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How hard would you run towards a better life?", "writing": "Rungirl\nby Alex Reynard\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\n\n\n\nPART ONE\n\n*~*~*~*\n\nTracy skittered to a stop in the driveway. Both cars were gone again.\n\nNot surprising. Why wouldn't they be? Why should today be any different?\n\nThe young chipmunk headed towards the side of the house, much slower than her blazing sprint from school. There wasn't an emergency, and she hadn't been chased; she just loved running. The three o' clock bell was her starting pistol. She tried to be the first one out the door every afternoon (which was a fun challenge since she sat back in the third row). Her sneakers carried her past the throngs of other students, down the front steps, and into the freedom of the open streets and sidewalks. Chipmunks are naturally lithe and swift, and Tracy had gotten excellent at dodging fellow pedestrians to keep time.\n\nHer house key was cleverly hidden inside the bracelet she always wore. It folded out like a little switchblade. Tracy let herself in, wiped her feet, and hopped up the foyer stairs to the kitchen. Opening the door, she called out, \"Dad? Mom?\"\n\nNo answer. Her voice seemed to echo in the spacious house.\n\n'Well at least the beasts aren't home,' she thought. Homework was bad enough without having to do it while juggling unpaid babysitting work. And this was Wednesday, so Candice wouldn't be by to clean until tomorrow. Tracy went to the fridge and checked the whiteboard. \"Oh right, they've got karate today.\" That still got a head-shake out of her. No one could convince her that three-year-olds needed martial arts training. Mom was over-scheduling those two so much it'd be a miracle if they didn't grow up traumatized.\n\nTracy opened the fridge and shivered pleasantly when the chill hit her fur. She grabbed the water pitcher and, with no one to stop her, drank right out of the spout. \"Mmmmm...\" Sheer coldness filled her mouth and coursed down her throat. It was actually pretty chilly outside, being November and all, but a good run heats a furson up. Tracy’s insides felt like a charcoal grill getting splashed down and rinsed out.\n\nShe'd spilled a few drops on the tile. Noticing, she rubbed them out with her sneaker. That left a scuff on the pristine tile. Annoyed and slightly panicked, she bent down to scrub with her finger. She could hear Mom's phantom voice scolding her. God forbid there actually be any messes for the maid to clean up when she got here.\n\nMindful of her sneaks, Tracy made her way around the kitchen's islands, past the dining room table and cabinets, across the Alaska-sized livingroom, up the grand mahogany staircase to her room on the second floor. The only good thing about a house this stupidly big was that she could always find a place for herself. Even when the twins were bawling and Mom was blasting her shows, there was always some little nook she could squeeze herself into for some privacy.\n\nShe flung her backpack across the room to the bed, scoring a direct hit on her pillow. She had homework tonight, but it could wait a few minutes while she stretched. Bracing against her desk, she leaned and bent and turned and pulled. Nice and slow. Tensing to her limit, then relaxing. Feeling the luscious, receding burn in her muscles. She loved that. Loved to just close her eyes and feel her flesh move beneath her fur.\n\nShe glanced at the mirror on the back of her closet door. In her current pose, her tail sat on her butt like a dollop of striped sour cream. She waved it at herself. Some chipmunks had long frizzy tails like a caterpillar. Hers was a puff. A blob. She grabbed at it and pulled, as if it might just come right off out of embarrassment.\n\nTracy walked over to the mirror and leaned in. She thought for a mortified moment there was something in her teeth (and how great to realize she'd been walking around all day like that), but it must've been a trick of the light. Her teeth looked fine. Even though her front bucks were still [i]way[/i] too big, as always. \"Beaver teeth,\" she said to herself. She poked them, like maybe they might recede in a little. She prodded her nose: too big as well. Too wide. Making a dissatisfied pout, she looked over her whole face. Definitely not feminine. Her eyes were allright, she supposed. Ditto her ears and fur-stripes. Her hair was okay, but she thought it looked better long than short. The only reason it wasn't was because it kept blowing into her mouth when she ran, making her gag and p'tooie. Sorry, hair, but Tracy would always choose running over anything else.\n\nShe put her hands on her hips and swiveled herself to and fro. At least she liked her outfit. Lemon yellow and emerald green were her favorite colors, and any day when she got to wear them both was a good day. The colors complimented her copper-and-cream fur quite well. She posed in her t-shirt and shorts, noting how loose they hung on her. Daddy said she'd grow into her awkward proportions soon enough. She wasn't sure whether she looked awkward or not. She liked her body more than her face. It was a runner's body. She moved her palms down along her taut tummy, slim sides and tight legs. She was built for speed, not grace. And if Mom didn't like that then... Then to heck with her.\n\nA fog of unconnected anger collected inside Tracy's head. She stared into her own eyes and didn't know why she was suddenly feeling so bitter. Nothing was different today than any other. But her cheeks were hot, and not from her run.\n\nShe decided to get her stupid homework done and out of the way. A power leap sailed her onto the bed. The springs creaked and the headboard bonked the wall, but there was no one in the house to tell her to keep it down. Tracy swam across her puffy comforter and waded through her stuffed animals to get to the backpack. She unzipped it, letting the books and papers and pencils come tumbling out in a heap. It was a lot simpler back in grade school. Back then it was just one teacher. Now in middle school, she had [b]six[/b] of them. And it seemed like none of them could be bothered to get stuff finished in class, so they had to make up for it by conscripting kids into doing most of the work after school. \"Mr. Cherroot wants chapter six of the biology book read and the three challenge questions answered. Mrs. Spang wants the social studies worksheet filled in.\" That'd be easy. You could just guess most of the time with multiple choice ones. \"What else...? Sixteen math problems for Mrs. Bloom, and then Mrs. Tabenaux wants that short story about the sled dog race summarized. Oh, and I have to explore the important themes the author wanted us to notice! Well poop, why didn't he just say 'em right out loud at the end then?\" Purely out of spite, Tracy gave a lightning-quick middle finger to her English textbook, then hid her hand in her lap as if her parents might materialize behind her and catch her in the act.\n\nTracy shuffled everything around on the bed, trying to get organized. But the more she tried to concentrate, the more her mind blanked. Four different subjects. Three a night was bad, but four was simply ridiculous. How did they expect anyone to keep up? She didn't even know what to start on.\n\nAs she was getting all her stuff ready, she came across her most recent spelling test. She uncrumpled the edges and held it up. Right up top in red ink was a B, circled. She was really proud of that. It was her best grade this year so far. She didn't even know how she'd pulled it off. Luck maybe, remembering eighteen out of twenty words right. But she was proud of it nonetheless. And it would have been really nice to show it off to Mom or Dad when they got home.\n\nBut Dad was at work. And Mom was out with the twins. So here she was alone in the house, like usual. Anymore these days, it felt like no one else lived here but her. Even when everyone was home and the place was noisy as hell, it still felt like that.\n\nOr like maybe this was [i]their [/i]home, and she was just some stranger who'd wandered in. Or a houseplant. Something voiceless to stand in the hall unobtrusively.\n\nTracy sat up straight, sinking into the poofy mattress. She stared at the wall above her bed, not seeing her posters. Not seeing anything. Feeling something painfully, but not able to identify it. Her mouth was hanging open a little.\n\nOn pure impulse, she hopped off the bed, grabbed her mp3 player, and headed for the door.\n\nHalfway down the stairs she realized she'd never taken her shoes off. So maybe some part of her knew this was coming.\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\n\nTracy put her music on loud and ran. She had paused exactly long enough to make sure the door was locked behind her, then she was gone. She didn't want to come home tonight to find the place had gotten burgled because she'd been distracted. Although part of her didn't even care about that. It was [i]their[/i] house. What did it matter to her?\n\nHer hindpaws rebounded off the sidewalk in rhythm with the bass in her earphones. Sharp, relentless synths. A screamed female vocal. A machine beat; precise and impossible to disobey. When Tracy had her music on, she molded herself to each song. Her body was water, flowing into whatever beat passed through her. She was very selective about her songs. While some kids spent hours every night blabbing online, she spent her time crafting playlists. All songs were methodically handpicked to fit a certain mood. Some of these lists were Aquamarine, Velvet, Thunder, Sunlight, Moonlight and Jade. Today's was Hypnosis. That was for when she wanted to utterly blank her mind. Lots of remixes and EDM. Songs that were seven minutes, or nine, or longer. Songs to get lost inside of. Songs to stop existing to.\n\nThe November chill was powerless against Tracy's speed. Her heart pumped hot blood through every part of her and she never felt the cold. Some days she'd go without a jacket and not even realize the temperature until she could see her own breath misting in front of her. Sometimes in the summer she'd be feeling fine one second, then be dizzy and puking from heat exhaustion the next. She liked winter better. Autumn the best. A good chill kept her temperature regulated just perfect, and gave her incentive to keep moving.\n\nAll the big houses on her tree-lined street blurred into a background smear of colonial white and burgundy red. This wasn't [u]the[/u] richest part of town, but it was definitely close. As a little girl, Tracy would see houses like hers in movies and not think anything of it. It was only a few years ago that it dawned on her how lucky she really was. Her running had taken her to ever-widening circles around the city, and sometimes to not-so-nice places. There were a few streets she had gone down and come straight back from, with no plans to ever return. She didn't tell her parents about the places she went to. It was part of why they let her run at all. They thought she was just running laps around their nice, safe neighborhood.\n\nThey'd have been astonished (probably horrified) to know she'd actually made it to the department store where they bought her clothes. And back! That first time, she'd needed to collapse in one of the fitting rooms and pant for about half an hour before she could head back home. But each time since, she'd needed a little less rest. Sometimes on her routes she'd reward herself with a little snack at some fast food place. Sometimes she challenged herself to find a restaurant she'd never been to before. Sometimes she intentionally got herself lost, just to see if she could find her way again. Of course, the easy way out of that was just to turn around and retrace her route. But that was only for when she'd really screwed up and gone down some dead end by mistake. It was much more satisfying to keep going through some mystifying unknown territory and suddenly emerge on a main road she knew well. Tracy had gotten smart about shortcuts too. She knew all every one in town, but wouldn't go down a new one unless she'd been on both sides and knew there wouldn't be a wall or a fence in the way. (Even then, some barriers were worth taking a moment to climb over if the shortcut was just that good.)\n\nPast the tediously-familiar streets of her own neighborhood, there were the freeway houses to the south, the shopping district to the north, the sort-of-woods to the east, and suburbs-land to the west. Tracy had chosen east without thinking, and was already two songs in before she realized where she'd headed. She gave her instincts an approving nod before submerging back into the beat. East only had the one road that went down it, but it was plenty wide enough to share with the few cars that passed by. There were houses every now and then, sometimes with funny mailboxes (like the duck one), and immense backyards. That's why she thought of it as the woods. Her city was right under the shadow of the state capitol, so it was too urban for actual wilderness. But there were enough trees down this path to feel a bit like it. Right now the autumn colors were brilliant, and in wintertime the snow made everything look like pure magic.\n\nPlus, the further east you went, the fewer traffic lights you had to deal with. Traffic lights were the bane of Tracy's existence. There was nothing worse than having a song build up to an excruciating pitch, then you had to stop at the light just when the beat dropped. [i]Arrrrrgh.[/i] She'd jog in place but it wasn't the same. She sometimes wondered if the drivers waiting to cross saw her and thought she was having a tantrum. She wondered if any of them recognized her. 'There goes that girl who runs everywhere.' Maybe they did. No one had ever given any indication though. Her city was big enough that she only ever recognized a few people here and there on her jaunts. The old mountain lion who was always on his porch. The hedgehog and his son at the gas station. The cashier cat with the dreadlocks downtown. Everyone else was just a blur of Pred and Prey.\n\nTracy had been taught all her life not to talk to strangers. The PSAs and books and school presentations all made it seem like everyone she ever met was out to get her. From real-life experience, Tracy had observed that 99% of furs just went about their own business not giving a dump about anyone else. So maybe [i]she[/i] wasn't anything to anyone else. Just a green, yellow and brown blur that streaked past sometimes.\n\nThe rhythm in her ears erased everything else between them. Tracy was running. Nothing else. 'Running' was the sum total of her identity at that moment, and that was fantastic. She barely observed the houses she flew past. The uncollected newspapers in the bushes. The packages left on porches by indifferent delivery drivers. The toys in the yard. Even the duck mailbox. Her eyes saw, but her mind assigned no importance. When she was in this state, she was instantly alert to any tripping hazards or too-close cars, but nothing else registered on visual scans.\n\nAlthough, once the traffic lights and houses were behind her, she did notice the old roads. There were a handful of them out this far. Out where, when she was running without her music, the only sounds were wind and birdsong. These roads cut through the woodsy parts. No sidewalks, not even any curbs. Tracy was often in the mood to go somewhere she'd never explored before. Today especially so.\n\nSo at the next road she came to, she turned right. Whatever was down here, today she'd add it to her mental map.\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\n\nIt had only been a few moments ago when she'd started getting bored and scared at the same time, and was thinking it might be good to turn around and head home. There was nothing but trees down this route. Tall, thin ones that grew alongside the road like a foreboding fence. It was so silent here that she had to keep turning her music down. Her normal volume was meant to compete with traffic (but not too much; it was a matter of safety to always hear her surroundings), but in this place it felt like the music was just thinly covering emptiness. Nature was supposed to be refreshing and cheerful. Instead, the trees here were bare, dry and ugly. This was not an enchanted glen where nonev squirrels and birds would frolic about with Snow White. This was the scant bit of nature the city planners would begrudgingly allow. Not enough room for most animals. But there might be homeless guys camping out deep back in the brush. 'Not that poor people are bad,' she reprimanded herself. Just that, well, she really didn't know what she'd do if some haggard-looking drunk came stumbling out in front of her, asking for money. She tapped her pockets. Apparently she'd left her wallet at home with her backpack without realizing it.\n\nThere was a point where she was internally debating whether to write this path off as a dead end. For all she knew, it could be nothing but trees, trees, trees for the next seventy miles. She might run all night and never come to anything else. Even though it was only a little past four, it already felt late in the evening.\n\nThat might have decided things if not for her current song ending just then. There were five seconds of silence between it and the next, and in that brief gap Tracy heard a sound like running water, or static. As the next electro-dance number started thumping in her earbuds, she recognized it as the rumblehum of the freeway.\n\n'Huh. I didn't realize it looped around all the way back here.' But freeways meant off-ramps, and thus main roads running parallel. Maybe she didn't have to go back after all. Maybe forging ahead just a little further would reveal a path that'd take her all the way around in a circle. Good. She hated doubling back almost more than running the same route twice in two days.\n\nAnd her reasoning paid off. By the end of the next song, she knew exactly where she was. She'd come to the prize at the bottom of her spur-of-the-moment choice.\n\nTracy had run far enough north to come up on the old shopping mall from behind. She'd passed it a dozen times in the car. Even ran past it a few. It had been closed since before her family moved here. She'd never seen its butt-end before. How fascinating.\n\nThis road must have been for truckers to bring in supplies, she reasoned. The trees to her left abruptly cut away into a yellowed field, which became a vast, crumbling parking lot. The dividers were skewed and the rain had eroded off their yellow paint. Weeds grew everywhere. The concrete had cracked into big sections that looked like icebergs. If she'd been on a bike, this lot would've bounced her right off her handlebars. As it was, she kept to the edge anyway. Lots of things to trip on here. Even after being vacant so long, there was still garbage and chip bags and pop cans laying around.\n\nThe back of the mall had four huge receiving bays. Red sliding doors as big as the side of her house. Tracy could hear the freeway drivers' drone above her music now. From their vantage point, the mall still showed off its storefronts. Flashy architecture; gold and mulberry letters in fancy fonts. Plus the towering sign at the corner listing all the anchor stores. Tracy could just barely see its arched tip beyond the roof. Back here though, it was all boxy and dank. Like a Hollywood set you could see behind to all the boring parts. The dumpsters were gone, but as she got closer she could see the rusted footprints where they'd stood. There were still some wooden pallets lying around though, looking severely rained on.\n\nTracy had slowed out of step with her music without realizing it. Her nose and tail twitched as she scanned all the details of this derelict retail behemoth. This place might as well have had a big sign up saying, '[b]You're not supposed to be here[/b]'. And, since she was a kid, that drew her in like a magnet.\n\nNot much could pull her away from running. Rarer still was something that deserved turning off her music for. But Tracy thought this place earned the honor. She unplugged her ears, wrapped the cord around her player and pocketed it. Her eyes remained glued open as she slowly approached. Out here, her soles scuffing against concrete was loud enough she swore she could hear it echo.\n\nTracy traced her finger along the back wall of the loading bay. Lots of graffiti here. LOTS of graffiti. Mostly names, usually unreadable. One or two were done with some skill and color. There was a badly-drawn skull, and a swastika, and a dick. \"Bo-ring.\" Though someone had drawn a bat with googly eyes and jelly wings. That was creative enough to get a nod of approval.\n\nShe stopped at the edge of the pit where the trucks pulled in. A huge sunken wedge, like the tapered bottom of a swimming pool. She trembled a bit. If she slipped down there, she'd end up in a huge, slick pile of dead leaves and trash. That would not be good. She continued on, determined to at least explore the full perimeter. She glanced occasionally at the ground. Maybe she'd find some dropped change. Or not. Maybe she'd just have a nice cooldown intermission before restarting her run. Now that she knew where she was, it would be a snap to take Chambers west and shortcut down Lewis right to her backyard.\n\nTracy actually did find a penny. Then she found a way in.\n\nShe stopped, realizing the implications of the askew board immediately. This was an employee entrance into one of the big clothing stores. Payne's, it still said above on the awning. The glass had been smashed out and someone had boarded it up. But the boards had been thoroughly graffiti'd, and one of them had been pried sideways. Maybe by looters, maybe teenagers. Tracy felt her tail frizz up as she stared at the little gap. The November breeze pricked at her neck.\n\nThe mall had been closed for years. If this hadn't been fixed by now, then for sure no one was keeping watch over the place anymore. And this entrance was far enough away from the roadside that no one passing by was likely to spot it. Tracy's heart quickened.\n\n'There could be people in there.' The teenagers who'd spraypainted everything. Or maybe a whole colony of homeless folks. Or maybe just a hell of a lot of spiders.\n\nTensing herself to run like a fired bullet if there was [u]any[/u] response, she leaned down and yelled, \"HELLOOOOO!!!\" into the hole.\n\nNo response. None. Silence, except for the background mumble of the freeway cars.\n\n\"I shouldn't do this,\" Tracy told herself. \"It's stupid.\"\n\nBut she knew even as she was saying the words that they wouldn't stop her. They were token acknowledgment of what her parents would have said if they were there. But they weren't. 'And I'm fast enough to outrun anything bad in here, I'm sure of it,' Tracy reassured herself.\n\nFor a slim young chipmunk, it was no trouble at all to squirm past the hole in the boards.\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\n\nFor a moment, her eyes saw nothing but dull, dusty shapes. She stopped and let her pupils refocus.\n\nThis was a slim passage to the back stockroom of the store. Tracy threaded her way through it, wishing she had a flashlight. Once inside, she marveled at the towering emptiness of the place. At one point there must have been big shelves full of coats and dresses, and now there was only scuffs on the floor. Everything was [u]gone[/u]. She kicked a beer can and heard it echo. Squinting, she could tell that this was the place trespassers usually kept to. In the corner was an oil drum, and judging by the extensive smoke damage up the walls and ceiling, people had used it as a makeshift furnace. She wrinkled her nose at the smell of fire, cigarette butts, spilled drinks, and maybe even a little vomit. But these smells were dry. If they'd been fresh she might've turned tail and run. But it seemed whoever had been here had stopped coming long ago.\n\nA faint change in the dimness led Tracy towards Payne's proper. Here was an even bigger empty space. And since so many of the walls were angled glass, she could see a bit better. Up ahead was almost as bright as day: the mall's roof had skylights.\n\nThis had once been a clothing store. Now it was an art gallery. Tracy walked slowly past pillars that mannequins had posed on, neck craned to appreciate the graffiti murals that reached all the way to the ceiling. The scrawlings outside had been primitive; rushed by the fear of being spotted and caught. In here the artists could take their time. Here was a four-foot tall bewildered-looking cartoon skull. Here was a snake wrapping around an oil derrick. Here was a kaleidoscope array of hearts. Here was a lion hunk curling his arms romantically around a twiggy mousefemme. Tracy stopped, blushed, and stared at that one for a while. The big pred was all muscly, with a mane as big as the sun. The mouse looked blissfully helpless, nearly disappearing in the fur blanket of his embrace. Tracy's hands kneaded at the hem of her shorts.\n\n'Okay. Never mind. Can't spend all day in here. Gotta explore the rest.' She hustled herself past the stimulating painting towards the front of the store. Wasn't difficult. This place had been cleaned [i]out[/i]. No more clothing racks, shelves, registers, or even any stray safety pins. Looking up she could see that the ceiling tiles had even been pried loose. Slashed ends of wires were hanging down. She remembered a news story once about metal thieves. Furs who sold it for scrap. This mall must've been a goldmine for them.\n\nFor a moment Tracy worried that the rest of the mall might be inaccessible. What if the front of the store was all locked up? But that was definitely not a problem. Like a lot of mall businesses, Payne's had a sliding metal gate for protection at closing time. Or rather, it [u]had[/u] had. Tracy could see it'd been ripped right off its hinges. 'Thanks, scrappers,' she thought as she stepped through. In the store's display window, way in the far corner, she could see a single dusty mannequin foot.\n\nFinally she was in the mall's main concourse. She stopped and gawked silently. The ceiling was twenty feet above her: a glass spiderweb that let in light and showed off the underside of pigeon poops. Tracy was on the bottom of two floors. To her right was a mountainous escalator next to an oasis of benches and toppled plant pots. To her left was a completely gutted toy store. She could only tell its former contents by the clowns-and-balloons carpet pattern. Above her, the second floor was a balcony ring, with a glass barrier all the way around to keep people from plummeting off. Lots of little stores up there, but she couldn't see them clearly. She'd need to go onwards and upwards for that.\n\nShe had never been in a place this big all by herself before. The escalators and walkways should have been full of people. Their lack of presence made her feel even tinier.\n\nTracy realized her paws were trembling.\n\n'Okay, I need to stop that. I'm eleven. I'm not a baby.' She filled her lungs and bellowed, \"ANYONE IN HERE!?\"\n\nShe froze and listened for a response, tensed to bolt.\n\nNo one yelled back, 'Get out of here' or 'This is our place.' The only reply she got was her own echo.\n\n\"See? It's abandoned,\" she told herself. And then, the realization, \"Which means... it's all mine.\"\n\nTracy's expression of wary fear slowly melted into a smile of triumph.\n\nThe entire mall was hers. A gigantic birthday present for her to unwrap.\n\nA giddy giggle escaped her lips as she dashed off. Not back to the exit passage, but forward, deeper. The expedition had begun.\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\n\nOnce upon a time, the Heaven Plaza Mall had been crammed to the rafters with clothes, jewelry, music, books, movies, stuffed toys, and other consumer goodies. Now its most abundant resource was empty space. That was just fine by Tracy. After years of being told, 'Don't run indoors!', here was a place where she could disobey that rule to her heart's content. Her sneakers made squeaky toots across the smooth white floors. Miles and miles of tile. She could run laps in here, she realized. Come up here in the deep wintertime and zip back and forth from end to end all day.\n\nAfter a quick skim before the full exploration, she'd determined that the mall's outline roughly corresponded to a three-leaf clover. Sort of. Each leaf had long stems connecting them to the central stalk. Since she'd entered from the back, she'd come in at the top leaf, the biggest one. The bottom stalk was the main entrance, where the food court and some of the fancier jewelry shops were (not that there was any food or jewelry left in them). Long corridors branched off from the middle, where a once-spectacular fountain had now become an oversized concrete bathtub with busted PVC pipe sticking out. There were ministores and tipped pushcarts all along the side stems, leading to two huge rival department stores as the third and second leaves. From where Tracy had entered, Payne's was at the top of a double-decker cylinder of stores. Only the center leaf had top and bottom sections.\n\nDefinitely not much left to scavenge anymore. This place had been picked clean. Sometimes even counters and doors had been hauled away. The biggest salvage she spotted was a computer monitor lying on its side in an electronics store. She guessed it was so bulky and out-of-date that nobody had a use for it. Aside from that, the only other items to stumble across were litter. Empty spraypaint cans and crumpled cigarette packs.\n\nThe skylights let in plenty of sunshine. Though Tracy knew her time here wasn't unlimited. It'd be getting dark in half an hour or so, and with no electricity in this place, she knew she'd be up a creek trying to find her way out again.\n\nEven that worry couldn't dim her exuberance. She really was deliciously all by herself in here. She could screech and holler all she wanted as she blazed along the aisles. It was fun to roam around the deserted stores and guess at what they'd sold. That one could've had shoes or books. The warm brown colors just had that 'look' to it. Here was an ice cream parlor: she could tell by the display islands with gaping holes to hold the tubs. Similarly, a bulk candy store with the bins all emptied. The jewelry stores had nice carpets completely littered with broken glass from hooligans smashing the cases. Conversely, most of the wall and ceiling glass was intact. Tracy saw lots of cracks from people throwing stuff, but rarely had they succeeded against the strong stuff. Looking up, she even saw tiny dents in the skylights, and corresponding chunks of brick far beneath.\n\nAnother way to guess what stores had sold was by the names. Sometimes signs had been pried off, but most were still there. Some were explicit: Far East Healing Spa, Daystone Realty. Many were more poetic: Metropolitan Man, Jumbles, Periscope!, Up 8th Avenue. She guessed the artsy ones were mostly clothing stores. Tracy herself didn't own a lot of clothes, unlike some of her classmates who seemed obsessed with them. Tracy cared about colors, but so long as her outfits allowed mobility, she wasn't picky. She burst out laughing at one of the signs. Vandals had scraped away letters, turning Funktown Boutique into Fuk But.