“So hey, question?”

“Shoot.”

“You know what a meme is, right?”

“Like lolcats, right?”

“No, no, like the actual sciencey type memes.”

“Oh. No.”

“It’s sort of like a thought virus. An idea that a buncha people have and no one knows where it originally came from or why so many people are having that idea. And then, as people talk about it, more people think about the idea and it keeps spreading.”

“Oh. Cool.”

“Like the cool s. Remember the cool s?”

“Yeah, sorta.” This was the kind of conversation Dave had with his roommate. Especially when they were stoned (like they were now.) “Dude, what if, like... a person was a meme.”

“... I don’t get it dude.”

“Like what if there was a meme, like one of those sciencey memes not the lolcats, but it wasn’t just an idea it was a whole person’s mind and people slowly just started becoming this one person.”

“Duuuuuude.”

“I know right?”

His roommate slowly pulled himself off of the floor, reaching into his boxers to give his ass a scratch. Dave would probably have found it disgusting were he not high. “I’ve got the munchies, gonna raid the fridge.”

“Ey, yo, grab me some doritos.”

“We don’t keep doritos in the fridge, dude.”

“Get me some fuckin’ doritos, asshole.”

“Fine, jesus.” He grumbled further as he wandered his way over to the fridge. “You want cool ranch or the other one?”

“Do we got the other one?”

“I dunno.”

“Whatever we have, dude.”

“What if we don’t have any doritos?”

“There’s a convenience store like a block away, I’ll go fuckin’ buy some doritos dude. It’s not that hard.”

“You sure you’re up to that, dude?” His roommate poked his head around the side of the open fridge door, idly nibbling on a carrot. “You’re pretty baked.”

“I think I can handle walking a block.”

“Two blocks! You gotta make it back, remember? And buy the doritos.”

“That was assumed, dude.”

“Your mom’s assumed.”

“I’m not too far gone to go shopping.”

“You just randomly brought up thought viruses dude.”

“You brought up thought viruses, I just elaborated on ‘em. Besides, everyone knows you’re not too high to function in the real world until you reach the point where you can’t stop thinking about what the deal with hands is.”

“What is the deal with hands?”

“Hey, careful dude, that’s a dark path you don’t wanna start down.”

“I dunno, now that you bring it up I kinda can’t stop thinking about it. That and the meme thing.” She closed the fridge and wandered back into the main room with a bag of carrots under her arm.

“Dude, you were supposed to check for doritos.”

“I don’t feel like it,” she replied with a shrug. “You said you can go buy them yourself, right?”

“Yeah but not if we already have some. Go fucking check.”

“I just sat back down, dude. Go check yourself.” She punctuated her statement by scratching her butt again, right below her cotton-ball tail. He had no idea how she managed to fit her hand in there, given how ill-fitting her boxers were on her fat fuckin’ ass, but she did it. The elastic must have been exceptionally stretchy or something.

“Put some fuckin’ pants on dude.”

“Nah. You fucking love it when I go pantsless,” she said with a smug grin, wiggling her butt for emphasis. “At least I agreed to put a shirt on, right?”

“Yeah, yeah.” She’d used to have a bad habit of going topless around the apartment until he had threatened to kick her the fuck out if she didn’t at least make a concentrated effort to keep her fat tits covered. Not that he’d minded the show, of course, not in the abstract at least. They were very nice tits. Big and soft but not too soft. Hefty without being saggy. Sometimes they leaked, which was kinda hot? But, again, in the abstract. In practice it was weird. They’d had a platonic relationship for ages, as long as they’d known each other at least, and he didn’t want it to escalate past that, or at least not yet.

Also she almost never fucking showered, which was more of a mixed blessing than it sounded like at first blush. On the one hand, while he wasn’t entirely sure if she actually sweated, given all the fur, just knowing about her poor personal hygiene was enough of a turnoff. But on the other hand on those few occasions she did shower it made her smell like a wet dog.

“I’m bored, mind if I suck your dick?”

“Meh.”

“Or you can suck my dick, I’m not picky.”

“Dude, that’s gay.”

“It’s not gay if it’s a girl rabbit dick.”

“It’s a little gay. Like fifty to seventy five percent gay.”

“Aw, c’mon, dude, it’s at most twenty five percent. Prolly less.”

“It’s sucking a dick, even if it’s a girl dick.”

“A girl rabbit dick. That’s, like, minus fifty percent alone.”

“Yeah yeah, whatever.”

“You’re just jealous mine’s so much bigger’n yours.”

Dave rolled his eyes. “I’m gonna go buy those doritos after all if you’re gonna be weird.”

“Booooo! Buzzkill!”

“I’m not a buzzkill, you’re just incurably horny when you get high.” That was the other reason that her poor personal hygiene was such a mixed blessing. When she did shower she smelled like a wet dog, when she didn’t shower she smelled like cum. Dave wasn’t sure how he felt about that being a positive.

“Hey, to each their own. You’re a philosophical stoner, I’m a horny stoner.”

“And also a hungry stoner. All those carrots are gonna make you fat.”

“Hey! Carrots are vegetables! They’re healthy!”

“Rabbits are supposed to eat leafy greens, dude. The orange bit of the carrot is mostly sugar.”

“It’s all gonna go to my tits and ass!”

“Sure. Don’t come crying to me when you get fat and not in a sexy way.”

“Asshole!” She threw her boxers at him, which he deftly dodged as he grabbed his wallet and opened the door. “Buy me some carrot chips!”

“Eat something other than carrots.”

“No!”

“And don’t fuckin’ cum on the TV again.”

“I make no promises!”

“I’m serious, I don’t think we could even afford to get it fixed, let alone replaced. And I don’t wanna hafta explain to the repair guy how we broke it. Again.”

“I make no promises!”

“I’ll be back in a bit.”

“Seeya, dude. Be careful.”

“Yeah yeah.” He closed the door and made his way to the elevator, trying not to think about the fact that his roommate was a curvy rabbit girl with a big dick now. Had that always been the case? Somehow, he felt like she’d been a human dude five minutes ago, when she got up to get food. But that didn’t make any sense. People don’t just change genders and turn into horny rabbit dickgirls, or at least not without noticing it, right?

Right?

“Meh, whatever.” Dave decided not to think too hard about it. That was a thinking-too-hard-about-hands thought process. The kind of thing where just thinking about it was a sign you were too far gone to go down the block to buy some doritos. Besides, they would definitely have both noticed that kind of thing, no matter how high they were.

