Ah, brain melting fun. I've been stuck trying to figure out how the hell the two following things work: homosexual interspecies seahorse sex and why the hell women like to dress themselves up as if they are peacocks (the male ones, the females are peahens and are kind of dull). Yes, these are the weird things that entertain me on the long drives I have to make out here in outback Queensland.

Here's the homosexual seahorse conundrum. Now (in case weird elements of biology like the sexual genitals of animals aren't your subject of study, don't judge me,) in the Syngnathidae family of fish it is the males that get pregnant or have the greater investment in pregnancy, carrying their brood for a period of time. Male seahorses in particular actually have a brood pouch that the female will lay her eggs into and he will fertilise them. So, in the most basic of terms, the females have the penises and the males have the babies. Now if you look at the homosexual behaviour of seahorses (which is apparently a thing,) and bring it into the world of anthros, you end up in this weird position where the males have the fuckable hole and the females have the "penis" (or ovipositor if you want to be accurate), which means that in cross species homosexual sex, the males end up in this sort of male/cuntmale state while the females end up in this female/dickfemale state where the female seahorse lays her eggs in her partner. (I do a lot of driving out here, that being said; NEW STORY IDEA!)

Now onto the weirdness that is this weird trend of human females dressing up around the theme of the male Indian peafowl. It confuses the hell out of me because it just sends so many mixed signals. By donning the flashy and attention getting apparel that makes you think of the peacock (you have no excuse, it's in the bloody name), are you trying to say that you're trying to attract the attention of the females as well? Are you actually a male? Are you a transsexual? Are you a drag queen? Are you saying that by donning the pride of the male peacock that you "don't need no man?" I'm so confused! (A LOT of driving.)

So, after contemplating these two conundrums, eventually I just thought it better to mix the two together and end up with this one story of a homosexual relationship between a male seahorse and a male cross-dressing peacock (with a penis, because it's just not fun otherwise). You're welcome internet.

"It is important to remember that in this day and age where the culture war has just made a complete shit-show of everything, who (and not what) you have sex with is still the most important thing." -Avanti Halfhorse (SO MUCH DRIVING!)

It had been a quiet night for him. He sat on the couch after another difficult week at work, dressed in a soft dressing gown with his webbed feet up on the coffee table and a game controller in his paws. He'd been playing a shooter with a couple of online friends for a few hours, but the fun was wearing thin and the only reason the yellow and black anthro seahorse hadn't gone to bed is because he was waiting for his boyfriend to get home. A quick glance at the clock next to the TV told him that his anthro peacock boyfriend should be home soon, but he'd hopefully be able to finish this round before he returned.

The sound of swishing feathers along with the clatter of high heels on the floor outside the apartment told him that his time gaming was just about at an end.
"Alright guys, you'll have to manage without me," he said over his headset as he got ready to quit the game. "His highness is almost home and I'll have to help him get out of get up, as usual."
Despite the cries of protest in both text and over audio, he quit his game and sat back in the couch as he waited for the door to open.
The sound of the front door being thrown open was followed by the annoyed stomping of high heels, the dramatic swoosh of a train of feathers, the door slamming, a squawk, the front door opening again and it slamming shut with more anger than before. As he got off the couch and made his way into the kitchen, he started to guess just what sort of night his boyfriend had suffered through and could already guess just what drink order he was about to get. He guessed it was going to be a cider of sorts, it was just a matter of....
"Fucking drunks pull a feather from my tail one more time and I'm going to ruin my favourite pair of heels!"
Definitely a hard apple cider night.
He took two bottles of cider from the fridge and made his way back into the living room just as his boyfriend starting pacing back and forth, his paw on his furrowed brow as his bunched, metre and a half long tail knocked over anything small that got in its way. Initially, living with a peacock had been difficult, but as soon as he learnt how to live around the luscious tail his boyfriend loved to sport, it wasn't such a hindrance.

"MORGAN!" His boyfriend called out, obviously unaware that he was standing in the doorway to the kitchen. "I NEED A...!"

