A week has passed since Laius's promise to his son. Laius kept himself busy by cooking and cleaning the house while his kids played video games and toys. Apius particularly liked playing a game involving a house, dolls and other figurings. Caetia wanted to do anything her big brother did so she would join him all the time. Caetia didn't understand the purpose of personal space, her nature was of an incredibly clingy attachment of her family. Laius could never figure out why she never liked other kids, always shaking her head saying that she didn't like them and her reasoning was because they weren't family. Alnia when she was still with them would try to get her to play with other kids, but was always met with harsh criticisms of Caetia and her lack of discipline. She once threw a block at a kid just because he wanted to be her friend. She was unruly and uncooperative with the caretakers unless they were family. Yet despite this she liked Crius, Laverna and Fidius and particularly Papa Thax who is her godfather. Apius was more social with other people in comparison. But his introverted nature wanted him to be inside with family more than hanging out with random kids or 'friends'. One time when he was being picked up from school by Alnia some of his friends mocked and made fun of him when his little sister hugged and kissed Apius. They never let that down and eventually became bullies instead of being his friend. That didn't encourage Apius at all and left him not wanting to reach out to other kids since. A part of him wanted to blame his little sister for ruining his friendship, but he came to the conclusion that it wasn't her fault. His 'friends' were just jerks. When their mother died Apius and Caetia were naturally quite upset at the news. The night they slept together in Apius's bed they could hear their Dad crying loudly and making a lot of thumping sounds. Occasionally some officials would pop over and Dad would just be pleading and yelling a lot at them. Every time someone outside came inside their home they would talk to their Dad and there would always be crying and yelling. Neither Caetia nor Apius understood why and especially didn't know what was going on. Their Dad always kept their mother's death a secret in agonizing silence, when he wasn't crying that is. The only answer they have gotten was "Your mother is dead, the force isn't saying how and is hurting me more." Sometimes their grandparents would turn up, the first time they showed up after their mother's death both Caetia and Apius were excited to see them. That was the last them they were excited about seeing other relatives. From Apius and Caetia's point of view it looked like they only came over to make their Dad cry. Putting the blame of their mother's death on him and saying "We never wanted you two to marry and yet you did." Caetia especially didn't understand what was going on, but Apius understood enough. They blamed their Dad for their Mum dying. But he didn't know why they blamed him, only that the grandparents on both side of the family didn't want their Mum and Dad to be together.

Apius stopped playing dolls and house with his sister and laid down on his stomach on her floor in a sigh. Caetia took a bit to notice he stopped playing and laid down like him by his side.
"No more dolls Api?" She turned at him with a smile. Apius didn't respond and rested his head over his arms. "What's wrong Api?" Caetia started to poke Apius,
"Stop it." Apius said in a down mood. Caetia listened to her brother but then decided to lie on top of him and rested her head on his. "Please don't lie on me."
"Are you sad Api?" Caetia asked concerned.
"I think so. I can't stop thinking about mum." The room went silent with Caetia carefully wrapping her arms around Apius's neck.
"Now I feel sad."
"I'm sorry. I just really miss her."
"I do too." Caetia removed one arm out of under Apius's neck to rub her eye. "Do you want me to go?"
"No Cae, you can stay. I'm just sad and felt like being alone. I'm glad you're here." Caetia hugged her brother softly but firmly and remained on top of her big brother. Laius walked down the hallway and saw his kids planked on top of each other in dead silence.
"Hey, are you two ok?" He entered the room and sat on Caetia's bed.
"We miss Mum." Caetia said in a down mood. Laius wiped his mouth and nose and nodded slightly in response. "How did she die? Why did she die?" Laius didn't know what to say or how to say it. He felt tense and breathed deeply, he had to tell them all he knew.
"Truth is kids, I don't know. No one knows, except for the force she was in." He paused to recollect himself a bit, "And they won't tell me why. No one will tell us why." He sniffed and sat down next to his kids and rubbed Caetia's head. She and Apius looked up at their Dad, seeing him holding back his feelings. "I want to know what happened, but no one will tell me. They make it out as her fault, my fault. They won't even give us the her body out of decency so we can have a ceremony. To lay her to rest." Caetia got up off of Apius and hugged her Dad, trying not to cry.
"Is that really?" Apius asked in disbelief.