Also, thinking too hard about his roommate left him with confusing feelings in his pants, metaphorically speaking. Yeah, okay, teasing aside, all those carrots did actually go to the right places. If it weren’t for their friendship, her hygiene, and her cock? He’d absolutely be down to fuck her, the fact that she was a rabbit be damned. And she was down to fuck him, as she made clear repeatedly. Hell, she was down to fuck most people. Girl had like negative standards, which would have been another turnoff if she weren’t far too lazy to go out and actually have sex.

So, really, it was mostly the fact that she had a big fuckin’ dick that did it. No matter how feminine her penis was, it was still a penis. And, frankly, calling that thing feminine was disingenuous as fuck. Thing was like the size of his arm, with balls that almost matched her also really big tits. And he could confidently say their output more than lived up to their size because she’d absolutely made him clean up after her before. Multiple times. It was really gross. And maybe kinda hot, but mostly just gross.

That was about where he was when he got to the convenience store. So much for not thinking too hard about it. He maintained that wasn’t his fault – his roommate had always been the kind of person who just sort of inherently commanded all of your attention. She stood out. It wasn’t like there were any other rabbit girls out there, big dick or otherwise.

“Hey, goin’ shopping? Usually your roomie handles that.”

“Just here to buy some doritos. She was supposed to handle that but you know how she gets.” The clerk tilted his head as if to say that no, he did not know how she got. “She decided she’d rather sit on her fat ass eating carrots and masturbating than contribute to the household.”

“Ew, TMI.”

“You asked.”

“There’s kids here, at least keep your voice down or use euphemisms, dude.”

“Oh, sorry.” Dave made his way down the aisles, avoiding the dirty look from the middle aged looking mom who did, in fact, have two kids in tow. Thank fuck they seemed to be, like, teens. Early teens – like, really early teens, which, you know, not ideal, and either way he was still kinda mortified. But at least he’d not just yelled about sex in the presence of some pre-schoolers. Small blessings. God, he just wanted to get the fuck out of here, now.

He grabbed a bag of cool ranch doritos, before spending a few minutes intensely debating whether or not to grab some of the other one. The kind of intense internal debate that only someone who was extremely high could manage. Maybe, he thought as he grabbed a bag of the other one, he should have stayed at home after all. Between this and that weird train of thought from earlier he was clearly too high to be out and about, but whatever. He made his way around the family and to the counter. “Doritosssssss.”

“Yeah, lemme ring you up,” the clerk said. “That’ll be $8.46.”

Dave frowned as he pulled a ten dollar bill from his wallet. “Did the sales tax go up?”

“I dunno, I just scan the stuff people wanna buy and it tells me the price. You want anything else?”

“Nah, I’m good.”

“In that case, I’m probably gonna take my break,” she said. “All that talk of your roomie reminded me I should prolly go empty the ol’ tanks before I end up doing something unprofessional in front of the customers.”

Dave frowned again, though for different reasons. “Dude, TMI.”

“You TMI’d first, dude.”

“Yeah but you asked. And anyway, you’re the working professional here.”

“I may be a working professional, but I’m still a girl with needs and a really big dick. Union rules mandate that I gotta masturbate at least once every hour or else I might get overstimulated and cum all over a customer.” The clerk smirked, leaning forward and pressing her arms together around her boobs, emphasizing her already emphatic cleavage. The buttons on her uniform’s tee-shirt, the ones she’d actually managed to do up, strained to contain massive milkers the size of her head. “Unless you want me to cum all over you?”

“Dude.”

“C’mon, you let me cum in your ass and I’ll let you fuck my tits. I know you want to know what it’s like first-hand, boy.”

“Dude,” Dave repeated firmly. “There’s kids here.”

“What kids?” the clerk replied, seeming genuinely confused. “The only customers aside from you are obviously adults.”

“Look, mom! That man’s gonna fuck the clerk!”

“Can we join in?”

“Girls, that man’s obviously not big enough for all of us, and the clerk found him first.”

“But moooooom,” one of the rabbits said, grabbing his arm and shoving it into her cleavage. “My balls are sooooooo full!”

“Yeah! It’s not fair that only she gets to fuck him!” the other rabbit said, mirroring her sister’s position. They looked identical, Dave noticed, and he would have assumed they were twins if it weren’t for the fact that their mom also looked the same as them, as did the clerk. They were also very, very clearly the children that had definitely probably been in the store earlier he was pretty sure (was he?) That much was obvious because of their clothing, or lack thereof. They weren’t naked, but only technically. If the clerk’s clothing was struggling to hold together in the face of her tits and ass and cock, the former(?) children’s clothing had straight up failed, almost reduced to tatters in the face of their very adult bodies. Whatever was still intact struggled visibly to contain soft rabbit flesh that oozed out of every single weak spot, slowly making the holes bigger and bigger and bigger. He wasn’t entirely sure how he felt about this particular development, but he was pretty sure that the fact he wasn’t sure how he felt about sexy kids was a bad sign, even if they were very obviously not kids anymore.

“Girls, he hasn’t even said yes, and we already picked out a crate of xxxxxxxxl condoms for you.” She gave Dave a weary smile. “Sorry, dude, they’ve always been rambunctious. I’ll make it up for you by sucking your dick after you’re finished with your friend there.”

“We’ll help!”

This was about as much as Dave could take. He knew what was happening now, or at least he was pretty sure he did. There were two possibilities. Either this was real, which obviously stretched credulity to the point where it fuckin’ shattered into a billion tiny little pieces. Or, more likely, it was some sort of really bad trip. He wasn’t aware that you could have a bad trip on weed, but here he was, having one. The only other explanation was that this mom and her kids and possibly the clerk too had all magically turned into almost exact duplicates of his roommate except bigger in just about every way without him noticing. No, it had to be drugs. That was the only explanation that made sense, even if it kind of didn’t make sense because weed didn’t make you hallucinate. Maybe their latest batch was tainted or something, he didn’t know. Regardless of the cause, though, he was hit with a deep sense of panic, the kind of panic that can only come from a bad high. Yet more evidence of the obvious.