\n\nAfter thoroughly surveying all four arms of the ground floor, Tracy decided to head on up to the second. She got a nasty fright though. After looking around for escalators, she spotted them and made a beeline. But a smashed-in whale-shaped kiddie ride distracted her, and she nearly ran headlong into a hole. The escalator steps had been pried up, revealing a dark canyon underneath. Standing at the edge, Tracy stared down and panted for a moment. She was very glad there were stairs right beside.\n\nUp above, the second level was entirely balcony. No floor in the middle, so shoppers could peer down at everything below. Tracy could see the same variety of emptied-out shops lining the perimeter of the loop. Definitely an arcade over there: a humongous open space with square imprints in the floor and lots of outlets. A wig store with goofy faces painted on the remaining plastic heads. The tattoo & furbrushing place still had a poster of designs plastered to the window. Tracy wondered what she'd look like with some little gold stars and moons decorating her stripes.\n\nOne of the things she'd failed to appreciate when she'd first entered was that the mall must have shut down shortly after December. On the bottom floor, stretching all the way up past the observation railings of the upper level, was a massive artificial Christmas tree. Standing at the edge of the walkway connecting the left and right sides of the balcony, Tracy gawked in awe at it. The tip nearly touched the skylights! She wondered why no one had taken it away. Maybe it was too big to bother with. She looked down and could see the base of the trunk, where big shiny fake presents had undoubtedly been clustered around. There was a little shack that probably held Santa's chair. Plus an indentation went all around the area, which she thought might have been the tracks of a little train. How fun!\n\nTracy was completely delighted by all this and wished she could have seen this big tree at the height of its brilliance. It was probably festooned with silver tinsel and colored lights and beautiful ornaments-\n\nShe stopped and stared. Deep in the branches, up near the top, one lone ornament was left. One golden ball.\n\n'Oh that'd be so cool to take home!' she thought. 'All the others got picked off, but I bet that one was too high up for anyone to get.' She blanched as the nonev part of her suddenly yearned to go climbing up those branches. She was a modern chipmunk! She'd break her neck! Who knew how stable this old tree was? It wasn't even a real tree. It might collapse at any second. Besides, she'd have to go all the way back downstairs and start at the trunk.\n\n'Or maybe not.'\n\nA dangerous idea had occurred to her. The tree was not far from the railing. More than arms' length, true, but certainly no further than five feet.\n\nShe could jump five feet. Sure. She'd done it in gym class.\n\n'No! That's suicide!' she admonished herself. She clutched the rail and looked past the glass barrier, all the way down to the lower floor. 'I'd break my legs. Or my skull. And besides, I'd have to jump over this thing first. It's up to my chest. I could never...'\n\nHer arguments died out because, as she glanced to the left, there was a bench right in the center of the walkway.\n\nHer brain saw it step-by-step: A running start towards the bench. One hop onto it. Another to the railing. Then a leap to the tree and grab on tight.\n\nHer pulse was pounding in her ears. 'No. NononononononononoNO.'\n\nBut she was gonna. Oh, it was just too tempting. She knew damn well her athletic little rodent body could accomplish it. And no grownups were around to stop her. It was just a matter of convincing her brain to let her.\n\nShe shook her head and walked away, back towards the elevator. This was nonsense. This was crazy.\n\nOnce she'd gotten sixty feet, she realized it was the perfect distance for that running start she needed. She turned around. The path was clear. Nothing in her way. A perfect straight shot from the bench to the railing to the tree. And she'd even get a prize to show for it.\n\n'How am I gonna get down afterwards?'\n\nInstead of answering, she decided to let her future self figure that out.\n\nTracy pulled oxygen into her lungs and leaned forward into her first lunging step. She felt her rational, cautious self shout warnings, but her speed soon left them behind. She blanked her thoughts. The sure way to fail any physical challenge was to overthink it, she knew. 'Just blank your mind, trust your body, and do it.' Her sneakers hugged against the tile with each step. Her heartbeat pounded in her ears. She rounded the angle from the concourse to the walkway, keeping her eyes focused on the tree.\n\nFirst jump. Her body left the ground and her rubber sole gripped the cast iron rungs of the bench's seat.\n\nSecond jump. More of a straight-up hop really. The railing was cylindrical, but the round edge actually helped her pivot for the correct angle.\n\nIn that instant, her whole body extended over the edge. Suspended over disaster, held only by friction. Her leg pistoned back against the rail, launching herself forward. Third jump.\n\nFor one microsecond, she was flying. Nothing but air above and below her. No thoughts or fear in her mind.\n\nThen suddenly she was hugging branches like her life depended on it, which it absolutely did.\n\nHer breathing was a loud, jittery flutter. Her adrenaline-laced blood raced through her veins. She didn't dare open her eyes yet. Her fingers dug into metal-reinforced plastic. Fake needles scratched her face.\n\nWhen she finally dared to look, all she could see was green.\n\n'I did it.'\n\n'I actually...'\n\n'OHMYGODIACTUALLYDIDITI'MINACHRISTMASTREE!!!!'\n\nTracy let out a shriek of mixed terror and triumph. She allowed herself to unclench, and realized the branches were a lot sturdier than she'd expected. Some, at least. Most were whippy and fluffy, to look like a real evergreen, but some were like ladder rungs. It was lucky she hadn't impaled herself on one of those. She looked upwards. For a few moments she couldn't see her goal, and hoped her impact hadn't knocked it loose. It'd be the saddest thing in the world to look down and see the little gold ball smashed on the floor below.\n\n'Nope, there it is!' She kept her eyes on the little metallic flash, and only had to climb two more ladder-branches to reach it. It felt amazing to wrap her paw around the smooth plastic. It was actually cool to the touch, and bigger than she'd expected. Softball-sized. For a moment she worried it wouldn't fit in her pocket. But she got a firm grip on the branch above and wiggled her hip to shove it in.\n\n\"Now I just have to get down.\"\n\nBlessedly, that too turned out to be easy. She mostly kept her eyes closed and descended by feel. She didn't want to look down and get dizzy, plus the softer branches kept smacking her in the face anyway. The ladder-branches were arranged in a crisscross pattern, so she ended up climbing down in a clockwise circle, like going down the outside of a spiral staircase. After a few tense minutes she reached out her foot for the next step and felt nothing but empty air. An instant's panic. When she craned her neck and dared to look, she was three feet from the ground. She sighed a giggle of relief. When she dropped down, she very nearly kissed the floor like people in cartoons. The thought of germs stopped that idea. Though she did stay hunched over with her palms touching the tile for almost a minute. Just reassuring herself she was back on gravity's good side. She'd done it. The impossibly crazy idea she'd had a few moments ago was already over and she'd won. Her slowly-steadying breaths were mixed with gasped, disbelieving laughter.\n\nFinally she stood up. She hugged herself tight. 'That was nuts, but you did it. And it felt INCREDIBLE!' She patted the bulge in her back pocket and grinned effervescently.\n\nShe also realized that, after such a heart-pounder of a moment, she needed a relief-pee. Looking around, there was actually a restroom in sight.\n\nShe trotted towards it, and realized halfway there that this place wouldn't have running water. And the toilets were probably ripped out of the floor anyway. On the other hand, the sunlight was beginning to fade and it was the last thing she hadn't checked out, so why not?\n\nStill high as a kite, Tracy hardly noticed the picked-corkless bulletin board that had once held lost dog notices and job offers. There were grimy squares on the tile where pop machines had stood, near a phone kiosk with the receiver yanked out. Tracy turned the corner at the Ladies side, and before she'd even gotten a look at the room itself her nose was wrinkling. Seemed someone had been using the facilities here whether they were functional or not. Tracy held her nose and peeked. Bleah. Pink tile, doorless stalls, more graffiti, and stains she did NOT want to identify.\n\nShe turned to bolt, but happened to notice the Gentleman's sign on the other side. Smell or no smell, she had to check this out. Boys' urinals were fascinating things. And she felt certain this side would be stinkier than the girls'.\n\nThough when she took a sniff, it wasn't pee she detected. It was that same fire smell from the oil drum in the Payne's stockroom. 'Maybe someone had a bonfire and sacrificed the toilets,' she thought with a chuckle.\n\nWhen she entered the room, she froze and a shiver clawed its way up her back. The floor was sunken in towards the center here, as if someone from hell had stretched it down. There was gray ash covering everything. And there were rocks and sticks in a big pile in the middle except... Except oh jesus they weren't rocks and sticks they were bones. Tracy's eyes widened in horror. Bones. Femurs and pelvises and a hundred tiny phalanges. And skulls. Little skulls. These had been children. There were dozens of them here.\n\nTracy lost the ability to breathe. Her throat glued shut. Her heart pumped pure icewater. For a moment she was 100% paralyzed.\n\nThen instinct tore control away and she backed out of there as quick as lightning. She heard a bursting crunch and something stung her buttcheek. A high-pitched scream leapt out of her. Then she was running.\n\nTearing around the corner away from the room of bones. The sacrificial pit. She ran past the Christmas tree. She ran past the display case with the lonely mannequin foot. She ran past the graffiti art. She ran past the smoky stockroom. She aimed herself like a bullet towards the bright patch of light beyond the pried board. Outside. Safety. She lunged and squirmed through without hardly breaking stride.\n\nThen fresh air was in her lungs and the November wind curled around her body, shocking her back to consciousness. She had been on total autopilot for a moment there. Zero conscious thought, just the instinctive programming to get away from the bad place. The unsafe place. The killing place.\n\nBut she was out now. Not stopping. Running across the parking lot. Free. She wouldn't even take Chambers and Lewis home, because that would mean turning back and going past the mall. She didn't ever want to see the mall again. She would close her eyes when Daddy drove past it from now on. She would backtrace her route through the woods and go to bed the instant she got home and never come back this way again NEVER EVER EVER.\n\n\"Hey! Little girl! Stop! Are you allright?\"\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\n\nTracy pivoted like she'd been shot.\n\nBreathless, her vision swam with dizziness for a moment. There was a man running after her. She stiffened to run again.\n\nBut then she noticed his pressed blue uniform. The flashlight he was holding. His cap with a gold badge. A security guard. A fox, or maybe a wolf? Hard to tell with his soot-black fur. Though there was nothing but gentle concern in his expression.\n\nThen she was running towards him, gasping to speak. When she plowed into him, the guard stumbled back several steps, using his tail to keep balance. Her arms were around his waist as tight as she'd held the Christmas tree branches.\n\n\"Hey! Whoa! Calm down. Were you poking around in there and had a fright?\"\n\nShe looked up into his kind face, not caring for an instant that he was Pred. His starchy, soft uniform meant he was a good grownup. Someone she could tell. She tried to force words past her thrumming heartbeat, but all she could get out was, \"Murder! Murder! Murder!\"\n\nThe fox guard's eyebrows went up. \"That's pretty serious. How about we go sit down on that bench over there, you can catch your breath, and we'll figure out if you saw something real or just got spooked by shadows, okay?\"\n\nFor a moment she was irritated that he didn't believe her. But of course it made sense. What was more likely, a kid getting scared in a scary place? Or actual, real, bloody awful murders happening in a safe, cozy town like theirs?\n\nTracy didn't remember seeing a bench before, but the fox guided her with a paw on her shoulder to one just at the edge of the parking lot. Green-painted wood, next to a bus stop sign.\n\n\"You sure are lucky, Little Miss Chipmunk. I come out here once a month to make sure nobody's burned down the place. I was just about to leave when you came running out. Fast as lightning!\"\n\nHearing that actually did calm her down a bit. It was just about the nicest compliment she could receive. She nodded gratitude to him.\n\nThe fox guard eased down onto the bench and patted the seat beside him. \"Here. Tell me everything.\"\n\nTracy nodded again, bent to sit down, and jolted away in pain.\n\n\"What happened!?\" the fox asked.\n\nWincing, Tracy reached around to her pocket. That bang when she'd fled from the restroom. She'd backed into the wall so hard, her ornament had shattered.\n\nShe pulled out a pawful of curved gold shards, and started crying.\n\n\"Oh,\" the fox said, ears drooping.\n\n\"I'm s-sorry. I guess I shoplifted it.\" She looked up at him, wondering if he'd have to arrest her now.\n\nInstead, he gave her a smile that said he didn't mind at all. \"I'm just amazed you found anything left in there worth taking. It's fine. You're not in trouble.\"\n\nShe nodded. She looked down at the pieces of her smashed souvenir. No way to repair it. It'd be a cracked-up mess even if she did glue it all together. She turned her paw over and let the pieces tinkle to the sidewalk.\n\nThen she slumped onto the bench and slid herself against the guardsman's side. He put his arm around her, and she cried some more.\n\nShe knew it was selfish and awful of her to be caring about her ornament at a time like this. There were skulls in that bathroom. A whole pile of them. Dead kids. What did a stupid plastic ball matter compared to that?\n\nExcept... it was hers. She won it.\n\nA black-furred paw rubbed gently up and down her shoulder. \"Tell me what happened.\"\n\nSo Tracy did.\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\n\nIt didn't take long. The young chipmunk stuck to the facts. She kept her voice calm, even though it trembled at places. She was relieved the guard had no interest in punishing her for trespassing. He only cared about the bones, and that she'd gotten out safely. It also helped that he was fascinating to look at. Definitely a fox from the shape of his face, but his fur was almost totally black except for some orange blazes around his ears and tail. His eyes were orange too; a color strong as Halloween pumpkins. While Tracy talked, she picked the remaining bits of pointy plastic out of her pocket. She decided not to tell the nice security guard where she'd gotten the ornament from. As if he'd believe her anyway.\n\n\"...and then I just ran. I didn't even think about it. I ran as fast as I could. I- I admit, at first I thought I was gonna run home and hide under the covers and not tell anyone. Just, not even think about it ever again.\" She looked up from her position lying against his side, to see if he'd be ashamed of her.\n\nHe wasn't. \"That's normal,\" he said gently. Everything about him was gentle. And his voice was smooth and sweet as peanut butter. \"After a traumatic incident, denial's pretty common. Some things are deeply uncomfortable to think about, and difficult to face. You're showing more bravery right now than you realize, Tracy.\"\n\n\"Oh.\" Her cheeks flushed. She liked how it sounded when he said her name. \"Thank you.\" Shyly she looked away. Across the empty parking lot to the hole in the boards. She shivered. \"What's going to happen now?\"\n\n\"Well, I'm not a real cop,\" he admitted, pointing out the logo of Lock Solid Security embroidered on his sleeve. \"But I know a few. I'll take a drive down to the station and tell them what you told me. You don't have to come along unless you want to. You can be an anonymous tipster.\"\n\nTracy felt both relieved and disappointed. \"Really?\"\n\n\"It's up to you,\" he said. \"Depends on whether or not you want to take credit for breaking the case- which you deserve to,\" he patted her paw, \"-or if you'd really rather just forget this. You can go home and no one will ever know you were here. My lips are sealed.\" He made a zipper motion across his muzzle.\n\nShe giggled lightly, then sighed. She sat up straight and he took his arm away. She let him know with a glance she was grateful for the hug. Tracy stretched her legs, then her arms, then she looked far down the truck road with the tall trees on either side. \"I'm not sure what I want.\"\n\nHe glanced at the bus stop sign. \"That's okay. We can stay here until you decide. I'm not even sure the buses stop here anymore. No reason to.\"\n\nWith the mall closed, that made sense. Tracy leaned forward, folding her arms and resting them across her lap. Making herself smaller against the chilly breeze. \"Part of me wants to go with you. I feel like I ought to tell the cops and take them back here and point out the bones myself. Like, to make sure they see them? Maybe even to make sure [u]I[/u] saw them. You know in movies when the main guy sees a thing, and when he tells people about it they go back and it's not really there? What if it was just some shadows? What if they were, I dunno, Halloween props?\"\n\nHe shrugged. \"That's possible. Though if they were, no one would be upset at you for reporting it. Much better to check and be sure. And wouldn't that be the best outcome? Wouldn't it be better if no one had died and it was just a silly Halloween prank?\"\n\n\"That's a good point,\" she nodded. \"I'm not sure why anyone would do that though. Maybe some high schoolers doing a scene for a play? Or some fake ritual to scare themselves with?\"\n\n\"Plausible. You're a very smart young lady.\"\n\nTracy smiled bashfully at that. \"...Thank you.\" She realized she was grinning and quickly hid her buckteeth away, embarrassed by their hugeness. She looked back down the road again. Home was only an hour's run away. Nothing, really. \"On the other hand, I'm glad you said I could just leave. I'm good at running away -I mean, good at running.\" That slip made her cheeks red. She wondered if she'd just said something more true about herself than she was comfortable with facing.\n\nA soft, soothing paw on her shoulder. \"It's not running away. Are you a police officer? A homicide detective? Or are you still in grade school?\"\n\n\"Middle school,\" she corrected.\n\nHe held up his hands apologetically. \"My mistake. Point is, you don't need to worry yourself over this. You made the discovery, you told someone, and that's your obligation finished. You've already done a good job. I'm proud of you.\"\n\nShe squirmed a little, pleased to an inexplicable degree to hear him say that. She rubbed her legs. Her shins were getting a little frosty out here. Shorts were only good in November if you kept yourself moving. \"Maybe I will then. If it's okay? Honestly, I think it's more that I don't want my mom and dad to know where I was today! They'd throw a fit. They'd faint!\"\n\nThe fox chuckled. \"I have seen enough over-worried parents to not argue with you on that. If that's your choice, then go on home. Nobody has to know. The authorities will handle this.\"\n\n\"Okay.\" Tracy nodded and readied herself to get up. Her tush was a bit sore from the hard bench anyway. \"Though...\" She settled back down as something else occurred to her. \"I do want to know what ends up happening. Like, if they find out who those kids were? And if their parents get told?\"\n\n\"That shows compassion,\" the fox guard said approvingly. \"I'll see if I can pop you a letter about it sometime. Or probably it'll be on the news tomorrow. Maybe even tonight.\"\n\n\"Oh right!\" That should have been obvious. A big story like this? A buncha bones turn up in an abandoned shopping mall? Probably sat there undiscovered for years? The news wouldn't shut up about it for months. Years maybe. Tracy could watch it at the dinner table and pretend to be as shocked as everyone else.\n\n\"Allright. So you've decided?\"\n\n\"Mm-hmm.\" Though Tracy didn't say it, part of her wanted even more to stay on this bench, talking to this nice security guard. He was really good at consoling frightened little chipmunks.\n\nHe could see it in her eyes and her smile anyway. \"Okay. Go on then. Run home safe. Somewhere out there, there's a child killer on the loose.\"\n\nTracy had turned and grabbed the armrest to stand up, but then she froze as solid as cold marble.\n\nSomething about the way he'd said that. Something wrong. And suddenly she knew. She knew totally and completely.\n\nPieces began filling in. How coincidental was it that he just happened to pick today to do his inspection? He said he'd drive her to the police station, yet the parking lot was empty. And the way he'd said those last few words to her. Meant to sound like a warning, but was there a hint of a tease in there? The ghost of a laugh at having fooled her? Having sat right next to her, talking sweet, while the whole time he'd known the instant he'd seen her running what she'd been afraid of?\n\nIt was nearly impossible to move. Time crawled like a nightmare.\n\nTracy turned her head to look at him, expecting to see a slasher smile. Expecting those orange eyes to be glowing, filled with a cruelly playful glint that would tell her, 'You found my secret. Now you have to join the others in the bone pile.'\n\nExcept...\n\nThat wasn't what she saw on his face. Her fear ebbed somewhat, replaced by confusion. The fox's expression was bashful, sheepish. His posture on the bench had not changed. There was no menace in his body language. Everything about him said, 'Aw gosh darn it. Ya caught me.'\n\nHer blood had turned so cold she no longer noticed the November frost. Wide-eyed, all she could say was, \"You...?\"\n\nHe was inclined at the other end of the bench with one arm across the back, the other lying in his lap. He didn't make a move. The wind rustled his sleeve, that was all. \"Yes,\" he said simply.\n\nShe shuddered. What Tracy was feeling at that moment, far more than anger and almost as much as fear, was heartbreak. The very idea that this kind, gentle, soft-voiced fox had done such evil things. Had tricked her. Had [i]lied[/i] to her. She didn't want it to be possible.\n\nThe moment made them both into statues. Tracy knew she was motionless from fright, but didn't understand why he wasn't moving either. Killers were supposed to pounce on their prey. That was how it happened in horror films. But as Tracy kept her eyes locked on his, he didn't even seem to blink.\n\nWorse still, his expression didn't change either. His eyes still showed no hatred towards her. No hunger. They were perfectly placid. Almost... concerned? Was that possible? Could he be lying even now? Could anyone fake such sincerity?\n\nSummoning all her inner strength, Tracy forced her throat to unclench. She tried to speak boldly, but fear made her voice waver anyway. \"I don't believe you.\"\n\nThe slightest tilt of his ears. \"About what part?\" he asked.\n\nTracy had her paw on the armrest and clenched it tight. \"A-about you being the killer. You can't be. You just can't.\"\n\nHis gaze radiated apology. \"I am. Sorry.\"\n\nTracy's jaw trembled. Something throbbed at the back of her head. She began to wonder if she was actually trapped in a bad dream. Her eyes darted up and down, scanning the fox's every detail. It did not add up. Something had to be a lie here. It simply was not possible that he could be a bloodthirsty killer of children, yet also be sitting here calmly, seemingly as harmless as a stuffed toy.\n\nSuddenly she realized that he might be playing a game with her. Like a cat with a mouse. He was waiting for something from her. Testing her.\n\nWell, allright.\n\nThere was something she was very good at. She'd even said so a moment ago. And she'd never in her life had a better reason to. The question had finally entered her mind: 'Why aren't I running?'\n\nHe still had not moved. His left arm was still draped across the back of the bench. His right was still at rest on his lap. His posture was relaxed. If she popped up into a sprint, maybe she could get away before he could nab her. Even better: she could feint! Make like she was about to run towards the trees, but actually grab hold of the bench and turn herself around towards the mall. Get to the main road where people could see her. She'd read about that in a Stranger Danger book.\n\nAllright, that was the plan. She just had to keep looking afraid (which she was) and not give away that she was tensing her muscles to spring.\n\nShe stared at him. He looked back at her.\n\nThe wind blew dry leaves past their feet. The freeway hummed.\n\nKeeping her face perfectly still, Tracy drew in a deep breath. Slowly, slowly, slowly. She cemented her grip on the bench. The metal was cold as ice. Almost ready. It didn't look like he had a gun, but if he did she could zig-zag. Almost ready. And...\n\nTracy exploded into motion! Her muscles launched her up onto her feet, taking a running step towards the fox, then yanking on the bench as hard as her young muscles would allow to spin herself in the opposite direction. Any second now he'd pounce and-\n\nShe glanced back. He hadn't moved an inch. Not even a twitch.\n\nHe was still sitting on the bench in the exact same position. Even looking up at her without surprise. His expression asked, 'Did you think I'd chase you?'\n\nTracy stopped. She stood looking back over her shoulder at him.\n\nEverything about him said that if she continued running, he would let her go.\n\nThe young chipmunk stared at the fox for several more moments. Neither of them said a word. And then, not understanding why, Tracy sat back down on the bench.\n\nThe fox showed no reaction, positive or negative, to this decision.\n\nShe bunched herself into the corner, knees tight together and arms wrapped around her middle. The cold was starting to sink into her skin. She couldn't take the tension anymore. She couldn't take not knowing. So even though it was the stupidest question possible, even though she knew there was no good answer, even though a tear fell from her eye as she opened her mouth, she couldn't stop herself from asking, \"Are you going to kill me?\"\n\nThe fox looked back at her with nothing but compassion. When he replied, it was a slow, careful whisper. \"That depends. Do you [i]want[/i] me to?\"\n\nShe almost had to laugh at such a crazy question. \"Of course not!\"\n\n\"Okay then,\" he replied.\n\nAnd as much as that baffled her, she thought that maybe she understood his motionlessness. Maybe he actually was trying to show he meant her no harm. Maybe he really would allow her escape.\n\nLightning quick, she feinted as if she was about to start running again.\n\nHis only reaction was to keep looking at her with those gentle, concerned eyes.\n\nTracy slumped against the green wooden slats. More tears gathered, blurring her vision. \"I don't know what's going on. I don't know what to do.\"\n\nA very slight nod of understanding. \"Tracy?\"\n\n\"Huh?\"\n\n\"Do you mind if I move my arm? It's starting to fall asleep.\"\n\nShe was bewildered all over again. \"No, I don't mind.\"\n\n\"Thanks.\" He watched her carefully as he took his arm off the bench and curled it into his lap beside the other. She flinched a little. But she didn't run away in panic. \"If you want to ask me anything, I'll answer truthfully.\"\n\nShe blinked, splashing her tears down her cheeks. \"Why should I believe you?\"\n\nA small shrug. \"That's up to you.\"\n\nShe drew her legs up to her chest, wrapping her arms around them and curling herself into a tight ball. She rubbed her paws briskly up and down her shins to warm them. \"Did you really kill someone?\"\n\nA slow nod. \"Yes. Several someones. Everything you saw in the bathroom was real.\"\n\n\"So why... Why aren't you trying to shut me up right now? Jump on me? Pull out a knife and cut me?\"\n\nHe looked confused. \"Should I?\"\n\nShe shook her head angrily. \"You say you're a killer but you're not [i]acting[/i] like a killer! It doesn't make any sense to me! You're acting all... nice!\"\n\nHe smiled. \"Well thank you.\"\n\nTracy growled. \"You're confusing me!!\" she exploded.\n\nHis ears folded back. \"I am sorry about that. I really don't mean to upset you. I thought I could fool you with the security guard routine. I thought I'd convinced you you'd already done your part, and you could go home and things were handled. You could go off happy, and my secret would stay hidden, and things would work out for both of us.\"\n\nTracy wiped a paw across her eyes. \"And I ruined that by figuring it out.\"\n\n\"Hey, don't feel bad about that. Don't be sorry for being smart. I got overconfident. I got clumsy at the end, that's my fault.\"\n\n\"But you...\" She sniffled. \"You're acting like you'll still let me go. But you can't now, right? I know the secret.\"\n\nHe tilted his head. \"Is there any reason I [i]shouldn't[/i] let you go if you want to? You already said you wouldn't tell. I trust you.\"\n\nThat stung for some reason. Hearing something so kind, from someone she was supposed to be fearing and fleeing, caused so much confusion it was tearing her up.\n\nThe fox chewed his lip, wanting to give her a hug to console her, but knowing she needed him to keep his distance.\n\n\"Why wouldn't you just kill me and get it over with like all the rest?\" she sobbed.\n\nAh. Now that was a good question. A trace of a hopeful smile came to his muzzle. \"Because you're afraid. I don't like for cubs to be afraid. In fact, none of my victims have ever died unless it was their wish to.\"\n\nShe became alert at that. Wiping her eyes again, she fixed her gaze on him, hunting for any trace of a lie. \"That doesn't make sense. Why would they let you kill them?\" A possibility occurred. \"Were they, like, cancer kids? Are you a suicide doctor?