	*   *   *   *   *


-CHAPTER SEVEN-

"The bedroom's upstairs. The two big doors with the arch at the top. I'll be up in a second," Xander said as he hurried off to round up his parents.

Bartleby nodded, then wandered out of the kitchen, looking around for a staircase. Ah, there it was. A very elegant white spiral one that led from the livingroom to a balcony above. Bartleby trotted up and saw the big doors at the end of the hall.

One was slightly open already, so he poked his head inside to have a look.

"...Wow."

Sunlight streamed in through an enormous floor-to-ceiling window, bathing the wide, friendly room in a sparkling haze. The bedroom contained the usual grownup stuff; mirrors, dressers, closets... But the bed was the undisputed centerpiece. It was the biggest one Bartleby had ever seen!

He stepped hesitantly into the room to get a better look at the mammoth bed. It was wide enough that his whole family probably could have slept in it all at once. There were oodles of fluffy pillows spread about on it. There was even a purple silk canopy overhead, drawn up for now, supported by four golden posts like carousel poles.

He hoped no one would mind, but he just couldn't resist. Bartleby slowly crawled up onto that vast mattress. He grinned. It was even softer than it looked! It would be like sleeping on a cloud. He giggled and bounced up and down a little bit.

"Bartleby?"

The little bat's head swiveled around as Xander came into the room. "Oh! Um, I'm sorry. Dunno if it's okay that I'm up here..."

Xander just laughed. "Aw, we don't care. You're not a pet dog!"

A moment later, Mrs. Oakley entered, wearing a white headband and carrying her tennis racquet. She spotted Bartleby crouched on the bed. "Oh, how cute!"

Then Mr. Oakley entered, and if Bartleby thought he'd been impressed before...

Xander's dad was tall, handsome and perfect. He looked like a classical statue come to life. He looked like one of those underwear guys in the magazines. But he didn't have that aloof look in his eyes. Instead, he was smiling warmly, maybe even a bit goofy. His fur was the shade of ripe, county fair pumpkins, with ink-dipped paws and feet, and starlight-white chestfur.

But that wasn't what Bartleby was so fascinated with.

Xander grinned slyly, noticing that Bartleby was staring straight at his dad's cock with his mouth hanging open. "What's the matter? Never seen a black one before?"

"...No." He certainly hadn't! That big fox sausage was pitch black! The same color as the fox's nosepad!

Mr. Oakley finally noticed where Bartleby was looking. He thought it was hilarious. The kid's eyes looked like they were about to pop out of his head like ping-pong balls! "So, you're Xander's new classmate?" he asked with a friendly grin.

"Huh? Oh! Uh, yeah!" Bartleby said, and blushed about as hard as he could.

The big fox gave Bartleby a firm, friendly handshake. "Pleased to meet you." He thrust his crotch towards the boy. "And he is too!"

"*Daaad*!" Xander said, giggling.

"I'm just giving him a better look at it!" the big fox said innocently.

Mrs. Oakley had put her tennis things away and came up behind her husband to give his tail a little yank. "You're so naughty!"

"It's really cool looking, Mr. Oakley," Bartleby said sincerely. "Why's it black though?"

He shrugged his shoulders. "Natural variation, I guess. Why is yours darker than Xander's?"

"It is?" Xander came over beside Bartleby and compared cocks. "Hey, he's right!"

Mrs. Oakley arched her back and murred as she enjoyed a good stretch. "So dear, do you think we should take a shower before we yiff? We are kind of sweaty."

He came over and sniffed his sexy wife all over. "Mmmmmm! Not a chance!" he said suavely.

Bartleby sniffed the air and easily caught the musky, foxy scent. It was strong, definitely, but very alluring. "I like it too!"

"Yeah! C'mon, let's play!" Xander said eagerly. He jumped onto the bed on all fours and wagged his tail.

"Feelin' frisky, little pup?" Mr. Oakley asked.

Xander yipped happily like a little wild fox.

Bartleby chuckled.

The two grownups approached the bed from different sides and laid down together, herding the boys in between them. They all snuggled up, giggling softly as their fur rubbed together and tickled. Bartleby was pressed between Xander and his dad. He could feel their body heat, and how soft their fur was compared to his own. Xander's dad put his arm around Bartleby and playfully skritched the boy's tummy.

The little bat's heart was fluttering. He couldn't believe he was about to get yiffy with his new friend from school, plus his sexy mom and dad!

What made the moment special wasn't just the erotic aspect of it. It was that everything was so relaxed. It was as if this was perfectly normal, everyday stuff. Xander's family looked like they were completely comfortable with one another. All this was was a fun way for the foxes to show how much they loved each other.

Far from being dirty or bad or naughty, or anything like he'd always seen sex portrayed as in movies and TV, the moment was calming, joyful, warm and happy. Bartleby thought it was a lot more fun that way.

"So, Bartleby, you're our guest," Mrs. Oakley said in a soft purr. "What do you think we should do first?"

"Oh, this is fine right now," he replied, sounding a little dreamy. "Just cuddling. It's nice to be held."

Xander was sandwiched between his new bat friend and his wonderful mom. He nuzzled her beautiful, soft titties. She giggled and petted his fur. Xander took a nipple in his mouth and began to suckle.

"Would you like some milk, Bartleby?" the vixen asked.

"Really? Um, sure!" The little bat snuggled closer, leaning around Xander and pressing their warm boy bodies tight together.

Mrs. Oakley held out her other breast to him and cooed blissfully as the little bat took it between his lips. A deep contentment filled her. She loved indulging her motherly instincts like this. "Drink up, sweeties," she whispered, and caressed the little cubs' heads.

Warm, sweet fox milk flowed freely into Bartleby's mouth. He let out a long, pleased, "Mmmmmm!" Delicious! And much richer than the stuff from the grocery store!

Mr. Oakley skootched closer to watch the two little boys nursing from his wife. The sight was incredibly arousing. His cock got stiff and poked Bartleby in the butt just a little.

Bartleby 'Eep!'ed, but in a good way. His own boyhood got bigger. He looked up to Mr. Oakley to let him know he hadn't minded that one bit!

The handsome fox leaned over to nuzzle Bartleby's cheek. The boy squirmed and giggled. Mr. Oakley kissed his son's new playmate all over his face, including up and down his long, leafy, beautiful ears. "You're a very handsome boy, Bartleby," he said. "Bats are so exotic. I love your sexy ears." He gave them a little nibble for emphasis.

"Thank you!" said Bartleby, honestly touched by the compliment. He'd been called 'Dumbo' so many times at school, it was hard to believe anyone could like how his ears looked.

"Cute nose, too," Mr. Oakley said, and gave Bartleby's noseleaf a gentle kiss.

Bartleby shivered delightfully. Then he placed a small peck on the big fox's round black nosepad. "You too!" he said, and went back for more milk.

Xander was in a perfectly blissful daze. He loved cuddling and yiffing and playing with his mom and dad more than almost anything. But when he got to invite a friend to share in the fun, it was exponentially better! Feeling his dad's fur behind him, Bartleby to his side, and his mom's big, nummy breast between his paws was an overwhelming sensation.

Mrs. Oakley moaned softly as she watched the boys enjoy their treat, occasionally sharing kisses with her husband.

Bartleby felt like he was wrapped up in a magic fox fur blanket. Happy tails wagged all around him.

Mr. Oakley let out a muffled moan as he pressed his hardness against Bartleby's soft tush. He thrust slowly against the slightly-coarse fur, teasing his foxhood, reveling in the sensation.

Bartleby blushed and his young cock got even stiffer. "Ohh... That feels really good. Are you gonna put it in? It might be too big; I've never done that before..."

The big fox gave Bartleby a reassuring kiss. "It's okay. I won't then. You don't mind if I keep rubbing up against you though?"

"Not at all!"

A gentle chuckle. "Good then! I like it too!" He nuzzled the adorable little bat's ears all over as he lovingly pressed himself between Bartleby's buttcheeks, like a hotdog in a bun.

"Ohhh!" Bartleby yipped.

"If you like, you can yiff me," Xander told Bartleby with milk dribbling down his chin. "I'd like that a lot."

"O-okay..." the slightly-overwhelmed young bat replied. The boys wriggled around a bit, getting into a 'spoon' position. Bartleby couldn't reach Mrs. Oakley's breast anymore, but that was okay. He reached down to guide his penis into the warmth of Xander's cute butt. He felt the little bud of his friend's anus touch his tip. Both boys shivered.

Mrs. Oakley smiled sweetly. "Little boys are so cute when they're yiffing!" she squeaked merrily. She massaged her vacant titty as she watched the cubs getting ready.

"Thank you for the milk, Mrs. Oakley," Bartleby said politely. "It was delicious!"

"Mind if I try some?" Mr. Oakley asked Bartleby. He leaned over and cupped the boy's cheek in his paw. He kissed the little bat tenderly on the lips, sharing the taste of his wife's milk. "Mmm..."

Bartleby could barely contain himself! He was being kissed right on the mouth by a handsome, grownup fox! He felt like little red cartoon hearts were about to start popping out of his head!

"Oo, tasty!" said the big fox.

Xander pushed himself back, grinding his rump a little onto Bartleby's cock. "Don't forget about me!"

"I won't!" With a sunny smile, Bartleby pressed his hardness forward. He felt the little fox's tailhole give a bit, and then accept him suddenly inside like a tiny, tight mouth.

Both boys cooed in pleasure!

"They're yiffing!" Mrs. Oakley exclaimed. "How sweet!" She caressed and petted the two boys all over with her nimble paws, making them grin and squirm delightfully.

Mr. Oakley reached out to put his arm around both boys. He patted his son's tummy, then dipped lower to cup the younger fox's yiffer in his strong paw.

"Dad! Yeah, do that!" Xander cried lustfully.

"I love you so much, son," the big fox murmured. He pressed firmly against Bartleby's little tush pillows, loving the feel of the young bat's tiny pucker in the middle and his thin tail swishing back and forth, teasing his cocktip. He stroked his son's penis lovingly. He lightly pinched the tip, just how Xander liked. He also rolled the boy's balls between his fingers.

Not to be outdone, Mrs. Oakley stretched out and aligned herself with her son. "Come on, sweetie. Make Mommy happy..."

"I love making Mommy happy!" Xander replied, and he knew just how to do it too. The two of them wiggled even closer until the lusty vixen could feel her son's maleness nudging at her cunny.

Mr. Oakley took the opportunity to grab his wife's buns and pull her and their son closer together. She 'arf'ed foxily, and began rubbing her soft paws up and down Bartleby's back.

Xander thrust forwards, slipping into his mom's moist little entrance and feeling Bartleby slip out of him a bit at the same time. "Whoa, that's cool!" He pushed back against Bartleby, and pulled out of his mom! Into mom, out of Bartleby. Into Bartleby, out of mom! The little fox giggled as he set up a good rhythm and started to *really* get yiffy.

Bartleby cooed as he was caressed by vixen paws, enveloped by Xander's hot tush, and pressed into by that big, wonderful, hot black foxcock! He could feel it perfectly imprinted on his bottom, even the bulge of the knot!

"Mom... Bartleby..." Xander whimpered. "I think I'm gonna cum...!"

"Yes! Oh yes, sweetie, fill me up!" Mrs. Oakley urged. "I love you so much, my beautiful, beautiful sexy boy! Fill me all up!"

"Yiff me, Bartleby!" Xander cried.

"Okay, Xander!" He pushed hard into that tight little hole. "I love you too!"

"I love you too, too!" Xander said with a giggle. He closed his eyes tight and moaned, holding his mom tight as he gave her a sizeable squirt of his hot boycum.

"Ohhhh! I can feel it inside me!" she said with a blissful smile on her face. "My good little boy!"

"Bartleby, I'm gonna cum too," Mr. Oakley warned, huffing and puffing. "Is it okay if I spooge all over your cute butt?"

"Yeah! Go right ahead!" the little bat said excitedly, and wiggled his tail in response.

"Alright... Oh!" the big fox thrust harder, careful to make sure Bartleby would enjoy it too. That soft, soft fur! "You are such a sexy little bat!"

"Thank you, thank you!" Bartleby cried, his heart soaring at feeling so loved!

"Ahh... Nnngh!" Mr. Oakley's back arched and a torrent of hot sperm blasted out of his ebony cock. It completely soaked Bartleby's butt. It was an utter deluge. Bartleby's tail, his cheeks and even inside his little hole; all completely covered in Mr. Oakley's white stuff!

The feel of that hot fluid spurting all over him and getting him so delightfully messy made Bartleby's pleasure reach its climax as well. His long tongue flopped out as he wordlessly shot into Xander, filling his butt with love.

Seeing all her sexy males getting off was what did it for Mrs. Oakley, and she finally fingered herself into fourth place. Her orgasm sent a shiver all the way through her to the tip of her tail. She let out out a long vulpine howl of joy.

In a mass of fur, sweat, cum and love, the four yiffy furs all collapsed into a dreamy, hazy afterglow.

All was quiet in the bedroom for a while. Nothing but the sounds of sheets rustling, fur brushing against fur, soft murrs, and gentle 'thank you' kisses.

"That was wonderful," Bartleby finally said. "Thank you so much. I... I'm so happy. Everything felt so good!"

Mr. Oakley rested his muzzle in Bartleby's floofy hair, breathing in the boy's scent before giving him a kiss. "You're welcome, Bartleby. I loved having you join us as well."

"Me too, sweetie," said Mrs. Oakley. She patted the little bat's sticky bottom.

"Me too, Bartleby," Xander joined in. He turned himself around just long enough to land a quick peck on his friend's cheek.

Bartleby murred in total bliss. What a fun family! He had a feeling he'd be coming over to visit Xander all the time now...

		***

After a while, everyone was just snuggling contentedly, sharing soft kisses and caresses while they talked about all sorts of things.

Bartleby, naturally, asked a lot more questions. He was glad to find the Oakleys so accepting of his newness. They all remembered when it had been their time to be wide-eyed and confused, so they were more than happy to fill the little bat in on anything he needed to know.

The mildly sleepy bat boy yawned, showing off his astonishingly long tongue.

"My goodness!" Mrs. Oakley exclaimed.

He chuckled. "You like it? It comes standard on most of us bats. I think our ancestors used 'em to gather nectar, but I mostly use mine to get at those last little drips of milkshake in the bottom of the cup."

The vixen chuckled. "I'll bet I could think of some other uses for it..." she said naughtily.

The males all chuckled. Bartleby patted Mrs. Oakley on her tummy. "So, when are you having the baby?"

Instantly, the three foxes went silent and winced awkwardly.

Bartleby's ears drooped. He absolutely hated that moment of realizing a topic he thought had been perfectly innocent was actually a bright-red raw nerve. "I'm sorry... What did I say?"

Mr. Oakley patted him on the wing. "It's okay. You didn't know."

"What? Didn't know what? I assumed that if you had milk to give us, that meant..."

Mrs. Oakley sighed bittersweetly. "No, dear. That's just something I chose to change about myself. I like how it feels to have my big strong men nursing from me." She ruffled Xander's headfur. "But no, I'm not pregnant. I can't get pregnant, ever again."

Bartleby's heart went out to her. He could tell she was a woman who very much enjoyed being a mommy and who probably hoped to have lots more pups someday. "Aww, that's so sad! Why not?"

"Well, we are kinda dead," Xander said. "Mrs. S. told us about this one time. She said only life can create new life."

"Oh..." Bartleby didn't understand exactly why, but that did seem to make sense for some reason.

"We are thinking of adopting someday though," Mrs. Oakley said. "A new baby brother or sister for Xander. Think about how many little cubs die every day, even babies, and their parents still live on. There's always a need for someone to take care of them. In fact..." She'd gotten an idea. She looked up to her husband to clear it with him. Though only facial gestures, they were able to communicate perfectly, and his answer was yes. Mrs. Oakley cupped Bartleby's cheek in her paw. "You're all by yourself, sweetie. If you like, you'd be welcome to come live with us for a while until you get on your feet."

Xander's tail wagged and his ears perked up. "Really? He can stay? Sweet!" He gave his mom a huge hug.

Bartleby seriously considered the idea. He nibbled his thumbclaw as he always did when he was thinking hard. "Geez... I dunno..."

"It's okay, you don't have to make a decision now," Mr. Oakley said gently. "But I know I wouldn't mind having another cute boy around the house to play with." He grinned and gave Bartleby's tush a gentle pinch.

The little bat giggled. He took a deep breath and thought hard about this decision. Xander was looking at him eagerly, hoping he'd say yes. But... "No, it's okay. Thank you so much anyway. I really do appreciate it!"

Xander's ears flattened out sadly. "Awww..."

"It's okay, Bartleby. It's your decision," Mrs. Oakley told him. She ran her elegant paw comfortingly along his thigh. "Do you already have someone else in mind you could stay with? Another relative?"

He shook his head. "No, just the bedroom I got when I came here. But I think I'll be okay by myself for a while. I kinda want to be alone now, you know? Just for a bit. Just so I can think things out and decide how I feel about everything."

Mrs. Oakley leaned over to nuzzle him in a motherly way. "That sounds very mature of you, Bartleby. But if you do decide to change your mind, our door's always open. You really are a polite, sweet little bat."

He blushed a bit. "Thank you." He turned back to Xander and wiggled up against him affectionately. "I promise I'll come over for lots of sleepovers though!"

That seemed to perk the little fox up again. He hugged his new friend. "Okay."

Bartleby nuzzled noses with him. However, he had one more thing on his mind. He looked solemnly at Mrs. Oakley. "Um, there was something else I was wondering about, but I don't know if it'll be rude to ask."

"It's okay, little one," she said. "You're new and full of questions, and that's perfectly all right. Ask away."

He appreciated her understanding, but he was still a little nervous. "Um... Well, Xander told me earlier that you all died together, and I was kinda wondering... what happened?" his tone was cautious, hoping this wasn't a taboo thing to ask in Hell.

The pretty vixen gave him a bittersweet smile. "No, Bartleby, you're not being rude. That's something most of us ask new people we meet. I suppose it's morbid curiosity, but it's a natural curiosity anyway." She looked to her son. "Would you like to tell him?"

The little fox nodded solemnly. "We, um... We died in a fire. Our house burned down."

"That's horrible!" Bartleby gasped.

Xander shrugged a little, as if to say, 'yeah, but at least it's in the past now'. "I was the only one who knew what happened. Mom and Dad passed out in their bed. I woke up and it was hotter than a furnace and there was this thick, oily grey smoke everywhere. I tried to run out of my room and find Mom and Dad, but I guess I breathed in too much smoke and I choked on it.

"Next thing I knew, Razielphustar was kneeling beside me and giving me a hug.

"The whole wall of the red room opened. Mom and dad were on the other side. We all ran to each other and hugged too.

"Razielphustar spent a long time talkin' to us and explaining everything. It took a while for us to adjust, especially to the yiffy stuff! I mean, we'd all been thinking separately about doing stuff like that with each other, but we didn't have any way to bring it up. Then we found out that down here, yiffing's totally okay, and so we got into it."

Mr. Oakley put his arms around his beloved son. "In some ways, I'd even consider us lucky. We're free to show affection for each other in any way we choose. We have a nice house and all the 'rich people stuff' we've always wanted. We don't have to work anymore. Xander goes to a good school..."

"...with the best teacher ever!" Xander pointed out.

Dad fluffled the little fox's hair. "Definitely. So, yeah, we are lucky in a lot of ways. Not the least of which being we get to share our bed with cute little bats like you!" He reached out to give Bartleby's sides a good tickling. Bartleby shrieked with laughter and curled up in a tiny ball of fur.

"Help, help!" he cried, grinning.

"I ain't gonna help you!" Xander said evilly. He wiggled his fingers and started tickling his bat friend too.

"Oh, why not?" Mrs. Oakley joined the bandwagon and added her own nimble fingers to Bartleby's tickle-torture.

The little bat cried and laughed and wiggled and thought he was gonna burst if this went on much longer!

He did get a reprieve, but it was from a rather unexpected source.

With a loud 'FWOOOSH!', a five-foot diameter pentacle suddenly appeared in flames on the Oakley's ceiling. The three foxes and their bat companion all stopped suddenly to look up and gawk. The circle of flames began to spin wildly, becoming a fiery vortex. A strange creature dropped clumsily out of it onto the bedroom floor. Then the pentacle-portal shrunk to a pinpoint, collapsed and disappeared.

The 'creature', once it had gotten itself up off the ground, actually turned out to be a robot. It looked like some kind of fantastical toy. It consisted of a thin silver cylinder with two long, tentacle-esque arms and a round red ball on top that split open to reveal a pair of yellow eyes. The robot abruptly sprouted a gold propeller out of its head, hovered up off the floor, and zoomed towards the surprised furries.

It pointed straight at Bartleby. "Alright buddy, you're coming with me!" it snarled menacingly.

Bartleby did not really feel all that menaced, mostly because the robot was barely a foot tall. "Excuse me?"

The robot giggled, bouncing mirthfully as it hovered. "Oh, sorry, I just love saying that!"

Xander snapped his fingers. "Oh, hey, it's a Summoner!"

"A what?" Bartleby and both of Xander's parents asked at the same time.

"It's a messenger robot," the little fox explained. "I heard they were gonna start using these now instead of imps."

Mr. Oakley grumbled. "Good! Those damn little things were annoying!"

Bartleby shook his head. "Still no idea what's going on."

"You ever seen a cartoon where a tiny angel and a devil show up on someone's shoulders?" Mr. Oakley asked.

Bartleby nodded.

"That's what an imp looks like. The little red devil, I mean. They're in charge of delivering messages throughout Hell."

"Not anymore, they're not!" the Summoner robot said grandly. "Our kind has replaced them! Satan was getting too many complaints, so he finally switched." It crossed its arms huffily. "Took him long enough. Two million years!"

So that's what that rude little thing on the devil's desk was! "And you're here to get me because...?" Bartleby cautiously asked the robot.

"Oh! Oh, yes, right." The little whizzing machine darted closer to the surprised bat. "You're due in the kitchens right now!"

"The kitchens!" Bartleby yelped. "Does that mean what I think it means?"

"Yup," Xander said enviously. "Yer gonna get cooked!"

"Oh dear," Mrs. Oakley said, putting a paws to her cheek. "And I was just about to invite you to stay as our dinner!"

Bartleby arched an eyebrow. She wanted to eat him? Well, it would be logical to assume it'd be as painless and impermanent as anything else he'd already gone through. He pictured himself crouched in a roasting pan, an apple in his mouth, pineapple rings on his tail, while three hungry foxes licked their lips. Strangely, the idea seemed rather exciting.

Xander was happy to see that look in Bartleby's eye. "It sounds kinda interesting, right? Gettin' cooked is a blast! You'll love it!" he said enthusiastically.

Mrs. Oakley thought a bit, putting a finger to her mouth and tapping her lips. "Hmmm... Well, I had planned on making some soup out of Jeff and having Bartleby for our main course, but I suppose I could always get out the meat grinder and make some boy lasagna!" she said, giving Xander's tummy a tickle.

"Oh boy! Yeah, great idea, Mom!"

The robot extended a shiny, segmented finger and tapped Bartleby lightly on the nose. "Sooo, little one, are you gonna come along quietly or do I have to use force?" it said in it's best 'gruff cop' voice (which really wasn't very good).

It seemed pointless to note that a bat could probably fly rings around this thing, or just swat it out of the air with one footclaw. Bartleby rolled his eyes. "Fine, fine, I'll go."

"What do you want to bet that in two weeks we'll miss the imps?" Mr. Oakley quipped casually.

The robot eyed him fiercely. "Hilarious. Really. I'm just doin' my job, buddy-boy!"

"Make that one week."

Steam poured out of the robot's dome and it trembled angrily in place. "Oooh!"

Bartleby gave Xander a long, tender hug. "I really wish I could stay, and maybe even be your food tonight, but I guess I'd better do what it says. I don't wanna get in trouble my first day."

Xander nodded sympathetically. "It's cool. We'll see each other tomorrow in class anyway."

Mr. and Mrs. Oakley added their warm fur to the hug too.

"We'll be happy to have you back any time, Bartleby," Mr. Oakley said.

"And I'm sure I'll be able to find a nice bat meat recipe by tomorrow," Mrs. Oakley added.

Bartleby grinned. "I'll do my best to get here so I can be in it!" he pledged happily.

