I again felt the telltale throbbing in her vagina, which set me off again.  After the first several spurts, the force of my thrusts slowly waned.  I released her wrists and collapsed on my left side, next to her.  She rolled on her left side, and we spooned together for a few minutes.
     “You are certainly a real find, as Chrissy told me,” she murmured.  “It's been a while since I've had two orgasms that close together.”
     “So I'm doing something right, I guess,” I replied, quietly.
     She moved my hand to her breast, again.  I assumed she wanted some more attention, and I gladly gave it.  I don't think I could ever refuse the offer of a soft breast with an erect nipple.  
     In just a few minutes, Sassy was showing interest in more attention.  I checked her vulva, and sure enough, it was getting slippery again.
     “I want you to use that position Chrissy showed you.  You know, the pretzel one.”  
     I had a suspicion I knew why.  And why not?  
     “OK, pull your right leg up,” I instructed.  
     She did so.  I got on my knees and straddled her left leg.  I slid up until my now-erect penis slid inter her vagina.  I began thrusting gently; for this to work right, it took longer than our previous efforts.   
     As I was working, I kneaded Sassy's breasts and otherwise stroked her body and stimulated her parts.  They say you never know what little erogenous zone will do the magic trick for a woman, so try them all.
     After about 15 minutes of gentle thrusting, I began to feel the swelling of the small, vestigial canine bulb.  It made it feel like Sassy's vagina was getting tighter.  Because of our “twisted” (hence “the pretzel”) position, the bulb was hitting her clitoris on each thrust.  It didn't take long after that for Sassy to again begin the gasping and moaning that indicated another orgasm, and I quickly joined her in the ecstasy.
     After so much exercise, we were both worn out.  I lay back down behind Sassy, spooning her again, one of her breasts in my hand.  Soon, we were dead to the world.  But not so dead that I didn't feel it when Chrissy came and got in the bed, too, spooning me from behind.  What a stack of happy spoons! 
************
	When I woke up, I was alone in the bed, again.  I always thought I was a light sleeper, but these ladies had repeatedly gotten out of bed without waking me.  I stretched and checked my morning wood.  Yep, still there.  Using it hadn't worn it out, or anything.  I lay there for a few minutes, letting the swelling go down (by not thinking about Chrissy or Sassy, mainly).  When I could get up without sporting a kickstand, I did so.  The bathroom was vacant, so performed my morning necessaries, put my shorts on, and walked out into the dining area.  As usualy, Jason was nowhere in sight.
    But Chrissy and Sassy were there.  Both in aprons, and both starkers under them.  Man, that was a sight I could get used to.  They both turned to me, winked in unison (so it must be a family habit), smiled sunny smiles, and went back to their breakfast preparation.  Chrissy was handling the bacon and sausage, and Sassy was in charge of the pancakes.  These ladies would spoil me in every way, if I was around here all the time.  But, of course, that wasn't going to happen.  
     “Can I help you ladies?  Need the table set?”  My mother taught me not to be a lump when I was visiting.
     “That would be great!” beamed Chrissy.  “The plates are next to the refrigerator, and the silverware's in the drawer beside the sink.”
     I got the tableware out and put it in place.  By the time I was done with that, the ladies were dishing out the breakfast.  They turned off the stove, put the pans in safe positions, and sat down at the table.  I let them seat themselves first, since I figured they had spots they preferred.  It was a fairly small square table, so it's not like it was complicated or anything.  I sat, and we began eating.
     “Is Jason already gone to baseball practice again?” I asked.  If it took this much work to be on the team, I was glad I wasn't a sports player.  
     “Oh, yeah,” Chrissy explained.  “And most weekends, we'd both have things going on for at least some of the time.  This is just a slack weekend, early in the school year.”
     Sassy had the same good eating manners as Chrissy, which shouldn't have surprised me.  Her slightly larger breasts did swing a little more, giving me wonderful peeks at her nipples, which I enjoyed.  (And I had to keep reminding myself that I had had all four of the female nipples in that room in my mouth in the last 24 hours.)
