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An Anthropomorphic Novel

This is a work of fiction and is not intended to portray any actual events, persons living or dead or undead; or any character in a virtual environment or from any other printed work. Legal Notice: This story is Copyright © 2003-present by Joe Martelle. This story may not be sold or used for commercial profit in any form or fashion. This story may not be modified in any way. This story may not be posted on a mirror site or any other Internet site without the written permission of the author. This story may not be distributed on print, magnetic, electrical or optical mediums.
Rick Coona, Gwen Smith Coona, Kacy “KC” Coona, Kirk Otterman, Mike Ferretti, Cassy Bhunny Ferretti, Max Badger, Kath Badger, Bill Badger, Ted Badger, Bruno, Lupé Carlotta, Panda Phil, Jo-Ann Procyon, Charles Procyon, Marcus Procyon, Jack Canus, Esmerelda Smyth, Richard Coona, Helen Coona, Max Coona, Sally Coona, et.al. © Joe Martelle

Any resemblance to any person or fur, living, dead, or fictional is coincidental", "writing": "[center]Chapter 50\nGetting The Word Out[/center]\n\nWhen they arrived back home they found me on the phone.\n\t\"...Yeah mom, I know it's…oh! They just got back.\" Covering the mouthpiece with my paw, I kissed my wife, and gave Kel a peck on the cheek. Gwen handed me the paperwork.\n\t\"Hey Mom! Yup, it's official! ...What? Oh, it says six or eight weeks, so figure late April or May, you and pops are going to be grandparents! Uh-huh—okay, here she is,\" I said, handing the phone off to Gwen.\n\t\"Hello...yup it's official, I'm under construction.\" Gwen chuckled. \"What was that Helen? Yes! Sure, tell everyone. No no, I'm fine, really—oh, okay sure…RIICK...your dad wants to talk with you...\"\n From down the hall, I responded with \"Bathroom.\" \n\t\"Hello? Oh, thank you Richard...yup, got a bun in the oven…yes were thrilled, Rick's in the bathroom; he'll be here in a minute—well we figure some time around late April, early May...nope, have no ideas yet. Too soon, you know. Okay thanks, here's Rick.\"\n\t\"Hey Pops! Yeah...thanks—uh-huh oh you know it! Well you've still got a while to get ready to be a Grandpa...don't worry, I will...okay C-ya buh-bye!\" I said, hanging up the phone and a huge smile on my muzzle. I dropped to my knees, wrapping my arms around Gwen's hips, placing my head against her belly.\n\t\"Hey in there, I love you! And I'm looking forward to welcoming you into the world.\" I said, kissing her lower abdomen. Gwen ran her paw through my hair, skritching my ear and smiling down at me. \n\"You're Silly, Ya know that?\" I stood, nodding and enfolding her in my arms. \n\"Hi, Mom.\" I beamed. \n\"Hi Dad,\" she said softly and drew me into a kiss. Kel sighed happily.\n \t\"You guys are going to be great parents.\" Gwen turned, drawing her into our embrace. \t\"And you are going to be a wonderful aunt…Auntie Kelso…\" I gave her a quick nuzzle. \t\"Auntie Kelso...I like it.\" Kel grinned. \"So how'd they take the news?\"\n\t\"Well it was a pleasant, if not unexpected surprise. But they are thrilled.\" I chuckled. \t\"They never thought they would see grandkits, what with Kacy being a professional chef, and until I met Gwen here, they were calling me a confirmed bachelor. They were surprised when we met on Friday, and were hitched two days later!\" I shook my head, a sly grin on my muzzle. \"Mom said she always figured she'd get some grandkits outta you my Love. Mom said that they absolutely loved you from the moment KC brought you through the door. And I know they would love you too, Kel. Isn't that right hon?\"\n\n\t\"Oh, most definitely. \" Gwen nodded. \"Richard and Helen would take one look at you, and you'd be as welcome as I am. And let me tell you, they are two of the most gracious furs you could ever meet. Besides...Max and Sally would probably fight over who got to spend the most time with you.\" \n\t\"Who are Max and Sally?\" The vixen in our arms asked.\n\t\"They would be Rick's younger sibs.\" Gwen added, as I nodded.\n\t\"Let's see, Max is fourteen, and Sally is ten. Max is as big a science geek as I was at that age, though he hasn't blown anything up…yet. And Sally is a budding writer.\" I chuckled. \"If you're not careful, she will write you into one of her stories...probably have you wandering the countryside with a Blazing Sword of Justice, righting wrongs and freeing the oppressed on a white horse…Kelso the Sword-Singer or some such...