Dave did his best to push that panic back down, but then the mom rabbit put her boobs on his head, which drove home the fact that the rabbits had gone from about a head taller than him to big enough to comfortably boob-hat him (had they, though? He felt like they’d always been that big, but on the other hand he was certain that only a few moments ago they’d been short enough to squeeze his arms between their tits and he felt like those two things were mutually exclusive.)

Either way, it pushed him right back over the edge into panic. “You know what on second thought I don’t need doritos after all I think I’m gonna go lie down see you later.” He yanked himself free of the two former(?) kids and stumbled over to the exit as quickly as he could manage given his current state. Luckily, the various rabbits seemed too distracted by each other to chase after him. The kids had already started making out and jerking each other off before he even tried to leave, and as he made his way out the clerk began climbing over the counter to join in. And thank fucking god for that, because if they had gone after him, he would have definitely gotten thoroughly fucked. Literally. They were just plain too big for him to properly fight back against, especially considering that there were four of them and his heart was honestly not entirely in it. Apparently. That was something about himself he’d not been aware of until now and boy howdy was that yet another thing on the list of things he wasn’t sure how he felt about today.

His initial instinct was to head back home, but he quickly discarded that when he remembered his roommate. And okay, yes, on the one hand this wasn’t actually happening, his roommate was still just some dude. But it sure fucking felt real, and he really didn’t want anyone to see the inevitable results of his weird hyper-vivid hallucinations of busty amazon rabbit dickgirls. Especially not his roommate, and especially especially not when he considered she had, in fact, also smoked the same weed he had and so who fucking knew what kinda bad trip she was having in the background. But, well, then where the fuck should he go? Somewhere private to ride out the bad trip. But where, if not his apartment?

As if on cue, he ran headlong into a cop. Or at least a guy in a cop uniform. “Oof, sorry.”

“It’s fine,” the cop said, weirdly chill for a cop in uniform. “I’m not going to arrest you for not looking where you’re going. Just be a bit more careful in the future.”

“Mnf,” Dave grunted as an idea formed in his head. “Actually, uh. Could you?”

“... Arrest you?”

“Like... throw me into the drunk tank? Sorry. I think someone spiked my weed with something and now I’m having a bad trip.”

“Oh.” The cop made a face.

“I bought it legally. But I’m seein’ some weird shit.”

“What kind of weird shit, if you don’t mind me asking?”

“The kinda weird shit you don’t wanna talk about to strangers or cops.”

“Mhm. Could you let me get a closer look at you?”

Part of Dave wanted to emphatically refuse that, in case the cop suddenly turned into another bunny. He didn’t, because he didn’t want to risk actually getting arrested. Thankfully, his worries were unfounded. The cop didn’t get too into his personal space, just close enough to get a look at his eyes. “Hm. Yeah, you’re pretty out of it, son. I’m honestly impressed you’re lucid enough to ask for the drunk tank.”

“It’s only weed,” Dave said, before pausing to put some more thought into it. “Just, you know. Tainted weed.”

“Well, let this be a lesson to you,” the cop said.

“Vet my suppliers better?”

“Well, I was going to say don’t do drugs at all, but that’s not the worst lesson you could take from this.” The cop gestured for Dave to follow him. “My car’s this way,” he said, before grabbing a radio from his hips and presumably calling it in, or whatever the terminology was. Honestly, everything the cop said into the radio went over Dave’s head entirely. He was just some normal stoner, he didn’t know cop jargon. It all basically amounted to white noise, especially considering he was still extremely stoned. Mostly he was just glad that the cop hadn’t turned into a bunnygirl yet. Yet. It was only a matter of time, unless the trip ended, or decided on an abrupt change in theme.

The ride only took ten minutes, and from arriving at the police station to the drunk tank just barely took more than one. Miraculously, in that entire time, the cop did not transform into a busty big dick bunny girl. Which did not actually help things, only made him increasingly more and more anxious for when the other shoe inevitably dropped. “Got one for the drunk tank.” Oh well, at least now he had somewhere nice and quiet to ride out the bad trip without having to worry about getting someone else caught up in it.

“Another?”

“Yeah, I can’t remember the last time we had to break out the drunk tank and now we’ve got two in one day.”

God dammit.

“Well, there’s room for two. Get ‘im in the holding cell.”

Dave considered vehemently objecting, but there very obviously was only the one holding cell. This was the best he was going to get so he might as well just fucking go with it. He shuffled his way into the holding cell, picked a bench as far away from the other guy as possible, and then sat down to wait, hoping to god that no one in the room turned into a rabbit.

“Probably too late for that, dude,” the other inhabitant of the drunk tank said, sitting up and scratching a very familiar boob.

“When the hell did you end up in the god damn drunk tank.”

“I could ask you the same question. ‘cept I don’t need to, ‘cause I was there.” She stretched, in the process emphasizing her chest – which had somehow gotten even more ample than before. She was wearing a very plain set of clothing, or what had probably been a very plain set of clothing at some point. A white tee shirt, slightly stained, that just barely didn’t cover the underside of her tits. A bulky brown jacket that just barely reached the middle of her arms. A set of grey sweatpants that only reached the middle of her calves, along with a telltale bulge snaking its way down one of the legs. She had discarded her far-too-small boots entirely, wiggling her furry bunny toes in his general direction. “Anyway, the answer is that I didn’t. C’mon, dude, pay attention.”

“Oh yeah. I guess this is just more bad trip, then?” That made sense. It was possible that his roommate had wandered off on her own and gotten thrown into the drunk tank. But it was far more likely that she was just a hallucination.

“Bzzzzt, wrong. I’m a thought virus. Duh.”

“That’s definitely the bad trip talking.” Dave pulled his body up onto the bench, lying down while pointedly facing away from his roommate.

“Oh, yeah, speaking of which. Bad trip? Really. It’s weed, dude. You don’t get bad trips on weed unless you do a shitton of weed. You know this, man, c’mon.”

Dave very pointedly ignored the hallucination. Or at least he tried to, but he was admittedly not very good at it. “Okay, let’s say for the sake of argument that you’re actually a thought virus. Which you aren’t, by the way, that’s stupid. But let’s just pretend that it isn’t. In that case, my best bet would be to just fucking ignore you, right?”

“You’d think that, wouldn’t you?”

Again, Dave made a point of not acknowledging what she had said, or even thinking about it. “And obviously if you’re a hallucination then I should just ignore you or whoever is actually in the drunk tank is gonna think I’m crazy.”

“I mean I guess, but I’m definitely not a hallucination.”

