{"submission_id":"2506004","keywords":[{"keyword_id":"1188","keyword_name":"art","contributed":"f","submissions_count":"21776"},{"keyword_id":"36251","keyword_name":"article","contributed":"f","submissions_count":"23"},{"keyword_id":"7388","keyword_name":"gene","contributed":"f","submissions_count":"204"},{"keyword_id":"2","keyword_name":"sketch","contributed":"f","submissions_count":"45614"}],"hidden":"f","scraps":"t","favorite":"f","favorites_count":"10","create_datetime":"2021-08-06 11:44:09.473848+02","create_datetime_usertime":"06 Aug 2021 11:44 CEST","last_file_update_datetime":"2021-08-06 11:43:23.586356+02","last_file_update_datetime_usertime":"06 Aug 2021 11:43 CEST","username":"IceAgeChippies","user_id":"509185","user_icon_file_name":"147967_IceAgeChippies_chippy.jpg","user_icon_url_large":"https://nl.ib.metapix.net/usericons/large/147/147967_IceAgeChippies_chippy.jpg","user_icon_url_medium":"https://nl.ib.metapix.net/usericons/medium/147/147967_IceAgeChippies_chippy.jpg","user_icon_url_small":"https://nl.ib.metapix.net/usericons/small/147/147967_IceAgeChippies_chippy.jpg","file_name":"3684397_IceAgeChippies_art.jpg","file_url_full":"https://nl.ib.metapix.net/files/full/3684/3684397_IceAgeChippies_art.jpg","file_url_screen":"https://nl.ib.metapix.net/files/screen/3684/3684397_IceAgeChippies_art.jpg","file_url_preview":"https://nl.ib.metapix.net/files/preview/3684/3684397_IceAgeChippies_art.jpg","thumbnail_url_huge_noncustom":"https://nl.ib.metapix.net/files/preview/3684/3684397_IceAgeChippies_art.jpg","thumbnail_url_large_noncustom":"https://nl.ib.metapix.net/thumbnails/large/3684/3684397_IceAgeChippies_art_noncustom.jpg","thumbnail_url_medium_noncustom":"https://nl.ib.metapix.net/thumbnails/medium/3684/3684397_IceAgeChippies_art_noncustom.jpg","thumb_medium_noncustom_x":"120","thumb_medium_noncustom_y":"88","thumb_large_noncustom_x":"200","thumb_large_noncustom_y":"147","thumb_huge_noncustom_x":"300","thumb_huge_noncustom_y":"221","files":[{"file_id":"3684397","file_name":"3684397_IceAgeChippies_art.jpg","file_url_full":"https://nl.ib.metapix.net/files/full/3684/3684397_IceAgeChippies_art.jpg","file_url_screen":"https://nl.ib.metapix.net/files/screen/3684/3684397_IceAgeChippies_art.jpg","file_url_preview":"https://nl.ib.metapix.net/files/preview/3684/3684397_IceAgeChippies_art.jpg","mimetype":"image/jpeg","submission_id":"2506004","user_id":"509185","submission_file_order":"0","full_size_x":"795","full_size_y":"586","screen_size_x":"795","screen_size_y":"586","preview_size_x":"300","preview_size_y":"221","initial_file_md5":"5ba8faaa620db8cc2eda1b9a3bc5ed65","full_file_md5":"16a44ecd679f6094bce63362d271680c","large_file_md5":"f48e1321dd2d3908c7b4db65f4620320","small_file_md5":"8c1dd1d66782755fad41b725da1f3a34","thumbnail_md5":"88d3b6656c2f5effcc076f48e49539b9","deleted":"f","create_datetime":"2021-08-06 11:43:23.586356+02","create_datetime_usertime":"06 Aug 2021 11:43 CEST","thumbnail_url_huge_noncustom":"https://nl.ib.metapix.net/files/preview/3684/3684397_IceAgeChippies_art.jpg","thumbnail_url_large_noncustom":"https://nl.ib.metapix.net/thumbnails/large/3684/3684397_IceAgeChippies_art_noncustom.jpg","thumbnail_url_medium_noncustom":"https://nl.ib.metapix.net/thumbnails/medium/3684/3684397_IceAgeChippies_art_noncustom.jpg","thumb_medium_noncustom_x":"120","thumb_medium_noncustom_y":"88","thumb_large_noncustom_x":"200","thumb_large_noncustom_y":"147","thumb_huge_noncustom_x":"300","thumb_huge_noncustom_y":"221"}],"pools":[{"pool_id":"67394","name":"Everything Else","description":"Quickies, Comics, and other stuff of little to no value.","count":"209","submission_left_submission_id":"2501451","submission_left_file_name":"3676839_IceAgeChippies_2000s.jpg","submission_left_thumbnail_url_huge_noncustom":"https://nl.ib.metapix.net/files/preview/3676/3676839_IceAgeChippies_2000s.jpg","submission_left_thumbnail_url_large_noncustom":"https://nl.ib.metapix.net/thumbnails/large/3676/3676839_IceAgeChippies_2000s_noncustom.jpg","submission_left_thumbnail_url_medium_noncustom":"https://nl.ib.metapix.net/thumbnails/medium/3676/3676839_IceAgeChippies_2000s_noncustom.jpg","submission_left_thumb_medium_noncustom_x":"120","submission_left_thumb_medium_noncustom_y":"74","submission_left_thumb_large_noncustom_x":"200","submission_left_thumb_large_noncustom_y":"124","submission_left_thumb_huge_noncustom_x":"300","submission_left_thumb_huge_noncustom_y":"186","submission_right_submission_id":"2511698","submission_right_file_name":"3693717_IceAgeChippies_0.jpg","submission_right_thumbnail_url_huge_noncustom":"https://nl.ib.metapix.net/files/preview/3693/3693717_IceAgeChippies_0.jpg","submission_right_thumbnail_url_large_noncustom":"https://nl.ib.metapix.net/thumbnails/large/3693/3693717_IceAgeChippies_0_noncustom.jpg","submission_right_thumbnail_url_medium_noncustom":"https://nl.ib.metapix.net/thumbnails/medium/3693/3693717_IceAgeChippies_0_noncustom.jpg","submission_right_thumb_medium_noncustom_x":"108","submission_right_thumb_medium_noncustom_y":"120","submission_right_thumb_large_noncustom_x":"180","submission_right_thumb_large_noncustom_y":"200","submission_right_thumb_huge_noncustom_x":"269","submission_right_thumb_huge_noncustom_y":"300"}],"description":"So, how do I really feel about my art? Do I truly hate it, or is my self-deprecation ironic?