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  "description": "A fantastic commission done by Kagisnad https://www.furaffinity.net/user/kagisnad/\n\nOriginal here: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/13024100/\n\n\nDuo sitting in the woods, burnt out, reflecting on his life. A companion piece to Birthday-Forgotten Cemetery in which there he reflected upon the death of a close friend. Here he is reflecting upon other things of that dark nature. Kagisnad captured the mood of Duo great. He looks annoyed, burnt out, and sad all at once, you can see it in the eyes. Expect a long description ahead.\n\n\n\n\"The price of my divinity. Is it too high? I often ask myself this question and feel my answer should be a yes. One life to be taken is always too much of a price to ask. I am very tired of having to kill my friends, to have to watch them in their final moments, some even giving me that split second look of shock; their eyes screaming 'why?'\n\n'I have had to destroy planets, punish groups for what they have done against us. I am used to doing this, and I do so with a heavy heart, as a father would punish a child. It is for the better so they learn, but that goes as far as punishment, when it comes to killing and destruction, that is difficult for me, though I have to have the ability to do so without a second thought. Any hesitation could be enough time for more to be hurt.\n\n'I always try to avoid that kind of situation. I do my best to avoid it, and sadly, I am unable to for the most of the time. My first war was something that could not be avoided. It was a small war by our standards, and so many lives were lost. I knew their fate, but I did not like to see their period of life here cut short, and in such a horrible manor. Many of the killed wished to die of old age, feeling they were not going to die that day. I could not take it, I do not like going to war, leading my army into battle to slaughter. A reason why I am glad to have Akila, who commands my armies and is able to tolerate such devastation. But that only concerns war, not extinction.\n\n'During that horrible time of my divinity known as the great extinction, when that wretch of an entity set out to destroy us, so much life was lost, so many innocence corrupted. The biggest insult we have ever faced; making us feel helpless in our own divinity and dominion. Even in this dark time, I had to kill the innocence, and those innocent that I had to kill were my close friends. My little friends, the jibblies and the malikai. Both were there for me in the past, always there, I even chose to make my first palace so I could be with them. But they were so small, so innocent, so loving. I loved them so much, so much. But I could not bare the thought of them being corrupted and eternally damned, and the choice came to me that the only method of salvation for them before this great wickedness came upon their world, was to kill them before their souls could be corrupted.\n\n'First, were my dear friends the malikai. My dear sweet friend Milar, whom was a member of this species, understood what I had to do, but it was very troubling for him to accept. He would be spared from this fate as his role in the greater battle was needed. The death of the malikai, I chose to be subtle, calm, peaceful. I took all their lives in their sleep and I personally delivered them to salvation. Those souls, shocked at my action, knew whom I was and trusted that I did what was best for them, and they were fine. They knew their time was over, but the pain it caused me was awful. These were the people who first loved me.\n\n'Second were the jibblies, a tribe that helped out the malikai. They, sadly, had to be dealt with quickly. I was going to give them the same painless sleeping death, though the wickedness had made itself know, and there was little time to react, little time to create an escape. They understood the situation, and they were brave. This, I hesitated. I had never tried to force myself to kill such a large group at once, especially a group I treasured dearly. In my youth, I was a trained to be in my home worlds army, I knew that you have to be fast, but they never trained us for a slaughter of this scale. With a single wave of my hand, I sent out a ray of death, beaming in light and just as fast, going to each jibblie one by one. Their faces, illuminated and frozen in shock and horror. It was ugly. Horrible. To see such pain, though be it a single instant; to see the faces of those you loved and whom loved you, frozen with that shock, twisted with the agony of the final suffering, knowing you are the one to cause their deaths, this suffering. That is a very deep and tearful feeling, and I have always hated it. I still tear up today thinking about it, but their fate was sealed and saved. They went on to paradise and were not taken to be damned.'\n\n'An age or so passed before I had to do such actions again. A planet that I had direct influence on, were not obeying me. They had corrupted and murdered their world with pollution. They feared death from creating gases to choke the planet so much that they removed such pollutions from their world, and in turn created a worse nightmare. Vegetation grew quickly, creating too much air, and the planet became hotter and hotter. They were frightened but I had to watch them. I told them to keep faith, I told them to pray, I told them to ask. The few who did, were not enough, they wanted action now and environmental activists set out a plot to conquer a neighboring world.\n\n'They created death charges and weapons to go and take this world, and I begged them to pray and ask, and they still refused to do so. They wanted to take fate into their own hands; they wanted to take care of themselves and refused my help. The few who did trust me, they were rewarded afterwards. I made sure their fate, be it grim, was a mode of escape before my final judgement came. The other gods felt i should impose my wrath upon them, that I should bring plagues and destruction so they can cry out in fear to pray for mercy. I disagreed, because the action would only cause them to do so out of fear, and not by their own will. I did not wish them to cause or create war, and i sent some angels of mine to give a final warning. They did not listen, and now judgement was here.\n\n'I myself appeared to the world and told them that they have not kept to my order and divine will, they would instead choose to take the lives of another world by force. They had the option of accepting their fate with humility, they had the option to keep prayers and keep hope alive, to ask me and acknowledge their own faults. They had so much pride, thinking they could fix it themselves by taking another world and forgotten about me with the years. I gave them signs, they made excuses to ignore, even being there in person they chose to ignore and dismiss me as something else. And then I gave them their demise. They so feared being burned that they would slaughter the innocent of another world to escape such a fate, that I burned them worse. I did not have the intention to torture, but the method of death was the one they feared the most, and they all knew their mistakes.\n\n'More time passed, and more judgements on worlds, more punishments to my angels for betrayals. But it was always those whom were my friends that I had to kill that pained me the most. One of which was Weavian, I believe that is how you pronounce his name in this tongue. He and i remained friends for many ages, hundreds and hundreds of years, maybe a couple of thousand. He was always happy and we would take trips and journey together to various worlds, having lots of fun with the locals, being silly, fun, and just having things out together. But being a god of love, there were things I had to defend, and he had a big issue with himself that I could reflect upon. He could not find a love.