     “So, Sassy, was he what I told you he was?”  Chrissy pulled the wink on Sassy, and I probably blushed more than a little.
     “Oh, yes, every bit.  He introduced me to some sensations I've never had before.  And that vestigial knot really hits the spot, just as you promised!”  Now I WAS blushing!
     “Uh, I take it I'm the first boy you've invited here who had that?”  It was a surprise to me, too, after all.
     “Yes, so far as we know.  And it has been almost exclusively canine hybrids that we've invited, so it's kind of a surprise to us.  We've heard about it, but never seen or experienced it.  But from what you say, apparently it never appeared to you, either.  We suspect it only shows itself after quite a long period of sexual activity at one time.”
     Yeah, that probably explained it.  When it was just me and my hand and my fantasies, quicker was better.
     “Well, now that we've had breakfast, shall we get showered?”  
     We put the breakfast dishes in the sink, then the girls had me sit in one of the chairs.  I had no idea what was coming, so I just did what they asked.  Sassy straddled my lap, facing me, took off her apron, and hugged me tightly.  Chrissy bent over next to my head, took my left ear in her and, AND BIT IT!!!!!   The pain brought tears to my eyes, and I was whimpering like a 3-year-old puppy!  I knew not to jerk my head, because that could cause my ear to tear.
     Chrissy straightened back up and released my ear from her mouth.  I saw a trickle of blood on her lips.  Then, she held out her left hand.  There were two gold rings in her open palm.  She took my ear in her right hand and made a couple of quick movements.  She released my ear, and I heard the tinkle of metal when I flipped it.  
     “OK, what was THAT all about?” I demanded.  Each girl took one of my hands and led me into the bathroom.  They turned on the light and placed me in front of the mirror.  I saw the two gold rings, about a half inch apart, and about halfway up the height of my ear.  I flipped my ear, and I saw the two rings hit each other, making a tinkling.
     “I gave you a tease yesterday morning that you would be able to tell which of the guys I have had in here.  I'm sure you've noticed several of your classmates wearing an earring in their left ear,” Chrissy explained.
     “Most of the guys you see will have a single gold earring.  That means I liked what he did, how he behaved, how he performed, etc.  You may see some guys with a silver earring.  That means they did OK, but not outstanding.  Maybe they just need some practice.  Maybe they were a little too shy.  Whatever.  There are a couple of guys with a brass earring.  They had some sort of problem and didn't do everything we asked of them.  Yeah, some people have their hangups.  There's even another guy who has one gold and one silver earring.  I though he did great, but when Sassy tried him, he wasn't so great.  Maybe he just doesn't like 'older women.'”
     Oh, that smile!
     “But you, Johnny, were completely outstanding.  You did everything we asked, never tried to insist on getting your own way, you put your mouth where we asked you to, and treated us like queens.  We're sorry about hurting you, but let me assure you, those who are savvy will be impressed.”
     That gave me a warm glow.  Or maybe it was just the blood running down my cheek.
     “So lets get you thoroughly cleaned up.  We have some good antiseptic soap, and you didn't see it, but I washed my mouth out before I bit you.”  Chrissy walked over and turned on the showers.  And now I knew why there were three shower heads!
     Showering by yourself is OK, depending on what you're in there for.  Showering with a friend is a lot better, for reasons most people understand.  And showering with two friends who also happen to be very sexy ladies is a joy every boy should experience once.
     I had experience washing and being washed by Chrissy.  It was a lot of the same, but a lot more of it, to wash and be washed by both Chrissy and Sassy.  Washing backs is fun.  Washing fronts is even more fun.  Washing butts is nice.  Washing vulvas, especially two at one time, just can't be beat.  And what was even more fun is that each one of the ladies wanted another quick soap-lubricated screwing.