They all shared a few goodbye kisses, then Bartleby stood up and walked off the bed. The robot extended an appendage and the little bat took it in his winghand. He waved to his new fox friends. "Bye! See you tomorrow!"

"Bye, Bartleby!" Xander said, waving back.

"Bye!" everyone said a few more times.

The robot turned to Bartleby, trying to look as comforting as its yellow plastic eyes could convey. "Sorry I hafta break up your fun, kid. It's just a job, y'know?"

Bartleby gave the odd little thing a smile. "It's okay. I understand."

"Alrighty then. Toodle-oo, folks! Heeeeeeeeere we go!" With that, a ring of screaming flame burst up through the carpet, spinning like a madman's carousel. It swallowed Bartleby and the robot up in a matter of seconds, leaving not a single fleck of ash behind as it vanished.

Xander got up to stare at the carpet his friend had disappeared through. "Dang, the imps didn't do that either!" he said, impressed.

Mrs. Oakley stretched her arms and yawned. "Well, lasagna does take a while to prepare. You should probably run down to the kitchen and help me get started, squirt."

Xander wagged his tail. "Can we use the blender again this time?" he begged like a puppy.

She rolled her eyes and chuckled. "Oh, I suppose!"

Xander gave her a huge hug. "Thanks! You're the best mom ever!"


	*   *   *   *   *


-CHAPTER EIGHT-

"Here we are! Next stop; Chattanooga, Kookamonga, Albuquerque and all points heading south!!" the robot hollered kiddingly.

The flames seemed to swirl for only a second before Bartleby found himself standing in easily the largest kitchen he could have imagined. It looked as big as a basketball arena Hundreds of fursons were gleefully cooking hundreds of other fursons, all enjoying themselves equally.

There were enormous deli slicers that could turn a giggling little cub into lunchmeat in a matter of minutes. Barbecue pits with spitted children turning over fiery coals with contented smiles on their muzzles. Bathtub-sized cookpots suspended over open flames with fursons splashing about and smiling in the steamy water. Ovens with transparent doors so the food could hold a conversation with their preparer while they cooked. Oversize blenders running at top speed with grinning kits willingly diving into them and splatting all over the place. Vast stretches of grills where fursons rolled about, laughing at the tickling sensations as they sizzled. Giant gleaming pots and pans on flaming ranges with happy cubs peeking out over the sides.

Everyone, without any exception that he could see, looked like they were having the time of their lives.

"Coooool!" said Bartleby, completely awestruck.

The robot seemed happy. "Oh, good! Some kids get all freaked out when they see Hell's kitchen for the first time."

"I thought that was in Manhattan," Bartleby joked.

"Ha ha. I am rolling on the floor in mirth," the robot deadpanned. "Like we *don't* hear that one a dozen times a day..."

Bartleby shrugged. "Sorry."

The odd little contraption examined one of its 'wrists', despite there not actually being a watch there. "Oh wow. Lookit the time! I gotta get off on my next assignment." It tipped young Bartleby a snappy salute. "See ya round, kid!"

"Bye!" Bartleby said and waved.

"Have fun!" the robot wished. An instant later, a tiny tornado of fire popped up and whooshed him away to the next stop on his rounds.

The little bat watched him go, fascinated.

Suddenly, a booming voice startled him from behind. "Are you Bartleby?"

He whirled around...

And beheld the fattest squirrel he had ever seen.

A vast ocean of red-brown fur, a huge creamy tummy over legs so short they might not really have been there at all, big feet, an even bigger tail, a stretched apron featuring a smiling cartoon kitten sitting in a stewpot (and the caption 'Cubs Are For Cooking!'), arms thick as phone books, two big ol' buckteeth, a wide brown nose, two mischievously playful eyes, and a ridiculously big and poofy white chef's hat.

"Hi! I'm Roy! I'll be your chef for today!" he said jauntily.

Bartleby just kept staring for a moment.

Roy smiled warmly. He waddled over like a penguin and patted the boy's headfur. "Come on over here, little guy. My goodness, aren't you cute! I'll bet you're delicious. I heard it was your first day. Have you, or any part of you, already been eaten?"

"Uh, uh, uh..." Bartleby tried to figure out what to respond too first.

Roy just chuckled. He led Bartleby over to a vacant spot of the kitchen, where cub-cooking apparatus awaited. "Sorry if I overwhelmed you. I am kind of a chatterbox."

"That's okay," Bartleby finally got out. "Okay, um, thanks for saying I'm cute; I don't know if I'm delicious or not; it is my first day; and no, I haven't been eaten yet. But I did watch a friend get swallowed by a snake, and I did get beheaded earlier. So I'm not scared of being cooked."

The jolly squirrel easily lifted the little bat up into his arms for an abrupt, warm 'n squashy hug. Bartleby giggled. "That's wonderful! Not only is your short-term memory impressive, but I'm also really glad you're not scared. There really isn't anything to be afraid of, of course. None of this will hurt a bit."

"I know," Bartleby said. Roy sat him down on a white marble countertop. The young bat enjoyed the cool smoothness on his bare tush. "I even got my sausage 'n eggs cut off earlier. Twice, even! And it felt great!"

Roy was delighted. He checked out Bartleby's boybits. "Oooh! Mmm, those do look tasty. I'm tempted to eat 'em up myself!"

Bartleby blushed. He felt oddly flattered by the compliment. "Twice is enough for one day."

The immense squirrel 'tsk tsk'ed good-naturedly. "Aww, too bad."

"So, um, why'd I get summoned here?" Bartleby asked. "Did someone want to eat me specifically?"

Roy nodded. "Smart, too! Yes indeedy. We got a special order for one succulent little grey bat named Bartleby, to be prepared for early dinner posthaste."

"How am I gonna get cooked?" Bartleby asked. It was surprising even to him how easily he was accepting this. It occurred to him that just days ago, when he'd still been alive, if someone had told him they wanted to cook him and eat him, he would have freaked out and tried desperately to escape. Now, it kinda felt like one of the rare times when he'd awakened in a dream just enough to realize he was dreaming. He went along with whatever surreal things were happening because he knew nothing could really hurt him.

Roy had been sizing up the young, tender bat for quite some time, stroking his chinfur thoughtfully. "I think I have an idea. Something I haven't tried in a while. How'd you like to be deep fried?"

Bartleby stiffened up a bit. That sounded a bit scary, but he did his best to remind himself that it really wasn't. "Okay, I guess."

The big squirrel patted him on the leg. "Don't worry, sweetie. It won't hurt. I'll take good care of you and make sure everything feels really nice, I promise." His tone was boundlessly caring. He'd been soothing nervous furs for a very long time now, and had gotten quite good at it.

Bartleby enjoyed the reassurance. "Okay. What do I have to do?"

Roy pushed some buttons on a keypad set into the wall of his kitchen station. Within seconds, a loud mechanical whine sprung up and the whole countertop transformed. 'Just like a secret agent's hideout!' bartleby thought. Tiles flipped over, cupboards opened, control panels popped up. A big slab of the marble slid away to reveal a Bartleby-sized frying pit, already full of steaming, bubbly hot oil, ready to go.

Roy motioned for Bartleby to stand up. "Over here, little guy. Skootch over a bit..." He positioned the little bat directly over a large, glowing green circle. "Perfect. Hold still." He held his finger over a big red button. "Say cheese!"

"Limburger!" Bartleby said with a grin.

Roy pushed the button. There was a flash of intense neon green light. And when Bartleby opened his eyes, he was completely, utterly, absolutely _bald_. "Yikes!"

"Oh, you look cute like that!" Roy said truthfully. Without any fur, Bartleby did look a bit more like the meal he was about to become.

"Weird..." Bartleby said. He inspected his furless form all over. No fuzz on his wings, no hair dangling in his eyes, no fluff around his boybits. Not even his eyebrows had been spared. "It'll grow back, right?" he asked nervously.

"Of course!" Roy said instantly. "There's nothing to worry about. As soon as you get done being eaten, just wish your fur back, and *ping*! Back to normal!"

Bartleby was rather glad to hear that. "Oh, okay. What now?"

A cupboard opened and a robotic hand offered Roy a big bowl of boy batter. "Ah. Perfect." Another machine spread out a length of wax paper over the counter. "Come here, Bartleby. Lay down, get comfortable. Try to keep still. I'm going to rub this stuff all over you."

Bartleby did as he was told. He laid down on the paper, finding it a very strange sensation to be feeling it with no fur in the way. Roy's big paws spread the thick, sloppy batter onto Bartleby's tummy. The little bat giggled. It felt really nice, like playing in the mud. Roy was very gentle, obviously having had lots of experience cooking little kids. He did everything he could to make Bartleby feel relaxed and content.

The sweet-smelling batter spreading all over his furless young body make Bartleby murr in pleasure. It felt so cool and messy! He wished he was sinking into a swimming pool full of the stuff. After Roy covered his face in it, Bartleby discretely took a taste and found it to be quite yummy.

Last but not least, Roy lobbed a big blob onto Bartleby's erect penis. The little bat shivered and giggled. Roy definitely enjoyed coating the little cutie's privates in batter. He knew they'd fry up beautifully.

Roy pulled on a pair of elbow-length rubber gloves. "Alright, sweetie. Time for the fryer. It's gonna seem scary, but don't you worry. If it feels even a little bit uncomfortable, I'll have you out of there in a heartbeat."

Bartleby smiled warmly. Roy's voice was full of true concern. Bartleby trusted that the big squirrel knew exactly what he was doing. "I'm ready."

Roy lifted him up easily and held him over a basket like what Bartleby had seen being used in fast food restaurants before. 'He's gonna put me in that thing and I'm gonna get lowered into that hot oil and cooked! Cooked just like a bunch of french fries!' he thought with a grin. It made him shiver in deliciously hair-raising excitement.

"Pull your legs up to your chest, little guy," Roy instructed, and Bartleby obeyed. "That's it. Now wrap your wings around yourself. Good, good. Tuck your tail in. Put your ears down... Perfect! Okay, sweetie, hold that pose!" He picked up the battered little bat and slowly lowered him into the fry basket. It was a perfect fit. "Now, keep your eyes closed or it might sting a little. Don't try to breathe. You won't need to anyway. Just keep as still as you can and it'll feel really good. Okay?"

Bartleby gave a tiny nod. "Okay!"

"Good boy!" Roy picked up the basket and held it over the fryer. "Here we go, little guy. Thank you for being so cooperative."

"Thank you for being so nice to me," Bartleby replied.

"Thank you for being so cute!" Roy countered. "Bye bye, little bat. In we go..."

He felt it first on his tail. The oil was hotter than anything Bartleby had ever felt before! He cried out in surprise as that incredible heat traveled up his butt and his feet, over his boybits, up his legs, across his wings, and finally up over his head as well. He was completely immersed in the scalding hot oil. He could feel it actually *cooking* him all over. Changing him into food. He was being cooked!

And to his great relief, it *did* feel good. More than that, it felt incredible! The only thing he could compare it to was that time when he'd slept over at his friend Sammy's house and he'd gotten to try the pulsating massage shower head when he got cleaned up before bedtime. But even that was a trifling similarity. Being deep-fried was a thousand times more intense. It was amazing in and of itself that such a feeling could be so extreme and still not be the slightest bit painful.

The tingling, rippling, penetrating sensation bored deep through the little bat to his core. He was being cooked. He could actually feel and sense the rapid transformation of his young body into meat. He was turning into food. Something tasty to eat. He felt so excited, wondering who had requested him and how they were going to gobble him up. He hoped he'd taste good.

After much too short a time, Roy was lifting him up out of the fryer again. Bartleby was sorely disappointed. Like when he was having fun swimming and his mom made him come in and dry off.

The big squirrel hung the fry basket on the side of a metal pan to collect all the oil and juices that were dripping off the little bat's succulent body. Roy inhaled a deep whiff and clapped his paws to his mouth. "Magnifico! Oh, Bartleby! You smell wonderful!" He carefully peeled away just enough of the cooked batter from around Bartleby's nose and mouth so he could speak and enjoy the delectable aroma as well.

Bartleby took in a deep breath of fresh air. He hadn't even noticed he hadn't been breathing for several minutes. The odor hit his nose and stirred countless happy memories of carnivals and state fairs. "Mmmm! I smell like a giant corn dog!" he realized.

"That's essentially what you are. Without the popsicle stick up your butt, of course," Roy pointed out. "Or a 'corn bat', at least."

Bartleby chuckled. "That's kinda corny right there."

Roy laughed too. "I could make a 'cornhole' joke, but that'd be stretching it. Anyway, you're cooked to perfection, my dear boy. Time to get you served up and sitting on a plate!"

"Oh boy!" Bartleby smiled. He tried to figure out what was happening as he was lifted out of the fry basket and placed on a plate. He still had batter over his eyes, so he couldn't see what else Roy was adding. Some kind of side dish, probably.

He tried to move and found he couldn't. Not only had the yummy-smelling batter formed a tight shell all around him, but his muscles had turned into meat and he was barely able to move them at all. He didn't mind though. He wasn't afraid. He got the sense somehow that, even now, if he really got frightened and wanted to back out, he could simply wish his body back to normal and Roy would be happy to let him go. Knowing that it was really him that was in control of the situation helped a lot to make it not scary.

"Dee-lish!" Roy exclaimed. "One piping hot corn-dog boy with a side of fries and coleslaw, plus a twelve hundred ounce Mr. Pibb. Whoever ordered you is in for a real treat!"

"Thanks, Roy! I hope I can come back here and get cooked again someday. Maybe you can even eat me yourself."

The big squirrel lovingly gave the cooked little bat an eskimo kiss. "I'd like that very much, my adorable little entree. Hopefully I'll see you again someday soon."

He picked up the platter of battered bat and brought it out to the main eating area. It was a vast cafeteria. Ordinary-looking enough, except for the fact that it was nearly as wide as an entire city block. A phalanx of buffet islands lined the wall outside the kitchen, full of the usual salads and side dishes, but also lots of happily cooked fursons.

Several islands simply had little boys and girls sitting naked on beds of lettuce. Customers could come up and ask for whatever part of them they wanted to eat, and the happy cubs would slice it off themselves and serve it with a smile, only to regrow it a moment later in case another customer was hungry for the same thing.

Roy handed Bartleby's tray off to a whippy weasel waiter, who took it one handed and scurried skillfully off through the maze of noisily eating diners. With practiced ease, he found the demon who'd ordered the fried boy and set Bartleby down in front of him. "Bon appetit!"

The demon nodded to him. He licked his lips at the absolutely mouthwatering aroma.

"Hello?" Bartleby said. "Is someone there?"

"Yes indeed. Someone who is quite hungry and who thinks you look positively scrumptious!"

That voice sounded familiar...

The demon peeled away a section of batter over Bartleby's eyes so the boy could see who was about to eat him. He popped the batter in his mouth and 'Mmm!'ed appreciatively.

Bartleby blinked a few crumbs away and saw who was sitting across from him.

"Razielphustar!!" he shouted joyfully.

		***

"The one and the same!" the squirreldemon replied merrily. "Oh, I must say, I haven't even taken a bite of you yet and already my mouth is watering!"

"Oh cool! You ordered me? Wow, it's great to see you again! I've been having so much fun!" Bartleby burst out all at once.

Razielphustar brightened, giving the boy a very warm smile. "Really? I'm so happy to hear that! Good for you! I hope I didn't interrupt anything when I summoned you."

"Well, kinda," Bartleby admitted. "But getting cooked more than made up for it! It felt *sooo* good! I was totally surprised. And Roy, the guy who fried me up, was really nice too."

The squirreldemon could not have been more pleased to see the shy, frightened little bat from just hours ago transformed into this excited, effervescent, brightly smiling batter-covered treat. "I am so happy for you, little one," he said sincerely. "I was getting a break anyway, and I thought this way I could check up on you and get to taste you at the same time. Killing two bats with one stone, so to speak. Why don't you tell me all about your adventures while I get started on my meal, hmm?"

Bartleby nodded. He watched in fascination as Razielphustar easily pulled off a piece of his wing and began nibbling on it. He'd barely even felt it. There was a pleasant 'snap', and then he simply couldn't feel where it had been anymore. The hungry demon pulled another piece of wing off with the same results. Bartleby smiled. This felt nice!

"You can't possibly be enjoying this as much as I'm enjoying you," Razielphustar said through a full mouth, eyes closed in ecstacy. "You are ambrosia, my dear boy! Food of the gods!"

Bartleby giggled. "I'm just a big corn dog," he said modestly.

"True, but any meal tastes much, much better when it is happy to be eaten." He chewed and swallowed another mouthful of the wonderful boy meat. "Now, tell me, where did that tunnel I dropped you down end up leading?"

"You mean, you didn't know?!" the young bat blurted.

"Well, I knew it would take you to the school, but it was up to them which class you were put in," he clarified while sawing off one of Bartleby's feet with knife and fork. "Which teacher were you assigned to?"

Bartleby grinned. "Mrs. Schaddenfreude."

Razielphustar's eyebrows went way up. "Irweena Schaddenfreude? Oh, Bartleby, you are so lucky!"

'I seem to be hearing that a lot today,' the little bat thought. "Believe me, I know! She's really cool!"

"I imagine you got punished quite severely for being late to class?" the demon asked knowingly, munching on a mouthful of bat foot. Bartleby's toes were exquisite!

The little bat giggled. "Yup! She gave me a good spanking and chopped my cock right off! Later on, she even used a guillotine on me!"

Razielphustar chuckled, imagining his new young friend willingly popping his head through the lunette, little grey tail wagging. "I'll bet that was fun. Irweena is one of the best teachers I've ever encountered. She taught kids like you for forty-seven years back when she was alive. A month after she retired, she passed away in her sleep. She told me she practically willed it to happen. She said she didn't care about living any longer if she couldn't keep on making cubs happy and helping them learn."

"Wow," Bartleby said, duly impressed.

The squirreldemon sliced off a juicy cut of Bartleby's left leg. "I told you I usually console only children, but I requested to welcome her personally, just because I saw her Life Profile and she impressed me so much. Not surprisingly, her big reason for getting the boot from The Big Guy was that she enjoyed punishing her students too much. And, of course, they enjoyed it too much too!"

He chuckled. "I can imagine. She seemed like she's gotten lots of practice!"

Razielphustar nodded. He knew Mrs. Schaddenfreude's true age was somewhere around two hundred or so by now, but out of politeness he did not mention this to Bartleby. He took another bite of Bartleby's steaming hot thigh meat. "So, have you made any new friends so far?"

The little corn-bat grinned. "Oh, yeah! This kid sitting next to me in class started passing me notes and we ended up having a long conversation about all sorts of stuff. He helped me out understanding how some stuff works down here. His name's Xander. Mrs. S. caught him passing notes and she blew him up with a hand grenade. He didn't mind though!"

The squirreldemon laughed out loud. He remembered Xander well, and that did sound like something the adventurous little fox would get a kick out of. He sliced off a mouth-watering portion of Bartleby's succulent rump.

The little bat wriggled gleefully at the sensation. "I also met a girl named Lexi, but that was only for a little bit before she got gulped by a big python."

The squirreldemon nodded. "I imagine she must have enjoyed that quite a bit."

"Yup!" Bartleby was enjoying himself, too. Watching Razielphustar eating parts of him was creating a wide variety of sensations. It felt incredibly pleasurable, and he liked seeing his demon friend so happy. And there was even a tiny bit of creeped-outedness in the back of his mind, to know that his own body was being carved up for food, that added an interesting twinge of excitement to the whole shebang.

"After Lexi got eaten, Xander took me to this butcher shop on the way over to his house and we both got our penises chopped off! It felt really cool!"

Razielphustar was impressed with the lad's bravery. "I'll bet they sold pretty quick. I'm saving yours till last, little one," he said.

Ooooh... Just the thought that this handsome demon wanted to eat his naughty bits made Bartleby excited. "I went over to Xander's house for a while. And me and his mom 'n dad all got together in their bed and yiffed!"

"Really?" Razielphustar asked, gently sawing off Bartleby's left wing at the shoulder and then taking a huge bite. "What did you think of it?"

The little bat murred just remembering it. "It was wonderful! Better than I could've hoped for. It was really nice and fun and playful. Nothing like I thought it was gonna be." He hesitated a bit, grinning bashfully. "And, um, Xander said he got yiffy with you once too."

The demon nodded. "Indeed. More than once actually. He's a frisky little fox." He paused for a moment, then his tone became more earnest. "Would you like for me to be yiffy with you too, sweet boy?" he asked gently.

In his voice, Bartleby heard not a drop of coercion. Razielphustar was not trying to influence him or rush him at all. He wanted to know if that was what the boy truly, honestly wanted. Bartleby was happy to say, softly, "Yes."

Razielphustar gave him a light kiss on the nose. "I'd love to as well. You are such a handsome little bat. I would love to hold you in my arms and make you feel good," he said tenderly.

Bartleby cooed. He felt tingles all through his fur. "You're already making me feel good..."

"You like being eaten up?" the demon asked.

"Yeah!" he eagerly replied.

Razielphustar chuckled and patted the boy on the head, then plucked off one of the boy's large ears to eat. "I'm certainly savoring the experience too. You are absolutely delicious, my delightful dinner-boy. You make my tastebuds sing!" He gestured to his plate. "Would you like a taste?"

Self-cannibalism? Bartleby considered the idea. Strange, yes, but he couldn't think of a reason why not. He did smell pretty darn yummy after all. "Okay." Razielphustar held out the boy's ear to him and Bartleby took a bite. "Mmmmmm!" His eyebrows went up in surprise. "Wow, it's just like one of those elephant ears they sell at the state fair!"

Razielphustar perked up. "Say, that gives me an idea..." He reached into the infinite carry-all space inside his vest and produced a shaker full of brown sugar and cinnamon. "Capital suggestion, Bartleby!" He liberally sprinkled both the boy's ears with the sweet stuff, then tucked in with gusto. "Fantastic!"

"Oh, gimme another bite, please!" Bartleby asked. The demon was happy to oblige. Bartleby was seriously impressed! "Dang, I do taste good!"

Their conversation was halted as the two of them concentrated solely on relishing the tasty treat Bartleby had become. Razielphustar fed the little bat happily, loving the expression on his young friend's face as he enjoyed himself.

A demon's appetite is much different than a mortal's. They can gobble up a little boy in the time it would take an average furson to finish off a fairly large hamburger. Razielphustar made sure to let Bartleby sample any part of him he wanted, but did most of the devouring himself. Soon, all that was left was Bartleby's head, attached by a loose strand of skin to his boybits (so he could still feel them).

"Time for dessert," Razielphustar said slyly.

Bartleby chirred in anticipation. "Yeah! Eat 'em up!"

The squirreldemon raised the boy's adorable batter-dipped privates to his lips and gave them a single tiny kiss. Seeing his young friend so excited and happy was wonderful. "I love you, sweet boy," he said warmly.

"I love you too," Bartleby replied. "Now hurry up and eat my stuff!"

Razielphustar chuckled. "Patience is a virtue, you know. Good thing we're in Hell..." with that, he took a dainty bite from the base of Bartleby's shaft.

The little disembodied boy head rolled about on the table in ecstacy. He squirmed and cooed and moaned as Razielphustar oh-so-slowly gobbled up his savory genitals.

The demon bit off the little bat's cocktip with a snap of his jaws, sending Bartleby into a long, low whimper of pleasure. He popped the two little boy balls into his mouth and chewed them up like cherries.

It had felt as intense and pleasurable as any orgasm. "Oh wow...! Thank you so much!" Bartleby said breathlessly.

"The pleasure was all mine," Razielphustar said, giving the boy a loving pat on the cheek.

"I guess twice *wasn't* enough," Bartleby mused.

"Hmmm?"

"Oh, never mind." He smiled. "So, um, what's gonna happen to me once you're all done eating me?"

The squirreldemon hesitated. This might gross him out a bit, but he was fairly sure the boy would be able to deal with it. "Well, essentially, the same thing that happens to any food you eat..."

Bartleby puzzled that over a bit, then came to the obvious conclusion. "I'm gonna turn into poop!?"

Razielphustar nodded. "Indeed, little one. But it only lasts as long as you want it to. When I, erm, 'evacuate' you, you'll go into another portal and be transported somewhere else. Probably at random, which is always fun."

Bartleby supposed too that he could probably just grow a new body right now if he wanted. But what he wanted most of all was to find out what it would feel like to have all of him inside Razielphustar's tummy at once. "Alright. I guess I can deal with that. Go on then, eat me up."