\n\n'Weavian would get to the point to be married to someone, and often, they would die or leave before their marriage. He would ask me to help, and I often would, setting him up with the right people he could get along with the most, and yet this still happened. With time I learned he was beating them, hurting them. I am not the kind of dragon to peer into anothers mind without permission, it is disrespectful. In this case, I should have. He was abusing the women, sometimes his rage would kill them.\n\n'I demanded he stop this action, he was doing a great injustice. His final would be mate fled to me for protection and this changed him. He took arms against me and I subdued him. I said I would not kill him and he is acting the fool. I could alter the chemicals in his body to get him level again, he refused, feeling I would change him and take his love away. And he tried to come at me again, and then she, in her ignorance, came to my aid, forgetting of my divinity, and she was stabbed. Weavian was devastated, and seeing me hold his bloodied bride caused him to jump out the window and escape, driving him mad. I revived his beloved and set out to find my friend, to help him, but he continued to distance himself from me, stating I was the one who caused him this pain, putting the blame on me.\n\n'He was mad. Eventually making dark deals to set up devices to slaughter innocence just to get my attention. I asked him not to do this, not to set them off. I had the power to stop him easily, I could easily remove the devices, he had to submit to me. But he refused, stating he would have to kill me. I made a final plea and his answer was he would not have his allies slaughter upon his death, if I fought him as a mortal. I agreed, and altered myself to a form I nearly forgotten. And we fought by sword, a mode i was not too familiar with, but in the end, it was up to me to take his head. He dared me to do it, and i refused, telling him I was done killing friends. I dropped the sword, turned my back, and returned to my love form. This was not enough for him, he would accept my generosity, and threatened to kill a city. I could sense the presence of reapers, meaning if they were slain, I would be unable to bring them back, the god of death in this area, Viscero, made it clear that if they died, i would have no part in having them returned. I had no choice, I turned to face him again, stated I did not want to kill him, pleading that he not force me to kill him. He was angry and charged me, stabbing me in the stomach, but I grabbed him by the throat, clenching. I watched him mad as a dog, slandering against me at my face, holding his throat feeling the life leave his body, watching as his anger and hatred remained with him until the end. Then i let his corpse fall to the ground, and left his soul to the reapers. I was done with this and wanted to be on my own.\n\n'Ive had to kill so many of my friends in my life. Sometimes I had to be harsh, others I was merciful. In one case, another friend turned violent, and made a deal with humans. Gaining hold of technology that could give him power to rival that of our own. He challenged me to a fight, holding a world hostage like a mad doomsdayer. We fought, I humored him, and though he was my friend, his point was becoming clear to those around him. He wanted to show that there was no need for us, that we have no true power and they were believing. I could not allow him to win, it was against our will, I could easily crush him, but was trying to reason with him, and then his pride set in. I decided I had no choice but to send a message to all of them. He attacked again and I started using more of my power, and I slowly, piece by piece, dismantled his device as well as disarming his device. They had forgotten that we control the cosmos, that a mere machine could never rival us. And he crawled in fear, fear of his life, and then he stood. An associate in the crowd tossed him a bomb able to blow up the planet, a crude back up plan. I shot a beam from my eyes, zapping my friend to instant death. I took the device and left the world to be punished by famine until they understood their mistake and repented. Though my friend was now gone and I did my own privet mourning for his soul.\n\n'The worst case I have encountered for killing my friend, came because of that fiend Chaos. The god of chaos, Chaos thusly named himself Chaos since no one else could do it like him. He has always targeted me in the past to play his games, belittling my nudity at one point by taking my penis away and hiding it. I could create a new one, though that fiend had hostages in certain areas of his game forcing me to play. Chaos would often do these kinds of games in different forms, always holding souls captive. Not just to me either.\n\n'In this case, I had five friends from different tribes and worlds. Chaos one day took them away, wanting to play another twisted game. Though this one was to satisfy a curiosity he had about myself. Chaos wanted to know what it could take to either break me, or for me to shift into my other self. He implied he would make my actions decide how each friend was to die, and that they would all die. Something sick and twisted of him. I could easily revive them, the gods of death detested chaos very much, but he was also a god. He could take the souls for himself and keep them in eternal chaos, doing as he willed with them, shifting them into strange objects, threatening to even leave them to be taken by demon reapers to hell.\n\n'I was supposed to decide how they would be tortured and killed. The longer the deaths, the more satisfied he would be. I refused to involve myself in his gambit, that if he harmed them that I would annihilate him. He laughed, stating if I did not play he would send more galaxies into chaos. He would continue to torment too many innocent souls until I would snap and released the dark dragon again. He enjoyed the dark dragon, it caused a lot of havoc that he relished in the chaos. I warned the other gods would not stand for it and he only laughed, pointing out their retaliation against him would only cause more chaos and death, that this time he was willing to go to that extreme to get what he wanted, as a small child throwing a tantrum. I could not risk so many lives, and I did not want to kill my own friends.\n\n'I had to play it sly, and I made it so my friends would not feel pain. Telepathically I warned them of the situation, and to scream but they would not feel pain and to feign their deaths. Chaos was not smart enough to keep a constant check on them, too easily amused with his toys and twisted thoughts. And the plan seemed to be working, though my distress was still the same. It is not easy to see your friends being ripped and mutilated slowly, repeatedly.\n\n'Chaos became very annoyed, and then angered when he realized his plot was not working, that his game was a boring one. Instead, he released my friends, however he created something worse. We had to willingly fight one another to the death. He would force me to kill my friends one by one in battle, otherwise he would destroy several star systems. I became enraged offering my own life to spare this kind of pointless destruction. My friends, brave as they were, did not want many lives to be taken and would offer themselves up as sacrifice. Chaos would not appeal to their desires in full, he stated that if they sacrifice himself, he would still kill the other worlds and galaxies. Even worse, he was not going to allow my friends to do it.