"I really wish I was lying, because then I might be a better father." Silence once again took control of the room. Laius rubbed the back of Caetia's head making her shift more and hugging tighter. Apius got up and joined in the group hug. It made more sense why his Dad was so broken since his mother died. He still didn't understand why his mum died and the whereabouts of her body. He wished to himself for so long that she is still alive but gone, but right now he wasn't sure. Laius breathed deeply and patted his kids on the back.

"We should watch a movie together, cuddle up with some drinks and snacks. Would that help you two?" Both Apius and Caetia nodded with tears and drained expression. Laius picked them both up getting Apius to grab onto Laius while he mostly held Caetia. Laius wasn't as strong and fit as he was before, but he made it an effort to carrying his kids at the least. As he was walking down the hallway to the living room Apius spoke up,
"Can we watch it in your room Dad?" Laius kept moving towards the living room, his mind was set on that room because he didn't want to be tempted by his kids in his room.
"I don't know about that. Daddy doesn't want to go against his promise." Apius patted his Dad's head and rubbed it slightly.
"But I want to be in your bed."
"Apius please. Daddy doesn't want to go against his promise. The two of you in his bed will make him-"
"Dad I believe in you." Laius thought that was so weird hearing that from his child. He stopped and looked at each of his kids. He shook his head firmly trying to remain strong.
"Believe me Apius, I want you two in my bed watching videos. But daddy will be tempted no matter how much he tries to resist. You two are too important for daddy to break his promise. Do you understand?" Apius huffed softly and nodded. "I'm sorry son." Laius sat them down in Apius's corner of the lounge. He went off to grab blankets and stuffed toys so they would be more comfortable. As he brought them back his kids were reaching for their toys and hugged them tightly, then leaning or settling in with each other.
"I'm hungry." Caetia spoke up. Laius sat next to them and took a deep breath to catch himself.
"What are you two feeling for?"
"Pizza."
"Pizza."
"Huh, I guess we're having pizza then. Same pizza as always?" Both kids nodded, Apius stretching back to turn on a temperature dial to cool the room down. "Ok. I'll order us some pizza. While we wait we can snuggle together and watch something." Caetia smiled a nodded quickly while Apius hugged his sister tightly. As Laius made the orders Caetia turned around in Apius's arms and used her toy to poke Apius on the nose. He rubbed it in response and repaid her with his toy. When Laius finished his order his kids moved away from each other to let their Dad in the middle.  They all huddled up with a remote at the ready and necessary equipment for comfort Laius turned something on the TV and kissed both his kids on the head. Both replied with 'I love you'. 

This is one of the things that Laius needed and wanted. A wholesome way for him to love his kids, to counter the unwholesomeness of before. Caetia would squeeze into her Dad and not watch the TV, still feeling tired from feeling sad from before. Apius did the same but was out of something else. He saw in his Dad trying to not break his promise but he saw in his self the problem. He couldn't help but blamed himself for his father's downfall. As he tugged his Dad's arm he looked at at him and muttered,
"Dad? I'm sorry."
"For what, Apius?" Laius looked at him in concern.
"It's my fault, isn't it?" Laius shook his head quickly in response, he couldn't help but really bad himself.
"Apius it's not your fault. It will never be your fault."
"But Dad, you like doing what you do to me and I don't like it."
"Apius. Don't blame yourself for not liking it. That's perfectly ok and I understand. Daddy is in the wrong, you aren't."
"But you're suffering." Laius hugged Apius's head and rubbed it softly. Apius held his father's arm in response.
"Apius, please. You aren't the problem, you will never be to problem. It will never be your fault. I'm suffering because I love you, my urges hurts you and I'm sorry about that. But Apius it will always be my fault and my fault alone. If you see my suffering it's because I'm doing it to myself because I love you and Caetia more than anything. So don't blame yourself, blame your father." Apius heard and understood his Dad, but he couldn't help but still feel bad.
"I still feel bad."
"I understand, Apius. This feeling will pass, just remember what I said. It's my fault." He let go of Apius's head, Apius nodded.
"It's your fault, but I love you Dad."
"I love the both of you so much. You two are the only things that make me wake up and be happy."
"You're a good monster!" Caetia spoke up, Laius turned to her and nodded with a slight smile.
