

Gassy Blunders

	It started off as a normal day for Carter’s Pokémon Gears, an Arcanine sized Absol, his lover Pattie, a Zoroark with a frilly apron, their son Emory, a cute little Zorua and Tai Fong, a Mienshao with battle bracers on his wrists concealed by his whip-like fur were all just trying to enjoy their time being at the fancy villa owned by their trainer. Something then acquired Gears’s attention everyone had a look on their faces like something was bothering them “…Hey what’s wrong…?” the Absol asked. “Something’s bothering my tummy…” Emory answers “…Same here…” Pattie said after Emory “I think I have gas…” Tai Fong stated. Gears couldn’t help but giggle to the situation “You all have gas?” he says trying not to laugh at this “…To be honest I’ve had gas too, but I’m not makin’ faces about it. Well there is one thing we can do now…” He smirks. “…and what is that…?” Pattie says tilting her head wondering “We pass it of course!” Tai Fong scratched his head “…You mean…” he started “…out our butts?” “BINGO!!!”Gears shouts with a toothy grin “All in favor raise your hand or paw.” Nobody, excluding Gears, raised anything looking at each other “…or you can keep that pressure in your guts and just sit there looking like you’re constipated makin’ faces at each other, it will come out eventually…” Gears eyes drew to Pattie “You’ve done it before, Pattie…like twice.” Pattie blushed knowing that what Gears said was true, “…Heh, heh yeah you’re right” she says raising her hand.

       Emory jumped seeing Pattie raise her hand “If mama’s in I’m in too!” he barks raising his paw. Gears, Pattie and Emory all looked at Tai Fong, being the only one who hasn’t raised his hand yet. “Okay, okay…” Tai Fong said when all eyes were on him “I am in too…” raising his hand as well. “So are we just going to do this a random or something?”  Tai Fong asked “Oh, no…” Gears answered “That would be boring.  How `bout we turn this into a contest to see who can make the best one; the one who goes first should be the one who has the biggest urge to just… let one rip! Unfortunately, I don’t have the urge right now…” Pattie rubbed her stomach “not yet…” she said “Nothing…” Tai Fong said twiddling his thumbs, but Emory giggled “I do!” he says raising his paw again Pattie smiled when she heard that from Emory “Okay, sweetie make it a good one! Do you want mommy to help you?” 
       
       “Nope!” Emory said with a smile “…I am a big boy now I can do it on my own.” He starts to position himself, sticking out his rump out “Stand back… I’ve eaten a lot of beefy things today.” Gears and Pattie grinned at Emory’s warning “We can take it!” Gears and Pattie said almost simultaneously “Okay…” Emory then shows his butt to Gears and Pattie. Tai Fong however, took a step back seeing that Emory is about to fart “HERE IT COMES!!!” Emory shouts gritting his teeth, clenching his eyes shut, and then he feels an immense pressure in his rectum. He raised his hind leg and let loose a loud bassy fart which was rather malodorous, the smell hit everyone pretty hard Tai Fong covered his nose, Gears shook his head trying to resist the odor and Pattie goes over to Emory and hugs him “Aww, Emory I’m so proud of you!” Emory giggled and let out a cute poot as he hugged her back “I’m actually sorta proud too” Gears said with a grin “…that will be hard to beat. So, who’s next?” Tai Fong raised his hand “I have one, so get ready…” He then walks into the middle of the room and put his hands on his knees and leaned forward. “Behold my aura training!” Tai Fong declares, then blasted out a slow, hot and long hiss of a fart that smelled even worse than Emory’s was. “ARGH MY NOSE!!!” Gears shouts covering the said part Tai Fong sighed feeling his pressure going away. Pattie and Emory cough loudly backing up from Tai Fong “What did you eat!?” Pattie asked covering her nose “Oh, I had curry and milk.” Tai Fong answered “Goodness…if you can turn curry into THAT you’ll poke a hole in the Ozone layer!” Gears finally shook off the smell “Man that was strong, very strong…” as he was fanning the odor away “…So I wonder who is next…” his eyes drew to Pattie “I’m guessing you Pattie?” Pattie smirked “you would be right!” she then walks in the middle of the room and gets on all four Gears could hear her stomach gurgling with anticipation. Pattie raised her hind leg just like Emory “Check this out!” she shouts then spits a small ember from her mouth, followed by her releasing a bubbly fart which instantly ignited! Pattie was now shooting a flamethrower from her rear end Gears and Tai Fong did not know how to respond to that but say “WHOA!!!” Emory also stared in amazement to the fire show.
       