\"\n\n\"Actually, one of them was. And I sort of am. But the real answer's much more complicated and...\" he turned his eyes away, \"rather selfish.\"\n\nTracy was intrigued. He sounded more ashamed of that than the actual confession of killing.\n\nThe fox looked back at her. His hands were now clasped together nervously. \"Tell you what. You know part of my secret. If you want, I'll share all of it. But first, I want to know about you too.\"\n\nShe recoiled a bit, squishing herself even tighter into the corner of the bench. \"Me!? Why?\"\n\nHis throat quivered slightly as he answered. \"Because when I first saw you, I thought you might be right to know the full truth. You might fit. But I want to be sure. I don't want to simply trust my feelings. You don't have to tell me any more than you're comfortable with. I just want to know [u]you[/u]. What kind of furson you are. And if you don't want to share anything personal, it's also perfectly okay if you get up and walk away and never come back here. I just ask, if you do go, [u]please[/u] don't come back here.\"\n\nBy now there were so many questions swarming around Tracy's head she felt like she was drowning. Of course her danger alarms were going off. Of course this could easily be a trap. Maybe to blackmail her. He could be lying about ALL of this. But...\n\nHe really did look sad. And concerned. And sincere.\n\nAnd Tracy knew she could run. She could run at any time if she felt scared.\n\nAnd... maybe she had been wanting someone to talk to for a long time now anyway.\n\nShe set her lip and grunted, somewhat irritated with herself for giving in. She was probably being gullible and stupid. She was probably going to get caught and murdered. But some part of her was starting to get the feeling that she'd stumbled onto something unimaginable. Something that was once-in-a-lifetime, whether good or bad. Maybe it was worth dipping further into. Just a little.\n\n\"My name is Tracy,\" she said, and winced like always before giving the rest, \"...Vanderbrooke. I know it sounds like a snooty rich-kid last name. It kind of is. Some of our other relatives have big, big houses with ivy on the walls. We're... doing allright,\" she mumbled, embarrassed.\n\n\"That doesn't sound so bad.\"\n\n\"It's not,\" she admitted. \"It's just...\" She wasn't sure why she was willing to open up like this. To a killer. An evil ghoul. But maybe that was exactly why. If he was gonna slice her up anyway, what would it matter? \"We have a nice house. I like living there. We have a maid. No pets; they're too messy. Dad works a lot. Mom is like... She likes being a housewife more than anyone else in the world. She wants everything to be perfect. I've got a brother and a sister. They're three, and twins, and Mom shows them off to everyone. We get along I guess. It almost feels like-\" She shut down the thought that was about to follow and backed away. That was too raw to admit, even if she was at death's door.\n\nThe fox leaned forward a little. \"You're talking about a lot of stuff that's not you. What are [i]you[/i] like? What do you enjoy?\"\n\n\"I like running,\" she said without hesitation. \"It feels like it's all I'm good at. I like my music, and I like watching TV on my laptop, and onion rings, even though Mom says they stink up the house. I have a lot of stuffed animals. And I like the color green. And yellow. They're best when they're together.\"\n\n\"I see you're wearing both today,\" he said approvingly.\n\nShe unclenched her legs and stretched out, so they could both see her sunny yellow top and emerald shorts. \"Thank you. I'm kinda too cold right now, but then, I thought I was going to stay running the whole time I was out today. Kinda stupid.\"\n\n\"No, no. You couldn't have anticipated all this.\"\n\nShe narrowed her eyes. \"I guess?\" she said bitterly. \"I'm not good at anything in school, so I can't be all that smart. I'm useless at math. I get bored trying to read. If I get Cs, I'm happy. And I've got this big dumb clown nose I wish I could get rid of.\" She rubbed her paw over it as if she could erase it. \"And these big dumb teeth like a license plate sticking out. I look like a [u]boy[i].[/i][/u] I even dress like a boy. Maybe I am one. I'm sure not enough of a girl for Mom.\"\n\nThe fox looked rather startled. He didn't know how to respond to that.\n\nTracy crossed her arms and leaned forward onto them. The killer beside her no longer mattered. She'd been bottling this up for far too long. \"She likes everything perfect. And I'm not. Things used to be better. Then, I don't know when it happened but, it was like I stopped being their daughter. I was just someone who lived there that they pretended to like. I didn't turn out right. I'm not a cute ballerina princess, or a super-smart science girl. I'm just... I run. That's about it. And when the twins came along,\" she sniffed in contempt, \"that was it for me. I got demoted to babysitter. I live in the house but I don't feel like they want me there anymore, except when I can do things for them. When I can change diapers or smile for photos or go along with all the weird 'projects' Mom picks up and then dumps a week later.\"\n\nHer muzzle was smashed down deep in her folded arms. Her next words were nearly inaudible. \"I'm not good enough for her. I'm a project she's sick of and I won't go away.\"\n\nAfter that there was silence for a while. Or at least no more words. The cars on the freeway still rumbled by. The autumn leaves still scratched and skittered as the wind swept them along across the concrete.\n\n\"Tracy...\"\n\nThe young chipmunk looked up. For a second there, she'd actually forgotten she wasn't alone. She'd forgotten the mall and the bones and the Christmas tree. For an instant she was terrified again. Then she saw his eyes.\n\nHe looked like it was killing him to not pull her into a hug and console her.\n\n\"It sounds like you're a very unhappy girl,\" he said.\n\n\"I guess?\" she admitted quietly. \"I shouldn't be, though? Like, I'm way better off than a lot of other kids. I have food and a warm house. My parents don't hit me with belts or make me work in a coal mine. I'm fine. Really, everything's okay.\"\n\n\"Do you feel loved?\" he asked.\n\nTracy knew she couldn't answer that question.\n\nThe fox nodded.\n\nTracy flinched a little when he suddenly stood up and took a few steps past her. She hadn't forgotten he was dangerous.\n\nThe fox's tailtip flicked back and forth rapidly. He stretched his legs, then rubbed the back of his neck. Without turning around, he addressed her. \"Tracy, you did what I asked. That was much more than I expected. Thank you, sincerely, for showing trust in me. I know it's not fair of me to ask for any more, but if you would like to know more about me, it would be easier to show you.\"\n\nGoosebumps prickled all along her arms and legs. \"What do you mean?\"\n\nHe turned, and on his face it showed that he knew exactly how bad this sounded. \"Would you follow me back inside the mall?\"\n\nHer heart stopped. Her nerves froze. Her eyes went wide as baseballs. She stared at him.\n\nAs before, he did not move. He let her decide. He was positioned such that, if she wanted to take off right there and then, he would simply walk back to the mall without her and vanish.\n\nTracy felt as if there were jackhammers in her stomach. The mall. He wanted to take her back into that place with the pit full of ash and skeletons. Where the bodies were burned. Burned alive? She didn't know. But it was probably what would happen to her regardless. Just another skull for some other stupid kid to find years down the line. Absolutely not. She wanted to tell him no. Wanted to kick his legs out from under him and run like a rocket back home.\n\nShe was standing up.\n\nHer cheeks flushed and her jaw trembled. How did she get here? Why wasn't she running away? Was she out of her mind?\n\n\"You can follow if you choose to,\" the fox said softly. He headed back across the parking lot towards the hole in the boards.\n\nTracy turned to watch him. 'No, Tracy, no. You're not going to follow him. Stop. Stop this. Don't be stupid. He's going to trick you and hurt you. He's going to KILL you. Stop!' She was crying again. 'Stop being a wimp and just GO.'\n\nTracy started walking after the fox in the security guard outfit.\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\nThe little chipmunk hustled across the parking lot. She watched the murderous stranger lift the loose board aside. She watched his blue pant leg and his orange tailtip disappear through. A moment later, she was standing in front of the hole too.\n\nShe stared at it. Like the hole of a guillotine. And she'd have to stick her head through just like one. Her blood was rushing, pounding, drumming in her ears. She was shaking all over. She felt like she couldn't get enough breath. She had never been more scared, and half of that was at herself. Why was she doing this? Why was her body disobeying her and following after this... this evil creepy killer guy? Even if he hadn't OUTRIGHT ADMITTED to being A MURDERER, there was still the basic fact that she was a skinny little chipmunk girl and he was a strong, grownup adult fox. Nothing about this equation ended well for her. Tracy watched her hand reaching for the board.\n\nShe made herself stop. She stood there shivering from head to toe, and the cold had nothing to do with it. She could barely see from the tears flooding down her cheeks. She knew, absolutely knew, that he was waiting there behind that hole. Waiting with an axe. The moment she put her head through, the blade would come down and sever her neck. Her dumb head would go rolling away in a shower of blood. [b]SLICE!!! [/b]Just like that. Her life would be over.\n\nShe was trembling and crying and terrified, but she could not stop herself. Could not. She crouched down, and at least looked through the hole first to check. She didn't see anyone lurking there. Didn't see the axe glinting. \"Hello?\"\n\nNo response. Same as the first time.\n\nTracy took in a long, slow, deep breath, and squeezed herself through the opening, into the darkness.\n\nA moment later she was standing up. Eyes closed, but neck still intact.\n\nShe opened her eyes. Since they hadn't shifted suddenly from sunlight to dark, she could see a lot clearer this time. Same thin entryway. Same gutted-out stockroom beyond.\n\n\"Hello? Mr. Security Guard?\" She realized she didn't have anything else to call him.\n\nShe had not actually expected a response to her timid whisper. \"I'm down here at the front of the store.\"\n\nTracy nodded and ran to meet him.\n\nPast the oil drum, past the mannequin stands, past the art and the empty store. He was waiting by the torn-off gate just like he'd said. Standing straight, hands in his pockets. The sun was setting outside, so not as much light made it through the ceiling. Still, it was enough to silhouette him against the entrance.\n\n\"I'm glad to see you came,\" he said earnestly.\n\nSlightly breathless, Tracy blurted, \"I don't know why I followed you and I'm scared and this is dumb and just show me what you're gonna show me and get it over with PLEASE!\"\n\nHe chuckled lightly. \"Alright.\" He took his hand out of his pocket and held it up, showing it was empty. His face was in shadow, but she could still see his soft, handsome smile. \"You've shown unimaginable trust in me, Tracy, and I hate to keep having to ask for more. But just this one last thing and you'll see. I have to touch you for it to work.\"\n\nHer tail frizzed up. Suddenly she realized that maybe it wasn't death she should be afraid of. Maybe he was going to rape her. Hold her down and pull her clothes off. Her cheeks flushed hot.\n\nHe backed up a few steps. \"Not in any kind of dirty way!\" he reassured. \"It can be any kind of touch. On your shoulder, or your paw. You choose.\"\n\nShe looked at his paw. Fuzzy dark fur like a teddy bear. But also precise, curved claws. \"Why?\"\n\nHe shrugged and shook his head. \"I have to transfer a bit of the illusion away. So you can see what I see.\"\n\nNot a word of that made sense. But Tracy was ashamed of herself to admit she didn't mind. Maybe it was just fine as an excuse to say yes to his paw touching her. Was she that starved for contact?\n\nShivering, she said, \"Okay.\"\n\nHe nodded, and motioned for her to take a few steps forward with him. He held out his hand for her to hold.\n\nShe looked at it. The leather pads. The way the fur of his paw was slightly darker than where it transitioned at his wrist. She had touched him before and it felt nice. She'd hugged him. He'd patted her shoulder. But that was before she knew he was a murderer. Would it still feel as good?\n\nHesitantly, like she was about to grab a cactus leaf or barbed wire, she placed her small paw into his.\n\nThe warmth as he closed his fingers around hers sent shockwaves through her.\n\n\"There we go. That's all,\" he said, sounding happily relieved. \"Now take a look.\"\n\nTracy unclenched her eyes and peeked at his hand.\n\n\"No, silly,\" he said with a gentle chuckle. \"At the mall.\"\n\n\"Huh?\" She turned her head and nearly fainted.\n\nHer paws shot to her mouth to cover a gasp of astonishment. She was unprepared for this. Nothing in her entire life could have prepared her for this. She gaped in complete paralytic shock.\n\nIt was snowing.\n\nSnowing indoors. Big fluffy flakes were dancing down from the ceiling, materializing from thin air. The whole lower level was covered in a thin blanket of fuzzy whiteness, and it wasn't cold at all. On the contrary. Tracy felt a rush of warmth hug itself around her like someone had just lit a fireplace nearby. The giant escalator was now decorated with yards and yards of tinsel and balloons. Drawings were taped to the sides all up and down. At the base was a small mountain of colorful plastic kayaks. The plant pots were upright again, filled with miniature palm trees, and beside them was a little cabana and a cooler and snacks. On the other side, the toy store was trumpeting color and light. The shelves were stocked to the rafters. Plushies, dolls, RC cars. As Tracy looked further up the aisle, she could see that [i]every[/i] store was full now. And not just with merchandise. Some of them had been wildly repurposed. There was a ball pit. A ping-pong room. A television room with beanbags. A humongous hoard of sports equipment. And looking up, the second floor balcony was festooned with climbing nets and more decorations. Colors almost blinding. Tracy could hear arcade machines up there. She could smell fresh-baked pretzels.\n\nAnd the [i]TREE![/i] Her breath caught in her throat when she finally focused on it. It looked twice as big now that it was fully decked out. Ribbons, lights, candy canes. Innumerable ornaments of every style. Some weren't even ornaments. She saw gold watches and necklaces, cell phone covers, game controllers and toys, candy and hats and mittens. Anything that would stick in the branches. Beneath this evergreen behemoth, the little train was chuffing along on its miniature tracks. There was a glossy plastic engine like an oversized wind-up, and two cars for kids to ride in. Once it passed, Tracy could see Santa's chair and a humongous pile of presents. Real presents, not just giftwrapped props.\n\nIt was impossible. Miraculous. Unbelievable. Tracy could not stop crying today, but now it was from sheer awe.\n\nThe fox stood behind her, just enjoying her reaction. His smile was wide and warm. He kept his arms crossed behind him, biding his time until she could find a voice again.\n\nAfter several minutes of gasping and gawking, Tracy finally spun around and screamed, \"HOW!?\"\n\nHe winced at her volume, then giggled. \"I can understand your excitement! I hope, even if this doesn't explain everything, at least it illustrates why you had to trust me for several of the steps. Could I have possibly told you about this without you calling me a lunatic and a liar?\"\n\n\"I guess not!\" She glanced back at Payne's and now it was a dance hall. The graffiti was still there, but the floor had been completely cleared off to make room for lovely hardwood. There was a massive sound system in the corner, with amps as big as refrigerators. Mannequins dressed in ridiculous fashions were positioned all along the perimeter like they were dancing with partners. Tracy even spotted a pile of rollerskates in the corner.\n\nSuddenly it was too much. She had to sit down. And since there was no chair nearby, she fell backwards.\n\nThe fox guard swiveled in a flash and caught her. \"Yikes! Are you allright?\"\n\nTracy blushed scarlet. One of his arms braced her shoulders, but the other was kinda touching her butt. And she kinda liked it. And she was kinda super-turbo-embarrassed about that. \"S-sorry! I just got overwhelmed!\" She wiggled out of his arms (not actually wanting to) and braced herself against the glass of the display window. She could still see the lights of the Christmas tree in its reflection. That by itself was almost too much, but not looking directly at the impossibilities was helping. \"Okay. Please. How? Tell me. I see it but it can't be there. None of it. It makes my brains go scrambled just looking at it.\"\n\nHe looked proud of his handiwork. \"I work in illusions. Mostly. I can do some other things, but primarily I make people see or not see things. The loose board was an example. I felt you coming by to investigate, and I knew you weren't one of those rock-throwing types, so I let you see the gap. Normally it would look closed off.\"\n\n\"How!?\" she growled. \"This is magic stuff! This isn't supposed to happen!\"\n\nHe cocked his head. \"Maybe you've just never encountered it before. Maybe people like me keep it a secret.\"\n\nTracy wearily shook her head. \"This is just making me have more questions.\"\n\n\"I understand,\" he said with sympathy.\n\nIn the reflection of the glass, she saw his hand extended. When she turned, he was asking with his eyes if she would follow him.\n\nShe was still afraid. She had not forgotten the bodies. But her fear was growing dimmer. This couldn't all be bad. No one who could speak so softly to her, and make such a beautiful tree, could be all bad. Tracy reached out and put her paw in his. She felt better the instant his fur touched hers.\n\nHe started walking and she followed. She stiffened a little when she realized he was leading her towards the restrooms. She was not entirely surprised. And then an awful thought occurred to her. \"I think I get it. You show kids this wonderful amusement park circus show, and that's how you lure them in. You take them into the bathroom...\" she looked down at her paw in his, \"like you're doing with me... and that's where you kill them.\"\n\nHe glanced back and admitted, \"That's... half correct.\"\n\nHer goosebumps multiplied. Her fur stood up like she'd been hooked to a generator. But she didn't let go. Because she recognized this as real magic now. And maybe it was worth it to see real magic even for just an instant. Even if he made her kneel before an altar and cut her throat with a ritual knife. She was terrified, but also exhilarated. Because this was a fairy tale, and she was in it. And sometimes little kids got the bad ending in fairy tales. But wasn't it worth it just to be part of the story?\n\nTracy followed the fox past the mound of presents and Santa's peppermint-colored throne. Her sneakers left prints in the snow. As she passed beneath the tree she craned her neck to look up, all the way up, through the dizzying cone of branches. Pure amazement. Like a colony of fireflies were living inside. She squeezed the fox's hand in gratitude for letting her see this.\n\nAnd past the tree, the illusion continued. More stores had been transformed. One was totally emptied out so trampolines could be nailed to every surface, ceiling included. One was a stuffed storeroom of clothes. One had a big pile of toilets and some nearby sledgehammers for smashin'. And the spa was back in business as well. Tracy saw shampooing chairs and an aqua-massage table and possibly a mudpit in the far back.\n\nThen they were at the restrooms, and Tracy accepted that her time was short. Though when the fox turned towards the Gentleman's room, Tracy let go of him just long enough to check one extra thing out. She dashed to the Ladies' side and looked around the corner. \"Wow!\" The pink tile was gleaming so clean you could eat off it. The stalls all had doors again. There were bowls of potpourri, and candles, and even a [i]miniature waterfall.[/i] Tracy honestly wished she could have had the chance to pee in here before dying.\n\nBut... No sense prolonging it. She skipped back to where the fox was holding out his hand to her again. This time she took it without hesitation, and smiled at him.\n\nHe stepped around the corner into the room. Tracy steeled herself, closed her eyes, and did as well.\n\nShe waited for the axe. Or the dagger. Or some other implement.\n\nNone came.\n\nWhen she peeked one eye open, the fox was looking down at her, patiently waiting to explain.\n\nShe looked around the room. Unlike everything else, it had stayed exactly the same. The floor was sunken in and black with ash. There were no stalls or toilets. Only the pile of bones. It was not a towering mountain, but it was not small either. Tracy would not have been able to count the dead. This room was dark and entirely grey. It even seemed to suck the color out of her fur and clothes. She did not like being here. Yet she was not exactly afraid either. By now she was certain: there was some purpose here she didn't understand yet.\n\n\"Look at that far wall, Tracy,\" the fox pointed, \"and tell me what you see.\"\n\nWas that where the altar and the axe would be? Tracy obeyed and looked, and felt her stomach turn over. She was looking, but not [i]seeing[/i] anything. It was just... [b]black[/b] back there. Like smoky fog. Like someone had coated the whole wall in so many layers of black paint there wasn't even a wall anymore. Maybe it was a trick of the light? Maybe the room extended back further than it seemed, and it was too dark to make anything out?\n\nBefore she could reply, he said, \"There's nothing wrong with your eyes. And it's not an optical illusion. At least, not one you'd have seen before. That... is me.\"\n\nShe stared at him, plainly baffled.\n\nHe gave her paw an affectionate squeeze. \"You see, I'm an illusion too.\"\n\nShe looked down at the paw holding hers. It sure felt real. She reached up and brushed her fingers through his cheekfur. That felt real too.\n\nHe smiled as if she'd just given him an invaluable gift. \"I know. But I'm very good at my tricks. And right now, I'm not standing here, holding your pretty paw. I'm back there, in that darkness, covered up. Because you're not ready to see me yet. Not today. But maybe later, if you choose.\"\n\n\"Are you an alien?\" she asked, figuring that was as good a guess as any.\n\n\"I'm an angel,\" he replied bashfully.\n\nShe furrowed her eyebrows. \"An angel? Like with wings?\"\n\n\"Seems unlikely, doesn't it? But it's what I am. Or was. Angels aren't meant to be on Earth. It seems to have an... effect on us.\" He laughed dryly. \"I say 'us', but it's just me honestly. I'm in hiding. I'm kind of a coward.\"\n\nTracy looked back to the inky shadow in the back of the deathroom. She kneaded her fingers across his. \"I don't mind if you're an illusion. You're handsome.\"\n\nA genuine smile. \"Why thank you. But my real self is, ah, less handsome.\"\n\nShe looked sad at that. \"It can't be [i]that[/i] bad.\"\n\nHe shook his head. \"It is. This is not something you have to try to make me feel better about. I've been here a few millennia. I accept what I am. So trust me once more: I can see in your eyes that you think you can handle it. But you've had enough shocks for one day. No arguments. We'll save it for another time. If you want to.\"\n\nShe thought maybe she [i]was[/i] ready, but didn't want to argue. \"Allright.\" She looked down at the dusty grey bones. \"So... you kill kids like me to take their energy, right? Or their souls? To keep you alive here?\"\n\nHe looked genuinely impressed. \"That is [i]startlingly[/i] close.\"\n\nShe nodded. \"I do watch sci-fi shows sometimes. If you say it's hard on angels to be here, then maybe you're like a vampire who has to drink blood to stay alive? But with souls. I guessed that part because it just seemed more likely than blood.\"\n\nHe noticed she was still holding his hand. \"The idea doesn't scare you?\"\n\nTracy looked at one of the skulls, and thought, 'that might be me soon.' \"Not really,\" she said, trying to sound nonchalant. \"You've been really nice to me, and I think you're a good furson, angel or not, so if you have to feed on me to stay alive... I can be okay with that.\"\n\nHe placed his other hand on top of hers. \"That is incredibly generous of you. But, happy surprise, not really necessary.\"\n\nShe perked up, then visibly shivered in relief. \"It isn't?\"\n\nA smirk. \"I did ask if you wanted to die today, and you said 'of course not'.\"\n\n\"Oh,\" she remembered. She was surprised to find herself feeling... weirdly disappointed. It would have been tremendously exciting and romantic to be slurped up to sate a real angel's hunger. (A part of her protested that she had no proof he WAS a real angel. But she countered that anything that could make such cool illusions was close enough to suit her.)\n\nHe laughed, recognizing exactly her emotion. She'd well and truly proven to him by now that she was a wonderful choice. A miracle that she'd come here by herself, by accident. (And he had firsthand knowledge that miracles didn't happen anymore.) \"If you really, really wanted to donate yourself to me this instant, I'd be grateful. It's just, I already have plenty of sustenance right now. More than enough. You see,\" he gestured towards the bones, \"it wasn't the end for these young furs when they died.\"\n\nTracy inhaled sharply, her eyes widening.\n\nGuiding her paw, he led her away from the deathroom and back towards the mall. \"Tracy, I would like you to meet my family.\"\n\nShe was glad to emerge from the grey, sooty room. But even though she was doubly glad to see the tree again, she looked and she didn't see anything else. Just her shoeprints in the snow. No little ghost kids flying about. Though holy heck, that idea was cute! Was that what was going to happen to her? A little wispy transparent chipmunk who could fly? Or maybe she'd look like a bedsheet with eyeholes.\n\nThe fox's smirk filled his muzzle. \"Come on, don't be impolite. Introduce yourself.\"\n\nShe gave him a puzzled look. There was nobody here to be introduced to. But, on the other hand, trusting him had worked out well so far. Scanning across the mall's colorful concourse, she awkwardly addressed whoever was listening. \"Hi there! Um. I'm Tracy. If there's any ghosts, I'm sorry if I was too loud when I was exploring earlier. I thought this place was empty.\"\n\n\"[i]Very[/i] polite,\" he commended. \"Now give them a handshake.\"\n\nShe almost asked 'Who?' but from the way he was giggling she was pretty sure by now he was pranking her. She rolled her eyes. \"Okay. Hello, Mr. Ghost.\" She held out her arm and pumped it up and down.\n\nThen she almost screamed when her bracelet shook up and down all by itself.\n\nTracy yelped in surprise as something gave her a shove from behind. But she was caught and held before she could fall over. Something else tugged her leg, then her shoe. She cried out in panic. She was being pulled and turned to and fro, beyond her control. It was her clothes! They were going crazy! Her shirt and shorts were tugging her around in a circle, and her shoes were abetting them!\n\nThe fox tipped back his head in a cheerful chortle. With a glance towards the ceiling speakers, a Christmastime waltz began playing.\n\nTracy jolted at the sudden brassy introduction bellowed down from above her. But as the melody emerged and began to sway, her clothes started to keep time with it. Her bracelet held her arm out, while her shirt pulled her body forwards. Her shorts moved her legs and her shoes moved her feet. She gasped in delighted realization. She and her outfit were dance partners!\n\nThe music enfolded her in a brilliant whirlwind of sound; the notes drifting down to her ears like the mall's falling flakes. The harps, strings and woodwinds echoed all around her. Grand, soaring music to fill the heart with lightness. Her bracelet led the way like a gentleman's gloved hand. Her sneakers skimmed across the floor weightlessly, kicking up sparkling sprays of snow. Her mouth was wide open in speechless joy. \n\nTracy twirled and twirled. The lights and decorations blurred around her, making her just a bit dizzy. So she closed her eyes and let herself sway. Whatever was causing this, she allowed them her complete trust. She felt her clothes guide her all around the Christmas tree. She could hear the little train chug and rattle past. She felt warm snowflakes land on her face and melt instantly. The music pervaded her body until it seemed as if the rhythm alone was all that was holding her up.\n\nTracy didn't want it to end, but she felt the crescendo coming. Her bracelet lifted her arm high. Her shorts twirled her in a circle, then her shirt dipped her back so far her hair nearly touched the floor. The strings reached their strongest note, and with a jolly barroom of brass, the music reached a jubilant end.\n\nTracy was breathless, yet hadn't moved a muscle on her own. She applauded until her paws were sore. \"I don't know what just happened or who did that, but [i]thank you![/i] That was so much fun!!\"\n\nThe fox approached the giggling chipmunk and put a steadying paw on her shoulder. It looked like she might tip over from giddiness. \"You can't see them right now, but this is my family. Part of them at least. I have to say, they surprised me. They've been practicing with the mannequins, I see.\"\n\nTracy redoubled her efforts to spot the ghosts, squinting at thin air. \"How many of them are there?\"\n\n\"Eight, right now,\" he said. \"It changes from time to time.\"\n\n\"Well thank you! All of you!\" Tracy shouted. She heard herself echo, but if there was any response from the dancing phantoms, she couldn't tell.\n\n\"How about,\" the fox suggested, \"if you'd like to meet them face-to-face, you can come back tomorrow.\"\n\nTracy spun around to him, disappointed. \"Why not now? That'd be awesome to spend the whole night having a haunted sleepover!\"\n\nHe chuckled at her enthusiasm. \"I'm glad you think so. But look at the time. Don't you have a family to get home to?\"\n\nWhen he held out his watch, Tracy grabbed his arm to pull it closer. The little digital numbers made her blood run cold. \"Oh NO! You're right, I gotta get back! They'll be home by now! And it'll take me an hour to get there anyway!\" She looked up at the skylight. Within the angel's illusion the mall's own lights were glowing, but beyond them she could see black night sky. Tracy thought about what her parents might do, and started to jitter in panic.