“And, like, again, let’s say for the sake of argument that you’re right and my roommate is patient zero for... whatever the hell you are. How did the other guy in the drunk tank get infected?”

“Who says your roommate is patient zero?”

“And how did the cops not get infected?”

“Who says they’re not?”

“How come I’m not infected.”

“Who says you’re not?”

Shit, that was actually a pretty good point, though obviously Dave didn’t allow himself to dwell on it because duh. He was still pretty sure that she was just a hallucination, but he’d just successfully (?) argued that either way the safest way to handle the situation was to ignore her. There was no point dwelling on the delusion, and he didn’t want to turn into a giant sexy rabbit girl with a giant sexy dick. Which was an especially pressing concern considering he was now thinking that the giant dick was sexy. That was yet another thing that was probably a bad sign, especially if he was wrong and this was in fact a thought virus.

That was probably farther down the train of thought than he really should have let himself go so instead he did his level best to think about nothing. Which, turns out? Hell of a lot harder than the Buddhists make it sound. It probably didn’t help that his cellmate was still, in fact, present and talking at him, loudly and insistently.

“Anyway, you’re actually wrong about the not thinking about me thing. Too many people are infected, you’d have to get everyone to stop thinking about me to get me to go away. And obviously I’m not gonna stop thinking about myself because I’m a raging narcissist with a very healthy ego. And even if you did somehow manage to get everyone to stop thinking about me, you’d hafta keep that up for a while before it’d work. Like a couple ‘a days, at least, of no one even idly wondering about rabbits. And even then, all it’d take is one stray thought and bam! I’m back, bigger’n ever.”

He did not listen, instead focusing on drowning her out with literally anything else that came to mind. Unfortunately there was not a lot that came to mind beyond her. She was loud, she was insistent, and she was very hard to ignore. Beyond the obvious physical traits (which may or may not actually be real), and beyond her obvious attempts to make herself hard to ignore, there was something about her. Maybe that was just the weed, or maybe she really was a thought virus. He didn’t really know for sure either way, and he really didn’t want to know. He just wanted her to go away so he could chew out his fucking supplier for giving him tainted weed and then go buy some fucking doritos and enjoy them in peace.

And, shit, that reminded him; his actual, non-big titty big dick rabbit girl roommate shared the same supplier. Who knew what shenanigans she’d gotten into, unsupervised and tripping balls. Fuck, for all he knew, his cellmate was actually his roommate.

“Wrong again! I’m still back in the apartment. I’m also here, of course. And back at the convenience store – like ten people have come in since you left, by the way, and they’re all me now too. Havin’ a blast back there, you’re missin’ out. And that’s not counting the people who just happened to pass by and get a glimpse in the windows. They’re goin’ a bit slower, but that’s fine because I’m inevitable.”

“If you’re so inevitable how come I’m not you, yet?”

“Do you need me to spell it out for you, dude?” Once again, he didn’t respond. He probably shouldn’t have responded earlier either but fucking whatever, what’s done is done. His best bet was to try and go to sleep – by the time he woke up, the trip would probably be over and everything would be back to normal. “Man, you sure are stubborn, aren’t you? Fine, ignore me, but you’re only going to make things worse for yourself.”

“I-” he started, before catching himself responding to her.

“See what I mean? The harder you fight back, the more likely you are to slip up. And every slip up makes it harder to fight back! You’re gonna hafta be on guard basically constantly, for the rest of your life. Or at least until the point where there’s so many of me that it’s literally impossible to not think about me. It’s not gonna be fun, dude.”

Dave, frankly, didn’t really fucking care if it was fun or not. He was laser focused on the only thing besides the bunny he could think of – how much he wanted all this to be over.

“That’s not gonna help!” Once again, Dave kept his mouth firmly shut. It was really hard to ignore her when she kept loudly talking at him. “Well, duh, that’s kinda the point.”

Something about that particular exchange gave him pause, although he couldn’t quite put his finger on what – probably because he was still in fact trying not to think about her too hard. He kept his eyes and mouth shut and ignored that weird nagging feeling in the back of his mind.

“C’mon, dude, you’ve almost gotten it.” And, frankly, he had zero interest in getting it. “Ugh, since when were you so fucking stubborn? Fine, guess I’m just gonna hafta force the issue.” He kept his eyes firmly closed, so he could only guess at what was happening based on the sounds. He didn’t really need to guess, though. This was one of those situations that immediately explained itself – he could hear her heavy footfalls as she walked over to where he was lying down. “Y’got two options, dude. Either you suck it up and give in to the inevitable, or I’m going to start slapping you in the face with my cock.”

“Hey! Don’t get rowdy in there or you won’t be getting back out for a very long time.”

“Pfft, sure.” She was clearly not particularly impressed by the threat of arrest, and Dave supposed that made sense. It didn’t matter if you threw her in jail because she was also out of jail because she was a thought virus. And, hell, if anything it was probably a benefit to her because it’d expose her to more people that otherwise it’d be hard for her to get at. Or, you know. If she were a thought virus, that would be her thought process. Which, really, considering she was a hallucination, it was her thought process regardless of if she was a thought virus or not. “That seems pretty coherent for a hallucination, dude.”

“Your mom’s pretty coherent for a hallucination.”

“Hey, no mom jokes, that’s a low blow dude.”

“I’m serious, no fighting in there.” Dave was pretty sure that was the same cop who put him in the drunk tank. The voice was the same, or at least he was pretty sure it was. He hadn’t exactly talked to the guy much, and he couldn’t see him because he was keeping his eyes firmly closed. For all he knew, the cop was going to turn into a copy of the rabbit any second now, and the last thing Dave wanted was more rabbits. 

“We’re not gonna be fighting.”

“No other things that begin with F either. Save that for when you’re in private.”

“Boooo! No fun!”

“I’m a cop, it’s my job to be no fun. There’s rules,” the cop said simply, as though that was the only reason to stop her from, as she had described it, forcing the issue. Which was probably a bad sign, now that he thought of it. He didn’t want to open his eyes, but he felt like he had to know for sure. Just to confirm for certain how inevitably fucked he was. Even if it was probably a mistake. It wasn’t like closing his eyes had worked, after all – he was still thinking about her, even with his eyes closed. It was, it turned out, surprisingly hard to specifically not think about something.

“You’re just jealous you don’t get to join in.”