       The flames subside only the smell remained. Tai Fong gagged “It smells like a Garbodor and a Skuntank got into a fight” Emory giggled “Good one Mama!” Pattie gave her butt a pat “Oh… Hold on I got another one anyone wants seconds?” she asked “Hey!” Tai Fong complained “I thought we were only allowed one blast per try” Gears looks at Tai Fong “Pardon me? I didn’t establish that rule besides; Emory did two now I guess Pattie going to do another, that and…Tai Fong volunteers!!” He shouts shoving Tai Fong to Pattie “YOU JERK!!!!” Tai Fong roared at Gears, but a second too late Pattie took Tai Fong’s head and places it at her butt and blasted her second fart in his face “AAAAAAAAAHHHH MY NOSE!!!!!!!” he howls in displeasure “Ooh that one was pretty wet…” Pattie said turning to Tai Fong “Are you Okay there?” she asked “Your poop went up my nose UGGGHHH!!!” Tai Fong wailed trying to blow his nose “Hey what’s going on in there!?” shouts an outside voice the door opened it was Troy a tall young male Lopunny with a dull expression on his face “I am hearing someone bellow like an Exploud what is…” He was cut off smelling a foul odor “UGGH! W-WHAT THE HELL!?” Pattie started to blush her face turning a very deep red like her big red mane, knowing she is directly responsible for this reaction “What is that smell!?” Troy shouts covering his nose Pattie looked at Troy “Uuuuuhh… what smell…?” she said trying to look innocent. Troy’s eyes narrowed to Pattie “You’re telling me you don’t smell that…” he took his hands off his face the smell filled his nostrils again and he gagged “Okay whoever it is just clear it up and I’ll come back later!” Troy shouts shutting the door and sprinting for the exit. 
       
       “Well that was embarrassing…” Pattie said still blushing “Okay…” Gears slowly say “Now it’s my turn!” Everyone turned to Gears remembering what they were doing before Troy came in to interrupt. “You all might want to back up and hide your noses, because you are all going to know why I am called the Disaster Pokémon soon enough…” Tai Fong paused “Wait a minute…” he muttered “I thought you were called the Disaster Pokémon because you possess the ability to foretell disasters, but when you appear to warn humans and Pokémon they come to the conclusion that you bring the disaster…” Gears gawked at Tai Fong for a moment trying to take in all the things Tai Fong just said “Have you been hanging around with Simon?” he asked “It’s a figure of speech my boy…just back up and plug your nose.” Tai Fong understood what it meant now “Oh! Okay.” He says putting his hands on his nose and backing up. “Nerd…” Emory whispers “Ok…HERE WE GO!!!!” Gears shouts raising his tail and blasting out sputtering farts, which were without a doubt the foulest smelling farts in all of the Sinnoh Region, smelling like a sewer accompanied with rancid meat the farting lasted for 18 seconds. Everyone was grossed out from the smell “Okay, okay Gears!” Pattie coughed trying not to breathe in “I think you beat us we can stop now that last one was just awful!” Gears gave an accomplished grin and agreed with Pattie nearly getting dizzy of his own fumes, but suddenly another gas bubble blasted out his hole he then realize, to his surprise he lost control of his gas “I…I CAN’T!!!” He shouts as he blasted out one fart after another. Pattie, Tai Fong and Emory, not taking anymore, ran out the room coughing violently. They all were outside gasping for air “Did not see that coming…” Tai Fong muttered “…We almost choked!” Pattie moaned “I hope Papa is okay…” Emory wondered. 
       
       “We can’t leave him in there…” Tai Fong said a little worried "We have to go get him!" Pattie took a step back "I am NOT going back in there!" She said very firmly "Oh come on!" Tai Fong said with an "are you serious?" face "It may have already cleared up by now and if not just use you apron as a filter it won’t be that bad!" Pattie paused for a moment and looking another direction. Tai Fong expression now looked irritated "So you would rather your lover choke in there?" Pattie placed her hand on her forehead, feeling defeated with the statement that Tai Fong just made "Okay fine, FINE!!!" she said giving up "Wait here okay Emory?" Emory nods obeying the order Pattie gave then walk with Tai Fong back to the house. Pattie and Tai Fong and approached the door that they all came from, the door opens the smell of Gears's farts were, very much still lingering  they both gagged, then cover their noses as the enter the gaseous villa. Once they arrive at the room where they were having there contest they both see Gears on the floor unconscious, his eyes in two different directions and he is foaming at his mouth "There he is!" Tai Fong said pointing to him "Now we have to carry him out of here."
       
        
       
       "Dibs on his front legs!" Pattie quickly calls out and walks over to him picking up the Arcanine sized Pokémon’s front paws "You should be careful and don't part his legs or lift his tail, because if you do he might still have some gas left." Tai Fong knew that would be bad if that happens he cautiously grabs Gears's ankles and held his tail down as they carried him out of the room down the hall. Tai Fong, under Gears’s weight accidentally dropped on of his ankles and to his displeasure Gears, still unconscious blasted another fart in his direction Tai could only cough and gag very loudly "I warned you..." Pattie said not surprised that it happened. After all the carrying they successfully got Gears out of the house and lay him on the grass "Well that went pretty smooth..." Pattie said a little sarcastically "...But we've manage to get Gears out of there." Not a moment too soon, Troy returned after running away earlier and saw every one outside "What are you guys doing out here?" Troy asked "...And what happened to him?" seeing Gears still unconscious.
       
       "Uuuhh... I guess you could say" Tai Fong started "Gears... exerted his pressure..."
