{
  "submission_id": "3364743",
  "keywords": [
    {
      "keyword_id": "9419",
      "keyword_name": "anal penetration",
      "contributed": "f",
      "submissions_count": "33821"
    },
    {
      "keyword_id": "123",
      "keyword_name": "female",
      "contributed": "f",
      "submissions_count": "1103226"
    },
    {
      "keyword_id": "1588",
      "keyword_name": "fingering",
      "contributed": "f",
      "submissions_count": "15819"
    },
    {
      "keyword_id": "136186",
      "keyword_name": "finger in mouth",
      "contributed": "f",
      "submissions_count": "538"
    },
    {
      "keyword_id": "1964",
      "keyword_name": "flowers",
      "contributed": "f",
      "submissions_count": "4406"
    },
    {
      "keyword_id": "1440",
      "keyword_name": "human",
      "contributed": "f",
      "submissions_count": "109912"
    },
    {
      "keyword_id": "165",
      "keyword_name": "male",
      "contributed": "f",
      "submissions_count": "1213372"
    },
    {
      "keyword_id": "5317",
      "keyword_name": "molestation",
      "contributed": "f",
      "submissions_count": "2005"
    },
    {
      "keyword_id": "3932",
      "keyword_name": "non consensual",
      "contributed": "f",
      "submissions_count": "2195"
    },
    {
      "keyword_id": "464",
      "keyword_name": "pokemon",
      "contributed": "f",
      "submissions_count": "196600"
    },
    {
      "keyword_id": "71813",
      "keyword_name": "pokemon battle",
      "contributed": "f",
      "submissions_count": "104"
    },
    {
      "keyword_id": "29631",
      "keyword_name": "pokephilia",
      "contributed": "f",
      "submissions_count": "3690"
    },
    {
      "keyword_id": "112",
      "keyword_name": "rape",
      "contributed": "f",
      "submissions_count": "32265"
    },
    {
      "keyword_id": "909",
      "keyword_name": "romance",
      "contributed": "f",
      "submissions_count": "9212"
    },
    {
      "keyword_id": "129768",
      "keyword_name": "sylveon",
      "contributed": "f",
      "submissions_count": "6238"
    },
    {
      "keyword_id": "7667",
      "keyword_name": "vaporeon",
      "contributed": "f",
      "submissions_count": "5189"
    }
  ],
  "hidden": "f",
  "scraps": "f",
  "favorite": "f",
  "favorites_count": "5",
  "create_datetime": "2024-07-04 23:19:16.056576+00",
  "create_datetime_usertime": "05 Jul 2024 01:19 CEST",
  "last_file_update_datetime": "2024-07-04 23:06:36.612273+00",
  "last_file_update_datetime_usertime": "05 Jul 2024 01:06 CEST",
  "username": "JaspersEevee",
  "user_id": "261033",
  "user_icon_file_name": "374678_JaspersEevee_jasperseevee2wee.png",
  "user_icon_url_large": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/usericons/large/374/374678_JaspersEevee_jasperseevee2wee.png",
  "user_icon_url_medium": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/usericons/medium/374/374678_JaspersEevee_jasperseevee2wee.png",
  "user_icon_url_small": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/usericons/small/374/374678_JaspersEevee_jasperseevee2wee.png",
  "file_name": "5107907_JaspersEevee_forbidden_waters_icon.png",
  "file_url_full": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/files/full/5107/5107907_JaspersEevee_forbidden_waters_icon.png",
  "file_url_screen": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/files/screen/5107/5107907_JaspersEevee_forbidden_waters_icon.png",
  "file_url_preview": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/files/preview/5107/5107907_JaspersEevee_forbidden_waters_icon.jpg",
  "thumbnail_url_huge": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/thumbnails/huge/5107/5107907_JaspersEevee_forbidden_waters_icon.jpg",
  "thumbnail_url_large": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/thumbnails/large/5107/5107907_JaspersEevee_forbidden_waters_icon.jpg",
  "thumbnail_url_medium": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/thumbnails/medium/5107/5107907_JaspersEevee_forbidden_waters_icon.jpg",
  "thumb_huge_x": "300",
  "thumb_huge_y": "296",
  "thumb_large_x": "200",
  "thumb_large_y": "197",
  "thumb_medium_x": "120",
  "thumb_medium_y": "118",
  "thumbnail_url_huge_noncustom": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/files/preview/5107/5107907_JaspersEevee_forbidden_waters_icon.jpg",
  "thumbnail_url_large_noncustom": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/thumbnails/large/5107/5107907_JaspersEevee_forbidden_waters_icon_noncustom.jpg",
  "thumbnail_url_medium_noncustom": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/thumbnails/medium/5107/5107907_JaspersEevee_forbidden_waters_icon_noncustom.jpg",
  "thumb_medium_noncustom_x": "120",
  "thumb_medium_noncustom_y": "118",
  "thumb_large_noncustom_x": "200",
  "thumb_large_noncustom_y": "197",
  "thumb_huge_noncustom_x": "300",
  "thumb_huge_noncustom_y": "296",
  "files": [
    {
      "file_id": "5107907",
      "file_name": "5107907_JaspersEevee_forbidden_waters_icon.png",
      "file_url_full": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/files/full/5107/5107907_JaspersEevee_forbidden_waters_icon.png",
      "file_url_screen": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/files/screen/5107/5107907_JaspersEevee_forbidden_waters_icon.png",
      "file_url_preview": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/files/preview/5107/5107907_JaspersEevee_forbidden_waters_icon.jpg",
      "mimetype": "image/png",
      "submission_id": "3364743",
      "user_id": "261033",
      "submission_file_order": "0",
      "full_size_x": "1876",
      "full_size_y": "1852",
      "screen_size_x": "920",
      "screen_size_y": "908",
      "preview_size_x": "300",
      "preview_size_y": "296",
      "initial_file_md5": "d85dd85421a4db1222a842137c8d01f0",
      "full_file_md5": "647493b2b5dca3498769b447cb2dbe97",
      "large_file_md5": "9bad5965970cf3a31b021935fbd8880d",
      "small_file_md5": "126d5c0617a95717468ed8139c1e70f0",
      "thumbnail_md5": "3e772c95823878fa4acb378abd07d4c2",
      "deleted": "f",
      "create_datetime": "2024-07-04 23:06:36.612273+00",
      "create_datetime_usertime": "05 Jul 2024 01:06 CEST",
      "thumbnail_url_huge": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/thumbnails/huge/5107/5107907_JaspersEevee_forbidden_waters_icon.jpg",
      "thumbnail_url_large": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/thumbnails/large/5107/5107907_JaspersEevee_forbidden_waters_icon.jpg",
      "thumbnail_url_medium": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/thumbnails/medium/5107/5107907_JaspersEevee_forbidden_waters_icon.jpg",
      "thumb_huge_x": "300",
      "thumb_huge_y": "296",
      "thumb_large_x": "200",
      "thumb_large_y": "197",
      "thumb_medium_x": "120",
      "thumb_medium_y": "118",
      "thumbnail_url_huge_noncustom": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/files/preview/5107/5107907_JaspersEevee_forbidden_waters_icon.jpg",
      "thumbnail_url_large_noncustom": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/thumbnails/large/5107/5107907_JaspersEevee_forbidden_waters_icon_noncustom.jpg",
      "thumbnail_url_medium_noncustom": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/thumbnails/medium/5107/5107907_JaspersEevee_forbidden_waters_icon_noncustom.jpg",
      "thumb_medium_noncustom_x": "120",
      "thumb_medium_noncustom_y": "118",
      "thumb_large_noncustom_x": "200",
      "thumb_large_noncustom_y": "197",
      "thumb_huge_noncustom_x": "300",
      "thumb_huge_noncustom_y": "296"
    }
  ],
  "pools": [
    {
      "pool_id": "87439",
      "name": "Forbidden Waters",
      "description": "Tale of a man who falls in love with his neighbor's pet fish in a world where that is frowned upon in polite society. Bad things happen; good things too, but lots of bad things go down, man.",
      "count": "36",
      "submission_left_submission_id": "3343123",
      "submission_left_file_name": "5068880_JaspersEevee_forbidden_waters_icon.png",
      "submission_left_thumbnail_url_huge": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/thumbnails/huge/5068/5068880_JaspersEevee_forbidden_waters_icon.jpg",
      "submission_left_thumbnail_url_large": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/thumbnails/large/5068/5068880_JaspersEevee_forbidden_waters_icon.jpg",
      "submission_left_thumbnail_url_medium": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/thumbnails/medium/5068/5068880_JaspersEevee_forbidden_waters_icon.jpg",
      "submission_left_thumb_huge_x": "300",
      "submission_left_thumb_huge_y": "296",
      "submission_left_thumb_large_x": "200",
      "submission_left_thumb_large_y": "197",
      "submission_left_thumb_medium_x": "120",
      "submission_left_thumb_medium_y": "118",
      "submission_left_thumbnail_url_huge_noncustom": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/files/preview/5068/5068880_JaspersEevee_forbidden_waters_icon.jpg",
      "submission_left_thumbnail_url_large_noncustom": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/thumbnails/large/5068/5068880_JaspersEevee_forbidden_waters_icon_noncustom.jpg",
      "submission_left_thumbnail_url_medium_noncustom": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/thumbnails/medium/5068/5068880_JaspersEevee_forbidden_waters_icon_noncustom.jpg",
      "submission_left_thumb_medium_noncustom_x": "120",
      "submission_left_thumb_medium_noncustom_y": "118",
      "submission_left_thumb_large_noncustom_x": "200",
      "submission_left_thumb_large_noncustom_y": "197",
      "submission_left_thumb_huge_noncustom_x": "300",
      "submission_left_thumb_huge_noncustom_y": "296",
      "submission_right_submission_id": "3372353",
      "submission_right_file_name": "5121109_JaspersEevee_forbidden_waters_icon.png",
      "submission_right_thumbnail_url_huge": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/thumbnails/huge/5121/5121109_JaspersEevee_forbidden_waters_icon.jpg",
      "submission_right_thumbnail_url_large": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/thumbnails/large/5121/5121109_JaspersEevee_forbidden_waters_icon.jpg",
      "submission_right_thumbnail_url_medium": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/thumbnails/medium/5121/5121109_JaspersEevee_forbidden_waters_icon.jpg",
      "submission_right_thumb_huge_x": "300",
      "submission_right_thumb_huge_y": "296",
      "submission_right_thumb_large_x": "200",
      "submission_right_thumb_large_y": "197",
      "submission_right_thumb_medium_x": "120",
      "submission_right_thumb_medium_y": "118",
      "submission_right_thumbnail_url_huge_noncustom": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/files/preview/5121/5121109_JaspersEevee_forbidden_waters_icon.jpg",
      "submission_right_thumbnail_url_large_noncustom": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/thumbnails/large/5121/5121109_JaspersEevee_forbidden_waters_icon_noncustom.jpg",
      "submission_right_thumbnail_url_medium_noncustom": "https://nl1.ib.metapix.net/thumbnails/medium/5121/5121109_JaspersEevee_forbidden_waters_icon_noncustom.jpg",
      "submission_right_thumb_medium_noncustom_x": "120",
      "submission_right_thumb_medium_noncustom_y": "118",
      "submission_right_thumb_large_noncustom_x": "200",
      "submission_right_thumb_large_noncustom_y": "197",
      "submission_right_thumb_huge_noncustom_x": "300",
      "submission_right_thumb_huge_noncustom_y": "296"
    }
  ],
  "description": "Emil is a quiet man with a well kept secret; he has little to look forward to but even less to complain about as he works his life away and puts up with his obnoxious wealthy neighbor.\n\nThat is until a once-in-a-lifetime sequence of events threatens to upend everything he has, should he go for the catch. ",
  "description_bbcode_parsed": "<span style='word-wrap: break-word;'>Emil is a quiet man with a well kept secret; he has little to look forward to but even less to complain about as he works his life away and puts up with his obnoxious wealthy neighbor.<br /><br />That is until a once-in-a-lifetime sequence of events threatens to upend everything he has, should he go for the catch. </span>",
  "writing": "[center]Forbidden Waters – 16[/center]\n\n\n\n\nThere’s an old Kalosian poem, aged as Arceus’ timeworn hooves, recited time and again to the deafened ears of stupor stricken lovers young and old; it goes like this…\n\n\n\n\n[center]Petit à petit, l’mon fait son nid.\n\n(Little by little, the ‘mon makes its nest.)\n\nC'est queue est tournée vers la Douleur Exquise qui vient.\n\n(Its tail turned towards the Exquisite Pain that comes.)\n\nEn espérant la chaleur d'un amant dans une autre maison.\n\n(Hoping for the warmth of a lover in another home.)[/center]\n\n\n\n\nSpinel danced along Lumiose’s ochre dawnlit streets, hopping across the cobbles like stones in a stream, sailing on the freshly made memories of his best night out in years. It didn’t seem like it was going to be at first, though. Actually, it kinda seemed like it was gonna end as a disaster too! \n\nThe Stone Team had seemed to enjoy Spinel’s company enough that they kept dragging him around to lavish meals and swanky social functions, but in the haze of admiration he completely forgot his place in the world. As he followed them into the Stone Crown someone had complained to arena management that an unsupervised Pokemon was taking up a prime-time seat, so just as the first match was about to begin a group of staff members had arrived with menacing, metal spiked ‘moncatcher poles, ready to show his pink tuchus the dumpsters.\n\n“Oh, he’s not bugging me,” Richard had said aloud, brushing aside the stiff-necked ushers. When the manager insisted, reaching for Spinel's throat with bared steel jaws, Richard smacked it aside and got up. “He can have my seat, then, asshole.”\n\nThreatened with the humiliation of having to drag one of the guests of the palace out onto the street, they melted away like ice left to face the rays of the midday sun.\n\nHis savior smirked with satisfaction and plopped him right onto his lap. Spinel was so stunned by the public gesture of support that all he could do was blush and curl his ribbons around himself like a gift wrapped apple as everyone gawked in amazement.”{You shouldn’t do that for me…}” he squeaked, crushed beneath the disapproving gaze of the crowd.\n\nRichard’s light erased the shade of the offended onlookers in an instant as he noticed Spinel shriveling up like a dried plum, and jostled his shoulders. “Haha, don’t worry about it, lil guy. Show me all the best places in town and we’re even, kay?”\n\nSo, against his better judgment, he did just that.