"Are you sure?" Razielphustar asked, picking up the battered boy head and giving him a concerned look. "You don't have to. You could just-"

"I know," Bartleby interrupted. "It's okay. I really want you to eat all of me."

The demon gave the boy an appreciative nuzzle. "You're a sweetheart, Bartleby. And it's very brave of you to be so willing to try things you're unsure of. Thank you so much for being such a magnificent meal."

"Thank you for being a magnificent eater," he replied.

They shared a chuckle. "Okay, down the hatch. I'll try my best to see you again later. You know I'll be looking forward to it."

"I will too. Um... can we get yiffy?" Bartleby asked shyly.

"Darling boy, we can be as yiffy as you like," the squirreldemon assured. He gave Bartleby a long, slow, loving kiss. The young bat returned the emotion without hesitation.

"Auf wiedersehen," said Razielphustar. "Je t'aime..." With that, he opened his mouth as wide as he could, even unhinging his jaw like a snake, and popped the last of Bartleby inside.

Bartleby got gulped. He felt the muscles of Razielphustar's throat pulling down on him, then finally letting him splash down into the stomach. 'Yuck!' he thought. 'I'm swimming in a puddle of myself!' It was pretty gross, but it was also nice and warm. And surprisingly cozy.

A demon's stomach acid is powerful stuff. Within a matter of moments, Bartleby was no more.

		***

Razielphustar stood up and enjoyed a good stretch. Too bad he didn't have time to score a nap after such a filling, and fulfilling, dinner. He was positively delighted to see Bartleby adjusting so well. The little bat seemed like a totally different furson from when they'd first met. Some cubs took years to allow themselves to relax and accept that they were truly safe here and that nothing could ever harm them. Bartleby had embraced the concept in a flash. Razielphustar was exceedingly proud of him.

His demonic digestive system was a marvel of efficiency. By the time he'd walked to the nearest restroom, Bartleby was already ready to come out.

The squirreldemon chose a stall and sat down. He bent over, grunted, and did his dooty.

"Bon voyage, Bartleby," he called out as he flushed.


	*   *   *   *   *


-CHAPTER NINE-

The worst part of being turned into a turd was definitely just knowing that he had been. Like everything else in Hell, it had felt rather pleasant (if mentally uncomfortable). One moment he was surrounded by warm living tissue, the next he was rocketing along through a chilly waterslide of plumbing.

A portal snapped into being just ahead of him, and Bartleby was swept along into it.

		***

The first thing he noticed was that he was back in his old body. Everything seemed to be in tip-top shape.

The second thing he noticed was that he was falling again.

Before he could catch the wind this time, he reached his destination. He crashed spectacularly in an overflowing dumpster full of stinky trash bags.

The little bat sat up and shook his head a bit to clear it. The garbage had done a good job of cushioning his fall, so he was none the worse for wear. He was, however, rather grossed out to be finding himself waist-deep in a huge pile of moist, smelly plastic bags. "Eeeewww..."

He looked around and found himself in a fairly average red brick alley, the mouth of which opened onto a quiet little city street. Not a big city or an especially small one. Just about medium. Cars or pedestrians would occasionally pass by.

A loud rustling sound came from somewhere beneath the trash behind him. Bartleby got himself turned around just in time to see another young cub emerge from the refuse like a prairie dog popping out of her burrow.

She was a feline, a year or two older than Bartleby. Her hair was abundant and messy, almost exactly the same color as tarnished copper. Her fur pattern was that of a calico; dominantly white with jellybean-shaped patches of black and orange. She was wearing large wire-rim glasses, a blue T-shirt and white denim shorts, along with a confettiesque collection of trash bits stuck to her all over the place.

She looked both nerdy and pretty at the same time, like the standard bookwormy best friend archetype in most teen horror movies. She regarded Bartleby quizzically.

Bartleby regarded her as well.

"So, did you just drop out of the sky, or are you a fan of dumpster diving too?" she asked pleasantly. Her voice was clear and clever.

"I fell out of a portal," Bartleby said, then grimaced. "And you *like* being in here?"

"Sure!" she said, as if that was the most obvious thing in the world. "Trash is fun to play in! Haven't you ever peeked in a wastebasket and seen something interesting in there and yanked it out when no one was looking? I find great stuff in here all the time!"

Bartleby had to admit, she had a point. It was probably a universal kid thing to at least be mildly interested with things that had been thrown away. "Okay, yeah. I found a pretty decent bunch of comic books in a trash can once. But it smells bad in here!" he said, putting a winghand over his nose.

She giggled. "That's the best part!" She took in a deep, euphoric breath. "Ah... I love the smell of garbage in the morning!" she said, despite it being late afternoon in this part of Hell.

"Suit yourself," Bartleby shrugged. He tentatively took another sniff, and it didn't seem as nasty this time. Sure, it was the rotten reek of spoiled food and dirty garbage, but it seemed to almost be trying to help him get used to it, oddly enough.

The calico kitten waded through the big bulky black and white bags to give him a pawshake. "I'm Gillian."

"Bartleby," he said, with a shake of her paw. "I just got dumped."

Her ears drooped sadly. "Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that! Were you together for very long?"

It took him a second to figure out that she'd misunderstood him. "No! Not 'dumped', _dumped_. I got deep fried and eaten by my friend Razielphustar. He pooped me out and somehow I wound up here."

"Ohhhh! Sorry!" She giggled cutely. "Random portals are fun, huh? They take you to all sortsa neat places you might never have known about otherwise. Are you new? You seem kinda new," she queried.

He nodded. "Just got here today. Hit by a car," he added softly. "Did you, like, get squished in a garbage truck or something?"

Gillian grinned enthusiastically. "I *wish*! But naw, it wasn't that cool of a death. I just tripped and fell in the pool in our backyard."

"You couldn't swim?"

"No, it was empty."

Bartleby cringed, imagining the 'thud' of a cub falling and smacking into that unyielding surface. "Gosh, I'm sorry," he said sincerely.

She appreciated his concern, but smiled anyway. "It's okay. It was a long time ago. And it was over in a second anyway. It was just 'Whoops!' - bonk - wind up in the red room. The worst part's just knowing that my mom and dad probably blame themselves for it happening. It was all totally my fault though. I'm a born klutz. When they get here, I'm gonna give 'em lots and lots of hugs so they'll know I don't blame them a bit."

Bartleby nodded solemnly. He could barely even imagine what his family must have been going through by now. Dad would probably go to jail. Mom would end up having to take care of three kids all by herself. Chuck would undoubtedly step up to the responsibility of being the lone 'man of the house' now. Tricia wouldn't show many outward signs, but it would wound her deeply nonetheless. And he imagined little Mandy would probably cry the most over losing her big brother...

Gillian was a perceptive girl. She could see from the sad, faraway look in Bartleby's eyes that this was too raw and fresh a wound for him to want to talk about just yet. She searched for a different topic to steer the conversation to. "Um, so... I hope I don't stink too bad," she said apologetically.

"Oh, it's okay. I don't mind," Bartleby said, and meant it. It always made him feel a bit better to help someone else feel better. "I'm getting used to it pretty quick. Yeah, I'm in a dumpster, but it's not as bad as I'd imagined."

She was glad to hear that. "Oh good. Some of my friends think I'm nuts for trash-hopping. But to me, there's nothing more relaxing than burrowing down deep in a big ol' dumpster and feeling all those warm bags surrounding me!" She hugged herself and smiled brightly.

Admittedly, this girl did seem a tad nuts, but Bartleby wasn't about to begrudge her something that made her so happy. Razielphustar's wisdom was coming up again. The young bat wouldn't want to be judged for his own pleasures, so it would be rude of him to judge others.

And really, the grossest part of the whole experience was psychological. The bags were actually soft and sort of comfy to sit in. They crinkled pleasantly when he moved around. The worst part was just imagining what might be in them.

The lithe little cat easily read his expression again. "Go on, rip open a bag," she suggested slyly. "I guarantee you'll find something interesting."

Bartleby arched an eyebrow. "I don't think so!"

She giggled. "This isn't normal trash, yannow," she explained. "Even I'd be a little wary about jumping into some random city dumpster. No, this one's mine, and all this is special garbage. It's psycho-reactive," she enunciated smartly.

"Psycho-what?" Bartleby asked.

"Like your room. I assume you got a room as soon as you got here, right?" Bartleby nodded. "And it read your thoughts to make it all perfect, right?" Another nod. "Same thing with my magic dumpster. It changes itself to whatever I want, but it's still random enough that it's fun to explore. Go ahead! Pick a bag and root around in it!"

Bartleby was more hesitant about this than getting his cock chopped off. But he paused then. That last thought struck him, and he considered the matter further. He had, just a little while ago, gleefully agreed to being deep-fried and eaten alive. What was a little trash-picking compared to that? Shrugging, he picked out a medium-sized white plastic bag and tore it open with his footclaws.

Gillian came closer and bumped into her new bat friend, shoulder-to-shoulder. She peeked into the bag along with him. "Ooh, whadja get?"

Not really very hopeful, Bartleby stretched open the plastic and picked at the trash inside. She was right, there wasn't anything too gross. No syringes or used tampons or diapers or stuff like that. Some paper towels and food wrappers, crumpled up paper, tin cans, a banana peel. Yucky, yes, but nothing too awful. And then...

Bartleby's eyes lit up. There at the bottom of the bag was a collection of top-of-the-line art markers! He'd seen some just like these at the art supply store the last time he'd gone. He'd thought they would have been perfect for finishing up some of his drawings, but they were *way* too expensive.

They were probably all used up though. Why else would they be in the trash? Not expecting any results, Bartleby uncapped a red one and tested it on a scrap of notebook paper. To his utter amazement, it worked just fine! "Oh, cool!" he cried.

Gillian grinned, happy to have been proven right. "See what I mean? I always find cool stuff when I root around in here, and it's never anything I'd expect!" She gave the side of the dumpster a firm, friendly pat, making a thunderous rumble. "My dumpster never lets me down!"

Bartleby had to admit, the trash-nut was right. "Okay, dumpster diving *is* kinda cool," he admitted. "But where am I gonna put these? I don't have anything to carry them in at the moment..." he said with a blush.

She realized what he meant. He was still quite naked. "Oooohhh... Naughty..." she purred. "I'd manifest some clothes if I were you. Trash-hopping isn't quite as fun in the nude. ...Unless you're really kinky about it." And her grin suggested that, on occasion, she was.

Figuring it to be the same general idea of getting his boybits back, or changing cheese doodles into gummi worms, Bartleby pictured one of his T-shirts and a pair of shorts in his mind. A second later, he felt a flutter of fabric spread over him. When he looked, he was wearing his usual oversize red shirt and blue jean cutoffs. He'd done it all by himself, with no one to tell him how. "Neat!" he said, feeling proud of how well he was adapting to his afterlife.

"And if you wanna store those markers someplace safe, just do this," Gillian instructed. She took Bartleby's 'hand' in hers and extended his 'pointer finger'. "Now, make a move like you're gonna poke a hole in something, like a bubblegum bubble."

A tad skeptical, Bartleby did as she said. To his complete surprise, his wing digit stretched the very air in front of it and tore a small hole! "Whoa!" Bartleby tugged on the tear and widened it to the size of a cup coaster. Darkness swirled inside like one of the portals. "It's like all those sci fi shows where they talk about 'ripping a hole in the very fabric of space and time'."

"Exactly!" Gillian agreed. "You can make that hole show up anytime you want, and whatever you put in there will go right to your room and be waiting for you when you get there."

"Sweet!!" Grinning, Bartleby gathered up his new set of markers and had fun pushing them one by one into the little vortex. It swallowed them up like dropping them into a bowl of soup. When he was finished, the tear sealed itself up and Bartleby couldn't even tell where it had been anymore.

Bartleby's sensitive ears twitched. "Sounds like a garbage truck's coming," he said, noticing the distinctive rumble of the engine.

Gillian lit up like a christmas tree. "Oh good! You'll get to meet Mrs. Mackenzie! She's the best garbagewoman in the world, and one of my best friends!" she said exuberantly.

A few moments later, both of them could clearly hear the growl of the truck's engine approaching. It passed right by them for only a moment, then let out a loud 'beep beep beep' as it backed up into the mouth of the alley. The bulk of the huge green machine nearly blocked out the sun. The truck idled down and Mrs. Mackenzie stepped out.

She was a trim, athletic mink in her mid '20s. Her fur was caramel-colored, with fiery red hair and dark green eyes. She was wearing a blue baseball cap, big brown leather work gloves and a smudged green jumpsuit that somehow managed to look sexy on her.

"Gillian!" she shouted. She hustled over and scooped up the little kitten in her arms. The two of them hugged fondly. "I've been waitin' all day to pick you up! Who's your friend?"

"This is Barry," Gillian introduced.

"_Bartleby_," the little bat corrected.

"Oops, sorry!" she giggled.

Mrs. Mackenzie ambled over to tussle his headfur. "You're a cute little thing! Now why would anyone want to throw a handsome young bat like you away?" Her voice was instantly friendly, with a sweet honeyed touch of a southern accent.

Bartleby giggled. "Thank you! I'm not sure how I ended up in here, but I'm starting to get glad that I did!"

The friendly trash collector tipped him a wink and a smile. "Loretta Mackenzie. Pleased to meetcha, Bartleby."

"Likewise," he said gentlemanly.

Gillian gave her grown-up friend another squeeze, then hopped down into the dumpster again. "So, Bartleby, wanna come to the dump with me for a while? It's a lot of fun!"

He considered the idea. It'd probably be pretty stinky there. But he might find more cool stuff. And riding in a garbage truck sounded pretty neat, he was slightly surprised to realize. "Sure, why not?" he said with a shrug.

Gillian leapt at him and hugged him like a beartrap. "All right!! Thanks, Bartleby! It's so cool to meet someone who doesn't think I'm a total weirdo for liking trash! Just give the dump a chance, that's all I ask. You might end up liking it a whole lot more than you ever expected!"

He nuzzled her cheek, happy to make a new friend. "Okay, I'll be open-minded. Everything else's been a blast so far!"

Mrs. Mackenzie seemed very pleased as well to have him coming along. "Happy to have you join us, Bartleby. Garbage takes some getting used to, but it is a lot of fun. I was a garbageman for twenty years before I got sick and ended up here. Never even thought about stopping. Got my own custom truck now and no set schedule! I couldn't ask for more!"

The affable mink patted Gillian on the back. "Wanna help me get all this stinky trash loaded up?"

"Always!" the little calico happily agreed. Mrs. Mackenzie pulled a big black lever on her truck and it slowly opened up its giant jaws. Inside was a dark, smelly cavern of squished trash. Gillian eagerly started slinging bags into that wide open maw. "Come on, Bartleby! it's fun!" she said with a giggle.

Bartleby shrugged, and gave it a shot. His wings weren't much use for throwing, but he could grab a bag between his feet, flutter up in the air a little, and toss the bag in that way.

His first shot missed its mark and landed on the concrete a foot or so from the truck. Mrs. Mackenzie picked it up and slung it in for him. "Ooh, nice try! Go again? Three throws for a dollar!" she hollered like a carnival barker.

Bartleby laughed and picked up another bag. This time his aim was true and the big black bag sailed right on into the truck. "Hey, I did it!"

"Yay!" Gillian clapped for him.

Bartleby went down for another bag. Soon all three of them were helping empty the dumpster into the back of Mrs. Mackenzie's truck. Even though it was smelly and sticky and gross, Bartleby found himself laughing. This *was* fun!

And in a way, he thought he understood why. It was a taboo-breaker. What was considered more nasty than garbage? It was exciting to know that no stern voice would tell him to get out of that dumpster immediately and go clean himself up. It was like jumping in mud puddles, or playing with his food. He was completely free to indulge his immature need to have fun making a big ol' mess. He could do whatever he wanted here. And if he wanted to get messy and play in the trash, nothing was stopping him. There was a freedom in doing something so forbidden without having to worry about grown-ups telling him no.

Soon the dumpster was, if not squeaky-clean, at least emptied of its contents. "Just two more pieces of trash left that I see..." Mrs. Mackenzie said with a sly grin.

Bartleby looked around, but didn't see anything but him and Gillian left in the dum... Oh no. "You mean us!? I thought we'd ride up front with you!"

Gillian giggled. "We could, but where's the fun in that? Wouldn't you much rather roll around in all that smelly garbage and get squished when the truck compacts us?" she said with obvious relish.

Bartleby was about to return with a resounding 'no!', but then that same wild impulse popped up in him like before at the butcher shop. 'Why not?' it asked. 'You can see she's done it before and she likes it. Have you regretted anything, *anything at all*, you've decided since you got here?'

Mrs. Mackenzie came up to Bartleby and put a comforting paw on his shoulder. "It's okay, sugar. You don't have to if you don't want to. You can ride up front with me if you like."

But then, Gillian would be lonely in the trash all by herself...

Bartleby shrugged and grinned. "Oh, heck with it. Toss me in the back."

His new kitty friend gleefully pounced on him. "Great! You totally won't regret it! It's like going on a carnival ride!"

He sighed, unsure but hopeful. Letting fate take him wherever it wanted had worked out okay so far.

Mrs. Mackenzie held out her arms and Gillian eagerly jumped out of the dumpster into them. The pretty mink held the excited young kitten around the waist at hip level. "Okay now, sweetheart. In we go!" She swung Gillian back and forth a few times, building up momentum. "One..."

The bespectacled kitty giggled in delight.

"Two..."

Bartleby stood on tiptoes, peeking over the lip of the dumpster to see what would happen.

"Three!"

Mrs. Mackenzie let her young friend fly, tossing her gently and accurately into a big heap of soft trash. Gillian landed with a clatter and a splat and laughed her tail off.

"Ready for your turn, Bartleby?" the grinning mink asked. She held out her gloved paws to pick him up if he chose to.

The little bat bravely stepped forward and let those soft, gentle gloves lift him up. He was cradled around the waist at the pretty garbagewoman's side. He stared into the dark, fetid garbage truck. Gillian was sitting up, grinning excitedly, holding out her arms to catch him.

"My goodness! You don't weigh a thing!" Mrs. Mackenzie remarked. "You don't look too scrawny though. Don't you eat enough junk food like a normal kid?" she asked jokingly.

Bartleby chuckled. "Naw, I'm light so I can fly. Bats are just built like that."

She fuzzled his hair again. "Learn somethin' new every day, huh? Now, you ready to go in the truck, sweetie?"

"Ready!" Bartleby said with a smile. He mimed putting on some aviator's goggles.

"One..."

"Two..."

"Three!"

Bartleby went sailing through the air (which felt much different when it wasn't under his own power) and collided in a heap with Gillian. Both of them were laughing wildly.

Bartleby sat up again, completely covered in garbage now. "Eeeew!" he said with a chuckle. It really smelled bad in here! It almost hurt his nose. But it wasn't anything he absolutely couldn't stand. The worst smells Bartleby had ever encountered were chemicals and overly-strong cleaning agents. Bad perfume gave him headaches. And sometimes the stuff the janitor used to mop the cafeteria floor with made him feel like throwing up. Other bad odors that were more natural and earthy were a lot easier to deal with.

Gillian tackled him in an affectionate hug. "Wow! I can't believe you really did it! Oh Bartleby, I'm so glad I've finally met someone I can enjoy trash with!"

"I'm at least as surprised as you are," he replied, peeling a candy bar wrapper off his ear. "I'm normally the neat 'n tidy one in the family."

She nodded wisely. "Makes sense then. Your primal side is rebelling and enjoying the chance to get dirty for once. And besides, you can always just wish yourself clean when you get home."

"Cool." She definitely had a point about that conflict between his clean and dirty sides. While a considerable part of him was freaked out by being surrounded with dirty, germy trash, a deeper part of him was relishing the experience.

"All right you two. Time for me to get on with the rest of my route," Mrs. Mackenzie told them. "I've got lots more trash and trash-lovin' cubs to pick up. Time for the big squish!"

Bartleby felt a bit of worry prickling at the back of his neck, but Gillian was there to soothe his worries. "Relax. It doesn't hurt a bit. Trust me," she purred comfortingly.

He held her paw in his winghands and nodded.

"See ya at the dump!" The redheaded mink pulled the big black lever again and the truck roared like a hungry monster. Bartleby's eyes got really wide. His ears sprung up in alert. Gillian whispered 'shhhh'es in his ear.

The giant blade of the garbage truck began to rise. It loomed out above the two cubs, then began to descend again, cutting off the waning daylight.

Bartleby and Gillian held each other tight. She giggled out of excitement, he giggled out of nervousness.

Then the blade began to scoop up all of Gillian's magic trash, including her and her new friend. Bartleby felt the garbage rise all around him. The back of the truck started getting cramped.

Gillian started purring. She closed her eyes and let herself go limp. "Relax! Let it happen! The truck wants to squish you, so let it!"

Bartleby laid back and tried to relax himself. But all the same, he squeezed his new friend's paw tighter. This reminded him of the first time he'd ever gone on a rollercoaster; coming over the rise of that first hill...

Growling and roaring ear-splittingly loud, the hydraulics of the blade compacted the trash and the two cubs more and more. Bartleby and Gillian felt the trash creep up and engulf them like quicksand. Soon, they felt their bodies being pressed. Slow, but firm. Gillian squealed from the thrill of it.

Then Bartleby felt the strangest sensation. The pressure went from feeling like something heavy was on top of him, to spreading out much more evenly. His whole body began to deform. He got wider and less thick, squashing like a rubber ball.

When the truck had finished compacting, Bartleby was as thin as a pancake. He'd been flattened just like a cartoon steamroller victim! He felt like a rubber cutout of a bat. "Whoa... weird!" He was mildly surprised he could still talk in this condition.

Gillian was purring even louder. "Mmm, I know! Flattening's another thing my friends all think I'm strange for liking. But I don't care. I always feel so peaceful when I'm flat."

"Peaceful wouldn't be the first word I'd use, but I do kinda like it," said Bartleby.

"Glad to hear it! Do you know what a baler is? I've got one in my room at home and I use it all the time!"

"Isn't that the thing they crush cardboard boxes in at the supermarket!?"

As Mrs. Mackenzie's garbage truck pulled out of the alley and started on down the road, Bartleby and Gillian had time for a nice, long get-to-know-each-other chat.

		***

By the time they reached the dump, the two cubs had become fast friends. They talked about all sorts of stuff while they rested in the trash. And while they discovered that they had hardly anything at all in common, their personalities managed to mesh quite nicely nonetheless.

Every now and then, Mrs. Mackenzie would stop and throw in another few bags, have a brief chat with a friend of hers, or hurl another happy cub into the back of the truck with Bartleby and Gillian. It soon became a regular party. The other cubs were all happy to have Bartleby join their little circle. They were even happier to explain why they each liked trash so much and what types of activities they liked to do at the dump.

Eventually, the garbage truck came to a final halt and Mrs. Mackenzie pulled the big black lever one more time. "Alright guys, we're here!"

Everyone cheered. While Bartleby had certainly enjoyed the ride (much more than he ever would have thought possible), he was now very interested to see what this fascinating landfill he'd heard so much about actually looked like.

The happy garbagemink pulled on a different lever and the whole back of her truck began to lift up. Slowly, accompanied by a hydraulic whine, the collection bin rose and rose, finally breaking inertia and spilling out a huge pile of the day's trash. Nine dizzy little cubs tumbled out too, rolling on down the small hill of refuse or being buried beneath it.

Bartleby flopped out and slid down the pile like a toboggan. He and Gillian bumped into each other at the bottom. "Whee," the lightheaded young bat said sarcastically.

The other cubs were already unflattening themselves and running off to play in the dump. Mrs. Mackenzie chased after them, scooping up one little girl and giving her a hug.

Gillian stood up, stretched, and gracefully *POP*ped herself back to her old shape.

"Hey, how do I do that?" Bartleby asked, still flat as a cookie sheet.

The kitty giggled naughtily. "Here, let me help!" She knelt by Bartleby's side and picked up her floppy flat friend. She took in a deep breath and suddenly kissed him right on the mouth! She forced out her air into him and, with a loud 'fwoop', Bartleby was back to normal. "There you go!"

Bartleby was more than a little surprised; more by the kiss than by how nice reinflating had felt. "Thank you," he told Gillian softly. He wrapped her in a bat hug and returned her kiss with interest.