\n\nThe fox took her paws in his. \"Calm down. You lost track of time, but it's okay. You've got an hour to think of an excuse, right?\"\n\nShe forced herself to take a deep breath. \"That's right. Yeah.\" She looked towards Payne's. There was a hole in the spell now, letting her see past it to the dusty, empty showroom. She looked back to the angel and pulled their paws up to her cheeks. \"I don't want to leave though.\"\n\nHis smile was warm as pancakes and syrup. \"I'm so glad to hear you say so. But we'll have plenty of time tomorrow. Time is something I always have more of.\"\n\n\"Okay,\" she said, not quite understanding. She rustled her cheekfur against his soft paws for a moment, gazing up into his eyes. Then she remembered the time and made herself let go. She stepped back. She gave him a nod. \"Thank you for everything you showed me today. I [i]will[/i] come back tomorrow, I promise.\"\n\n\"I'll be here,\" he said simply.\n\nTracy took one last long look at the beautiful mirage. She wanted to etch this moment into her memory, just in case she'd find nothing but a ruined old ordinary building upon her return. She wanted to always remember this moment, even when she was an old grandma chipmunk in a rocking chair. When she had filled herself with as many details as she could hold, she looked down to her shirt pocket where her headphones dangled out. There was a special playlist she had, called TNT, that was only for use in emergencies. When she needed to burn as much speed as possible. Now was a perfect time for it.\n\nShe popped the buds in her ears and trotted towards the exit. It was surreal to pass through the edge of the illusion. She stepped back and forth a few times, from brightly lit funland to dreary abandoned displays. Up ahead she could see the door to the stockroom, and even a tiny glint that might have been the hole through the boards.\n\nSuddenly she scooted to a stop and turned around. From here the mall was back to being a dark, dirty wreck. But the fox in the guard's uniform was still standing there, watching her go.\n\n\"You never told me your name!\" she cried out.\n\nHe realized she was right, and rather than shouting it across the distance, he ran over to her. \"You're right, I didn't. Let me fix that.\"\n\nWhen he leaned in to whisper in her ear, his warm breath gave her shivers. The word he spoke was not a name she'd ever heard before, but it was befitting of an angel. It sounded like a breeze from across the ocean.\n\n\"[i]Nylsearis.\"[/i]\n\nThe name seemed to dissolve as soon as it touched her mind, as if mortals were not worthy to receive it. \"Can you spell that? Or write it down?\"\n\nA melancholy chuckle. \"Not really. Most of my cubs just call me Nyl.\"\n\nShe nodded. \"Okay. I can remember that.\"\n\nHe glanced towards the exit. \"Sure you'll be safe? It's dark out there.\"\n\nShe smiled at his concern. \"I have excellent night vision. Lotsa practice.\"\n\nHe was not surprised. Here was a girl who was better than she realized at taking care of herself. \"Go on home, Tracy.\"\n\nShe hesitated as long as she could. Wanting to be here instead of out in that winter evening cold, or her even chillier home. But he was right. They'd have more time tomorrow.\n\nTracy tore herself away and dashed for the stockroom. She put her music on, and let the screaming of electric guitars propel her faster into the night.\n\nThere was no light in the parking lot but the moon. Her pupils dilated. She felt fear, and the wind trying to steal her warmth, and knew that the only thing that would keep her safe now was her speed. So she ran.\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\n\nTracy arrived home feeling like a furnace on the inside and a glacier on the outside. Her nose and throat were in frigid agony, and her muscles equally so from hard use. From home to mall had taken her an hour this afternoon, but she thought she'd scraped at least fifteen minutes off that time coming back (even when she paused in the field to take a truly epic pee). As much as she dreaded the \"oh we were so worried\" lecture she was about to face, it would be worth it to just sit down. She could feel every pulse of her heartbeat in her calves, as if they were water balloons on the verge of bursting.\n\nShe pulled out her key and tried to unlock the side door as silently as possible. She heard the TV on loud. Maybe she could sneak upstairs unnoticed.\n\nBut when she eased the door to the kitchen open, she nearly peed her pants when the knob bumped into her father's backside.\n\n\"WHAT!?\" he spun around. \"Oh! Tracy! Good lord, you almost gave me a heart attack!\" Tracy's family was mixed; her father was a prairie dog. The kids had all turned out chipmunks (though the twins' fur was a bit sandy). Dad was portly and dressed as usual in his work suit. \"Shut the door, you're letting the cold air in.\"\n\n\"Oh, sorry!\" She locked up and scampered into the kitchen.\n\nDad looked like he wanted to get back to the TV. He had a freshly-opened can in his hand. \"So... you were out for one of your runs, huh?\"\n\n\"Yeah. Just around the neighborhood a few times. Like usual.\"\n\nHe awkwardly nodded. \"Allright. Exercise is good. So, eh, I picked up some Thai food. Over there: help yourself. I gotta get back to the living room. My back's killin' me.\"\n\n\"Okay,\" Tracy said in a weak mumble. She was stunned. Not a word of disapproval! He didn't even care she'd been gone. And when he left, he absent-mindedly turned the kitchen light off, draping her in darkness.\n\nNot knowing what to feel, Tracy wandered over to the counter where there were several greasy paper sacks and open trapezoidal containers. She got a fork from the drawer and looked over what was left. Everything seemed picked over. She rooted around and all she came up with was a box of white rice.\n\nShe didn't actually feel sad, or angry. Too tired, she supposed. She knew she couldn't eat just rice for dinner. But a good idea popped up and she went to the pantry to see if she could find a can of soup to dump on top of it. There were plenty. She chose chicken stew and debated heating it up, but couldn't stand waiting even three minutes to sit down. It'd be fine cold.\n\nTracy put her makeshift dinner and a cup of milk on a tray and headed across the livingroom to the stairs. Thankfully there was an alley behind the couch and her family. Their whale-sized TV was on and blaring, captivating the twins.\n\nJust as she was at the stairwell, her mother's voice stopped her in her tracks. \"Oh [i]there[/i] you are! Where were you? Out running again? We ordered dinner without you, I hope that's allright.\"\n\nTracy turned around, flinching a little. Her feet were throbbing. She really wanted to get upstairs and lay down. \"Yeah, it's fine.\"\n\nMom was looking regal as always with her huge cloud-like hairdo, full makeup, and poofy white bedroom robe. She didn't get out of her chair, just shouted over the show, \"You shouldn't run so much! Not in this weather at least. And what are you eating? Is that [i]dog food?[/i]\"\n\n\"It's just soup, Mom.\"\n\n\"Well if you didn't want Thai we could have ordered something else. IF you'd been here. But if you're fine with what you have there, I suppose...\"\n\nTracy leaned on the banister and put her foot on the first step, trying to let her body language say what she was too timid to speak. \"It's fine, Mom.\"\n\nTo her dismay, the voluptuous chipmunkess popped up from her recliner and shuffled across the carpet towards her. One of the twins got a static shock and howled. The other guffawed.\n\nMom paused in front of Tracy, kneading her hands together and looking upon her daughter like a room that needs redecorating. \"Honey, honestly, you shouldn't go out like that. A nice skirt would keep those skinny legs warmer, don't you think so?\"\n\nTracy's cheeks flushed. She began leaning heavily towards the stairs. \"Mommm...\"\n\n\"I'm just looking out for your well-being! You could do so much more with yourself!\" Her eyes sparkled. \"I know! This weekend I was going to spend the afternoon getting some touch-ups at the salon. You could come with me! A full makeover! Put some color in those cheeks!\"\n\nTracy tried very hard to conceal that she'd rather be barbecued. \"We'll see, Mom. I think Mr. Cherroot wants this big project thing done over the weekend.\"\n\nVisible annoyed disappointment. Mom pouted and bunched handfuls of Tracy's cheekfur up in her hands, mooshing them like dough. She sighed. \"Why don't you ever seem to want to [i]improve[/i] yourself, Tracy? A girl your age should have started wearing makeup years ago. Don't all your classmates?\"\n\n\"I guess,\" Tracy slurred through her mangled cheeks. \"Mom, I'm tired and my food's gonna get cold ...er.\"\n\nFor just an instant, the glare that Mom gave her said, 'Go on then, and don't ever come back down.' Then her lipstick smile returned. \"Allright then. Don't let me keep you. You don't want to eat dinner with your family? Want to lock yourself up in your room like a pouty teenager? That's perfectly allright.\" She glanced down and wrinkled her nose. \"And [i]what[/i] is that thing bulging out your pocket!?\"\n\nTracy thought up a lie so quick she was proud of herself. \"It's just an apple. For dessert.\"\n\n\"Well. At least you're making an effort to eat healthy.\" She turned to head back to her chair, and Tracy did not waste any time rocketing up the steps and out of sight.\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\n\nTracy shut her bedroom door. For a few moments, she just stared into space, feeling mortified and wishing she could sink into the carpet like quicksand. She locked the door behind her.\n\nShe set her tray on her desk, not really hungry anymore. She was about to take off running, divebomb her mattress and just fall right asleep in her clothes, but something in her pocket made her nix that. She was so glad Mom hadn't asked any further about it.\n\nIt was pure luck that she'd seen it. She had glanced to the side when she'd left the mall. Something had glimmered, and she had taken a gamble that it was worth a detour to investigate. The bench and the bus stop sign were gone. Nothing but cold, flat cement. She wondered how he'd done it, and what the heck she'd been sitting on. Had she just been hovering in midair? She supposed it was possible, given her clothes-dancing routine.\n\nThen she saw it. She bent over and picked it up in the moonlight. This was not an illusion.\n\nAnd now she pulled it out of her back pocket to place it gently on her bedside table. She sat down on the covers to admire it.\n\nHer ornament. Her shiny golden ball.\n\nShe picked it up and turned it in her paws. She could see her own reflection, but not a single crack or chip.\n\nShe didn't know how.\n\nBut maybe she could ask him tomorrow.\n\nDeciding she actually was hungry after all, Tracy brought her soup over to the bed and carefully bundled herself up in the covers. Cold chicken stew over rice was not bad. In between spoonfuls, she kept glancing at her ornament. It was nice to have a tangible souvenir. Otherwise, this was the part in any story where the main girl would start trying to convince herself she'd spent the whole afternoon in a hallucination. Some things were too good to be true. But maybe once in a while they were.\n\nShe finished her meal and licked the bowl clean. She was about to turn off the light and get an early start on sleep, but then she remembered her homework. She glanced contemptuously at her books. A huge part of her wanted to say 'to heck with it' and go to sleep anyway. But she compromised. She whipped through all four assignments on pure guesswork, figuring she might be able to pull off a C if she was lucky. Then she turned the light out and collapsed.\n\nShe wiggled herself deep into the blankets, wrapping her arms and legs around her plushie pile. Her feet were still throbbing, but overall she felt just... lovely.\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\n\n\n\nPART TWO\n\n*~*~*~*\n\nSchool the next day was excruciating. No, wait, that doesn't cover it. More like [i]ex...cru...ci....a...TING[/i].\n\nIt was like trying to fall asleep the night before your birthday. The teachers all talked in slo-mo and nothing could divert her attention long enough to make time pass. The clock was a granite sculpture. Tracy scarfed her lunch without tasting it and did nothing through recess but wander and fidget. When the bell finally rung at 3:00, she was [i]gone[/i]. Not even Mrs. Tabenaux's threat of detention could stop her paws.\n\nHer music pounded her skull, layered over a soundtrack of tweeting birds and passing cars. Her sneakers bounced off the cement like a moonwalk. She was headed east.\n\nOne of her favorite things about running was something Tracy called The Glide. That was the magic moment when she'd been running long and steady enough to slip into perfect flow. Where it felt as if she was putting no effort at all into her strides. The beat of the song was propelling her along, and her will was simply letting it happen.\n\nTracy had The Glide almost the entire way to the mall.\n\n'Hello parking lot!!' she shouted in her mind as she passed the last of the trees. This time she let caution fly and streaked straight across, trip-causing cracks bedamned. And she didn't stumble once. She wasn't running, she was floating. The sheer power of her grin was carrying her.\n\nThe only thing that could have put an end to her joy was seeing the hole boarded up. It was. Tracy scooted to a stop and gawked at the repaired doorway. No way. Absolutely not. She'd go home and get a claw hammer and pry it up herself if she had-\n\nIt winked at her.\n\nTracy stumbled back a few steps. The board had raised and lowered in a fluid motion, exactly like a winking eye. And just like that, the hole was plainly visible again.\n\nIt took a moment to dawn on her that she'd been pranked.\n\nBursting into laughter, she dove through the hole. \"You jerk!\"\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\nShe shouted his name as she ran through the deserted clothing store. To her overwhelming delight, the illusion began to shimmer into view ahead of her like a developing photograph. The tree's lights began to glow. Shops began to fill. Snow began to swirl.\n\nAnd by the time she made it through Payne's main entrance, the stuff was up to her ankles. It was a blizzard today! Yet as warm and soft as an avalanche of kitten fur. Tracy laughed in happiness. She stuck out her tongue to catch some flakes and was pleasantly surprised to find they had a hint of vanilla.\n\n\"Nyl! I'm back! I ran here as fast as I could! Well, [i]almost[/i] as fast as last night, but I didn't wanna break my ankles off!\" She looked all around the snowy mall but didn't see a blue uniform. \"Where are you!?\"\n\nAt her asking, footprints appeared in the snow. The dots connected in the direction of the bathrooms.\n\nThat was not her first choice of places to go, but it was not surprising either. Tracy readied herself for the grey and the black.\n\nFirst though, she took a leak and freshened up in the fabulous pink ladies room. Definitely the nicest one she'd ever peed in. And it gave her a moment to ease off the throttle. She was still pumped-up from her sprint. The deathroom was a solemn place not fit for such a mood.\n\nWhen she was ready, she entered. It was dim and colorless as before, but the fear had been replaced almost entirely by curiosity. Tracy felt like she'd barely seen anything yesterday compared to what more there might be today. \"Nyl?\"\n\nA calm voice reached through the darkness towards her. \"Tracy. I can't even express how happy I am that you came back.\"\n\nShe beamed. \"Me too. And thank you for fixing my ornament.\"\n\nA chuckle. \"Like I said, I only [i]mostly[/i] work in illusions. I can do a few real things too.\"\n\nTracy stared into the obscuring darkness at the back of the room. She felt like she hadn't been fully invited in yet.\n\n\"Do you think you're ready to see me as I truly am?\" he asked.\n\nHer answer was without hesitation. \"Yes! No matter what it is, I'll accept you!\"\n\nA rueful sigh. \"Don't be so certain.\" The blackness began to shift and churn. \"But if you are, then you may come closer.\"\n\nTracy steeled herself and stepped forward right away. The angel had already shown her his heart. Nothing else mattered. Not even if he was covered in spots and sores and horns, or if he was a big ugly bug with pincers. Tracy walked boldly into the black fog and found she actually had to swat it away like cobwebs. Bit by bit she waved it off. She wondered if he was so ashamed he couldn't let his protection down as easily as his illusions.\n\nShe began to see something through the mist. At first she thought it was a spiderweb.\n\nShe gasped when she finally broke through into the back of the room. It was still too dim for details, but she had a clear enough sense of the overall shape.\n\nThis part of the bathroom, if the two were mirrored in construction, would have corresponded to where the sinks were on the ladies' side. Here it was a gouged-out hollow. Like someone had scraped away reality itself. There was a fungus growing across the back wall. A plum-red mass of branching tentacles.\n\nNo, Tracy knew exactly what they looked like. Nerves. In the fourth grade, her class had studied anatomy. Tracy had done a project on the nervous system. That was what they looked like. An unfathomably complex network of nerves, spreading across the walls, floor and ceiling, like the ivy on her uncle's house. Like blue veins on the legs of old women. As Tracy crept closer, she could see they were throbbing. All of them, from the thickest stalks all the way to the thinnest offshoots. They were undulating in time to a heartbeat. And there in the dead center was a central mass that looked almost like a winged man. Like gravity had slammed him to the wall and entombed him there in his own flesh.\n\nThe voice that emanated from nowhere in particular was as calm as ever, but tainted with unmistakable sorrow. \"This is what happens to an angel when they flee Heaven. I don't know if it's the atmosphere, or to be apart from the presence of God. But I disobeyed him, and fled his wrath, and this is where I hide from his sight. Potentially forever.\"\n\nTracy walked with careful steps towards the pulsating center. Her face was stricken. She looked down at the ground, planning her movements to make sure she would not step on any of his red branches.\n\nWhen she was close enough, she reached out a shaking hand. Gingerly, she brushed a finger across the surface. She recoiled. It was bumpy, like rough vinyl. It felt exactly like her scab last summer when she'd tumbled down the incline by the freeway overpass and damn near tore her knee off. The wound had crusted into a huge leathery caterpillar. She still had the scar.\n\nHe could see the horror on her face. \"This is why I said last night that you weren't ready.\"\n\nBut when he looked closer, her expression was not horror. There were tears of sympathy in her eyes.\n\n\"Does it hurt?\" was all she asked.\n\nHer compassion warmed him. He didn't know if television and video games were desensitizing children to gruesome imagery year by year, but each time he'd let a new cub past his veil, it was a little easier for them. \"It used to,\" he said. \"For a while I looked like you might expect an angel to look. My wings were beautiful. After a few years, the itching started. By now it's stopped, thankfully. I feel about as much as you'd expect through the scars. It's not too bad.\"\n\n\"Especially when I make myself a new body to walk around in.\"\n\nThe second voice had come from behind her. She turned to see a familiar fox, this time in a button-down white shirt and blue jeans. Tracy gasped in happiness and ran across the room to hug him. It was wonderful to feel her cheek against his shirt, and his arms wrapping gently around her shoulders.\n\nMid-squeeze, she squeaked in embarrassment. She looked back over her shoulder. \"I just trampled right over some of you! I'm sorry!\"\n\nHis laugh jiggled her in his arms. \"Don't worry! I don't feel much, and you don't weigh much.\"\n\n\"Oh. Okay. I'm glad I didn't hurt you.\"\n\n\"You couldn't. Not even with cleats.\" She winced a bit and he chuckled. \"I... You don't know how much it means to me that you're taking this so well.\"\n\nShe looked as if she couldn't fathom why she wouldn't. \"I told you, I watch sci-fi stuff. I've seen weirder things in movies.\"\n\n\"It was more difficult before movies,\" he said.\n\nTracy considered that. Nyl had said he'd been on Earth for a very long time. What if she'd been born in the past where she'd never seen anything like this before? Where no one had ever even dreamt of it? Looking back over her shoulder at the fractal web of flesh, it was admittedly unpleasant. And if this had been the first thing she'd stumbled onto yesterday, then yeah, she probably would have screamed bloody murder and pooped her pants. But now she could look at all those pulsing scabby avenues and feel nothing but sympathy. It looked painful to be this, no matter what he said.\n\n\"Let's do something a little nicer,\" he suggested, leaning down and nuzzling her ear.\n\nShe wiggled at the tickle. \"Allright. Don't worry about me though.\"\n\nNyl took her hand and led her out of the room. Tracy took care again not to step on any of him, even if he'd said she couldn't hurt him. It was simply polite.\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\nTracy had only seen a fraction of the mall's illusion. The angel Nylsearis led her up the escalator towards the central hub, and she made herself dizzy from swiveling back and forth to see all the sights.\n\nMost of the stores were fully restocked with shining new merchandise. Tracy saw cell phones and video games, jewelry and shoes. There was a juice bar and a burger joint with enticing smells wafting towards her nose. But some of the spaces had been gutted and refurbished into bedrooms. Possibly these were stores that had sold nothing of interest to cubghosts. On one such room, the glass walls were entirely postered over for privacy, and a bead curtain replaced the metal gate. Another was transparent, letting Tracy see a huge bed, stockpiles of stuffed toys, towers of books and even a minifridge. Over these rooms, Tracy saw that letters had been pried off of other store's signs and rearranged to match the current occupants. She saw BONNIE and KEVIN and ELEANOR.\n\nIt occurred to her to wonder if, maybe someday, she'd be making a sign to put above her own mall bedroom.\n\nOh that was almost too wonderful to hope for! Tracy tried to clamp down the thrill that ran up her spine at that thought. She shouldn't presume. Nyl might just be introducing her for a visit. The other kids might not want her to stay. That thought felt depressingly likely. Tracy's tail drooped. After all, it wasn't like she had many friends at school either.\n\nThankfully, this dip in her mood did not last long. When they reached the central point of the mall's four main paths, the fountain blotted everything else out of Tracy's mind. In the mall's heyday it had been a futuristic deco structure, with water jets shooting up towards the main cupola skylight. That part had been restored, but also improved. It started with a wide marble perimeter, just the right height for weary shoppers to use as a bench. Inside was a moat where coins were flipped to make wishes. In the middle was a faux-rock outcropping from which a crystal spire emerged. But onto that structure had been grafted a gigantic tree-like climbing tower, made out of whatever materials little paws could scavenge. Tracy saw bedframes and ladders and crib sides and ceiling supports. She craned her neck until she almost toppled backwards. The junk-palace stretched up so tall, an accomplished climber could have stretched to touch the ceiling. Though the idea was petrifying, Tracy knew she would not be able to resist trying at some point.\n\nNyl took a seat on the marble ring. Beside him was a smaller out-jutting pond that he and the cubs had jury-rigged into a jacuzzi. A simple matter of turning the jets and the temperature way up. Once Tracy managed to pull her eyes away, she could see it bubbling.\n\n\"Are you comfortable with getting undressed?\" Nyl asked.\n\nTracy turned scarlet. She had NOT expected that question! \"Um, why!?\"\n\nHe looked playfully amused at her embarrassment. \"If you would like to meet the cubs you danced with last night, that will require me to lift your spirit out of your body. Only for a short while. But your body will sleep until I return your soul, and one of the safest places for it is our little hot tub here.\"\n\nTracy came close and leaned over the edge. \"I won't drown?\"\n\n\"No, no,\" he reassured. \"You'd be sitting up. I used to leave 'visitors' lying on a bed, but that had problems. Has your foot ever fallen asleep?\" Tracy nodded. \"Without your soul, your body would be completely immobile. Even in dreams you shift a little. The blood does not circulate well. You'd wake up feeling... 'completely crappy' was how one of my cubs described it.\"\n\nShe grimaced. \"Okay, so then the hot water keeps my blood moving around right?\"\n\n\"Exactly.\"\n\nShe squinted. \"It's not just an excuse to see me in my fur?\"\n\nShe'd said it jokingly, but he immediately curled his tail around his lap and folded his arms over it. \"Well... I don't want you to feel unease, but we tend to be relaxed here. We've all seen each other's fur. It's not out of the ordinary.\"\n\nTracy's whole face flushed warm. The idea was definitely taboo, and she could feel the little angel on her shoulder telling her 'absolutely not!'. Except, here was a [i]real[/i] angel, and he was saying it was okay.\n\nAnd it had been fun going along with everything else he'd suggested so far, hadn't it?\n\nTracy reached up to put her paws on her shoulders. \"Um, could you, uh, at least turn around first?\"\n\n\"Perfectly understandable. I'll even do one better.\" And he vanished.\n\nTracy yelped. He'd blinked out of existence like a light shutting off. \"I'd be happier if you didn't! Now it feels like you're invisible and peeking at me from everywhere!\"\n\nAn omnipresent chuckle. \"My apologies!\" Nyl reappeared, and this time walked around the side of the fountain and put his paws over his eyes. \"Better?\"\n\n\"Better.\" Blushing hot as lava, Tracy lifted the bottom of her shirt (robin's egg blue today) and pulled it up over her head. She dropped it on the floor and felt the air on her tummyfur. It suddenly occurred to her that, even if Nyl couldn't see her, there were a bunch of invisible cub ghosts probably hanging around right that very moment. \"Everyone else turn around too!\" she shouted, crossing her arms over her chest.\n\nThis was absolutely mortifying, but some part of Tracy was also enjoying it. It was [i]incredibly[/i] naughty. She was right in the center of the mall, totally exposed, with seemingly miles of empty space all around. She pulled down her shorts and tried to imagine doing this in a normal mall with shoppers walking by all around her. A tingle shivered up through her whole body. She stepped out of her shorts and was now standing out in the open in nothing but panties and footwear. She was trembling all over! [i]So[/i] embarrassing, yet also thrilling! Tracy sat down to get her shoes and socks off, and 'EEP!'ed at the cold marble. Even through her panties it was like sitting in a refrigerator. More carefully this time, she lowered herself down. Her teeth chattered a bit, but she got her laces undone and her socks pulled off, and tossed them over in the snow with her other clothes.\n\nShe wrapped her arms around herself and tried to be tiny. She could not believe she was sitting here in just her underpants! And she was definitely not gonna take those off with the possibility of anyone peeping. She rolled sideways into the water, shrieking a bit at the change in temperature, and soon tossed the small pink garment over the side.\n\nNow Tracy was huddled in the bubbly water, still shivering, but also feeling like a boiled potato. (It was the opposite of finishing her run last night, she realized.)\n\n\"All finished?\" Nyl called out.\n\n\"Y-y-yes.\"\n\nThe fox walked around into her view. Tracy squished herself down even deeper into the concealing water, suddenly acutely aware of how handsome he was. She'd never thought much about Pred guys before (figuring her parents would never let her hear the end of it if she dated outside her genus), and she'd [i]definitely[/i] never thought about adult Preds. But Nyl, or at least his projected form, was tall and well-groomed, with a lustrous tail and those eyes that could make her melt.\n\nIt fully struck her then that she was trusting him to take her very soul out of her body. The ignominy of nudity had pushed that fact out of her mind. But not only did she believe he could do such a thing, she had accepted it without hesitation. Without even thought. 'Well, why shouldn't I trust him? I want to meet the ghost kids. And he's been entirely nice to me so far.'\n\nThat rhetorical question resonated with her. Why [b]shouldn't[/b] she trust him? He'd shown he was worthy of it. And the danger alarms weren't coming from within herself: it was the voices of her parents, and her teachers, and the PSAs on TV that said everyone you didn't know was to be feared and avoided. Her own senses told her that she liked when Nyl would give her a hug or hold her hand. Tracy decided she'd rather listen to herself for once than everyone else.\n\nTracy closed her eyes and let herself relax. The water felt blissful now that her body had acclimated to it. The heat reached into her muscles and massaged them from inside. The young rodent eased her posture into a comfortable sitting position, propped up by the marble wall at her back. \"I'm ready, Nyl. What now?\"\n\nShe heard the splash of his shoes stepping into the water in front of her. \"Nothing difficult, I assure you. I'm just going to put my hands on your shoulders, then I'll pull. It'll feel strange. Your reflex will be to fight it. Of course, your instincts will want to keep your soul inside your body. But I’ll take it nice and slow. There'll be a tugging, then you'll pop loose, and then you'll be a pretty little poltergeist.\"\n\nShe giggled bashfully at that. \"It's, um, reversible, right? I'm sure you'd have said so if it wasn't. I just kinda wanna hear it.\"\n\n\"Perfectly understandable.\" He stepped closer and she felt his palms cup her bare shoulders. \"And 100% reversible. I've done this so many times I've lost count. Never a misstep.\"\n\nShe exhaled and let herself go totally limp. Her feet were near a water jet and the bubbles felt like tiny tongues lapping at her soles. \"I'm ready.