Prior Andrew was played by
\n\t\t\t\t\tJD_AweThe script is posted below!
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[Prior Andrew is an old wise man. He speaks calmly and stoically.]
[Exedese is pronounced Ecks-eh-deez.]
Record Number 846. Abbot Tirrel and our Duty to the Monastery. Prior Andrew.
[Relaxing music plays.]
It’s not always easy to follow the rules of the monastery. I spend a good amount of time trying to keep our monks in line. After reading the eight hundred and fortieth record by the late Initiate Stephen, I do realize that there is something of a culture shock to those who come visiting the Great Unnamed Mountain. I think that this shock was a bit more intense for the poor initiate than it was for most others.
[Pause.]
Many wonder why we have given ourselves to the rule of a rabbit. After all… he is much smaller than any of us. He has a tendency to hop. He talks with a squeaky voice. Is he not lower than us humans? Should we do the things that he tells us to do?
[Pause.]
The whole idea of our subservience to a rabbit is about breaking down the barriers of the natural pecking order. Humans once believed that they were the apex predator of this world. But with the great cataclysm we learned that there are things in this universe of which are much more dangerous than we can imagine. We never where apex. We were ultimately the prey.
[Pause.]
So if we cannot be the top of the food chain, perhaps we can search within ourselves some measure of equality within the universe. In this way, we find a strange dragon whom we turn to for wisdom, and a little rabbit of whom we allow to guide us. At the end of the day, we are all equal in that we work together for a greater good.
[Pause.]
Deep down inside, we are all frightened of the universe. It is so vast that it seems impossible to overcome. Perhaps it is impossible. It is as if we were devoured by it long ago and simply cannot figure a way to get out. Not even through death. Can the universe even devour death?
[Pause.]
When one considers how absolutely pointless it is to strive for anything in this universe, there then lies a certain twitch of spirit which beckons the heart to simply give up. But in giving up, one may find new breath. And as we breathe, we look towards other things to make us smile. I believe that within this monastery, that thing ends up being the Ceaseless Thinker. It is Exedese.
[Pause.]
Abbot Tirrel knew this long before any of us did. He was the one who gave us the great Exedese. It was his idea to start this monastery to begin with. We all listened to him. We heeded his words. We constructed this great monument to Exedese and have never turned back since. What else was there to do? Humans needed a direction in life. This seemed well enough at the time.
[Pause.]
There is a comfort to letting a small rabbit preside over us. He is not really capable of harming us. He is as soft-spoken as he looks. He is reserved. We all know of his private records. He explained to me that he often enjoys writing about Exedese within the privacy of his own counsel. None of us have seen these records, but we are sure that he also waxes pleasantly of the great Exedese. He does so likely with a great deal more passion, as he was the friend of Exedese before any humans even set foot upon this mountain.
[Pause.]
As I said, I spend much time trying to convince the initiates that obeying the orders of a rabbit is not only right… it is even moral. We can never go back to who we once were. We have to accept that we are now subjects of the universe, and we must answer to he who encapsulates it. That would be Exedese and his one true friend, a rabbit named Abbot Tirrel.
[Pause.]
I admit that I too had my doubts. I began as an initiate as well. I went through the trials. I saw the first human slurped up into the dragon’s bottom. That was difficult to watch, but what was far more shocking was when a monk by the name of Roger was forced in to the tip of Exedese’ huge penis. This was the first time this particular mode of entering the dragon was witnessed, and we did not, at first, know how to take it. We did not even know how it would end.
[Pause.]
We clearly saw Monk Roger get slurped head first into the giant penis. We saw the bulge of his form move through the shaft. He was then deposited into the dragon’s giant testicles. We thought he would pass on quite fast, but we saw the struggles from within the engorged sack for nearly three hours. I have no idea how he survived so long, but it led to much contemplation as to the nature of what Exedese truly is.
[Pause.]
We all sat around the rear of the dragon and watched Monk Roger press his hand against the sack from the inside. We saw the imprint of it from our perspective. Occasionally we would see the form of a screaming face show as well. He was definitely in there… and he was alive.
[Pause.]
As nighttime fell and it began to rain, we watched and listened as Exedese began to grown a bit. He began to rub his penis back and forth upon the ground. It was quite clear that Exedese was masturbating. Monk Roger had possibly been too much for him and was ready to expel the human back into our realm. Was it even possible?
[Pause.]
We were still seeing Monk Roger’s form within the testicle sack. Was he really coming out? What would he say? What wonderful things could he talk about?
[Pause.]
Unfortunately… what came out of the large penis of Exedese was not what we had expected. It was cum. It was shaped and animated like a human for a short time, but it all soon turned into nothing but a sticky puddle shortly after. Monk Roger was gone. But we all knew that he had been transformed into the life-giving seed of Exedese before that happened.
[Pause.]
We all learn from these things. We see them and come to realizations that endear us to the life we have chosen at this monastery. We are humbled by the great size of things… and sometimes by its smallness. It is our duty to serve the Monastery of Exedese with our very lives.
[Pause.]
I am proud to serve here and I ask all monks and initiates of this monastery to bind themselves to the greatness of the Ceaseless Thinker. Humble yourselves. Fall prostrate before the impassable truths. At the end of the day, we are all very small. And maybe that is the way we were meant to be.
[Long Pause.]
Prior Andrew.
[Fade and end.]