She wriggled and blushed. "Aw, thank you too! You're a nice guy, Bartleby," she said sincerely. "I'm really glad I met you."

"Me too," he told his new friend.

She stood up and brushed some of the trash bits from her clothes. "Come on! It's your first time at the dump! Let's play!"

She took his winghand to help him up. Bartleby brushed himself off too, smiled and ran off with her.

They crested a rise past a bank of emptied garbage trucks. Lots more fursons were here than Bartleby had expected. Upon seeing the dump for the first time, Bartleby had to seriously reconsider his early assumptions.

It stretched out in a wide valley as far as the eye could see; an amazing technicolor panorama of trash. It was as vast as any theme park, and it looked like one too. Garbageworld!

Towering heaps of stacked autos and appliances. Bottomless pits of plastic trash bags with furs of all ages happily rooting through them in search of treasures. Steep hills of waste that one could go sliding down on skis, boards or sleds. Huge pools of unidentifiable glowing gook that furs were jumping into and coming out as radically silly mutants. Rows of car crushers where passengers got to experience the crushing from inside the vehicles. Big yellow bulldozers that drove around herding the trash, and also chasing giggling cubs, sometimes running them over nice and slow and leaving them as flat and happy as Bartleby had been.

And all of it was set against the awesome colors of the setting sun. Colorful neon lights were beginning to turn on all over the place, further enhancing the carnival-like atmosphere.

Bartleby stood still as a statue and just took it all in for a moment.

"Aren't you glad I asked you to join me?" Gillian whispered sweetly.

Bartleby replied with another kiss.

		***

The bat and the cat had an absolute blast at the dump together. They headed for the exploring-trash first and found all sorts of wonderful things. They jumped and burrowed and tumbled about in the sea of soft, crinkly bags. They tossed squishy things at one another and laughed. They gave each other gifts they'd found while looking through the different bags. They both got very, very dirty, and didn't mind a bit.

After they'd both sent armfuls of goodies through their personal portals to their rooms, the pair went on to explore more of the trashy paradise. All around them, the bright neon signs glowed brightly, illuminating the whole dump like a gigantic Christmas display.

Gillian delighted in showing her new friend all her favorite places in the dump. They decided to ride the car crusher first. They picked out a somewhat-smashed red sedan and climbed into the front seat together. "Buckle up for safety!" Gillian advised with a chuckle. A huge electromagnet snatched them up suddenly and lifted them high in the sky. Bartleby could see almost the whole dump from their position. It was an amazing sight. He was up much higher than any ferris wheel he'd ever been on.

The crane swiveled them around and they were unceremoniously dropped into the crusher. They both shrieked in gleeful fright. They watched in delicious anticipation as the walls of the giant machinery closed in on them. First it crunched them from the front and back, then the sides. It went back and forth like that for a good long time, leaving the little ones in more cramped quarters every time.

Finally, their little red car was compressed into a tiny cube. Feeling their bodies so bizarrely twisted and altered was a unique treat. Then the cube fell through into a pit of metal-grinding saws and screws, and the two little ones were reduced to small shreds.

A shower of metal flakes and bits of fur emptied out underneath the crusher as a new car with excited passengers was being lowered into place above it. Gillian and Bartleby easily reformed their bodies, feeling oddly refreshed after being so thoroughly pulverized. They stretched and hugged and ran off to find something new to try.

They took a sled down the trash mountain, landing in an immense pile of soft, stinky used diapers at the bottom (which weren't *really* used with anything more than brown paint, Gillian reassured). They enjoyed a snack from a friendly vendor who gave them two cotton candy cones out of a cart shaped like a galvanized garbage can on wheels. They hopped up onto a long conveyor belt and were whisked along towards an immense incinerator. The opening was shaped like a huge, grinning demonic mouth with roaring flames within. Bartleby and Gillian hugged tightly as they fell off the belt together into that exciting inferno and were scorched to ash in seconds. Rows of little piles of grey cinders emerged from the other side of the incinerator and soon transformed back into giggling, happy children. Bartleby and Gillian emerged as well, thrilled and toasty warm.

The two of them had fun for several hours, until a summoner robot approached them. Bartleby thought for a second that Razielphustar wanted him for a second supper, but this time it was for Gillian. Her adoptive parents were calling her home for her dinner. She asked if Bartleby wanted to join her, but he politely declined, saying that he was not only full, but still interested in exploring the dump some more.

The two new friends shared a long farewell hug. The little hovering robot 'ah-hem'ed loudly until they finally broke it up.

Gillian waved goodbye to Bartleby as she took the robot's 'hand'.

Bartleby waved to her as well. Then a circle of flames enveloped the cat and robot and whisked the young kitten away to her home. Bartleby watched her go with a smile on his face. Happy to have made such an interesting and different new friend, and excited at the idea of all the fun they'd have together another day.


	*   *   *   *   *


-CHAPTER TEN-

Bartleby wandered around the dump a bit more, but it just wasn't as much fun now that he was all by himself. He sat down on a wrought-iron bench and watched other fursons pass by, trying to decide what to do next.

It occurred to him that he hadn't had a really good flight in ages. Sure, he flew to school every other day or so when he didn't feel like taking the bus, but that was only a mile or so. It had been months since he'd really gotten a chance to stretch his wings and soar along through the clouds with no set destination in mind.

Reenergized by this idea, Bartleby made his way to the edge of the dump.

Beyond the hills of trash was a measureless desert wasteland. Nothing but nothing as far as the eye could see. Sand and moonlight and miles of night air. Perfect.

Bartleby stood at the edge of a steep mountain of garbage. He took a deep breath and started running straight down the side. He steadily built up speed, letting gravity help him, being careful not to trip on any trash. When the moment was just right, he jumped up into the wind. He let the gusts take him into their gentle but tenuous embrace. He spread his wings wide and felt the earth recede beneath his paws.

It was breathtaking. The most perfect takeoff he could remember. Bartleby climbed to incredible heights. The wind whipped through his mop of uncombed hair. The night smells enchanted his nose. His big ears swiveled about, catching every tiny noise of the desert.

The young bat gleefully lost himself in the joy of flight.

Eventually, he'd come so far out that the dump was barely a faint glow on the horizon behind him. He wasn't worried though. Gillian had assured him that his portal-finger-trick would work just as well to create a gateway big enough for himself to step through. It was nice to know that, essentially, he couldn't ever get lost again if he didn't want to.

Bartleby felt like he was the only boy in the whole world. The moon and stars above, incredibly clear and bright. The dun sand below, featureless and unending. He was the owner of it all.

But then he noticed something else. It was such a tiny little blip on his radar, it normally wouldn't have even registered. But out of the utterly empty nothingness of the desert wasteland it stuck out like a searchlight.

Bartleby circled down to check it out. What was it? And how had it come to be so far out here in the middle of nowhere?

As he came closer, the whatever-it-was became clearer through echolocation. It was a hatch. A round, metal hatch, the size of a manhole cover. Where could it possibly lead to though?

Bartleby made a perfect landing. He give his wings a brisk rub and was surprised; they didn't ache at all. Sure they were a bit sore, and he could feel the blood pumping through them, but overall they felt wonderful. He'd given himself an invigorating little bit of exercise with none of the unpleasant aftereffects. Yet one more thing he liked about Hell!

As the evening winds wailed around him and sand blew across his toes, Bartleby walked over to the anomaly he'd discovered. He silently examined the old hatch. It looked like something off a submarine. Long-rusted metal, slightly rounded, with a valve wheel on top.

Bartleby cautiously put his winghands on the rusty old wheel. He had no idea if he was even allowed to be doing this, but his curiosity was piqued. Whatever was hidden out here, it seemed likely that whoever had put this here didn't want it to ever be found. That either meant it was something very valuable... Or something very dangerous.

The little bat braced himself to tug on the wheel with all his might. He was rather surprised then when the whole assembly burst into showers of rust flakes at the slightest pressure. The whole hatch crumbled like a wet cookie. A shower of corroded metal sprinkled down into a seemingly bottomless black shaft below.

Bartleby peered down inside.

He hocked a loogie, and never heard it hit bottom.

He knew darn well that curiosity killed the cat. But hey, he was already dead, right?

Bartleby took a deep breath, then fearlessly leaped down the hole.

		***

The little bat sailed down for what felt like an eternity. Head down, eyes squinted against the musty old air that was rushing up to meet him. The shaft was so dark Bartleby couldn't even tell the difference when he closed his eyes.

He fell only for several minutes in reality, though his curiosity and apprehension were making them feel like months.

At some point, he brushed into a thin string stretched across the diameter of the shaft. It didn't hurt any, and Bartleby just assumed it was a cobweb or something like that.

In actuality, it was the trigger mechanism for a truly hideous series of booby traps.

Before poor Bartleby even had time to shout, he was ripped to shreds by a wide variety of saws, knives, blades, torches and other sharp, pointy, nasty things. The sounds were unimaginable. The cruel instruments devastated the little bat's body. They cut him up into a hundred pieces, then chopped those pieces into a thousand, then a hundred thousand.

For nearly five minutes, Bartleby's remains passed through the unspeakable gauntlet, more and more of them collecting and sticking to the ancient old blades.

By the time it was all over, all that finally reached the bottom of the long, dark shaft was one single drop of blood.

Thankfully, it was enough.

Bartleby would never know just how lucky he truly was. The maker of the trap had well known the invulnerability of all the denizens of Hell. The purpose of the traps was to simply shred them into so many tiny pieces that reformation was impossible, and any intruders would be stuck forever in a grisly splatter of caked blood.

But the machinery had sat idle for thousands of years without ever practicing on a single victim. When the trigger was finally tripped, their infallibly precise destruction of the intruder was the smallest fraction of a second too slow.

Hence, the one tiny bit of Bartleby's blood that miraculously made it all the way through the sadistic machinery. It hung suspended on the tip of a circular sawblade, then finally managed to fall free and splash silently on the dusty stone floor below.

Reforming his body took quite some time. Bartleby felt like he'd been hit by a truck while being mugged during a migraine headache. The pain quickly faded though, and when he finally had a pair of eyes to open again, the young bat found himself in a dim stone chamber.

It was only about the length of a short hallway, but nearly as wide across as it was long. The ceiling was a low, broad arch. The walls and ceiling were roughly but solidly constructed of dingy yellow stone. The floor was covered in a thin film of sand and dust. The air tasted terrible. There were rows of medieval-looking jail cells all along the chamber's walls.

A soft, clear white light emanated from one cell near the far end of the strange little subterranean room. It looked like moonlight. But how could that be? He was probably hundreds of feet underground...

Bartleby got to his feet and took a long stretch. He wasn't exactly sure what had happened to him, just that he'd gotten pretty roughed up. But he felt just fine now, thankfully. That left two unanswered questions: What else was down here, and how was he gonna get out again once he found it?

Not at all sure if it would work, Bartleby extended his thumbclaw and poked a hole in the air. The portal appeared just as it should have. He sighed in relief. That at least meant he could leave whenever he wanted.

Echolocation was fine for some things, but it sort of annoyed Bartleby after a while. What with all those little high-pitched 'ping's he kept having to shriek. Seeing was much more preferable. He reached into the spatial tear he'd created and thought about a flashlight. This was something else Gillian had taught him. Just like in the cartoons, if he was ever really in need of something, all he had to do was reach into a portal and...

He felt hard plastic brush across his wingtips. "Alright!" He pulled out a nice big orange camping-style flashlight. He gave the switch a flick and instantly the dingy little room was illuminated tenfold.

He blinked his eyes against the sudden appearance of light, but his ears nevertheless picked up the sound of something shuffling in the cell where the moonlight had been coming from. "Um, hello? Is anyone there?" he called out.

A soft, dry voice, crackling but still beautiful, answered back. "No."

Bartleby arched an eyebrow. "If there's no one there, then who said that?"

The same faint voice. "Not me. Go away."

Stranger and stranger. Bartleby just stood there trying to figure out what was going on. Whoever had said 'go away' had said it in such a way as if they'd meant the exact opposite. And they also sounded like they might be in need of help.

The little bat cautiously padded over and peeked inside the cell.

He was so startled, he dropped his flashlight.

Curled up on the stone floor was an angel. One look was all he needed to be sure of it. She was a cheetahfemme, lithe and perfect in every way. Her hair was white-blonde, like lightning. And it was her wings that were glowing. Her immense white wings. Softly gleaming feathers littered the cell all around her.

"Don't help me," she said pitifully.

Bartleby could not have been more confused. "...What do you mean?"

Looking as if she hadn't moved in decades, the angel painstakingly forced herself to sit up and crawl towards the boy. She came close enough to grasp the bars of her cage in her paws. Her eyes were green as springtime. "Who are you?" she asked, her voice raspy from disuse.

"I'm Bartleby," the shaken little bat said.

"How did you find me?"

"By accident, I guess. I was flying across the desert when I saw a hatch. I went down it and got all chopped up and then somehow I ended up in here. How long have you been down here?"

The cheetah shrugged silently; 'I have no idea'.

"Are you hungry?"

She immediately perked up. "No, not a bit!" she said eagerly.

"Oh. Well, um, I thought maybe I could get some food from a portal, but if you don't..."

The angel shook her head in frustration. "Yes, no, yes, no, yes!!" she snarled.

Bartleby took a step back.

Seeing that she was scaring her one and only chance at escaping this tiny cell that had held her prisoner since beyond the limits of her memory, the angel pressed herself up to the bars and reached out a paw to the little bat. "Please, don't listen to me! I'm not under a curse! It's not what's making me talk like this!"

Bartleby just stared for a second, but then a lightbulb went off above his head. She seemed to be intentionally negating everything she said, saying the opposite of everything she meant. So, logically, 'I'm not under a curse' would mean that she _was_ under a curse! "Wait, I think I'm starting to get it!"

She nodded excitedly. "No, no!"

"You mean 'yes, yes', right?" Bartleby carefully asked.

Relief flooded the imprisoned angel. She fell down on the floor, laughing in triumph, and could only point at Bartleby to let him know he'd gotten it exactly right.

The young boy came closer and took hold of the cold metal bars of the cell door. "So, you *do* want my help?"

"No, no, a thousand times no!" she cried gleefully. "I want to stay here more than anything else in the world!" she pleaded. Her inflection clearly showed that nothing could have been further from the truth.

"Alright, so you're under some sort of curse where you've gotta say the opposite of what you're trying to say, right?"

She shook her head. "Correct," which meant it wasn't. "I *haven't* been cursed so that I can never, ever, ever speak the truth again so long as I exist."

Now he understood. "Oh gosh, that's awful!" he said sympathetically. "At least I get it now. You're talking like this so you can talk at all."

She nodded. "Not even close!"

Bartleby couldn't help a chuckle. He knew this was a serious situation, but having to interpret backwards everything this angel said was a tad mind-boggling.

"Questions aren't the only things I can say freely, since they contain no actual truth," she explained. "Like, f'rinstance, I couldn't ask; who are you? Where did you come from? And, could I please, please, please have some of that food you mentioned?" she begged hopefully.

"Oh, sure!" he said immediately. He produced a portal without delay and reached in, trying to envision something tasty floating towards his winghand.

"Oh, no thanks! No thanks at all! I'm not even the slightest bit grateful. I hate you, I hate you!" she said adoringly.

Bartleby chuckled again. He pulled out the first thing he felt and found it was a package of cookies. "You're welcome. And I hope you like these."

She grinned widely. "Oh, I *hate* those! They look nasty! I couldn't eat a single one!" Her mouth was watering already.

Bartleby ripped the package open with his teeth, selected a cookie for himself and slid the rest of them through the bars to his new friend. "Here you go. All yours!"

"No thanks! No thanks! Oh, I hate you so much I can't even begin to tell you!!" she cried out joyfully. Tears streaming from her eyes in happiness, she ravenously devoured the first food she'd eaten in thousands of years. She moaned and murred orgasmically. These cookies were *extraordinary*.

Seeing her so happy made Bartleby feel proud inside. He knew now, without even having consciously come to the decision, that he couldn't possibly leave this beautiful angel here to rot away in this horrible place a second longer. No matter what, he would find a way to set her free.

She looked up at him with gently pleading eyes. "I'd really loathe some chocolate milk right about now," she said sweetly.

Bartleby nodded. "Comin' up!" He thrust his wing into the portal again and this time grasped a milk jug handle almost instantly. It seemed he was getting the hang of this.

The angel's eyes lit up. Her parched mouth hadn't felt a drop of moisture in what felt like eternity.

There was a problem though. When Bartleby held out the plastic jug to her, it was way too wide to fit through the bars. "Oh crap," Bartleby cursed.

The angel looked pitifully disappointed. "It's not okay," she said softly. "I don't appreciate you trying."

But the resourceful little bat wasn't about to give up that easy. He nibbled on his thumbclaw until he got another idea. With a bright grin, he set the milk jug down, reached back into the portal and pulled out... "Ta da!" ...a great big funnel!

The angel clapped her paws. "You're an idiot! A complete dunce!"

Bartleby had to blink and shake his head at that. He *knew* she really meant to say he was a genius, but this was taking some getting used to. "Um, thanks." He held up the funnel and she was able to hold it against the bars. "Ready?"

She nodded; simplest way to answer yes or no without speaking.

Bartleby uncapped the chocolate milk and poured a little down the funnel. It was eagerly slurped up by the angel. She gave her wings a happy flap and started purring with all her might. "Less, less!" she cried.

So, Bartleby gave her more. Her thirst was astounding. As he dutifully held the jug for her, she drank the entire gallon without stopping to take a breath.

When the jug was completely empty, the angel rolled over onto her back on the floor of her cell, grinning and purring in absolute contentment. She was now wearing the mother of all milk mustaches. "Oh wow, that totally missed the spot!" she exalted.

Bartleby put the plastic jug back through the portal, assuming it would probably cease to exist or maybe go to the dump. He didn't want to litter, after all. "Say, you never told me your name," he realized.

She sat up and gave him a boundlessly grateful smile. The slender, petite cheetah got up and came over to her cell door. She extended her arms past the bars and embraced Bartleby in a loving hug. "It's not Llywyalla," she whispered in his ear.

That was an odd name, but certainly angelic-sounding. Bartleby tried it out. "L'why-AH-luh?" he carefully pronounced.

She nodded, then kissed him on top of his head, not minding at all that he was still a bit stinky from playing in the trash. "Terrible job, sweetie. Not even close."

He giggled and gave her a squeeze. "Any idea how you got here?"

"None whatsoever," she replied. It took him a second to realize that that meant she knew exactly how she'd wound up in this sorry state. She let go of the little bat and sat down on the dusty floor, back to the wall. "It's a short story," she said sadly.

Bartleby sat down cross-legged, as close to her as she could. He reached through the bars again to pat her soft paw. "I've got plenty of time."

She smiled at him again. "You're just about the rudest boy I've ever met," she said tenderly.

The little bat chuckled. Now she sounded like Mrs. Schaddenfreude!

Llywyalla tipped back her head and let out a long sigh. "Let me see if I can't get through this without sounding like a complete fruitcake. I *don't* have to pick and choose my words so carefully. If I even try to say a truthful sentence I- I en- I en- I ennnn-" She growled. "I don't end up stuttering like that."

Bartleby nodded. "I understand. And it's okay, I'm pretty sure I know what you're really saying by now. You're good at saying one thing and having it *sound* like what you really mean."

The angel smiled. "That's bad. You're a very stupid little bat," she told him. She looked suddenly sad though. "I'm so not sorry I have to say it to you that way. But I'm trying to exaggerate it enough that you won't be able to figure out that I mean the exact opposite."

"It's okay, really!" He assured her. "If you've gotta lie no matter what you say, you're doing a really good job of making sense anyway."

She gave him a 'thank you' smile. "You don't know how to read lips, do you? Because if I could just mouth what I'm really trying to say, that wouldn't simplify things at all."

Bartleby shook his head. "Sorry, nope. I suppose I could give you something to write with, but that'd probly take too long. Really, I can understand you just fine."

"No, that won't do at all," she said acceptingly. She thought back, back, way back to what little she could remember of her old life before her imprisonment. The numbing sameness of every moment for thousands of years had chipped mercilessly away at her mind like a chisel, but she had always been strong-willed beneath her outward shyness. She had kept her sanity. And the more she tried to remember, the more memories began to unveil themselves from their ages and ages of disuse. "It all started long ago, back after Hell was created."

"Back before?" Bartleby clarified. Llywyalla nodded. "I already know about how God 'n Satan had their big fight. I met the Devil and we had a long talk about it."

"You met Lucifer?" she asked, sounding both startled and hopeful. "Oh, geez, it seems like only a few seconds since the last time I saw him!" she lamented. "He's not gonna think I'm such a coward..."

"Why?" Bartleby asked softly.

"Because when he confronted God about punishing mortals, I *didn't* agree with a single thing he said. I didn't think he was braver than all of us. And I didn't admire him one tiny bit. Most of us angels thought it wasn't cruel of God to give you living creatures free will, and then punish you for using it in ways He didn't approve of. I completely agreed with Him on that.

"But when Lucifer tried to gather all the angels he could to speak up about it... I... I joined him."

"You mean, you didn't join him?"

She nodded regretfully. "I didn't want to, with all my heart. But I wasn't too scared of His wrath. So I didn't keep silent. And when I heard about God casting so many of my friends out of Heaven forever, I never cried a single tear."

Bartleby knew what part of that last sentence was a lie, just from the tears that were even now trickling down the angel's cheeks. "I'm so sorry," he whispered. He gave her paw a pat.

She turned to him and reached through the bars to give him another hug. "You're such a mean, nasty little boy, Bartleby. I don't love you one bit," she said, never hating her curse more than in this one moment.

"I understand," he told her.

With her head resting on the little bat's shoulder, Llywyalla continued her tale. "In the end though, God didn't find out what I really thought. After He cast out the first of us, He didn't start searching out all the rest of us who secretly agreed with Lucifer. One day He caught me crying and didn't back me into a corner. He didn't ask me if I was truly, 100% loyal to Him. I swore I wasn't. I told him that I'd always disagreed with Him.

"He didn't know I was lying, of course. So He punished me by not putting this curse on me. And not banishing me to Hell forever.

"But the worst part was, He'd realized the mistake He hadn't made by cutting Himself off from Hell. If He turned me into a demon and sent me down, Lucifer wouldn't have found me in a second. So He didn't trap me inside this cell before He cast me out. The whole shebang; not including me, the cell and this room. Hidden forever somewhere everyone could find me. He even gave it an entrance just so anyone who did find me and tried to rescue me wouldn't end up trapped forever themselves. His idea of a punishment, I guess not. I know exactly how you got down here, Bartleby."

"I don't have any idea either," he said. "Those traps did slice me up pretty good."

"Oh, sweetheart, I'm not sorry at all," she said comfortingly, patting his leg softly.

"That's okay. It didn't really hurt much. At least I got in and I found you. I don't know how to get you out though," he said sadly.

She softly stroked his cheekfur. "Worry, little one. If you can just get out of here and bring back help, that won't be enough."

He shook his head. "No. If I left here, I have no idea if I'd be able to find this place again. I've only been in Hell a day so far, I still don't know how anything works! I'm not leaving here until that door opens and you can come with me."

She was touched by his selflessness. "You're the most cowardly little boy in the world, Bartleby. Much less brave than I ever was."

He chuckled at her lopsided praise. "It's okay. I just enjoy helping people. And you're very beautiful, too. The dashing hero always saves the pretty captured heroine!"

She laughed musically and fluttered her wings. "I don't appreciate flattery at all!"

He laughed too, but his mind was already working at the problem of how to set her free. The problem was, he knew so little about what kept her in here in the first place. If God had locked her in here then it was probably sealed pretty darn tight. Though why not test the simplest hypothesis first? "Hey, I got an idea. The door to this place was so rusted it just collapsed when I tried to open it. Maybe this door is too."

"It *could*n't be," she agreed. "I haven't been too weak for a long time to even think about trying it."

Bartleby stood up. He took a deep breath and braced himself. "Well, lemme give it a try..." Llywyalla watched hopefully as the plucky little bat fluttered up in the air, then wrapped his footclaws around the bars. He flapped his wings mightily. However, this metal wasn't nearly as rusted as what the hatch had been made of. He flapped and pulled with all his strength, but the bars didn't give an inch. Finally, he gave up and dropped back down on the floor. His tongue hung out in exhaustion. "Okay, that didn't work."