\"\n\nJust as he had described, there was an unearthly pull: a sensation she had only ever encountered in dreams before. Tracy let go of her doubts and leapt into the feeling. It was over in an instant. Far easier than she'd expected, just like slipping off a thick winter coat. And then she was standing up.\n\nA booming cheer shocked her eyes open.\n\nSuddenly she was surrounded by a mini-mob of other children! Tracy squeaked and reached down to cover herself up, but was mind-boggled to realized she somehow had her clothes on. Her yellow and green outfit from yesterday, actually. And she was standing IN her nude, semi-submerged body! Her feet were phasing right through her legs!\n\nSeeing that the little chipmunk was inarticulate from confusion, Nyl scooped her into his arms and lifted her out of the fountain. Immediately she was swarmed by a cluster of cubs, all eager to say hello first.\n\nTracy's world spun around. She blinked and a dozen bright eyes were focused on her. Eight sunny smiles under eight twitching noses.\n\n\"Hi!\" \"Welcome!\" \"You came back!\" \"Hello!\" \"Hi!\" \"Glad to meet you!\"\n\nTracy was buffeted by an avalanche of positivity. She'd never had a welcome so warm. \"Um, hi! My head's kinda swimmy. One at a time, if that's okay?\"\n\nOne eager mousie bustled everyone else out of her way to be first. \"Hi!\" she blared. Tracy was ensnared in a rib-cracking hug. \"I'm Cassie! You were here last night! We were the ones that made your clothes dance! Wasn't that fun? You looked like you really enjoyed it! It was my idea!\"\n\nWords came out of this girl like bullets from a machine gun. When Tracy was released from the hug, she saw that Cassie was a white mouse, a bit shorter than her, with manic joy in her eyes and very unusual fur. It was as fluffy as an angora rabbit's (her cheeks were enormous), and she had chocolate-colored tiger stripes drawn all over her from head to toe.\n\nPlus, her fur was almost all she was wearing.\n\n\"Oh!\" Tracy fidgeted. \"How come I've got clothes and you don't?\"\n\nCassie's long whiskers bounced as she grinned. \"Don't you usually have 'em on in your dreams? Same thing here. That's how you see yourself!\" She stepped back and spread her arms. \"On the other paw, why would I cover up my stripes? Aren't they great?\"\n\nTracy was feeling all sorts of enjoyably confusing feelings at standing next to another girl who was stark naked except for her hot pink sandals. \"They do look awesome on you.\"\n\n\"[i]THANKS![/i]\" Cassie boomed, and squeezed Tracy again.\n\n\"I think she's overwhelmed, Cass. Give her some air.\" A hooved paw pried the mouse off the chipmunk like a crowbar, then held itself out for a shake. \"I'm Tybalt. Pleased to meet you.\"\n\nThe young whitetail buck was a much calmer presence than Cassie. Also taller! Tracy was a bit awestruck by his antlers. Tybalt looked a year or so older than everyone else, and had that 'in charge' vibe that older brothers or hall monitors usually did. Tracy shook his hand and nibbled her bottom lip. \"Pleased too. Um. Also. To meet you, I mean.\"\n\nHe chuckled at her shyness. He had a really nice smile. \"I'm kind of second-in-command when Nyl's not around,\" he said, and the angel gave him a confirming pat on the shoulder. Tybalt was also dressed in mostly blue like the angel. \"But I'm not, like, a jerk about it. All bossy all the time. Just when we need stuff decided, that's all.\"\n\nTracy nodded in agreement that such a furson was a necessary function of a group.\n\n\"Um, I guess I'll hand it off then. Who else wants to-?\"\n\nThree other cubs lunged to make the next introduction, but a leopard girl shouldered her spirit-siblings out of the way. \"Saffron,\" she declared as she thrust her paw towards the chipmunk.\n\nA little intimidated, Tracy shook it. Saffron immediately gave off a vibe of that one girl who wants all the boys to know she's just as good as them. Her headfur was up in a headband, and her other clothes suggested an aerobics outfit. Plus, however Cassie had gotten her stripes, it looked like Saffron had made use of it too: the yellow of her fur had been taken to a lemony extreme and all her spots were dyed different neon colors. \"I really like your fur!\" Tracy said.\n\nSaffron looked the newcomer up and down, assessing. She grinned. \"'Course you do.\" The tone was a bit rude, but the smile said the compliment was very much appreciated. The leopard stepped back and crossed her arms behind her to let someone else take their turn.\n\nThe two she'd nudged out of the way a moment ago both leaned in to grab Tracy's paws and shake them at the same time. Tracy was surprised enough to meet a platypus in real life (she'd only ever seen them in books before), but felt her brain melt when standing next to him was a giant bug!\n\nThe platy boy had glossy brown fur and a beak that resembled dark chocolate. Also a purple shirt with a rude joke on it, and no pants. \"Good day to you, madame. I am Freddy. My buddy Kevin likes to change species all the time. Today he's an ant.\"\n\n\"Yes you are,\" Tracy said, gawking. Kevin had normal-little-boy eyes and proportions, but also a bristly red exoskeleton, four arms, a bulbous butt, antennae; the whole nine yards. He also had black jeans and a horror movie tee.\n\nHe noticed she was a bit freaked out. \"Oh, I'm sorry! Here, is this better?\" He squeezed his eyes shut like he was about to barf, then his whole head shimmered and inverted itself into that of a green-furred bunny rabbit. \"There. It's what I woke up as this morning at least.\"\n\n\"An ant with a rabbit head!?\" Tracy squawked.\n\n\"Not the ant part. That's new. I was in a buggy mood this afternoon.\"\n\n\"I guess it's okay with me if you want to be a bug.\"\n\n\"Do you mind if I'm a monotreme?\" Freddy slid in to ask. He waggled his eyebrows. \"I lay eggs.\"\n\n\"You don't lay eggs,\" Kevin said. \"You're a boy.\"\n\n\"I can if I want to!\"\n\nSeeing that those two were now distracted, the giraffe in glasses saw the chance to make her move. She squeezed past them and grinned humongously at Tracy. \"Hi! Have you ever played any of the Baron Mind games?\"\n\nTracy blanked. \"Um, I'm not sure what they are.\"\n\nThe giraffe looked crestfallen. But then she perked right back up again. \"Oh. OH! Wait, that's great! That means I can show them to you! The game shop's got the whole series, and the DVD place has the movies too! They were only released in Japan, but we got some import copies!!\"\n\nTracy could not resist a giggle at this girl's sheer bubbly zeal. She was tall, but not as ridiculously tall as Tracy might have expected a giraffe girl to be. She did have to look up a bit to make eye contact though. Which was doubly odd because the girl's glasses must have had a hellacious prescription on them. The lenses were thick as bread slices. Tracy wondered why a ghost would still need glasses. \"Um, I think I forgot your name?\"\n\nThe giraffe blinked, then winced. \"No, I got so excited I forgot to tell you. I'm Eleanor.\" She leaned in for a pawshake, but Tracy anticipated a hug and opened her arms, so Eleanor opened her arms, but by then Tracy had put out her paw, so Tracy just grabbed it and yanked her into a hug.\n\nAfter a big squeeze Eleanor stepped aside politely. Tracy was intrigued by the new paw that came her way to shake, as it was attached to a pair of wings. \"Violet,\" the flying squirrel said simply. She had a warm, patient smile and a perceptive glint in her eye. Flaps of skin, exactly like a furred blanket, extended from her wrists, down her sides, and all the way to her feet. Her single garment was a bit like a sandwich: a sheet of shiny bronze fabric connected to ankle bracelets, stretched up to a neck collar, and was mirrored with another layer at the back.\n\nWhile Tracy was staring at its curve-hugging construction, the young squirrel pulled the chipmunk closer and whispered in her ear, \"I'm the sensible one. Everyone else here is [i]nuts[/i].\" When she pulled back, she let Tracy see a pixyish grin and a big wink.\n\nTracy giggled. \"I love your wings. Can you really fly?\"\n\n\"Pretty close,\" she said proudly. She spread them wide to show off. Tracy got a better look at the designs and drawings painted all over them, front and back. Violet was a living art gallery. Fur-dyeing was popular around here.\n\nTracy looked around. Was that everyone? She could have sworn she'd seen someone else. Oh! There at the back, behind where Freddy and Kevin were talking animatedly, a small dark furball cowered. Tracy figured if the little skunk wasn't going to step forward, she would have to make introductions herself.\n\nShe passed by the platypus and now-fully-an-ant-again, overhearing Kevin say, \"Geez, this unbalances things even [i]more[/i]! Six girls to three boys!\"\n\n\"That just means we get two each,\" Freddy replied suavely.\n\nTracy snorted at that. Yet she also felt a little thrill that these two were [i]already[/i] accepting of the idea that she might stay. They didn't even know her yet! She approached the skunkette with a wide smile. \"Hi! I'm Tracy, and you are...?\" A memory of bedrooms came back. \"Oh! If I've met everyone else, then you must be Bonnie, right?\"\n\nShe was a big-eyed bundle of bashfulness is what she was. Bonnie stared at Tracy, looking both panicked and hopeful, with one paw behind her back and the other covering her mouth. Mumbling while nibbling her knuckles she replied, \"Um. Yes.\"\n\nTracy felt a wave of empathy. She was a wallflower at school, but she didn't have it [i]this[/i] bad. She squatted down a little, since the skunk was definitely the shortest of the bunch. Bonnie had a simple yellow dress, blue eyes, and fur that was almost entirely ebony. There was just a thin white stripe from the bridge of her nose to her forehead, and a splash of it in her tail too. \"It's allright if you're shy. I'm usually pretty quiet too.\"\n\nHesitantly, Bonnie reached out for a quick shake. \"It's not that. It's... I get worried new people won't like me. I have... secrets.\"\n\nTracy blinked. \"Well. Um. I just found out Nyl's a big weird nerve cluster thingy today and I don't mind that. And,\" she figured sharing a secret of her own might help, \"I was a bedwetter til I was six,\" she admitted with a twitch.\n\nBonnie seemed to find this highly intriguing. \"Okay. Maybe we [i]will[/i] get along then,\" she said hopefully.\n\nSeeing that Tracy had completed the circle, and heartened by the all-around welcoming mood, Nyl stepped up onto the marble ring. \"Everyone! I'm so glad you're all showing our dear guest Tracy the best sides of yourself. I'm especially glad to see a smile out of you, Bonnie.\"\n\nThe skunkette's eyes sparkled with rapture at hearing that. \"Yes, Master Nyl!\" she shouted back. Then she realized what she'd just said right in front of the new girl. She squealed, slammed her paws over her muzzle, and vanished into thin air.\n\nTracy raised her eyebrows at that. The skunk had blushed so hard it'd been visible through fur.\n\nNyl looked ruffled. \"Oh. Um! Tracy, I assure you, I don't make anyone call me that.\"\n\n\"Bonnie's got a special [i]thing[/i] with \"Master Nyl\",\" Cassie gossiped gleefully.\n\n\"She probably teleported back to her room,\" Eleanor piped up to Nyl. \"I'll coax her back out.\"\n\nHe nodded to the giraffe. \"Thank you. I'm sure she wouldn't really want to miss this.\"\n\nEleanor nodded back, then trotted off southward.\n\nTybalt stepped over to Tracy. \"Sorry. It's probably gonna come out sooner or later that things get a little... 'weird' around here.\"\n\nShe kneaded her paws together at her side and smiled bashfully at him. \"I think, maybe, I might be okay with that, actually.\"\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\nBeing pulled in every direction at once had never been more enjoyable.\n\nEveryone wanted to show off their favorite things for Tracy. Cassie most of all. She leapt into the mantle of The Explainer, leading their new guest on the grand tour of the mall and rarely stopping to take a breath. Tracy was joyfully overwhelmed just walking around without actually going inside any of the places that were shown off to her. The mall seemed bigger every time she turned a corner. She got the feeling she could explore here for years and never see it all.\n\nNyl was content to sit this one out. He'd said that, since he and Tracy had already made introductions, he'd take a break and let his mind slip back in his body to rest a while. This seemed like a normal occurrence from the reactions, Tracy observed. She wondered if it took energy to keep up his illusion-self.\n\nCassie started with the north concourse. First up was a sparkling jewelry store, where she pointed out that none of the display cases had glass in them. She swept her arm through one and it came up dripping with gold necklaces. \"We have fashion shows all the time,\" she said. Freddy added, \"And we see how much of this junk we can wear.\" He held up an arm that was covered to the shoulder in watches. Across from the jeweler's there was a large empty office they used for hockey, wrestling, or other close physical activity. (Tracy did not pick up on that innuendo until hours later.) At the front of the mall was the main entrance: a humongous arched structure that kept rain off customers and looked like splashes of paint frozen in time. The first two areas past the entrance were a craft store that had become Cassie's thoroughly-bedazzled bedroom ('Of course she'd want to be right up front,' Tracy thought with a grin), and the food court. Lovely smells surrounded the place. Tracy waded through the herds of tables to check out the eateries. Lots of franchises she enjoyed, including her favorite Mexican place. Also, they had one of those tiny shops with the excruciatingly expensive cinnamon buns. The ones that smelled sooo good. Tracy was overjoyed when Violet reached her hand right through the glass and plucked one out of the display case for her. Tracy didn't even notice that another one took its place instantly. She was too busy cramming gooey goodness into her muzzle. \"And we're all dead, so calories don't matter!\" Violet noted.\n\nNext was the east wing. Cassie pointed out shops selling perfume (\"Sometimes we play tag, running around trying to spritz each other,\" she said), scooters (\"The floors in here are GREAT for racing!\" said Tybalt) and lingerie (\"Those two are always in there,\" the tigermouse said, pointing to Kevin and Freddy. \"Bras make the best slingshots for water balloons,\" the platypus defended). In the center of the aisle was also a newsstand with rows of candy bars and tall shelves packed with colorful stuffed animals. Tracy ooohed at them. Cassie said, \"We can duplicate anything here. There's a room that's floor-to-ceiling stuffies! You can just jump right in! Great for stress relief!\" Tracy could not wait to try that. Down further was the aforementioned plush room, plus more stores full of calendars, gift baskets, or shoes. Tracy saw intricate shoebox fortresses constructed inside. At the very end of the hall was one of the two big department stores. Tracy couldn't see inside, because a sail-sized patchwork of bedsheets was covering the front. Before she could ask about it, Kevin pointed to a strange machine nearby that almost looked like an automatic tennis ball returner. \"The mall never had a theater in it unfortunately, so we made our own. That's the projector. We built that thing ourselves!\" Tracy let out a loud, \"Wow!\"\n\nDoubling back, Cassie led the way to the west section. Eleanor pointed out that the bulk candy store was right beside the video game place. \"Good for snacking during pauses. Kevin and I cracked all the demo machines so they'll play everything like normal. And we found some other systems in the department stores too. Plenty to share.\" She demonstrated this principle by entering the candy store, jamming her hand into a tub of gummi bears, and cramming as many into her mouth as she could. They went everywhere. Tracy giggled and tried a pawful of chocolate almonds. Mmmm! She guessed that she didn't have to worry about using scoops, since there were no spirit germs. Cassie continued on, rhapsodizing about some of the big-name clothing stores, but Tracy was more enamored of the bookshop they passed. She could spend [i]weeks[/i] reading in there. And they had music too! Something she had not taken notice of was that, all along the perimeter of the ceiling, there were alcoves for fluorescent lights. While Tracy was gazing at paperbacks, Saffron gave her a shove. \"That's [u]my[/u] bedroom,\" she said, and pointed up. Tracy was amazed to see that it was actually inside one of these lighting alcoves: a trough-shaped space crammed with mattresses, posters, and clothes. Nets full of other possessions dangled off the side. Tracy looked all around, not seeing any ladders. \"How do you get UP there!?\" Saffron grinned, showing off her feline teeth. She dashed towards the wall, then went running straight up it as if gravity didn't matter. Tracy's mouth was hanging open when the leopardess waved proudly from her upper bunk.\n\nHeading back down towards the south end, Violet indicated the fountain-tower and modestly bragged that she practiced gliding from it every day, and was [i]so close[/i] to getting all the way across to touch the movie screen. Tybalt also explained to Tracy that, if she thought this place was a good fit for her and she ever wanted to move in, there was always space for another bedroom. Several stores with similar goods could be consolidated, and she could build her own bed and decor from stuff in the department stores. He actually lived in a tent in the outdoor section of Granger's, since it was relatively quiet there. Tracy thought that sounded nice. She told him she couldn't believe everyone was so accepting of her. He chuckled. \"Even with all this cool stuff, sometimes it can get a little boring. The best way to make it all fun again is to share it with someone new.\" Tracy very much liked the idea of being someone new to share with. Speaking of that, when they passed by Bonnie's room, Eleanor was just then succeeding at bulldozing her out the door. The skunk looked mortified to see Tracy, but the chipmunk just gave her an 'I honestly don't mind' shrug. Bonnie looked like she couldn't believe it, then smiled a tiny smile, and joined the rest of the kids at the back of the parade.\n\nSince Tracy had already seen the bottom floor of the south end, Cassie took everyone up the escalators to the upper deck. Tracy was about to lose herself running into the CD store, but then Cassie remembered the chipmunk's amazing tree leap from the day before. Everyone else did too. Soon Tracy was swarmed with congratulations. She blushed, but basked in all of it. Violet and Saffron had made the same jump lots of times, \"But I can't believe you tried it without us there to catch you!\" the leopard said. \"And [i]you've[/i] still got bones to break!!\" Tracy admitted she didn't know what had come over her, and was more than happy to move on with the tour. She saw a window full of beautiful prom dresses, an ear-piercing place (Violet pointed out her own two silver studs), a pretzel kiosk, and a hidden-from-below hallway that led to an arcade! Eleanor said, \"They still take tokens, but we busted open the token machine so that's no problem. And you don't have to spend all day on skeeball to get tickets for the big prizes. Just jump over the counter if you feel like it!\" Saffron nudged Tracy. \"By the way, you [u]cannot[/u] beat me at Dance Till You Die,\" she challenged. Tracy blushed. \"Maybe I'll try.\" She thought with all her running to the beat, she might have an advantage. \"Hey, I've only won against her twice,\" Tybalt admitted.\n\nAs the group headed back downstairs for some lunch, Freddy pointed over the edge. \"It's awesome to clear out one of the clothing stores and make a big pile to leap into from up here. Or we'll knock the heads off mannequins with baseball bats to see how far they go. Oh! And see the big escalator back there? Sometimes we'll have it snow real hard and go tobogganing down it. And in the summer, we flood the whole downstairs and make it a waterslide!\" Tracy was intrigued, but worried. \"But the toy store down there! Won't everything get ruined?\" \"Nah,\" the platy said with a handwave, \"We can make the water go wherever we want, or stop. We could even flood the whole place and still keep our bedrooms dry.\" Eavesdropping, Cassie suddenly shouted, \"OhmiGOD we should DO that!! We could swim up and touch the skylights!!\"\n\nThe group headed for the food court and found their guardian angel waiting for them in a chef's hat. \"Wilkommen, senoritas and garçons! It is my pleasure to serve you. What would you enjoy today?\"\n\nGrins lit up and kids all dashed over and around the tables. Tracy was left behind bepuzzled, but soon saw for herself exactly what the game was. All the other kids ran to their favorite restaurants and started shouting out orders. Nyl challenged himself to see how fast he could blink around, popping up beside cash registers and whipping up trays full of steamy entrees.\n\nWhat to choose though? Tracy knew she liked Caliente's burritos, but the Chinese place looked good too. On the other hand, everyone else would be eating by the time she'd finished reading over the menus. Little Sicily was closest and had three pizzas rotating in the display window. Simple choice. Tracy dashed over and whistled for Nyl's attention. The angel looked a little out of breath, but glowing from the happiness of making his cubs happy. When Tracy put her order in, she was surprised to see that Nyl didn't actually take a slice from on display. He simply pushed a tray towards her and food magically appeared. \"Neat!\"\n\nAt the chance to explain something, Cassie also magically appeared. \"Yeah! Nyl doesn't just make stuff happen, he's pulling up stuff that's already here.\"\n\nTracy looked a little confused at that, so the angel clarified. \"I'm drawing on the memories of people who shopped and worked here. Anything they can remember touching, I can recall.\"\n\nTracy looked down at her pizza. \"So someone else has eaten this exact same slice before. Huh.\"\n\n\"Probably several of us,\" Cassie noted. \"Let's go! Come sit by me!\"\n\nAs Tracy was shanghaied away, she called to Nyl, \"Gonna eat with us too?\"\n\n\"Be there in a jif!\"\n\nCassie enthusiastically frog-marched Tracy over to the biggest table in the center of the food court, where everyone else was already setting their trays down. The tigermouse started eagerly stuffing herself with curly fries and barbecue ribs. Tracy sat, and Freddy was to her left.\n\n\"So,\" the platy said, \"did Tybalt tell you about his intense living situation?\"\n\nTracy had just opened her mouth to respond with concern, when the pun hit her. She grimaced. Freddy cackled. \"You should be spanked for that!\"\n\n\"Is that a promise?\" he asked brightly.\n\nShe kicked his chair and he chortled.\n\nChatter mostly stopped as the cubs focused on their meals. Tybalt carefully chopsticked his stir-fried vegetables. Bonnie sipped hot cocoa, while beside her Eleanor shoveled into a banana split with an almost-nauseating enfoldment of toppings. Kevin had followed Freddy in getting big sloppy cheeseburgers. Saffron had a pita wrap. Violet slurped spaghetti. And when Nyl finally got a chance to sit down, he had just a simple salad.\n\nTracy very much enjoyed her sausage, olive and onion slice, though it was so big and floppy she had to roll it up on the sides like a cigar. While she nibbled, she took the opportunity to observe everyone else's interactions. Bonnie seemed to like everyone, but Eleanor was the only one she was close to. Violet, Saffron and Tybalt looked like they had a friendly rivalry going on between them. Cassie kind of monitored everyone to make sure they were having a good time. Freddy and Kevin seemed inseparable, though Tracy also observed Kevin and Eleanor, and Freddy and Tybalt, making plans for hanging out later. Violet seemed a bit aloof; comfortable with everyone, but also comfortable with her own company. And Nyl was completely neglecting his salad, just watching over his cubs with a contented smile and his head resting on his hand. His love for all of them appeared genuine and steadfast.\n\nTracy realized that no one was here to make her finish her crust if she didn't want to, and the food was only a memory anyway so nothing would go to waste. When she finished her last bite, she flicked on her music player to check the time. \"Yikes! I should be getting home soon!\" The time had flown by way too fast.\n\n\"Awwww!\" Cassie pouted. \"I had activities planned for when we finished eating!\"\n\n\"They can wait for tomorrow,\" Nyl said patiently, patting her on the head.\n\n\"I am really sorry! I'd love to stay,\" Tracy told her, and everyone else. She stifled a small burp. \"I just hope I'll be hungry enough for dinner by the time I get home. Which reminds me, how'm I gonna get back inside my body?\"\n\n\"Don't worry. Nyl can get you back in,\" Tybalt reassured. \"You might even try reincorporating yourself.\"\n\nTracy thought that sounded like an interesting challenge. She smirked to Nyl. \"Race you there!\" Then she vaulted over the back of her chair and took off running.\n\nShe giggled all the way to the fountain, but of course the angel was already there waiting for her. \"Never race someone who can travel by thought,\" he advised.\n\n\"Maybe if I keep practicing I'll beat you someday,\" she said, happily winded.\n\nThe other kids caught up soon enough (Eleanor had brought her split along and was slurping the last drips). They clustered around to say their farewells.\n\nTracy couldn't help getting misty-eyed. \"Today was wonderful. Thank you. All of you! Tomorrow's a school day, but so long as I don't get roped into chores, I'll be back. And then it'll be Saturday so...\" A too-good-to-be-true idea occurred to her. \"Maybe I can tell Mom 'n Dad I'm going to a sleepover! If I can pull it off, I could spend the whole weekend here!\" Her heartbeat quickened at such an awesome possibility.\n\n\"We'd [u]love[/u] that,\" Cassie said earnestly, giving the chipmunk's paws a squeeze.\n\n\"Yeah, you seem like a lot of fun. And... cute,\" Kevin admitted shyly.\n\nTybalt patted her arm. \"We definitely want you back.\"\n\n\"Definitely,\" Violet agreed.\n\n\"Me too,\" Bonnie piped up, then gave Tracy the adorablest tiny smile.\n\nCassie literally jumped for joy. \"Oh this is gonna be GREAT! I can FEEL it! Tracy's gonna absolutely [i]ace[/i] the devotions!\"\n\nAt that sound of that word, the mood instantly got awkward. Lots of \"um...\"ing. Freddy made a 'cut it out' gesture across his throat.\n\nTracy didn't know what to feel. Devotions? Were these trials she'd have to take to be included? Or some kind of hazing? Her tummy rumbled.\n\n\"That's... a little premature, Cassie,\" Nyl told her, his tone conveying both admonishment and understanding of her excitement. \"And it is entirely for Tracy to decide. She has to get home now. We can discuss the possibility next time.\"\n\nThe striped mousie lowered her head. \"You're right, Nyl. I'm sorry.\" She gave a quick peek to Tracy. \"Don't get scared though. They're fun. We all did 'em.\"\n\n\"[u]Next[/u] time,\" Nyl reiterated.\n\n\"I just didn't want her going home worryin' about 'em all night!\" Cassie defended.\n\n\"I actually do appreciate that,\" Tracy noted.\n\nNyl reached out to gently rustle both girls' headfur. \"It's settled for now. Tracy, you'd better get back into yourself. Would you like to try doing it on your own?\"\n\n\"I'll do my best,\" she said. She hopped up onto the marble ring. Everyone was looking up at her. 'I'll stop being able to see them once I'm 'alive' again,' she realized. \"Goodbye, everyone. I'll see you again, I promise. No matter what.\"\n\n\"See you soon,\" Saffron said, and gave her tennis shoe a send-off pat.\n\nTracy smiled to all of them, then looked down at her snoozing self. There was the brief worry that maybe this wouldn't work and she'd end up bodiless forever, doomed to walk the earth as a lost soul. 'No. I trust Nyl,' she reassured herself. And even so, it wouldn't be so bad if that did happen.\n\nDeciding to be bold, Tracy plugged her nose, jumped, and did a cannonball into herself.\n\nThere was a humongous splash. Her eyes shot open. The mall was completely empty again.\n\nShe gulped air, feeling lightheaded. Her skin was tingly and her paws felt heavy. Definitely disorienting, but nothing she couldn't handle. She looked all around. The other cubs were gone. Nyl was gone. The illusion was gone too. She was all by herself in an abandoned mall fountain. \"Geez, and I'm naked too!\" she remembered. Thank goodness the water had also vanished. She didn't want to have to imagine running home through November weather in wet fur. She'd freeze solid!\n\nBlushing, but not nearly as embarrassed anymore, Tracy simply stood up, climbed down, and got dressed. There was a bit of remaining dizziness in her head, like last summer when she'd gotten off the boat ride, but she thought a bit of activity would reorient her flesh and spirit. She loaded her music player back in her pocket and realized it had been lying right out in the open where anyone could steal it. 'Then again, so was I'. But of course, that was a silly thought. Nyl would have kept anyone out who'd do something like that.\n\nShe pulled her laces tight and got up, jogging in place for a few steps. She took in one last look before leaving. The sun shone brightly through the ceiling glass, illuminating dust motes in the air that almost looked like snowflakes.\n\n\"Goodbye,\" she said again quietly. \"See you soon.\"\n\nShe took off running towards the exit, working her essence back into her body with each step until she found her groove again.\n\nWhen she was almost to the gap in the boards, Nyl's voice spoke from an indistinct point, \"You're always welcome here.\"\n\nTracy smiled all the way home.\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\nThe next day at school, she debated which of her friends she could ask a big, big favor from. They were all the type of friendships where they only saw one another during class or at lunch. All of them had closer friendships than her. Tracy eventually settled on Marissa, who seemed the most generous.\n\nThe little rabbit winced a bit when Tracy brought it up. She liked to help her friends, but Tracy wasn't a 'big, big favor' type of friend. The chipmunk was kind of spacey. A girl who got lost in her own thoughts so much, sometimes you'd have to get her attention twice to say something to her. Thankfully she didn't want to borrow money or anything.\n\n\"Look, I'll give my mom your phone's number instead. If she calls during the weekend- which she might not!- just rush through an answer. Like, 'Yeah we're having lotsa fun gotta go bye!' If you could have loud music or the TV on, that'd be even better.\"\n\n\"I feel weird about lying to your mom,\" Marissa said. \"Where are you gonna be anyway? I mean, you [i]could[/i] come over for real, I guess,\" she said, visibly unsure about the idea but trying to be polite about it.