\n\n'My first friend, he warped and turned into a monster of chaos. That fiend made my friend into a giant doll, painted with a giant happy face, as his style, always so childish. The doll would attack me and even hold some power directly from Chaos. Now he was angry, channeling himself into my friends. He knew I would easily sacrifice myself, though he wanted me to kill them, and i refused to play this sick and twisted game with him.\n\n'They others were willing to die, though now I had a time limit. With this friend of mine now shifted and altered into a chaos beast, they were being warped and changed. In order to save them, I had to kill them before they could be completely altered. But Chaos was channeling himself into them, giving them power to rival that of my own, he would not make this easy for me. This meant he was going to force me to be aggressive. It wasnt bad enough that I had to kill him, he wanted me to slaughter then in an aggressive fashion, and that is what I did with my first friend. I was forced in battle to rip him to shreds.\n\n'The other gods did not appear to my telepathic appeal, thinking Chaos was playing another one of his games, but prepared themselves if he did make his threats of destroying systems true.\n\n'My next friend did not have control of his body, he knew he was to be sacrificed, though what he did not know, is Chaos was taking their souls. Worse with my second friend Chaos made him immortal, forcing me to kill him over and over, slowly changing him into a chaos beast forcing me to go faster and faster with my slaughter.\n\n\"The third he tried to play with my mind. Taking control of their voice and body, making them cry out in pain and beg me to stop hurting them, reading their mind so he could bring up fond memories. She too, was made immortal and slowly shifting into a chaos beast. I knew this and tried to appear as heartless as I could appear, though deep down inside it was killing me, I was wanting to stop, I couldnt do it, I didnt want to do it, these were my friends, friends dont do this to one another and I was put in a position to try and stop this. The other gods refused to come to my aide, and I couldnt call his bluff, not with Chaos. To call his bluff would mean for certain he would make good on his threats, this was not the first time he tried to create a final apocalypse.\n\n'Once he had his fill with this friend, she was laid to rest, though her soul went to Chaos. I pleaded for him to just take me and stop this madness, that he was going too far. He only laughed, doing a dance to mock me, stating he has not even begun to be chaotic and he had developed worse plots for future use. I went out to attack Chaos, he held the souls captive, once more forcing me to play. And I had to think fast how to beat him at his game. He was trying for a win win scenario for himself. I go insane with grief slaughtering my own friends, or I shift into my second half.\n\n'My forth friend, Chaos kept in constant pain, the kind of pain that strikes the soul, crippling any, even the souls in hell. Once more immortal, my friend screamed, no control over his body, constantly in pain demanding i end his life, but Chaos kept him immortal, replenishing his body over and over, keeping him alive and in constant pain, trying to make me kill him faster and faster and faster, trying to push me against my morals of merciful killings. He wanted to make a hippocrate of me, angered from my past victories, he wanted to destroy my own divinity and name. He was pushing me to a point that I was going to have to do something I rarely do and he forgot we can do. But if I did, I could face judgement to the gods of creation for disobeying.\n\n'He then grew bored of it, realizing that I was not falling for it, and he made his final demands. He brought out the fifth of my friends, the final one remaining. She was frightened, after seeing what I had did to the others and knowing Chaos would alter her to be tortured. But no, Chaos insisted that I would have to give her constant torture and pain, he would not do it, and I had to do it. Otherwise he would keep his threats. But then he added a twist, in order to scorn my reputation and even cost me my divinity, he demanded that I eat my forth friend in order for his suffering to stop.\n\nI was taken back, and was refusing. Though the more I refused, my fifth friend started to scream out in more pain, slowly changing, pressuring me more and more. Then he made a final insult. In order to save her, my fifth friend of the group, I had...I can barely get myself to think of it. I had, I had to defecate on my forth friend, urinate on him, rape her, and then eat the forth friend with all of the waste matter upon him. I was pushed to a limit, I would not do that, that was far against my constitutions, but he was strict.\n\n'Chaos was not wicked. He was no evil. His intentions were not sick or twisted, he carefully plotted to do it. Not because he enjoyed it. No he hated such disgusting actions, rather his purpose was to break me, to force me to do something highly against my will and even after doing such things, he pushed more and more, and not just to test me, rather with the intention to break me. If I did not do those disgusting vulgar things, then he wanted me to go down that dark road again and have my emotions over take me again released the other dragon. It was highly sinful, to do so would be blasphemus and he would be costing me my own divinity and possibly his eternity with the gods of creation.\n\n'I could not leave my friends suffer, i could not stand to kill them. I was angry, I was feeling powerless. This was senseless, this was pointless, all because Chaos had a biff with me. To hold such responsibilities, the suffering of a few for the sake of far more. I would prefer there be no suffering. He was not insane, he was enjoying the suffering in the sense of the chaos it was causing, not even caring of his own eternal fate. I had to stop this, I had to stop the pain. I was in tears when I made a final plea to him. Battered and beaten, I looked up to him with tears and cried out \"Stop the pain! Stop it!\" He could only laugh, pressing me to make him, implying I should go down the dark road.\n\n'I was left to take a chance, breaking an order. It was my only option. I did not care what had happened to me, I would gladly take the punishment so long it could save them from the cruelty of Chaos, to save the systems. Chaos did not think I would do this option, no one dares to question the orders of the gods of creation. I had to be fast to do this and I had to over power him. I tensed up my body, and started to scream in frustration; he seemed to be enjoying it thinking I was to released the other dragon.\n\n'Instead, I rushed him, using as much power as I had, transforming very quickly to my divine state. This caught him off guard as I figured, and in this brief moment, i took the two of us to a sub realm, away from reality. I had the souls of my other friends to collect, and now that we were in a subrealm, we could battle and I would not have to worry about him harming the other worlds.\n\n'Chaos became enraged, he had not expected me to shift so casually as we are forbidden to enter these forms unless there is a threat big enough that we must access that much amount of power. I felt it wrong, but in my head I knew that I couldnt roll over and submit and meet such degrading actions. I have stated my own soul with his requests, and I will not do it further while the others suffer.