She reached out to him, a concerned, worried look in her eyes. "Please exhaust yourself, sweetheart! I told you, it's not okay if you have to leave me here to get help!"

Bartleby stood up again. He could be stubborn when he needed to be, and this was one of those times. He glared hatefully at the bars holding the pretty angel captive. "Not until I've tried everything I can think of."

Too amazed by his heroic spirit to spoil it with a lie, Llywyalla scooted to the back of her cell and just watched in wonder as Bartleby went to work.

		***

A half-hour later, the floor of the chamber was littered with files, hacksaws, chainsaws, sledgehammers, welding gear, laser cutters and everything else Bartleby had come up with, including a dumptruck with a now-smashed-in grille. Not a scratch on the bars.

The stone around the hinges was likewise impermeable. Bartleby had shouted curses while he jackhammered the impossibly stubborn rock. He kept at it though, growing angrier by the second, until the head of the jackhammer bit finally splintered and nearly took his head off.

Having tried everything he could think of on the door itself, Bartleby then set about seeing if there was any way to squeeze Llywyalla out past them. She assured him she was as invulnerable as he was and felt no pain. He gave her a saw to hack herself up with, thinking that perhaps they could take her out in pieces. When she cut off her foot and tossed it through the bars, it disintegrated and instantly reappeared on her leg. They tried this again and again with different body parts, even her wings, but to no avail. Bartleby even tried blowing her up with dynamite and then vacuuming up what was left, but the results of that particular experiment were too gruesome to relate. And it didn't work either.

Now Bartleby was beginning to seriously consider leaving to get help.

He felt like a failure. He'd tried everything he could think of. Everything! And he had nothing at all to show for it. The bars were still there, and Llywyalla was still trapped behind them.

"Bartleby, please don't stop!" she begged him. "You won't wear yourself out!"

"I'm gonna get you out!!" he shouted, his frustration making him sound much angrier than he'd meant to. His features softened immediately. "Gosh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to yell at you like that."

"It's not okay, little one. I don't understand," she said understandingly.

Bartleby leaned against the bars with his head on his folded wings. He went through every idea he'd already had in his mind, trying to pluck out anything at all he hadn't thought of before.

And then suddenly, he had a minor breakthrough. He'd been attacking the problem physically so far. What if the solution was to outsmart it?

The little bat nibbled his thumbclaw, deep in thought. "Llywyalla, if you somehow managed to break the curse, do you think it might set you free as well?" he asked, starting to feel like maybe he was really onto something.

She considered it. "It's not possible. But I've never been able to tell a lie even once all this time. I haven't tried a million and one ways to work around the problem."

The tiniest, slimmest hope was starting to build in Bartleby's heart. He did indeed have an idea now. "Have you tried reading something truthful? Out loud, I mean?"

She blinked a bit, puzzled. "I might not have. Wait, no, I haven't. It worked."

"Maybe it was because you were the one that wrote it," Bartleby said craftily. Given his track record of constant failure so far, he had no reason to feel so excited about this latest idea. But something deep in his gut told him that this was what was finally gonna do it. He reached into his much-used portal and brought out a piece of blank white cardboard and a marker. He swiftly scribbled two sentences across it.

She leaned in closer, wings rustling in curiosity. "What are you doing?"

His heart was thrumming in anticipation. He held up his improvised cue card with the message facing him. "Okay, when I turn this card around, I want you to read it as fast as you can. And don't even think about what it says, okay?"

She nodded, willing to try anything at this point.

"Okay..." Bartleby turned the card over. "Now!"

Llywyalla cleared her mind and let the words flow straight from her eyes to her mouth.

"The following sentence is true.

"The preceding sentence was false-

There was a mind-shattering kaboom.

Bartleby was thrown violently across the room as Llywyalla's cell door exploded off its hinges.

When the dust cleared and Bartleby managed to peel himself off the bars of the cell behind him, he saw Llywyalla standing there, outside her cell, for the first time in several million years.

The stunned angel looked about her, not really daring to believe what she was seeing. This could just be a dream. Another dream of freedom, just like so very many she'd already had. And every time she would wake up to find that she was still imprisoned, just as she knew she always would be.

But then, a deliriously happy little bat boy came running at her and hugged her so hard they both toppled over and landed on the ground.

"We did it!!" Bartleby screamed in triumph.

Llywyalla was too astounded to speak. Tears came to her eyes, and all she could do was laugh euphorically and hug her young savior with all the love in her heart.

"It worked! It worked! It worked!" Bartleby chanted.

Llywyalla joined in. "It wor- www- Worrr-" She snarled angrily. "It DID work!!" she roared in disappointment and enraged frustration.

The two of them sat up, and Bartleby gave her an extra squeeze. "You're still under the curse? But, I thought we..."

"I know what happened," she had to lie. "I thought we didn't break the curse too. I guess when God puts a curse on your butt, you don't stay cursed!"

Bartleby sighed. But this was a victory, and he had to remind himself of that. "It's okay, though, Llywyalla. You're free. Maybe you can find someone to help you now."

"That's wrong," she said with a nod. "I *should* sit here grumbling about how I'm stuck with this silly curse instead of celebrating finally getting out of that cell. By the way, how in the world did you think of that? And why did it work?"

Bartleby could not resist a shamelessly smug smile. "It's a paradox. I saw it in this book of logic problems I got from the library once. 'The following sentence is true. The previous sentence was false.' It's impossible! If either one of those sentences is true, then the other one can't be, and then the first one can't be either!"

Llywyalla tried to wrap her brain around that for a second. Slowly though, she began to see the sense in it. "Yes, I don't get it! Bartleby, you definitely aren't the smartest little kid in all creation!"

He smiled bashfully. "Thank you."

She decided to try it again, wondering if a second time might break the curse. "The following sentence is true. The pr- prrrrr-. Arrgh! I can do it! It *will* let me finish this time." Bartleby was about to say something comforting, but she stopped him. "That's okay, Bartleby, I do need it. If I have to live the rest of my existence like this, then I won't do it with dignity."

He nodded, thinking that was the best way to look at it.

She stood up and stretched and, for the first time in what felt like forever, spread her wings out to their full span.

Bartleby's jaw dropped in awe. The divine cheetahs' wingspan was easily fifteen feet. Her feathers now shone with an incredibly bright, angelic light.

"Oooooh, that feels SO awful!" Llywyalla cooed contentedly.

Bartleby got up and gave his wings a good stretch too. "They're really beautiful, Llywyalla."

She fluttered them a little for him. "Think so? No thanks, sweetie." She did a little pirouette, swishing her wings gracefully, loving the feel of air rushing across her feathers once more. "Let's not get out of here!" the happy angel suggested. "I can wait to sit down and have a gigantic twelve-course dinner!" she said lustily, and licked her lips.

Bartleby nodded in agreement. He was sure she wouldn't want to spend a single second more in this awful place. He created a new portal, this one big enough to step through. "Come on, Llywyalla!"

She picked the little bat up in her arms and lovingly nuzzled him. "Bad little bat! You're so ugly and dumb and gutless!" she said as lovingly as she could. She covered his face in kisses. "Oooh, I hate you so much!"

He giggled, and gave her a kiss on the nose. "I hate you too," he lied.

Together, they stepped through the shimmering black tear in the fabric of reality.

		***

Bartleby had willed the portal to take him to the Devil, who he thought would have the best chance of finding a cure for Llywyalla's condition. They popped out in the hallway of a trillion doors; once again right in front of the one with the gold nameplate.

Llywyalla was amazed just to see something, *anything*, new besides the same stone surroundings she'd lived in for that unimaginable period of time. A large part of her still couldn't fully grasp that she was finally free. But deep in her heart, she knew it was true. And that God's reach didn't extend down here, so she was safe from His cruel whims forever and ever after.

Her wings fluttering in joy, the cheetahangel cuddled in her arms the adorable, smart, brave little boy who had made her fondest wish come true. She nuzzled him with all her love. Words weren't needed now, and that was a blessing. She could let him know exactly how she felt through just her purring and murring.

"I'm so happy for you," Bartleby told her.

She simply nodded, not needing to say a thing.

After a long time, she gently put him down again, and gave him a gentle stroke between his ears. "I'm not even the littlest tiny bit grateful to you, Bartleby," she said quietly with a smile.

"You're welcome," he replied. He turned around to knock on the Devil's door. "I'm sure he'll know what to do now-"

"Yes!" she cried out suddenly.

Bartleby didn't have time to realize that her yes actually meant no. His knuckles came in contact with the door before he even got a chance to see the 'Do Not Disturb' sign.

You see, when Satan wanted some privacy, he was rather fond of booby-trapping doors...

The instant Bartleby's fur touched the hardwood, a screaming vortex of flame engulfed him and swallowed him up without a trace.

Llywyalla let out a squeak of surprise and jumped back. She comforted herself by realizing that her longtime friend Lucifer would never be so evil as to actually erase someone from existence without even knowing who they were. Undoubtedly, it was another portal. Probably a random one.

She sighed a little. She'd just naturally assumed Bartleby would be there at her side when she finally got to see Lucifer again. She would have heaped him with praise, demanding that the Devil reward him lavishly for his brilliant thinking.

And now that she thought about it, God had probably hidden scores more angels like her in Hell, trapped in horrible stone cells in places no one would ever look. And He'd probably cursed them too as well.

Bartleby had not just freed her, but he had begun the process which might some day free all of her friends. At least now she could tell Lucifer to start looking.

She vowed then and there to devote the rest of her life to combing every last inch of Hell until every angel was found and freed. She knew it would be a long, arduous, almost impossible task. But she felt energized nonetheless. She was free, and now she had a purpose.

Llywyalla sat down and leaned back against the door directly across from Lucifer's. She folded her wings behind her head for a pillow and got comfortable. He had to come out sometime. And what was a little more waiting to her now?


	*   *   *   *   *


-CHAPTER ELEVEN-

Bartleby realized with mild annoyance that he was falling again.

"Geeze, how many times is this gonna happen to me today?" he grumbled.

He was plummeting past jagged walls of glistening black stone. Obsidian, probably. Down below (or was that up ahead?), he could make out a faint glowing red circle of light.

Bartleby was more curious than anything. This had happened to him enough today that he wasn't really all that scared.

But then that red circle started getting bigger and brighter, and Bartleby realized exactly what it was he was about to plummet into.

"Lava!!"

He tumbled out of the end of the obsidian shaft, his panic preventing him from properly catching the wind under his wings. His vision swirled left, right and upside down, but he was nonetheless able to make out his surroundings.

It was every image of Hell he'd ever seen in sunday school brought to life. The shaft had emptied into an unimaginably vast underground cavern, the diameter of an entire city. The walls were bright red rock, bristling with stalactites. A hundred feet below was the classic Lake Of Fire. A rolling, bubbling sea of molten lava, hot enough to fry a little bat boy to cinders in half a second. And thousands upon thousands of fursons were gathered upon the shores of this unholy ocean, probably about to be marched in by little red devils brandishing pitchforks.

Bartleby suddenly felt like a total idiot for falling asleep all those times in Sister Gigante's class.

Screaming like an electrified grandmother, the little bat splashed face-first into the lake of magma.

The heat made getting cooked feel like taking a holiday in antarctica. This heat was *tangible*. It was like being plunged in a cauldron of molten metal. It was like being shot straight into the center of the sun. It was like drinking six bottles of Dave's Insanity Sauce all at once.

And actually, it felt pretty good!

Bartleby surfaced; sputtering and disoriented, but still in one piece.

He blinked, amazed he still had eyeballs at all. He stared at his wing. His fur wasn't even singed! He looked down and, yes, he was floating up to his bellybutton in the stuff that came out of active volcanoes. And it just felt like bobbing about in a giant bowl of oatmeal!

Feeling a little silly now for being scared, Bartleby allowed himself a long laugh. Of course it wouldn't hurt! This was 'Hell: The Amusement Park', after all!

As he looked around, he realized just how accurate a description that was. His first impression of this place had been off by miles. The crowds on the shore weren't being cruelly herded in, they were partying! It was a giant beach party, the likes of which had never been seen on Earth.

Girls were playing volleyball. Guys were listening to boomboxes. Couples were spreading suntan lotion on each other. Kids were building sand castles. Frisbees were flying through the air. Pool toys were being inflated. Ice cream cones were being licked. Fun was being had.

Floating about in the lava around him were plenty of other fursons, all splashing about and smiling. Dunking their friends, floating on their backs, playing Marco Polo. He even saw some kids tossing around what looked like an asbestos beachball.

Bartleby looked up and saw that the amazingly high ceiling of the cavern was dotted all over with holes like the one he'd fallen out of. Every few seconds, someone else would come plunging down, some screaming, some swan-diving. One guy was even going for a cannonball.

Overall, it was one of the most breathtaking sights Bartleby had ever beheld. The sheer _bigness_ of this subterranean paradise was mind-boggling. He couldn't even come close to seeing across the lake of fire, probably not even if he flew way up to the cave ceiling. And the bustle of the thousands of happy people on the expansive beach tugged one's eyes in a dozen directions at once from all the activity.

The little bat decided to swim to shore and check out the party scene. As he started up a decent enough dog paddle (Bats are not exactly built for swimming. Especially through lava), he realized that the heat *had* melted off what was left of the clothes he'd been wearing since materializing them in Gillian's dumpster. Once again, he was butt naked. Literally. His little tush bobbed up out of the surf, tail standing up like a tiny mast.

Blushing just a bit, Bartleby decided to will some swimtrunks onto him. He thought about his favorite pair and felt the fabric coming into existence over his fur. It wasn't so much that he was embarrassed to be nude - he'd been running around starkers for most of the day anyway - but he'd often been told he looked cute in his trunks. And he had to agree. His sky-blue pair with the white stripe went especially well with his fur.

Bartleby soon emerged onto Hell's sandy beach. He felt refreshed from his little swim. All around him the air was alive with feel-good energy. Loud, bouncy music was playing from a dozen different radios. Lots of people smiled at him, and he smiled back. He decided for the moment just to find a nice spot to sit and relax for a little while.

He walked along through the shouting, laughing, dancing, grinning crowd. The scene was bursting with so many bright colors, it could all have been taking place inside a kaleidoscope. Beach umbrellas dotted the landscape like overgrown wildflowers. Hundreds of types of snack foods pleased the nose as well as the eye. An eyepopping sightscape of multicolored swimsuits contrasted with the fur of their multicolored wearers.

Up the beach aways was a boardwalk pavilion with little shops, street performers, vendor carts and plenty more people. A stone wall jutted up out of the sand along the edge of the walkway and Bartleby noticed a perfect little spot at its highest edge. It was vacant, as far as he could see, and it was in just the right place to give him a great view of the whole beach.

The little bat fluttered up to his chosen space and got comfortable. The stone was smooth and cool on his bottom. The walkway's wooden guardrail was at his back, giving him something to lean on. The spot was just out of the way enough so that he could watch all the gathered beachgoers while still feeling isolated. Despite all the happy noise, Bartleby felt calm and peaceful.

Now that he had time to think, he did.

First off, what in the heck had happened to him when he'd tried to knock on the door? As far as he could figure, it was probably Satan's way of keeping his interruptions to a minimum. It was likely, in fact almost a certainty, that all sorts of fursons would want to see him at any given moment. Everyone values their privacy sometimes though. This was probably just the Devil's way of keeping the ninnies out of his hair. On the other hand, there had to be a way for someone to get his attention in case of an emergency without being whisked away to some random location. Razielphustar probably knew it. Or maybe only demons could knock on his door and get away with it.

And what of Llywyalla? Would she figure out a way in to see her old friend from before the fall? Probably. Bartleby chuckled just imagining the conversation they'd have. How long would it take him to figure out the specifics of her curse?

On the heels of that thought came another one; yiffing with Llywyalla would probably be pretty strange. If she was enjoying herself, she'd sound like she was being raped! He imagined her and the Devil going it it, the angel screaming with a great big grin on her face, "Oh, please stop! No, no! Don't do that! Pleeeeease stop!!"

Okay, that was kind of naughty, he had to admit. But funny!

Bartleby let his thoughts drift for a bit. Eventually he was just idly people-watching. Xander's conversation about fursons in hell being able to change their appearance came to mind again. An overwhelming percentage of the populace here were young and beautiful and sexy. Some fursons had even transformed themselves into their own private fantasies. He saw some people with wildly impossible fur colors. A few 'taurs. Even one lady with two heads!

And, as he looked closer, there seemed to be rather a lot of gender playfulness going on as well. Up til now, he'd thought only female hyenas had dicks. All sortsa people here had extra equipment though. And sometimes extra-extra-large equipment!

Bartleby also noticed that there were a heck of a lot of kids running around too. It was so subtle it took him a moment to notice it, but there were a lot more children here than he'd normally see in a crowd of this size. Much more than could simply be explained by a field trip, or friends bringing friends along. Razielphustar had told him he could stay a child if he wanted to. Apparently that was a popular option.

The little bat laid back against the wooden guardrail, wings folded behind his head. 'Why not?' he thought. Why not stay young for a while? Maybe he could even get a little younger if he liked. He'd heard bunches of grownups say stuff like 'these are the best years of your life, kid!' or 'how I miss those carefree days of my childhood!'. So, why not?

Bartleby wasn't entirely sure. Of course, he could grow up a little bit more, just a few more years; see if he liked it, and decide then. Maybe being a teenager would be cool. Or maybe he'd like it best staying just the age he was now.

That would have to be for his future-self to decide. For now he was just chillin'. Thinkin' about stuff. Nearly daydreaming.

He was a little tired. He hadn't slept in... Geez, how long had it been? It was hard to keep track of time down here. There was no sunlight in the cavern, so it was impossible to tell what time it was. And time was probably relative all over Hell anyway.

A sharp cry broke him instantly out of his thoughts. Bartleby's sensitive ears swiveled this way and that, finally zeroing in on a little toddler kitten wandering the beach. The small boy was crying his heart out, obviously looking for his lost mama.

Bartleby was pleased to see other fursons instantly getting up from their beach towels and sand castles to help the little one out. The young bat was just about to go offer his aid as well, when he caught sight of something flying in from down the beach aways.

The shape slowly became clearer as it came closer. Bartleby's mouth hung open. It was a bat. Just like him. Another grey-furred bat, wearing a lifeguard's uniform.

And he was a *hunk*!

The bat dude pulled off a graceful landing amongst the fursons gathered around the toddler and immediately took charge. Bartleby noticed his fur was a little browner than his own, and that the other bat's hair was long and sun-bleached. He looked to be around twenty-five or so. He was tall and nicely muscled and incredibly handsome. He looked just like the archetypical surfer dude.

The lifeguard bat kneeled down to talk to the lost kitten for a bit, then took to the air again, ever-so-gently cradling the wee one in his footclaws. He flew his tiny passenger way up high over the heads of the other beachgoers. The toddler looked incredibly excited. He stared down in awe at all the tiny people below him.

The kitten suddenly started pointing and shouting. Bartleby stood up to get a better look. He realized a lot of people were doing the same. This little real-life drama was fascinating.

The bat dude expertly transferred the kitten from his feet to his winghands as he landed. Immediately, a feline family rushed over and lovingly embraced their son. They heaped praise upon the lifeguard with happy tears in their eyes. Lots of people clapped, and Bartleby would have too if he hadn't been so far away.

Bartleby sat back down and smiled. He felt good inside all of a sudden. That little episode had really lifted his spirits, and he wasn't sure why.

Eventually, it came to him. He'd just seen the true face of Hell. Beyond all the classically hellish imagery and the fake scares, behind all the butcher shops and trap doors and lakes of fire, this was a genuinely nice place. It was just like Razielphustar and Mrs. Schaddenfreude, and even the Devil himself. A slightly scary front masking a good, gentle, loving heart. And even the surface wasn't so scary once you got used to it.

It was heartening to see so many people instantly willing to help that little kitten find his parents. When someone was in trouble, everyone immediately became family. And that handsome bat had swooped in and saved the day just like a superhero!

Bartleby drew his knees up to his chest and rested his chin on them. He smiled peacefully, overwhelmed by his realization. Hell was probably the nicest place he'd ever been to. It was fun and exciting, and at the heart of it, everyone cared about each other.

"Wow..." he said softly to himself.

"What're you 'wow'ing about, little guy?" came a cordial voice from over his shoulder.

Bartleby glanced back. And nearly toppled off the wall!

It was the lifeguard!

		***

He was even more handsome up close! Bartleby felt his heart beating like a triphammer. If he'd ever doubted that he was gay, all those doubts were erased forever in an instant. True, he thought Lexi and Gillian were cute. True, he thought Llywyalla was beautiful. True, he even thought Mrs. Schaddenfreude and Mrs. Oakley were sexy.

But this guy was fuckin' _gorgeous_!!

The younger bat's goggle-eyed stare of awe tickled the lifeguard pink. He grinned warmly, both appreciative and a little bashful.

"Uh..." said Bartleby lamely. 'Damn, that was intelligent,' he scolded himself.

The bigger bat chuckled and leaned on the guardrail from the other side. He looked down at the little guy and thought he was adorable. "What's yer name?" he asked affably.

"B-Bartleby."

The lifeguard reached over the wooden fence to take Bartleby's winghand in his own. "I'm Criss Nero. Criss like hiss. No 'h', two 's'es."

The younger bat accepted the strong grip. "Bartleby's spelled pretty much how it sounds. And my last name's Fletch. Not really that cool, huh?"

"Naw, Bartleby's a cool name! Are you kidding?" Criss took a firm hold of Bartleby's wing and effortlessly lifted him up over the fence and deposited him on his feet in one smooth motion.

Bartleby was seriously impressed with Criss' demonstration of gentle strength. "Whoa!"

The big bat chuckled. "I saw you staring at me while I was flying, so I thought I'd come over and say hi."

"I was wondering how you found me," Bartleby said. "And, 'Hi'," he added with a weak smile.

"Hi to you, too, little guy," Criss said breezily. "So, were you astounded beyond words at my daring rescue of the li'l squirt, or were you just checking out my pythons?" he asked, giving his biceps a magazine-cover-pose flex.

Bartleby's cheeks turned three shades of red. "Uh... I didn't... Uh..."

Criss let out a big laugh and patted his new young friend on the back. "Dude, it's okay! I'm flattered, honestly. You don't have to be ashamed if you like looking at me."

Bartleby smiled shyly. The bigger bat's voice was just about the friendliest he'd ever heard. Big and booming and breezy, but also full of heart.

The lifeguard smiled a little nervously. "I think you're handsome too. ...If you don't mind me saying so."

This time Bartleby blushed six or seven shades. "Um, really?" He wrapped his wings around himself, a little embarrassed and a little excited. "Thanks."

Criss kneeled down to the boy's eye level. "You new here?"

Bartleby nodded.

"It's cool. I've only been here a few years myself. Got caught in this wicked undertow back home. Sunk like a rock, but I managed to save a friend's daughter doing it. So it all works out."

"Wow, really?" Bartleby said. This guy really was a superhero!

Criss nodded. "Hey, you here with anybody?" he asked, sounding even more shy now.

Bartleby was starting to catch on why his new friend was acting so nervous. Could it be they were both crushing on each other? "Nope. I'm by myself."

"Would you like to come sit with me on my lifeguard stand? It's got an even better view of the beach than here."

Bartleby turned on his brightest smile. "Sure! That'd be great!"

Criss grinned as he stood up. "Cool! Let's fly there. Just follow me. Let's see how fast you can go."

"I'm pretty fast," Bartleby bragged a little. He stood up too and gave his back muscles a good stretch.

"So show me, pipsqueak!" he called out kiddingly. Criss took off like a bullet, his warm laughter trailing behind him.

"Nobody calls me a pipsqueak! ...and lives!" Bartleby declared dramatically. He leapt into the wind as well, laughing, tailing the older bat easily. And also getting a great view of his butt in those tight little red shorts!

		***

Criss made it to the elevated wooden platform first, but by a slim margin. He'd given up going easy on Bartleby after a few seconds. He was honestly impressed at how speedy the boy was.

He pulled off a nice trick landing, doing a somersault in midair and plopping down butt-first in his chair. A second later, Bartleby barrelled into him. Criss found himself with a giggling little boy in his lap, and, naturally, proceeded to tickle him a bit.