\n\nHe showed them the Centrico Plaza, made sure they got to see its glamorous gold and marble statues surrounded by the perfectly manicured ‘mon-shaped topiaries, but stopped them from going anywhere near the shops. No no, those places were salivating tourist traps, bred to shake coin purses empty for overpriced, middling luxuries. \n\nHe dipped into his own funds and quietly greased the palms of a few palace guides tasked with ensuring Prince Meyer’s guests didn’t leave the land of milk and honey, slipping them right past and into his home turf; South Boulevard Village. He snagged them a killer lunch of Crawdaunt chowder and baguettes for mates rates. Rather than suffering the pompous Pikouture Sucrée, he knocked on the door of kind old Mrs. Suker, convincing her to open her little shop of homemade rustic delights on her day off. Forget that mass produced tat sold along the golden loop, Spinel dragged them through a garden of market stalls, swap meets, and flea markets along the outer walls, harvesting up baskets of commemorative bounty for his esteemed guests. Instead of sipping down thousands of Pokedollars from criminally priced glasses at La Coupe Saphir, he took them on a tour of all the tastiest independent breweries and cheesemongers, personally vouching for them to join the festivities of the locally revered daytaler haunt in the basement of Mains Vides that evening. \n\nDrunk with wonderful company, blinded by Richard’s glow, Spinel missed the gang of sour-faced pimp-hands following them into the bar. \n\nRichard was utterly entrancing to him, a silver tongued enigma. The man could sing in any unpracticed broken key he damn well pleased and the world would have danced to his tune. When he smiled and clapped people on the shoulders they locked step with him so tight he could have walked them off bridges. Anyhuman else he’d seen commanding the same gregarious powers dragged a long dark shadow of sociopathy behind them, ready to split anyone’s throat at a moment's notice. At any point in his life Richard could have summoned up a swarm of opportunistic parasites ready to live off his scraps, but instead he seemed content to stay wrapped up in a warm cloud of prosocial merriment. He couldn’t help but gaze from afar, smiling like a Quagsire, as the guy led the entire tavern in a raucous, intoxicated line dance in a language he didn’t even understand.\n\nDistortion damn this beautiful city, she cursed me with love again.\n\n A man with a mop of greasy black hair obscuring a face covered in scars grinned down at him. “Guess what they say is true, ain’t it boys?” Spinel shook awake as the surly voice croaked from a seat to his right.\n\nAn old bar stool was kicked along the cement floor over to his left, creaking as a flabby, overweight man with a roughly shaven head sat down carrying a heavy equipment case with him. “Wait long enough and any uppity whore eventually comes crawling back home.”\n\nSpinel’s spine chilled stiff as the jagged, rock hard fingers of a third gangster cinced him down to his stool. “Got a lotta clients be real happy know’n yer mouth is open for business again.”\n\nSpinel started trying to shove himself free, drawing up his energies for a hypervoice, but squeaked in shock as the two men on either side of him tied his ribbons up into painful knots and he felt the prick of something being jammed up into his belly. The one standing behind him slowly, quietly, dragged Spinel and the stool he was sitting on behind the bar to a dark wine cellar. Out of sight, out of mind.\n\nWhat was wrong with him? He was a Pokemon, dammit! He was stronger than any of these bozo’s combined, a single round of rough play woulda left them all begging for casts in the charity hospice. But his body felt weak, his claws refused to unfurl, his tendrils were bundled up uselessly like damp ships ropes. He struggled to keep the lids of his beautiful sapphire eyes fluttering open as his head was pressed into a wooden rack, wedged between two twenty-year-old Persim Berry wine bottles.\n\n“{Hhh… hee… heeeel- Ooof}” Spinel called out weakly, hoping anyone would hear his plea, but a muscular elbow knocked the wind from his sails, leaving his mouth agape as he tried desperately to fill his lungs with air again.\n\nAn unwashed finger, knobbled from years of broken knuckles healing over, jammed between Spinel’s sharp, feline teeth and pried his jaw open, inspecting him like a working Mudsdale. “Yeah, still perfect. Guess all that running yer mouth has kept it in shape.” Then he reached down to his underside and started working the same filthy finger, wet with Spinel’s own spittle, up into the Sylveon’s ass. \n\nSpinel’s hackles raised and his tail bottlebrushed as he growled, helplessly bucking and kicking at the man’s belly. He wanted nothing less than to spill his fat guts onto the floor like a barrel of spoiled cognac.\n\n“Ass is nice and tight again. Might take a spin myself, when we get back,” he croaked from a parched throat, then smacked Spinel across the temple for the crime of biting his thumb. “Shut the damn door, man. Can’t go disturbing the natives.”\n\nSpinel’s legs went limp, out of energy to put up a fight under whatever drug they’d injected him with. \n\n“I’ll get the registration scrubber. Hold still, slut.”\n\nTears welled up in his eyes, dripping onto the floor in fat plops. He prepared himself for the agony of the scrubber, like being tattooed throughout your entire body for minutes on end of what felt like endless torture, and then getting claimed by the inevitable bootleg Love Ball that would become his new prison. He’d worked so hard to escape this hell, but threw away everything Valorie, Captain Clemens, and everyone else had done for him to get out. And for what? Some human guy who shouldn’t, wouldn’t, couldn’t ever want him the same way Spinel did? Damn his stupid, hopeful, amorous heart! \n\n“Let’s go, buddy,” he imagined hearing Richard’s voice faintly behind the buzzing in his ears.\n\nThe bald man held up a bulky lunchbox shaped device with a huge lens on the front that projected a fan of blue lasers. It prickled his skin as they danced across his paws and then he winced as they moved up to his wrists and cranked it up to full power.. “Welcome home, Cherry.”\n\nIt was ok, he told himself. He’d find another way out. He couldn’t ask Val to stick her neck out for him again, it was his own stupid fault he got back into this mess. He’d convince someone to crush his Pokeball, run far enough fast enough so the commands couldn’t be felt, find some way to poison and kill everyone in the brothel. Something. Anything.\n\n“Hey, Sylveon!” he heard again, a figment of his addled mind.\n\nOne of them started digging through his little saddle bags, raining his few precious possessions onto the floor like refuse found at the bottom of a thrift-store purse. “Little slut’s been busy. Nice chunk ‘o dough in here,” one of the men said as they pocketed his coin pouches.\n\nEven the drugs couldn’t stop him from shrieking as the energies in his body were shunted around at random, smudged around like a child would with finger paints, but he was eventually choked into silence with a hand around his neck as the scanner ran up his legs. It was like that every single time, like a Slugma eating you alive but you’re only able to gaze at your own body in horror as you were melted from the toes up. \n\nA crashing noise. His vision started to glisten with red and purple stars from the pain.\n\nIt was ok, he thought. The instruments and singing outside the cellar soothed him a little as it wound down to a close. At least he got to feel wanted by a man he desired, even if it wasn’t real in the end. \n\n“What the FUCK are you doing to my friend?!”\n\nOk, that definitely wasn’t a mirage , he thought just before the cellar filled to the ceiling with rushing water and then projectile vomited everyone and everything back out into the bar. Spinel came to a stop in the middle of the dance floor, slumped onto his side in ankle-deep water like a Magikarp choking for air in a dried up creek as chaos erupted around him. He scrambled underneath an aging wooden table while Richard dislocated one of his captor’s jaws with a full-powered left hook. He managed to have the presence of mind to trip the other two for Richard with his bound up ribbons, then quickly succumbed to his exhaustion.\n\nThere’s a couple things you don’t ever wanna do in any city’s workers’ quarter: you don’t mess with a man’s money, you don’t mess with his friends and family, and you don’t interrupt him when he’s on a bender. Almost all the patrons, all at once, had their drinks dashed across the floor and mixed into a semi-alcoholic quagmire. Pretty soon after that Emilio, Richard, Vaporeon, Machoke, and Incineroar joined into an all out brawl with the gangsters, the patrons, and their Pokemon, needing to rescue each other again and again as they tried crawling their way up the stairs and out onto the street.\n\nThe front of the bar burst into a steaming, fiery, shimmering mess of multicolor energies and the shouts of drunken men. \n\nSpinel woke up on a little stretcher with Jenny sirens blaring, red and blue lights blinding him again and again as they rotated on the tops of their black trucks. The three who nearly dragged him back to his old life were bound up in cuffs on the ground, being beaten senseless with batons as part of what Spinel was sure was some punishment mandated by some Royal Decree at some point. Emilio was hunched over the scrambler, dissecting it, poking its insides like a maddened scientist. Richard was shoulder to shoulder with five bar goers, slapping backs with hysterical brotherly laughter, wringing nasty fluids from his shirt, his left hand bound up in a hasty blood stained splint. The faces of everyone had been chipped, bruised, and reddened from the fight, but filled with unfathomable joy. \n\nRichard noticed Spinel’s head lifting up and jumped to his side. “Hey, bud. You know those guys?” he asked, pointing to the men slowly being turned into pudding packets on the pavement.\n\nSpinel looked around mareepishly, then his eyes fell to the ground with a sad nod. “{Yeah…}”\n\n“Huh, well, fuck those guys and everyone they grabass with. We got yer back, y’hear?” He picked Spinel up, alarming the teenaged Joy quietly protesting him doing so, and slung him over his shoulder in a mighty hug. Spinel could smell the crusty patches of blood and sweat on Richard’s face, and could feel his heart still pumping with adrenaline through his neck.. “Thanks for a great time, lil guy.”\n\nThat settled it, then and there. If there was any human man worth the risk of getting pressed into state service for, it was him.\n\nForced by his own excitement to wake before Ho-Oh had a chance to drag the sun across the sky, Spinel leapt from the road over the fence of a cute little cottage with a cone of white wrapping paper in one of his ribbons dashing into their flower garden like a wild Scorbunny. He plucked a wiry bundle of white trumpet shaped flowers with long, yellow stamen and carefully arranged them in the cone. “{Honeysuckle, for my pure, endless, devoted affection.}”\n\nHe bolted back out into the streets, trying to remember the places where all his favorite flowers bloomed. He scrambled up onto a baker’s windowsill and stealthily plucked plumes of adorable blue periwinkles. “{I know this is sudden, we’ve only just met.}”\n\nLike a robber avoiding the cops during a string of robberies in the same town, he dashed from tile roof to tile roof, leaping into a well-to-do merchant’s yard. Shouts and curses from several women in unwashed rags out in the morning beating rugs on lines caught him by surprise as he greedily plucked seven long stemmed rosy pink buttercups with centers of glowing yellow petals. “{You are so full of charm, radiant like the sun, gentle as the wind.}”\n\nHe had a lovely arrangement of flowers now, matching his own soft pink, white, and blue coloration. But it was missing the supporting plumage. His message needed something more, something that truly matched how he felt. It came to him finally and he scolded himself as he immediately decided to follow through with his terrible plan. The royal garden apiaries had species of flowers that grew all over the world, and meant many things. One thing was on his mind, and he knew for a fact it grew just over the spiked, wrought iron fences keeping them from the avaricious hands of lovestruck schoolchildren. Unlike those children, though, he reached his bruised tendrils through the bars, taking care to wait for the gardeners to wander off before snatching up fluffy, golden tufts of Yellow Acacia to surround the rest of the bouquet. “{I am your secret lover.}” \n\nHe picked one final flower, a single bloody red Carnation, and stuck it at the top of his arrangement. “{...and my heart aches for you.}”\n\nNobody would’ve batted an eye at a Sylveon wandering the town with a bouquet of flowers in hand; that was about as suspicious a Tauros chewing grass, but it was a spectacle to those who recognized him and got to see the little Eeveelution in such energetic, happy spirits. Folks waved at him and he whistled back, some of them saying they’d heard the news about the bar flooding, others scolding him gently for taking strangers out of the visitor’s ring. He could barely hear any of them over the sound of hope reverberating around in his skull.\n\nBefore the room service carts were due to arrive, Spinel waited around the corner and snuck a do not disturb sign on the outside of Richard’s door handle. He stole a quadruped service uniform from the hotel laundry, one of the female ones with a little black skirt, sprayed himself with a fragrant, floral cologne, and then followed the service cart all the way back to Richard's suite. Room service was always left at the door if there was a no disturb sign out, and sure enough, there was a silver platter with a shimmering dome covering his meal, ready for Spinel to make his move.\n\nHe cleared his throat, adjusted the uniform, suddenly realized it was weird and slutty, tore the thing off, threw it into the garbage, then brushed his fur clean and smelled his own breath before gently knocking on the door.\n\nRichard answered right away, door flying open with reckless abandon, and the sounds of workout tape music could be heard behind him. He had no shirt and had been doing sit ups in baggy Flamigo pajama pants. Spinel had to stop himself from gawking at his exposed ripped abs and instead chose to shyly offer up the platter with the bouquet hidden behind him.\n\n“Whoah! Morning, buddy. You’re way too nice to me, y’know? Come on in, I’m not gonna eat all this myself.” The hotel medical staff had changed out the bandages on Richard’s hand, but it was still bound up like a boxing glove. “Was just thinking of what I was gonna do to try to get at that Valorie gal. Can’t sleep at all just thinking about it. You’re friends with her, you got any ideas?”