\n\n'My actions caught the attention of the other gods whom were quick to find me. Often when we feel one of us shift to this form, we act to help. Something big is going on and they felt something bad was happening. They watched as I battled Chaos, who would not dare enter his own divine state to fight me, though laughed at the action. He felt my actions have ruined my divinity. He thought he had won to some degree, feeling I would be punished for disobeying. I reclaimed the souls he had taken and the other gods kept an eye out on Chaos, knowing it was he who pushed me to transform like this.\n\n'However, because of my transformation and the actions of Chaos, the god of death felt to judge the souls and keep them in the realm of the dead. They had suffered enough by our actions and I no longer had a say in their fate. They would be judged as he saw fit. I was shattered. I had done so much to save my friends, and to even be restricted from apologizing for my actions, that was hard.\n\n'This whole issue with Chaos has stained my soul, I carry the guilt even to this day. I hated doing that, I hated it so much and it makes me cry every time when I think about it. This was the worst case of me killing my friends, because I did it repeatedly.\n\n\n'Then there are cases in my life, where I did dark actions. The case of my second half. At a point before the great extinction, I felt that in order to be true to my title, i should remove all hate from my being. But being divine, doing such a thing created a second dragon. Exactly like me in knowledge, though the appearance was different. This became the god of hate. Never accepted as a god by the others, he still had the same divine powers as myself, though created a lot of hate. He would cause a lot of tension and do things not out of evil or self pleasure, but only to cause hate. We had the same morals, where i did not like to murder, he hated to murder and only killed when it would cause a lot of hate. He would not execute a friend, however he would kill someone to cause hate if hate would present itself. He would answer prays of hate, giving wrath and revenge to those hated. And he was left unchecked for a long time.\n\n'I eventually confronted this half of mine upon a planet. The guardian of the zone of silence came with me, stating that a lot of souls would be lost in this fight and with two powerful figures as ourselves, he himself had to collect the souls. I asked for his help, he stated he would only answer to his master. I understood, and I asked that my form of help would be for him to take as many souls away as possible, to protect their lives if possible against our fallout.\n\n'We shared a few words, he refused to leave, and engaged me in battle. Though being as powerful, he quickly transformed into his battle state, causing me to do the same. This is where half the planet was destroyed and i lead him out into space. He followed, but to spite me, he destroyed the local star, freezing the rest of the survivors before the guardian could get them out of there.\n\n'The battle lead into a subrealm once he transformed into his divine state and I did my best to keep it secluded there. Beating this dragon would not stop him. He was as myself and could not be defeated that easily. I realized the only way to defeat hate was with love, to control it with love. I managed to get him to submit in battle briefly and reabsorbed him into my body and being. There, I could control him, but I needed to outpour my emotions more to do it. I needed to stop bottling up my emotions, and being more open and sensitive.\n\n'This action made me more of an outcast with the others. It was my responsibility and I failed. And I was a target of ridicule and anger from the others. Even to this day, i am regarded as less then the others. Not only for this event, but also my interactions with mortals.\n\n'Then came the extinction order ages later. We were all ordered to kill and execute all members of this tribe or all those who would use their methods. That was a dark time in my life. Anytime I would see one, i had to kill one. I had to do battle with their twisted creations, such a high insult to us. I had to execute so many. And they feared us all.\n\n'Many pleaded, many ran away in terror, and many fought us. All had to die. Children, elderly, so many. To kill a child, seeing the look of terror on their face, was something I could not do. But my associate did before me. This child was innocent. Being a target for what they were, they had not committed crimes, but had to suffer due to the crimes of their parents.\n\n'At first things did not start this way. Back then they stated to do away with the gods and create their own gods, then succeeded in creating abominations. No one but the gods of creation could create life. My associate felt that we send them terrors int he forms of plagues. That their flesh will rot while they are standing on their feet, their eyes would rot in their sockets, and their tongues would rot inside their mouths for the blasphemies they spoke against us. They would suffer, they would starve, and they would thirst. But they waged war against us, using their abominations to wage battles against us and save them from the plagues we cast down upon them.\n\n'And then we went to war with them, and the killing started. More and more hate towards us, we seemed the villains for the slaughter of the innocent we committed. And then because we did this, they took a final step of action against us, creating an abomination powerful enough to rival us, and they succeeded. This entity killed many of us, and nearly killed me if it was not for our champion.\n\n'The clan did thin out and no longer makes trouble, but the order remains. If I see a member of this clan, I am to kill them on the spot.\n\n\n'So I sit here in the forest, reflecting upon some of these dark thoughts in my life. I'm tired. So tired of such drama and pointless killing. I dont want to kill, and sometimes I have too. To feel that isolated feeling inside, that deep sorrow reach up to you over and over, submerging you in icy tears for the loss of life, is too much. I am very sad that I must kill at times. But also it angers me that I am treated so disrespectfully as a god of love. Such as the case with the clan, how dare they do such a thing to us? Then have the nerve to take arms against us instead of reasoning things out.\n\n'I come to secluded spots at times, over and over to think and reflect upon my own life. Just a place where I can think about the killings I have done in my past. I have long since made reparations, but I feel it is too much a price to pay. I'm tired of it all. I wonder if the price of this divinity is indeed too high. I say yes since one soul is too much to pay, but the answer is no because of the amount of souls that would be saved upon myself sacrificing my morals for them. I do love them all, and wish to save as many as I can, since not all wish to be saved.\n\n'I am tired of executing and killing though. It hurts me greatly.\"\n\n\n\nThank you Kagisnad for such a wonderful commission that captures this mood and feeling of Duo.",