     But, of course, it all had to come to an end.  We ran the dryer, got out, got dressed, and said our goodbyes.  Sassy had to head back to the university, Chrissy had to drop me back at home, and I had to get busy and do the homework I had not worked on at all over the weekend.  Of course, I found myself drifting off into daydreams of the sexy kind.  Especially since Chrissy had said, as I got out of the car, “Don't be surprised if I have Jason invite you over again.”
**************
     “And that, Johnny, is how I met and fell in love with your mother.  I hope this has been more instructive than 'the talk' most fathers give their sons when they reach your age.”  In fact, he was listening in rapt attention.
     Finally, he snapped out of his somewhat shell-shocked spell and looked at me.
     “OK, that was really ...  great, although some of it comes really close to TMI.  But I do have a question.”
     “Go ahead.”
    “OK, you and I and your parents, my grandma and grandpa, are canine hybrids.”
     “Yes, that's obvious enough.”
     “And mom and Pyanfar are feline hybrids.”  (NOTE:  I let Chrissy's parents name the first girl baby.  They were still Anne McCaffrey fans.  I'll let you Google the name.  My folks and I got to name any boys.) 
     “Yes, go on.”
     “I thought canine and feline hybrids couldn't ... uh ....”
     “Interbreed?  That's correct.”
     “So, uh, where did Py and I come from?”  He looked genuinely puzzled.
     “Well, it wasn't for lack of trying.  Your mother is a...well, a lusty woman, and she has insisted on regular breeding attempts, if you catch my drift.  Still does today...”
     “Ew, gross, dad.  Really TMI.”
     “Well, anyway, after much unselfish effort expended in trying to prove all the scientists and biologists wrong, we admitted defeat and looked to other avenues for building our family.”
     “So where did we come from, Dad?”
     “Well, eventually we realized there were plenty of orphaned and abandoned kittens and puppies at the animal shelter, so we just went down there and picked up you and your sister.  Much cheaper than a hospital maternity bill, too.”
     The look on his face was priceless.  He screamed, “NO!!!!” and ran to the bedroom door, flinging it open in anger and confusion.
     “MOM!!!” he yelled out the door.  “Mom, Dad says he got us at the animal shelter!”
     Chrissy hurried up the stairs, then stepped into the room, calmly, a somewhat annoyed but not angry look on her face.  
     “Are you trotting out that old animal shelter story again, just for a cheap laugh?”
     I sheepishly admitted I was.  It's not like she hadn't heard me tell it at parties and family gatherings, before.
     “Well, tell him the truth.  Tell him that we adopted him from a fine adoption service and that it cost many thousands of dollars and almost two years of jumping through their hoops to qualify, and that we love him dearly.”
     “I think you just did, dear.  Now, leave him here, close the door, and you can go back to your dinner preparations.  Let me finish up.”
     She gently pushed Jonny back into his bedroom.  He reluctantly sat on the bed next to me.  She gave me “the wink” and closed the door.
     “So...was the rest of that story true?  It all seems pretty fantastic, to me.”
     “Every word is, to the best of my recollections.  It WAS nearly 20 years ago, now.”
     “So I should believe it, and I should learn about girls from it?”  He looked a little skeptical.
     “You should.  And treating them well carries its own rewards, both short and long term.”
     “What sort of rewards?”
     “Well, I've got your mother.  And she has made me very happy.”
     “I guess that good.  And what else?”
     “Before I married her, I had a number of fantastic girl friends, and some equally fantastic sex.”
     “That sounds good.  But that came from mom's teaching, didn't it?”
     “Yes.  On the other hand, you have your cousins, your Aunt Sassy's girls, and if they haven't taught you anything yet, I suspect they soon will.”
     He blushed a little.  “I wondered why they kept trying to get me all alone.  Maybe I shouldn't hide from them.”
     “That's up to you.  I suspect anything they teach you will be with your aunt's approval, and possibly her coaching and instruction, if I know her.”
     “Do you have anything else to show for what you claim Mom put you through?”  He still looked a little skeptical.
     I laughed, and flipped my left ear.  The two gold rings there jingled together.