\n\nSpinel shut the door behind him and joined Richard for breakfast. There was a good chance doing what he was about to do would get him into enough trouble he would end up in the military shoveling waste slop into Poke Diesel engines until his body stopped moving. He waited a good long while before deciding to do this thing, savoring the last few moments where they were still guaranteed to be friends. He pulled apart a muffin, nibbling on it and sipping on his flask for courage. “{Hey, I know you can’t understand me, but I need to tell you something.}” Spinel mused, hoping he’d get some sorta response from his tone of voice.\n\nRichard swallowed a mouthful of bacon and sausage links, dropping a handful that was in line to be devoured. “Mrrf, srry. Ahem. Sorry bud, but I don’t get -”\n\nSpinel hushed him with a gentle touch of the lips with one of his ribbons. He handed Richard the bundle of flowers he’d made that morning, along with a hand penned card written with gorgeous calligraphy. “To the most entrancing one I’ve ever met, my dearest love. Will you be mine?” the card read, decorated with intricate, hand drawn hearts and wildflowers in rosy red ink.\n\nSpinel’s heart went from burning, to warm and fuzzy, to icy cold as Richard’s eyes glanced back and forth between him and the message for a full minute in complete silence.\n\n“Buddy, this… Is this?” Richard asked, face turning beet red with embarrassment.\n\nSpinel turned with a shy little giggle and forced a blush on his own cheeks, a skill he’d acquired in his old work. A cute charm worked just as well on a human if you were subtle about it. “Syyyllllveeeeooon,” he cooed quietly, with no real meaning in his Pokespeech other than trying to seem as sincere and alluring as possible. \n\n“I, oh gosh. Buddy, I…” Richard sat down, looked at the flowers, played with the petals of the carnation between his thumb and forefinger. \n\nSpinel walked up to Richard and rubbed his whole body, head to haunches, against his legs with a soothing pur. “{Please say yes,}” he uttered to himself. “{Pleeeeeease say yes.}”\n\nRichard’s head snapped up with a manic, enthusiastic smile. “My ‘mon, this is just what I needed.”\n\nSpinel’s head tilted in surprise, a ribbon scratching his cheek in confusion. “{Huh?}”\n\n“Y’know, I never got why my ‘cuz and Em spend so much time with their ‘mon after hours. I get it now!” Richard chuckled softly, hustled over to the bed where all of his things had migrated like a flock of Swanna ‘round a community pond, and kicked his pants off to the side on the floor. “Man, you have no idea how much I’ve been needing something like this.”\n\nSpinel’s heart started pounding as he got a good look at the guy’s perfectly sculpted ass, illuminated like a star player of a broadway play by the morning light shining in from the third-storey window. He started fanning himself, checked the locks on the door, and started plotting his domination of Richard’s flesh as he ambled forward like a newborn Deerling. Oh, Arceus, was this happening right now ? Even with how straightforward Spinel was being he hadn’t expected such a fiery reaction to his declaration of love, not that he was going to complain as he got his tendrils all over that smooth, strong, muscular body of his. His chest practically shook with anticipation and his ribbons curled in excitement for all the ways he was going to wrap him up, snuggle into his chest, and…\n\nRichard laid the flowers onto the bed and started getting dressed. “I was so stupid, hahaha.”\n\nSpinel realized something was wrong and quickly sat around the corner of the bed, trying to hide the raging erection that had slithered past the slit in his fur between his hind legs. He watched and listened, knowing that nothing he said would have made any sense to this poor man, and that writing anything down would have incriminated them both.\n\nRich threw on a pair of sweatpants, a sweatshirt, donned a pair of holey socks, then slipped on his streetworn sneakers. “I came on way too strong. You Kalos folk love the classics, that’s what you’re all about, right? Yeah, this is exactly what I need to start over with Val.” He hastily tried to clip his Pokeball rack on, but it slipped off and fell into his suitcase as he darted away.\n\nSpinel’s swagger deflated like a two-day-old birthday balloon. “{But…}”\n\nRichard ruffled the ‘mon’s head, totally oblivious to Spinel’s look of pure, unfettered dumbfoundedness. “C’mon, buddy. Let’s go together,” he huffed as he jogged in place, bouquet and letter in his sweaty clutches. “I’m gonna trust you with this stuff from now on, if you don’t mind. Who best to ask about love than a Sylveon, right? Gods, I shoulda thought of this sooner.”\n\n“{Y-yeah… I guess a stroll sounds… good…}” Spinel replied with a forced, hollow enthusiasm, and scampered off behind Richard down the hall.\n\n\n\n\n\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/\n\n\n\n\nValorie meticulously built seven little stacks of gold and silver coins atop a smooth plastic, neon red countertop that reminded her of the little wagons everyone scrimped and saved for as a kid. Beside them was a tiny book of hand-torn coupon clippings from a myriad of modest sources.\n\nA middle aged Joy fidgeted with her pink and white service dress as her very intense, poorly groomed customer meticulously plucked the tender from a green canvas waist-satchel, scribbled numbers down into a grimy little notepad, and then placed them down with audible clinks. Her eyes shifted to the line of frustrated nobility and peasantry that wound around the lobby.\n\nClink\n\nClink\n\nVal grumbled something to herself, scratched out a note, and removed one of the coins, replacing it with one of a smaller denomination. \n\nJoy chuckled weakly and cleared her throat, “Miss?” she asked, with a faint quiver in her voice.\n\n“Hmm?” Val grunted, peering up from her accounts.\n\nJoy beamed with what appeared to be pure, genuine delight, a skill she’d gained after decades of service at this one singular job, as she held out a gracious palm. “I’d be happy to count that out for you.”\n\nVal shook her head and brushed the clone’s porcelain skinned fingers away. “Not a chance.”\n\nClink\n\nScribble\n\nClink\n\nThe corner of Val’s mouth scrunched up into a pained grimace, then she brushed a strand of hair from her eyes and huffed in frustration. “No, that’s not right, Joy. Could you please do it old school?”\n\nThe crowd behind her erupted into tired sounds of displeasure and rolling heads.\n\nOne of Joy’s bright blue eyes twitched a little, her cool, steely servitude starting to give way to the boiling exhaustion she felt. She collected bulk medicines from the back, took the expensive ones out of the case, dealt with the overly detailed questions, fought the doctor for approval for a few of them on this lady’s behalf, and grinned for the pleasure to serve. She did this every single minute, of every single hour, of every single day of her simple existence. The computer did the math. Yeah, she could whip out the abacus and scratch lines in the sand like a caveperson, but-\n\n“Of course, one moment, Miss!” Joy dumped all the medicines off the counter into a waffled polymer basket and bounded off with bona fide happiness towards the back room. “Doctor! This customer would like a hard count.”\n\nThe Doctor, a middle aged  Kantonian lady with harsh washboard wrinkles squinted and shook her head. “Policy, Number Seventy-Four. What does policy say?”\n\nJoy tilted her head. “Which one, Doctor? There’s so many.”\n\nShe scowled and stood from her office chair, gaining a whopping six intimidating inches of height. “Deflect, Direct, and Collect.”\n\nJoy chuckled and shrugged. “Ah, my mistake. I was thinkingggg… Pokemed, Bluebook, Chapter four: ‘All requests of a manual count for a total order exceeding fifty-thousand pokedollars will be honored by supervisory staff review. Mandated under the decision of Dahara v. Sylph Co.”\n\nThe utterly joyless woman shoved her way past, tiny black high heels stabbing the linoleum. Well, at least she wished she was Joyless. She would have traded her insolent code cuddling clone for three handsome, underpaid gym jockeys any day.\n\n“Your total is eighty thousand, fifty five,” she blurted out.\n\nValorie rocked with an impatient sigh that rolled down the line of shoppers like a wave. “No it's not, Lady. Drink some coffee and count again, aight? Pretty sure it’s… ah…” she squinted at the mess of Torchic scratches in her notebook. “Seven two zero two five.”\n\nWithout any warning the turbulent old woman clicked to a halt, then she abruptly made an about-face, yanked the basket out of Joy Number Seventy Four’s clutches, and ran her fingers through boxes, bottles, and blister packs like she was carefully counting documents in a filing cabinet drawer. Finally, she squinted through her tiny rectangular glasses at the coupons at the bottom of the basket strewn like autumn leaves tracked in from the rain.\n\n“What was the register total?” She huffed, red in the face.\n\nJoy was stunned at the visceral, furious reaction, and at the fastest hand count ever demonstrated by man. “Eighty-three-thousand, five-hundred and one Pokedollars. Taxes and duties included.”\n\nThe doctor shook her head, suddenly sober with humility, allowing her stern composure to recrystalize. “The ‘Five-and-a-Full-Heal Deal’ isn’t coded right this week. Accurate total is Seventy-two-thousand, twenty-five.” She tore a little pink coupon free from a roll hanging on the wall. “And 500 off her next visit.”\n\nJoy bounced back to life. Finally, normalcy had been restored. She started wrapping the delicate items up and then punched in the price override code the Doctor had accidentally disclosed to her on a random hangover day. “Our apologies, Miss. There was a miscode for some of your items. As a token of our apologies, feel free to use this on your next purchase.”\n\nValorie held the all–together rather nicely arranged paper shopping bag, printed with a smiling Pichu in a nurse’s hat, surprised. She peered at the voucher and her face screwed up in confusion. “Th…Thanks, Joy.” Shit, when was the next time she was gonna step foot in this place? She swiped up a roll of double strength cinnamon pepper poppers from a candy rack, then shoved the voucher towards Joy as she raised the candies up in defiance. “I’m taking this!”\n\nJoy chuckled. “My pleasure. Have a good day!” Then, without Valorie present, she rang up the candy, scanned the coupon, and gasped a little at the sudden red, blinking letters reading, ‘Purchaser not Present.’ She typed in the override again, sure that her manager wouldn’t want to be bothered with such a petty issue.\n\nContrary to that belief, the Doctor, having observed Valorie’s microscopic slip-up, waited five whole minutes before she clawed at the yellowing plastic dialpad of her desk phone with long, glossy black fingernails. “Hello. Yes, this is Doctor Ito. Medmart, yes... I’d like to report a crime.”\n\n\n\n\n\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/\n\n\n\n\nPrince Meyer had finally shaken off his retinue. It was the second day of their grand tournament, and also daddy day! He brushed his beard with a silver comb as he marveled at the young adults his children had matured into. Yes, the two of them had wound up into a rich spaghetti’s swirl of strategies and game plans even after only seeing the first of many glorious destructive ballets. He was all too happy to sit aside with his spiked Afogato and listen as they rehearsed their own parts in the show. \n\nA beautiful morning filled with the sights and sounds of pricelessness, soiled only by the faint wailing of police sirens deep within the cityscape. \n\n“Hau’s tidal rush is going to be a big problem. I propose an item based solution!” Clemont said, fist raised in preemptive triumph. “Two of our Pokemon aren’t equipped up to league allowances, after all.”\n\nHis younger, less energetic sibling shook her head and bit into a cured-spoink crêpe. “Nuuu, you lose points that way if we run out of time! Wasn’t that one of your Brilliant strategies, egghead?”\n\nAh yes, the sounds of the players addressing each other’s makeup and dress. Chaotic? Yes, but that is the way a roiling pot of creatives should be! \n\nSpeaking of players…\n\n“Careful, you two. The antagonists arrive, stage left.”\n\nThe two of them slapped their faces shut with both palms as they saw Richard jogging in the street with an intricately arranged assortment of freshly plucked flowers, shaken bare like a witch’s broom. He reeked of sweat, gray sweatshirt stained at the pits, dragging a pink and white shadow in his wake.\n\nMeyer squinted. “Oh, Courage has found his footing at the precipice once more?”\n\nBonnie’s head tilted in confusion as her brother frowned in frustration. “Huh?”\n\nBeep beep beep beep. \n\nMeyer reached into his cloak, hiding a little repurposed ‘Monogatchi toy chassis with an LCD screen in the shape of a Blaziken head. \n\nClemont started scarfing down his grapes and pickled pecha, chewing hard with a fork clutched tightly in one hand.\n\nThe little screen showed a picture of Valorie. No… Seaman specialist, first class, Valorie de Blanc. Wanted for desertion, absconsion with navy materiel, assault of a superior officer… and shoplifting.\n\n“A de Blanc?” Meyer whispered to himself as his attention dialed in like a critic ready to scathe the performing troupe in the next morning’s print. “Scandalous,” he said as he only then began to realize those police sirens were getting louder.\n\nThen, like a curtain lifting before his eyes, Valorie waltzed onto the stage counting a handful of shiny copper coins in her palm. The crowds of the city square seemed to move aside, glossing his blessed eyes over with the scene he had hoped to witness all along. “A long, drawn out derivative of a timeless classic, Lord Enamorous,” he muttered, sipping his coffee with a smirk. “Let’s see the end, then.”\n\nBonnie seemed happy at her father’s calm demeanor. What a pleasant day this had turned out to be. Oh, was that guy gonna propose? How adorable! That must be what father is so excited about. No better place and no better time to show the woman of your dreams your deepest desires then in the Golden Ring of Lumiose!\n\nClemont’s spine loosened a bit as he squinted at his father’s distraction with the gushy monologue that surely was coming. “Whew. I was worried there for a minute.” A mechanical tendril with a little three-fingered hand pressed a handkerchief to his lips and then retracted into his backpack. \n\nRichard fell to one knee onto the rough cobblestone street, clumsily smashing it in the process. The way Devotion had been characterized in this rendition, he fully expected him to jeer and chuckle at Courage’s misfortune, but this did not occur. Instead, the tired looking Sylveon reached forward with his tendrils as if to say, “oh no!”