  "description_bbcode_parsed": "<span style='word-wrap: break-word;'>A fantastic commission done by Kagisnad <a href=\"https://www.furaffinity.net/user/kagisnad/\" rel=\"nofollow\">https://www.furaffinity.net/user/kagisnad/</a><br /><br />Original here: <a href=\"https://www.furaffinity.net/view/13024100/\" rel=\"nofollow\">https://www.furaffinity.net/view/13024100/</a><br /><br /><br />Duo sitting in the woods, burnt out, reflecting on his life. A companion piece to Birthday-Forgotten Cemetery in which there he reflected upon the death of a close friend. Here he is reflecting upon other things of that dark nature. Kagisnad captured the mood of Duo great. He looks annoyed, burnt out, and sad all at once, you can see it in the eyes. Expect a long description ahead.<br /><br /><br /><br />&quot;The price of my divinity. Is it too high? I often ask myself this question and feel my answer should be a yes. One life to be taken is always too much of a price to ask. I am very tired of having to kill my friends, to have to watch them in their final moments, some even giving me that split second look of shock; their eyes screaming &#039;why?&#039;<br /><br />&#039;I have had to destroy planets, punish groups for what they have done against us. I am used to doing this, and I do so with a heavy heart, as a father would punish a child. It is for the better so they learn, but that goes as far as punishment, when it comes to killing and destruction, that is difficult for me, though I have to have the ability to do so without a second thought. Any hesitation could be enough time for more to be hurt.<br /><br />&#039;I always try to avoid that kind of situation. I do my best to avoid it, and sadly, I am unable to for the most of the time. My first war was something that could not be avoided. It was a small war by our standards, and so many lives were lost. I knew their fate, but I did not like to see their period of life here cut short, and in such a horrible manor. Many of the killed wished to die of old age, feeling they were not going to die that day. I could not take it, I do not like going to war, leading my army into battle to slaughter. A reason why I am glad to have Akila, who commands my armies and is able to tolerate such devastation. But that only concerns war, not extinction.<br /><br />&#039;During that horrible time of my divinity known as the great extinction, when that wretch of an entity set out to destroy us, so much life was lost, so many innocence corrupted. The biggest insult we have ever faced; making us feel helpless in our own divinity and dominion. Even in this dark time, I had to kill the innocence, and those innocent that I had to kill were my close friends. My little friends, the jibblies and the malikai. Both were there for me in the past, always there, I even chose to make my first palace so I could be with them. But they were so small, so innocent, so loving. I loved them so much, so much. But I could not bare the thought of them being corrupted and eternally damned, and the choice came to me that the only method of salvation for them before this great wickedness came upon their world, was to kill them before their souls could be corrupted.<br /><br />&#039;First, were my dear friends the malikai. My dear sweet friend Milar, whom was a member of this species, understood what I had to do, but it was very troubling for him to accept. He would be spared from this fate as his role in the greater battle was needed. The death of the malikai, I chose to be subtle, calm, peaceful. I took all their lives in their sleep and I personally delivered them to salvation. Those souls, shocked at my action, knew whom I was and trusted that I did what was best for them, and they were fine. They knew their time was over, but the pain it caused me was awful. These were the people who first loved me.<br /><br />&#039;Second were the jibblies, a tribe that helped out the malikai. They, sadly, had to be dealt with quickly. I was going to give them the same painless sleeping death, though the wickedness had made itself know, and there was little time to react, little time to create an escape. They understood the situation, and they were brave. This, I hesitated. I had never tried to force myself to kill such a large group at once, especially a group I treasured dearly. In my youth, I was a trained to be in my home worlds army, I knew that you have to be fast, but they never trained us for a slaughter of this scale. With a single wave of my hand, I sent out a ray of death, beaming in light and just as fast, going to each jibblie one by one. Their faces, illuminated and frozen in shock and horror. It was ugly. Horrible. To see such pain, though be it a single instant; to see the faces of those you loved and whom loved you, frozen with that shock, twisted with the agony of the final suffering, knowing you are the one to cause their deaths, this suffering. That is a very deep and tearful feeling, and I have always hated it. I still tear up today thinking about it, but their fate was sealed and saved. They went on to paradise and were not taken to be damned.&#039;<br /><br />&#039;An age or so passed before I had to do such actions again. A planet that I had direct influence on, were not obeying me. They had corrupted and murdered their world with pollution. They feared death from creating gases to choke the planet so much that they removed such pollutions from their world, and in turn created a worse nightmare. Vegetation grew quickly, creating too much air, and the planet became hotter and hotter. They were frightened but I had to watch them. I told them to keep faith, I told them to pray, I told them to ask. The few who did, were not enough, they wanted action now and environmental activists set out a plot to conquer a neighboring world.<br /><br />&#039;They created death charges and weapons to go and take this world, and I begged them to pray and ask, and they still refused to do so. They wanted to take fate into their own hands; they wanted to take care of themselves and refused my help. The few who did trust me, they were rewarded afterwards. I made sure their fate, be it grim, was a mode of escape before my final judgement came. The other gods felt i should impose my wrath upon them, that I should bring plagues and destruction so they can cry out in fear to pray for mercy. I disagreed, because the action would only cause them to do so out of fear, and not by their own will. I did not wish them to cause or create war, and i sent some angels of mine to give a final warning. They did not listen, and now judgement was here.<br /><br />&#039;I myself appeared to the world and told them that they have not kept to my order and divine will, they would instead choose to take the lives of another world by force. They had the option of accepting their fate with humility, they had the option to keep prayers and keep hope alive, to ask me and acknowledge their own faults. They had so much pride, thinking they could fix it themselves by taking another world and forgotten about me with the years. I gave them signs, they made excuses to ignore, even being there in person they chose to ignore and dismiss me as something else. And then I gave them their demise. They so feared being burned that they would slaughter the innocent of another world to escape such a fate, that I burned them worse. I did not have the intention to torture, but the method of death was the one they feared the most, and they all knew their mistakes.<br /><br />&#039;More time passed, and more judgements on worlds, more punishments to my angels for betrayals. But it was always those whom were my friends that I had to kill that pained me the most. One of which was Weavian, I believe that is how you pronounce his name in this tongue. He and i remained friends for many ages, hundreds and hundreds of years, maybe a couple of thousand. He was always happy and we would take trips and journey together to various worlds, having lots of fun with the locals, being silly, fun, and just having things out together. But being a god of love, there were things I had to defend, and he had a big issue with himself that I could reflect upon. He could not find a love.