\"\n\t\"Really?\" We both nodded. \"That would be so cool.\" she said, breaking the hug \n\t\"Oh, your mother called—she was actually civil this time, and asked that you call her back at your earliest convenience.\" I said flatly. \nGwen rolled her eyes and went to retrieve the phone.\n\t\"What's up Rick, doesn't her mom like you?\" I shook my head, taking her aside.\n\t\"Gwen's mother—does not approve of me. She comes from one of the blue-blood families, back east. Likes to think of themselves as American aristocracy...upper crust, don't you know. When Gwen 'ran-off' with me, her mom took it as a personal affront to her dignity. Apparently she was in the process of arranging to marry her off to some skunk from Massachusetts. A wealthy industrialist and fellow 'pure-blood,' don't you know.\"\nKel's jaw dropped. \"You're kidding? Y—you mean she's...a purist?\" she gasped. I nodded sadly.\n\t\"Fraid so. She sees me as 'polluting the family bloodline' or so she said. Gwen's little bit of news should give the old bat a coronary.\" I chuckled evilly. \"Personally, I don't give a damn what she thinks of me…but the last time they spoke, Gwen ended up in tears. And that is something I won't stand for.\" I growled softly.\n\t\"Perhaps we should be there for moral support.\" Kel offered. We found Gwen in the kitchen, leaning against the refrigerator, her voice frosty...\n\t\"Yes, Mother. Be that as it may...I was calling to give you some good news...no, I haven't left Rick; and as I've said before I'm not interested in an annulment!\" she said with a snarl etched on her features. \"I just wanted to congratulate you—you're going to be a Grandmother!\" Gwen held the phone away from her ear. Her mother’s tirade could easily be heard from where we stood. After a minute or so of that, Gwen pounced with venom dripping from her words...\n\t\"I love you too, Mother...just wanted to deliver the good news, personally. Buh-bye.” With that, she hung up the phone, chuckling victoriously. \"Aah, that's the trouble with ivory tower types...one good whack with a wrecking ball, and everything comes crashing down \taround their ears!\" She grinned wickedly \"That was good, she actually dropped her sherry glass—I heard it shatter. You'd think I was impaling kits on skewers and roasting them over an open fire, with the way she went on...\" she said, shaking her head and grumbling darkly.\n\t\"Well...KC did say they were wonderful, with the right sauce...\" I grinned at my beloved. That brought her out of her grumbling.\n\t\"Ya know, I never thought I'd ever be able to top that catalog shoot stunt; she went BALLISTIC over that!\" \n\t\"The 2000 Furdracks Christmas catalog? I've still got that one.\" I beamed. \t\"You're kidding?\" Gwen blushed just a bit. \"Ooh I wanna see!\" Kel chirped. \n\t\"Hold on a sec,\" As I disappeared down the hall, to return a few moments setting a copy of the Furdrakes of Hollywood, Christmas 2000 catalog on the table. Kel sat mesmerized, while Gwen and I stood at her side providing commentary as the Vixen 'ooed' and 'aahed' her way through the catalog. All too soon it was time to prepare for work, and just before we left I let it be known I wanted to frame the confirmation notice. Gwen rolled her eyes. It was after all, a historic document, I pointed out. \n# # \n \t\"HEN-RY! Come quickly. That insolent daughter of mine has caused me to spray the parlor again.\" The matronly skunk called, \"and watch your paws, I broke a sherry glass!\" She coughed a bit at the intensity of her own musk. She was beside herself; what would Charles say now? \"M-yes, Madam…\" The badger butler replied as he approached.\n\t \"If Madam would keep her tail down, when speaking with her daughter…\"\n\t\"Muzzle IT, Henry. I don't pay you for advice!\" she snarled. \"I will not stand for this! After you finish with the parlor, get me Charles on the phone...perhaps he and a few of his frat-boys can beat some sense into that miscreant who assaulted my pure daughter.\" She stormed off down the hall. \"M-yes, Madam.\" the badger intoned, as he began spraying down the parlor with odor eliminator. The last time she did this, her daughter had appeared in a lingerie catalog, the butler mused.\n\n[center]# # #[/center]", "writing_bbcode_parsed": "
Chapter 50
Getting The Word Out


When they arrived back home they found me on the phone.