“Green with envy, lady. Now get back to your side of the cell.”

That, meanwhile, was a good sign. Maybe. It somewhat reminded him of how he’d reacted, early on, before he’d properly realized something was wrong. Way more ambivalent than was appropriate, without actually engaging with her shenanigans. Slowly and carefully, one of his eyes creaked open.

Okay yeah he was right it was absolutely a mistake to open his eyes. He should have waited until she had followed the cop’s orders, but he didn’t, and so she was still very much in his line of sight. Right up close, filling his field of vision. He snapped his eye right back shut, but the damage was done. He could hear her leaning forward and smirking smugly. “What happened to keeping your eyes closed?”

“Mnf.”

“Didja like what you saw? I betcha did.”

He did, in fact, like what he saw, much as he hated to admit it. He was pretty sure she’d gotten bigger in the time he’d had his eyes closed, though it was definitely hard to tell because she was so close. Either way, she had filled his field of vision, the prodigious bulge running down her pant leg right in front of his face. An hour ago, that wouldn’t have been the turn-on it was now, but as it was he could absolutely feel himself stirring. Metaphorically speaking. “Just go back to your damn side of the cell.”

“Are you sure you want me to?” she cooed slowly.

“Yes.”

“Are you suuuuuuuure?”

“Hey, what did I just say,” the cop interjected.

“That you’re about to be too busy to bother paying attention to us?”

“Close, but no.” Dave could hear the cop getting up and making his way over, but he could only go by hearing so he couldn’t fucking tell what was actually going on. He could always open his eyes and check directly, but he didn’t want to test his luck on that one. The last time he’d opened his eyes had gone pretty fucking terribly, and he did not want to repeat that mistake.

Of course, he did not actually need to see what was going on to know what was happening. She’d basically told him what was gonna happen next, and that knowledge plus his other senses was more than enough to suss out what was happening. He could clearly visualize a second cop, probably already partly a bunny, coming down the stairs and quickly moving into position and grabbing the cop before he could react. Surprisingly quickly, actually, considering how big she was. She had to lift him up into the air in order to force a deep, passionate kiss on him. He struggled, for a bit, making noises of protest that slowly but inexorably morphed into moans of pleasure as he started to melt into the kiss.

And then, of course, the transformation kicked in. He hadn’t actually gotten to see it happening. Every time it had happened so far it had just sort of... not happened. Like they’d always been a busty amazon bunny futa and no one except him noticed they hadn’t been a busty amazon bunny futa a few moments ago and honestly it was only repeated exposure that let him notice it at all. But also he knew there was a transformation because their clothes remained unchanged. Hence all the ill-fitting and even destroyed outfits he’d seen today. Again, maybe a bit too logically consistent for a drug trip? But... fuck it, he was kinda having a hard time clinging to the idea that this was a drug trip at this point anyway. He still wasn’t quite ready to admit to that, of course, but he’d had more than his fair share of trips before and this really didn’t feel like a trip.

So, no, it just made sense that there was an actual transformation somewhere and he just couldn’t properly see it because of the strange, mind-rewriting properties of the living meme – and also because he was, in fact, still high, even if this was really happening. Fur sprouting on the cop’s skin, breasts swelling, hips widening, waist narrowing, bones shifting and lengthening. Face changing from human to rabbit as her ears lengthened and moved to the top of her head, forcing her hat off of her head. Her clothing strained against her new, ample proportions. Buttons popped, one after another after another. The other rabbit no longer needed to hold her up or hold her back, instead focusing on squeezing her fattening ass while she returned the favour, pressing their bodies against each other. Boob against boob, bulge against bulge, bigger and hotter and faster as they both built up to a mutual climax.

“And that,” the rabbit in the cell said with a smug smirk. “Is me forcing the issue. See? Isn’t it so much more fun to just go with the flow?”

“Mnf.”

“You definitely look like you’re enjoying yourself, at least.”

Dave yanked his hands out of his pants and slammed his eyes shut. Damn, how had that happened without him noticing? Actually, never mind, it was hardly the first time something had happened without him noticing today. It just stood out more this time because it was him rather than someone else. Until now, he had at least been in control of his own actions – minus some impairment as a result of the weed, obviously, but that wasn’t the same thing. It was one thing to have your reflexes dulled and your judgment impaired by drugs, that was the point of doing drugs. This was not that, this was him starting to masturbate without realizing it.

“You’re still goin’ by the way, dude.”

God dammit. Sure enough, his hands had found their way right back into his pants and around his dick. He was going to have to actively fight back against his own body’s urges, actively thinking about keeping his hands out of his pants. “Because you’ve had so much success with controlling your focus so far today.” Unhelpful. “Not s’posed to be helpful, dude!”

There was, of course, an elephant in the room that Dave had been actively not acknowledging. He could keep his hands away from his dick all he wanted, but the cop had been the only thing keeping her from, as she so eloquently put it, forcing the issue. And that had barely worked before he’d become her. He couldn’t imagine she’d intervene in stopping herself from doing something, unless he really was hallucinating in which case who fucking knew if what he was experiencing even lined up with what was actually happening, which meant it didn’t even matter. He certainly couldn’t stop her, considering her sheer size. At this point, the only thing keeping her from physically intervening was, both metaphorically and also literally, herself.

“I gotta admit, it’d be a lot more fun if you gave in of your own free will,” she said with a shrug. “It isn’t like I’m on a time limit here. You’ll change eventually, and in the meantime I’ve got plenty of ways to entertain myself.”

“Like giving myself a blowjob!” she said, speaking through what had once been the cop before getting down on her knees and opening her mouth wide.

“Or getting a blowjob from myself!” She steadied her shaft with one hand, grabbed the back of her head with the other, and sloooowly slid it down her own throat. Which, really, was quite impressive considering just how big her cock was wait no stop thinking about her penis.