<br /><br />&#039;Weavian would get to the point to be married to someone, and often, they would die or leave before their marriage. He would ask me to help, and I often would, setting him up with the right people he could get along with the most, and yet this still happened. With time I learned he was beating them, hurting them. I am not the kind of dragon to peer into anothers mind without permission, it is disrespectful. In this case, I should have. He was abusing the women, sometimes his rage would kill them.<br /><br />&#039;I demanded he stop this action, he was doing a great injustice. His final would be mate fled to me for protection and this changed him. He took arms against me and I subdued him. I said I would not kill him and he is acting the fool. I could alter the chemicals in his body to get him level again, he refused, feeling I would change him and take his love away. And he tried to come at me again, and then she, in her ignorance, came to my aid, forgetting of my divinity, and she was stabbed. Weavian was devastated, and seeing me hold his bloodied bride caused him to jump out the window and escape, driving him mad. I revived his beloved and set out to find my friend, to help him, but he continued to distance himself from me, stating I was the one who caused him this pain, putting the blame on me.<br /><br />&#039;He was mad. Eventually making dark deals to set up devices to slaughter innocence just to get my attention. I asked him not to do this, not to set them off. I had the power to stop him easily, I could easily remove the devices, he had to submit to me. But he refused, stating he would have to kill me. I made a final plea and his answer was he would not have his allies slaughter upon his death, if I fought him as a mortal. I agreed, and altered myself to a form I nearly forgotten. And we fought by sword, a mode i was not too familiar with, but in the end, it was up to me to take his head. He dared me to do it, and i refused, telling him I was done killing friends. I dropped the sword, turned my back, and returned to my love form. This was not enough for him, he would accept my generosity, and threatened to kill a city. I could sense the presence of reapers, meaning if they were slain, I would be unable to bring them back, the god of death in this area, Viscero, made it clear that if they died, i would have no part in having them returned. I had no choice, I turned to face him again, stated I did not want to kill him, pleading that he not force me to kill him. He was angry and charged me, stabbing me in the stomach, but I grabbed him by the throat, clenching. I watched him mad as a dog, slandering against me at my face, holding his throat feeling the life leave his body, watching as his anger and hatred remained with him until the end. Then i let his corpse fall to the ground, and left his soul to the reapers. I was done with this and wanted to be on my own.<br /><br />&#039;Ive had to kill so many of my friends in my life. Sometimes I had to be harsh, others I was merciful. In one case, another friend turned violent, and made a deal with humans. Gaining hold of technology that could give him power to rival that of our own. He challenged me to a fight, holding a world hostage like a mad doomsdayer. We fought, I humored him, and though he was my friend, his point was becoming clear to those around him. He wanted to show that there was no need for us, that we have no true power and they were believing. I could not allow him to win, it was against our will, I could easily crush him, but was trying to reason with him, and then his pride set in. I decided I had no choice but to send a message to all of them. He attacked again and I started using more of my power, and I slowly, piece by piece, dismantled his device as well as disarming his device. They had forgotten that we control the cosmos, that a mere machine could never rival us. And he crawled in fear, fear of his life, and then he stood. An associate in the crowd tossed him a bomb able to blow up the planet, a crude back up plan. I shot a beam from my eyes, zapping my friend to instant death. I took the device and left the world to be punished by famine until they understood their mistake and repented. Though my friend was now gone and I did my own privet mourning for his soul.<br /><br />&#039;The worst case I have encountered for killing my friend, came because of that fiend Chaos. The god of chaos, Chaos thusly named himself Chaos since no one else could do it like him. He has always targeted me in the past to play his games, belittling my nudity at one point by taking my penis away and hiding it. I could create a new one, though that fiend had hostages in certain areas of his game forcing me to play. Chaos would often do these kinds of games in different forms, always holding souls captive. Not just to me either.<br /><br />&#039;In this case, I had five friends from different tribes and worlds. Chaos one day took them away, wanting to play another twisted game. Though this one was to satisfy a curiosity he had about myself. Chaos wanted to know what it could take to either break me, or for me to shift into my other self. He implied he would make my actions decide how each friend was to die, and that they would all die. Something sick and twisted of him. I could easily revive them, the gods of death detested chaos very much, but he was also a god. He could take the souls for himself and keep them in eternal chaos, doing as he willed with them, shifting them into strange objects, threatening to even leave them to be taken by demon reapers to hell.<br /><br />&#039;I was supposed to decide how they would be tortured and killed. The longer the deaths, the more satisfied he would be. I refused to involve myself in his gambit, that if he harmed them that I would annihilate him. He laughed, stating if I did not play he would send more galaxies into chaos. He would continue to torment too many innocent souls until I would snap and released the dark dragon again. He enjoyed the dark dragon, it caused a lot of havoc that he relished in the chaos. I warned the other gods would not stand for it and he only laughed, pointing out their retaliation against him would only cause more chaos and death, that this time he was willing to go to that extreme to get what he wanted, as a small child throwing a tantrum. I could not risk so many lives, and I did not want to kill my own friends.<br /><br />&#039;I had to play it sly, and I made it so my friends would not feel pain. Telepathically I warned them of the situation, and to scream but they would not feel pain and to feign their deaths. Chaos was not smart enough to keep a constant check on them, too easily amused with his toys and twisted thoughts. And the plan seemed to be working, though my distress was still the same. It is not easy to see your friends being ripped and mutilated slowly, repeatedly.<br /><br />&#039;Chaos became very annoyed, and then angered when he realized his plot was not working, that his game was a boring one. Instead, he released my friends, however he created something worse. We had to willingly fight one another to the death. He would force me to kill my friends one by one in battle, otherwise he would destroy several star systems. I became enraged offering my own life to spare this kind of pointless destruction. My friends, brave as they were, did not want many lives to be taken and would offer themselves up as sacrifice. Chaos would not appeal to their desires in full, he stated that if they sacrifice himself, he would still kill the other worlds and galaxies. Even worse, he was not going to allow my friends to do it.