\n\nAnd, perched at the peak of her lair, Passion stood before him with eyes empty of jest. \n\nRichard lunged forward with the bouquet like a sword towards a mighty beast, showering her boots in wilting petals. “For you, my lady of Kalos!” he said, putting his bundled up hand to his chest in a gesture of humility.\n\nWhat a strange composition you have penned, oh Lord! \n\nDevotion, seeing his master at the moment of salvation, tears up, a face full of… sadness? No, anguish! Courage, instead of having gained the strength of his comrades, is a tattered, sweaty mess, throwing himself at Passion’s feet like a starving Growlithe begging for a bowl of scraps. And in what distorted place was Prudence hiding?!\n\nValorie’s face scrunched up into a paper ball of pity. “Dude, you just don’t give up, do you?”\n\nRichard shook his head, panting now that his mind had realized he was finally at rest. “I never give up.” He stood, shaking the pain out of his knee, and moved closer with the flowers. He tried his absolute best to remember the notes Sylveon had written on the paper he accidentally dropped a mile back on the road.  “You… You are my greatest, dearest, entrancing love!”\n\nMeyer and his son both wished for a snack bucket to puke into.\n\nBonnie held her hands together with saucer-wide eyes. “Aaaaawwww!”\n\nValorie turned her head away from him, unable to even look at his tragic display. “Seriously, forget it, I’m already taken.”\n\nMeyer’s jaw fell to the floor. Was the programme misprinted? Was he actually watching the Tragedy of Two Homes all along?\n\nRichard looked at the flowers, tossed them aside, and started barking at Valorie like she was an opponent across the arena, index finger pointed towards her. “I don’t care! You’re the most amazing woman I’ve ever met, and I’ll stop at nothing until I’ve caught you all for myself. I’ll be everything you could ever want.” He lurched forward and caught her palms together in his hands. “I promise.”\n\nHer eyes glanced down at the space right where a tail might have gone above his ass, brushed the top of his head where some big fluffy ears might have played against her skin, ran her thumb over his dull, harmless fingernails. “No, you won't …. and you never will.”\n\nShe pushed him to his ass and marched away, wedging herself through a gap in the crowd with the bag of medicines slung over her shoulder. “Just forget I ever existed, rich boy.”\n\nBonnie had fallen to her knees, eyes wet with devastated tears. Clemont teetered over in his chair, laughing hysterically at the upset. The crowd didn’t react in any discernible way. \n\nBut all Meyer could feel in his heart was rage! What a horrible farce this was! No, it had to be a test, he was sure of it now. He reached into his cloak, clutched the image of Valorie on the communications gadget, staring at it with brutal intensity.\n\nClemont recognized the dour look on his father’s face immediately and he tugged at his cloak in distress. “No, Dad! You promised! You promised you’d be there with us at the Tournament.”\n\nMeyer’s face, like that of an actor under warm tinted lights, grinned and twirled his cape as he walked away. “Do no despair, my most beloved son. Like the titular hero of the Monomyth, I always arrive when I am needed most; save my seat…. Carlisle!”\n\nFrom a different table, a man with a pudgy nose in a fine three piece suit came out from his hiding place behind a massive sheet of newspaper, sipping an exact copy of Meyer’s drink of choice. “Of course, sir. Come along, young masters. I believe we’re scheduled to visit the aquarium next. How delightful.”\n\nBonnie and Clemont followed Carlisle like a pair of stormclouds, leaving a stack of golden coins on the table for the half finished food. Spinel had wrapped his tendrils around Richard’s shoulders, his little head resting on Richard’s hunched back, rubbing his shoulders in an attempt to soothe his pain. Through those tendril’s, though, he didn’t feel any pain at all. In fact, what he felt was some strange kind of morbid joviality.\n\nRichard whipped around and wrapped his arms around Spinel, who squeaked at the sudden embrace. “Nah, nah buddy. Gramps always said… If ya stop when it starts hurtin’, ya bled out for nothin'.”\n\nSpinel’s eyes watered and he nuzzled Richard’s face. “{Right, no sense in stopping now, huh.}”\n\nMeyer smiled as he disappeared into the darkness of the alley, pulling a red mask over his head. “Break a leg, Courage.”\n\nThe siren call of the police trucks finally reached a crescendo as people dashed out of the way to dodge their massive ashen tires. Three trucks with two Jennies each kicked the doors wide open, looking regal and commanding in the white and gold uniforms of the elite inner city task forces. \n\n“Madame Valerie de Blanc, for your crimes against the Crown and its people, you are under arrest!” yelled the oldest of the six Jennies, proudly decorated with glistening golden epaulets over her shoulders and an intricately woven, crimson aiguillette dangling down her chest.\n\nTwelve white leather gloves gripped six menacing, modern submachine guns trained on Valerie’s center of mass. And as her own weary fingers trembled in place, unsure of which desperate move would claw her way to freedom, Val steeled herself for the worst of all outcomes with deep, heavy breathing.\n\nRichard stood defiantly, chest puffing in the face of the police. “Hey, she hasn’t done anything–”\n\nSpinel’s ribbons wrapped around Richard's mouth and his limbs, frantically trying to keep him from getting them both shot. “{Shut up!}”\n\nA circle of bodies had traced itself around the scene. Gawking, slack jawed faces eyed the situation while emotionally charged bystanders jeered at the police on impulse despite the truth. \n\nOne of the officer’s guns snapped to Richard as he was prying Spinel’s ribbons away from his mouth. “Remain where you are, Civilian.”\n\nRich pulled Spinel off his face like a tightly wound scarf, “Lay off it, she can have our lawyers.”\n\nValerie’s eyes darted back and forth between Richard and the Officers. “Shut up.”\n\n“Let them take you, I’ll make sure you get out of–”\n\n“Shut! Up!” Val shouted, then flinched as several of the officers jumped at her sudden animation.\n\nSpinel squealed in terror as Richard’s powerful legs dragged them both towards the officer trained on him. “Listen, lady. We can work this out,” he said, palms out, signaling his good intentions.\n\n“Get back!” Jenny kicked him square in the chest, launching him up into the air, and rolled him across the cobblestones ten feet back. Richard’s head rang with her command, like his head had been left inside a struck bell. \n\nHe couldn’t move, he couldn’t speak, he was pretty sure something came unset in his already injured fist. Somewhere between Spinel trying to bind him up into a pink straight-jacket for his own safety and the unbelievable force of the Jenny Unit’s boot on his chest he lost every ounce of his previously endless supply of macho virility. \n\n“Hands behind your head and knees on the ground. Now!” the Sergeant barked to Valerie. “Nice and easy, nobody else needs to get hurt, de Blanc.”\n\nValerie’s hands fidgeted, slowly, tingling from the elbows down. Her fingers clutched and crumpled the Pokemart bag, her mind frantically obsessing over the thought of this most precious kind of cargo wasting away in an evidence bin while a tree stump full of dying infants needed it most.\n\nBoth hands reached behind her head, sweaty palms threatening to grip the worn maplewood stock of the faithful weapon slung to her back. It’s said about guns and lovers , she thought, only one of them was guaranteed to be there ‘til death do us part.’\n\nNah, she had to give her Fenny credit. He would have stupidly stood his ground and died with her too, no matter how much she begged for him to run. He sure did jam up a lot more than the rifle, though.\n\nVal got down to her knees and slowly placed the package in front of her. “This isn’t mine, I stole it from them,” she said, pointing to Spinel and Richard. “If I give it back, can I get that offense scratched off?”\n\nOne officer nodded, then gestured with her weapon. “Push it away with your foot.”\n\nVal winked at Spinel as she took in one final breath, kicking the bag towards them. “{You make sure Fenny gets this, y’hear?}”\n\nSpinel’s eyes widened in horror as he watched the color leave Valorie’s face. “{Val, don’t!}”\n\nSuddenly, everyone’s tensions spun to a wild freefall and evaporated into a haze of confusion as all the loudspeakers of the city square began playing a familiar, trumpeting fanfare. The crowd started murmuring, then chittered with pockets of excitement.\n\n“Thank goodness!”\n\n“It's him!”\n\n“Surely that’s his call!”\n\n“Bite a switch, swine, haha!”\n\n“The Mask will fix this!”\n\nSix white gloved hands left their weapons and smacked the faces of six tired, overworked civil servants. “Oh for the love of Arceus, not this!” Sergeant Jenny groaned as fireworks popped out of nowhere, creating a dense screen of multicolor smoke and confetti that surrounded the restaurant.\n\nValerie’s arms drooped to her sides as the truckload of Adrenaline rampaging through her body suddenly had absolutely nothing to do. “What the fuck?”\n\nAt the top of the entrance to the cafe stood a tall, proud Blaziken with a vermilion cape. To his side was a man in a colorful, armored costume matching his Pokemon’s natural colors, wearing a menacing Blaziken themed mask which hid the man’s identity from his foes. Journalists and camera crews were trying to swim their way through the sea of onlookers, happy to pad their quota with an appearance of the city’s legendary do-gooder. He laughed like he just heard the punchline to a magnificent joke whispered in his ear and pointed a black-gloved finger towards the officers as the crowd exploded with applause.\n\n“Excellent work, Officers, but your work here is done! I shall deal with this miscreant.” The Mask announced.\n\nSergeant Jenny shrugged and chuckled, waving it off like it was nothing. “Ahaaa, Blaziken Maaask. No need to get yourself involved. I’m sure there’s so many other things your capable hands should be tackling right now. Much appreciated, though.”\n\nRichard peeled his head free again. “HELP! She didn’t do anything wrong, I swear!”\n\nSpinel mummified Richard’s head for a third time.\n\n“I know this Woman’s crimes, and as this city’s Ultimate Arbiter of Justice I absolve her of all of them,” The Mask said, and the crowd roared at the declaration.\n\nThe Jennies stood their ground. “That would be our pleasure, My Lord. But your powers are limited here. You see, she has committed horrible atrocities against Kalos as a whole! I’m afraid she must be taken in. We can scratch off the shoplifting charge, though!” The crowd hissed and booed as bits of food, empty bottles, and cigarette butts rained upon them.\n\nHe laughed again. “Oh, what a horrid predicament. My goodness, isn’t there a member of the royal family, or one of their MOST ESTEEMED GUESTS who could represent her in a duel for her honor?”\n\nRichard bit Spinel’s ribbons and they unfurled. “I CAN! I will duel for my Lady’s honor!”\n\nFinally the situation managed to decompile in Val’s skull as she grabbed for the absolutely ridiculous lifeline being extended to her. She mentally brushed up on manners of speech she hadn’t used in over a decade, put her hands up, clasped them together, and bowed towards Richard. “Oh, the Chivalry! Finest of men, will you duel on my behalf and redeem me of my wrongdoings?” The pride she swallowed went down like a mouthful of hot gravel.\n\nSpinel hung from Richard like a web of torn up tinsel hanging from a tree as Richard raised his bandaged fist up in the air like a knight ready to vanquish his foes. “For your love, Val, I would do anything! I shall duel you, Jennies!”\n\nThe Mask nodded with appeasement. “Very well, courageous man! Choose your contest!”\n\nRichard was inflated again with hope and confidence. “I challenge you, Jennies… to a League regulation Pokemon Battle!”\n\n“So it shall be. Officers, prepare yourselves and select your challenger!” The Mask commanded, then stood with arms crossed, mirroring his Pokemon partner’s stance.\n\nThe Jennies huddled together in confusion. “Who? What? How?”\n\n“You’re supposed to have up to six ‘mon, you do it like on the Tele, ma’am!”\n\n“You should do it, Sarge! Only one of us can.”\n\n“Why me?!”\n\nThe smallest of the Jennies saluted. “You’re the oldest and the wisest, and we all trust you with our lives. You can have my Arcanine!”\n\nThe other four reached for their service balls and handed them off to their superior officer. \n\n“Let’s do it, squad!” Sergeant Jenny said, hands on her hips with pride, ready with a full team.\n\nRichard reached for his belt and found nothing but the exposed waistband of his boxer shorts. “Shit!”\n\nSpinel saw the panic and removed himself from Richard’s body, brushed his fur straight, and then stood by his man’s side. He sighed, realizing that what he was about to do was absolute idiocy, but knowing for sure that he would have hated himself for the rest of his life if he decided on doing anything else. “{I’ll fight for you, Richard.}”\n\nRichard’s arms pumped with Excitement. “Aw yeah! Don’t you worry, Sylveon. I’ve trained with all sorts of fairy types, we’re gonna destroy these fools.”\n\nSix full sized, fully evolved Pokemon appeared in front of the Sergeant; massive Arcanines in bulky assault vests looking unnerved as they took in the riotous scene around them. \n\nSpinel pushed his fear aside and stepped forward with his chest puffed out. “{Oh gods…}”\n\n\n\n\n\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/\n\n\n\n\nMeanwhile, on the edge of this debacle, Emilio and Vaporeon were exploring the city after having been up for Pokespeech lessons with Val at the ass-crack-dawn. Having seen the crowd forming in real time, he decided not to involve himself in whatever was going on, full stop. He heard police sirens, and the last time cops were involved he almost got shot. So, to make his lover not have to worry about his safety again, they stopped into a little bakery that still had people around to take his money and sat themselves down for a quiet breakfast of croissants and coffee as the drama blew over. The lack of any prying eyes even offered him the luxury of a stolen kiss or two with the beauty wrapped around his shoulders as they waited for their food.\n\nVaporeon hissed and Emil jumped as a news-camera was thrust in his face. “You! You’re Emilio Mallison, right?”