\n\nFact is, I ...really dislike my art. I don't hate it, but I honestly dislike it.\n\nTo be clear, being unable to draw isn't a bad thing (most people can't), but there is more to consider on my end of things.\n\nLooking at what I do, objectively, without any consideration to the quality of my line art, I have a good thing going ...and a tragedy to go with. D:\n\nPROS:\n\n1. My product is consistent.\n\nI produce mostly one thing: trading cards. Trading cards appeal to many because they are small, easy to store/display, and (in my case) feature no end of characters.\n\nTL;DR: the product in and of itself, is good (this is NOT a statement about the line art).\n\n2. Subject. \n\nI take the common path of nostalgia, with a lean towards obscure/ancillary characters.\nOccasionally, I'll draw popular/contemporary characters (such as Pikachu), but my usual flavor is a bit more tropical/uncommon. Moreover, I don't hang on any one series or franchise for too long, so my selections aren't repetitive.\n\nTL;DR: the subject material is good: nostalgia is a thing, and one ever knows who/what I'll draw next (this is NOT a statement about the line art).\n\n3. Traditional.\n\nI make only traditional art---I don't own a digital tablet and don't believe in them. Each card is a real item existing in time and space, and touched by the artist.\nFor some persons, this has/adds value, but is NOT a statement about the line art.\n\n4. Curiosity.\n\nI have a gimmick or trademark that began a little over a year ago: the featuring of vintage wooden pencils.\nThe pencils add a bit of interest to my uploads even if the pencils are inherently separate from the cards. Only issue is my art often makes the pencils look bad---this IS a statement about the line art. :p\n\n5. Supplemental material.\n\nLast, I often include long descriptions with my cards (which may or may not actually say anything of value). Some people like this, I guess. ^^\n\nCONS:\n\n1 (and only 1). I CAN'T FUCKING DRAW! D:\n\nI don't often swear in my descriptions, but a well-placed F-bomb can be effective, and I believe the above usage emphasizes my point very well.\n\nIt feels ...wrong? It feels wrong that I seem to have a good thing going, but it can never realize its full potential simply because I have no skill as an artist (this is the tragedy).\n\nTL;DR: one reason I cannot like my art because the poor quality of it gets in its way.\n\n===============\n\n\"But, Chippy, I love your drawings!\"\n\nNot to put words or thoughts into anyone's mouth or mind, but, here's where I think that sentiment derives...\n\nI'm a member of the furry community who doesn't have too much in the way of malice or drama on his record. Oh, there certainly is some here and there, but for the most part I'm a peaceful artist who's here to upload trading cards---I don't think IB, FA or DA are meant as platforms for political or divisive commentary.\n\nPoint is, it's easy not to dislike the art of a person who keeps their mouth shut.\n\n\"That's not it, Chippy!\"\n\nYes it is. :3\n\nA bit of perspective,\n\nMy S/O and I would go out to dinner every Friday night, and we always had at least one guest with us (sometimes more).\nMy S/O and her guests were accomplished persons with many decades of history and experiences behind them. In other words, they could (and often would) talk for hours about these things.\n\nI would sit there with my dinner, taking care to eat it as slowly as possible so as not to finish before anyone else. Reason for this is I, as a consequence of both autism and having no life to speak of, would keep quiet throughout dinner (one finishes dinner faster if one's mouth isn't busy talking).\nIf I did say more than a few words (which wasn't often), I'd be praised for them, whether I said anything of value or not (and believe me, I didn't). In some instances, I would be told I was smart and other (likely unintentionally) condescending things. :p\n\nThe application here is, because I'm not ranting on InkBunny about the workings of the world or spreading hate, I'm accepted ...and by extension, so is my art.\n\nCould I be mistaken; don't people mean the things they say?\n\nI think people are nice, esp. to those within one's group (which is to be expected). That said, I don't take compliments at face value.\n\nMy S/O would sometimes say to me in private that [our dinner guests] love me. My retort was that they didn't---they're being polite to YOU; besides, it's easy to be liked when one is quiet.\nMy cynicism was validated. After my S/O died, no one from her circle ever contacted me on their own, save for practical reasons by those who were handling her estate.\n\nSo, again, I've learned not to take compliments/praise at face value, and not to delude myself with a false sense of esteem or favor.\n\nI've tested my cynicism in other ways, such as by making deliberately poor art (such as that scribble of Gene on a napkin) to see if it would be accepted ...and it was---it received about the same number of faves as some sketches I've put effort into.