With a swift, well-practised twist, he took the bottle cap off one of them and handed the open bottle over the couch without missing a beat.
"Hard cider?" He asked with a smile.
"Shit, um," his boyfriend stammered as he was caught off guard, "yeah."
"I could tell from your mood Mayur," he said as he walked around and sat down on the couch, taking the bottle cap of his own cider and taking a sip.
"I just had a shit night," Mayur sighed as he did his best to sweep his tail and dress between his legs before sitting down next to him. "I spend hours getting my tail just right, more time in front of the mirror getting my act down, dress myself up in my best attire and all I get from it is listening to some drunk heckler thinking he's funny for pointing out I'm a drag queen. I'm a peacock, I think everyone's figured that out."
"And yet you complain when you don't drag," Morgan said as he sipped on his cider.
"I know, you'd think I'd give up with the way these shoes pinch my feet."
Mayur lift up one of his feet and wriggled his toes to try and get some feeling in them again.
"They do look nice though," Mayur added as he admired the dress sapphires that adorned the strap.
"Typical bird," Morgan said as he got up and moved the stool he used for helping Mayur in and out of his clothes and shoes, careful to make sure Mayur's tail was between the legs, "always attracted to the sparkly things."
"You know me," Mayur said with a rather sarcastic air. "Shiny over substance; it's why you're my boyfriend."
"And here I was thinking that it was merely because I could put up with your diva attitude."
Morgan picked up one of Mayur's feet and began to remove the strap around Mayur's ankle that held his high-heel on.
"I may be a drag queen, but I'm certainly no princess," Mayur said as he leaned his head back against the couch while felt Morgan removed the shoe and begin to massage his scaled foot. "I can at least get through a night without whining about my feet. I could just slap some of the other performers."
"Because that'd just make my Friday," Morgan replied. "Bailing my drag queen boyfriend out of the watch house after he got into a fight with another drag queen."
"Make for a hell of a story for my blog though."
Morgan didn't say anything as he kept rubbing the pads on the bottom of Mayur's foot, squeezing and rubbing his fingers across the tough skin. It wasn't long before Mayur was holding up his other foot for Morgan to undress and massage as well.
"You are a gift of the sea," Mayur sighed as Morgan took his other foot, removed the shoe carefully and began to rub it as well. "I can't remember how I managed before I learned of your talents with my feet."
"You used to soak them, remember?"
"Can't hold a candle to your fingers. I still don't know why you spoil me like this every time I drag."
"One of those 'happy that you're happy' things," Morgan replied as he rubbed between Mayur's toes. "Besides, you always look good in your outfit."
"You sweet talker," Mayur sighed as he leaned forward just enough to take a sip of his cider.
Morgan kept rubbing Mayur's foot until Mayer gently pulled his foot out of Morgan's grip.
"Alright sweetie," Mayur said as he gave his toes a wiggle, "I know what you're after."
"Whatever could you mean?" Morgan said, trying to sound as innocent as possible.
"I know just what you're after and you're not getting anything until you've helped me undress; I don't want to get anything on my good outfit."
Mayur took another sip of his cider before putting his bare feet on the floor.
"Help me stand and you can get me undressed," Mayur said as he put his bottle of cider on the side table next to the couch (on a coaster, of course) and held his paws out for Morgan to help him stand up.
"Spoil my fun why don't you," Morgan sighed as he stood up and moved the stool from above Mayur's tail.
"I know what you're after," Mayur said as Morgan helped him stand up. "You always love getting under my dress and making a mess under there."

Careful to make sure his tail was pulled out behind him and not tangled up, Mayur stood up, stretched his arms out to his side and, almost as if showing off, spread his tail out so he could give it a gentle shake.
"You don't need to seduce me," Morgan said playfully as he watched Mayur drape his tail over him.
"I don't have to, but I still like to," Mayur said as he started to rapidly quiver his feathers, the blue-green eyes within the feathers seemingly gazing down upon him.
"Well put your tail down and I'll get you out of that dress," Morgan said as he reached up to touch the long feathers of Mayur's tail, "or else you'll have to send it to the cleaners."
With only a mildly annoyed huff, Mayur dropped his tail carefully and turned around so Morgan could get at the zip on the back of the dress.
"Stop huffing, you can show off in a minute," Morgan said as he began to slide the zipper down Mayur's back.
"But I look prettier in the dress."
"I know you like strutting around and flashing your tail in your Friday night outfits," Morgan said as he slid the zipper to the bottom of its track, "but you know I prefer it when you aren't so skinny."
Mayur didn't say anything as Morgan unhooked the zipper and opened up the back of Mayur's dress so it was easier to get off with the peacock's large tail. Morgan couldn't help but trace a finger between the teeth of the zipper and over the back of Mayur's corset.
"I always feel so conflicted about this," Morgan said as he slid his finger up and down the lacing of Mayur's corset. "You look so sexy in it, but it does rob what I find sexy about your body."
"I don't know who's pickier about my appearance," Mayur noted as he held his arms forward, letting the shoulder straps of his dress slip down his arms, "you or me."
"You're picker," Morgan noted. "You're the one that's always obsessed about fitting into your dresses."
Morgan gripped the waist of Mayur's dress and as the top slipped free of Mayur's arms, he eased it down just far enough so that Mayur could step out of the dress.
"You are a drag queen's best friend," Mayur sighed as he carefully lifted his legs out of his dress one at a time. "If we ever broke up, I don't know if I could do this by myself anymore."
"You flatter me," Morgan said as he stood up and carefully took the dress into their bedroom to hang up.
Mayur picked up his cider again and took a big swig from his bottle as he waited for Morgan to return, shaking and spreading his tail a bit so it felt more relaxed.