\t"...Yeah mom, I know it's…oh! They just got back." Covering the mouthpiece with my paw, I kissed my wife, and gave Kel a peck on the cheek. Gwen handed me the paperwork.
\t"Hey Mom! Yup, it's official! ...What? Oh, it says six or eight weeks, so figure late April or May, you and pops are going to be grandparents! Uh-huh—okay, here she is," I said, handing the phone off to Gwen.
\t"Hello...yup it's official, I'm under construction." Gwen chuckled. "What was that Helen? Yes! Sure, tell everyone. No no, I'm fine, really—oh, okay sure…RIICK...your dad wants to talk with you..."
 From down the hall, I responded with "Bathroom."
\t"Hello?  Oh, thank you Richard...yup, got a bun in the oven…yes were thrilled, Rick's in the bathroom; he'll be here in a minute—well we figure some time around late April, early May...nope, have no ideas yet. Too soon, you know. Okay thanks, here's Rick."
\t"Hey Pops! Yeah...thanks—uh-huh oh you know it! Well you've still got a while to get ready to be a Grandpa...don't worry, I will...okay C-ya buh-bye!" I said, hanging up the phone and a huge smile on my muzzle.  I dropped to my knees, wrapping my arms around Gwen's hips, placing my head against her belly.
\t"Hey in there, I love you! And I'm looking forward to welcoming you into the world." I said, kissing her lower abdomen. Gwen ran her paw through my hair, skritching my ear and smiling down at me.
"You're Silly, Ya know that?" I stood, nodding and enfolding her in my arms.
"Hi, Mom." I beamed.
"Hi Dad," she said softly and drew me into a kiss. Kel sighed happily.
 \t"You guys are going to be great parents." Gwen turned, drawing her into our embrace. \t"And you are going to be a wonderful aunt…Auntie Kelso…" I gave her a quick nuzzle. \t"Auntie Kelso...I like it."  Kel grinned. "So how'd they take the news?"
\t"Well it was a pleasant, if not unexpected surprise. But they are thrilled." I chuckled. \t"They never thought they would see grandkits, what with Kacy being a professional chef, and until I met Gwen here, they were calling me a confirmed bachelor. They were surprised when we met on Friday, and were hitched two days later!" I shook my head, a sly grin on my muzzle. "Mom said she always figured she'd get some grandkits outta you my Love. Mom said that they absolutely loved you from the moment KC brought you through the door. And I know they would love you too, Kel. Isn't that right hon?"

\t"Oh, most definitely. " Gwen nodded. "Richard and Helen would take one look at you, and you'd be as welcome as I am. And let me tell you, they are two of the most gracious furs you could ever meet. Besides...Max and Sally would probably fight over who got to spend the most time with you."
\t"Who are Max and Sally?" The vixen in our arms asked.
\t"They would be Rick's younger sibs." Gwen added, as I nodded.
\t"Let's see, Max is fourteen, and Sally is ten. Max is as big a science geek as I was at that age, though he hasn't blown anything up…yet. And Sally is a budding writer." I chuckled. "If you're not careful, she will write you into one of her stories...probably have you wandering the countryside with a Blazing Sword of Justice, righting wrongs and freeing the oppressed on a white horse…Kelso the Sword-Singer or some such..."