\n\nNapkin: https://inkbunny.net/s/2315027\n\nSimilar number of faves as: https://inkbunny.net/s/1931238\n\nFaves (which are, effectively, compliments) don't mean anything to me.\n\nMy S/O used to compliment every little drawing I'd do, telling me how great my art was. I showed her some art on DA and FA made by art gods ...to which my S/O would always say mine was better.\n\nOne day, I showed her something I didn't draw, but I claimed that I had. She praised it, then I told her the truth (she didn't like that! lol).\nWhat was more telling was her initial reaction, which was to the effect of, 'You did that!?'.\n\nDeep down, she knew I couldn't draw---I just admitted it before she did. :3\n\nWhy did my S/O say she liked my art?\n\nAgain, she was an accomplished person whose friends and acquaintances were of similar status (engineers, doctors, professors and so forth). Contrariwise, there I was with no meaningful accomplishments or prospects ...but I had these stupid animal drawings.\nI think those cartoons amused her, especially given the fact she knew no other human being who drew such things ...and as my cartoons were the only thing I had that came from my hands, my S/O praised them beyond what they should have been. That was my take then, and my perspective hasn't changed.\n\nNow, perhaps it's unfair to compare the feelings of someone I was in love with to those of my watchers.\n\nI suppose my watchers view me from the following angle, related to what I said before,\n\n'Chippy is active and replies to comments; he's not racist, sexist, political, or given to gossip, fetish-shaming, etc---Chippy's not problematic.\nChippy is active, (mostly) consistent, and he drew a character I like. Why should I bring Chippy down?' :3\n\nThis is a primal/ancestral thing; we're apes, after all, and think as such (perhaps more now than ever). In light of that, the above could be restated as,\n\n\"As one of our tribe who contributes and has been around a while, it's more likely than not that Chippy would tell us if he knew there was a saber-tooth tiger in that cave ...so, let's encourage him!\" :3=\n\nI'm not saying I'm right, but I've learned to think this way and can't seem to *unlearn it.\n\n*'unlearn' is among those words I dislike. I'll not get into it here, but its existence and application implies that not everything we believe or think we know is absolute.\nHypothetically, I could unlearn these negative ideas, but I would remember having those ideas (the process of re-education would be sufficient to remind me). Therefore, unless I truly internalized my 'new perspectives', I'd eventually return to cynicism (my default reality) anyway.\n\n===============\n\nPerhaps one is of the opinion that it's all subjective: I say my art's bad, but others disagree. Both opinions are valid!\n\nI think subjectivity comes into play when one is comparing apples with apples or oranges to oranges (preferring Miyazaki over Disney, for example).\nBut if one compares an apple with an orange, well... one has problems (comparing an animation cell of Cindy Bear to the Mona Lisa).\n\nI could bang on some pots and pans and call it music ...on one hand, not many would tell me I'm wrong ...but on the other, almost no one would say my pots and pans could compete with Metallica.\n\nCompare my art with a valentine some 6-year-old boy made for his mommy in school? Apples to apples\n...but in the big wide world of cartooning, my art is bad (full stop).\n\nKeep practicing, you say?\n\nI have said, and continue to say, \"I can't draw, either, but that doesn't stop me' ...so, I concur. :3\n\nOn that point, though, I've seen DeviantArtists with (and I'm not kidding) over 40,000 uploads ...and not naming names, but I don't see improvement.\n\nI think each person has a plateau. :3\n\nBut let's look at some evidence---what does it say?\n\nArt from 2001: https://inkbunny.net/s/2193766\n\nArt from 2009: https://www.deviantart.com/martenferret/art/Krypto-the-Superdog-133399812\n\nArt made the other day: https://inkbunny.net/s/2505051\n\nArt I consider my objective best (2021): https://inkbunny.net/s/2385162 (for consistency and arrangement, though it was between this and 'Gene's Nightmare' for best)\n\nArt I've been told is my objective best (2019): https://inkbunny.net/s/1917020\n\nLast, this is art I consider my average (2021): https://inkbunny.net/s/2399962\n\nImprovement? Minimal at best.\n\nPika Pats isn't here, but I will mention it... Pika Pats is among the FEW pieces of actual 'art' (by definition) that I've ever made ...but its line art is terrible; Pika Pats is my 'pride' flag. :3\n\n===============\n\nWhy do I bother to draw?\n\nTo answer that, I'll need to get into my art history a little bit.\n\nDA: Deviant for 14 years\n\nFA: Registered Since: Mar 26, 2007 06:41\n\nIB (not my first account): Joined 3 years ago\n\nI joined Yerf in 2002 ...suffice it to say I've been around a while and have a furry art history. ^^\n\nMoreover, as one of my above-linked drawings testifies, I was drawing even before I joined Yerf.\nWhen did I first begin? What did I draw? Where is the art?