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MICRO/MACRO THEMES
GORE (AS RELATING TO INSECT DEATH)
AN IMPLIED BAD END?

Okay maybe this is a sign that you shouldn't give me coffee on a work night.

I've been thinking about commissioning a picture along these lines for a while but couldn't exactly settle on how I wanted to portray it. Instead, this is what we get, another warm-up story crafted in an hour and a half.

Yes, I'm aware mites probably don't make sounds. Nor do they probably sound like Tobias from Animorphs, but hey, itty-bitty creatures are weird.", "writing": "Total Party Wipe\nA non-canon short by Cadence Andrysiak\n\n“AAAGH!”\n\nTrevelyan exhaled as he swung his greatsword into the thorax of the encroaching arachnoid. Finely-crafted steel met exoskeleton, resulting in a sickening crunch. Withdrawing his sword, an arrow swiftly plunged true into the breach. A second one followed close behind.\n\n“TSEEEEEEEER!” the arachnid burbled in terminal pain, falling dead onto its side. Yellow ichor spilled from the wound onto the ground, puddling around the knight’s boots.\n\n“Are all quests this messy?” Trevelyan growled, wiping sweat from his brow. That voice wasn’t his. He turned his head, the cloth-armored ranger of the group moving his bow to a comfortable position on his back.\n\n“Well…” Trevelyan replied, Seerus, the group’s ranger, was about to reply before the knight extended an armored hand in an attempt to keep him from stating the obvious.\n\n“Yes, yes, I know that this location is rife with arachnoids, but we’re here to slay each and every one of them.”\n\n“I’m gonna need more arrows.” Seerus reported. “Are any of those reusable?” He remarked, looking at the corpse of their latest quarry.\n\n“You probably should have bothered buying some at the last fletcher shop we were at…” Another voice sounded. Therrin, the group’s thief, spoke matter-of-factly, rushing to catch up to the other two members of the team, breathing heavily from his finished sprint.\n\n“Ah, yes, the very place you got us kicked out of.” Seerus snarked in return.\n\n“We needed more money, so…”\n\n“Did you HAVE to try to get it from the same place I was trying to buy things from?”\n\n“Well he DID look away long enough to-”\n\n“GENTLEMEN!” Trevelyan’s voice thundered. The hedge knight rolled his eyes after the other two focused their gazes on his armored form. “I know we haven’t exactly gotten off to a good start, but if we accomplish this quest, perhaps that will convince the guards to leave us be. Perhaps we might even be paid well for services rendered.”\n\n“More than what I could make by stealing?” Therrin chimed in with a rising intonation\n\n“Yes, even that.” Trevelyan replied. “Though next time, try to get here quicker, Therrin. Your daggers could easily find gaps in their exoskeletons to exploit.”\n\n“That’s not the only one of those out here, is it?” Seerus shivered. He longed for the fibrous forests he was used to navigating, versus this expansive plain that stretched beyond the horizon.\n\n“Far from it, didn’t you pay attention when we got this quest?” Therrin replied with a snarky tone. “I may prefer the darkness of The Walls, but this beats rotting in a dungeon for failing to get away from another attempted heist unscathed.”\n\n“You call opening a chest a heist-”\n\n“Gentlemen!” Trevelyan raised a steel-clad boot and slammed it down, splashing some of the deceased creature’s ichor further up his greaves. Something had to get the two quibbling party members to put their differences aside. Putting his foot down, literally, did the trick. “Once we accomplish this quest, you two can go your separate ways. We may be a party formed through the force of coercion, but hopefully this quest will forge a strong bond of friendshi-”\n\n[i]TSEEEEEEEER![/i]\n\n“Here comes another.” Trevelyan curled his lips into a grin. “Seerus, ready your arrows.”\n\n“I would, boss, but I’m down two, I’ve got probably twenty left-”\n\n[i]TSEEEEEEER!\n\nTSEEEEEEER![/i]\n\n“Oh gods…” Therrin audibly gulped, the thief looking back down at the mahogany-shaded hard earth at his feet. “There’s more of them-”\n\n[i]TSEEEEEER![/i]\n\n“Men, to arms!” Trevelyan brought his greatsword around to an offensive position. Sure enough, Therrin was right. A group of five arachnoid creatures skittered toward them, their cherry-red exoskeletons doing nothing to camouflage them from observant eyes.\n\n[i]Crunch!\n\nThhhhp! Thhhp![/i]\n\nArrow and melee weapon alike performed a gloriously gory symphony, punctuated by exclamations as sharpened instruments found and exploited their adversaries’ weak points. The chaotic concert continued, especially as more cherry-colored creatures skittered swiftly from their origin point to avenge their fallen comrades.\n\n“How many does that make now?” Seerus yelped during a brief break in the fighting. He had been diligent in recovering arrows from his fallen adversaries, but was critically low on ammunition.\n\n“I think I’m at about ten slain… You, Seerus?” Therrin quipped.\n\n[i]“Eleven.”[/i]\n\nTrevelyan’s sword cleaved an arachnoid’s head from its thorax, the separated body part rolling like a biological stone while he moved to focus on a new target.\n\n“More slaying, less braying.” The knight scowled through his adrenaline rush.\n\n[i]*POP!*[/i]\n\nA loud noise rent the heavens asunder. Seerus could feel his ears pop, Therrin was too focused on attempting to ride an arachnoid his dagger was stuck inside. Trevelyan looked to the sky.\n\n“What was that?” Seerus yelped. Somehow, the arachnoids must have detected the same sound. The marauding creatures began to swiftly skitter away. Trevelyan had to forcibly grab Therrin by his collar to avoid being carried away.\n\n“Great, now I’m down a dagger…” the thief whined. “Where are they going in such a hurry?”\n\nDarkness, not the darkness of night, but mimicking an eclipse, cast a pall over the three adventurers. A rather… pleasant? Fragrance rapidly surged up the nostrils of the knight, the ranger, and the thief.\n\n“By the gods…” Trevelyan turned to face the very origin of the swiftly encroaching shadow. Feeling a sense of divine intervention, perhaps in his and his party members’ favor, the hedge knight dropped his sword and fell to his knees, hands clasped in prayer as a wall, engraved with enormous, mysterious sigils, began to sweep swiftly in the group’s direction…\n\n“May the maker preserve u-” the knight uttered before the wall’s impact knocked the very wind from his lungs, enshrouding him, Seerus, and Therrin in a soft, lavender-scented embrace.\n\n\n_________________________________________________________________________\n\nCadence rolled their eyes. The civet hadn’t used their coffee table in a long time, but a quick glance at the calendar revealed that not only was the weekly [i]Taverns and Travelers[/i] game today, they were the one hosting it this time. Most of the morning was spent cleaning up the floor, but now they had to clear the game-space. In the rush to ensure everything was in order, Cadence had run out of dedicated disinfectant cloths, but had settled on an alternative that they thought would work just as well.\n\n[i]CareKraft Wet Wipes, with Baby Fresh Scent. [/i]\n\nOne of their friends had left a box of them behind during his last visit. Figuring that these would work just as well as generic disinfecting wipes in a pinch, Cadence dropped the box on the couch and popped the top. Cadence snatched the first cloth that popped up, giving it a once-over with their eyes before sliding the cartoon-character emblazoned wipe along the wooden table. Fibers engineered to capture the various textures of bodily wastes and other messes worked just as well at capturing dust on a disused piece of furniture!\n\nCadence gave the tabletop one swipe, and then another, carving away the layer of dust and its accompanying micro-ecosystem with each pass. By the end, a dark patina formed on the cloth. Better there than in the noses of their guests, Cadence thought. Their task completed, Cadence wadded up the wipe in their hand, stepping toward the kitchen to dispose of it. Memories of the past few games kept the civet’s brain busy while they crossed the expanse of floor, and unceremoniously deposited the wipe in its new, proper home. This was bound to be an interesting session, they were facing a giant boss this time around!\n\nHopefully, today’s session wouldn’t end with a total party wipe…\n", "writing_bbcode_parsed": "Total Party Wipe
A non-canon short by Cadence Andrysiak