Bartleby yelped with laughter as he fought to extract himself from the merciless wingtips of the bigger bat. He finally squeezed himself out like a watermelon seed and plopped down on the side of the platform. It was more than just a chair on stilts. It had enough room along the edge for five or so other people to sit comfortably with their legs dangling off the side. The white-painted wood was warm and comfortable, worn down from years of use. There was also a cooler and a brown paper bag up here, possibly containing snacks.

Criss turned around and patted Bartleby on the back. "You're a really good flyer, kid! Fantastic for your age. I mean it!"

"Thanks!" Bartleby said brightly. It was really neat finding another bat to talk to about stuff like this. Sure, he and Chuck talked about bat stuff all the time, but Criss would have new perspectives on things since he was older. "I kinda suck at hovering, but everyone knows I'm fast. The old ladies on my street sometimes pay me quarters to go pick up stuff for 'em at the grocery store. Heck, I'd do it for fun anyway!"

Criss tussled the boy's bushy mop of headfur. "You seem like a really nice kid, Bartleby," he said sincerely.

"Thanks, Mr. Nero."

Criss grimaced a bit. "'Mister'? Dude, just call me Criss. Only my high school teachers ever called me Mr. Nero. Even my old boss called me Criss ."

Bartleby nodded. "Okay, cool. Just don't call me Bart, Barty, Barry or anything like that. No one's allowed to call me Barty but Chuck."

"Chuck?"

"My big brother." He paused, just for a moment, wondering how long it'd be before he got to see Chuck again.

Criss knew that look. There were plenty of old friends and family he missed since coming here. He knew eventually he'd see all of them again someday, but being separated even for a short time from people you care about is always hard.

"Say, Criss?" Bartleby started shyly.

"Mmm?"

The boy shuffled his feet a bit, leaning on the older bat's armrest. "When you said I was handsome, and that it was okay if I liked looking at you... does that mean..." he trailed off hesitantly. He thought he knew what Criss meant, but it was nearly impossible to just come out and say things like that.

Criss fixed him with a serious, gentle gaze. "It means exactly as much as you're comfortable with it meaning," he said softly.

Bartleby nodded. "I'm comfortable with it meaning a lot of stuff," he said with a tiny smile.

The big bat reached out to place his winghand atop the boy's. "Is this okay?"

Bartleby's smile got a bit wider. "Mmm hmm."

Criss ran his thumbclaw up the soft short fur of Bartleby's arm, creating a shiveringly delicious sensation. "Is *this* okay?"

Bartleby's smile got a whole lot bigger. "Mm hmm!"

"How about this...?" Criss leaned closer and closed his eyes. He puckered up, but let the boy come halfway if he wanted to.

A moment later, two bat muzzles came together in a soft first kiss. Bartleby felt like he was in Heaven and fireworks were exploding all around him.

Criss pulled back after a few wonderful seconds. "Would you like to sit on my lap, little guy?" he asked in barely above a whisper.

Bartleby just nodded, smiling ear to ear (which is quite a feat for a bat!). He let Criss' wing guide him as he hopped over the armrest to settle in on this gorgeous, gentle, kind, grown-up bat's lap. He felt the warmth of Criss' thigh right through their swimtrunks. It made his little tail wag.

Criss nuzzled the younger bat's ear. "I don't want you to be uncomfortable with anything, Bartleby. You can say no whenever you feel like it. I just saw you staring at me and thought you were one of the cutest little boys I've ever seen. I thought maybe you might like hanging out with me for a bit."

Bartleby leaned back against Criss' wide chest. He really appreciated those words. He could tell Criss was probably more nervous about this than him, and with understandable reason. But Bartleby _did_ want to hang out with him. And if it was okay, maybe even do more than that. Getting to yiff with Xander and his family had been one of the most exciting experiences of his life. Getting the chance to yiff with this amazingly handsome hunk of a bat would be beyond awesome!

"I *would* like that," he said sweetly. "I think you're probably the handsomest guy I've ever seen."

Criss chuckled and tickled Bartleby's tummy a little, getting an adorable giggle in response. "So, um, if it's not prying, when'd you realize?"

"Realize what?"

"That you were... You know..." He made a swishy hand gesture.

Bartleby couldn't resist a laugh. "A fag?"

Criss winced a little. "Naw. Geez, I hate that word!"

"I'm sorry," Bartleby said immediately.

Criss patted his thigh. "It's okay. I just had a really rough time coming out."

"I just sorta started figuring it out a year or so ago," said Bartleby. "I don't think anyone else knows. Maybe Chuck does, I dunno. I've been almost too scared to admit it to myself so far."

The older bat smiled bittersweetly, knowing all too well what that felt like. "You seem okay with it now."

Bartleby nodded. "When I came here, this really nice demon named Razielphustar told me that it was okay; that there's nothing wrong with being gay. It's like I was waiting all this time for someone to say that to me."

"I know *exactly* how that feels," Criss said. "I first came out to my dad. We were always really, really close. I could tell him stuff I wouldn't even dream of telling my best friends. But I was still scared shitless about telling him I liked looking at other guys' butts up at the gym."

Bartleby chuckled. He'd done that one or two times in the locker room. When he was _absolutely_ sure no one would catch him, that is.

"But finally I got up the courage. And he was so cool about it! He just gave me a hug and told me he didn't care who I loved, just that I was happy."

"Wow, that's great!" Bartleby felt a twinge of sadness though. He knew his own father probably would have thrown him out of the house if he'd ever found out.

Criss sighed and rolled his eyes. "My *Mom*, on the other hand... She was a different story. I told her and she flipped the fuck out. Told me it was because I didn't go to church enough, because I went out surfing with 'weirdos' all the time. That it was the TV's fault, that it was society's fault. All this crap about what 'caused it', as if I'd caught some kinda disease." He took in a sharp, deep breath. "She blamed herself, that's what it really was. She thought she'd done something wrong and screwed up her only son for life. Dad tried to talk some sense into her about a hundred times but she'd never listen.

"I told my best friend, Scott, and he didn't stay my best friend for very much longer. The whole school found out, and in a few weeks I found out exactly who my real friends were. They were the only four people in the school who didn't treat me like a leper. Buncha dicks. I dropped out, got my GED, said goodbye to Dad, moved to the coast, made a lot more friends than I expected, screwed around a bit, became a lifeguard, saved Girard's daughter and wound up here talking to you. That's my life story. Roll credits."

Bartleby clapped. "Bravo. Four stars!"

Criss took a tiny bow. "Thankyew, thankyew."

Smiling softly, feeling peaceful sitting on this nice grown-up's lap, Bartleby ran his winghand along Criss' muscly arm. "I don't know what the heck it would've been like if I'd told anyone. My mom probably would have been okay with it, but my dad would've gone a lot more nuts than your mom did. He's a big jerk. He's a bully. He..." It was out before he could stop himself. "...He killed me."

Criss immediately wrapped the boy in a tender hug. "Jesus, seriously? Damn. I'm so sorry to hear that. And this musta been recent too, right?"

The little bat nodded. "Just yesterday. We got in a fight and I hurt him and ran off, and when he found me he ran me over in the car."

Barely believing anyone could do such a thing to such a sweet little boy, Criss gave Bartleby a firm, comforting kiss on top of his head. "Poor li'l guy..."

"Thanks," Bartleby said softly. "I don't think it's even sunk in all the way yet either. I've been doing so much fun stuff since I got here, I haven't really had a lot of time to think about it. And maybe that's a good thing. I'd rather have fun and meet new friends right now than just sit and cry and feel like shit. That can wait. I don't want to get all depressed over this."

Criss tenderly petted the boy's fur. "Hey, it's cool. That's really brave of you. But don't let it go too far. You can't run from it forever. Sooner or later, you're going to have to sit down and cry over this. I did. Big strong macho guy like me, and I cried like a freakin' baby. I lost all my friends, my family, everything and everyone I loved. And yeah, I'll see them again someday when they die too, and yeah, I've made a lot of new friends and met up with some old ones since coming here. But it still hurts. And that's okay. Let it hurt. Deal with it. It's a lot better than just ignoring it and letting it eat away your heart after too long."

Bartleby did cry a little bit. Just a few tears. But they did feel good in a way. Criss was right. He knew he'd have to face the fact someday soon that he was really, truly, honest-to-gosh dead. And that meant dealing with all the sad stuff that went along with that.

But it could wait. It _would_ wait. The little bat's heart was even telling him that now was not the time to break down. All through this strange and wonderful day, he'd embraced the strangeness, enjoyed meeting new people and doing new fun, scary, exciting things. It wasn't just a big distraction; it was proving to himself that it was still okay to feel happy. It was okay, even, to feel a little bit of relief over not having to live in that house anymore. He loved Mom and Chuck and Tricia and Mandy with all his heart. But if he never had to hear Dad screaming and yelling and blaming him for stuff ever again... Well then, that was okay.

He didn't want to mope around and be sad though. Not now. He wanted to feel good. He wanted to feel warm and safe. Just like he did now, sitting on Criss' lap.

		***

The two bats talked for quite a while, not just about heavy topics like coming out and bein' dead, but also about bat-type stuff. Criss gave Bartleby some tips on hovering. Bartleby asked Criss what it was like having smaller ears and no noseleaf. It was really nice being able to talk about stuff that all of his non-chiropteran friends just went 'huh?' at.

Without even realizing it, the warmth of Criss' lap, the handsomeness of his face and body, and the compassion of his smile, all conspired to make Bartleby unwittingly pitch a tent in his trunks.

"Oh, hey..." Criss blushed and pointed out the little boy's bulge.

Bartleby 'eep!'ed and was about to cover it, but stopped himself. Instead, he just looked up to the bigger bat and grinned. 'You gave me that', his grin said.

"Feelin' yiffy, Bartleby?" Criss asked gently.

The little bat nodded.

Despite having opened up so freely to one another already, they were still almost strangers. And Criss had always been chivalrous at heart. He did want to do more than just cuddle with this little cutie on his lap, but he also wanted to be certain that Bartleby wouldn't feel at all forced into anything.

A moment later, Bartleby squeaked. He'd felt something poke his tush. "I wonder what that is?" he asked, giggling.

Criss bit his lip and blushed. "Well, I'm feeling kinda yiffy too. Would you like to do something together? It's up to you."

The boy really appreciated how respectful Criss was being. "Sure I would," he said sweetly. He stepped down from the lifeguard's chair, standing in front of it and looking down at the lump in Criss' swimsuit that was even bigger than he'd expected. "Can I see it?"

"Only if I can see yours, little guy."

"Deal!" Bartleby watched in awe as Criss pulled his trunks down, revealing a truly magnificent specimen of manhood. His cock wasn't too long, but it was real thick 'n meaty, the color of red wine. His sheath looked like it had been cut back a little. And his balls were enormous. Like grey-furred tennis balls! "Shit!" Bartleby yelped in amazement.

Criss chuckled. "Hope that was a compliment and you're not scared of it," he kidded.

"No way! It's really cool-looking!" Bartleby said, nearly salivating.

"And, your half of the bargain...?" Criss coaxed.

"Oh, yeah, right." Bartleby pulled down his swimsuit too. He stepped out of them, kicking them off to the side a little, proudly showing off his boy bits. "What'dya think?"

Criss studiously appraised the little boy-nummies. "Nice, very nice! You're even cuter in just your fur, Bartleby."

The little bat giggled a 'thank you'. "Hey, um, d'you think maybe I could give you a... A blowjob?" he asked timidly.

The lifeguard was quite pleasantly startled by the offer. "Really? Um, you don't have to..."

The boy looked more than a little disappointed.

"...But if you really want to, then hell yeah!"

Bartleby grinned widely. "Cool!" He eagerly kneeled right down between Criss' legs. There was a small area of the platform that jutted out in front of the chair just enough for him to stay comfortably on his knees with his feet hanging over the edge.

The little bat stared in wonderment at the dazzling penis just inches away from his eyes. Mr. Oakley's had been really cool, but Criss' was even cooler. It exuded the same sense of strength that Criss himself gave off. It looked manly and powerful, without being an overgrown monster. And it looked hard enough that Criss could've probably punched through plywood with it.

Bartleby leaned in and took a sniff. Musky male aroma filled his nose. He closed his eyes and murred. Damn, that smelled good! Sweaty ballsac odor. So strong and alluring!

Seeing the little one so enamored of his dick made Criss even more aroused. He loved getting yiffy with cubs, not only because they were so darn cute, but also because they were always so energetic. Bartleby looked like he was perfectly ready to play.

"It smells so good!" the little bat cooed.

"Thanks!" Criss replied. "Do whatever you like with it. Go to town. Have fun!"

Bartleby certainly didn't need to be told that. He was already having fun! He reached up to reverently wrap his thumbclaws around the huge penis. It throbbed warmly in his grip. Bartleby was equally aroused and apprehensive. Could he possibly hope to fit this giant thing in his mouth? He'd dislocate his jaw!

Eventually, he gathered up enough courage to go through with it. His first blowjob. The gayest act a guy could perform. And in public, in front of thousands of other people! No turning back now. If he did this, it would mean once and for all accepting that he wasn't a straight-arrow anymore.

Eyes closed, tail flicking, Bartleby leaned forward and took Criss' cocktip into his mouth.

The big bat gripped the wood of the platform with his footclaws hard enough to make it splinter. "Holy shit!!" he exclaimed in joyful shock.

There. It was done. There was a cock in his mouth. And to Bartleby's delight, it wasn't bad at all! The taste was very strong. Salty and meaty and male. He lapped gently at the big mushroom head. It was soft and almost purple. He poked the tip of his tongue into the tip of the older bat's slit and tasted a bit of pee and a bit of pre.

Criss reached down to lovingly wrap his wing around Bartleby's back. "That feels killer, squirt! Keep going!"

"Okay!" Bartleby said brightly. "This is a lot better than I'd imagined!" He went back down on his new friend's meat. He'd realized that there was no way he could swallow it all, so he'd just have to lick and kiss and nibble all around it instead. He bit playfully at Criss' head, trailing his sharp little fangs along the sensitive flesh and getting a startled, appreciative hiss in response.

"Dude! Yes, do that!!" Criss yowled.

Bartleby was more than happy to comply. His tail wagged like a puppy. He felt proud that he was doing something nice for his new friend. He bit lightly all up and down Criss' shaft. He nuzzled his noseleaf in the soft, smelly fur of that grey-furred nutsack. He gave the big bat cock before him several long licks from bottom to top. He had no idea if he was doing this right; he was just trying out everything he could think of that he thought might feel good.

Criss thought he was doing a fine job for a beginner. A little erratic, sure, but the energy of it was phenomenal. That long boy tongue and those pointy little teeth seemed to be everywhere at once, doing all sorts of things to him! "Aw, Bartleby, thank you so much!" the big bat cried out lovingly. He skritched behind the boy's ears and petted his fur all over.

Bartleby really liked the gentle touches. He felt wonderfully content inside. He loved that he was making Criss happy, and Criss was trying to make him feel good too. And succeeding!

Criss' head lolled about, lost in the sensations of the adorable boy's yiffy attention. He moaned and groaned and grunted in lusty pleasure. Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed a small group of other guys who were watching their little show with great interest, and with tented trunks. Criss gave them a thumbs up and a huge, smug grin.

Bartleby was having more fun than he'd ever expected. He didn't feel bad about this at all! He'd thought lots of times about what it would be like to have another guy's dick in his mouth. He'd gone online and read a few stories and looked at a few pictures on the subject. He'd masturbated furiously over them and prayed his parents wouldn't find out. He'd worried that when the time came to actually try something like this, he'd feel guilty and ashamed and generally awful inside. Instead, he had a bright smile on his face and he was giggling around the the hot bat meat in his mouth. This didn't feel dirty at all! Maybe a little naughty, but naughty wasn't so bad. It was just like cuddling with Xander's family. He was doing this because he thought Criss was a neat guy and he wanted to do something nice for him. And because this was fun all by itself!

"Ohhhh, that feels awesome! Bartleby, you're doing such a good job! Thank you so much," Criss moaned tenderly. He petted the little boy's ears and patted his back. "I love you, little guy..."

"I love you too, Criss!" Bartleby burst out. He looked up at the bigger bat's face and gave him a megawatt smile, trickles of drool and pre running down his chin whiskers. Just hearing the words 'I love you' made his heart soar even further. Then he went back to the task at hand, lovingly attacking the big bat cock with renewed vigor.

"B-Bartleby! I think I'm gonna spurt pretty soon!" Criss warned.

"No problem!" Bartleby did his best to make sure it would be a spectacular ejaculation. He wrapped as much of his mouth as he could around the bigger bat's cockhead, lapping at it, gnawing it, kissing it and giving it as much attention as he could.

Criss gnashed his teeth and felt his own personal volcano erupt.

Bartleby laughed in surprise as the first spurt shot out before he was ready and splattered all over his nose! He held his mouth open and his tongue out and tried to catch the rest. Criss' cum tasted a lot stronger than his own. Bartleby had had plenty of experience lapping up his own white stuff from his wingtips (and one time, his foot), so he was used to the taste enough that a full grown man's semen wasn't too much for him. The quantity of it was still a bit too much though, and a lot of it ended up on his chest, his chin and his cheeks.

Criss slowly exhaled a long, deep breath. He lifted Bartleby up into his lap again and gave him a hug. He heard some of the looky-loos down below cheering and whistling, but he ignored them for now.

Bartleby melted into the warm hug. He leaned in and gave Criss a great big kiss. "That was fun," he said happily.

"I'd say it was a bit more than just fun," Criss quipped. The sight of this sweet little cub covered in cum was amazingly sexy. His white stuff was all over Bartleby's face and chest. "Here, lemme get some of this off of you..."

The bigger bat's long tongue snaked out to lap at Bartleby's messy fur. The little bat giggled at the sensation. It tickled! He snuggled happily up to his new friend as Criss got him all cleaned up again.

The lifeguard took his time, going slow and gentle, doing what he could to thank Bartleby for that wonderful blowjob. He lapped up all the cum from Bartleby's fluffy chestfur and cheeks. He licked all around the boy's muzzle, then pressed their lips together in a romantic French kiss.

Two serpentine bat tongues intertwined in each other's mouths. Man and boy, holding one another close, loving each other wholly.

		***

After a little while longer of cuddling and fur ruffling, someone gave the lifeguard platform a sudden shove.

Criss looked up. "What th-?"

An athletic brunette lioness looked up at the two of them. She was also wearing a lifeguard's uniform, plus a playful grin. "Yiffing on the job? Tsk tsk, Criss!"

"Oh, come on, like you don't!" he called back with a grin. He sat back in the chair and stretched. "Bartleby, meet my nymphomaniac co-worker Becky."

Bartleby chuckled and gave her a wave as he got up off Criss' lap.

"I am not a nymphomaniac!" Becky huffed, mock-angrily. "He just won't let me jump his gorgeous, hunky bones, that's all!"

Criss laughed out loud. "How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bi? This is not a hard concept!" he responded playfully.

Becky turned her nose up. "You're just playing hard to get! I'll rewire you one of these days!"

Bartleby found their rapport amusing. He imagined they'd probably acted out this little scene dozens of times.

Criss tossed the boy a wink. "I'll give her a good hard fuck one of these days. She's earned it," he whispered.

The little bat hid a snort behind his wings.

"Who're you babysitting?" Becky asked.

"I'm Bartleby," he called down. "And he's not babysitting me, I was giving him a blowjob!"

Both adults cracked up at Bartleby's proud declaration. "A really good one, too!" Criss added.

Becky's smile was much sweeter now. She valued Criss as a good, true friend, and while she really did have a crush on that gorgeous, exotic body of his, she'd never really pressure him into sex if he didn't want to. "Well, your shift's up, ya big stack of man-meat."

"Aw, really?" Criss turned a frown to Bartleby. "Sorry, dude. I'm off for the night. You're welcome to come back to my pad and hang out for a while if ya like."

"I'd like to, but it's been a long day and I'm starting to get tired," he said sadly. "I promise I'll find my way back here again sometime. You're a really nice guy, Criss. I loved tasting your cock. But I liked talking with you even more."

The big bat smiled warmly and pulled his new little friend into one more hug. He kissed Bartleby on top of his head and up and down his ears. "You're really a sweet kid, Bartleby. I liked talking with you too. Anytime I'm here, you can come and sit with me on my lap. We can do more yiffy stuff, or we can just chill out and talk and have some snacks. I'd be happy doing anything with you, little guy."

Bartleby rubbed his cheekfur against Criss'. "Me too. I'll come back soon, I promise."

"And next time, I promise I'll be the one giving you a blowjob that'll knock your socks off!"

When they were all hugged out, Criss lifted up Bartleby and very gently handed him down to Becky, who in turn placed the boy back on solid ground again. "Lucky little bat," she told him.

"You know, you're like, the fifth furson to tell me that today," he mentioned.

The lioness climbed up the side of the lifeguard stand and gave Criss a friendly kiss on the cheek at the top. "See ya tomorrow, Superbat," she whispered in his ear.

Criss gave her a kiss too. "Likewise, babe. And maybe we can fuck, too."

"Really?" she asked eagerly.

He grinned. "Yeah, right! Dream on, ya horny nutball!"

She cracked up and playfully slapped at him as he jumped off the platform and took to the air once again. Criss circled the stand a few times and made sure to wave to Bartleby as he passed by. "Peace and love, little dude!" he called out.

"Peace and love!" Bartleby shouted back. He waved and waved as Criss spread his mighty wings and flapped off across the beach, soaring effortlessly away until he was just a tiny speck against the bright glow of the sea of lava.


	*   *   *   *   *


-CHAPTER TWELVE-

"Guess who?"

A pair of paws suddenly shot out and covered Bartleby's eyes.

"Waaah!" he yelped. "I don't know, I don't know!"

Whoever it was giggled. "Come on! Guess!"

That cute laugh did sound familiar... "Lexi?"

The little black paws lifted away, then spun the surprised young bat around. There was his hyena friend from earlier, who he'd last seen becoming a snack for a snake. "Hi!" she squealed excitedly. "What a coincidence! My gramma and I just showed up a little while ago. I saw you up there cuddling with the lifeguard. Way to go! You were all shy 'n stuff this afternoon!"

"Well, I've had some practice being not-shy," he said with a slightly-bashful smile. "So, how was getting digested?"

"Oh, it was WONderful!" She twirled around happily in her cute purple two-piece. "It took a really long time, and then I came out as a big pile of stinky poop!" She giggled. "Some people get grossed-out by that part, so they just hop a portal outta there before it happens. Not me! I always go in one end and out the other!"

Bartleby could not believe he was hearing this. And Tricia was always talking about how gross *boys* were!

"Wanna meet my Gramma?" Lexi asked abruptly.

"Um, sure. Okay." He guessed he could wait a little while more before he made his way back to his room for the night.

The exuberant young hyena skipped off down the beach, tail wagging behind her. Bartleby hustled to keep up with her. The girl was certainly speedy.

She stopped at a colorful handwoven beachtowel, where her gramma was sitting under a blue umbrella, waiting for her. She was not at all what Bartleby had first envisioned. She was a very atypical gramma indeed. The pretty hyena lady appeared to have customized her appearance a bit, but not too much. She was mature, and a little plump, but she looked just fine nonetheless. She seemed genuinely happy with herself and her body, just from the 'vibe' she was giving off.

"Well, hello!" she said welcomingly. "You must be Lexi's new classmate. She mentioned you when she finally got home today." She emphasized the word 'finally' and gave her granddaughter a little swat on her rear end.

Lexi squeaked and blushed, but she knew Gramma didn't really mind. "Hey, it's the snake's fault! He jumped right out of a tree and caught me fair and square! Bartleby saw it! What was I sposto do but lie there and be tasty?"

The older hyena pulled Lexi down beside her and gave her a hug. "How many times do you think you've been eaten since you got here, hmm?"

Lexi pondered that. "Oh, prolly a million."

Bartleby chuckled. "I got eaten too," he remarked.

"Really? Cool! Sit down and tell us about it!" Lexi piped up.

"Yes, come here, child. Sit in the shade," Gramma offered.

"Thank you." Bartleby accepted their invitation and sat down cross-legged beside the two hyenas. As he sat, he couldn't help but notice a small lump in Lexi's swimsuit. Weird! She was the first girl he'd ever met who also had to worry about getting tents at the beach. (Or not. Considering which beach this was, after all.)