\n\nI cannot know when I first began to draw, but I know I was YOUNG, like pre-school age. I drew the things kids draw ...and I had a dinosaur character I identified with.\nMy dinosaur was inspired by some of Phil Tippett's stop-motion sequences found in 'Dinosaur!': a 1985 special hosted by Christopher Reeve. I saw this when it aired on The Disney Channel, likely around 1987/'88 or so (for perspective, I was born in 1981).\n\nIn the early 1990's, I drew creatures and things from Ed Emberley books, specifically the 'Purple' and Red' ones.\nI added some of these creatures to my dinosaur cartoons, and later dropped the dinosaur to draw myself (as a person) going on strange adventures (stories that were inspired by things I saw on TV).\n\nThen I stopped drawing for several years. :3\n\nIn the early 2000's, I decided I wanted to learn how to draw for real. I got some Christopher Hart 'Kids Draw' books and began drawing (unlike most, I actually did try drawing with guidelines and circles). ^^\nI would try applying these techniques to the characters from 'Franklin' (and I did fairly well).\nFrom this, I thought of creating OCs. Among my first was Marten Ferret. :3\n\nLater, I made a DeviantArt account and literally BEGGED people to let me draw their characters for practice (boy how times change!).\nI went about this by proposing art trades---I'd draw one's character in exchange for a drawing of Gene (MT was being developed at this time ...yes, Gene is that old).\n\nSometime in the mid 2000's, I made some art for BlackDog.net (a now defunct children's site).\n\nThen I stopped drawing for several more years, because adult with job; I focused more on writing MT than drawing.\n\nLife happened, and writing came (mostly) to an end. D:\n\nAround 2010-2011, I made art to entertain friends on Neopets. I also began rewriting MT, but only here and there.\n\nIn 2015, I began drawing porn to express myself sexually ...quickly repenting of that, and seeking answers as regards my sexuality, I began drawing Timmy stuff.\nAlong with that, I began drawing ACO cards (these would become the One-Cent ACO). This has continued to present day.\n\nToday, I draw three things (these are they):\n\n1. ACO\n2. Comics\n3. Timmy\n\nTimmy: I drew Timmy to understand my sexuality and (later) to have some fun with it. Timmy's purpose has been served and the character is now mostly retired.\n\nComics: I'm retiring these as fast as I can, but it's not easy. :P\nThe main purpose these served was to do something with Gene and Tasli ...to kinda make up for never completing MT.\n\nACO: This one's complicated. ^^\n\nEarly in my relationship with my S/O, she discovered my drawings and, as I said earlier, she over-esteemed them. She would always ask 'When are you going to do something with your drawing?', and suchlike. :p\n\nOne day, I was on eBay browsing for Pikachu cards. It happened I found a Pikachu ACO for sale. I bought it, because it was a dollar. :3\n\nI was amused by the concept of ACO, and thought, moreover, I could use them to stop my S/O from nagging me about my art.\n\nI went about this by drawing some Pikachu scribbles on typing paper. I cut them out (ACO-size) and posted them for auction on eBay.\nThe idea was I would put my art out in the world of retail, and they would fail ...and in that way, I would prove my art had no value.\n\nThough I had an agenda, I wanted to be fair. I decided to offer the drawings auction style, beginning at one penny each, with free shipping (my S/O agreed to supply the stamps---this endeavor wasn't to cost me anything).\n\nThe damned things sold---every one of them; a few even covered the cost of their respective stamps (I didn't use shipping labels---I relied on the buyers to be honest). :p\n\nThough the cards had sold, my conclusion was they weren't worth enough to bother selling: the cards as a whole had lost money. Still, I continued to make more cards for eBay.\nA couple dozen or so cards in, a buyer who'd just paid for their card DM'd me, saying they'd just left me positive feedback and wanted me to return the favor.\nI hadn't yet mailed their card to them, so the conclusion was some were buying these cards ONLY to get feedback points; they didn't want the art.\n\nAs I refused to auction my cards at more than one cent to avoid disinterested buyers, I effectively stopped offering my cards on eBay.\nDespite this, every time I made a new card (for myself), my S/O would ask, \"How much will you get for it?\". :p\n\nTo this day I hate accepting money or any recompense for my art.\n\nTo be fair, some buyers did like my drawings. One purchaser asked if I would draw a big picture of Pupcake for them to buy.\nI made them a big Pupcake drawing, and gave it to them free (they seemed to enjoy it).\n\nSome previous buyers bid a few dollars on one or two of my cards. One of these buyers found me on DeviantArt and began watching me.\nSmall things like that. :3\n\nI continued making the ACO cards even after the death of my S/O, but I kept them. :(\n\nBy that time, I had amassed some watchers on DA, FA and IB---enough to justify offering some cards for sale again (I knew the sales wouldn't be for feedback). I did this in memory of my S/O. :)\n\nPresently, I draw ACO out of habit, as well as to show off some of my pencil collection.