“AAAGH!”

Trevelyan exhaled as he swung his greatsword into the thorax of the encroaching arachnoid. Finely-crafted steel met exoskeleton, resulting in a sickening crunch. Withdrawing his sword, an arrow swiftly plunged true into the breach. A second one followed close behind.

“TSEEEEEEEER!” the arachnid burbled in terminal pain, falling dead onto its side. Yellow ichor spilled from the wound onto the ground, puddling around the knight’s boots.

“Are all quests this messy?” Trevelyan growled, wiping sweat from his brow. That voice wasn’t his. He turned his head, the cloth-armored ranger of the group moving his bow to a comfortable position on his back.

“Well…” Trevelyan replied, Seerus, the group’s ranger, was about to reply before the knight extended an armored hand in an attempt to keep him from stating the obvious.

“Yes, yes, I know that this location is rife with arachnoids, but we’re here to slay each and every one of them.”

“I’m gonna need more arrows.” Seerus reported. “Are any of those reusable?” He remarked, looking at the corpse of their latest quarry.

“You probably should have bothered buying some at the last fletcher shop we were at…” Another voice sounded. Therrin, the group’s thief, spoke matter-of-factly, rushing to catch up to the other two members of the team, breathing heavily from his finished sprint.

“Ah, yes, the very place you got us kicked out of.” Seerus snarked in return.

“We needed more money, so…”

“Did you HAVE to try to get it from the same place I was trying to buy things from?”

“Well he DID look away long enough to-”

“GENTLEMEN!” Trevelyan’s voice thundered. The hedge knight rolled his eyes after the other two focused their gazes on his armored form. “I know we haven’t exactly gotten off to a good start, but if we accomplish this quest, perhaps that will convince the guards to leave us be. Perhaps we might even be paid well for services rendered.”

“More than what I could make by stealing?” Therrin chimed in with a rising intonation

“Yes, even that.” Trevelyan replied. “Though next time, try to get here quicker, Therrin. Your daggers could easily find gaps in their exoskeletons to exploit.”