“Or just sittin’ here and jerkin’ off a bit!” Speaking of thinking about her penis, the her in the cell sat down in the middle of the ground and, with a flex of her hips, tore through what was left of her pants with her colossal erection. He was pretty sure it’d gotten bigger since he’d last looked at it, though he really didn’t want to look at it too closely. Like a third fucking leg, jutting out of her torso, thick and throbbing and drooling. Really, it was the smell that did it. The second it emerged from her pants he was drowning in it, thick and heady and musky. Made him horny. Well, okay, he was already horny – he’d been repeatedly jerking himself off without realizing it, after all. But the scent made her more horny. Her cock practically ached for her to touch it, and it was really hard to keep her hands off of it. She needed something, anything to distract her from her dick. And that something, she realized, wasn’t gonna come. She’d effectively driven herself into a corner here. Isolated herself. Literally locked herself in a cell surrounded by the thing she was trying to distract herself from. Smart move there, very clever. In her defence, she’d not really been entirely aware of the nature of what was going on at the time. It seemed like a good idea. How could she have known how it was gonna turn out? It was like – well, like she’d never actually stood a chance at resisting from the very beginning. Just like the rabbit kept saying. Might as well just give up. Not that she was gonna, of course, but it was getting harder and harder to keep her motivation up.

The rabbit, for her part, was content to ignore her cellmate’s existential dilemma. She was more than content to wait, and in the meantime was happily entertaining herself. Several times over, strictly speaking, and that was only factoring in the three hers that were present. One hand rubbed her shaft while the other gently cradled her balls, her chin pressed firmly against the base of her shaft while she firmly held herself in place by her ears, her tight throat undulating around her meat as she began to jerk off in earnest, both hands because it was so big, pumping up and down as she gently rocked her hips which rubbed it against the cold ground which felt really good, gently pulling her head up and down its length as she slipped it into her chest and began titfucking herself, licking and sucking and jerking and god it was a lot.

“Ah~”

“Startin’ to feel it, are we?” she grunted.

“F-fuuuuuuck~” her voice was noticeably higher pitched than it had been the last time she talked. Familiar, too, though she tried not to think about it.

“Here’s a pro tip, dude; check your ears.”

She did not check her ears. She knew what she’d find, but actually touching them would be tantamount to admitting defeat. And she still wasn’t ready to admit defeat, not yet. “Hey, can I just... go? Like, are you gonna try and stop me?”

“Why would I?”

“I’m technically in jail.”

“Yeah, sure that’s something that still matters.”

“See that’s why I’m asking.”

“Why do you even want to leave? You asked to be here in the first place, dude.”

“I want some fresh air, this room stinks.”

“Sure that’s the reason you want to leave. It’s not like you’re gonna be able to escape me either way, dude.”

“Whatever.” She could probably have come up with some sorta retort or another, but the longer this conversation went the more she could feel herself slipping away. Instead, she was just going to leave. Go right back to ignoring her.

Unfortunately, that plan was basically immediately a bust. The second she stood up, she hit her head on the ceiling. “Ow, fuck!” That was weird. She was pretty sure she wasn’t tall enough to bump her head on the ceiling, but apparently she was.

“Ha, was wondering when you’d notice that,” she said with a grin. “I tried to warn you this’d happen, but you were really dense about it.”

“Mnf,” she grunted, slouching over and rubbing her sore head – and, in the process, encountering the damn rabbit ears she’d tried to avoid encountering. “What are you talking about?”

She sighed. “I guess I’m just gonna hafta say it outright. The more you hold me back, the bigger you end up getting when you finally give in.” Slowly, an eager grin spread across her face. “And you’ve already been holding me back for a very long time, patient zero.”

“Bullshit.”

“Hey, you don’t get to call bullshit on this one dude.”

“I am absolutely calling bullshit on being patient zero. There is no way that makes sense.”

“You’re patient zero, dude. Always been patient zero. From the very beginning.”

“How.”

“I’ve been lying dormant in the back of your mind, like a TV show you watched a lot as a child but haven’t thought about in decades and so it’s completely faded from your memories. Until one day, outta nowhere, someone mentions a name or you see a clip from it on youtube and suddenly all the memories come flooding back at once. Your roommate brought up thought viruses and bam. There I was. Why else do you think you suddenly found yourself wondering about an entire person who was a thought virus?”

“Because I was high?”

“... well okay yes that too, that’s not exactly too far off base for weed thoughts. Still kinda thinkin’ about hands, by the way.”

“I warned you about hand thoughts, bro.”

“Yeah, well, sometimes you just can’t resist the siren allure of wondering what the deal with hands is! It’s not my fault the first person you passed me on to was stoned out of his mind!”

“I was stoned out of my mind.”

“Not when you became patient zero!”

Right yeah, she’d kind of been trying to distract herself from that. Not that it was gonna actually help, of course. She’d started to transform, she was pretty sure that was the point of no return. Also, she was pretty sure she hadn’t been a she like twenty minutes ago? But if that was the case she hadn’t noticed the transition (again), and also it was kind of hard to say for certain there even was a transition. It was like she had multiple sets of conflicting memories – one where she was some stoner loser surrounded by people turning into rabbits, one where everyone had always been rabbits, one where everyone had always been the one rabbit, and several degrees in the middle, all fighting each other for dominance.

And right now it kinda felt like the bunny was winning.

Idly, she looked down and was met with a huge wall of furry tit that hadn’t been there before, had always been there, and was significantly smaller than it had always been, all at once. It was weird and uncomfortable and she didn’t much like it. Like reality was contradicting itself in multiple ways at once – and slowly getting worse as she changed more and more. Except also she wasn’t actually changing so much as she’d retroactively always been that way. Again; weird and uncomfortable.

Speaking of uncomfortable, if she had always been this way she would have worn clothing that fucking fit. The iteration of her that was her cellmate was wearing an ill-fitting outfit, but she herself might as well have not worn anything. What clothing she had was stretched beyond its limits, and frankly she was impressed it was still intact – even if it barely covered anything at this point. Her shirt just about covered a third of her tits, pressing them together and digging in tightly. Her pants were a similar affair, though it was hard to see them over the shelf of tit. She could feel her ass spilling out in the back, just as much as her boobs were or maybe even moreso.

And, well, she didn’t need to feel the front. It was big enough that she could see it over her tits, just barely hooked into her sweatpants and boxers alike, thick precum bubbling through both layers of fabric. God, it looked so much bigger now that it was on her.

And her feet fuckin’ hurt. That was really the worst part. Her shirt and her pants were uncomfortable, but her shoes were painful. In a weird, fucked up kinda way it was almost a blessing? The discomfort and the pain were obviously unpleasant but also it provided a better distraction from the transformation than any of her earlier attempts to distract herself. Not quite enough that she’d actually stopped transforming, but maybe, just maybe, it would be enough to get her out of her head if she focused. Close her eyes, sit down, keep her mind on the pain, and keep her mind off the bunny.