<br /><br />&#039;My first friend, he warped and turned into a monster of chaos. That fiend made my friend into a giant doll, painted with a giant happy face, as his style, always so childish. The doll would attack me and even hold some power directly from Chaos. Now he was angry, channeling himself into my friends. He knew I would easily sacrifice myself, though he wanted me to kill them, and i refused to play this sick and twisted game with him.<br /><br />&#039;They others were willing to die, though now I had a time limit. With this friend of mine now shifted and altered into a chaos beast, they were being warped and changed. In order to save them, I had to kill them before they could be completely altered. But Chaos was channeling himself into them, giving them power to rival that of my own, he would not make this easy for me. This meant he was going to force me to be aggressive. It wasnt bad enough that I had to kill him, he wanted me to slaughter then in an aggressive fashion, and that is what I did with my first friend. I was forced in battle to rip him to shreds.<br /><br />&#039;The other gods did not appear to my telepathic appeal, thinking Chaos was playing another one of his games, but prepared themselves if he did make his threats of destroying systems true.<br /><br />&#039;My next friend did not have control of his body, he knew he was to be sacrificed, though what he did not know, is Chaos was taking their souls. Worse with my second friend Chaos made him immortal, forcing me to kill him over and over, slowly changing him into a chaos beast forcing me to go faster and faster with my slaughter.<br /><br />&quot;The third he tried to play with my mind. Taking control of their voice and body, making them cry out in pain and beg me to stop hurting them, reading their mind so he could bring up fond memories. She too, was made immortal and slowly shifting into a chaos beast. I knew this and tried to appear as heartless as I could appear, though deep down inside it was killing me, I was wanting to stop, I couldnt do it, I didnt want to do it, these were my friends, friends dont do this to one another and I was put in a position to try and stop this. The other gods refused to come to my aide, and I couldnt call his bluff, not with Chaos. To call his bluff would mean for certain he would make good on his threats, this was not the first time he tried to create a final apocalypse.<br /><br />&#039;Once he had his fill with this friend, she was laid to rest, though her soul went to Chaos. I pleaded for him to just take me and stop this madness, that he was going too far. He only laughed, doing a dance to mock me, stating he has not even begun to be chaotic and he had developed worse plots for future use. I went out to attack Chaos, he held the souls captive, once more forcing me to play. And I had to think fast how to beat him at his game. He was trying for a win win scenario for himself. I go insane with grief slaughtering my own friends, or I shift into my second half.<br /><br />&#039;My forth friend, Chaos kept in constant pain, the kind of pain that strikes the soul, crippling any, even the souls in hell. Once more immortal, my friend screamed, no control over his body, constantly in pain demanding i end his life, but Chaos kept him immortal, replenishing his body over and over, keeping him alive and in constant pain, trying to make me kill him faster and faster and faster, trying to push me against my morals of merciful killings. He wanted to make a hippocrate of me, angered from my past victories, he wanted to destroy my own divinity and name. He was pushing me to a point that I was going to have to do something I rarely do and he forgot we can do. But if I did, I could face judgement to the gods of creation for disobeying.<br /><br />&#039;He then grew bored of it, realizing that I was not falling for it, and he made his final demands. He brought out the fifth of my friends, the final one remaining. She was frightened, after seeing what I had did to the others and knowing Chaos would alter her to be tortured. But no, Chaos insisted that I would have to give her constant torture and pain, he would not do it, and I had to do it. Otherwise he would keep his threats. But then he added a twist, in order to scorn my reputation and even cost me my divinity, he demanded that I eat my forth friend in order for his suffering to stop.<br /><br />I was taken back, and was refusing. Though the more I refused, my fifth friend started to scream out in more pain, slowly changing, pressuring me more and more. Then he made a final insult. In order to save her, my fifth friend of the group, I had...I can barely get myself to think of it. I had, I had to defecate on my forth friend, urinate on him, rape her, and then eat the forth friend with all of the waste matter upon him. I was pushed to a limit, I would not do that, that was far against my constitutions, but he was strict.<br /><br />&#039;Chaos was not wicked. He was no evil. His intentions were not sick or twisted, he carefully plotted to do it. Not because he enjoyed it. No he hated such disgusting actions, rather his purpose was to break me, to force me to do something highly against my will and even after doing such things, he pushed more and more, and not just to test me, rather with the intention to break me. If I did not do those disgusting vulgar things, then he wanted me to go down that dark road again and have my emotions over take me again released the other dragon. It was highly sinful, to do so would be blasphemus and he would be costing me my own divinity and possibly his eternity with the gods of creation.<br /><br />&#039;I could not leave my friends suffer, i could not stand to kill them. I was angry, I was feeling powerless. This was senseless, this was pointless, all because Chaos had a biff with me. To hold such responsibilities, the suffering of a few for the sake of far more. I would prefer there be no suffering. He was not insane, he was enjoying the suffering in the sense of the chaos it was causing, not even caring of his own eternal fate. I had to stop this, I had to stop the pain. I was in tears when I made a final plea to him. Battered and beaten, I looked up to him with tears and cried out &quot;Stop the pain! Stop it!&quot; He could only laugh, pressing me to make him, implying I should go down the dark road.<br /><br />&#039;I was left to take a chance, breaking an order. It was my only option. I did not care what had happened to me, I would gladly take the punishment so long it could save them from the cruelty of Chaos, to save the systems. Chaos did not think I would do this option, no one dares to question the orders of the gods of creation. I had to be fast to do this and I had to over power him. I tensed up my body, and started to scream in frustration; he seemed to be enjoying it thinking I was to released the other dragon.<br /><br />&#039;Instead, I rushed him, using as much power as I had, transforming very quickly to my divine state. This caught him off guard as I figured, and in this brief moment, i took the two of us to a sub realm, away from reality. I had the souls of my other friends to collect, and now that we were in a subrealm, we could battle and I would not have to worry about him harming the other worlds.<br /><br />&#039;Chaos became enraged, he had not expected me to shift so casually as we are forbidden to enter these forms unless there is a threat big enough that we must access that much amount of power. I felt it wrong, but in my head I knew that I couldnt roll over and submit and meet such degrading actions. I have stated my own soul with his requests, and I will not do it further while the others suffer.