\t"Really?" We both nodded. "That would be so cool." she said, breaking the hug
\t"Oh, your mother called—she was actually civil this time, and asked that you call her back at your earliest convenience." I said flatly.  
Gwen rolled her eyes and went to retrieve the phone.
\t"What's up Rick, doesn't her mom like you?"  I shook my head, taking her aside.
\t"Gwen's mother—does not approve of me. She comes from one of the blue-blood families, back east. Likes to think of themselves as American aristocracy...upper crust, don't you know. When Gwen 'ran-off' with me, her mom took it as a personal affront to her dignity. Apparently she was in the process of arranging to marry her off to some skunk from Massachusetts. A wealthy industrialist and fellow 'pure-blood,' don't you know."
Kel's jaw dropped. "You're kidding? Y—you mean she's...a purist?" she gasped. I nodded sadly.
\t"Fraid so. She sees me as 'polluting the family bloodline' or so she said. Gwen's little bit of news should give the old bat a coronary." I chuckled evilly. "Personally, I don't give a damn what she thinks of me…but the last time they spoke, Gwen ended up in tears. And that is something I won't stand for." I growled softly.
\t"Perhaps we should be there for moral support." Kel offered. We found Gwen in the kitchen, leaning against the refrigerator, her voice frosty...
\t"Yes, Mother. Be that as it may...I was calling to give you some good news...no, I haven't left Rick; and as I've said before I'm not interested in an annulment!" she said with a snarl etched on her features. "I just wanted to congratulate you—you're going to be a Grandmother!" Gwen held the phone away from her ear. Her mother’s tirade could easily be heard from where we stood. After a minute or so of that, Gwen pounced with venom dripping from her words...
\t"I love you too, Mother...just wanted to deliver the good news, personally. Buh-bye.” With that, she hung up the phone, chuckling victoriously. "Aah, that's the trouble with ivory tower types...one good whack with a wrecking ball, and everything comes crashing down \taround their ears!" She grinned wickedly "That was good, she actually dropped her sherry glass—I heard it shatter. You'd think I was impaling kits on skewers and roasting them over an open fire, with the way she went on..." she said, shaking her head and grumbling darkly.
\t"Well...KC did say they were wonderful, with the right sauce..." I grinned at my beloved. That brought her out of her grumbling.
\t"Ya know, I never thought I'd ever be able to top that catalog shoot stunt; she went BALLISTIC over that!"  
\t"The 2000 Furdracks Christmas catalog? I've still got that one." I beamed. \t"You're kidding?" Gwen blushed just a bit. "Ooh I wanna see!" Kel chirped.
\t"Hold on a sec," As I disappeared down the hall, to return a few moments setting a copy of the Furdrakes of Hollywood, Christmas 2000 catalog on the table. Kel sat mesmerized, while Gwen and I stood at her side providing commentary as the Vixen 'ooed' and 'aahed' her way through the catalog. All too soon it was time to prepare for work, and just before we left I let it be known I wanted to frame the confirmation notice. Gwen rolled her eyes. It was after all, a historic document, I pointed out.
# #
 \t"HEN-RY! Come quickly. That insolent daughter of mine has caused me to spray the parlor again." The matronly skunk called, "and watch your paws, I broke a sherry glass!" She coughed a bit at the intensity of her own musk. She was beside herself; what would Charles say now? "M-yes, Madam…" The badger butler replied as he approached.
\t "If Madam would keep her tail down, when speaking with her daughter…"
\t"Muzzle IT, Henry. I don't pay you for advice!" she snarled. "I will not stand for this! After you finish with the parlor, get me Charles on the phone...perhaps he and a few of his frat-boys can beat some sense into that miscreant who assaulted my pure daughter." She stormed off down the hall. "M-yes, Madam." the badger intoned, as he began spraying down the parlor with odor eliminator. The last time she did this, her daughter had appeared in a lingerie catalog, the butler mused.

#     #     #
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