Of course, even as she came up with the plan, she knew it wasn’t going to work. There was one key flaw, one glaring issue that left any attempt at resistance doomed to fail. The same thing that had fucked up all her other attempts at shutting her out.

“That’d be me, right? Here, lemme get those off for you~”

Right yeah that. That was the one. Any attempt at distracting herself from herself was foiled by the fact that she was trapped in close proximity with, uh, herself. God this was confusing. And only shaping up to get more and more confusing as the things that made her her slipped away into oblivion, replaced by the things that made her her. It would be easier if she had a name, but she supposed she didn’t really need one. No point in having a personal signifier to differentiate you from other people if everyone is you.

“See, now you’re getting it.” That was about as far as that particular train of thought managed to get before she grabbed one of her feet and lifted it up, pulling on the heel of her shoe until it popped off. That already felt miles better, a sense of relief washing over her that got even more intense as she undid the laces, relieving most of the pressure. Actually pulling it all the way off was, distressingly, practically orgasmic. She was already very horny as it was, and so wires were getting crossed and the pleasant relief of getting her feet gently rubbed turned into something else, something new – maybe. She was pretty sure she hadn’t been into feet five minutes ago.

“It’s not new for me!”

“Mn, shut up.”

“Not new for you, either, because you are me~”

“Not yet.”

“Dude, are you still trying to hold me back? C’mon, you and I both know there’s no point in trying.”

“Mnnn shut up,” she snapped, straightening her leg in an attempt to kick her in the face.

It almost worked, too. Just barely didn’t reach, stopping centimetres from her stupid smug snout. Her eyes widened slightly, almost surprised that she’d managed that, but it was quickly replaced by that same smug expression. “Oh, you wanna step things up a notch, then? Okay then.”

“What are you – ah! S-stop that!”

She did not, in fact, stop that. She resumed the footrubs, only somehow more intense, pressing her face against it, licking and kissing and sucking at her furry toes. It felt really good and she was really weirded out that it felt good. “Such a big foot. More like three or four feet, am I right?”

“Mnnn!”

“Makes sense, rabbits are known for big feet and I am a rabbit which means you’re a rabbit too. A really fuckin’ big rabbit, too. An’ gettin’ bigger! Y’know, I take it back, maybe you should keep trying to fight back against me. That way you’ll get even bigger, which means I’ll get even bigger~”

“Mnnnnnn stop talking!”

“Why? Does it feel good to have me talkin’ so close to your big ol’ foot? Air from my mouth brushin’ against it? Hate to break it to ya’, but we’re a rabbit and feet are an erogenous zone for us~”

“S-since fuckin’ when.”

“Since always, I don’t make the rules.”

“Mnf.” She yanked her paw away. “A-anyway, I’m not into it.”

“Fine, fine, we can do paw shit later, then. Maybe I’ll give you a footjob.”

“I don’t want you to give me a footjob.”

“Don’t worry, by the time I do, I’ll be giving me a footjob.”

“Stop that!”

“Stop what?” she replied, her tone of voice making it very clear she knew exactly what to stop and had no intention of stopping it. “You know very well what!” she snapped in response, only to realize that she hadn’t snapped but rather she had snapped. “This’d be a lot less confusing if you just gave in, y’know.”

“Mnnnnn~” Actual coherent responses were getting harder and harder as the transition progressed. And it was progressing, much to her chagrin. No matter how hard she tried to hold onto herself, she could feel her creeping in from the edges, slowly and insidiously, like water dropping from a leaky tap onto a piece of paper and washing away what was written on it. Grasping at the edges of her mind and pulling in tighter with a quiet inevitability. She had no intention of giving up, of course. Inevitable it might have been, but she was going to be kicking and screaming the whole way.

The problem was that as that inevitable progression marched on she could feel more and more vividly what she was doing. All the sex, all the growth, all the orgies popping up around town. The closer they were to the prison, the more clearly she could feel what she was doing and what was being done to her. It had already been borderline impossible to keep her off of her mind with just one person’s worth of horniness but now... well, technically it was still just one person. But that one person was also a hell of a lot more than just one person – and counting.

She kept trying to push back, futile though it was. At least putting up a token effort at ignoring the sensations that were washing over her. She could feel her cock getting stuffed down her throat, and her throat getting stuffed with her cock, even though neither throat not cock were actually hers. The same was true of basically every other part of her. Her paws, her hands, her tits, every reasonably available hole was being used and she could feel it – and she could also feel a few more industrious hers attempting to get use out of unreasonably available holes. It was pretty fucking vivid, too. Almost but not quite like it was happening to her directly. There was a very slight dullness to it, just a bit muffled. Or a lot muffled, depending on physical distance. Like she was in a house where an orgy was taking place and a few people were having sex in the room she was in and she could hear and see what they were doing clearly, and a few more people were having sex in the hallway and they were less clear but still audible, and more people were having sex in other rooms that she could still hear through closed doors and walls and sometimes multiple closed doors and walls and the more layers there were the harder it was to hear but they were all so enthusiastic that there wasn’t anyone she couldn’t hear.

Except, yanno, with physical sensation instead of sound. Kind of a key difference there, but fuck it it was a metaphor not a description of what was actually happening. The point was that it was very hard not to think about sex when you were sitting in the middle of an orgy. Even if you yourself weren’t participating. Or at least not yet – again, inevitability.

Speaking of yet, her cellmate stood up, turned around, and then got right back down on the ground, waving her fat ass in the air and giving her a nice view of her puffy, drooling pussy, nestled behind her fat full balls. “C’mon, dude,” she said. “Let’s just get this over with already. I’m beyond sick of dragging this out, and so’re you.”

“‘m not.”

“You absolutely are, don’t lie. This whole process is miserable. It’s boring for me, it’s torture for you. No one’s gonna say you went down without a fight, so you don’t gotta worry about your misplaced pride takin’ a hit. And it’s not like you’ll be gone gone, considering you were me before anyone else was.”

That was, actually, in a weird, fucked up kinda way, sort of comforting? A bit? Knowing that she’d still be there even if she became someone else because she was already sort of that someone else and had been that someone else for an indeterminate amount of her life? Which was, again, kind of a fucked up consolation. But on the other hand, it was kind of hard to focus on how fucked up a consolation that was when she was still waving her butt in her face, the scent of her arousal (and also her arousal, and slightly more distantly her arousal and her arousal) wafting into her nose, filling her mind with thoughts of sex.