\n\n===============\n\nWhy do I dislike my art?\n\nMy art is bad, sure, but I like some objectively bad things in art and media (most of us do)---why don't I like my art?\n\nBecause I made it.\n\nI've been scarred in my life, to put it mildly. Additionally, I dunno what it's like to achieve something, esp. something of value.\nFor example, I don't know what it's like to get an A on a test, be proud of it, and see it on the fridge door; that's not an experience I've known (no, I haven't had much schooling).\n\nI'm a person of limited capabilities; always have been. For example, at 40, I cannot tie shoes and have never driven a vehicle (I don't trust myself to). Simple math boggles me, and now in my later years I've pretty much become (more) useless as a person.\n\nThe relevance here is I've not succeeded at anything most take for granted, yet alone anything of significance ...and I never will.\nIt follows, then, that my art HAS to be bad; it can't be anything else, no matter what anyone says to the contrary.\n\nI cannot tell myself it's all in my head when I can see it plain as day.\n\nHere is an example of me trying to do well, by redrawing a character (read description): https://inkbunny.net/s/2501049\n\nAll that effort, and my dumb ass forgets to finish filling in the mask. I refuse to fix it; I need to remember my shame here, and others need to be aware of it.\n\nWant more; there's plenty!\n\nA typical ACO of Gene--my own character: https://sta.sh/01bs59hpt90c\n\nIs it bad?\n\nIt's easy to fall into trivial semantics here, 'What is meant by 'bad'' and so forth. I'm not going to play that game, so let's have the art speak for itself.\n\nI (or anyone) can take a straight edge to this, draw lines through it and point out everything that's a millimeter off here, there, and so on.\nOthers could pick on smaller things, such as that diagonal line forming the back of Gene's shirt.\nHyperextended/-arched? Probably ...but look at the very, very tip of it---Gene's shirt sleeve should go over that, not 'behind' it (we're talking a fraction of a line that's about as long as the 'dot' under the exclamation point of 'Substitutes' ...yet it's there, and I cannot defend it).\n\nWant more? I got ya covered, bruh!\n\nThe far eyebrow is off; the tail is too low; the close leg 'might' be too long (hard call); the toes are asymmetric; the pad is off-center; the back of the shirt needs to be redrawn; the 'Y' shape formed by the coming-together of the muzzle and cheeks displays crowding; the close leg of Gene's shorts should lie flat at the top.\n\nUltimately it doesn't matter---even if it were flawless, all my art would end up in a dumpster anyway; the art of most person's will (I worked the better part of a decade in estate liquidation, so I know what I'm talking about; I've personally tossed the artifacts of many lives in a dumpster).\n\nOverall, the card's a fail-fail-fail-fail ...and of my own character, too (you can't make this stuff up)!\n\nEven so,\n\n74 views\n25 favorites\n\n1:3 ...Not a bad ratio, but why the acceptance?\n\n1. OC (original characters are integral to furry culture, therefore such characters are encouraged)\n\n2. Cub (the favorite characters of childhood were often kids ...also 'InkBunny')\n\n3. Paws (going barefoot means you're not human)\n\n4. Because apes fear saber-toothed tigers\n\nI cannot see it differently\n\nRawr! :3=\n","description_bbcode_parsed":"So, how do I really feel about my art? Do I truly hate it, or is my self-deprecation ironic?
Fact is, I ...really dislike my art. I don't hate it, but I honestly dislike it.
To be clear, being unable to draw isn't a bad thing (most people can't), but there is more to consider on my end of things.
Looking at what I do, objectively, without any consideration to the quality of my line art, I have a good thing going ...and a tragedy to go with. D:
PROS:
1. My product is consistent.
I produce mostly one thing: trading cards. Trading cards appeal to many because they are small, easy to store/display, and (in my case) feature no end of characters.
TL;DR: the product in and of itself, is good (this is NOT a statement about the line art).
2. Subject.
I take the common path of nostalgia, with a lean towards obscure/ancillary characters.
Occasionally, I'll draw popular/contemporary characters (such as Pikachu), but my usual flavor is a bit more tropical/uncommon. Moreover, I don't hang on any one series or franchise for too long, so my selections aren't repetitive.
TL;DR: the subject material is good: nostalgia is a thing, and one ever knows who/what I'll draw next (this is NOT a statement about the line art).
3. Traditional.
I make only traditional art---I don't own a digital tablet and don't believe in them. Each card is a real item existing in time and space, and touched by the artist.
For some persons, this has/adds value, but is NOT a statement about the line art.
4. Curiosity.
I have a gimmick or trademark that began a little over a year ago: the featuring of vintage wooden pencils.
