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Ok. That can be his name.\n\nFuck, but it's just so hard to get motivated... and STAY that way.\n\n... or, if that's not his [i]name[/i]... uh, just following my train of thought. No foxyfluffs were harmed in the making of this scribble. Unless you like that sort of thing.\n\nI don't know. I'm just so tired, and life is so stressful. Yeah, I know, \"always has been\" etc. etc.\n\nConsider it uncharted territory, then. Life, that is. For both metaphorically and literally, nobody ever returns. Change. You know.\n\nFunny... on the topic of trains of thought... there goes a train. There are almost never any trains on that old track these days. Am I psychic? I know, I sound drunk or something... probably... but actually, I'm starting to think that stone cold sobriety is not very good for you at all. Nope. Not one drop. Unhealthy for both mind and body.\n\nBut, all things in moderation, of course. Sobriety... the uh... opposite of sobriety. Everything else too. Solitude. Isolation. All work... or all play.\n\nThis is my mind tonight. Feels a little derailed. The scribble is from two days ago maybe? Just aimlessness. Helplessness. Hopelessness.\n\nI'm trying to... I think... try to explain... what's bothering me, without actually spelling it all out because what's the point in that? I mean, I'm not implying that nobody cares or anything, it's just that this grand game of life... it takes no prisoners. It shows no mercy. It gives no fucks. I'm sure you all do care, to a perfectly reasonable extent... but I'm not sure you can help. I don't know that at all, but it's hard to imagine how anyone can.\n\nI feel like that is the root of many similar sketches I have made; sometimes, you just feel like this lost, confused little fox, being dragged around by forces beyond your control. In such a way that even those ways in which it is good... well, it doesn't feel so good.\n\nJust trying to follow my train of thought tonight. Really disheartened and down spirited... dispirited... wait. Those are the same word, aren't they.\n\nIt's cold. I'm tired. Houses are expensive, but never mind the expense, because I don't even know if I'm responsible enough or capable enough to live on my own. By myself. I needed my own space to stretch my wings a long time ago, and now... it just feels like it's too late. For everything. I'm bad at self-motivation. I'm too easily torn down by the slightest metaphorical \"bump\" in the road ahead... even though I know there are plenty more to come. Big ones. Just over the horizon... so very far away, but growing ever closer. Each day.\n\nStone. Cold. Sober.\n\nI know this explicitly, beyond not being a drinker, because I actually DID buy a bottle of a little something something a few weeks ago to share with the family, haha. First time I've ever bought anything like that. It was a nice drink to have every now and then... or a nice drink to toast the end of the world, perhaps... made a nice change from tea and coffee, but then so did a caramel latte... but really, I see that drinking is just another expensive hobby, when all is said and done. When done responsibly, at least. Unfortunately, we've all seen what can happen to people who can't control themselves. The cost manifests in a different way than mere money.\n\nI don't know where I'm going with this.\n\nBut then, does anyone?\n\nMoney. Bloody. Fucking. Money. But in the absence of money... anarchy. Madness. Societal collapse. It's a thousand year old trap, with no way out. This is not news.\n\nI think, ultimately, the issue I'm struggling with isn't the cost of a house, or rent, or what nowhere town to buy one in. The issue is the same as when I have the house to myself for a day or three.\n\n\"What the fuck do I do?\" Why, whatever I want to, of course! \"SO what did I DO?\" Sweet fucking nothing. That's what. \"What abotu the dishes?\" DUck off. \"What about the course I started.\" What do you mean started? \"I could draw?\" Nah, I've got work later, I'd rather just relax... \"...or did I just finish work?\"\n\nHell, aren't we all sick of those jokes about time just blurring together because of lockdown? Didn't time already just blur together because of work, for you too? Or was that just me?\n\nOk. Think I'll stop there. Think I ran out of steam... oh, no wait!\n\n\"I didn't know this train of thought was a... STEAM train!\"\n\n... yup, that'll do it. Goodnight.", "description_bbcode_parsed": "Yeah. Ok. That can be his name.

Fuck, but it's just so hard to get motivated... and STAY that way.