\n\nThe rabbit was relieved to see that Tracy hadn't even noticed the offer. Instead the chipmunk blushed a lot. \"Um, don't tell anyone? But I'm sneaking off to see a secret boyfriend.\"\n\n\"Ohhhhh.\" That made everything make sense. \"Allright then. I'll cover for you. Lemme guess, is he older? Is he a Pred?\"\n\n\"Both,\" Tracy admitted vaguely.\n\nMarissa giggled. She knew parents could get all horrified about things like that.\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\nTracy shot home from school that afternoon, eager to ditch her backpack and go running to the mall. She'd gotten home in the nick of time last night, bumbling through the door just as everyone else was sitting down in front of the TV with their food. Take-out again. Mom and Dad cooked exactly often enough to keep up appearances and no more. But she ate, and watched, and made conversation. And before she went to sleep, she put her pillow between her legs and damn near ground it to powder thinking about her afternoon.\n\nThe cars were gone again; that was a good sign. But when Tracy shut the door behind her, two fuzzy heads popped out from the kitchen.\n\n\"Mom just left! She said she knew you'd be home soon!\" Trent said.\n\n\"Yeah, you gotta take care of us!\" Trixie added.\n\n\"Mom said so!\" Trent affirmed.\n\n\"Gimme a juice!\" Trixie demanded.\n\nTracy growled a bit at being drafted without consent. She trudged into the kitchen and got Trixie her juice box, and then Trent wanted one too, so then Trixie wanted the cartoon-shaped crackers to go with it, and then Trent did too.\n\nTracy sat at the dining room table with her homework while keeping an eye on the two little buzzsaws racing around the living room. It really wasn't [i]that[/i] bad watching over them. She was just irked at missing out on an afternoon with Nyl & Company. The twins were busy playing sheriff and princess: Trent repeatedly rescuing Trixie as she kept getting herself in various perils. They weren't even being that loud. And they were long past their ear-biting phase.\n\nAs Tracy watched them play, the thought she'd almost said during her first meeting with Nyl returned to her. She let the words come this time, to face them. 'They don't even feel like [u]my[/u] brother and sister.' She shivered at the admission, and realized she felt more sad than ashamed now. 'I feel like their babysitter. All the time. I mean, I love the little sprouts. They're sweet. And I think they love me too. It's just...' There was a connection missing. A place in her heart where, when she looked at them, there should have been a feeling there that wasn't.\n\n'Just like I don't feel like Mom and Dad's daughter anymore. I feel like the maid. We've got two maids here: Candice and me. It's just that she goes home at the end of her shift and I don't.'\n\nIt wasn't even that she felt overworked. Not like some whiny kid who thinks her parents treat her like Cinderella. She didn't mind washing dishes or vacuuming. She minded that, sometimes it felt like Mom told her to do these things because she couldn't think of anything else to do with her.\n\nTrixie was starting to climb the china cabinet.\n\nTracy leapt up. \"Hey, hey, HEY!!\"\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\nWhen she woke that Saturday morning, Tracy had decided something within herself. She did not speak it aloud. She felt selfish and horrible and ungrateful about it, but that didn't stop it from being true.\n\nShe got up, tossed off her pajamas, got dressed, gargled mouthwash, and went downstairs to breakfast.\n\n\"Hey Mom, I forgot to tell you, I uh, got invited to a sleepover yesterday. Is that cool with you?\"\n\nMom wrinkled her nose. She shot a look to Dad, who seemed bewildered to be expected to have an opinion on the subject. \"Well it's very nice of you, Tracy, to spring these kinds of plans on me last minute. Did you forget about the salon? We were supposed to have family togetherness this afternoon.\"\n\nTracy cringed. \"I know. I'm sorry. I did forget.\"\n\nMom sighed theatrically. She spent a few moments weighing whether to drag her along anyway, or to be glad that at least the little shut-in was trying to socialize. \"Fine. When are you going?\"\n\n\"R-right now, if that's okay?\"\n\n\"Eat some breakfast first,\" Dad said. \"You're not supposed to run on an empty stomach, or something.\"\n\nTracy pulled up a chair and reached for the cereal. \"Thanks. Both of you. I, um, I haven't been on a sleepover before. This really means a lot to me.\"\n\nMom sniffed. \"I just hope you understand what I'm giving up by letting you go off like this. Have you got your phone in case of emergencies? You never seem to leave the house with it.\"\n\n\"Yes, Mom.\" This was in fact the reason Tracy had refused Mom's pressure to buy her a fancy new smartphone. She liked her relatively-obsolete music player just as it was, and also liked being unreachable sometimes.\n\nTracy filled her belly with cereal and juice, trying not to look like she was rushing. Mom was giving her the cold shoulder now, but that was acceptable.\n\nWhen Tracy got up to leave, she looked back. \"Thanks again. I guess I'll see you tomorrow evening. I might eat dinner there.\"\n\nMom waved her hand dismissively. \"Why would that be a problem? You don't seem to be interested in spending time with your family anyway.\"\n\nTracy turned away and did not let herself say aloud, 'Maybe you're right about that.'\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\n\nTracy couldn't remember a better weekend.\n\nAll her family frustrations were burned off by running. She soared past cars and mailboxes, letting solid beats erase her thoughts. But it did occur to her that her route to the mall was basically a giant right angle. That meant that if she could find a diagonal shortcut, she could shave off a considerable amount of time. Might mean cutting through a lot of backyards. She was probably at an age where she could still get away with that, right? Maybe she could look online for a birds-eye map. She wondered if there was a way to search for houses with guard dogs.\n\nArriving at Heaven Plaza, she decided on a whim to be bold and try a power slide into the gap between the boards. The result was a bit catastrophic. Tracy ended up with a banged knee, a skinned elbow, and a whacked forehead, all at the same time. Still, she was so glad to be here she got up and giggled, saying, \"Ow, ow, ow\" with every step she limped.\n\nShe headed straight for the fountain. She sang out \"Helloooo!\" at the top of her voice as she ran up the stalled escalator. There was a moment when she'd climbed up over the marble ring and was settling down into the dry, dusty basin where she got nervous that the illusion hadn't returned yet. She was just a little girl in an empty building right then. For a few seconds she was absolutely panicked that Nyl and all the ghosts had decided they didn't like her, so they'd packed up and left.\n\nBut then she felt gentle, invisible paws take hold of her shoulders from behind.\n\n\"Ready?\" Nyl whispered.\n\nTracy sighed in relief and melted at his touch. \"Mmm-hmmm...\"\n\nThen he was lifting her up, out of her body, and she opened her eyes to see a mall full of snow and smiling faces.\n\n\"[i]Hi, Tracy!!![/i]\" a bunch of them shouted.\n\nTracy said hi back, then turned around and stood on tiptoes to give Nyl a thank-you kiss.\n\nWhen she turned back, a handsome, fluffy-cheeked tiger boy was reaching out a paw to help her out of the hot tub.\n\n\"Oh, are you new?\" she asked, stepping down.\n\n\"No, I'm Kevin,\" he replied. He grew some ant mandibles just long enough to pinch-pinch them at her.\n\nShe laughed. \"You're going to have to teach me how you do that.\"\n\n\"Sure. We got time today.\"\n\nAnd they did. Tracy kept having to remind herself that they had [b]an entire weekend[/b] to spend together. Not just two measly hours. Nyl asked Tracy if she'd had breakfast already and if she wanted to share theirs. That sounded wonderful. Her run had built her appetite back up.\n\nSince this would be a sleepover, everyone was wearing pajamas today. Though Freddy still refused to wear pants, and Cassie the little exhibitionist had on nothing but a nightcap and bunny slippers, everyone else was sporting colorful, cozy jammies. Even Nyl! Tracy fretted at having forgotten to bring a pair of her own (she'd forgotten to bring anything, actually). Cassie let her know that it was no problemo. Where else was a better place to pick out a brand new pair of her own?\n\nAs they walked along, Tracy had another thought. \"So is fast food and bulk candy all you guys have to eat?\" That stuff was fine, but she thought it might get boring after a few months. Violet was happy to correct her. \"Nah, we've got [u]lots[/u] more.\" One of the department stores had a small grocery section, plus East Winds had some Oriental foodstuffs. But besides the food court, there was also a family restaurant and a coney island. The kids could magic up any meal anyone had ever ordered there, plus there were kitchens in the back full of fresh ingredients. And the bookstore had a whole shelf full of cookbooks for when they felt a culinary urge. \"I'm not too bad a chef myself,\" Violet said, \"but you've really gotta try Kevin's omelets and Saffron's smoothies.\" she licked her lips.\n\nIn fact, she got to try both. The family restaurant was located near the end of the west section (directly below Saffron's bedroom, which was probably why Tracy hadn't noticed it before). Poulo's was charming, with lots of real-looking flowers and comfy booths. Instead of Nyl playing chef, everyone found a seat and simply wished for their food. Hot plates of pancakes, scrambled eggs and bacon strips appeared. Tracy asked Saffron and Kevin politely about their specialties. While Saffron looked a bit embarrassed to be caught being good at something 'girly' like cooking, Kevin was already darting towards the kitchen to find some eggs. Tracy helped both of them out, chopping fruits and veggies. Soon everyone was eating together, talking with their mouths full and making plans for the day. Tracy heaped praise on the tiger and leopardess for the incredible reuben omelet and blueberry-nana smoothie. Cassie also insisted on sharing her french toast.\n\nNoticing that everyone was bombarding Tracy with suggestions all at once, Nyl held up his hands for a time-out and suggested they be democratic about this. The cubs already agreed that they wanted to watch a movie before bedtime, so that was set. In addition, Nyl suggested that everyone should pick [u]ONE[/u] activity they wanted to share with Tracy and write it on a napkin. He'd crumple them up, draw them at random, and each would get their turn. Tracy watched all of them scribbling in secret. Tybalt asked if she wanted to make any napkin suggestions too. The little 'munk was surprised. She told him that, honestly, she didn't mind letting everyone else show her what they enjoyed.\n\nThe napkins were collected in a cartoonishly large top hat that Nyl had produced. He gave it a shake, then poured the paper balls out in a line. Tybalt was first. Cassie was psyched about coming in second (though would have preferred first). Then came Freddy. Kevin and Saffron followed, which worked out beautifully because they'd both had the same suggestion. Then it was Violet, Bonnie and Eleanor. The giraffe moaned melodramatically at having to wait [i]all day[/i] to get her turn. Nyl wrote everything down on a big whiteboard, then whistled and sent it off to go rotate around the central fountain.\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\n\nSoon everyone's plates were empty and they were licking syrup off their fingers. Freddy and Kevin were comparing the roundness of their full tummies. Tybalt sheepishly told Tracy that his idea was pretty physical, and she might not be interested right after a big meal. Tracy rubbed her belly and said she thought she'd be alright. She was certainly willing to hear him out.\n\n\"I was thinking we could go grab some bikes from the scooter store and do a race. That sound okay?\"\n\nTracy lit up. She opened her mouth to say, 'Sure!', but instead a volcanic burp emerged. Everyone giggled and complimented it. Tracy hid under the table for a moment.\n\nFreddy and Cassie offered to clean up the dishes for everyone, and did so by gleefully frisbee-ing them into the kitchen with many loud crashes. The rest of the cubs headed off to Roll Call. It was mostly a shop for things with smaller wheels, but there were three nice bicycles hanging up behind the counter in red, yellow and blue. Tracy instantly chose the yellow one. Tybalt and Saffron pulled it down for her and explained its quirks. These bikes had been hastily-assembled show models after all, so they always needed a few tweaks at the start. Tybalt said that the department store (where he pitched his tent) had a lot of bike parts and accessories, so he'd built his own and custom painted it. But he'd use a stock one for the race to be fair. Tracy blushed a bit. \"I used to ride my bike all the time before the weather got goopy. You don't have to make it easy on me,\" she said. He smirked. \"Are you sure? I can give you a head start.\" She shoved him playfully. \"Don't you DARE!\" \"I can put some training wheels on yours if you want 'em!\"\n\nSoon enough though, Tracy was bashfully asking for a few practice laps. This bike was bigger than hers and felt 'stiffer'. Plus she was definitely not used to riding across smooth floors. Turning was precariously slidey. She made a few circles around the fountain while the others cheered her on. Once she felt confident enough, she turned around, skidded to a stop beside Tybalt and his blue bike, and asked about the terms of the race.\n\nSaffron and Violet were quickly dispatched to set up Wet Floor signs outside the entrances of both department stores to the east and west. Violet climbed halfway up the fountain-tower, then slid through the air to the top of the newsstand and took off with another swoop. Saffron avoided obstacles in her way by simply running along the wall sideways. Both girls got their markers set up and hollered back.\n\nThe rules were simple. Start inside Roll Call; shoot towards Granger's and loop around the Wet Floor sign; all the way across the mall to Five & Dime for another loop. The finish line was back at the store, with the added challenge of braking before crashing into the shelves.\n\nThere was a security sensor on the floor that would be their starting line. Tybalt got all set up and ready. He said normally he and Saffron raced, but the doorway was almost too small for two riders anyway, much less three. \"She'll [i]definitely[/i] want to take her turn next,\" he cautioned, while showing his eagerness to see their match-up. Tracy was a bit worried at that. Tybalt had been very helpful getting her bike ready and answering her questions. Saffron seemed more ruthless. Still, she was confident in herself. Riding a bike was nothing more than running with two wheels between your legs, after all. She looked around for a helmet that would fit her, then realized her mother wasn't here to make her put one on. She gripped her handlebars. \"I'm ready.\"\n\nThe other cubs were all seated around the marble fountain ring in anticipation. Eleanor and Bonnie were sharing popcorn. Nyl stood beside Roll Call's entrance and magic'd up a whistle. When the competitors were ready, he gave it a blast.\n\n[i]GO![/i]\n\nThe first race was a rout. Tracy knew it almost from the start. She'd caught a brief lucky break when Tybalt snagged an antler on the doorframe, but after that he took off like a greased bullet. Tracy punched the pedals but just couldn't keep up. She saw Tybalt's white tail bobbing in front of her the entire time, which would have been a much more pleasant sight if it hadn't meant she was losing. At Granger's, Tybalt pulled off a nearly-suicidal turn, so tight his knee almost scraped the ground. Tracy took it much slower for fear of skidding out. Though seeing Violet cheer for her did give her a boost. She at least caught up to him to bump handlebars on the next straightaway. Tybalt gave her a grin that asked, 'Enjoying yourself?' Her weak smile said, 'I'm trying to!'\n\nShe appreciated that he didn't throw the race just to make her feel better, but it still felt sucky to lose so much speed around the second turn. He was already dismounted by the time she limped into last place.\n\nHer heartbeat thudded in her ears. Tybalt put his arm around her shoulder and said she'd done a good job for a first try. And he really did sound sincere. Still, Tracy was miserable. Everyone saw her lose so badly. Part of her heart just wanted to go home right now.\n\n'[u]No[/u],' another part of her said firmly. 'I am NOT gonna be a wimp about this and cry and pout! That's for babies!' She rubbed her eyes with her paws, got her breath under control, and asked, \"Do you wanna make it two out of three?\"\n\nTybalt looked ecstatic to see her buck up and ask for a retry. The crowd cheered too.\n\nAs Tracy got her bike set up for a second go, she realized there were two big assets she hadn't taken advantage of. One was that she didn't have to be so timid. Her real body was sitting over there safe and sound in the fountain. If she did wipe out, it'd probably hurt, but there'd be no permanent damage. And two, she had a secret weapon. She popped in her earbuds and called up the TNT playlist. One song in particular. The most dangerous ankle-buster of the bunch. Throatpuncher by DJ Crruel. Its title was very accurate to what it felt like.\n\nTybalt looked over to check on her and was startled by the change in her body language. She really meant to kick his ass this time. He rather liked that.\n\nNyl counted down to three, then blew his whistle.\n\nTracy pushed play.\n\nIn the two seconds before the beat began, she let Ty exit the store first, not wanting there to be a jumble at the door. Once the way was clear, the song shoved a key in her ignition and fired her engine. Tybalt's jaw dropped at how fast she passed him. Violet was up ahead shouting encouragement. Tracy thought her heart might explode. She could hear absolutely nothing but the most toxic bass in the universe. Beats grabbed her legs and pumped them up and down whether she liked it or not. She was at the first marker in seconds, not letting herself be terrified by taking the turn at full-speed. The song was controlling her now, and she just had to go along with it. Though it was great to pass Tybalt going the other way and see his shocked face!\n\nDJ Crruel kept whipping Tracy's tail all down the straightaway to Five & Dime, where Saffron was punching the air and going nuts. Tybalt put on speed as well, realizing that this was a real fight for first now. Tracy didn't know how close he was, but didn't need to. All that mattered was that he was behind her, and all she needed to focus on was keeping her muscles from exploding.\n\nFor a heart-stopping instant she was sure the second turn was going to kill her, but she let her mind go and corrected her equilibrium on instinct. Then it was the home stretch. Up ahead she could see (but not hear) the other kids chanting \"GO! GO! GO!\" The scooter store was in sight. 'No permanent damage' she told herself, and let herself rocket straight through the doorway without braking.\n\nTracy was kind of glad the impact had knocked the headphones out of her ears, because she knew there was no way she could move to turn off the music. She was flat on her back in gobsmacked agony. Her bike ended up embedded in the drywall, rear tire still spinning. Merchandise was everywhere.\n\nThen everyone else flooded into the shop, looking both worried and astonished. Tybalt scooped the little shellshocked chipmunk up. \"That was [i]incredible![/i] Were you hustling me that first time or what!?\"\n\nTracy tried to make her eyeballs focus. \"So I won?\" Tybalt just grinned and gave her a congratulatory hug. That felt nice, and Tracy felt her adrenaline slowly subside. \"Uh... how about we call it a tie? I don't think I've got another race in me.\"\n\nTybalt said that was perfectly fine. She'd earned her retirement. Plus, as Freddy pointed out, her bike was in the wall.\n\nSaffron was pouty at not getting to race against Tracy, but understood that the chipmunk had burned her tank completely empty. Tracy was more than happy to sit on the sidelines with the others and watch the buck and leopard race a few times. Nyl conjured her a glass of water, which was much appreciated. All through the next races, the other kids kept leaning in to congratulate her. And while most of her still felt sore from the crash, that definitely made it worth it.\n\nShe worried about the store though. There was a hell of a mess to clean up. Although, at the end of the third race when a beaming Tybalt shook hands with a murderously grouchy Saffron, Tracy got up to congratulate them both and noticed that Roll Call was 100% back to normal. Yet no one had gone in and fixed anything. Her yellow bike was even back on display. She wondered if Nyl had done it, or if the illusion was self-repairing. Something to ask about later.\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\n\nStill a bit winded and wobbly, Tracy was not in shape for anything else physical (at least for a while). So when she heard Cassie's activity idea, it was quite a relief. The tigermouse was supremely overjoyed to get her turn. She deputized Violet and Saffron, and told Tracy that the three of them would be taking her over to Sparkledog Studios for a full-body fur-paint. That sounded lovely. The artistic-minded trio led Tracy towards the upper south floor, while Freddy headed off to set up his own activity, and said for Tracy to join him in Five & Dime when she was ready. Kevin shyly asked if he could tag along and watch her get painted. Tracy thought having an audience might be kind of flattering. Tybalt said he might join in later, but first wanted to try a few laps with his own bike for comparison. Eleanor said she and Bonnie had things to discuss at the bookstore. Nyl said he'd be \"around\".\n\nTracy got a little frazzled when she realized she was being taken to the tattoo parlor, but remembered this was not meant to be a permanent dye-job. Though Saffron did point out that her neon spots were permanent. Tracy asked how it was possible to tattoo a ghost. \"Simple. I just never want to change back.\"\n\nWhat followed was a wonderfully tickly experience. Tracy stood on a stool in the middle of the room while the other three girls all beautified her. They asked what look she wanted. She said she was fine with being surprised. Though she did recall her idea from the day before about stars and moons. Cassie said they could certainly work with that. She told Tracy to close her eyes, then she and the others got to work flitting around her, selecting colors and spritzing them onto their new friend.\n\nCassie kept up a constant stream of chatter while she worked, letting Tracy know everything about herself, about Nyl, and mall gossip in general. There were some things she was silent about though, and thus Tracy noticed their absence. Cassie hadn't said a word about how she or any of the other cubs had come here. Maybe that was something she'd have ask Nyl about later.\n\nIn the meantime, it was exciting feeling the other girls' fingers dancing all over her fur, smoothing it down in places or positioning her limbs to get the right lighting. Tracy kept her eyes closed almost the entire time. Not just because the overhead lamp made her see spots, but because she didn't want to risk a glance in the mirror. She wanted to get the full reveal all at once. It was quietly thrilling to put her trust in her new friends like this. She had to work hard to keep still when Cassie was doodling on her tummy, or when Violet tilted up her head to work on her throat.\n\nTracy opened one eye a little. \"You guys aren't just drawing a bunch of dicks on me, are you?\" she kidded.\n\nViolet replied in a perfect deadpan, \"No, Freddy's not here, remember?\"\n\nCassie laughed so hard at that she had to sit down on the floor.\n\nKevin did drop in eventually, after having gotten distracted along the way by a corndog urge. At first it was odd having him sitting there in the corner, grinning bashfully at everyone. But then Tracy thought it might be nice to give him a show. He had been a very polite tiger today, and had made her a very nice omelet. To give the others more area to work with, Tracy stripped right down to her underpants. Kevin clutched his armrests quite firmly. Tracy was blushing, but also pleasantly disbelieving that a boy could be so interested in a plain little chipmunk like her.\n\nFinally the three artists decided they were finished. Cassie still wanted to add a few more stars, but the others overruled her. This was just right.\n\n\"Can I look now?\" Tracy asked.\n\n\"Not yet,\" Cassie said. Saffron took Tracy's paw to lead her down off the stool, and gently guided her towards a mirror. Tracy shivered pleasantly at feeling the feline's little claws tickle her skin. Cassie was vibrating with anticipation. \"Okay, NOW!\"\n\nTracy looked. She gasped. She was amazing.\n\nThey hadn't just added some accents to her stripes. They had recolored her head to toe, turning her body into the whole night sky. Her brown fur was now nearly black: the color of dark chocolate. The tan and white on her face had become shimmering nebulae and comets. Stars twinkled all along her arms and legs. They'd even drawn the planets! She giggled when she found the moon on her booty, fittingly enough. And on her face, her right eye was now Saturn, encircled with golden rings. She wanted to cry it was so beautiful, but didn't dare to in case it made the paint run. \"This is gorgeous! It's more than I ever could have imagined! You did an amazing job!!\"\n\nCassie's smile was bright as the sun. \"Thanks! We get [u]lots[/u] of practice. I switch from stripes to spots to polka dots all the time. Sometimes I even change species, though with art, not like Kevin. He lets us practice on him too.\" The little tiger nodded eagerly. \"Tybalt definitely loves it, though he usually wants boring stuff. He doesn't let us get into outlandish colors. I think a hot pink deer would look cute!\" Tracy chortled. \n\n\"And my stuff's just practice too,\" Violet said, indicating the drawings all over her wings. \"These two have done whole paintings on me. Saffron's good at backgrounds and colors, but Cassie's amazing with fine details. Did you notice the satellite?\" Tracy looked, and indeed there was one orbiting her ankle.\n\nThe clock on the wall said she'd spent well over an hour being a canvas. Tracy hoped Freddy wasn't bored sick waiting on her to finish up. She thanked Cassie & Crew extensively again, really wanting to give them all big hugs but not wanting to smear her fur. Cassie said not to worry; this stuff dried quick and she'd be ready to snuggle soon enough. The chipmunk thought her paint was too good to cover up entirely, so she compromised and put only her shirt back on. She dashed off for the west section, leaving the others to decide what to draw next. The last thing she heard was Saffron saying, \"We already got out the black and the white. Why not make Violet a pirate flag?\"\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\n\nFive & Dime, Tracy reminded herself, was the department store [i]without[/i] the giant movie screen draped over it, and also the one Tybalt did not live in a tent in. She passed the bookstore on her way over and peered through to see if she could spot Bonnie and Eleanor. Yup; there near the back, the little skunk was reading on the giraffe girl's lap. Awww. Tracy stepped inside Five & Dime not knowing exactly where Freddy would be. The store looked entirely normal from the front entrance; full of ladies' fashions and blank-faced mannequins. Tracy hopped up onto a jeans display to see farther into the store. She saw perfume, watches, and the edge of menswear, but no platypus.\n\n\"Freddy? Am I late? Are you still here? ...Did you fall asleep?\"\n\n\"KNEEL BEFORE YOUR GOD!!!\"\n\nTracy shrieked at the booming voice and nearly toppled backwards off the display.\n\n\"Ha! Sorry, that was too good to pass up,\" Freddy said over the PA. \"C'mon up the elevator! I'll be waiting!\"\n\nTracy headed there, but also figured she might grab something along the way to wallop him over the head with.\n\nA smooth ride later, Tracy saw the platy boy standing like a showman in the middle of the department. He had certainly been busy.\n\nTracy at first thought he wanted her to admire his sculptures. He'd piled up gigantic mounds of TVs, toasters, coffeemakers, DVDRs, stereo systems, cameras and landline phones. There was even a stack of dishwashers that she didn't know how he'd managed to move. Freddy wiggled in silent anticipation as he watched Tracy try to puzzle it out.\n\nWhen she finally gave up and asked, he gave her a gleefully evil grin and, with a theatrical flourish, pulled away a tarp revealing a neatly-arranged row of lethal implements. A golf club, a baseball bat, a claw hammer, a sledgehammer, a crowbar, and a chainsaw.\n\nTracy suddenly got the meaning. \"That's it!? You just want me to smash stuff!? I can't! It's... it's...\"\n\nHe put his arm around her shoulder like a sleazy used car salesman. \"Why can't you? Who's stopping you? We've got the whole store all to ourselves, and noooo grownups. Haven't you ever wanted to? Look at all those TVs! How can you resist the urge? Something you'd get in SO much trouble for normally. But then... nothing's normal here, is it?\"\n\nTracy was tempted. Such destructive impulses did not normally occur to her. Good little girls did not smash expensive merchandise with crowbars. Though, didn't she sometimes want to throw her laptop out the window when the internet was slow? Once in a while, didn't she get so frustrated at school she wanted to take an axe to her desk? She looked over at Freddy and expected him to have little red devil horns. \"I mean, it's just Nyl's illusion. And it'll all reappear, right?\"\n\n\"Oh, absolutely. Just like the mess in the scooter shop. Kudos on that, by the way. Excellent technique.\"\n\nShe blushed. She looked at the tools and nibbled her lip. She reached for the hammer. Freddy was wild-eyed with excitement to witness her corruption. The cast iron head was ridiculously heavy, so Tracy had to hold the handle in both paws. She gingerly approached the nearest pile of goods, unable to resist checking left and right for security guards. She chose an innocent little chrome toaster as her victim. Raised the hammer to shoulder height. Then let it swing down and... [i]*ping* [/i]It barely left a dent.\n\nFreddy chortled. \"Naw, sister, not like that. Like this!