When Morgan returned, he had shed his dressing gown, leaving him wearing only his tight black briefs and found Mayur standing in the living room, one foot up on the couch as he finished the last drops from his bottle of cider. Mayur had obviously become impatient waiting for him and already untied the lacing on the back of his corset, revealing the belly the garment contained.
"Damn, you're so sexy," Morgan moaned as he walked over and knelt down in front of Mayur so he could rub his cheek against the corset clad belly of his boyfriend.
"You seahorses and your bellies," Mayur said with a smile as he ran his paw over the crest on Morgan's head.
"A big belly is a fertile belly," Morgan replied, his eyes closed as he cooed and sang in the back of his throat. "Signs of a good partner."
Mayur couldn't find to words to reply, but as his boyfriend fawned over his belly, he couldn't help but spread his tail out and fan it forward so he was hanging over the two of them like a canopy.
"You are missing your gloves though," Morgan muttered as he rubbed his cheek in circles around Mayur's belly.
"Alright Hun," Mayur replied as he gently played with the crest on Morgan's neck, "they're in my handbag, but if you want the gloves, I'm taking the corset off."
Morgan didn't immediately get up, as if thinking about his choice, but after a couple more minutes of rubbing his cheek against the corset covered belly of his boyfriend, he stood up and walked into the hall to find Mayur's handbag, which he often left on the entrance table. Mayur finished loosening the laces on the back of his corset and began to lift it up so he could take it off, but did have some trouble getting it over his arms, the stiff bracing within it making it hard to lift up past his shoulders.
"Why don't you just drop your tail?" Morgan asked as he walked back into the living room, holding the long, white, elbow-length gloves in his paw.
"Because that's no fun," Mayur replied as he tried again to lift his corset up.
"And you have to always show off," Morgan said as he walked over, put the gloves down on the coffee table and helped Mayur lift the corset up, past his shoulders and over his head.

With the corset removed and left on the couch for later, Morgan handed Mayur his gloves as he knelt back down to rub his face against Mayur's belly, smoothing the peacock's feathers back down with his cheek.
"I swear, rubbing yourself against my gut is your foreplay," Mayur said as he slipped the gloves onto his arms one at a time. "One day I should see if you'll cum just from playing with it."
"Not tonight though," Morgan replied as Mayur put his glove-covered paws on Morgan's head. "I need to feel full."
Mayur couldn't help but smile as he looked down at the cooing and humming seahorse that was so obsessed with his belly, seemingly lost in his own world. He'd had partners that would obsess over his cock or tailhole (and one or two who did both), but only Morgan seemed obsessed with the proof that he just didn't have THAT much dedication at the gym, or the willingness to go back to a "natural diet". The sliding of his gloves over the cheek the seahorse wasn't obsessively rubbing against his belly gave a soft sound that Morgan seemed to enjoy just as much.
"Well Hun," Mayur said as a heads-up, "at the rate you're going, you'll be ending up with my seed on your cheek rather than in your pouch."
Morgan pulled his head away from Mayur's belly slowly so he could look at the bulge Mayur was now hiding in his panties, the stain of his arousal already starting to spread across the silken fabric. He pressed his lips against the bulge and gave it a gentle lick, getting a taste of the precum that was starting to seep from the tip.
"That can wait for the morning," Mayur said as he pushed Morgan's head back a bit, watching the erotic show going on around his crotch intently. "Keep that up and you'll have to go to bed with an empty pouch."
"Choices, choices, choices," Morgan purred as he looked up at Mayur, "but you're right and I'd much rather bed my pretty peacock that just fill up on his seed."

With a careful turn and slow steps that caused his hips to sway, this swing exaggerated by the spread of his tail, Mayur walked around the couch so he could sit on the back of the couch, which let him drape his feathers down and over the seat, and look over at his boyfriend with the best "come here" gaze he could muster. He watched Morgan stand up without breaking their shared gaze and (careful not to stand on his beautiful tail) walk around the couch so the two could stand facing each other with their appropriate bits at just the right height for what they were about to do.