\n\nEmil stuttered and answered out of instinct. “Y-yeah.”\n\n“Good to meet you, sir! A question, if I may.”\n\nEmilio had answered a billion questions on camera at this point, in fact he was legally obligated to, if a few more made this guy go away he was happy to do so. “Sure, only one, though,” he replied, then sipped from his cup.\n\n“What do you think of your partner battling with the police to save a ruthless, wanted criminal?”\n\n“Pfft! What?!” Emil spat, showering the table in dark roast.\n\n“Yes, it's happening right now in the city square. Is he normally so reckless?”\n\nEmil dropped some coins on the counter as Vaporeon shoved the camera away with her tail. “That was your one question. I gotta go see a man about a fish, bye.”\n\n\n\n\n\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/\n\n\n\n\n“Sylveon, I choose you!” Richard commanded, and Spinel walked towards the empty, impromptu arena, cheered on by the crowd..\n\n“Arcanine, I choose you!” Jenny ordered.\n\nThe six canine ‘mon looked around at each other, perplexed, then looked cutely at their commanding officer. “Nine?”\n\nShe pointed to the nearest one. “You! Ugh, blend me, this is so ridiculous!”\n\nSpinel’s whole existence had been spent doing literally anything other than fighting, he’d made every effort to avoid bruises and the uncomfortable feeling of bleeding to death as a matter of habit. So he prepared to follow all of Richard’s instructions, hoping beyond hope that one of the many, powerful gods he never made offerings to would shine on him with just one of the many favors they owed him for the difficult life he’d led. Of course he wanted Richard to win this, but even more than that he wanted to make it up to Val for saving his life all those years ago. The thought of it steeled his resolve further and he cried out to the Arcanine across the expanse in the bright, musical way he hadn’t been compelled to since he evolved.\n\n“That's the spirit, buddy!” Richard said.\n\nThe mask raised his palm. “Ready?”\n\n“WAIT, Godsdammit wait!” Emil yelled, glasses nearly falling from his face as he pulled himself out from the crowd like he was prying himself free from a crack in a cliff face. \n\nRichard sighed with relief. “Oh, Em! Oh my gods! Did you bring–”\n\nVaporeon jumped off Emil’s shoulders and slapped Richard across the face with the fins of her tail as she landed beside him. “{Idiot,}” she scoffed, then peered over at Spinel standing in front of a hungry, vicious canine. “{You lost or something?}”\n\nSpinel rubbed the back of his head. “{Y-Yeah, dunno how I ended up in this mess, but I can’t back out now.}”\n\nVaporeon shrugged, sat squat beside her trainer, and smiled. “{Don’t worry, builds character. I’ll be here to scrape you up when you run out of steam.}”\n\nC'est la vie , Spinel thought, brushing the fur of his ears neat and tidy for his time in the spotlight.",
  "writing_bbcode_parsed": "<span style='word-wrap: break-word;'><div class='align_center'>Forbidden Waters &ndash; 16</div><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />There&rsquo;s an old Kalosian poem, aged as Arceus&rsquo; timeworn hooves, recited time and again to the deafened ears of stupor stricken lovers young and old; it goes like this&hellip;<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><div class='align_center'>Petit &agrave; petit, l&rsquo;mon fait son nid.<br /><br />(Little by little, the &lsquo;mon makes its nest.)<br /><br />C&#039;est queue est tourn&eacute;e vers la Douleur Exquise qui vient.<br /><br />(Its tail turned towards the Exquisite Pain that comes.)<br /><br />En esp&eacute;rant la chaleur d&#039;un amant dans une autre maison.<br /><br />(Hoping for the warmth of a lover in another home.)</div><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />Spinel danced along Lumiose&rsquo;s ochre dawnlit streets, hopping across the cobbles like stones in a stream, sailing on the freshly made memories of his best night out in years. It didn&rsquo;t seem like it was going to be at first, though. Actually, it kinda seemed like it was gonna end as a disaster too!&nbsp;<br /><br />The Stone Team had seemed to enjoy Spinel&rsquo;s company enough that they kept dragging him around to lavish meals and swanky social functions, but in the haze of admiration he completely forgot his place in the world. As he followed them into the Stone Crown someone had complained to arena management that an unsupervised Pokemon was taking up a prime-time seat, so just as the first match was about to begin a group of staff members had arrived with menacing, metal spiked &lsquo;moncatcher poles, ready to show his pink tuchus the dumpsters.<br /><br />&ldquo;Oh, he&rsquo;s not bugging me,&rdquo; Richard had said aloud, brushing aside the stiff-necked ushers. When the manager insisted, reaching for Spinel&#039;s throat with bared steel jaws, Richard smacked it aside and got up. &ldquo;He can have my seat, then, asshole.&rdquo;<br /><br />Threatened with the humiliation of having to drag one of the guests of the palace out onto the street, they melted away like ice left to face the rays of the midday sun.<br /><br />His savior smirked with satisfaction and plopped him right onto his lap. Spinel was so stunned by the public gesture of support that all he could do was blush and curl his ribbons around himself like a gift wrapped apple as everyone gawked in amazement.&rdquo;{You shouldn&rsquo;t do that for me&hellip;}&rdquo; he squeaked, crushed beneath the disapproving gaze of the crowd.<br /><br />Richard&rsquo;s light erased the shade of the offended onlookers in an instant as he noticed Spinel shriveling up like a dried plum, and jostled his shoulders. &ldquo;Haha, don&rsquo;t worry about it, lil guy. Show me all the best places in town and we&rsquo;re even, kay?&rdquo;<br /><br />So, against his better judgment, he did just that.<br /><br />He showed them the Centrico Plaza, made sure they got to see its glamorous gold and marble statues surrounded by the perfectly manicured &lsquo;mon-shaped topiaries, but stopped them from going anywhere near the shops. No no, those places were salivating tourist traps, bred to shake coin purses empty for overpriced, middling luxuries.&nbsp;<br /><br />He dipped into his own funds and quietly greased the palms of a few palace guides tasked with ensuring Prince Meyer&rsquo;s guests didn&rsquo;t leave the land of milk and honey, slipping them right past and into his home turf; South Boulevard Village. He snagged them a killer lunch of Crawdaunt chowder and baguettes for mates rates. Rather than suffering the pompous Pikouture Sucr&eacute;e, he knocked on the door of kind old Mrs. Suker, convincing her to open her little shop of homemade rustic delights on her day off. Forget that mass produced tat sold along the golden loop, Spinel dragged them through a garden of market stalls, swap meets, and flea markets along the outer walls, harvesting up baskets of commemorative bounty for his esteemed guests. Instead of sipping down thousands of Pokedollars from criminally priced glasses at La Coupe Saphir, he took them on a tour of all the tastiest independent breweries and cheesemongers, personally vouching for them to join the festivities of the locally revered daytaler haunt in the basement of Mains Vides that evening.&nbsp;<br /><br />Drunk with wonderful company, blinded by Richard&rsquo;s glow, Spinel missed the gang of sour-faced pimp-hands following them into the bar.&nbsp;<br /><br />Richard was utterly entrancing to him, a silver tongued enigma. The man could sing in any unpracticed broken key he damn well pleased and the world would have danced to his tune. When he smiled and clapped people on the shoulders they locked step with him so tight he could have walked them off bridges. Anyhuman else he&rsquo;d seen commanding the same gregarious powers dragged a long dark shadow of sociopathy behind them, ready to split anyone&rsquo;s throat at a moment&#039;s notice. At any point in his life Richard could have summoned up a swarm of opportunistic parasites ready to live off his scraps, but instead he seemed content to stay wrapped up in a warm cloud of prosocial merriment. He couldn&rsquo;t help but gaze from afar, smiling like a Quagsire, as the guy led the entire tavern in a raucous, intoxicated line dance in a language he didn&rsquo;t even understand.<br /><br />Distortion damn this beautiful city, she cursed me with love again.<br /><br />&nbsp;A man with a mop of greasy black hair obscuring a face covered in scars grinned down at him. &ldquo;Guess what they say is true, ain&rsquo;t it boys?&rdquo; Spinel shook awake as the surly voice croaked from a seat to his right.<br /><br />An old bar stool was kicked along the cement floor over to his left, creaking as a flabby, overweight man with a roughly shaven head sat down carrying a heavy equipment case with him. &ldquo;Wait long enough and any uppity whore eventually comes crawling back home.&rdquo;<br /><br />Spinel&rsquo;s spine chilled stiff as the jagged, rock hard fingers of a third gangster cinced him down to his stool. &ldquo;Got a lotta clients be real happy know&rsquo;n yer mouth is open for business again.&rdquo;<br /><br />Spinel started trying to shove himself free, drawing up his energies for a hypervoice, but squeaked in shock as the two men on either side of him tied his ribbons up into painful knots and he felt the prick of something being jammed up into his belly. The one standing behind him slowly, quietly, dragged Spinel and the stool he was sitting on behind the bar to a dark wine cellar. Out of sight, out of mind.<br /><br />What was wrong with him? He was a Pokemon, dammit! He was stronger than any of these bozo&rsquo;s combined, a single round of rough play woulda left them all begging for casts in the charity hospice. But his body felt weak, his claws refused to unfurl, his tendrils were bundled up uselessly like damp ships ropes. He struggled to keep the lids of his beautiful sapphire eyes fluttering open as his head was pressed into a wooden rack, wedged between two twenty-year-old Persim Berry wine bottles.<br /><br />&ldquo;{Hhh&hellip; hee&hellip; heeeel- Ooof}&rdquo; Spinel called out weakly, hoping anyone would hear his plea, but a muscular elbow knocked the wind from his sails, leaving his mouth agape as he tried desperately to fill his lungs with air again.<br /><br />An unwashed finger, knobbled from years of broken knuckles healing over, jammed between Spinel&rsquo;s sharp, feline teeth and pried his jaw open, inspecting him like a working Mudsdale. &ldquo;Yeah, still perfect. Guess all that running yer mouth has kept it in shape.&rdquo; Then he reached down to his underside and started working the same filthy finger, wet with Spinel&rsquo;s own spittle, up into the Sylveon&rsquo;s ass.&nbsp;<br /><br />Spinel&rsquo;s hackles raised and his tail bottlebrushed as he growled, helplessly bucking and kicking at the man&rsquo;s belly. He wanted nothing less than to spill his fat guts onto the floor like a barrel of spoiled cognac.<br /><br />&ldquo;Ass is nice and tight again. Might take a spin myself, when we get back,&rdquo; he croaked from a parched throat, then smacked Spinel across the temple for the crime of biting his thumb. &ldquo;Shut the damn door, man. Can&rsquo;t go disturbing the natives.&rdquo;<br /><br />Spinel&rsquo;s legs went limp, out of energy to put up a fight under whatever drug they&rsquo;d injected him with.&nbsp;<br /><br />&ldquo;I&rsquo;ll get the registration scrubber. Hold still, slut.&rdquo;<br /><br />Tears welled up in his eyes, dripping onto the floor in fat plops. He prepared himself for the agony of the scrubber, like being tattooed throughout your entire body for minutes on end of what felt like endless torture, and then getting claimed by the inevitable bootleg Love Ball that would become his new prison. He&rsquo;d worked so hard to escape this hell, but threw away everything Valorie, Captain Clemens, and everyone else had done for him to get out. And for what? Some human guy who shouldn&rsquo;t, wouldn&rsquo;t, couldn&rsquo;t ever want him the same way Spinel did? Damn his stupid, hopeful, amorous heart!&nbsp;<br /><br />&ldquo;Let&rsquo;s go, buddy,&rdquo; he imagined hearing Richard&rsquo;s voice faintly behind the buzzing in his ears.<br /><br />The bald man held up a bulky lunchbox shaped device with a huge lens on the front that projected a fan of blue lasers. It prickled his skin as they danced across his paws and then he winced as they moved up to his wrists and cranked it up to full power.. &ldquo;Welcome home, Cherry.&rdquo;<br /><br />It was ok, he told himself. He&rsquo;d find another way out. He couldn&rsquo;t ask Val to stick her neck out for him again, it was his own stupid fault he got back into this mess. He&rsquo;d convince someone to crush his Pokeball, run far enough fast enough so the commands couldn&rsquo;t be felt, find some way to poison and kill everyone in the brothel. Something. Anything.<br /><br />&ldquo;Hey, Sylveon!&rdquo; he heard again, a figment of his addled mind.<br /><br />One of them started digging through his little saddle bags, raining his few precious possessions onto the floor like refuse found at the bottom of a thrift-store purse. &ldquo;Little slut&rsquo;s been busy. Nice chunk &lsquo;o dough in here,&rdquo; one of the men said as they pocketed his coin pouches.<br /><br />Even the drugs couldn&rsquo;t stop him from shrieking as the energies in his body were shunted around at random, smudged around like a child would with finger paints, but he was eventually choked into silence with a hand around his neck as the scanner ran up his legs. It was like that every single time, like a Slugma eating you alive but you&rsquo;re only able to gaze at your own body in horror as you were melted from the toes up.&nbsp;<br /><br />A crashing noise. His vision started to glisten with red and purple stars from the pain.<br /><br />It was ok, he thought. The instruments and singing outside the cellar soothed him a little as it wound down to a close. At least he got to feel wanted by a man he desired, even if it wasn&rsquo;t real in the end.&nbsp;<br /><br />&ldquo;What the FUCK are you doing to my friend?!&rdquo;<br /><br />Ok, that definitely wasn&rsquo;t a mirage , he thought just before the cellar filled to the ceiling with rushing water and then projectile vomited everyone and everything back out into the bar. Spinel came to a stop in the middle of the dance floor, slumped onto his side in ankle-deep water like a Magikarp choking for air in a dried up creek as chaos erupted around him. He scrambled underneath an aging wooden table while Richard dislocated one of his captor&rsquo;s jaws with a full-powered left hook. He managed to have the presence of mind to trip the other two for Richard with his bound up ribbons, then quickly succumbed to his exhaustion.