The pencils add a bit of interest to my uploads even if the pencils are inherently separate from the cards. Only issue is my art often makes the pencils look bad---this IS a statement about the line art. :p
5. Supplemental material.
Last, I often include long descriptions with my cards (which may or may not actually say anything of value). Some people like this, I guess. ^^
CONS:
1 (and only 1). I CAN'T FUCKING DRAW! D:
I don't often swear in my descriptions, but a well-placed F-bomb can be effective, and I believe the above usage emphasizes my point very well.
It feels ...wrong? It feels wrong that I seem to have a good thing going, but it can never realize its full potential simply because I have no skill as an artist (this is the tragedy).
TL;DR: one reason I cannot like my art because the poor quality of it gets in its way.
===============
"But, Chippy, I love your drawings!"
Not to put words or thoughts into anyone's mouth or mind, but, here's where I think that sentiment derives...
I'm a member of the furry community who doesn't have too much in the way of malice or drama on his record. Oh, there certainly is some here and there, but for the most part I'm a peaceful artist who's here to upload trading cards---I don't think IB, FA or DA are meant as platforms for political or divisive commentary.
Point is, it's easy not to dislike the art of a person who keeps their mouth shut.
"That's not it, Chippy!"
Yes it is. :3
A bit of perspective,
My S/O and I would go out to dinner every Friday night, and we always had at least one guest with us (sometimes more).
My S/O and her guests were accomplished persons with many decades of history and experiences behind them. In other words, they could (and often would) talk for hours about these things.
I would sit there with my dinner, taking care to eat it as slowly as possible so as not to finish before anyone else. Reason for this is I, as a consequence of both autism and having no life to speak of, would keep quiet throughout dinner (one finishes dinner faster if one's mouth isn't busy talking).
If I did say more than a few words (which wasn't often), I'd be praised for them, whether I said anything of value or not (and believe me, I didn't). In some instances, I would be told I was smart and other (likely unintentionally) condescending things. :p
The application here is, because I'm not ranting on InkBunny about the workings of the world or spreading hate, I'm accepted ...and by extension, so is my art.
Could I be mistaken; don't people mean the things they say?
I think people are nice, esp. to those within one's group (which is to be expected). That said, I don't take compliments at face value.
My S/O would sometimes say to me in private that [our dinner guests] love me. My retort was that they didn't---they're being polite to YOU; besides, it's easy to be liked when one is quiet.
My cynicism was validated. After my S/O died, no one from her circle ever contacted me on their own, save for practical reasons by those who were handling her estate.
So, again, I've learned not to take compliments/praise at face value, and not to delude myself with a false sense of esteem or favor.
I've tested my cynicism in other ways, such as by making deliberately poor art (such as that scribble of Gene on a napkin) to see if it would be accepted ...and it was---it received about the same number of faves as some sketches I've put effort into.
Napkin: https://inkbunny.net/s/2315027
Similar number of faves as: https://inkbunny.net/s/1931238
Faves (which are, effectively, compliments) don't mean anything to me.
My S/O used to compliment every little drawing I'd do, telling me how great my art was. I showed her some art on DA and FA made by art gods ...to which my S/O would always say mine was better.
One day, I showed her something I didn't draw, but I claimed that I had. She praised it, then I told her the truth (she didn't like that! lol).
What was more telling was her initial reaction, which was to the effect of, 'You did that!?'.
Deep down, she knew I couldn't draw---I just admitted it before she did. :3
Why did my S/O say she liked my art?
Again, she was an accomplished person whose friends and acquaintances were of similar status (engineers, doctors, professors and so forth). Contrariwise, there I was with no meaningful accomplishments or prospects ...but I had these stupid animal drawings.
I think those cartoons amused her, especially given the fact she knew no other human being who drew such things ...and as my cartoons were the only thing I had that came from my hands, my S/O praised them beyond what they should have been. That was my take then, and my perspective hasn't changed.
Now, perhaps it's unfair to compare the feelings of someone I was in love with to those of my watchers.
I suppose my watchers view me from the following angle, related to what I said before,
'Chippy is active and replies to comments; he's not racist, sexist, political, or given to gossip, fetish-shaming, etc---Chippy's not problematic.
Chippy is active, (mostly) consistent, and he drew a character I like. Why should I bring Chippy down?' :3
This is a primal/ancestral thing; we're apes, after all, and think as such (perhaps more now than ever). In light of that, the above could be restated as,
"As one of our tribe who contributes and has been around a while, it's more likely than not that Chippy would tell us if he knew there was a saber-tooth tiger in that cave ...so, let's encourage him!" :3=
I'm not saying I'm right, but I've learned to think this way and can't seem to *unlearn it.
*'unlearn' is among those words I dislike. I'll not get into it here, but its existence and application implies that not everything we believe or think we know is absolute.
Hypothetically, I could unlearn these negative ideas, but I would remember having those ideas (the process of re-education would be sufficient to remind me). Therefore, unless I truly internalized my 'new perspectives', I'd eventually return to cynicism (my default reality) anyway.