Without words, Mayur put his gloved paws on Morgan's hips and began to slide the seahorse's black briefs over his hips and far enough down his legs to let gravity do the rest of the work. After stepping out of his underwear, Morgan pressed his body up against Mayur's and his pouch opening pressed up against the bulging crotch of Mayur's panties, the lips at the opening spreading out to engulf the protrusion the silken fabric could barely hold back.
"Feels like I'm not the only one making a mess of my panties now," Mayur said as Morgan rubbed his pouch opening against Mayur's panties, "but we're not going to get far like this, are we?"
Morgan seemed too far lost in his pleasure and was cooing and throat singing as he always did when they had sex, so Mayur knew he'd have to extract himself before Morgan came just from dry humping himself against his bulge. With a skilled touch, Mayur rubbed his paw along the bridge of Morgan's muzzle which encouraged the seahorse to slow down, while his other paw slipped down between their bodies so he could extract his cock from his panties and get them out of the way so they wouldn't intrude upon their fun.
Mayur's glove started to become covered in the precum that was oozing from Morgan's pouch opening as he slipped his covered paw under the elastic of his panties, eased his cock free of the desperate grip of Morgan's body and free of the fabric before slipping it up into the opening to Morgan's brood pouch. The moment their bare skin touched, Mayur felt Morgan's body grip his cock tightly and start to pull him as deep as he could go to ensure that none of Mayur's gift would be wasted. It was always an intense situation for Mayur and he couldn't help but let out a gasp as he felt muscles clench around him tighter than anyone else he'd ever slept with. Mayur couldn't control himself now, replacing the paw he had on Morgan's muzzle with his forehead and top of his beak as his paw reached around to grab at the seahorse's shoulder. Morgan responded by reaching down with his paws and sliding his paws up and down the back of Mayur's legs, still clad in their black stocking from his evening performance, fingers occasionally catching the garter belts to pinch and snap the elastic material against the legs of his boyfriend.
"You're so damn sexy," Morgan muttered as he started to thrust himself up against his peacock boyfriend as if he were the one breeding rather than being bred. "I wish you could dress up like this every night."
The tables of control now turned and as Morgan took charge, leaving Mayur gasping and panting as his cock slipped through the grip of Morgan's pseudo-pussy. Each hungry thrust of Morgan's hips made him squawk or moan as his cock was gripped tighter, holding it tight to ensure that nothing would be lost. The sensual rubs of Morgan's paws even added to his feeling of being dominated and each small sting of his garter belts snapping against his body sent a chill up his spine. Morgan had so many different moods when they made love and Mayur had to admit that he loved every single one of them.
"Harder," Mayur could barely moan between his panting breaths, "don't hold back my naughty seahorse."
"I'm not stopping until you've filled my pouch," Morgan replied as he kept thrusting his hips against Mayur's. "I want to be bigger than you when we're finished. Make me swell my peacock."

When they'd first started dating, this weird sex talk had been hard to deal with, but that had changed as time went on and as Morgan said those words to him, Mayur couldn't help but give in.

Mayur's paws shot down to grab at Morgan's rump, squeezing the seahorse's butt as he pulled their bodies close and as his cock buried as deep as it could into his boyfriend, Mayur couldn't help but let out a triumphant call as his cock began to pulse, spilling his seed deep into Morgan's brood pouch. Upon feeling Mayur begin to shoot his seed into him, Morgan cooed as his body gripped the cock tightly and his own seed started to fill his pouch as he too reached his climax. Their seeds mixed inside Morgan as they held each other close, savouring their shared orgasms.

The two of them stood there panting, their heads still pressed together as their arms held the other in place.
"Do you want to go to bed?" Morgan asked as he rubbed his head against Mayur's.
"Yes, but that'd involve getting undressed," Mayur groaned as his glove covered paws rubbed Morgan's butt, "and I don't feel like getting undressed just yet."
"I don't want to move either, but I just thought it'd be a good idea to move to the bedroom now rather than later when you're ready for another rut."
"Come on, I know you like afterplay," Mayur whined, unwilling to move just yet.
"I love afterplay, but not half way through our fun."
Morgan carefully stepped back as he pulled Mayur with him so their bodies stayed together.
"Unless you're getting too old," Morgan added.
"Ooh, going right for the ego," Mayur said as he pulled his head away from Morgan's. "Are you sure you want to do that?"
"If you think I can't take you rutting me all night long, then you underestimate me."
"Oh no, you're not lying there all night while I do all the work. I want some love as well."
"Then go get your tail sock on while I get myself ready."
Mayur gave Morgan a quick and gentle peck on his cheek before turning and slowly walking towards the bedroom, his tail dragging along the floor as his hips slowly swayed from side to side.
"At moments like these, I wish my dick was real," Morgan said under his breath as he stared at his boyfriend strutting his way to their bedroom.