... or, if that's not his name... uh, just following my train of thought. No foxyfluffs were harmed in the making of this scribble. Unless you like that sort of thing.

I don't know. I'm just so tired, and life is so stressful. Yeah, I know, "always has been" etc. etc.

Consider it uncharted territory, then. Life, that is. For both metaphorically and literally, nobody ever returns. Change. You know.

Funny... on the topic of trains of thought... there goes a train. There are almost never any trains on that old track these days. Am I psychic? I know, I sound drunk or something... probably... but actually, I'm starting to think that stone cold sobriety is not very good for you at all. Nope. Not one drop. Unhealthy for both mind and body.

But, all things in moderation, of course. Sobriety... the uh... opposite of sobriety. Everything else too. Solitude. Isolation. All work... or all play.

This is my mind tonight. Feels a little derailed. The scribble is from two days ago maybe? Just aimlessness. Helplessness. Hopelessness.

I'm trying to... I think... try to explain... what's bothering me, without actually spelling it all out because what's the point in that? I mean, I'm not implying that nobody cares or anything, it's just that this grand game of life... it takes no prisoners. It shows no mercy. It gives no fucks. I'm sure you all do care, to a perfectly reasonable extent... but I'm not sure you can help. I don't know that at all, but it's hard to imagine how anyone can.

I feel like that is the root of many similar sketches I have made; sometimes, you just feel like this lost, confused little fox, being dragged around by forces beyond your control. In such a way that even those ways in which it is good... well, it doesn't feel so good.

Just trying to follow my train of thought tonight. Really disheartened and down spirited... dispirited... wait. Those are the same word, aren't they.

It's cold. I'm tired. Houses are expensive, but never mind the expense, because I don't even know if I'm responsible enough or capable enough to live on my own. By myself. I needed my own space to stretch my wings a long time ago, and now... it just feels like it's too late. For everything. I'm bad at self-motivation. I'm too easily torn down by the slightest metaphorical "bump" in the road ahead... even though I know there are plenty more to come. Big ones. Just over the horizon... so very far away, but growing ever closer. Each day.

Stone. Cold. Sober.

I know this explicitly, beyond not being a drinker, because I actually DID buy a bottle of a little something something a few weeks ago to share with the family, haha. First time I've ever bought anything like that. It was a nice drink to have every now and then... or a nice drink to toast the end of the world, perhaps... made a nice change from tea and coffee, but then so did a caramel latte... but really, I see that drinking is just another expensive hobby, when all is said and done. When done responsibly, at least. Unfortunately, we've all seen what can happen to people who can't control themselves. The cost manifests in a different way than mere money.

I don't know where I'm going with this.

But then, does anyone?

Money. Bloody. Fucking. Money. But in the absence of money... anarchy. Madness. Societal collapse. It's a thousand year old trap, with no way out. This is not news.

I think, ultimately, the issue I'm struggling with isn't the cost of a house, or rent, or what nowhere town to buy one in. The issue is the same as when I have the house to myself for a day or three.

"What the fuck do I do?" Why, whatever I want to, of course! "SO what did I DO?" Sweet fucking nothing. That's what. "What abotu the dishes?" DUck off. "What about the course I started." What do you mean started? "I could draw?" Nah, I've got work later, I'd rather just relax... "...or did I just finish work?"

Hell, aren't we all sick of those jokes about time just blurring together because of lockdown? Didn't time already just blur together because of work, for you too? Or was that just me?

Ok. Think I'll stop there. Think I ran out of steam... oh, no wait!

"I didn't know this train of thought was a... STEAM train!"

... yup, that'll do it. Goodnight.", "writing": "", "writing_bbcode_parsed": "", "pools_count": 0, "title": "Scraps", "deleted": "f", "public": "t", "mimetype": "image/png", "pagecount": "1", "rating_id": "2", "rating_name": "Adult", "ratings": [ { "content_tag_id": "4", "name": "Sexual Themes", "description": "Erotic imagery, sexual activity or arousal", "rating_id": "2" } ], "submission_type_id": "1", "type_name": "Picture/Pinup", "guest_block": "t", "friends_only": "f", "comments_count": "4", "views": "235" }