“That’s not the only one of those out here, is it?” Seerus shivered. He longed for the fibrous forests he was used to navigating, versus this expansive plain that stretched beyond the horizon.

“Far from it, didn’t you pay attention when we got this quest?” Therrin replied with a snarky tone. “I may prefer the darkness of The Walls, but this beats rotting in a dungeon for failing to get away from another attempted heist unscathed.”

“You call opening a chest a heist-”

“Gentlemen!” Trevelyan raised a steel-clad boot and slammed it down, splashing some of the deceased creature’s ichor further up his greaves. Something had to get the two quibbling  party members to put their differences aside. Putting his foot down, literally, did the trick. “Once we accomplish this quest, you two can go your separate ways. We may be a party formed through the force of coercion, but hopefully this quest will forge a strong bond of friendshi-”

TSEEEEEEEER!

“Here comes another.” Trevelyan curled his lips into a grin. “Seerus, ready your arrows.”

“I would, boss, but I’m down two, I’ve got probably twenty left-”

TSEEEEEEER!

TSEEEEEEER!

“Oh gods…” Therrin audibly gulped, the thief looking back down at the mahogany-shaded hard earth at his feet. “There’s more of them-”

TSEEEEEER!

“Men, to arms!” Trevelyan brought his greatsword around to an offensive position. Sure enough, Therrin was right. A group of five arachnoid creatures skittered toward them, their cherry-red exoskeletons doing nothing to camouflage them from observant eyes.

Crunch!

Thhhhp! Thhhp!

Arrow and melee weapon alike performed a gloriously gory symphony, punctuated by exclamations as sharpened instruments found and exploited their adversaries’ weak points. The chaotic concert continued, especially as more cherry-colored creatures skittered swiftly from their origin point to avenge their fallen comrades.

“How many does that make now?” Seerus yelped during a brief break in the fighting. He had been diligent in recovering arrows from his fallen adversaries, but was critically low on ammunition.

“I think I’m at about ten slain… You, Seerus?” Therrin quipped.

“Eleven.”

Trevelyan’s sword cleaved an arachnoid’s head from its thorax, the separated body part rolling like a biological stone while he moved to focus on a new target.

“More slaying, less braying.” The knight scowled through his adrenaline rush.

*POP!*

A loud noise rent the heavens asunder. Seerus could feel his ears pop, Therrin was too focused on attempting to ride an arachnoid his dagger was stuck inside. Trevelyan looked to the sky.

“What was that?” Seerus yelped. Somehow, the arachnoids must have detected the same sound. The marauding creatures began to swiftly skitter away. Trevelyan had to forcibly grab Therrin by his collar to avoid being carried away.

“Great, now I’m down a dagger…” the thief whined. “Where are they going in such a hurry?”

Darkness, not the darkness of night, but mimicking an eclipse, cast a pall over the three adventurers. A rather… pleasant? Fragrance rapidly surged up the nostrils of the knight, the ranger, and the thief.

“By the gods…” Trevelyan turned to face the very origin of the swiftly encroaching shadow. Feeling a sense of divine intervention, perhaps in his and his party members’ favor, the hedge knight dropped his sword and fell to his knees, hands clasped in prayer as a wall, engraved with enormous, mysterious sigils, began to sweep swiftly in the group’s direction…

“May the maker preserve u-” the knight uttered before the wall’s impact knocked the very wind from his lungs, enshrouding him, Seerus, and Therrin in a soft, lavender-scented embrace.


_________________________________________________________________________

Cadence rolled their eyes. The civet hadn’t used their coffee table in a long time, but a quick glance at the calendar revealed that not only was the weekly Taverns and Travelers game today, they were the one hosting it this time. Most of the morning was spent cleaning up the floor, but now they had to clear the game-space. In the rush to ensure everything was in order, Cadence had run out of dedicated disinfectant cloths, but had settled on an alternative that they thought would work just as well.

CareKraft Wet Wipes, with Baby Fresh Scent.

One of their friends had left a box of them behind during his last visit. Figuring that these would work just as well as generic disinfecting wipes in a pinch, Cadence dropped the box on the couch and popped the top. Cadence snatched the first cloth that popped up, giving it a once-over with their eyes before sliding the cartoon-character emblazoned wipe along the wooden table. Fibers engineered to capture the various textures of bodily wastes and other messes worked just as well at capturing dust on a disused piece of furniture!

Cadence gave the tabletop one swipe, and then another, carving away the layer of dust and its accompanying micro-ecosystem with each pass. By the end, a dark patina formed on the cloth. Better there than in the noses of their guests, Cadence thought. Their task completed, Cadence wadded up the wipe in their hand, stepping toward the kitchen to dispose of it. Memories of the past few games kept the civet’s brain busy while they crossed the expanse of floor, and unceremoniously deposited the wipe in its new, proper home. This was bound to be an interesting session, they were facing a giant boss this time around!

Hopefully, today’s session wouldn’t end with a total party wipe…
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