"Would you like a sandwich?" Gramma offered, leaning over to rustle around in a picnic basket. "I have some soda too."

Bartleby shook his head. "I'm not real hungry now, but thanks very much anyway," he said politely.

She smiled at him, pleased that he was being a gentleman.

"So, howd'ja get eaten?" Lexi asked eagerly. "Did a nonev eat you up? Did you know there's sharks in the lava out there? Really! Some friends and me were out playing volleyball one day and this big fin swam right up to us. He ate up Jessie like she was nothing! And then he just took off! I swam after him and didn't give up until he crunched me up too!" she said proudly.

Bartleby laughed and related his story about being batter-dipped in Hell's kitchen. Lexi thought that sounded enormously exciting, since that was one method of cooking she hadn't tried yet. She told Bartleby all about the different times she'd been eaten. To his surprise, some of them actually sounded like things he might like to try. Gramma smiled to herself and read a novel, not at all fazed by her granddaughter's vivid descriptions of becoming various foodstuffs.

The two cubs chatted for a bit, until Bartleby's bladder decided to point out that, yes, even though he was dead he still needed to pee every now and then.

"Um, Lexi? I kinda gotta 'go'. Do you know where there's a porta-potty or something around here?" He'd been scanning the area and hadn't seen any obvious restroom signs anywhere.

She grinned wickedly at him, like she knew the most deliciously naughty secret. "You mean... You haven't gone to the bathroom yet?"

Bartleby shook his head. "Nope. What's weird about that?"

She stood up and addressed her gramma. "I'm gonna go show Bartleby where the restroom is. We might not come back alive..." she said ominously.

"That's nice," Gramma replied, not looking up from her book. She knew Lexi could take care of herself. And Bartleby was certainly in for a surprise, if her guess was correct as to where Lexi was about to take him.

Bartleby stood up and brushed some sand off his legs. "So, where is it? Is it far?"

"Nope, not far at all." Lexi extended her finger and tore open a portal for them. "This'll take us right where we wanna go. Or, where you wanna 'go'." She giggled.

Bartleby rolled his eyes. "Ugh, that was terrible!"

That only made her laugh more. "Come on, ya doof!" Grinning, she pushed him through the portal and then hopped right in after him.

		***

Nothing could possibly have prepared Bartleby for the sight his eyes beheld when he emerged from the portal.

It was impossible. It was obscene. It was hilarious.

It was the Biggest Toilet In The Universe.

He found himself standing on a dirt path that sloped down a hillside to the edge of a cliff. A cliff that circled around the rim of a toilet bowl the size of a baseball stadium. The tank towered above them, hundreds of feet in the air. The flusher looked as big as a bus. The raised seats looked like a humongous alien mouth, commanding all to come forth and sacrifice to it. Beyond the mammoth potty was an endless sea of roiling flame.

Hundreds of fursons were all gathered at the edge of the cliff, directing their streams and droppings down into the swirling maelstrom of the mother of all toilets. Some of them had to perch in bizarre, precarious ways to squat 'n dump without falling in. Some furs _did_ fall in; screaming in surprise, terror or laughter as they plunged into the swirling waters of the eternally flushing loo.

Lexi daintily stepped out of the portal and hugged her bat friend from behind. "Is that not the coolest thing you've ever seen in your life?"

He turned around to her, his eyes as huge as saucers. "*Please* tell me _all_ the bathrooms aren't like this!!"

She nearly laughed her tail off at his reaction. "Of course not! There's normal ones all over the place. This one's just the funnest! I heard Satan got the idea from some little kid whose big brother was scaring the crap out of him, telling him horror stories of what his first day at school would be like."

This did sound exactly like the sort of incredibly cruel lie an older sibling would make up. He had to admit, he'd told Mandy once that they made chocolate pudding out of crushed-up bug heads. Her reaction, and subsequent revenge with a water balloon, indoors, had been worth it.

Lexi started off running down towards the colossal porcelain throne. "Come on! Or did it already scare the piss out of you?"

"Ha ha ha," he deadpanned, running to catch up with her.

The two cubs managed to jostle into position at the edge of the cliff. Furs of every size and species were here, relieving themselves or indulging in messy play. Some furs were 'going' on each other instead of the toilet. Some of them were willingly jumping into the bowl's vortex, shrieking gleefully as they went round 'n round and were sucked down into the hole at the bottom.

"This makes the waterpark I used to go to look like a Slip 'n Slide," Bartleby quipped.

Lexi nearly bumped him off the cliff from leaning on him and laughing so hard.

"You ever fall in?" he asked her.

"Of course," she replied immediately, as if that went without saying. "If it's too gross for you, I won't push you in or anything, I promise. But it is *severely* cool. You're right; it's the best water slide ever!"

Bartleby chuckled. Out of all the weird places he'd found himself so far, this had to be the most surreal. Remembering that he had come here for a purpose, he turned towards the giant toilet, penis in hand, and tried to let himself go.

Peeing in front of hundreds of people did not come easily, however. He had to shake it around like he was strangling it to get the first little trickle to finally come out. The roar of the unremitting flushing helped a bit to get him going at a steady pace. And to make him wonder once more why the sound of running water made one feel like peeing in the first place.

He glanced over and noticed that Lexi had her bathing suit down around her ankles and was taking a whiz as well. He blushed and immediately looked away.

She laughed gently at his shyness. "It's okay, Bartleby. You can look if you wanna. I bet you've never seen a chick-dick before."

"Actually, I did. On the beach earlier. I didn't get a good look though."

"Well, here ya go. ...If you're curious."

Bartleby couldn't resist a peek. Lexi's genitalia were definitely interesting. She had a normal cunny, just like any girl, but her clitoris lengthened out to a thin, long penis where her pee-stream was coming out. Her cunny and cock were both jet black, just like Mr. Oakley's.

While he was checking out hers, she was checking out his. "You have cute balls, Bartleby," she said with a coy little smirk.

He grinned gratefully. "Um, thanks! Your stuff looks really neat too. Very unique."

"Thanks!" She licked her lips, looking a bit shyer. "Um, do you think maybe we could yiff sometime? You are really cute. And I've never been with a bat before. But I know my cock makes some boys nervous."

"Not Xander, apparently," he joked. "And, naw, I wouldn't mind. You're pretty, Lexi, and your cock is too."

She swooned at his compliment. Hardly any of the other boys at school had been so accepting of her differentness. "Really? Oh, Bartleby, that's so sweet!" She threw her arms around him in a hug.

Unfortunately, the suddenness of it overbalanced Bartleby, and he toppled back a bit, bumping into another furson beside him. When the other fur turned around to look, he accidentally gave the hapless bat a hard shove right towards the edge of the cliff!

"Whoa-o-o-oaaahh!" Bartleby cried out, wings pinwheeling, trying desperately to keep his balance. The roar of the enormous toilet thundered in his ears.

"Bartleby!!" Lexi gasped. She reached out to try to pull him to safety, but it was too late.

The ground crumbled beneath the little bat's feet and he went tumbling over the side of the cliff, down into the white water rapids below.

"Sorry!" called out the fur who'd accidentally pushed him.

Bartleby sputtered up to the surface. He could not believe he was being swept away in a vast sea of wee-wee. "EEEEEEWWW!!!" he howled.

Lexi watched worriedly as the potty whirlpool whipped her friend around. When he'd almost completed a full lap and was in earshot again, she called out to him, "Bartleby!! Are you okay!?"

"I guess so!" he shouted back. "Considering I'm up to my eyeballs in pee!"

The current took him on another circuit of the bowl. Lexi hollered at him again. "Well, goodbye Bartleby! I'd jump in too, but Gramma'd wonder what happened to me!"

"It's okay! I'm starting to like it!" He had to admit, this _was_ a wild ride. The current was fast and exciting. So long as he remembered to keep his mouth closed as much as possible, he was actually starting to enjoy himself. He had always liked going to the waterpark back home, after all.

As he looped around again, he picked out Lexi's voice one last time. "See you in school tomorrow!"

"Bye, Lexi!!" he bellowed back. He thought he caught a glimpse of her waving goodbye to him, but he was going so fast, he couldn't be sure it was actually her.

The vortex was pulling him ever closer to the dreaded toilet hole. 'This is the second time I've ended up in a toilet today,' he realized. 'Geeze, what an accomplishment!'

Closer and closer was he inexorably drawn towards that dark eye. There were lots of other fursons in the water besides him. Some looked like they were having the time of their lives. Some looked like they were about to puke. Some looked like they just wanted to get this over with as quickly as possible. He even saw a group of friends who had all jumped in together and were clinging tenaciously to one another and hooting wildly.

The whole situation was starting to amuse him now. He was being flushed down a toilet the size of a city block. If that wasn't comedy, he didn't know what was.

Not really scared much now, except for a little bit of carnival-ride-thrill, Bartleby wondered where he'd end up after this. Hopefully he'd be sucked up into another portal, rather than taking a ride through the pipes and splashing down in some equally exaggerated giant sewer. If that was the case, he'd just portal his ass out of there and go straight to bed.

Such speculation was about to become moot though. Bartleby was overcome with dizziness as the whirlpool whipped him around the final spins and finally swallowed him up into the toilet hole.

Bartleby held his breath as he was swept away down the drain.


	*   *   *   *   *


-CHAPTER THIRTEEN-

The next thing he knew, he was popping out of thin air over a lush tropical rainforest.

"Well, at least it's not another dumpster," he said to himself as he plummeted.

With the calm ease of someone getting used to such things, Bartleby acrobatically flipped himself over and caught the wind beneath his wings. He flapped a bit, testing the breeze, then started down on a gently descending spiral.

The jungle was admittedly quite beautiful from above. The nearly-full moon was high in the sky, bathing the lush, quiet landscape in various blues and purples. The trees seemed to stretch on forever, interrupted briefly every now and then by a hill or a river. Bartleby picked out all sorts of life sounds coming from below. Bugs chirping. Frogs peeping. Wings fluttering. Tiny paws scurrying.

The boy yawned silently. He *was* getting tired by now. He still wasn't sure just how long he'd been awake, but this certainly felt like one of the longest days he could remember. And unquestionably, the most eventful.

His feet were just now dipping down below the green canopy of the jungle trees. His surroundings immediately became darker once he was past the treeline. The sounds were amplified as well, changing from curious to sinister. This place was interesting and pretty, but kinda spooky too. Bartleby decided he'd forego exploring and just make himself a portal as soon as he touched ground.

However, he ended up touching something else first.

He felt a thin tickle across his foot.

"Huh?"

The next thing he knew, he tripped on whatever it was and his wings failed him. The young bat cried out in startled fear as he fell back onto a strange sticky surface. He felt something like tiny wires criss-crossing all over his back, holding him fast wherever they touched. His frantic thrashing did nothing more than get his wings stuck down as well.

Bartleby looked all around and couldn't see a thing at first, until a shaft of moonlight poked through the canopy of trees above. It illuminated a glistening, intricate pattern of silvery, interwoven lines all around him. 'Oh crap! I'm in a giant spiderweb!!' he realized.

He tried to think back to every nature show he'd ever seen about spiders. He knew they sensed when their webs had caught something from the vibrations the prey insect's struggling sent along the strands. Bartleby was the prey now. He desperately tried to stop his fearful trembling and keep perfectly still.

The night sounds seemed to grow louder. The jungle grew more menacing. Any second now, a gigantic spider would be coming to eat him up!

Bartleby looked all around, eyes wide and alert, but could only see the treetops above him. All else was shrouded in shadow.

And then, out of the darkness, came a sultry, predatory female voice. "I can hear your breathing, you know..."

Bartleby gulped.

He felt the web underneath him shift. He heard the tiny clicks of eight chitinous legs. He sensed something large coming closer and closer...

And then he was looking up into an upside-down face.

"Boo!" the spider said playfully.

The little bat jumped, then realized it wasn't a spider at all. Or was it?

In no hurry, the creature slowly made her way around Bartleby to position herself close by his side. She put an appraising finger to her lips. "Yes, yes. Quite satisfactory..."

Bartleby had never seen anything like her before in his life. Her bottom half was like any web-spinning arachnid. Her eight spindly legs were in constant languid motion, making clicking sounds like knitting needles. Her exoskeleton was a dark, dark violet, nearly black, with a red hourglass on her gigantic, round abdomen.

Her upper half, however, was that of a beautiful skunkwoman. She had short, snowy hair and mostly black bodyfur, with glistening white on her muzzle, chest and paws. Her eyes were a dull red. And her curved, narrow fangs caused her to speak with a very slight snakish lisp.

She might have been frightening on first glance, but her smile was small and soft, and betrayed her true nature.

"What are you?" Bartleby asked, awestruck.

"I am a spid'taur," the creature responded pleasantly. She reached down to gently place her satiny paws on the boy's cheeks. "Be not afraid, young one. You will not suffer, so long as you do not struggle."

"You're gonna eat me?" the little bat asked in a small squeak.

She leaned in close and grinned, purposely exposing her fangs. "But of coursssse..."

Bartleby relaxed, but not all the way. "Well, geeze. I don't mind if you do. If you'll just be gentle about it, I won't struggle at all," he told her.

The spid'taur smiled cheerfully. "Now that's what I like to hear! Willing prey always tastes better!" She gave Bartleby a pat on the head. "So, my midnight snack, what is your name?"

"I'm Bartleby." His fear was rapidly ebbing. It seemed he'd met yet another denizen of Hell with a scary first impression and a friendly spirit.

"Bartleby..." She rolled the name on her tongue. "A good name. I am Tasasha. The night is my mistress, and I am hers."

"Pleased to meet you," Bartleby said politely. He tried to raise his winghand for a shake.

She freed his wing from her sticky strands enough for him to do so. "The pleasure is all mine, little one. You look very tasty indeed." She perked up. "Perhaps I should use your body to lay my eggs inside of, hmm? My little ones would feast on you when they hatched," she suggested blithely.

Bartleby shuddered. That did not sound very appealing. "Um, if you don't mind, I'd rather you didn't. I'm kinda tired and I really should be getting to bed soon. If you wanna eat me though, that's okay," he replied diplomatically.

She leaned closer to nuzzle her muzzle against his cheek. "Understood, my young guest. Little boys do need their rest. I shall feast on you. And I shall make it as pleasant for you as I can," she pledged.

"Thank you very much." Bartleby had calmed down considerably by now. Tasasha was quite pretty, in an exotic way, and she seemed nice too. Plus, he thought getting wrapped up in a big cozy cocoon might actually be relaxing. Bartleby laid back on the comfy web and let her prepare him.

Tasasha sized the little boy up, making a guess as to how much silk she would need. She hummed softly to herself as she began her work. Her voice was fluid and soothing.

First, the spid'taur freed Bartleby's other wing and arranged both of them across his belly, like wrapping up a burrito. She placed his legs together and tucked his tail in too. Her slender white paws were exceptionally gentle. The whole time she worked, she hummed. A gentle moonlit melody to lull her prey into relaxation.

'What a nice way to end the day...' Bartleby thought. Even though he'd been a bit scared at first, now he felt calm and content. Tasasha was being very gentle with him. And he really liked her lullaby.

From her abdomen, Tasasha began to produce long strands of spider silk. Her paws were skilled from years of cocooning other fursons. She began at Bartleby's feet, giving each of his big toes a kiss before she started wrapping them up.

The little bat giggled. He did his best to keep still as the pretty spider lady went about her task.

Tasasha licked her lips at the thought of how good this tender little boy would taste. She bound him comfortably: not too tight, just enough so he wouldn't be able to move. She loved performing her before-meal preparations. It was an incredible turn-on for her. Binding her prey in her silk, then sinking her fangs into their flesh and listening to their life drain slowly away as she fed. Knowing all the time that they would be just fine in a little while and ready to be eaten again soon. Tasasha knew well the old saying, 'you will catch more flies with honey than with vinegar'.

Bartleby was very impressed at how fast Tasasha was working. She'd done his feet in seconds and was already most of the way up his legs. He guessed having six extra limbs helped quite a bit. He suddenly blushed and yipped a bit as she covered up his boybits.

His reaction pleased her. "Mmmm, you liked that, yes? Maybe I should bite it off, as an appetizer?" she purred teasingly.

Bartleby trembled and giggled. "I've already lost it three times today already. I don't mind!"

The spid'taur giggled too. "Such cooperative prey! Bartleby, you are a delight! And you are keeping so still, too. Thank you, little one." She gave him another kind pat on his head.

Tasasha spun more silk, collecting it and arranging it lightning fast with her paws and four of her legs. "I must admit, it is sometimes fun to catch frightened furs in my web and see the fear in their eyes as I wrap them up tight. But I believe I enjoy a smiling supper much more. When we are both enjoying the experience, the blood is much, much more flavorful."

The little bat felt a shiver go up his spine. "You're really gonna drink my blood? Like in some vampire movie?"

"Not quite, my sweet." Her silk flowed around him like being lowered into warm water, now reaching up to bind his wings to his sides. "We spiders have a much more efficient method. First, my venom will paralyze you. Then, it will begin to eat away at you, turning your insides to liquid so that I may slurp them out at my leisure," she said darkly, but with a playful smile.

This was all a very strange experience for Bartleby. One part of him was a little bit scared and another part of him was getting yiffy. She made it all sound creepy, and yet sensual at the same time. "So, have you ever eaten a bat before?" he asked conversationally.

She nodded. "Oh my, yes. The jungle bats fly into my web constantly. On purpose! They love being my food. Especially the little ones like you. They call me 'Auntie Tasha'." She smiled and chuckled warmly. "They're even a bother at times! They bring their friends along and sometimes I run out of silk before I've got them all wrapped up!"

Bartleby chuckled at the mental image of eager bats all clamoring to be next in line to get cocooned. Tasasha was up to his shoulders now. He felt her strands begin to tickle their way up his neck. "Um, do you think you could leave my eyes open? Y'know, so I can still see what's going on?"

Tasasha lovingly stroked the side of his face. "Yes, my darling. Of course. Trust me."

Her nimble paws spun her silk up his cheeks and over his mouth. She made sure to keep her strands slack enough so that he could talk, while still keeping that cute 'bound and gagged' look she enjoyed so much. She made certain to leave a wide enough strip of fur uncovered so the boy could see, as he'd requested. She enjoyed accommodating her prey's last wishes. Especially when they were being such a willing participant.

Finally, Bartleby felt her bind up his ears to the very tip. She bit off her strand and positioned herself at his side. She ran her soft, supple paws all up and down his smooth bound body. "There now, sweet boy. All done. How does it feel?"

Bartleby wiggled about, but all he could still move freely were his jaw and his eyelids. The rest of his body was completely immobilized. She'd done a good job. He knew he couldn't get away now, and that felt sort of exciting in a strange way. "It feels nice. Comfy. Like when I curl up in a sleeping bag."

"Not too tight?" she asked with genuine concern.

He shook his head as much as he could. "Nope. Just right."

The spid'taur gave him a sweet smile. "Good, good. I must say, you look both adorable and delectable right now. All wrapped up in my shimmering silver cocoon... Perfectly helpless..." She licked along her fangs in anticipation.

"I hope I taste good. And thank you, Tasasha. You've been really nice to me. I liked getting all wrapped up." He yawned again.

She leaned in close to kiss him on the forehead. "Feeling sleepy, little prey?"

He nodded.

"That's alright. My venom will help. It will relax all your muscles for you. Many of my past dinners have fallen asleep while I fed upon them. They tell me that my digestive fluids working on them is a very soothing sensation."

"Okay then. Eat me up. I'm ready," Bartleby said with a brave little smile.

She held the sweet boy bat close to her and nuzzled his neck. "Thank you, Bartleby, for helping me make you into a meal. I am sure you will be delicious."

Bartleby smiled and closed his eyes. He jerked and let out a small cry when her sharp fangs first broke through his skin, but the pain was over almost before it began. Soon he could feel the dreamlike, exotic tingle of her venom beginning to spread through his system.

"Goodnight, my dear prey..." Tasasha whispered lovingly.

"Goodnight..."

Bartleby felt his insides beginning to change. Shifting, loosening, melting. Becoming food for his new friend.

"Sleep, little one, sleep..." she cooed.

Bartleby felt his breathing slow, and finally stop. He could feel his whole body softening up. It was a wonderfully calming sensation.

Soon, he was fast asleep.

		***

Tasasha fed well that night. She drank deeply of the little bat boy in her arms. He was not the most filling meal she had ever consumed, but he more than made up for it by the sweet, serene expression on his face at the end. Knowing she had brought happiness to her prey gave the spid'taur a deep sense of fulfillment.

When Bartleby was all gone, she patted what remained of him on his head. "Thank you, little bat. You were very tasty indeed."

She placed his pelt aside, then crawled back into the shadows to her home. There, she joined her prey in slumber.


	*   *   *   *   *


-CHAPTER FOURTEEN-

Bartleby murred in his sleep. He yawned. He tugged his blankets closer and rolled over.

The sleep-dust began to fade from his mind, and the young boy yawned again and gradually awoke.

Before his eyes had opened, Bartleby checked in with his body. He could feel all the parts of himself emerging from his long, strange dream. He could tell he was wearing his fuzzy pajamas. His plushie fox Terry was held securely in his wings. His warm blankets were wrapped snugly around him like a spider's cocoon.

Cocoon...

Wait a minute...

For a second, the boy was completely confused. 'No, it was real! Wasn't it?'

He opened his eyes.

...And found he was back in his bedroom again.

He breathed a long sigh of relief.

Everything was as it should be. His toys were all in their boxes. His books were all on their shelves. His computer was sitting on his desk in the corner. His magic refrigerator was humming softly. His treasures from the dump were piled neatly on a table. The dim light of a torch made flickering shapes on the red stone walls of his little cave.

Bartleby cast off his blankets and sat up, yawning and stretching. He'd somehow ended up back in his fantasy bedroom again without even using a portal this time. He reached up to his neck, just to be sure, and felt two tiny bumps (rapidly healing) from where Tasasha had bitten him.

"Whew!"

So it _was_ all real. Thank goodness! He'd been scared for a moment. Sure, it would have been nice in some ways to wake up and find it had all been a dream. But to make so many friends in one night, and then lose them all the next morning, would be heartbreaking.

But no, that was not to be. It was all real. This was his dream room brought to life. He was in Hell, and he was dead, and that was alright. He knew he might have this same disoriented feeling for a while, of waking up unsure where he ought to be. But he knew in time he would learn to accept that this was his life now, his afterlife, and it was where he would remain forever.

Bartleby gave Terry a hug. "I'm glad you're still here with me," he told the little red fox. He sighed. "But I wish Chuck was too..."

He sat for a while in silence, looking back through all the memories of the wondrous day he'd had.

And from what he could tell, it wasn't even over yet. His internal chronometer was telling him he hadn't slept for long. Certainly not for hours. He'd probably woken up not too long after falling asleep in Tasasha's web.

He glanced over at the alarm clock on his endtable, but it was no help. It seemed to be displaying some kind of ancient runes.

Just then, there was a knock at the door.

"Who is it?" Bartleby called out.

A muffled but genial voice returned back, "Oh, just your friendly neighborhood Arch-Hellguardian..."

Bartleby jumped up and ran to the door. He flung it open and shouted with glee. He wrapped his arms around the squirreldemon standing there, grinning from ear to ear.

"Good to see you too, dear boy," said Razielphustar.

		***

The boy and the demon sat together on Bartleby's little bed and talked for a long, long time. Bartleby didn't feel sleepy at all now. The little bat sat side by side with his demon friend; Razielphustar hugging him and Bartleby hugging Terry. The young boy described in great detail all the adventures he'd had and all the new people he'd met.

Razielphustar was amazed at all the boy had gone through in such a short time. Many new souls spent their first day in Hell holed up in their rooms crying, or driving themselves deep into denial, or shouting up at the sky; demanding to know why they hadn't been accepted into the realm above.

But Bartleby, shy little Bartleby, had done none of those things. He had made the choice, deep in his heart, to get out and explore as much of his new home as he could.

Although it seemed to the boy that fate had swept him along from one bizarre and fascinating set of circumstances to the next, in reality he was more in control than he'd ever realized. Razielphustar knew the portals were much more than simply doorways. They could see into the deepest depths of a soul's thoughts and desires. Had Bartleby really wanted to spend the day in quiet contemplation, that first portal he had dropped the boy into would have taken him straight back to his room. And all the rest of the 'random' portals had known exactly what they were doing in selecting destinations for him. It was not the place, so much as the other people he would encounter, that guided their decisions.