<br /><br />There&rsquo;s a couple things you don&rsquo;t ever wanna do in any city&rsquo;s workers&rsquo; quarter: you don&rsquo;t mess with a man&rsquo;s money, you don&rsquo;t mess with his friends and family, and you don&rsquo;t interrupt him when he&rsquo;s on a bender. Almost all the patrons, all at once, had their drinks dashed across the floor and mixed into a semi-alcoholic quagmire. Pretty soon after that Emilio, Richard, Vaporeon, Machoke, and Incineroar joined into an all out brawl with the gangsters, the patrons, and their Pokemon, needing to rescue each other again and again as they tried crawling their way up the stairs and out onto the street.<br /><br />The front of the bar burst into a steaming, fiery, shimmering mess of multicolor energies and the shouts of drunken men.&nbsp;<br /><br />Spinel woke up on a little stretcher with Jenny sirens blaring, red and blue lights blinding him again and again as they rotated on the tops of their black trucks. The three who nearly dragged him back to his old life were bound up in cuffs on the ground, being beaten senseless with batons as part of what Spinel was sure was some punishment mandated by some Royal Decree at some point. Emilio was hunched over the scrambler, dissecting it, poking its insides like a maddened scientist. Richard was shoulder to shoulder with five bar goers, slapping backs with hysterical brotherly laughter, wringing nasty fluids from his shirt, his left hand bound up in a hasty blood stained splint. The faces of everyone had been chipped, bruised, and reddened from the fight, but filled with unfathomable joy.&nbsp;<br /><br />Richard noticed Spinel&rsquo;s head lifting up and jumped to his side. &ldquo;Hey, bud. You know those guys?&rdquo; he asked, pointing to the men slowly being turned into pudding packets on the pavement.<br /><br />Spinel looked around mareepishly, then his eyes fell to the ground with a sad nod. &ldquo;{Yeah&hellip;}&rdquo;<br /><br />&ldquo;Huh, well, fuck those guys and everyone they grabass with. We got yer back, y&rsquo;hear?&rdquo; He picked Spinel up, alarming the teenaged Joy quietly protesting him doing so, and slung him over his shoulder in a mighty hug. Spinel could smell the crusty patches of blood and sweat on Richard&rsquo;s face, and could feel his heart still pumping with adrenaline through his neck.. &ldquo;Thanks for a great time, lil guy.&rdquo;<br /><br />That settled it, then and there. If there was any human man worth the risk of getting pressed into state service for, it was him.<br /><br />Forced by his own excitement to wake before Ho-Oh had a chance to drag the sun across the sky, Spinel leapt from the road over the fence of a cute little cottage with a cone of white wrapping paper in one of his ribbons dashing into their flower garden like a wild Scorbunny. He plucked a wiry bundle of white trumpet shaped flowers with long, yellow stamen and carefully arranged them in the cone. &ldquo;{Honeysuckle, for my pure, endless, devoted affection.}&rdquo;<br /><br />He bolted back out into the streets, trying to remember the places where all his favorite flowers bloomed. He scrambled up onto a baker&rsquo;s windowsill and stealthily plucked plumes of adorable blue periwinkles. &ldquo;{I know this is sudden, we&rsquo;ve only just met.}&rdquo;<br /><br />Like a robber avoiding the cops during a string of robberies in the same town, he dashed from tile roof to tile roof, leaping into a well-to-do merchant&rsquo;s yard. Shouts and curses from several women in unwashed rags out in the morning beating rugs on lines caught him by surprise as he greedily plucked seven long stemmed rosy pink buttercups with centers of glowing yellow petals. &ldquo;{You are so full of charm, radiant like the sun, gentle as the wind.}&rdquo;<br /><br />He had a lovely arrangement of flowers now, matching his own soft pink, white, and blue coloration. But it was missing the supporting plumage. His message needed something more, something that truly matched how he felt. It came to him finally and he scolded himself as he immediately decided to follow through with his terrible plan. The royal garden apiaries had species of flowers that grew all over the world, and meant many things. One thing was on his mind, and he knew for a fact it grew just over the spiked, wrought iron fences keeping them from the avaricious hands of lovestruck schoolchildren. Unlike those children, though, he reached his bruised tendrils through the bars, taking care to wait for the gardeners to wander off before snatching up fluffy, golden tufts of Yellow Acacia to surround the rest of the bouquet. &ldquo;{I am your secret lover.}&rdquo;&nbsp;<br /><br />He picked one final flower, a single bloody red Carnation, and stuck it at the top of his arrangement. &ldquo;{...and my heart aches for you.}&rdquo;<br /><br />Nobody would&rsquo;ve batted an eye at a Sylveon wandering the town with a bouquet of flowers in hand; that was about as suspicious a Tauros chewing grass, but it was a spectacle to those who recognized him and got to see the little Eeveelution in such energetic, happy spirits. Folks waved at him and he whistled back, some of them saying they&rsquo;d heard the news about the bar flooding, others scolding him gently for taking strangers out of the visitor&rsquo;s ring. He could barely hear any of them over the sound of hope reverberating around in his skull.<br /><br />Before the room service carts were due to arrive, Spinel waited around the corner and snuck a do not disturb sign on the outside of Richard&rsquo;s door handle. He stole a quadruped service uniform from the hotel laundry, one of the female ones with a little black skirt, sprayed himself with a fragrant, floral cologne, and then followed the service cart all the way back to Richard&#039;s suite. Room service was always left at the door if there was a no disturb sign out, and sure enough, there was a silver platter with a shimmering dome covering his meal, ready for Spinel to make his move.<br /><br />He cleared his throat, adjusted the uniform, suddenly realized it was weird and slutty, tore the thing off, threw it into the garbage, then brushed his fur clean and smelled his own breath before gently knocking on the door.<br /><br />Richard answered right away, door flying open with reckless abandon, and the sounds of workout tape music could be heard behind him. He had no shirt and had been doing sit ups in baggy Flamigo pajama pants. Spinel had to stop himself from gawking at his exposed ripped abs and instead chose to shyly offer up the platter with the bouquet hidden behind him.<br /><br />&ldquo;Whoah! Morning, buddy. You&rsquo;re way too nice to me, y&rsquo;know? Come on in, I&rsquo;m not gonna eat all this myself.&rdquo; The hotel medical staff had changed out the bandages on Richard&rsquo;s hand, but it was still bound up like a boxing glove. &ldquo;Was just thinking of what I was gonna do to try to get at that Valorie gal. Can&rsquo;t sleep at all just thinking about it. You&rsquo;re friends with her, you got any ideas?&rdquo;<br /><br />Spinel shut the door behind him and joined Richard for breakfast. There was a good chance doing what he was about to do would get him into enough trouble he would end up in the military shoveling waste slop into Poke Diesel engines until his body stopped moving. He waited a good long while before deciding to do this thing, savoring the last few moments where they were still guaranteed to be friends. He pulled apart a muffin, nibbling on it and sipping on his flask for courage. &ldquo;{Hey, I know you can&rsquo;t understand me, but I need to tell you something.}&rdquo; Spinel mused, hoping he&rsquo;d get some sorta response from his tone of voice.<br /><br />Richard swallowed a mouthful of bacon and sausage links, dropping a handful that was in line to be devoured. &ldquo;Mrrf, srry. Ahem. Sorry bud, but I don&rsquo;t get -&rdquo;<br /><br />Spinel hushed him with a gentle touch of the lips with one of his ribbons. He handed Richard the bundle of flowers he&rsquo;d made that morning, along with a hand penned card written with gorgeous calligraphy. &ldquo;To the most entrancing one I&rsquo;ve ever met, my dearest love. Will you be mine?&rdquo; the card read, decorated with intricate, hand drawn hearts and wildflowers in rosy red ink.<br /><br />Spinel&rsquo;s heart went from burning, to warm and fuzzy, to icy cold as Richard&rsquo;s eyes glanced back and forth between him and the message for a full minute in complete silence.<br /><br />&ldquo;Buddy, this&hellip; Is this?&rdquo; Richard asked, face turning beet red with embarrassment.<br /><br />Spinel turned with a shy little giggle and forced a blush on his own cheeks, a skill he&rsquo;d acquired in his old work. A cute charm worked just as well on a human if you were subtle about it. &ldquo;Syyyllllveeeeooon,&rdquo; he cooed quietly, with no real meaning in his Pokespeech other than trying to seem as sincere and alluring as possible.&nbsp;<br /><br />&ldquo;I, oh gosh. Buddy, I&hellip;&rdquo; Richard sat down, looked at the flowers, played with the petals of the carnation between his thumb and forefinger.&nbsp;<br /><br />Spinel walked up to Richard and rubbed his whole body, head to haunches, against his legs with a soothing pur. &ldquo;{Please say yes,}&rdquo; he uttered to himself. &ldquo;{Pleeeeeease say yes.}&rdquo;<br /><br />Richard&rsquo;s head snapped up with a manic, enthusiastic smile. &ldquo;My &lsquo;mon, this is just what I needed.&rdquo;<br /><br />Spinel&rsquo;s head tilted in surprise, a ribbon scratching his cheek in confusion. &ldquo;{Huh?}&rdquo;<br /><br />&ldquo;Y&rsquo;know, I never got why my &lsquo;cuz and Em spend so much time with their &lsquo;mon after hours. I get it now!&rdquo; Richard chuckled softly, hustled over to the bed where all of his things had migrated like a flock of Swanna &lsquo;round a community pond, and kicked his pants off to the side on the floor. &ldquo;Man, you have no idea how much I&rsquo;ve been needing something like this.&rdquo;<br /><br />Spinel&rsquo;s heart started pounding as he got a good look at the guy&rsquo;s perfectly sculpted ass, illuminated like a star player of a broadway play by the morning light shining in from the third-storey window. He started fanning himself, checked the locks on the door, and started plotting his domination of Richard&rsquo;s flesh as he ambled forward like a newborn Deerling. Oh, Arceus, was this happening right now ? Even with how straightforward Spinel was being he hadn&rsquo;t expected such a fiery reaction to his declaration of love, not that he was going to complain as he got his tendrils all over that smooth, strong, muscular body of his. His chest practically shook with anticipation and his ribbons curled in excitement for all the ways he was going to wrap him up, snuggle into his chest, and&hellip;<br /><br />Richard laid the flowers onto the bed and started getting dressed. &ldquo;I was so stupid, hahaha.&rdquo;<br /><br />Spinel realized something was wrong and quickly sat around the corner of the bed, trying to hide the raging erection that had slithered past the slit in his fur between his hind legs. He watched and listened, knowing that nothing he said would have made any sense to this poor man, and that writing anything down would have incriminated them both.<br /><br />Rich threw on a pair of sweatpants, a sweatshirt, donned a pair of holey socks, then slipped on his streetworn sneakers. &ldquo;I came on way too strong. You Kalos folk love the classics, that&rsquo;s what you&rsquo;re all about, right? Yeah, this is exactly what I need to start over with Val.&rdquo; He hastily tried to clip his Pokeball rack on, but it slipped off and fell into his suitcase as he darted away.<br /><br />Spinel&rsquo;s swagger deflated like a two-day-old birthday balloon. &ldquo;{But&hellip;}&rdquo;<br /><br />Richard ruffled the &lsquo;mon&rsquo;s head, totally oblivious to Spinel&rsquo;s look of pure, unfettered dumbfoundedness. &ldquo;C&rsquo;mon, buddy. Let&rsquo;s go together,&rdquo; he huffed as he jogged in place, bouquet and letter in his sweaty clutches. &ldquo;I&rsquo;m gonna trust you with this stuff from now on, if you don&rsquo;t mind. Who best to ask about love than a Sylveon, right? Gods, I shoulda thought of this sooner.&rdquo;<br /><br />&ldquo;{Y-yeah&hellip; I guess a stroll sounds&hellip; good&hellip;}&rdquo; Spinel replied with a forced, hollow enthusiasm, and scampered off behind Richard down the hall.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />Valorie meticulously built seven little stacks of gold and silver coins atop a smooth plastic, neon red countertop that reminded her of the little wagons everyone scrimped and saved for as a kid. Beside them was a tiny book of hand-torn coupon clippings from a myriad of modest sources.<br /><br />A middle aged Joy fidgeted with her pink and white service dress as her very intense, poorly groomed customer meticulously plucked the tender from a green canvas waist-satchel, scribbled numbers down into a grimy little notepad, and then placed them down with audible clinks. Her eyes shifted to the line of frustrated nobility and peasantry that wound around the lobby.<br /><br />Clink<br /><br />Clink<br /><br />Val grumbled something to herself, scratched out a note, and removed one of the coins, replacing it with one of a smaller denomination.&nbsp;<br /><br />Joy chuckled weakly and cleared her throat, &ldquo;Miss?&rdquo; she asked, with a faint quiver in her voice.<br /><br />&ldquo;Hmm?&rdquo; Val grunted, peering up from her accounts.<br /><br />Joy beamed with what appeared to be pure, genuine delight, a skill she&rsquo;d gained after decades of service at this one singular job, as she held out a gracious palm. &ldquo;I&rsquo;d be happy to count that out for you.&rdquo;<br /><br />Val shook her head and brushed the clone&rsquo;s porcelain skinned fingers away. &ldquo;Not a chance.&rdquo;<br /><br />Clink<br /><br />Scribble<br /><br />Clink<br /><br />The corner of Val&rsquo;s mouth scrunched up into a pained grimace, then she brushed a strand of hair from her eyes and huffed in frustration. &ldquo;No, that&rsquo;s not right, Joy. Could you please do it old school?&rdquo;<br /><br />The crowd behind her erupted into tired sounds of displeasure and rolling heads.