<br /><br />&#039;My actions caught the attention of the other gods whom were quick to find me. Often when we feel one of us shift to this form, we act to help. Something big is going on and they felt something bad was happening. They watched as I battled Chaos, who would not dare enter his own divine state to fight me, though laughed at the action. He felt my actions have ruined my divinity. He thought he had won to some degree, feeling I would be punished for disobeying. I reclaimed the souls he had taken and the other gods kept an eye out on Chaos, knowing it was he who pushed me to transform like this.<br /><br />&#039;However, because of my transformation and the actions of Chaos, the god of death felt to judge the souls and keep them in the realm of the dead. They had suffered enough by our actions and I no longer had a say in their fate. They would be judged as he saw fit. I was shattered. I had done so much to save my friends, and to even be restricted from apologizing for my actions, that was hard.<br /><br />&#039;This whole issue with Chaos has stained my soul, I carry the guilt even to this day. I hated doing that, I hated it so much and it makes me cry every time when I think about it. This was the worst case of me killing my friends, because I did it repeatedly.<br /><br /><br />&#039;Then there are cases in my life, where I did dark actions. The case of my second half. At a point before the great extinction, I felt that in order to be true to my title, i should remove all hate from my being. But being divine, doing such a thing created a second dragon. Exactly like me in knowledge, though the appearance was different. This became the god of hate. Never accepted as a god by the others, he still had the same divine powers as myself, though created a lot of hate. He would cause a lot of tension and do things not out of evil or self pleasure, but only to cause hate. We had the same morals, where i did not like to murder, he hated to murder and only killed when it would cause a lot of hate. He would not execute a friend, however he would kill someone to cause hate if hate would present itself. He would answer prays of hate, giving wrath and revenge to those hated. And he was left unchecked for a long time.<br /><br />&#039;I eventually confronted this half of mine upon a planet. The guardian of the zone of silence came with me, stating that a lot of souls would be lost in this fight and with two powerful figures as ourselves, he himself had to collect the souls. I asked for his help, he stated he would only answer to his master. I understood, and I asked that my form of help would be for him to take as many souls away as possible, to protect their lives if possible against our fallout.<br /><br />&#039;We shared a few words, he refused to leave, and engaged me in battle. Though being as powerful, he quickly transformed into his battle state, causing me to do the same. This is where half the planet was destroyed and i lead him out into space. He followed, but to spite me, he destroyed the local star, freezing the rest of the survivors before the guardian could get them out of there.<br /><br />&#039;The battle lead into a subrealm once he transformed into his divine state and I did my best to keep it secluded there. Beating this dragon would not stop him. He was as myself and could not be defeated that easily. I realized the only way to defeat hate was with love, to control it with love. I managed to get him to submit in battle briefly and reabsorbed him into my body and being. There, I could control him, but I needed to outpour my emotions more to do it. I needed to stop bottling up my emotions, and being more open and sensitive.<br /><br />&#039;This action made me more of an outcast with the others. It was my responsibility and I failed. And I was a target of ridicule and anger from the others. Even to this day, i am regarded as less then the others. Not only for this event, but also my interactions with mortals.<br /><br />&#039;Then came the extinction order ages later. We were all ordered to kill and execute all members of this tribe or all those who would use their methods. That was a dark time in my life. Anytime I would see one, i had to kill one. I had to do battle with their twisted creations, such a high insult to us. I had to execute so many. And they feared us all.<br /><br />&#039;Many pleaded, many ran away in terror, and many fought us. All had to die. Children, elderly, so many. To kill a child, seeing the look of terror on their face, was something I could not do. But my associate did before me. This child was innocent. Being a target for what they were, they had not committed crimes, but had to suffer due to the crimes of their parents.<br /><br />&#039;At first things did not start this way. Back then they stated to do away with the gods and create their own gods, then succeeded in creating abominations. No one but the gods of creation could create life. My associate felt that we send them terrors int he forms of plagues. That their flesh will rot while they are standing on their feet, their eyes would rot in their sockets, and their tongues would rot inside their mouths for the blasphemies they spoke against us. They would suffer, they would starve, and they would thirst. But they waged war against us, using their abominations to wage battles against us and save them from the plagues we cast down upon them.<br /><br />&#039;And then we went to war with them, and the killing started. More and more hate towards us, we seemed the villains for the slaughter of the innocent we committed. And then because we did this, they took a final step of action against us, creating an abomination powerful enough to rival us, and they succeeded. This entity killed many of us, and nearly killed me if it was not for our champion.<br /><br />&#039;The clan did thin out and no longer makes trouble, but the order remains. If I see a member of this clan, I am to kill them on the spot.<br /><br /><br />&#039;So I sit here in the forest, reflecting upon some of these dark thoughts in my life. I&#039;m tired. So tired of such drama and pointless killing. I dont want to kill, and sometimes I have too. To feel that isolated feeling inside, that deep sorrow reach up to you over and over, submerging you in icy tears for the loss of life, is too much. I am very sad that I must kill at times. But also it angers me that I am treated so disrespectfully as a god of love. Such as the case with the clan, how dare they do such a thing to us? Then have the nerve to take arms against us instead of reasoning things out.<br /><br />&#039;I come to secluded spots at times, over and over to think and reflect upon my own life. Just a place where I can think about the killings I have done in my past. I have long since made reparations, but I feel it is too much a price to pay. I&#039;m tired of it all. I wonder if the price of this divinity is indeed too high. I say yes since one soul is too much to pay, but the answer is no because of the amount of souls that would be saved upon myself sacrificing my morals for them. I do love them all, and wish to save as many as I can, since not all wish to be saved.<br /><br />&#039;I am tired of executing and killing though. It hurts me greatly.&quot;<br /><br /><br /><br />Thank you Kagisnad for such a wonderful commission that captures this mood and feeling of Duo.</span>",
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