"Exactly. Daddy is a good monster, and you two. You two are angels. If you two are ever at fault I'll say so. But you two haven't done anything wrong." He smiled at both of them, Caetia kept hugging into him tighter and tighter. Apius strangely felt relieved, like a strange weight was lifted off his shoulders. He wanted to feel bad but his Dad has reassured him. It wasn't his fault. Even so he didn't want to blame his Dad, but he didn't know who to blame. But he felt glad that his Dad didn't blame him.

The front door ringed, getting Laius to stand up to open it up. There stood Crius holding the pizzas with an apologetic smile.
"Hey Laius. Look I'm really sorry about before. I paid the delivery person so don't worry." Laius stood and stared blankly at him. He has been trying to forget that Crius told Thax about him and his kids, but he didn't have the heart to tell him to go away.  He gestured Crius to enter with the pizzas. "Hey kids."
"Uncle Crius!" The two kids exclaimed in surprised joy. The two of them came up to hug him. He handed the pizza boxes and then faced Laius who was looking tired and drained in the face.
"Laius can I talk with you for a bit?" Laius nodded slowly and faced his kids.
"I'll be back in a bit you two. Pause the episode please." 
"OK!" Caetia yelled back running back to the lounge with their box of pizza. They sat together opened it up and started sharing. Crius walked to the kitchen with Laius following. Crius rubbed the back of his head and sighed a few times before facing Laius once more.
"Laius I'm really sorry."
"You're sorry?" Laius lent up against a cabinet.
"Like really, really sorry. There's been a lot of things going on in my life and I've been concerned about you, your kids, and I have been concerned with Thax. So when he was giving me the drill sergent treatment and feeling frustrated I ran out of options."
"You just, had to tell him." Laius paused and wiped his forehead. "I thought you guys weren't going to tell anyone."
"Thax isn't an anyone. I just couldn't not tell him, he's their godfather. He would have found out later on and hell. I don't know what he would have done when he gets pissed." Crius paused to lean against the kitchen bench, Laius looked at him and sighed in defeat. He knew that Crius was right about that, he was so afraid when he turned up because of who Thax is. He really thought he was going to die that day, maybe Crius easing Thax into this knowledge saved his life. But he still felt betrayed. "Look, Laius. There is literally no one else that important to tell. If I didn't know Thax were your kid's godfather and our favourite teacher as well I would have never said anything. But look." He stood up from his leaning and grabbed something out of his pocket. "I will make amends for this and I assure you your secret is safe. None of the other two knows about what happened, I will eventually explain it all but I will make up for this. I'm really sorry Laius." He handed Laius some portable drives.
"What are these?" He looked at the 9 coloured drives, all labeled and in top condition. In fact these looked like they could put actual data banks and drives to shame. These were corporate level data insertable drives.
"I went and searched for every education class and course for the next several years for your kids." Laius looked at them and suddenly felt the wind taken out of him. "I know you were thinking of home schooling your kids now since, well, everything going on and I figure I could download and share all of the data to help you make sure your kids are smart. Math, science, law, xenolinguistics social studies. Hell it's got other weird classes like craft, music, various hand craft and sowing. I also got Thax's weapon and soldier suiting and instructions, I actually kept mine from our school days and figured having him involved will also help." Laius felt slightly overwhelmed. He was seriously thinking about this before, but he had been reconsidering it due to how bad he was feeling. "Right? I think I remember you wanting all this."
"I did. I just, don't know if I want it anymore. I don't want to destroy their lives anymore than I already am."
"Ask them. If they'd rather go to a normal school then let them. I just wanted to make up for what happened." Laius nodded and put them in his pocket. Crius came over and patted Laius on the shoulder, "And look, I'm going to make it my best effort to provide for you guys in the shadows. Laverna and Fidius also would contribute. If you guys need help, money, protection. We can provide that for you and your family. That's a promise from all of us." Laius embraced Crius and softly wept. Crius patted Laius on the back and told him he was ok. Laius pulled himself together after a minute.
"Thank you Crius."
"I still owe you a lot for the trouble. So it's no problem. I better get going, tonight I'll be meeting with Thax, Fidius and Laverna. We're gonna 'talk' and probably start rocking each other. If you ever need help let us know." Laius nodded and Crius left waving at the kids before leaving. Laius came back into the living room and sat with his kids, Apius holding onto his pizza box.
"Hey Dad I kept your pizza safe."
"Thanks Apius." They then spent the rest of the day watching videos, eating pizza and hanging out. Laius's dream. He was going to keep his promise and that made him happy.