<br /><br />One of Joy&rsquo;s bright blue eyes twitched a little, her cool, steely servitude starting to give way to the boiling exhaustion she felt. She collected bulk medicines from the back, took the expensive ones out of the case, dealt with the overly detailed questions, fought the doctor for approval for a few of them on this lady&rsquo;s behalf, and grinned for the pleasure to serve. She did this every single minute, of every single hour, of every single day of her simple existence. The computer did the math. Yeah, she could whip out the abacus and scratch lines in the sand like a caveperson, but-<br /><br />&ldquo;Of course, one moment, Miss!&rdquo; Joy dumped all the medicines off the counter into a waffled polymer basket and bounded off with bona fide happiness towards the back room. &ldquo;Doctor! This customer would like a hard count.&rdquo;<br /><br />The Doctor, a middle aged&nbsp; Kantonian lady with harsh washboard wrinkles squinted and shook her head. &ldquo;Policy, Number Seventy-Four. What does policy say?&rdquo;<br /><br />Joy tilted her head. &ldquo;Which one, Doctor? There&rsquo;s so many.&rdquo;<br /><br />She scowled and stood from her office chair, gaining a whopping six intimidating inches of height. &ldquo;Deflect, Direct, and Collect.&rdquo;<br /><br />Joy chuckled and shrugged. &ldquo;Ah, my mistake. I was thinkingggg&hellip; Pokemed, Bluebook, Chapter four: &lsquo;All requests of a manual count for a total order exceeding fifty-thousand pokedollars will be honored by supervisory staff review. Mandated under the decision of Dahara v. Sylph Co.&rdquo;<br /><br />The utterly joyless woman shoved her way past, tiny black high heels stabbing the linoleum. Well, at least she wished she was Joyless. She would have traded her insolent code cuddling clone for three handsome, underpaid gym jockeys any day.<br /><br />&ldquo;Your total is eighty thousand, fifty five,&rdquo; she blurted out.<br /><br />Valorie rocked with an impatient sigh that rolled down the line of shoppers like a wave. &ldquo;No it&#039;s not, Lady. Drink some coffee and count again, aight? Pretty sure it&rsquo;s&hellip; ah&hellip;&rdquo; she squinted at the mess of Torchic scratches in her notebook. &ldquo;Seven two zero two five.&rdquo;<br /><br />Without any warning the turbulent old woman clicked to a halt, then she abruptly made an about-face, yanked the basket out of Joy Number Seventy Four&rsquo;s clutches, and ran her fingers through boxes, bottles, and blister packs like she was carefully counting documents in a filing cabinet drawer. Finally, she squinted through her tiny rectangular glasses at the coupons at the bottom of the basket strewn like autumn leaves tracked in from the rain.<br /><br />&ldquo;What was the register total?&rdquo; She huffed, red in the face.<br /><br />Joy was stunned at the visceral, furious reaction, and at the fastest hand count ever demonstrated by man. &ldquo;Eighty-three-thousand, five-hundred and one Pokedollars. Taxes and duties included.&rdquo;<br /><br />The doctor shook her head, suddenly sober with humility, allowing her stern composure to recrystalize. &ldquo;The &lsquo;Five-and-a-Full-Heal Deal&rsquo; isn&rsquo;t coded right this week. Accurate total is Seventy-two-thousand, twenty-five.&rdquo; She tore a little pink coupon free from a roll hanging on the wall. &ldquo;And 500 off her next visit.&rdquo;<br /><br />Joy bounced back to life. Finally, normalcy had been restored. She started wrapping the delicate items up and then punched in the price override code the Doctor had accidentally disclosed to her on a random hangover day. &ldquo;Our apologies, Miss. There was a miscode for some of your items. As a token of our apologies, feel free to use this on your next purchase.&rdquo;<br /><br />Valorie held the all&ndash;together rather nicely arranged paper shopping bag, printed with a smiling Pichu in a nurse&rsquo;s hat, surprised. She peered at the voucher and her face screwed up in confusion. &ldquo;Th&hellip;Thanks, Joy.&rdquo; Shit, when was the next time she was gonna step foot in this place? She swiped up a roll of double strength cinnamon pepper poppers from a candy rack, then shoved the voucher towards Joy as she raised the candies up in defiance. &ldquo;I&rsquo;m taking this!&rdquo;<br /><br />Joy chuckled. &ldquo;My pleasure. Have a good day!&rdquo; Then, without Valorie present, she rang up the candy, scanned the coupon, and gasped a little at the sudden red, blinking letters reading, &lsquo;Purchaser not Present.&rsquo; She typed in the override again, sure that her manager wouldn&rsquo;t want to be bothered with such a petty issue.<br /><br />Contrary to that belief, the Doctor, having observed Valorie&rsquo;s microscopic slip-up, waited five whole minutes before she clawed at the yellowing plastic dialpad of her desk phone with long, glossy black fingernails. &ldquo;Hello. Yes, this is Doctor Ito. Medmart, yes... I&rsquo;d like to report a crime.&rdquo;<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />Prince Meyer had finally shaken off his retinue. It was the second day of their grand tournament, and also daddy day! He brushed his beard with a silver comb as he marveled at the young adults his children had matured into. Yes, the two of them had wound up into a rich spaghetti&rsquo;s swirl of strategies and game plans even after only seeing the first of many glorious destructive ballets. He was all too happy to sit aside with his spiked Afogato and listen as they rehearsed their own parts in the show.&nbsp;<br /><br />A beautiful morning filled with the sights and sounds of pricelessness, soiled only by the faint wailing of police sirens deep within the cityscape.&nbsp;<br /><br />&ldquo;Hau&rsquo;s tidal rush is going to be a big problem. I propose an item based solution!&rdquo; Clemont said, fist raised in preemptive triumph. &ldquo;Two of our Pokemon aren&rsquo;t equipped up to league allowances, after all.&rdquo;<br /><br />His younger, less energetic sibling shook her head and bit into a cured-spoink cr&ecirc;pe. &ldquo;Nuuu, you lose points that way if we run out of time! Wasn&rsquo;t that one of your Brilliant strategies, egghead?&rdquo;<br /><br />Ah yes, the sounds of the players addressing each other&rsquo;s makeup and dress. Chaotic? Yes, but that is the way a roiling pot of creatives should be!&nbsp;<br /><br />Speaking of players&hellip;<br /><br />&ldquo;Careful, you two. The antagonists arrive, stage left.&rdquo;<br /><br />The two of them slapped their faces shut with both palms as they saw Richard jogging in the street with an intricately arranged assortment of freshly plucked flowers, shaken bare like a witch&rsquo;s broom. He reeked of sweat, gray sweatshirt stained at the pits, dragging a pink and white shadow in his wake.<br /><br />Meyer squinted. &ldquo;Oh, Courage has found his footing at the precipice once more?&rdquo;<br /><br />Bonnie&rsquo;s head tilted in confusion as her brother frowned in frustration. &ldquo;Huh?&rdquo;<br /><br />Beep beep beep beep.&nbsp;<br /><br />Meyer reached into his cloak, hiding a little repurposed &lsquo;Monogatchi toy chassis with an LCD screen in the shape of a Blaziken head.&nbsp;<br /><br />Clemont started scarfing down his grapes and pickled pecha, chewing hard with a fork clutched tightly in one hand.<br /><br />The little screen showed a picture of Valorie. No&hellip; Seaman specialist, first class, Valorie de Blanc. Wanted for desertion, absconsion with navy materiel, assault of a superior officer&hellip; and shoplifting.<br /><br />&ldquo;A de Blanc?&rdquo; Meyer whispered to himself as his attention dialed in like a critic ready to scathe the performing troupe in the next morning&rsquo;s print. &ldquo;Scandalous,&rdquo; he said as he only then began to realize those police sirens were getting louder.<br /><br />Then, like a curtain lifting before his eyes, Valorie waltzed onto the stage counting a handful of shiny copper coins in her palm. The crowds of the city square seemed to move aside, glossing his blessed eyes over with the scene he had hoped to witness all along. &ldquo;A long, drawn out derivative of a timeless classic, Lord Enamorous,&rdquo; he muttered, sipping his coffee with a smirk. &ldquo;Let&rsquo;s see the end, then.&rdquo;<br /><br />Bonnie seemed happy at her father&rsquo;s calm demeanor. What a pleasant day this had turned out to be. Oh, was that guy gonna propose? How adorable! That must be what father is so excited about. No better place and no better time to show the woman of your dreams your deepest desires then in the Golden Ring of Lumiose!<br /><br />Clemont&rsquo;s spine loosened a bit as he squinted at his father&rsquo;s distraction with the gushy monologue that surely was coming. &ldquo;Whew. I was worried there for a minute.&rdquo; A mechanical tendril with a little three-fingered hand pressed a handkerchief to his lips and then retracted into his backpack.&nbsp;<br /><br />Richard fell to one knee onto the rough cobblestone street, clumsily smashing it in the process. The way Devotion had been characterized in this rendition, he fully expected him to jeer and chuckle at Courage&rsquo;s misfortune, but this did not occur. Instead, the tired looking Sylveon reached forward with his tendrils as if to say, &ldquo;oh no!&rdquo;<br /><br />And, perched at the peak of her lair, Passion stood before him with eyes empty of jest.&nbsp;<br /><br />Richard lunged forward with the bouquet like a sword towards a mighty beast, showering her boots in wilting petals. &ldquo;For you, my lady of Kalos!&rdquo; he said, putting his bundled up hand to his chest in a gesture of humility.<br /><br />What a strange composition you have penned, oh Lord!&nbsp;<br /><br />Devotion, seeing his master at the moment of salvation, tears up, a face full of&hellip; sadness? No, anguish! Courage, instead of having gained the strength of his comrades, is a tattered, sweaty mess, throwing himself at Passion&rsquo;s feet like a starving Growlithe begging for a bowl of scraps. And in what distorted place was Prudence hiding?!<br /><br />Valorie&rsquo;s face scrunched up into a paper ball of pity. &ldquo;Dude, you just don&rsquo;t give up, do you?&rdquo;<br /><br />Richard shook his head, panting now that his mind had realized he was finally at rest. &ldquo;I never give up.&rdquo; He stood, shaking the pain out of his knee, and moved closer with the flowers. He tried his absolute best to remember the notes Sylveon had written on the paper he accidentally dropped a mile back on the road.&nbsp; &ldquo;You&hellip; You are my greatest, dearest, entrancing love!&rdquo;<br /><br />Meyer and his son both wished for a snack bucket to puke into.<br /><br />Bonnie held her hands together with saucer-wide eyes. &ldquo;Aaaaawwww!&rdquo;<br /><br />Valorie turned her head away from him, unable to even look at his tragic display. &ldquo;Seriously, forget it, I&rsquo;m already taken.&rdquo;<br /><br />Meyer&rsquo;s jaw fell to the floor. Was the programme misprinted? Was he actually watching the Tragedy of Two Homes all along?<br /><br />Richard looked at the flowers, tossed them aside, and started barking at Valorie like she was an opponent across the arena, index finger pointed towards her. &ldquo;I don&rsquo;t care! You&rsquo;re the most amazing woman I&rsquo;ve ever met, and I&rsquo;ll stop at nothing until I&rsquo;ve caught you all for myself. I&rsquo;ll be everything you could ever want.&rdquo; He lurched forward and caught her palms together in his hands. &ldquo;I promise.&rdquo;<br /><br />Her eyes glanced down at the space right where a tail might have gone above his ass, brushed the top of his head where some big fluffy ears might have played against her skin, ran her thumb over his dull, harmless fingernails. &ldquo;No, you won&#039;t &hellip;. and you never will.&rdquo;<br /><br />She pushed him to his ass and marched away, wedging herself through a gap in the crowd with the bag of medicines slung over her shoulder. &ldquo;Just forget I ever existed, rich boy.&rdquo;<br /><br />Bonnie had fallen to her knees, eyes wet with devastated tears. Clemont teetered over in his chair, laughing hysterically at the upset. The crowd didn&rsquo;t react in any discernible way.&nbsp;<br /><br />But all Meyer could feel in his heart was rage! What a horrible farce this was! No, it had to be a test, he was sure of it now. He reached into his cloak, clutched the image of Valorie on the communications gadget, staring at it with brutal intensity.<br /><br />Clemont recognized the dour look on his father&rsquo;s face immediately and he tugged at his cloak in distress. &ldquo;No, Dad! You promised! You promised you&rsquo;d be there with us at the Tournament.&rdquo;<br /><br />Meyer&rsquo;s face, like that of an actor under warm tinted lights, grinned and twirled his cape as he walked away. &ldquo;Do no despair, my most beloved son. Like the titular hero of the Monomyth, I always arrive when I am needed most; save my seat&hellip;. Carlisle!&rdquo;<br /><br />From a different table, a man with a pudgy nose in a fine three piece suit came out from his hiding place behind a massive sheet of newspaper, sipping an exact copy of Meyer&rsquo;s drink of choice. &ldquo;Of course, sir. Come along, young masters. I believe we&rsquo;re scheduled to visit the aquarium next. How delightful.&rdquo;<br /><br />Bonnie and Clemont followed Carlisle like a pair of stormclouds, leaving a stack of golden coins on the table for the half finished food. Spinel had wrapped his tendrils around Richard&rsquo;s shoulders, his little head resting on Richard&rsquo;s hunched back, rubbing his shoulders in an attempt to soothe his pain. Through those tendril&rsquo;s, though, he didn&rsquo;t feel any pain at all. In fact, what he felt was some strange kind of morbid joviality.<br /><br />Richard whipped around and wrapped his arms around Spinel, who squeaked at the sudden embrace. &ldquo;Nah, nah buddy. Gramps always said&hellip; If ya stop when it starts hurtin&rsquo;, ya bled out for nothin&#039;.&rdquo;<br /><br />Spinel&rsquo;s eyes watered and he nuzzled Richard&rsquo;s face. &ldquo;{Right, no sense in stopping now, huh.}&rdquo;<br /><br />Meyer smiled as he disappeared into the darkness of the alley, pulling a red mask over his head. &ldquo;Break a leg, Courage.&rdquo;<br /><br />The siren call of the police trucks finally reached a crescendo as people dashed out of the way to dodge their massive ashen tires. Three trucks with two Jennies each kicked the doors wide open, looking regal and commanding in the white and gold uniforms of the elite inner city task forces.&nbsp;<br /><br />&ldquo;Madame Valerie de Blanc, for your crimes against the Crown and its people, you are under arrest!&rdquo; yelled the oldest of the six Jennies, proudly decorated with glistening golden epaulets over her shoulders and an intricately woven, crimson aiguillette dangling down her chest.