\" With zero hesitation, he bent down and grabbed the sledgehammer, then swung it up and over his head like he was trying to ring the bell at a carnival. [b]KA-SMASHH!!![/b] Shards of glass and plastic flew like snow in a blizzard. Freddy giggled maniacally and went apeshit, causing hundreds of dollars in property damage with every swing. Tracy was horrified for a few moments. Then she started feeling envious of his fearless glee. She decided to try swinging the hammer a little harder.\n\nIt did not take long to lose herself in the complete and utter mischief of it all. No adults! No consequences! Nothing but the heft of the swing and the crack of impact. Tracy started to love the jangling thud of DVDRs flattening. And in addition to Freddy's mounds, there was a whole wall of TVs surrounding the department. Tracy made it her mission to bust every last one. It was even more fun when they were turned on! There were sparks and static and sometimes the picture froze on a fractured image. One time the screen got stuck on a newscaster's face, with his mouth duplicated all over the right half of the screen. Tracy laughed her tail off.\n\nThough she almost had a heart attack when a paw clapped down on her shoulder and a gruff voice said, \"Mall security, ma'am!\" She whirled around to see a goofily smiling tiger. \"Hi! Figured I'd follow you and see what crazy shit Freddy'd think up. Nice fur, by the way.\" Tracy thanked him and asked if they did stuff like this often. \"[i]Oh yes[/i],\" Kevin said. \"One time we laid out all the mattresses in the store and drove over 'em on a riding lawnmower.\" Tracy could only imagine the explosions of fluff and springs. Freddy popped up and reminded him of their adventures with the homemade gasoline-powered potato cannon.\n\nTracy and the deadly duo ended up destroying almost everything in electronics, until they were ankle deep in smashed bits. They didn't stop there though, indulging in a bit of refrigerator dominoes, and rolling washing machines and dishwashers down the escalator.\n\nWhen all three were reduced to lying on the floor laughing themselves sick, Kevin suggested that maybe it might be time to take a break. It was his turn after all. And Tracy had to admit, they didn't have much left to smash.\n\nShe asked what the tiger cub had in mind. \"Actually, me 'n Saffron were both thinking arcade, so we can head on over and do that, or if you had something in mind yourself, that's fine too.\"\n\nTracy thought a bit. \"Well, this [u]is[/u] a mall. There's lots I haven't seen yet. Why not some shopping?\"\n\nThat sounded fine to the boys. The arcade was all the way over in the south end anyway, so they could take their sweet time moseying over. Tracy knew she couldn't take anything home with her, but she could at least look.\n\nAs they walked together towards the escalators, Freddy asked if she'd had fun. Tracy said \"Absolutely!\", and thanked him with a hug for helping her lose her inhibitions. He said he was very happy to see her laughing and swinging away, and his only regret was that they'd forgotten to fire up the chainsaw. Tracy pouted when she realized it was true. \"Though we do have another problem,\" Freddy said.\n\n\"What's that?\"\n\nHe pointed down the escalator to the absolute cataclysm of boxy appliances at the bottom.\n\nTracy gawked. \"Oh poop.\" They had not thought this through. \"How do we make them, um, not be there anymore?\"\n\n\"Stop thinking about them,\" the platy said blithely.\n\n\"Oh poop.\"\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\n\nThey ended up having to hold hands and navigate the dangerous dishwasher terrain like mountaineers (which was better than Freddy's other idea of busting out the windows and rappelling down to the first floor on extension cords). Once they were safe on level ground, Tracy decided to take a detour through the girls' clothing section. Remembering that this was a sleepover, she found a really cute pair of green jammies with an oak leaf print. She took them to the changing room and announced loudly that she hoped no naughty boys would follow her and peek. She blushed a lot while she switched clothes, but enjoyed hearing muffled giggles outside the door.\n\nTracy could have run to the arcade in about two minutes, but instead they took a leisurely half hour. Tracy gave all the shops along the way at least a cursory peek. Her first stop would have been the bookstore, but a glance inside showed that one little skunk and one little giraffe had progressed from just lap-sitting. Tracy turned red and gave them some privacy. Freddy made a not-disapproving-at-all joke about it, and Tracy asked him if stuff like that was common here. \"Well, we've been toning it down a bit until we're sure how the new kid'll react. But she seems pretty okay with naughty stuff so far.\" Tracy didn't exactly confirm that, but she did smile bashfully and wonder how far the naughtiness went. In the next store down, a fashionable ladies' boutique, she amused the boys by modeling lacy undies over her pajamas. All three emerged with bra-hats.\n\nThe trio shared a basket of cheese sticks from a fast food place. They poked around the novelty shop, where Tracy was a bit alarmed to note how much of the stuff was \"adult\" novelties. She'd never seen so many dicks and boobies! She was about to ask the boys if these things ever got used, but their grins told her [u]plenty enough[/u]. Much more wholesome was the toy store nearby, which seemed like an outlet for Christmastime overstock. Plenty of fun stuff though, and it was electrifying to just rip open the packaging of anything she felt like. Tracy squeezed some plushies, sprayed some silly string around, turned on all the battery-operated animals, and had fun chasing the boys out of the store by driving an RC car into their ankles. Freddy had acquired a ridiculous pair of fuzzy red & green light-up deely-bobbers.\n\nTracy looked at the pretty pictures in the art store, browsed t-shirts in the darkened shop where all the teenagers hung out, tried on a few diamond rings at the jewelry store, then finally remembered that she wanted to ask Kevin about his shapeshifting abilities. He hopped up on the counter and tried to describe it. \"It's kind of hard to say. I just... want it. I was always pretending to be something else, even in kindergarten. So like, I guess the desire came true once I got here?\" Freddy was wandering around with jeweler's loupes in both eyes, bumping into things. Kevin tried to give Tracy a beginner's lesson. He put his paws on her cheeks and told her to close her eyes. Tracy was wary that this might be a lead-up to surprise tickles or a pantsing. But the changeable cub was quite serious. He asked her to picture something about her appearance she'd always wanted to be different. The stronger the desire the better: she needed to overcome the part of her brain that'd say this was impossible. Tracy focused on her buck teeth. Her big, silly, clowny, annoying buck teeth. As Kevin talked in a soft, hypnotic voice, she pictured them shrinking. Just a bit. This was her first time after all, she didn't want to get too ambitious.\n\n\"Take a look,\" Kevin said. He held up a small mirror.\n\nTracy opened her mouth, then opened her eyes. Unreality dizzied her. It worked! Her two front teeth were small and shapely, just like she'd always wanted! She ran her tongue all over them, feeling the difference. So much prettier! Just like Mom's! Tracy blinked. That thought kind of soured the moment.\n\nAnd for the first time, she found herself asking if that was exactly where she'd developed her dislike of them.\n\nFreddy finally noticed. \"Awwww,\" he whined. \"I liked 'em how they were! They were adorable!\"\n\nStartled, Tracy looked to see if he was teasing. Nope. And Kevin nodded agreement too.\n\nShe looked back in the mirror, then did a double take. Her teeth were back to normal. She hadn't even tried for that! She was left standing there discombobulated.\n\nKevin patted her shoulder. \"Maybe you didn't really want to change them after all.\"\n\nTracy considered that.\n\nOr at least she did until they got to the bulk candy store and the sweet smells filled her thoughts instead. They all sampled heavily, and soon ended up in a fistful-flinging food fight. Freddy also pointed out PixelBusters next door and said he'd have [u]loads[/u] of games to recommend later.\n\nBefore turning south, Tracy took a moment to check up on her body. Still sleeping. Still looking fine. She squoze her hands and paws a few times though, just to keep up her circulation. When she was satisfied and headed down the south concourse, Kevin was happy to show off his bedroom. Almost every surface, floor-to-ceiling, was crammed full of action figures. Tracy said she hoped there'd never be an earthquake. \"Actually that'd be fine,\" he said. \"Then I'd get to rearrange 'em all again!\" Up past the escalators, Tracy stopped herself from going in the music store, knowing she'd be in there so long they'd never get to the arcade. All those CDs... She certainly hoped she could find a way to get the songs on her music player. Completely on impulse, she whipped it out and swiped it through a pile of discounted disks. To her absolute astonishment, when she brought up the screen, it had worked. All the songs on every CD she'd touched had transferred over. She grinned with audio lust. \"Someone drag me away from here, quick!!\" she shouted. Oh, she would DEFINITELY be coming back soon! Kevin calmed her mania with a fresh hot pretzel from Kned's Knots, and Freddy ushered her into the Asian goods store. It had a nice, calming atmosphere, with soft koto music and incense. Tracy was enamored with the cute little Zodiac animal figurines.\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\n\nFinally they came to the arcade, which was unmistakably named [b]ZING-TOWN[/b] in glowing gargantuan letters above the entrance. It was dark as a cave inside, lit by all the blinking, beeping, zonking, tooting cabinets. Saffron was already there, whacking moles with a mallet so fiercely it was a wonder she didn't drive the whole machine into the floor. Tracy was left a bit dazzled, trying to look everywhere all at once. Freddy and Kevin ran to the token machine, which had been crowbarred open and a huge pile of gold was all over the floor. They started stuffing their pockets. Kevin brought over a double handful for Tracy, and Freddy ducked behind the prize counter to fetch them all a cornucopia of candies.\n\nSaffron's machine whooped and blinked her score. She noticed the others. She was panting hard and dripping, flushed with triumph. \"Oh, hi! Finally you got here!\" She pounced over, paused just long enough to admire her art on Tracy's fur, then gave her a big squeeze. \"I've been beatin' the hell outta moles waiting on you! I saw yesterday how you looked when I mentioned Dance Till You Die. Can't wait. And I'm already sweaty, so maybe you might have the thinnest, [i]tini[/i]est, most [i]microscopic[/i] chance of winning.\"\n\nTracy was a bit overwhelmed by the energetic kitty's sheer presence. \"Well I'll try as hard-\"\n\n\"Nah, you'll still lose.\" Saffron threw Tracy a 'chase me' wink and ran off towards the game, whapping her on the nose with her tailtip as she sped by.\n\nTracy felt warm. She did not understand why, but she kind of enjoyed being embarrassed by Saffron. She ran off through the maze of games to find her.\n\nIt wasn't easy though. The dance games were all the way at the back, past the basketball toss, the pinball machines, and those 'games' that existed purely to lure you in with unwinnable prizes to gobble all your tokens. Though Tracy realized that now she had the option to just smash open that glass dome and grab the Z-Scape 180 inside if she felt like it. Nah, she had a game to win. Or at least not lose too badly at. She wove her way through unending cabinets, all trying to get her attention with lights and sounds and gimmicky peripherals. Tracy saw the usual garish plastic shotguns and steering wheels, but also some maracas, a rubber chicken, and a huge squashy foam butt.\n\nSaffron was tapping her foot and twitching her tail when Tracy finally found her. \"SLOWPOKE!\" she shouted, grinning with those little fangs.\n\nBlushing and squirming, Tracy took her place beside the leopardess. \"Um, I've seen these before but I've never actually played one.\"\n\nSaffron popped in some tokens and sneered. \"It's easy. Arrows come down. Paws on arrows. Keep up with me.\" The game boomed to life, the brightness of the screen nearly blinding Tracy. \"And if you hold onto the bar you're a pussy!\"\n\nTracy squeaked. She'd just been about to.\n\nNeedless to say, Saffron annihilated Tracy in three out of three games. Tracy enjoyed every second of it. Her athletic legs had no problem with the dancing part, it was just getting the correct arrows from her eyes to her brain to her feet. Still, the challenge was fun, and she ended up as sweaty as Saffron. The leopardess had her eyes cemented to the screen the entire time. Never even looking at Tracy; concentrating wholly on being perfect. She moved like an engine piston. Like she'd spent whole nights till dawn practicing on these lighted pads. Tracy definitely got the sense that, while Tybalt liked competition, Saffron liked [u]winning[/u]. And that was fine. Her bully-ish demeanor was an obvious act, since she couldn't keep the, 'I really like you' out of her eyes whenever she trash-talked.\n\nAt the end of the third game, Tracy collapsed on the bar while Saffron spun in a circle, pumping her fists in the air. Tracy saw that the entire board of high scores was all S.A.F. over and over and over. \"You were really good,\" Tracy panted.\n\nSaffron ran in place, pointing at her. \"Yeah, and you LOST! Because you're a loser who SUUUUCKS!\" she hooted. She strode past, right through Tracy's space. Though she also spared a second to sneak a kiss behind the chipmunk's ear and whisper, \"Actually, you did fine.\"\n\nTracy got hot as a firecracker and followed after the leopardess' swishy tail.\n\nBoth of them took turns glugging from the water fountain until it was nearly drained dry. Kevin showed up to suggest another game, and Saffron said she'd graciously allow Tracy to have a break from getting relentlessly pummeled. The fighter jet game Kevin showed her was comparatively calmer, and it had a rocking cockpit you could actually [b]sit down[/b] in! Greatly appreciated! Tracy was surprised steam wasn't coming off of her legs. Plus the game was co-op, so that was a nice respite as well.\n\nTracy ended up playing a few rounds of a fighting game with Freddy (which she was pretty hopeless at), another game with Kevin involving runaway dinosaurs, then she shot some hoops with Saffron while the boys made bets. Basketball was at least a little easier than the dancing game, though Saffron still trounced her, and Kevin ended up losing 200 tokens.\n\nAfter her victory dance, Saffron suggested a racing game that she could continue kicking Tracy's butt in. But Tracy had another idea. She asked if she could get a lesson in wall-running. The leopardess squinted at her, internally debating whether it was better to show off, or to guard her secrets. Tracy asked if it worked at all like Kevin's face-changing. Saffron was impressed that she'd made the connection.\n\n\"Yeah. It's all about will, and getting over that part of yourself that thinks you're still alive. C'mere a second.\" She ushered Tracy out of the arcade to the edge of the balcony overlooking the lower floor. Not too far from where Tracy had made her tree-jump, which Saffron re-congratulated her on. Tracy wiggled. \"Now look. This whole thing's an illusion. Try to see it. Realize that we're just ghosts and Nyl's putting on a show for us. Try to see through it.\"\n\nIt was hard to concentrate with the softly-kneading paw on her back, but Tracy did her best. She tried to remember what the mall really looked like in its derelict state. She focused on Payne's down below, trying to see past the dance studio to the empty store. And it sort of worked. The illusion didn't go away, but she thought she could almost see the edges of reality beneath it. Like an image projected over an uneven surface. \"Wow...\"\n\n\"Allright. So if you can do that, then maybe you can convince yourself there's no reason gravity should bother us anymore.\" With that, she turned and ran straight at the wall behind her. Her pawpads gripped it as easily as the floor, and she went sprinting straight up to the ceiling, then all the way across the inner curve of the skylight to the other side. Tracy's eyes popped. She could only dumbly applaud as Saffron came sauntering back along the walkway.\n\nTracy looked from the arch of the ceiling to the bottom level floor. \"But what if you fell!? It's so far down!\"\n\nA shrug. \"I'd be okay. It'd hurt, but I'd be okay. Same as you on your bike earlier. I mean, you already get it; you've just got to trust it completely.\"\n\nThat was true. 'No permanent damage,' Tracy reminded herself. She walked back towards the arcade, where at least there was carpet to fall on. She stared at the wall.\n\nSaffron squoze her shoulder and whispered, \"You're not gonna get it on your first try, or your second, or your hundredth. You've gotta have [u]my[/u] tenacity. You've gotta do it without thinking.\"\n\n'Without thinking? I can do that!' Tracy realized. \"Is it cheating to use my music?\" she asked.\n\n\"Why would it be?\"\n\nSaffron stayed beside Tracy the whole time while she tried and tried and[i] tried[/i] to run up the wall. She even hushed Freddy and Kevin when they wanted to cheer her on. Saffron knew it took concentration to find the right groove. The right headspace. Tracy was giving it everything. No matter how many times the chipmunk slammed to the floor and landed on her butt, her shoulder, her ankle or even her face, she kept getting up and giving it another try. And to Saffron's amazement, she began to see improvement.\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\n\nAfter a while Violet showed up. \"Hello? I checked the whiteboard and it said Tracy'd be here.\" She didn't expect to find the chipmunk crashing into the floor from a vertical drop. Then she saw Saffron's 'get a load of this' grin and put two and two together.\n\nTracy wrenched herself up off the floor, aching all over. \"I got four steps!\" she croaked out when she saw Violet.\n\nThe flying squirrel helped her up. \"You mean up the wall?\"\n\n\"Uh huh! Only once. But I got three a few times! And that was after it felt like I couldn't even get more than [i]one[/i] for the first zillion tries!\" She dusted herself off. \"Aww. I smeared up you guys's paintjob. I'm sorry.\"\n\nViolet looked to Saffron. \"We can do it again whenever you like.\"\n\nTracy grinned.\n\nShe said goodbye to the boys, who were cheating at pinball; having Kevin stand on top and tilt it by surfing. Then Saffron broke a few ribs with her parting hug, and damn near made Tracy melt by leaning in and whispering, \"That was really impressive.\"\n\nThe little chipmunk was almost floating when Violet led her away. \"Exhausted?\" asked the flying squirrel. Tracy nodded. \"Yeah, you get that way hanging out with her. I was thinking we'd try something a little quieter. Wanna see the roof?\"\n\nTracy became [i]very[/i] interested.\n\nThey had a relaxed, friendly race to the central fountain and its looming climbing tower. Tracy probably could have won if her bones didn't hurt so much. Plus Violet did a lovely glide off the escalators. When they both caught up at the marble ring, Tracy did a quick check of her corporeal self, then shyly asked what it was like to be a flying squirrel. Violet shrugged as if she'd been asked many times before. She said the biggest differences between her and the others were envy over the wider variety of clothing they got to wear, and having to be wary of pinching her folds in doors or chairs.\n\nBodily, the two of them were fairly similar (apart from the wings). Violet was a little taller, with a wider face and no stripes. Her fur was like coffee with cream, and Tracy's was more of a russet. Violet showed off the skull and crossbones that Cassie and Saffron had indeed decorated her back with. Noticing the thinness of Violet's garment, Tracy asked if she got really cold in the wintertime. \"Nope,\" she said, \"I'm always carrying a blanket,\" and enfolded a giggling chipmunk.\n\nBefore they started their climb, Violet made note of what routes were easier or more difficult. She said the tower wasn't anywhere near as precarious as it looked, since she and Tybalt had both been all up and down it reinforcing the joints. Tracy started to climb. It was definitely wet at first, having to swim past the moat and ascend the slippery crystal columns. Tracy took her shoes and socks off and tossed them down into the water. Not only did they feel gross soaked, but she thought she'd get a more reassuring grip climbing nonev-style. The two girls' paint got streaky from the water. They were giggling and playfully splashing each other when they made it to the place where the fountain ended and the tower began. \"Sometimes I can make it here with a good strong jump off the popcorn stand. Not get wet at all,\" Violet said.\n\nTracy looked enviously at her wings. \"Do you think I could manage it? Like, with a bedsheet tied on my arms and legs?\"\n\n\"Freddy has tried,\" she said. \"He is [i]almost[/i] good at it.\"\n\nTracy didn't wanna guess how many broken beaks had gone into that 'almost'.\n\nViolet was a very good climbing coach, talking with Tracy the whole time as they got higher and higher. Pointing out handholds and giving her encouragement. Definitely different from Saffron! And for a gigantic pile of junk, the tower felt quite sturdy. Tracy did feel a shiver in her gut whenever she glanced down, but all in all it wasn't too stressful an experience.\n\nAnd when they got to the top, she had to take a moment to experience the pure awe. She could see [i]everything[/i] from up here! All four sections of the mall were laid out below, and everything was [i]tiny![/i] Her body looked no bigger than a stocking stuffer. She could see Tybalt having a walk 'n talk with Nyl and waved to them. If she squinted one eye, she could make it look like they were stepping onto her palm. And when Violet challenged her to, she really was able to jump up and brush her fingers across the cold, thick glass of the ceiling.\n\nBut the flying squirrel hadn't brought her up here just to see more of the mall. She led Tracy along a 'branch' of the tower and leapt to one of the balcony-shaped lighting alcoves. Tracy steeled her heart and jumped too. Getting caught in Violet's soft wings was quite nice. And there was a secret hidden door up here. Violet abracadabra'd a key and they ascended a cramped and creaking staircase in pitch blackness. Then Violet swung open a hatch that seemed to lead directly into the milky way.\n\nTracy emerged gawking. The stars had never seemed so bright before! She hadn't even realized the sun had gone down, but the moon was out and nearly full, and the night winds were merciless. Violet wrapped Tracy up tight and they walked across the gravelly rooftop. Tracy could see all the way down to the freeway. The taillights looked like racing jellybeans.\n\nThey sat down right on the edge, which made Tracy's heartbeat flutter. Such a long way down to the street! Though thoughts of falling soon made way for a new worry. \"Hey Violet... Are you guys, like, stuck in the mall? In ghost stories, the ghosts are usually doomed to haunt in a certain location forever. And would that mean...!\" She blanched as a horrifying possibility arose.\n\nViolet squoze her paw. \"Shhh. We're not trapped. Though we are tied to Nyl. We can only go so far away from him before we start feeling weak and lightheaded. But we go outside all the time. We play hockey in the parking lot.\"\n\n\"Allright. Still...\" Tracy looked down at her bare feet. The wind brushed her hair over her eyes. \"That means, if I decide to stay, it'll mean choosing between you guys and running. I'd still be able to go around the block, but it wouldn't be the same. I like to run for [i]hours[/i]. All different routes. It'd be hard to give that up.\"\n\n\"Then you should ask Nyl about it,\" Violet said consolingly. \"His whole life is making us happier. Maybe he could make you a treadmill that looks and feels like you're running all over the world.\"\n\nThat eased Tracy's fears a little. If Nyl could bring a mall back to life, he could probably make a magic treadmill too.\n\nViolet watched her expression, then smiled slyly, preparing to unleash a bit of a secret. \"I'm sure things'll work out fine. Though if you're still having worries, you could always ask Nyl to eat them.\"\n\nTracy cocked her head. \"Say that again?\"\n\n\"He can eat bad feelings,\" Violet said quite clearly. \"Or any kind of feelings. He manifests them, then slurps them right up. It's not like anything you've ever felt before. Very intimate.\"\n\nTracy blushed. Her mind was abuzz trying to imagine how he'd do it, and what emotions she might ask to be rid of if. But then something else occurred to her. Something that had been bothering her all this time about Violet's serene, perceptive smile. \"Violet, is it okay if I ask you something personal?\"\n\nThe squirrel's eyes twinkled yellow in the moonlight. She looked like she already knew the question. \"Sure, I don't mind.\"\n\nTracy cringed a bit, not wanting to cause offense if she was wrong. \"Are you... older, um, than some of the other kids here?\"\n\nA smirk. \"I might be. Maybe even older than you think.\"\n\n\"Oh.\" She thought that was as much confirmation as she was likely to get right now.\n\nThe enigmatic squirrel let go of Tracy, but only so she could scoot herself forward and let her legs dangle off the side of the building. \"Brr! Chilly on my toes!\" She motioned for Tracy to join her, and was heartened when the chipmunk did.\n\nTracy looked down at her sneakers twenty feet above the sidewalk. She wrapped her arms tight around herself and shuddered, but didn't scoot back.\n\nViolet approved, and rewarded her by enfolding her in warm fur again. \"Tell you what,\" she said softly, \"Ask me whatever you like. I'll keep some answers for myself, at least until I know you better. But I'll be honest about this right now: even though you chose us instead of Nyl choosing you, I already think you're a good fit.\"\n\n\"Thanks.\" Tracy leaned closer to rest her head on Violet's. Though just then her eyes popped open. \"Wait! Tell me that you're real! That you and everyone else isn't just part of the illusion! Because if Nyl can make a mall and a treadmill, why couldn't he make a bunch of kids too!?\"\n\nViolet felt the little chipmunk's heartrate skyrocket. She laughed out loud. \"Calm down, girl! I can't blame you for thinking that, but cross my heart it's not true. I guess I can't think of any way to prove it offhand, but do you really think he could keep up a puppet show like that all this time? Eight of us?\"\n\n\"Allright, yeah, that would be hard.\" She remembered at breakfast, everyone all talking across the tables at one another.\n\nViolet rubbed Tracy's back. \"I think all of us have had that thought eventually. You're pretty smart to come up with it so quick. I did. Cassie did [u]hard[/u]. Took us a week to coax her out of her room.\"\n\n\"Aw, that's sad.\" She could imagine the poor mouse curled up on her bed, refusing her friends' pleas because she couldn't be sure they were real.\n\nViolet started massaging in a circular motion, then eventually added her other hand. Just to be nice, she eased Tracy into a nice, long, slow backrub. She felt her fellow rodent's tensions ease, and eventually more questions and answers came.\n\nThey talked for about an hour on the roof. By the end, even though Tracy hadn't gotten many concrete answers, she still felt she knew Violet a lot better. Whoever the squirrel had been before, she was a considerate and attentive friend now. And her fingers were very talented! Tracy's back felt like melted butter. It was only the increasing bite of the night breeze that persuaded her it was time to go back inside. She remembered she was going to hang out with Bonnie next.\n\n\"How 'bout I take you right to her room?\" Violet offered.\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\n\nA few minutes later, Bonnie was bursting through the beads to investigate the loud [b]THUMP[/b] from outside. She didn't know what to make of the tangled, giggling pile of rodent fur on her doorstep.\n\nViolet elbowed Tracy off of her. \"Hey, I think I only broke [i]five[/i] bones!\" the squirrel teased.\n\nThe little skunk took this seriously for a moment, putting her paws up to her muzzle in concern. She looked from the two sciurids, to the top of the climbing tower, and made the connection. \"Did you...!?\"\n\nTracy beamed. \"Uh huh! I rode her down like a flying carpet!\"\n\nBonnie shook her head in an 'I could NEVER do that!' kind of way.\n\nViolet stood and stretched, made sure she hadn't actually fractured anything, then gave Tracy one more blanket hug goodbye. She said she was going to grab some dinner at Poulo's. \"Don't be late for the movie tonight!\" she sang out as she jogged off.\n\nTracy smiled at her, then was pleasantly surprised by a little paw taking hold of hers. She looked down to see Bonnie's big blue peepers looking up at her. The skunkette was dressed in a night shirt so huge it might as well have been a muumuu. She looked like she wanted to speak, but couldn't overcome her shyness. Instead she just gave a tug indicating Tracy should follow her.\n\nThey headed further south, down to the lower level. Tracy could still faintly hear arcade games being played above. It was kind of spooky to be in a mall at night without the noisy crowds of shoppers. But of course, 'spooky' was a perfect adjective for tonight.\n\nTracy thought Bonnie was leading her to the toy store, but it turned out her destination was the spa instead. Mother Water was decorated in ivory white and earthtones with cobalt glass partitions, giving the impression of relaxing along a riverbank. \"Is this allright?\" Bonnie squeaked.\n\n\"Sure! I remember seeing this place the other day and wanting to check it out. What would you like to do first?\"\n\nBonnie sparkled at being asked. She towed the chipmunk towards the massage chairs. Even with no masseuses on-site, the spa still had ways to soothe its customers. The chairs took cash, or at least they had until someone had corrected them with a hammer. Bonnie plugged them in and they started whirring. The girls both sat down and started murring.\n\n\"[i]Ohhhhh[/i], these are nice!\" Tracy said. Mechanical hands rolled her, pummeled her, squoze her and vibrated her. There were even mechanisms in the seat that massaged her booty, which made her blush. The chairs were close enough together that there was soon a skunk paw cupped around hers. Tracy liked that too.