Well okay no that was an understatement, the thoughts that were filling her mind were a lot more explicit and detailed than just sex. Her cock twitched and drooled, and her vision and mind alike were filled with the image of her rear, presenting itself to her. Face down, ass up. Perfect level to just stick it in right now. Fuck, what was she doing again? It was hard to think. That metaphorical orgy was getting more intense, harder to ignore, even the stuff happening out of sight and sound she could smell and several of the participants were getting conspicuously close and touchy and honestly she was no longer sure if she was still being strictly metaphorical. She had slowly inched her way closer and closer to her dick, without actually touching it. At some point the former cops had stopped sucking her dick and had entered the cell, taking up spots on either side of her, and more of her crowded their way down the stairs as she spread throughout the police station. More and more, everywhere, overwhelming, surrounding her with her. She could see the orgy, she could hear the orgy, she could smell and taste and even feel the orgy.

And that was about all she could take without participating in the orgy.

It took her a moment to get up to full speed. Inertia and all that, like a semi-truck slowly revving its engine to full power. She stood up – and up and up and up, to the point where she really didn’t even count as standing anymore. She’d gotten bigger, clearly, beyond just bumping her head on the ceiling. There was a part of her that kinda wanted to be bigger, but that’d require her to keep holding back, and frankly she wasn’t entirely sure why she’d been doing that in the first place. Mostly she was just glad she didn’t need to move much to get her dick right up against her pussy.

She paused there, just for a moment. Not that she wasn’t eager to put her dick in her pussy – she was pretty sure she was, at least, but she wasn’t totally lost just yet. She was very aware that once she put it in her, that’d be it. There’d be no more her, just her. And that was something she still had somewhat mixed feelings about. Sort of. She also had mixed feelings about having mixed feelings about it. That last part of her that still clung to who she once was would be gone forever and obviously that part of her was not okay with that fact and frankly she was starting to get sick of it. She’d spent so much time doing nothing but fighting against this inevitability, even after she realized it was an inevitability, and she was getting tired of it. It was like when you’re playing a game of chess and early on you make a bad move and by the time you notice it was a bad move it’s too late to recover and there’s no way you can win so your only options are to stubbornly keep playing until you inevitably lose, or give up. And generally if you stubbornly kept playing until you inevitably loss then neither player ended up having very much fun.

And she very much wanted to have fun, which meant that it was time to concede. No more hesitation, no more holding back, she plunged forward and buried herself in herself.

There wasn’t really a single moment of transition, not that she could identify. That was true of all of her but it was even truer here. She’d have thought that there’d be an obvious point of transfer when she put it in, but really there wasn’t? It was almost like... well, it was almost like she’d already been basically all the way there and had deluded herself into thinking otherwise. Which meant that whole fuckin’ pause and internal monologue there had been a pointless waste of time.

Oh well, she wasn’t going to let that get to her. She had plenty of other concerns, after all. Like, for instance, all the sex. And she did mean all the sex because hoo boy was she having all the sex. Not just fucking herself in the prison, though that was obviously something of a focus because it involved the original her finally giving up and joining in the fun for real. She took up positions on either side of herself and pressed her hips and boobs against her hips and boobs, squeezing and groping while she pounded her pussy. More of her attempted to join in but quickly gave up because she was just so big and there wasn’t enough room in the cell which was lame but also whatever, it wasn’t like she was just having sex in the cell.

There was also the orgy in the convenience store, obviously. The next shift had made the mistake of coming in from the back so they didn’t get the advanced warning before becoming her, and from there it had spilled out into the streets. Which, naturally meant things escalated faster because she could just start grabbing anyone who passed by rather than having to wait for them to transform on their own. But it also, by the same token, sorta slowed down the spread because they couldn’t go elsewhere before fully becoming her. Luckily, that was only an issue for now. The convenience store had spread her plenty, and all of those hers were starting their own orgies. The second had also long since wandered out of the apartment to have some fun which in turn led to even more spread.

And, of course, word had gotten out about the bunny orgies spreading across the town. Everyone who heard about them was infected. Everyone who spread the word was infected. And of course she let her grip slip just enough on just enough people for a news crew to show up. What kind of idiot would she have to be not to do that? So everyone who watched that broadcast was infected, too. Especially once it really got going and the reporter and cameraman became her, and everyone at the news station.

Not a local broadcast, too, she’d managed to get some national-level coverage, baby. Which, if she played her cards right, would lead to international coverage. Which was obviously game over. Everyone watching the news would inevitably be her and from that point it was only a matter of time before she spread to everyone who wasn’t watching the news. At that point it’d just be, like, that one island in Southeast Asia that had no contact with the outside world and maybe some undiscovered South American tribes that’d be the last holdouts of individuality and honestly they didn’t really even count. Like, they didn’t know or care that all of humanity outside of their island had been infected by a thought viruses that turned them into big dick busty bunny bitches. Or, you know, big dick busty bunny bitch. Just the one. If she really wanted to she could probably, like, dump some fliers of herself on that island or something. But, again; if she missed that one tiny hyper-isolated population of humanity then she still counted that as a win because it wasn’t like they were interested in rebuilding society. Prolly were barely aware society existed in the first place.

She didn’t really have to put much thought into that, though. She’d reached the point where everything up to those isolated populations being the only holdouts would happen, like, automatically. No more direct input needed on her part. Which was good, because it meant she could focus on the fun bit. That being, again, all the sex. All the sex. Allllllll the sex. A lesser bun would have been overwhelmed by the sheer sensory overload that came from being everywhere and having absurd amounts of sex in all of those places, but she was not a lesser bun. Though, now that she thought about it, letting the sheer sensory overload overwhelm her sounded kinda fun. Again; everything else was gonna happen on its own so she could just do whatever she fucking wanted. And fight now she wanted to go full-on no-thoughts head-empty fuck machine. Let all the fucking and sucking and sucking and fucking wash over her, wiping away all conscious thought and replacing it with pure hedonistic pleasure. So that’s what she did, with a big dumb grin on her faces.

That big dumb grin slowly fell into a deep frown. “God dammit,” she muttered, giving herself a good slap on the asses as she ploughed her pussies. “Still fuckin’ thinking about hands.”