<br /><br />Twelve white leather gloves gripped six menacing, modern submachine guns trained on Valerie&rsquo;s center of mass. And as her own weary fingers trembled in place, unsure of which desperate move would claw her way to freedom, Val steeled herself for the worst of all outcomes with deep, heavy breathing.<br /><br />Richard stood defiantly, chest puffing in the face of the police. &ldquo;Hey, she hasn&rsquo;t done anything&ndash;&rdquo;<br /><br />Spinel&rsquo;s ribbons wrapped around Richard&#039;s mouth and his limbs, frantically trying to keep him from getting them both shot. &ldquo;{Shut up!}&rdquo;<br /><br />A circle of bodies had traced itself around the scene. Gawking, slack jawed faces eyed the situation while emotionally charged bystanders jeered at the police on impulse despite the truth.&nbsp;<br /><br />One of the officer&rsquo;s guns snapped to Richard as he was prying Spinel&rsquo;s ribbons away from his mouth. &ldquo;Remain where you are, Civilian.&rdquo;<br /><br />Rich pulled Spinel off his face like a tightly wound scarf, &ldquo;Lay off it, she can have our lawyers.&rdquo;<br /><br />Valerie&rsquo;s eyes darted back and forth between Richard and the Officers. &ldquo;Shut up.&rdquo;<br /><br />&ldquo;Let them take you, I&rsquo;ll make sure you get out of&ndash;&rdquo;<br /><br />&ldquo;Shut! Up!&rdquo; Val shouted, then flinched as several of the officers jumped at her sudden animation.<br /><br />Spinel squealed in terror as Richard&rsquo;s powerful legs dragged them both towards the officer trained on him. &ldquo;Listen, lady. We can work this out,&rdquo; he said, palms out, signaling his good intentions.<br /><br />&ldquo;Get back!&rdquo; Jenny kicked him square in the chest, launching him up into the air, and rolled him across the cobblestones ten feet back. Richard&rsquo;s head rang with her command, like his head had been left inside a struck bell.&nbsp;<br /><br />He couldn&rsquo;t move, he couldn&rsquo;t speak, he was pretty sure something came unset in his already injured fist. Somewhere between Spinel trying to bind him up into a pink straight-jacket for his own safety and the unbelievable force of the Jenny Unit&rsquo;s boot on his chest he lost every ounce of his previously endless supply of macho virility.&nbsp;<br /><br />&ldquo;Hands behind your head and knees on the ground. Now!&rdquo; the Sergeant barked to Valerie. &ldquo;Nice and easy, nobody else needs to get hurt, de Blanc.&rdquo;<br /><br />Valerie&rsquo;s hands fidgeted, slowly, tingling from the elbows down. Her fingers clutched and crumpled the Pokemart bag, her mind frantically obsessing over the thought of this most precious kind of cargo wasting away in an evidence bin while a tree stump full of dying infants needed it most.<br /><br />Both hands reached behind her head, sweaty palms threatening to grip the worn maplewood stock of the faithful weapon slung to her back. It&rsquo;s said about guns and lovers , she thought, only one of them was guaranteed to be there &lsquo;til death do us part.&rsquo;<br /><br />Nah, she had to give her Fenny credit. He would have stupidly stood his ground and died with her too, no matter how much she begged for him to run. He sure did jam up a lot more than the rifle, though.<br /><br />Val got down to her knees and slowly placed the package in front of her. &ldquo;This isn&rsquo;t mine, I stole it from them,&rdquo; she said, pointing to Spinel and Richard. &ldquo;If I give it back, can I get that offense scratched off?&rdquo;<br /><br />One officer nodded, then gestured with her weapon. &ldquo;Push it away with your foot.&rdquo;<br /><br />Val winked at Spinel as she took in one final breath, kicking the bag towards them. &ldquo;{You make sure Fenny gets this, y&rsquo;hear?}&rdquo;<br /><br />Spinel&rsquo;s eyes widened in horror as he watched the color leave Valorie&rsquo;s face. &ldquo;{Val, don&rsquo;t!}&rdquo;<br /><br />Suddenly, everyone&rsquo;s tensions spun to a wild freefall and evaporated into a haze of confusion as all the loudspeakers of the city square began playing a familiar, trumpeting fanfare. The crowd started murmuring, then chittered with pockets of excitement.<br /><br />&ldquo;Thank goodness!&rdquo;<br /><br />&ldquo;It&#039;s him!&rdquo;<br /><br />&ldquo;Surely that&rsquo;s his call!&rdquo;<br /><br />&ldquo;Bite a switch, swine, haha!&rdquo;<br /><br />&ldquo;The Mask will fix this!&rdquo;<br /><br />Six white gloved hands left their weapons and smacked the faces of six tired, overworked civil servants. &ldquo;Oh for the love of Arceus, not this!&rdquo; Sergeant Jenny groaned as fireworks popped out of nowhere, creating a dense screen of multicolor smoke and confetti that surrounded the restaurant.<br /><br />Valerie&rsquo;s arms drooped to her sides as the truckload of Adrenaline rampaging through her body suddenly had absolutely nothing to do. &ldquo;What the fuck?&rdquo;<br /><br />At the top of the entrance to the cafe stood a tall, proud Blaziken with a vermilion cape. To his side was a man in a colorful, armored costume matching his Pokemon&rsquo;s natural colors, wearing a menacing Blaziken themed mask which hid the man&rsquo;s identity from his foes. Journalists and camera crews were trying to swim their way through the sea of onlookers, happy to pad their quota with an appearance of the city&rsquo;s legendary do-gooder. He laughed like he just heard the punchline to a magnificent joke whispered in his ear and pointed a black-gloved finger towards the officers as the crowd exploded with applause.<br /><br />&ldquo;Excellent work, Officers, but your work here is done! I shall deal with this miscreant.&rdquo; The Mask announced.<br /><br />Sergeant Jenny shrugged and chuckled, waving it off like it was nothing. &ldquo;Ahaaa, Blaziken Maaask. No need to get yourself involved. I&rsquo;m sure there&rsquo;s so many other things your capable hands should be tackling right now. Much appreciated, though.&rdquo;<br /><br />Richard peeled his head free again. &ldquo;HELP! She didn&rsquo;t do anything wrong, I swear!&rdquo;<br /><br />Spinel mummified Richard&rsquo;s head for a third time.<br /><br />&ldquo;I know this Woman&rsquo;s crimes, and as this city&rsquo;s Ultimate Arbiter of Justice I absolve her of all of them,&rdquo; The Mask said, and the crowd roared at the declaration.<br /><br />The Jennies stood their ground. &ldquo;That would be our pleasure, My Lord. But your powers are limited here. You see, she has committed horrible atrocities against Kalos as a whole! I&rsquo;m afraid she must be taken in. We can scratch off the shoplifting charge, though!&rdquo; The crowd hissed and booed as bits of food, empty bottles, and cigarette butts rained upon them.<br /><br />He laughed again. &ldquo;Oh, what a horrid predicament. My goodness, isn&rsquo;t there a member of the royal family, or one of their MOST ESTEEMED GUESTS who could represent her in a duel for her honor?&rdquo;<br /><br />Richard bit Spinel&rsquo;s ribbons and they unfurled. &ldquo;I CAN! I will duel for my Lady&rsquo;s honor!&rdquo;<br /><br />Finally the situation managed to decompile in Val&rsquo;s skull as she grabbed for the absolutely ridiculous lifeline being extended to her. She mentally brushed up on manners of speech she hadn&rsquo;t used in over a decade, put her hands up, clasped them together, and bowed towards Richard. &ldquo;Oh, the Chivalry! Finest of men, will you duel on my behalf and redeem me of my wrongdoings?&rdquo; The pride she swallowed went down like a mouthful of hot gravel.<br /><br />Spinel hung from Richard like a web of torn up tinsel hanging from a tree as Richard raised his bandaged fist up in the air like a knight ready to vanquish his foes. &ldquo;For your love, Val, I would do anything! I shall duel you, Jennies!&rdquo;<br /><br />The Mask nodded with appeasement. &ldquo;Very well, courageous man! Choose your contest!&rdquo;<br /><br />Richard was inflated again with hope and confidence. &ldquo;I challenge you, Jennies&hellip; to a League regulation Pokemon Battle!&rdquo;<br /><br />&ldquo;So it shall be. Officers, prepare yourselves and select your challenger!&rdquo; The Mask commanded, then stood with arms crossed, mirroring his Pokemon partner&rsquo;s stance.<br /><br />The Jennies huddled together in confusion. &ldquo;Who? What? How?&rdquo;<br /><br />&ldquo;You&rsquo;re supposed to have up to six &lsquo;mon, you do it like on the Tele, ma&rsquo;am!&rdquo;<br /><br />&ldquo;You should do it, Sarge! Only one of us can.&rdquo;<br /><br />&ldquo;Why me?!&rdquo;<br /><br />The smallest of the Jennies saluted. &ldquo;You&rsquo;re the oldest and the wisest, and we all trust you with our lives. You can have my Arcanine!&rdquo;<br /><br />The other four reached for their service balls and handed them off to their superior officer.&nbsp;<br /><br />&ldquo;Let&rsquo;s do it, squad!&rdquo; Sergeant Jenny said, hands on her hips with pride, ready with a full team.<br /><br />Richard reached for his belt and found nothing but the exposed waistband of his boxer shorts. &ldquo;Shit!&rdquo;<br /><br />Spinel saw the panic and removed himself from Richard&rsquo;s body, brushed his fur straight, and then stood by his man&rsquo;s side. He sighed, realizing that what he was about to do was absolute idiocy, but knowing for sure that he would have hated himself for the rest of his life if he decided on doing anything else. &ldquo;{I&rsquo;ll fight for you, Richard.}&rdquo;<br /><br />Richard&rsquo;s arms pumped with Excitement. &ldquo;Aw yeah! Don&rsquo;t you worry, Sylveon. I&rsquo;ve trained with all sorts of fairy types, we&rsquo;re gonna destroy these fools.&rdquo;<br /><br />Six full sized, fully evolved Pokemon appeared in front of the Sergeant; massive Arcanines in bulky assault vests looking unnerved as they took in the riotous scene around them.&nbsp;<br /><br />Spinel pushed his fear aside and stepped forward with his chest puffed out. &ldquo;{Oh gods&hellip;}&rdquo;<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />Meanwhile, on the edge of this debacle, Emilio and Vaporeon were exploring the city after having been up for Pokespeech lessons with Val at the ass-crack-dawn. Having seen the crowd forming in real time, he decided not to involve himself in whatever was going on, full stop. He heard police sirens, and the last time cops were involved he almost got shot. So, to make his lover not have to worry about his safety again, they stopped into a little bakery that still had people around to take his money and sat themselves down for a quiet breakfast of croissants and coffee as the drama blew over. The lack of any prying eyes even offered him the luxury of a stolen kiss or two with the beauty wrapped around his shoulders as they waited for their food.<br /><br />Vaporeon hissed and Emil jumped as a news-camera was thrust in his face. &ldquo;You! You&rsquo;re Emilio Mallison, right?&rdquo;<br /><br />Emil stuttered and answered out of instinct. &ldquo;Y-yeah.&rdquo;<br /><br />&ldquo;Good to meet you, sir! A question, if I may.&rdquo;<br /><br />Emilio had answered a billion questions on camera at this point, in fact he was legally obligated to, if a few more made this guy go away he was happy to do so. &ldquo;Sure, only one, though,&rdquo; he replied, then sipped from his cup.<br /><br />&ldquo;What do you think of your partner battling with the police to save a ruthless, wanted criminal?&rdquo;<br /><br />&ldquo;Pfft! What?!&rdquo; Emil spat, showering the table in dark roast.<br /><br />&ldquo;Yes, it&#039;s happening right now in the city square. Is he normally so reckless?&rdquo;<br /><br />Emil dropped some coins on the counter as Vaporeon shoved the camera away with her tail. &ldquo;That was your one question. I gotta go see a man about a fish, bye.&rdquo;<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/-\\|/<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />&ldquo;Sylveon, I choose you!&rdquo; Richard commanded, and Spinel walked towards the empty, impromptu arena, cheered on by the crowd..<br /><br />&ldquo;Arcanine, I choose you!&rdquo; Jenny ordered.<br /><br />The six canine &lsquo;mon looked around at each other, perplexed, then looked cutely at their commanding officer. &ldquo;Nine?&rdquo;<br /><br />She pointed to the nearest one. &ldquo;You! Ugh, blend me, this is so ridiculous!&rdquo;<br /><br />Spinel&rsquo;s whole existence had been spent doing literally anything other than fighting, he&rsquo;d made every effort to avoid bruises and the uncomfortable feeling of bleeding to death as a matter of habit. So he prepared to follow all of Richard&rsquo;s instructions, hoping beyond hope that one of the many, powerful gods he never made offerings to would shine on him with just one of the many favors they owed him for the difficult life he&rsquo;d led. Of course he wanted Richard to win this, but even more than that he wanted to make it up to Val for saving his life all those years ago. The thought of it steeled his resolve further and he cried out to the Arcanine across the expanse in the bright, musical way he hadn&rsquo;t been compelled to since he evolved.<br /><br />&ldquo;That&#039;s the spirit, buddy!&rdquo; Richard said.<br /><br />The mask raised his palm. &ldquo;Ready?&rdquo;<br /><br />&ldquo;WAIT, Godsdammit wait!&rdquo; Emil yelled, glasses nearly falling from his face as he pulled himself out from the crowd like he was prying himself free from a crack in a cliff face.&nbsp;<br /><br />Richard sighed with relief. &ldquo;Oh, Em! Oh my gods! Did you bring&ndash;&rdquo;<br /><br />Vaporeon jumped off Emil&rsquo;s shoulders and slapped Richard across the face with the fins of her tail as she landed beside him. &ldquo;{Idiot,}&rdquo; she scoffed, then peered over at Spinel standing in front of a hungry, vicious canine. &ldquo;{You lost or something?}&rdquo;<br /><br />Spinel rubbed the back of his head. &ldquo;{Y-Yeah, dunno how I ended up in this mess, but I can&rsquo;t back out now.}&rdquo;<br /><br />Vaporeon shrugged, sat squat beside her trainer, and smiled. &ldquo;{Don&rsquo;t worry, builds character. I&rsquo;ll be here to scrape you up when you run out of steam.}&rdquo;<br /><br />C&#039;est la vie , Spinel thought, brushing the fur of his ears neat and tidy for his time in the spotlight.</span>",
  "pools_count": 1,
  "title": "Forbidden Waters - 16",
  "deleted": "f",
  "public": "t",
  "mimetype": "image/png",
  "pagecount": "1",
  "rating_id": "2",
  "rating_name": "Adult",
  "ratings": [
    {
      "content_tag_id": "3",
      "name": "Violence",
      "description": "Mild violence",
      "rating_id": "1"
    },
    {
      "content_tag_id": "4",
      "name": "Sexual Themes",
      "description": "Erotic imagery, sexual activity or arousal",
      "rating_id": "2"
    }
  ],
  "submission_type_id": "12",
  "type_name": "Writing - Document",
  "guest_block": "f",
  "friends_only": "f",
  "comments_count": "7",
  "views": "256"
}