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"thumb_large_noncustom_y": "160", "thumb_huge_noncustom_x": "300", "thumb_huge_noncustom_y": "240" } ], "pools": [], "description": "This will ramble a bit, I've never been good at coherent thought.\n\nSo Inkbunny is doing this whole inktober thing and I wanted to show how bad I really am. I uploaded the first one at full rez. Zoom in and you can see how squiggly the lines are. I have zero line confidence. Probably related to having very little self confidence. This is why I don't typically 'ink' things. So usually, I make a sketch like in the second drawing, then I refine that by sketching more lines and erasing. It's a long and tedious process. It's discouraging when I see other artist whip out in minutes what takes me six or more hours across a few days. I'm not exaggerating. I mean minutes. Literally minutes. Simply because they know how to use their hands and arms. I've got pages of circles and lines filled in my sketchbook to try to learn line confidence. I've had no progress, none. I'm still just as bad as when I picked up a pencil for the first time. I suppose part of the problem is that I'm using a tiny ass bamboo tablet. It's not the tools, it's the artist. I constantly feel like I don't fundamentally understand. I'm really envious of those with art friends. To hang out, in person, sharing ideas and tips... I can't imagine how beneficial that would be. That, of course, rolls into how lonely I am. Seriously. IRC is nice and all, but it's no substitute for real life interaction. For fucks sake I'm a 34 year old virgin. Not lying. I was in the US Marines. The fucking Marines and I couldn't get any ass. I went to goddamn war. Fucking WAR. You'd think that would get me some confidence, but no. I have heaps of false confidence and bravado though. I can fake it pretty fucking good. I grow tired of people and their stupid, inane 'problems'. Blah. I've read too many stories of false accusations against men... I'd like to have my own family someday, but it's too risky. Hell, I consider it potentially hazardous to even interact with women in any way more than simple professionalism. Now I'm so scared to fucking death of women that it's guaranteed that I'll never get with someone. When my company went to Iraq, not a single girlfriend, fiancee, or wife stayed faithful. Not. One. Hell, a few months after we got back and my platoon sergeant got retired because he didn't pick up gunny. Less than a week after that, his wife divorced him. She wasn't going to get his benefits any more. I fucking called that shit too. Goddamn, that has nothing to do with fucking drawing. I'm going really of tangent. Okay, back to the matter at hand, how the fuck do I get better at drawing porn? That's all I want to do. The answer is practice, of course. But what? and how? How the fuck am I ever going to properly learn to use my fucking hands?\n\nTL; DR: \nDan drinks and complains. It doesn't matter.", "description_bbcode_parsed": "This will ramble a bit, I've never been good at coherent thought.

So Inkbunny is doing this whole inktober thing and I wanted to show how bad I really am. I uploaded the first one at full rez. Zoom in and you can see how squiggly the lines are. I have zero line confidence. Probably related to having very little self confidence. This is why I don't typically 'ink' things. So usually, I make a sketch like in the second drawing, then I refine that by sketching more lines and erasing. It's a long and tedious process. It's discouraging when I see other artist whip out in minutes what takes me six or more hours across a few days. I'm not exaggerating. I mean minutes. Literally minutes. Simply because they know how to use their hands and arms. I've got pages of circles and lines filled in my sketchbook to try to learn line confidence. I've had no progress, none. I'm still just as bad as when I picked up a pencil for the first time. I suppose part of the problem is that I'm using a tiny ass bamboo tablet. It's not the tools, it's the artist. I constantly feel like I don't fundamentally understand. I'm really envious of those with art friends. To hang out, in person, sharing ideas and tips... I can't imagine how beneficial that would be. That, of course, rolls into how lonely I am. Seriously. IRC is nice and all, but it's no substitute for real life interaction. For fucks sake I'm a 34 year old virgin. Not lying. I was in the US Marines. The fucking Marines and I couldn't get any ass. I went to goddamn war. Fucking WAR. You'd think that would get me some confidence, but no. I have heaps of false confidence and bravado though. I can fake it pretty fucking good. I grow tired of people and their stupid, inane 'problems'. Blah. I've read too many stories of false accusations against men... I'd like to have my own family someday, but it's too risky. Hell, I consider it potentially hazardous to even interact with women in any way more than simple professionalism. Now I'm so scared to fucking death of women that it's guaranteed that I'll never get with someone. When my company went to Iraq, not a single girlfriend, fiancee, or wife stayed faithful. Not. One. Hell, a few months after we got back and my platoon sergeant got retired because he didn't pick up gunny. Less than a week after that, his wife divorced him. She wasn't going to get his benefits any more. I fucking called that shit too. Goddamn, that has nothing to do with fucking drawing. I'm going really of tangent. Okay, back to the matter at hand, how the fuck do I get better at drawing porn? That's all I want to do. The answer is practice, of course. But what? and how? How the fuck am I ever going to properly learn to use my fucking hands?

TL; DR:
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