Whether he knew it or not, Bartleby's greatest strength was that he gained happiness from bringing happiness to others. His was an honest and giving soul. By making so many new friends today, he had helped his own heart to heal from the horror of being struck down by his cruel father. By reaching out to others, by sharing smiles and laughter, he had helped himself to believe that his death was not his fault. That his father's blame had always been nothing but lies. That it was okay to not have to doubt himself anymore.

Bartleby was aware of none of it, but Razielphustar could see clearly the change in the boy. It wasn't just that he seemed happier now, but that he _was_ happier. In both mind and spirit.

The demon could not have been more proud of him.

		***

"...and then I felt her venom going through my whole body. It kinda felt like I was melting inside, but in a really neat way. I felt even sleepier. Then I could hear her starting to drink me. And I felt good about that. I liked knowing I was giving myself to her. I dunno why, but that just made me really happy."

Razielphustar smiled and patted the boy on the wing. "I completely understand, young one."

"So then I fell asleep, and then I was waking up here, in bed. I got really freaked out for a second. I was scared it was all just a dream."

Razielphustar 'hmm'ed curiously. "You mean, you wouldn't have wanted it to be?"

"Well, maybe. A little," Bartleby admitted. "It would've been really nice to see my family again. I would've given them all really big hugs. And you can bet your butt I'd be more careful around dad from now on!"

The squirreldemon chuckled sadly. "Yes, that would be a wise course of action."

Bartleby rubbed his cheekfur on Razielphustar's soft leather vest. "But yeah... I am glad it wasn't just a dream. I know I'll get to see Mom 'n Chuck and the others someday. And I met so many cool people today, and saw so many neat places. It'd be awful if it turned out none of it was real." He looked up to the demon's eyes. "Especially you."

Deeply touched by the kind words, Razielphustar gave the little bat a loving kiss. "Thank you, Bartleby. It would be just as saddening to me if you turned out to be only one of my dreams."

Grinning, Bartleby gave him a tiny pinch. "There, does that prove I'm real?"

The demon laughed and retaliated with a tickle attack. "Indeed it does, you silly little bat!" Bartleby's cute tummy made such an inviting target!

Bartleby laughed out loud and squirmed about, kicking his little furless feet. Razielphustar's nimble fingers skittered up and down his fur, making him feel all giddy.

Razielphustar stopped after a few seconds. He gave his sweet boy another hug. "Your laughter is beautiful, Bartleby. A symphony to my ears."

"Thanks. I like your voice too. You sound really wise and comforting."

"Thank *you*, little one. That's just what I try to be."

Bartleby nuzzled Razielphustar's chinfur with his nose. He had something important on his mind he'd been meaning to ask for a while now. "Hey, um... Remember earlier, in the cafeteria, when you ate me? And I asked if maybe we could be yiffy later?"

The squirreldemon nodded. "Of course I remember. Do you still want to? If you're tired and want to go back to sleep, I understand..."

"No!" Bartleby quickly refuted. "I do want to! I've been wanting to all day. Even when I was being yiffy with Criss, I was thinking about what it might be like to do stuff like that with you too."

Razielphustar ran his fingers through the boy's hair. "I've been thinking about being with you as well. All day long." He nuzzled Bartleby's ears. "So, what would you like us to do together? Whatever you like. Should I eat you again?" he asked teasingly.

"If you're hungry, I wouldn't mind," said Bartleby. "But I think I'd really like for you to yiff me. You know, in my tail hole..." he admitted shyly.

That was a surprising request. "Are you sure, little one? Wouldn't you rather I pleasure you?"

Bartleby shook his head firmly. "Nope. I wanna see what it's like having you hold me and put your big penis inside me. That'll be pleasant enough," he said with a grin.

In many ways, the demon was not surprised. The little bat did, after all, derive happiness from making others happy. It made sense he'd enjoy being on the submissive side of yiff. Razielphustar gave the boy's pajama-clad tush a pat. "Alright then. If it's what you want, I would love to yiff you as well. You are a wonderful, kind, handsome, beautiful boy, Bartleby. I can think of nothing I would rather do in this moment than to give you your heart's desire."

Bartleby smiled a broad smile and hugged the squirreldemon tight. His heart felt full of love and trust and joy.

Razielphustar glanced over at the torch on the wall and willed the flame to die down to an ember. The small scarlet room became draped in shadow.

The squirreldemon turned over on his side, scooping up his adorable little lover and tucking him snugly up against him. He pulled the blankets tightly around the two of them and embraced the soft, wiggly little bat.

Bartleby had his eyes closed tight and a great big smile on his muzzle. He felt so warm and safe! He loved feeling Razielphustar's body warmth surrounding him. He heard the rustle of the demon's silk trousers being pulled down and kicked aside. He felt something stiff and hot press lightly up against his bottom; he cooed in surprise and held his plushie fox tight.

With one arm wrapped tenderly around his sweet young bat, Razielphustar reached the other inside his vest and fumbled around until a small glass vial found its way to his paw.

Bartleby clearly heard the squeal of the glass stopper being removed. "What's that?"

"This is the finest lubricant in all of Hades, made from the refined saliva of the Great Wyrm of Kah'lan-Haardeih. It will make your little tailhole good and slippery, so I won't hurt you going in."

"Oh, alright," said Bartleby. He relaxed and waited patiently as Razielphustar pulled down his pajama bottoms and gathered a generous helping of the sparkling clear goo on his fingers. The little bat let out a low moan at the feel of the cool, slick substance being applied to his anus. His tail stood straight up and he held his breath.

Razielphustar inserted one finger with ease, then two, then three. "Perfect. Just right." He wiped the excess lube off his fingers onto his own member. He nuzzled Bartleby's fluffy cheek. "Are you ready sweetheart?" he whispered in the boy's ear.

Bartleby nodded. He was shivering in yiffy anticipation. "Uh huh..."

The demon pulled the little bat closer. He placed his leg over Bartleby's, locking them together. "Here we go..." He reached down to position himself, touching his tip to the boy's tiny hole, reveling in the heat and the slickness. He took a deep breath, then smoothly entered the little boy's bottom.

Bartleby cried out sharply, but out of pure pleasure. There was no pain whatsoever. Razielphustar's cock glided deep within him with zero resistance. His tailhole gladly. welcomed the demon inside. "Ohhh..."

Razielphustar shut his eyes tight. His fluffy tail curled. His tiny black wings fluttered in ecstacy. The boy's warm, tight tunnel was exquisite and his little love-moans were adorable. "Bartleby... sweet boy... dear little bat... my beautiful, beautiful boy... I love you so, little one."

The soft, heartfelt words made Bartleby's pleasure multiply tenfold. He squirmed happily on the firm squirrel pole impaling him. "I love you too, Razielphustar. I love you so much," he whispered. "That feels so good inside me. So big and warm. I love this. I'm so happy..."

The squirreldemon covered the boy's soft, velvety ears with kisses. "Little sweetheart. Charming boy. Darling bat. Grey-furred cutie. Little yum-yum. My furry miracle."

Bartleby murred in bliss at the swarm of endearments. He wiggled his butt down hard onto Razielphustar's hot cock, doing his very best to make the wonderful demon feel good too.

Holding the boy tight and safe in his arms and caressing him all over, loving the feeling of having this handsome young pajamaed sweetheart so close to him, Razielphustar began to push forward into Bartleby's round rump. He gave the boy's soft buttocks teasing squeezes. He nuzzled his snout though Bartleby's sweet-smelling hair and nipped playfully at his leafy ears.

Bartleby cooed and yipped and murred and made all sorts of cute happy sounds at Razielphustar's loving touches. He pushed back to meet the demon's thrusts, wanting to feel that hot, thick maleness as deep inside of him as it could go. He felt connected to Razielphustar now. Cemented together by much more than just flesh. By their souls. By their hearts...

And suddenly, as if for the first time, Bartleby noticed his heart was racing. His heart. His heart that he'd seen torn from his chest by the Devil, what seemed like an eternity ago. He had grown a new one. He could feel its steady pulse through every part of his body. He could feel the blood rushing through his ears. It was a euphoric sensation, and he was so glad it wasn't really gone forever.

Razielphustar could feel the boy's heartbeat too, and he knew what it meant. It usually took quite some time for a new soul to regrow their heart. What caused it was unthinkably simple and impossible to obtain by force. It came from joy. It came from accepting one's place in the grand realm of the afterlife. It came from making peace with who you were, and who you had become.

If he'd thought he couldn't be more proud of the boy, he knew now he was wrong.

The squirreldemon pumped harder into his darling little bat. Bartleby's mouth hung open in a perpetual moan of joy. Razielphustar tried his best to drive as much of himself as he could inside Bartleby's warm tailhole, and Bartleby was only too happy to help him try.

Razielphustar felt an incredible power building up inside of him, straining for release.

Bartleby felt goosebumps rippling up all over his young body.

"Oh, I love you, Bartleby!"

The two furs cried out in ecstacy as Razielphustar flooded the boy with cum. Bartleby felt a raging river of heat instantly fill his backside, warming his whole body in seconds. It felt like Razielphustar was erupting molten lava inside of him!

The demon hugged the little bat tight, nuzzling his neck, tears streaming down his cheeks. He howled like a wolf as his seed exploded into the boy. He held Bartleby's winghands in his paws and called out his name again and again.

The fire in the little bat's insides spread out and dispersed throughout his whole body, from his toes to his tail to the tips of his ears. He felt as if he were changing, becoming something totally new...

Razielphustar watched the boy's transformation with awe. He'd seen this phenomenon many, many times before, but it still brought amazement even to the eyes of an eons-old demon such as himself.

Bartleby's fur all stood on end, as if an electric current were being passed through him. His eyes were closed and his body went perfectly still, rigid as steel.

His form began to ripple and shimmer. His flesh turned into earth, then stone, then steel, then diamond, then again to flesh.

The color of his fur shifted, changing from grey to brown to red to orange to yellow to purest white. Soon, the boy appeared to be made entirely of light.

He glowed with the brilliance of a small star for several seconds.

Slowly, his illumination began to fade. His fur returned to normal, and his muscles relaxed.

He felt like he'd just ran all the way from Earth into the heart of the sun. He felt like he'd been torn into a billion pieces and scattered to every corner of the galaxy, only to flash back together again in a grand cosmic explosion. He felt like he had been reborn.

And, he realized he'd cum all over his blankets.

"Oops..."

Razielphustar reached into his vest and brought out a box of moist wipes. "Here, sweetheart."

Bartleby took the box with a nod and started cleaning himself up. "W-what just happened to me?" he asked, his voice shaky with wonder.

"You received the seed of a demon, dear boy," Razielphustar explained gently. "The first time it happens, it can cause some very interesting reactions. I'm surprised you didn't explode into atoms."

Bartleby gave him an 'are you _kidding_?' look.

"Oh, it's quite common. And you would have reformed in a few seconds anyway, good as new," he said reassuringly

The boy mopped up his semen as best he could, then handed the used wipe back to Razielphustar. "I feel kinda different now," he said softly, still a little stunned from the experience. "But I can't really put my finger on how."

The squirreldemon took the young bat's cheek in his paws and turned his head to face him. "You've _changed_, Bartleby. You are one of us now. You are a part of everything. You are home, little one."

The boy didn't quite understand what that meant, but he thought he had some idea. The main difference, he realized, wasn't tangible at all. Somehow, he *did* feel at home.

Bartleby leaned closer to share a long, delicate kiss with his wise, wonderful demon friend.

When it ended, the little bat yawned quite loudly.

"Sorry to have bored you, sweet boy," Razielphustar kidded.

Bartleby giggled. "Sorry. I guess I'm still sleepy. And I always feel kinda tired after I cum."

The demon nodded and gave his back a serpentine stretch, producing a few pops. "As do I. Perhaps it is because, after an orgasm, the only thing that can compare is a dream?"

Bartleby nodded. That made sense.

Razielphustar carefully, carefully, carefully withdrew himself from the boy's bottom. He did his best to keep his cum from leaking out all over the place and causing a second mess. He managed to catch a good deal of it in another fresh wipe. Bartleby cooed at the pleasant sensations of being cleaned up back there.

Afterwards, the demon gracefully slithered out from beneath the blankets. He found his trousers again and slipped them back on. "I'll leave you to your own dreams then, Bartleby. Sleep well, my sweet prince. You have another exciting day ahead of you tomorrow."

The little bat grinned as he pulled his pajama bottom back up. "Yeah, I get to go back to school and see Xander and Lexi and Mrs. Schaddenfreude again, and probably meet a bunch more new friends too. And Xander's mom invited me over for dinner!"

"Are you to be the main course?" Razielphustar asked, as he helped tuck Bartleby in for the night.

The boy happily nodded. "Yeah! I can't wait. I'm sure she'll have some really cool recipe to try on me."

Razielphustar chuckled, happy to see that the boy was so looking forward to living his new life to the fullest. He leaned down to place a kiss on the little bat's forehead. "Goodnight then, Bartleby. Dream deeply and dream well."

"Goodnight, Razielphustar," Bartleby whispered.

The demon gave him a soft smile, then padded silently to the door.

Bartleby rolled over, tucking Terry back in his arms again, and got comfortable. He heard the sound of a doorknob turning.

		***

Suddenly, Razielphustar paused.

Something had just occurred to him. Something important. He smiled and turned around again. "Wait... There was one more thing..."

Bartleby rolled over. The squirreldemon was standing there, doorknob in hand, looking crafty. "Huh?"

The squirreldemon came over again and sat down upon the boy's bed. "I was supposed to deliver a message to you. From Lucifer himself. I'm so glad I didn't run off and forget about it," he said with obvious relief.

Bartleby sat up a little, curious now. "What is it?"

"He wants you to know he is extremely, explosively, *tremendously* proud of you for rescuing Llywyalla. I am too, since I haven't seen the dear girl in millennia."

Bartleby grinned. "Cool! So she did get in to see him!"

"Oh, yes! They talked for quite some time. And while they haven't come up with a cure for her curse just yet, Satan assured me he's got a battalion of Minor Imps looking through all the files on such matters, and he's sure they'll turn up something soon."

"Good! Then she won't have to say 'goodbye' every time she meets someone!"

Razielphustar laughed. "Indeed! It took me a while to figure out how to talk to her myself. But when I did, she asked me to tell you she is forever in your debt. You may ask any favors of her you wish until the end of time."

The little bat smiled. "Aw, that's okay. Tell her I don't like debts. If she wants to do me a favor, that's okay, but I don't want her to feel like she has to."

"I will tell her, sweet boy," Razielphustar assured, still overwhelmed by the boy's boundlessly giving spirit.

"And tell her I said get well soon," Bartleby added.

"I promise." He reached over to pat the boy's wing. "However, the devil has a message for you too."

"Hmm?"

"He said that, thanks to your courage, determination and most of all, your brilliant thinking, we now might have a chance to find out if other angels have been imprisoned elsewhere in Hell."

"Really?" Bartleby's sunny face turned suddenly to sadness as he imagined dozens and dozens of angels, all locked up and frightened and hungry like Llywyalla had been. "I hope he finds all of them!"

"He's already sent out a thousand and one demons to scour every last inch of the realm. If they are out there, we will find them," the demon said with ironclad certainty. "And don't worry, they've all been notified of the booby-trapped entrances. One of them told me he's going to drop a few anvils down each hatch first just to be safe."

Bartleby chuckled. "Good!"

Razielphustar leaned in closer and put his paw on the boy's shoulder. "But that is not all. There is also the matter of your reward," he said gravely.

Bartleby's tail wagged. "A reward? Cool! What do I get?" Though really, he thought, what more could he possibly want?

Razielphustar looked deeply into the boy's brown eyes. "In recognition of your heroic act of freeing Llywyalla from her heartless imprisonment, the Devil has offered to cleanse you of all sin, and promote you to the Really Quite Nice level. Effective immediately."

Bartleby grinned brightly.

But only for a second.

His heart suddenly sank and his smile disappeared.

If he left here, what about all his new friends?

He thought about Mrs. Schaddenfreude, with her exciting, playful punishments and her gentle, caring voice.

He thought about Xander. His friend's cute plump tummy. The notes they'd passed in class. How eager the fox had been to help Bartleby understand the world he now found himself in. The wonderful cuddling session they'd shared.

He thought about Lexi; how she could be a bit over-enthusiastic about gross stuff sometimes, but she was still a sunny, friendly, fun-to-be-with little hyena nonetheless.

He thought about Mr. Spitalka, and how long it might have taken for his and Xander's boybits to be bought from the nice skunk's deli case.

He thought about Mr. and Mrs. Oakley. How kindly they'd treated him, even though they'd just met him for the first time. Their offer to take care of him until he found someone in his family to live with. Their tender paws caressing him all over and making him feel yiffier than he ever had in his whole life up to that point.

He thought about the Summoner robot. Odd little fellow, but certainly amusing.

He thought about Roy, the squirrel chef, and how far he'd gone to make sure Bartleby enjoyed every second of being cooked for the first time.

He thought about Gillian. They had nothing in common, and she liked playing in dumpsters and trash bags, but she was so much fun to be with despite her different interests. And maybe even because of them.

He thought about Mrs. Mackenzie, the cheerful mink with the friendly voice and her big, stinky, exciting garbage truck.

He thought about Llywyalla. The way her wings had glowed so brightly as she'd spun around, tasting freedom for the first time in eons. How she'd cried at having to tell him she hated him in order to tell him she loved him. And that giant chocolate milk mustache!

He thought about Criss. That gorgeous body, those gentle eyes. Their long talk about life and death and accepting who they were inside. The indescribably wonderful taste of his big nummy cock!

He thought about Tasasha. She had seemed dark and spooky at first, but he knew she hid a good, kind heart underneath. And the little bats called her 'Auntie Tasha'...

He thought about the Devil. That wise, compassionate soul nestled inside that fearsome body. He remembered his tragic story, the loneliness in his eyes, and how proud he'd felt at getting him to laugh. And he wondered why exactly the King of Demons had been limping so badly.

And lastly, he thought about Razielphustar. The clown. The romantic. The listener. The gourmet. The counselor. The wiseman. The lover. The most interesting friend he'd ever had.

Bartleby sighed.

"No," he said firmly.

"No?" the squirreldemon asked, with the barest trace of a smile.

Bartleby nodded. "Tell him I really appreciate the offer, but I'd rather just stay here if that's okay."

Razielphustar grinned as if he'd never been more proud of the boy. "Why am I not in the least bit surprised?"

The little bat giggled. "There's just too much fun stuff here that I haven't explored yet!" he explained.

"And I'll bet there's just as many people here you'd hate to leave behind, hmm?" the demon added knowingly.

The little bat smiled. "Exactly."

Razielphustar stood up and patted the boy on the head one more time. "I will tell him. And I imagine he won't be all that surprised either. After all, the Naughty level is nearly as big as all the other ones put together. And the Really Quite Nice level's the second smallest."

Bartleby 'hmm'ed. That was interesting. "Why?"

The squirreldemon grinned cannily. "Because perfection is, by its very nature, boring. Souls need a little excitement and danger and fear every now and then. 'Tis the spice of life! A completely safe, secure and stable existence is barely worth living. Even the ability to control all of reality with a mere whim can become stale after a while if there's no one else there to share it with.

"Amazingly enough, ninety-nine percent of all souls who get promoted to the Really Quite Nice level eventually ask to come back down to Naughty. Imperfection is so much more fun. And everyone makes so many friends down here as well!"

Bartleby laughed. Put that way, it made perfect sense.

Razielphustar walked to the door and opened it again. He stepped halfway into the portal, then glanced back.

He gazed upon the little bat with all the affection in his heart.

"Paradise isn't a place, Bartleby," he said softly. "Paradise is being with people who love you."

Bartleby thought that was just about the wisest thing he'd ever heard. He smiled back at the handsome, caring demon in the doorway. "And people you love too?"

Razielphustar nodded. "Exactly." He blew the boy a kiss goodnight. "Sweet dreams, dear little bat. Sweet dreams."

"'Bye..."

"See you soon."

The door closed, and Bartleby laid there quietly for the longest time, smiling to himself. He knew, without any doubt, that he had made the right decision.


	*   *   *   *   *


-EPILOGUE-

Just as Bartleby was beginning to drift off to sleep again, he heard something moving underneath his bed.

"What was that?" he asked out loud.

Squishing, squooshing, squelching sounds emanated from underneath him, sounding like a gigantic booger being dragged across the floor.

Then two blue eyes popped up from beyond the edge of the bed.

As Bartleby watched, too sleepy now to really feel anything but mild curiosity, an immense, transparent purple slug came shuffling out from under his bed and stared at him with its comically-alien eyestalks.

"Hello, I am the monster under your bed. And I have come to eat you," it said in a pleasing baritone.

Bartleby yawned. "Oh. Okay."

The monster looked puzzled. "Well, for a new soul you're pretty jaded already, now aren't you?"

"Naw, jus' tired," the little bat mumbled. "Go ahead 'n eat me. I don' mind."

"Alright then, little fellow. Might be a bit oozy in there, but I hope you'll enjoy yourself nonetheless," the monster said affably as it slithered up onto the bed, leaving a trail of glistening slime behind him.

"Okay, whatever..." the tired young bat replied.

The big squishy monster started in on Bartleby's feet, gulping him down; pajamas, blankets and all. Bartleby was starting to drift off already, but he had to admit getting swallowed by a slug the size of a car felt rather nice.

Bartleby had nearly fallen asleep by the time the monster's big rubbery lips took in his head, and the pillow it was resting on too. He slid down into the creature's tummy and was soon coated in a thick, warm layer of digestive muck.

The monster smiled contentedly and licked his lips.

Bartleby tugged his blankets a little closer around him. He gave his small fox plush one last squeeze and nuzzled its ears. "Love you, Terry..."

A few moments later, he was out like a light.

Terry blinked.

The russet-furred plushie wiggled and stretched a bit, still not quite used to the whole concept of 'movement'. He looked up at his owner, sound asleep with a smile on his face, and was happy.

He thought about all the nights they'd spent together. Curled up in the boy's loving wings. Going with him on adventures. Faithfully keeping all his secrets. Taking fun trips in the washing machine.

He could have told Bartleby about coming to life earlier, but he thought the boy had already had enough surprises for one day.

He gave the snoozing bat a big hug with his short plushie arms. "Sweet dreams, Bartleby. I love you too..."

"Make sure to tell him in the morning that he was delicious," the monster gurgled, sounding quite satisfied indeed.

"I will!" Terry promised, and settled in to get digested along with his favorite boy.



	-THE END-

	for now...





		***

Author's endnote;
Almost exactly as long as "Ghost Story", a bit longer than "Down In The Dumps", quite a bit longer than "The Witch In The Woods" or "Sweetiepie", a few days shy of a month in the making, and some of the most fun I've ever had writing. Honestly, I used absolutely every single idea I've ever had for this thing, and a whole lot more I never anticipated.

Hope ya liked it. Again, if some of the God stuff made you a little uncomfortable, please keep in mind that it's not God I'm satirizing here, but the cruel, unforgiving, vengeful way some of his more demented followers choose to see him in. God's okay by me, but a lot of his groupies (especially the ones with TV shows) tend to give me the willies.

But hey, if it turned out that all of this stuff I just wrote is true, it *would* tend to explain some stuff...

Also, in case anyone noticed this... Mrs. Oakley says she can't ever get pregnant, but Tasasha asks Bartleby if she could lay some eggs inside him. What's the deal? Simply put, souls in hell cannot create life because they're not alive anymore. HOWEVER, that doesn't mean they can't *simulate* it. Tasasha's eggs hatch little pseudo-spiders. Animate, but no more alive than wind-up toys. They dissolve once she's done playing with them. Of course, if someone really, really, really wants to be pregnant, they can always ask another soul to go inside of them and be transformed. Or even make a request for an almost-pregnancy: A soul in the top two levels can ask for a recently-deceased new soul to be transported directly to their womb. Thusly, abortions on Earth get born in Hell to loving parents!

And, just in case you were wondering, Razielphustar's last name is pronounced 'Meh-FFROH-lo-vawn-TASS-ti-co'.

See ya next time!
Alex Reynard



"Bartleby's Descent"
Started: April 7th, 2005 Finished: May 5th, 2005 Editing Completed: May 15th, 2005