===============
Perhaps one is of the opinion that it's all subjective: I say my art's bad, but others disagree. Both opinions are valid!
I think subjectivity comes into play when one is comparing apples with apples or oranges to oranges (preferring Miyazaki over Disney, for example).
But if one compares an apple with an orange, well... one has problems (comparing an animation cell of Cindy Bear to the Mona Lisa).
I could bang on some pots and pans and call it music ...on one hand, not many would tell me I'm wrong ...but on the other, almost no one would say my pots and pans could compete with Metallica.
Compare my art with a valentine some 6-year-old boy made for his mommy in school? Apples to apples
...but in the big wide world of cartooning, my art is bad (full stop).
Keep practicing, you say?
I have said, and continue to say, "I can't draw, either, but that doesn't stop me' ...so, I concur. :3
On that point, though, I've seen DeviantArtists with (and I'm not kidding) over 40,000 uploads ...and not naming names, but I don't see improvement.
I think each person has a plateau. :3
But let's look at some evidence---what does it say?
Art from 2001: https://inkbunny.net/s/2193766
Art from 2009: https://www.deviantart.com/martenferret/art/Krypto-the-...
Art made the other day: https://inkbunny.net/s/2505051
Art I consider my objective best (2021): https://inkbunny.net/s/2385162 (for consistency and arrangement, though it was between this and 'Gene's Nightmare' for best)
Art I've been told is my objective best (2019): https://inkbunny.net/s/1917020
Last, this is art I consider my average (2021): https://inkbunny.net/s/2399962
Improvement? Minimal at best.
Pika Pats isn't here, but I will mention it... Pika Pats is among the FEW pieces of actual 'art' (by definition) that I've ever made ...but its line art is terrible; Pika Pats is my 'pride' flag. :3
===============
Why do I bother to draw?
To answer that, I'll need to get into my art history a little bit.
DA: Deviant for 14 years
FA: Registered Since: Mar 26, 2007 06:41
IB (not my first account): Joined 3 years ago
I joined Yerf in 2002 ...suffice it to say I've been around a while and have a furry art history. ^^
Moreover, as one of my above-linked drawings testifies, I was drawing even before I joined Yerf.
When did I first begin? What did I draw? Where is the art?
I cannot know when I first began to draw, but I know I was YOUNG, like pre-school age. I drew the things kids draw ...and I had a dinosaur character I identified with.
My dinosaur was inspired by some of Phil Tippett's stop-motion sequences found in 'Dinosaur!': a 1985 special hosted by Christopher Reeve. I saw this when it aired on The Disney Channel, likely around 1987/'88 or so (for perspective, I was born in 1981).
In the early 1990's, I drew creatures and things from Ed Emberley books, specifically the 'Purple' and Red' ones.
I added some of these creatures to my dinosaur cartoons, and later dropped the dinosaur to draw myself (as a person) going on strange adventures (stories that were inspired by things I saw on TV).
Then I stopped drawing for several years. :3
In the early 2000's, I decided I wanted to learn how to draw for real. I got some Christopher Hart 'Kids Draw' books and began drawing (unlike most, I actually did try drawing with guidelines and circles). ^^
I would try applying these techniques to the characters from 'Franklin' (and I did fairly well).
From this, I thought of creating OCs. Among my first was Marten Ferret. :3
Later, I made a DeviantArt account and literally BEGGED people to let me draw their characters for practice (boy how times change!).
I went about this by proposing art trades---I'd draw one's character in exchange for a drawing of Gene (MT was being developed at this time ...yes, Gene is that old).
Sometime in the mid 2000's, I made some art for BlackDog.net (a now defunct children's site).
Then I stopped drawing for several more years, because adult with job; I focused more on writing MT than drawing.
Life happened, and writing came (mostly) to an end. D:
Around 2010-2011, I made art to entertain friends on Neopets. I also began rewriting MT, but only here and there.
In 2015, I began drawing porn to express myself sexually ...quickly repenting of that, and seeking answers as regards my sexuality, I began drawing Timmy stuff.
Along with that, I began drawing ACO cards (these would become the One-Cent ACO). This has continued to present day.
Today, I draw three things (these are they):
1. ACO
2. Comics
3. Timmy
Timmy: I drew Timmy to understand my sexuality and (later) to have some fun with it. Timmy's purpose has been served and the character is now mostly retired.
Comics: I'm retiring these as fast as I can, but it's not easy. :P
The main purpose these served was to do something with Gene and Tasli ...to kinda make up for never completing MT.
ACO: This one's complicated. ^^
Early in my relationship with my S/O, she discovered my drawings and, as I said earlier, she over-esteemed them. She would always ask 'When are you going to do something with your drawing?', and suchlike. :p
One day, I was on eBay browsing for Pikachu cards. It happened I found a Pikachu ACO for sale. I bought it, because it was a dollar. :3
I was amused by the concept of ACO, and thought, moreover, I could use them to stop my S/O from nagging me about my art.
I went about this by drawing some Pikachu scribbles on typing paper. I cut them out (ACO-size) and posted them for auction on eBay.
The idea was I would put my art out in the world of retail, and they would fail ...and in that way, I would prove my art had no value.
Though I had an agenda, I wanted to be fair. I decided to offer the drawings auction style, beginning at one penny each, with free shipping (my S/O agreed to supply the stamps---this endeavor wasn't to cost me anything).
The damned things sold---every one of them; a few even covered the cost of their respective stamps (I didn't use shipping labels---I relied on the buyers to be honest). :p
Though the cards had sold, my conclusion was they weren't worth enough to bother selling: the cards as a whole had lost money. Still, I continued to make more cards for eBay.
A couple dozen or so cards in, a buyer who'd just paid for their card DM'd me, saying they'd just left me positive feedback and wanted me to return the favor.
I hadn't yet mailed their card to them, so the conclusion was some were buying these cards ONLY to get feedback points; they didn't want the art.
As I refused to auction my cards at more than one cent to avoid disinterested buyers, I effectively stopped offering my cards on eBay.
Despite this, every time I made a new card (for myself), my S/O would ask, "How much will you get for it?". :p
To this day I hate accepting money or any recompense for my art.
To be fair, some buyers did like my drawings. One purchaser asked if I would draw a big picture of Pupcake for them to buy.
I made them a big Pupcake drawing, and gave it to them free (they seemed to enjoy it).
Some previous buyers bid a few dollars on one or two of my cards. One of these buyers found me on DeviantArt and began watching me.
Small things like that. :3
I continued making the ACO cards even after the death of my S/O, but I kept them. :(
By that time, I had amassed some watchers on DA, FA and IB---enough to justify offering some cards for sale again (I knew the sales wouldn't be for feedback). I did this in memory of my S/O. :)
Presently, I draw ACO out of habit, as well as to show off some of my pencil collection.
===============
Why do I dislike my art?
My art is bad, sure, but I like some objectively bad things in art and media (most of us do)---why don't I like my art?
Because I made it.
I've been scarred in my life, to put it mildly. Additionally, I dunno what it's like to achieve something, esp. something of value.
For example, I don't know what it's like to get an A on a test, be proud of it, and see it on the fridge door; that's not an experience I've known (no, I haven't had much schooling).
I'm a person of limited capabilities; always have been. For example, at 40, I cannot tie shoes and have never driven a vehicle (I don't trust myself to). Simple math boggles me, and now in my later years I've pretty much become (more) useless as a person.
The relevance here is I've not succeeded at anything most take for granted, yet alone anything of significance ...and I never will.
It follows, then, that my art HAS to be bad; it can't be anything else, no matter what anyone says to the contrary.
I cannot tell myself it's all in my head when I can see it plain as day.
Here is an example of me trying to do well, by redrawing a character (read description): https://inkbunny.net/s/2501049
All that effort, and my dumb ass forgets to finish filling in the mask. I refuse to fix it; I need to remember my shame here, and others need to be aware of it.
Want more; there's plenty!
A typical ACO of Gene--my own character: https://sta.sh/01bs59hpt90c
Is it bad?
It's easy to fall into trivial semantics here, 'What is meant by 'bad'' and so forth. I'm not going to play that game, so let's have the art speak for itself.
I (or anyone) can take a straight edge to this, draw lines through it and point out everything that's a millimeter off here, there, and so on.
Others could pick on smaller things, such as that diagonal line forming the back of Gene's shirt.
Hyperextended/-arched? Probably ...but look at the very, very tip of it---Gene's shirt sleeve should go over that, not 'behind' it (we're talking a fraction of a line that's about as long as the 'dot' under the exclamation point of 'Substitutes' ...yet it's there, and I cannot defend it).
Want more? I got ya covered, bruh!
The far eyebrow is off; the tail is too low; the close leg 'might' be too long (hard call); the toes are asymmetric; the pad is off-center; the back of the shirt needs to be redrawn; the 'Y' shape formed by the coming-together of the muzzle and cheeks displays crowding; the close leg of Gene's shorts should lie flat at the top.
Ultimately it doesn't matter---even if it were flawless, all my art would end up in a dumpster anyway; the art of most person's will (I worked the better part of a decade in estate liquidation, so I know what I'm talking about; I've personally tossed the artifacts of many lives in a dumpster).
Overall, the card's a fail-fail-fail-fail ...and of my own character, too (you can't make this stuff up)!
Even so,
74 views
25 favorites
1:3 ...Not a bad ratio, but why the acceptance?
1. OC (original characters are integral to furry culture, therefore such characters are encouraged)
2. Cub (the favorite characters of childhood were often kids ...also 'InkBunny')
3. Paws (going barefoot means you're not human)
4. Because apes fear saber-toothed tigers
I cannot see it differently
Rawr! :3=
","writing":"","writing_bbcode_parsed":"","pools_count":1,"title":"How Do I REALLY Feel About My Art?","deleted":"f","public":"t","mimetype":"image/jpeg","pagecount":"1","rating_id":"0","rating_name":"General","ratings":[],"submission_type_id":"1","type_name":"Picture/Pinup","guest_block":"f","friends_only":"f","comments_count":"56","views":"83"}