\n\nShe thought back to seeing Bonnie and Eleanor kiss in the bookstore. Her heart fluttered a bit. She considered mentioning it, but thought that might be a bit too much embarrassment for Bonnie to take. What else to make conversation about? They'd hardly said a word since the chairs started kneading them. \"Um... So tell me how you feel about Nyl?\"\n\nBonnie's eyes had been serenely closed, but at that they popped open in shock. She started breathing hard and fast, unable to speak.\n\nTracy was startled to see such horror on the little skunk's face. She quickly reassured her with a paw squeeze. \"Or not! It's okay!\" She suddenly remembered something Violet had said. \"I was just curious. But it's okay; you can tell me later if you want to, once you know me better.\"\n\nBonnie's expression changed completely, to relief.\n\nTracy smiled. \"Sorry. I just wanted something to talk about. But we don't have to, I don't mind.\"\n\n\"I'd like that,\" Bonnie whispered. \"And I do like [i]you[/i] Tracy. It's just hard for me to, um...\"\n\n\"Talk about stuff? It's allright. I like to be quiet sometimes too.\"\n\nBonnie's smile filled with gratitude for her understanding.\n\nAnd so, for the rest of their time together in the spa, they passed hardly a dozen more words between them. And that was fine. Tracy's day so far had been wonderfully exciting, and as much as she wanted that to continue, she didn't anticipate how much she'd enjoy slowing down to take a break. The massage chairs made her jiggle until her muscles were jelly. And when their cycle ended, Bonnie pointed to the aqua-massagers. At first Tracy had thought they were tanning beds. But Bonnie wordlessly conveyed that when you laid down inside them, they'd close and cover your back with a sheet of rubbery plastic, then strong water jets would pound against it. Tracy wasn't sure how this thing could keep from getting her soaked, but was willing to give it a try. Soon both girls were settled inside their tubes. The lighting and plastic sheet turned everything teal. When the jets came on, Tracy yelped. It was cold! But the temperature warmed up soon enough, and even though the sensation was nothing like anything she'd felt before, she soon came to love the water pulsing tension away from her shoulders, spine, tush, and calves. Truth be told, it was also making her spread her legs and wish the water could reach a little lower.\n\nTracy eventually heard cute little snorty snores and gently knocked on Bonnie's tube. \"I'm not sleeping!!\" the skunk shouted. Tracy giggled, and Bonnie did too. To prevent herself from dropping off again, Bonnie suggested they try something else. Just from her expression, Tracy could tell it was something she really liked, but couldn't bring herself to say. By process of elimination, and noticing how red Bonnie's blush got when she pointed to it, Tracy deduced it was the mud bath.\n\nThere was a small circular pool in the back, brimming with oozy, delightful sludge. It looked like the jacuzzi in the mall fountain, Tracy thought, or a great big gravy bowl. She looked back and Bonnie was standing there paralyzed between desire and humiliation. Fidgeting like the pee dance. Tracy wondered if maybe some of her embarrassment came from her species. As in, 'Ha ha the stinky skunk wants to get in the stinky mud'. But neither of them were stinky. The mud's odor reminded Tracy of outside after a spring rain, and Bonnie just smelled like clean, warm fur. Tracy decided to take the lead. She stepped out of her footwear, then let her pajamas drop to the ground. She gave Bonnie a beckon with her tail as she stepped in.\n\nBonnie joined her so quickly it seemed like she was in the tub before her clothes even hit the ground.\n\nThen there was a tensed-up, furiously blushing skunkette avoiding eye contact beside her. Tracy chuckled silently at her nervousness. Though yes, she was a bit nervous too. She was nude beside another girl, with nothing but warm, slimy mud between them. Tracy flexed her toes, feeling it squish delightfully. She laid back against the vinyl and let herself submerge up to her shoulders. And eventually, after a lot of hesitation, Bonnie sunk down too. Soon there were little toes tracing gently along her soles.\n\nThe girls relaxed so much in the lovely glorp that by the time half an hour had passed, only their eyes and noses were visible on the surface. It felt like being two strawberries in a bowl of hot oatmeal. Bonnie thought to open her eyes and check the time. She could juuust barely see the clock on the wall. She sat up. \"Hey. Um. Tracy? We've been here a while. Didn't you wanna go do stuff with Eleanor now?\"\n\nTracy thought of a wicked little joke she could insert there, but squashed it. \"Allright. I kinda don't want to get up though. I kinda wanna [i]live[/i] in this stuff.\" Bonnie giggled. \"And how're we gonna get our fur cleaned off?\" Tracy didn't like the thought of walking through the mall shivering and leaving wet footprints behind.\n\nBonnie made a, 'But wait!' gesture. She stood and slowly walked up the little steps to the mud bath's edge. As she did so, every last bit of the chocolate-brown muck slid off like oil on water. Her fur was dry and pristine.\n\n\"Cool!\" Tracy said. Then she couldn't resist snickering at the fact that Bonnie was now proudly showing off her birthday suit\n\nThe skunk gave an 'EEP!' and practically dove into her nightshirt.\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\n\nA few moments later, Tracy was very glad to see that Bonnie wasn't just going to slink back into her room after her latest embarrassment. Maybe it was because she was heading over to see Eleanor, but Tracy could hear little bare skunk feet padding along behind her on the echoing floor. Tracy checked her reflection in a beauty supply shop window: plenty of stars still sparkled in her fur and most of Saturn was still intact. She was impressed with all the fur paint had withstood so far. And the spa treatment left her feeling tingly and renewed.\n\nLike with the arcade, she could hear PixelBusters before arriving there. The air was full of, \"No no no!\" and \"Get THAT one!\" and \"[i]Yessss![/i]\" The store's two demo consoles had been hooked up to a spectacularly big TV. The whole place was practically wallpapered in game cases. In the center, Eleanor and Freddy sat in a beanbag pit, vehemently mashing buttons while Kevin cheered them on. On the screen, they were playing as shrunken heroes fighting off animate foodstuffs and cockroaches on a kitchen floor. There was a halo of spilled snacks surrounding everyone.\n\n\"Hi!\"\n\n\"Tracy!\" Eleanor boomed joyfully. She popped up and shut off the game.\n\nFreddy 'NGAAH'ed. \"I almost had the cheese!!\"\n\nEleanor rolled her eyes. \"We can get back there again whenever, beaver-butt.\"\n\nThe platypus sent half-kidding evil eyes at her.\n\nEleanor was bouncing on her toes to have Tracy join them. She scooped up the chipmunk's paws in hers. \"You're here! Ohmigod, I felt like I was waiting for MONTHS! I've got SO MUCH to show you!\" Her bubble burst slightly. \"Um, how much of a gamer are you normally?\"\n\nTracy winced. \"I probly played more today at the arcade than in the whole last month. I've got a tile-matching game on my laptop?\"\n\nThe giraffe looked like she was torn between anguish at having so much she'd need to explain, and elation at [i]having so much she'd get to explain[/i]. \"Okay... okay... Much as I can't wait for you to meet him, Baron Mind might be a bit much for a newbie. Plus it's a point-and-click and I doubt you've ever played one of those before.\" Tracy's blank look confirmed this. \"Oh! I've got a great one to start with! It looks a little hardcore, but it's fun and easy, I promise.\" She jerked her thumb at the screen. \"Not like [i]this[/i] one. It [i]looks[/i] all cutesy but it's actually BRUTALLY difficult!\"\n\nTracy had much to learn, it seemed.\n\n\"First things first! MOAR SNACKS!\" The energetic giraffe pulled Tracy with her into Sweet Thoughts next door, nearly bowling over Bonnie who was standing behind them. Elly gave Tracy a sack and commanded her to fill it with whatever she wanted. Tracy stuffed her sack while Eleanor gave Bonnie a squeeze and the skunk told her about their spa treatment. Tracy stuck mostly to chocolate and nuts, though couldn't resist the oddness of trying a gummy fried egg. It tasted indescribable.\n\nThen she was plunked down in a beanbag and Eleanor searched the shelves. Discs were swapped. Tracy saw the title screen come up: [b]Tachyon Sentry[/b]. She didn't even know what a tachyon was. Eleanor settled in beside her and began a mile-a-minute explanation. The giraffe was actually pretty good at putting things in simple terms, and Tracy realized she'd probably had to baptize some of the other kids into gaming. Plus she started them off in two-player mode and did most of the damage, which Tracy did not mind in the least. She'd never even held a controller before. (Tracy didn't actually have anything against video games though. They just never really interested her. They seemed so... stationary.)\n\nThough this game was pretty fun once she got the hang of it. She and Eleanor’s characters both had guns that could shoot a bubble of slow time. Great for stopping enemy robots in their tracks to receive a good beating, but the challenge was to not get snuck up on from behind while you were whacking another with the spark rod. Eleanor said, \"The game really starts once you get the upgrade that shoots [i]fast[/i] time!\" Tracy couldn't even imagine the potential offensive and cooperative uses for such a power.\n\nKevin left partway through their run to go mess with the projector, though he made sure to wish Tracy luck before he went. (\"Try not to die!\") Freddy split his time between giving pointers, discussing other games she might like with Eleanor, and doodling away on his own handheld device. Elly impressed Tracy with how many things she could concentrate on simultaneously: effortlessly dispatching drones and turrets while giving Tracy tips and noshing from her bag of candies. Tracy wondered how such a talky cub could be so close to nearly-mute Bonnie. Tracy sometimes glanced to the back of the store to see how the skunkette was doing. She was sitting on her own little chair, watching them, looking like a strange mixture of jealousy and pleasure, as if she was [i]enjoying[/i] being jealous at the giraffe and chipmunk sitting so close. Tracy decided to mess with her a bit. She gave Eleanor a swift kiss on the cheek. Elly thought it was in thanks for her expert tutorship and huggled Tracy vigorously. Tracy glanced back to see that steam was practically shooting out of Bonnie's ears and she had a look in her eyes like, 'Oh geez! Do that again!' Tracy almost had a hard time concentrating on the robots after that.\n\nEleanor glanced at the clock. \"Fast time's gonna have to wait for next time.\" Tracy was a bit disappointed. She was just beginning to get into it. But Eleanor said she wanted to at least show her one or two more games tonight. Tracy admitted she had no idea what she might like. \"Well, what do you normally enjoy?\" \"Music and running,\" Tracy said with a shrug. Eleanor scratched her nubby horns. Then an absolutely brilliant grin spread over her face. She cannonballed across the room into her beanbag chair and used the console to get online. Through some magic Tracy didn't understand, soon she was bringing up a game without even putting a disc in. \"Music and running, you say? Feast your eyes!\" Tracy was dumbstruck by what Eleanor had found. It was BOTH! Eleanor chose a song, then began the game and let Tracy figure it out. Soon enough she realized the game was generating obstacles in the road that her little jogging avatar had to parkour over to the beat. She even recognized some of the tracks from her music player, and put on Slide Into You by IH8Homework next. \"This is awesome!\"\n\nEleanor could not have been more happy at seeing the pure delight shining in Tracy's eyes. \"The best part of a hobby is infecting someone else with it,\" she said, and tickled Tracy a bit.\n\n\"Dooon't! I'll fall over a hedge!\"\n\nTracy ran through five more songs. It definitely wasn't like real running; more like coaching the little character on screen. Tracy was rooting on the little lioness lady, as if each button press was a pat on the back. Plus Eleanor revealed that there was a choice of avatars. No chipmunks, but there was a squirrel who almost looked close.\n\nWhile they still had a few minutes left, Eleanor went old-school and put Tracy into a simple platformer from the days when there were no curved edges. Tracy liked it well enough, though the other two games were more exciting.\n\nShe had just gotten the Cake Hammer when a bass chime echoed across the entire mall. Everyone else seemed to know what it meant immediately. They hopped up from their seats with excited smiles. \"What's going on?\" she asked. \"Wait. Movie time, right?\"\n\n\"You answered your own question!\" Freddy said, and gave her an affectionate bonk on the head with his flat tail as he skedaddled out of the store.\n\n\"Grab your snacks!\" Elly said as she shut the game down and clicked off the TV. \"Didja have fun?\"\n\n\"Yes!!\" Tracy burst. \"I admit, I wasn't sure at first, but I really did enjoy all the games you showed me! I guess you're gonna turn me into a big nerd too,\" she teased.\n\nEleanor grinned, and said ominously, \"I haven't even showed you my [i]anime DVDs.[/i]\"\n\n\"Oh no!\" Tracy squeaked.\n\nBonnie said she wanted to get more food, but she'd join up with them soon. She gave them a tail-swish as she passed, and ran out giggling. The remaining two girls headed east, towards the giant movie screen.\n\nEleanor seemed like the furson to ask about this, Tracy thought. \"Uh, I wasn't trying to be a snoop, but I saw you and Bonnie kiss earlier...\"\n\n\"Oh so you DID see us?\" Elly seemed quite proud actually.\n\n\"So, are you like, a couple?\" Tracy asked. She tried to convey that she didn't mind, just that she was curious.\n\nEleanor shrugged. \"'Couple' doesn't quite mean anything here.\"\n\n\"Huh?\"\n\nSmirking devilishly, the giraffe craned her neck close to whisper in Tracy's ear, \"[i]Everybody[/i] kisses [i]everybody[/i] here. And sometimes we do even more stuff!\"\n\nA mini earthquake of confusion, excitement, apprehension, and lust rippled through Tracy's young body. \"Everybody!?\"\n\n\"Sure,\" Eleanor said casually. \"And why not if it's fun? Hey! You two!\"\n\nFreddy and Kevin were discussing card games. They turned their heads.\n\n\"KISS!\" Elly ordered.\n\nWith no hesitation, both boys grinned and mashed their mouths together. Moaning, they caressed each other all over in the sloppiest, most overacted smooch ever. Freddy pulled his beak from Kevin's lips with an audible '[b]pop[/b]'. \"That good enough?\"\n\nEleanor looked over to Tracy, and not a hair on her furry body wasn't standing straight up. Her eyes were as big as dinner plates. \"Yeah, that was pretty good!\"\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\n\nTracy was still reeling a bit as Eleanor helped her choose a good seat. No mere uncomfortable metal folding chairs did the cubs set up, but a full deployment of comfy recliners from Granger's. Enough for all, unless they wanted to stretch out on the air mattresses that had also been provided. As soon as Tracy sat, Cassie leapt into the seat beside her and asked all about what she'd done with the rest of her day.\n\nTracy did tell her, but also realized with puzzlement that she hadn't run into Cassie the entire time until now. \"So what've you been doing?\"\n\nThe tigermouse turned pink and fidgeted. \"Um, secret stuff,\" she squeaked with a giggle.\n\nTracy thought she got the idea. Had she stumbled upon a secret hive of perverts? And would that really be so bad?\n\nTybalt had been indian wrestling with Saffron when he noticed Tracy's arrival. He let the leopardess knock him over, then skittered away while she was gloating. He waved to Tracy. \"Hey! So, if you don't mind getting up again, we figured since you're the guest, you get to pick the movie.\"\n\n\"Really? Thanks!\" Tybalt helped her up and she noticed his hands were like Eleanor's: small hooves for the first knuckle of each finger. \"That reminds me.\" She turned back to Elly, blushing. \"I know I shouldn't ask but... can I touch your horns?\"\n\nThe giraffe rolled her eyes. \"I [i]should[/i] be offended by that, but nah. All you non-hoofers want to. Go ahead.\"\n\nTracy 'tee-hee'd and investigated them. \"Oooh, they're fuzzier than I expected!\"\n\n\"Wanna try my antlers?\" Tybalt offered, leaning down.\n\nTracy felt them all over too. \"They're velvety!\"\n\nEleanor asked her, \"So, do you mind if I squeeze that cute little tail? It's [u]so[/u] exotic!\"\n\nTracy turned scarlet, but how could she refuse? She giggled nervously at how alarming-yet-fun it felt to have someone fiddling with her tailfur.\n\nTybalt shook his booty at Eleanor. \"Whose is fluffier?\"\n\nThe giraffe soon had two handfuls of fur.\n\nStill giggling afterwards, Tracy was a bit surprised when Tybalt led her over to the shoe store nearby. It was definitely the biggest one she'd ever seen. Aisles seemed to stretch for miles, and the cubs had been busy building shoebox castles with turrets and tunnels. But also, since this was the closest store to the projector, they'd scavenged the mall for every single DVD in the place, cramming them into the shelving units by the counter. Tracy almost went crosseyed. \"I have to choose from all of THESE!?\"\n\nTy shrugged. \"It doesn't have to be the best movie ever. Just, whatever you'd like to see.\"\n\nTracy started perusing. She had nearly settled on a family comedy she thought everyone would like when an eavesdropping mousie piped up, \"I've [i]seeeen[/i] that one!\"\n\nTybalt gave her a little shove. \"Shoo! Let Tracy choose!\"\n\nCassie snickered and skipped away.\n\nNoticing Tracy was near the anime, Eleanor suggested, \"See if they have Dekai Chinko Anterōpu no Rankoupaatii!\"\n\n\"I can't read Japanese!\" the chipmunk protested.\n\nEleanor grinned evilly.\n\nTracy went back to looking, but was soon distracted again by a lovely warm aroma. There was a commotion outside, and she turned towards the store windows to see Nyl riding up on a bicycle-mounted snack cart! The others clustered around him for hotdogs, popcorn and hugs. Tracy definitely wanted at least two out of those three, so she knew she'd better hurry up.\n\nShe'd known for a while now which film she most wanted, but had kept on looking to find something more crowd-pleasing. She turned to Tybalt for advice. \"Is this one okay? I mean, it's kind of embarrassing. It's for little kids, I know, but I used to watch the cartoon all the time and when the movie came out I was like, 'I'm too old for that!', but I always did actually wanna see it, and I don't know if the others-\"\n\nTybalt shushed her nervous babbling with a withering stare. \"Tracy?\"\n\n\"Um. Yes?\"\n\n\"I said you could choose. Whatever [u]you[/u] want. No one is going to mind.\"\n\nRelief shivered through her. \"Okay.\" Holding the case in both paws to her chest, she followed him out to the projector.\n\nHe glanced back over his shoulder. \"Besides, I used to watch Super BMX Buffaloes too.\"\n\n\"Really!?\"\n\nA dashing grin. \"Every Saturday.\"\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\n\n\nShow time. Tracy was impressed with the intricacies of the homebrewed projector, which made Kevin purr. Nyl was dressed in a vendor's apron and it smelled buttery when she hugged him. She happily pigged out on wieners and nachos. It felt good to be surrounded by yummy smells and muffled friendly chatter. Popcorn got spilled everywhere, but no one cared because it would all be gone by tomorrow anyway. And when the movie started, Nyl waved his hand and made all of the lights in the mall turn off. Everything was dark except for the screen and the stars. Magical.\n\nThe movie itself was a lot of fun for everyone. Tracy had underestimated the show's popularity. Almost everyone sang or hummed along with the theme song.\n\nAfterwards there was talk of a double feature, but a chorus of yawners defeated the motion. Each of the cubs suggested that Tracy could bunk with them for the night, but she knew exactly where she wanted to sleep.\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\n\n\"Nyl?\"\n\nA pair of orange eyes appeared in the darkness. \"Yes?\"\n\nTracy was a bit startled. With his dark fur, the fox seemed to materialize right out of the fog. But the brief shiver passed, replaced by a big happy grin. \"Hi! D'you mind if we talk before bed?\"\n\n\"Sure. But it doesn't have to be in this dreary place.\" He walked across the ash, leaving no footprints. \"And you're back in your body?\" He made a questioning 'erf' sound.\n\n\"Uh-huh.\" She'd traveled back to the fountain and slipped back inside before coming to meet him. She was pleasantly surprised at how easy it was, and also that she woke up to find herself still wearing the illusion of her pretty green pajamas.\n\n\"Any problems?\" he asked with concern.\n\nTracy stretched her arms side to side. \"I'm a bit achy, but it's not bad. Moving around's helping.\"\n\n\"No, I meant...\" He came close and knelt to touch her cheek. \"Is there anything wrong that made you go back to yourself like this? Do you want to leave?\"\n\n\"Oh [i]no![/i]\" she said immediately, and fell towards him in a hug. \"I just thought, y'know, like you said about the circulation? That maybe I shouldn't let my body stay in one place all night?\"\n\nHe patted her back. \"I would've let you know if there was any danger.\"\n\n\"I know. Just being cautious.\"\n\n\"Smart girl,\" he said, and kissed her forehead.\n\nTracy closed her eyes and chittered.\n\n\"So what did you want to talk about?\"\n\n\"Oh lotsa stuff.\" She tugged his arm, and it wasn't in the direction he expected. She pulled him deeper into the restroom, through the fog. He let her, but was puzzled.\n\nTracy paused for a moment when his true form became clear. The fungal spread of scar tissue throbbed across the floor and ceiling. She allowed herself a moment of unease, then shoved it out the door. This was Nyl. That was all that mattered. She walked carefully around the pulsing branches, right up to his anchored body. She looked up to where his face would have been if not buried in flesh. She gently brushed her fingers along his left wing.\n\nNyl shuddered.\n\n\"Can we talk here?\" she asked.\n\n\"I... suppose so. It is easier to manifest like this closer to my real self.\" He flicked two plain chairs into existence and set them up side by side, facing away from the wall.\n\nTracy surprised him again by silently, assertively, turning the chairs so that they were facing one another, and allowing an unblocked view of the nerve cluster.\n\nNyl stumbled a bit on his words. \"Tracy, you... I'm not ashamed of myself, if that's what you're thinking.\"\n\n\"I'm not. You said so already. But I also told you that I don't want to be afraid of you. Ever. I want this to not bother me. I want to show [i]you[/i] that it doesn't bother me.\"\n\n\"Allright.\" He sat down in his chair with a humbled smile.\n\nShe sat down as well, their knees almost touching.\n\n\"Did you have fun today?\" he asked.\n\nHer grin told him everything before she even opened her mouth. And when she did, a flood of happy memories tumbled out. Nyl said he knew of some of it, as he was always generally aware of events in the mall (and a small radius outside) through a sense that was almost like touch, but via thought. She asked if he could feel everyone's footsteps on the floor. \"Close enough.\" So Tracy filled him in on all the details that his 'radar' couldn't see.\n\nBy the end she was blushing at how much of it had been tinged with naughtiness. \"...So I guess that's the big thing I wanted to ask you about. Is it true? Like what Eleanor said. That you guys, um, kiss and stuff. All the time.\"\n\nNyl chuckled reassuringly. \"Well not [i]all[/i] the time! But yes. I didn't bring it up myself because I thought it might seem 'creepy'. I figured it was better to let the others spill the beans. But there should be no shame in physical affection with someone you care about.\"\n\nTracy nodded agreement. \"I've been noticing that. Like, it just feels [i]nice[/i] to get a hug whenever I want one! And It made me realize how much I don't usually get them at home. There's not a lot of touch there.\"\n\n\"I'm sorry to hear that. Kids and angels alike are social creatures. We need contact, for our overall well-being.\"\n\nTracy fidgeted. \"So like, what kinds of contact happen here?\"\n\nHe gave her a sly smile. \"Maybe it's better if I don't just [i]tell[/i] you? Maybe you should ask the others and see?\"\n\nShe blushed quite a bit, but was beginning to realize that blushing could be enjoyable. She remembered Eleanor kissing Bonnie. She wondered what it would be like to ask for a kiss from either of them. Or from Freddy and Kevin. Maybe both at once. Or Tybalt. Or Nyl... Not just a friendly peck on the cheek, but a [u]real[/u] kiss.\n\nThough a problem presented itself. \"How do you guys keep from being jealous of each other?\"\n\n\"That's a good question. We treat jealousy like a cold; something nasty to get rid of. It makes people sulk in silence when they ought to just ask for more attention if that's what they want. Sharing feels better if you can get past your emotions and relax in it.\"\n\nAt his mention of a certain word, Tracy remembered what Violet had said. \"And can you... Can you make that emotion go away?\"\n\nThe fox looked very surprised to be asked. \"You're not just randomly guessing that, are you? Someone told you.\" He looked mildly annoyed, but mostly worried. \"That was something else I wanted to ease you into knowing about. It made some of the other cubs uncomfortable at first.\"\n\n\"Me too, a little,\" Tracy admitted. \"But I trust you. So I'd rather ask about it than just be worried.\"\n\nHe smiled proudly at her for that and patted her paw. \"Good girl.\"\n\nShe turned her paw to take hold of his, and traced her fingertips along his palm.\n\nNyl looked up to the ceiling to collect his thoughts. The nerves in his corporeal body were pulsing slightly faster, though Tracy didn't notice. \"Let's see then. You already know that I get nutrition from souls, and you definitely seemed allright with that when I told you.\"\n\nA nod. \"I got a little bit swept up in the moment then, but yeah. I'm still okay with it.\"\n\nHe was glad to hear it. \"Sorry if I seem so reluctant about this. Again, this used to be much harder, and there's nothing I want less than to scare my chosen cubs. But it's true I can also feed on emotions. Before you ask, it's not permanent. You'll still feel them again, just not for the rest of the day. Maybe a few days depending on how much you let me drink.\"\n\nThe comparison to a vampire returned to Tracy's mind. \"And it's not, like, ALL emotions, right? So I'd be just a blank cardboard zombie afterwards?\"\n\n\"Well, not unless you [i]wanted[/i] that,\" he kidded. \"I can choose exactly which one to take, and you could help by feeling it strongly and guiding me to it. It's fear, usually. Or sadness, or rage, or heartbreak. Or like we said, jealousy. There's been times when our family couldn't get along, so the cubs at the center of it came to me and I helped them. So they could deal with the problem with clearer heads. Emotions can be helpful, but sometimes they can take over when we don't want them to.\"\n\nTracy nodded. \"And you can make that stop? How does it work?\"\n\n\"I would lean in close,\" he said softly, and he did. \"And place my paws on your cheeks.\" And he did. \"When you were ready, you would concentrate on the feeling, and I would help you bring it closer. Then I would pull.\"\n\nTracy was trembling. \"C-could you show me?\" she whispered.\n\n\"What do you want to get rid of?\" he asked, slow and gentle.\n\nTruth be told, there wasn't anything weighing terribly upon her at the moment. But she could remember times when there had been. Times when she was so angry she wanted to punch walls, or so sad she wanted to crawl in bed and never wake up. But she didn't feel either of those things right now. Actually, the closest she could think of was the one they'd just been talking about. During the movie, she'd seen Tybalt sitting with Cassie on one of the air mattresses. Sitting pretty close. And when he'd put his arm around her, Tracy had felt a flare of anger-soured envy. It was an ugly feeling. She didn't want to hate Tybalt or Cassie. So even if the feeling had been small, she still wanted it gone. \"Can you get rid of my jealousy?\" she asked Nyl.\n\n\"Easily,\" he said. \"Just bring it to the front of your mind. Let me get a hold of it.\"\n\nIt was hard to focus on something she wanted to let go of, but she tried. Nyl's eyes came closer and closer to hers until they seemed to fill existence. That endless, powerful orange, surrounded by glossy, soft darkness. Their noses touched. She could feel his breath on her lips. His hands were on both sides of her face exerting gentle pressure. His fingers spread her eyelids with the absolute minimum amount of pressure necessary. Tracy was letting herself fall into a complete unknown here, and it was exhilarating as well as frightening. It was hard not to let fear be her forefront emotion.\n\nBut she did her best to focus on Tybalt and Cassie. The deerboy's arm around the mouse's shoulder. Wishing that was her. Being angry at him for not choosing her instead. Wanting Cassie out of the picture. Awful, crawly feelings that her new wonderful friends did not deserve. Selfish feelings. Why should Ty just drop everything to be with her? Maybe he and Cassie were dating. Maybe he flirted with everyone, and he'd be glad to put his arm around Tracy too. The dark feelings started swirling with the bright ones, and Tracy suddenly understood why Bonnie might have enjoyed seeing her sitting by Eleanor. Maybe instead of jealousy, you could feel excited and happy to see someone you loved enjoying someone new?\n\nTracy was not sure if these were her own realizations or if Nyl was helping to take the jealousy away already. But then when he started, she [u]knew[/u]. There was no doubt.\n\nThe angel held his mouth open and inhaled. Tracy froze solid. Her eyes shot open, almost painfully wide. She felt like she needed to cry, urgently. But it wasn't tears that came out. Silvery strings of pure emotion emerged from her eyes. They glowed. They were wispy, like spider threads. As Nyl drew in a long, deep breath, the silver strands traveled across the space between their eyes, and were absorbed into his. As it happened, Tracy felt a pulling down deep in her being. Not her physical body, but in the essence of what she was. Her very core. Something dipped a finger in and removed something. Not much. Barely a scoop. It felt simultaneously like a violation of something sacred, and like the most profound release of tension she had ever felt.\n\nWhen it ended and the wispy strands disappeared fully into Nylsearis' eyes, he took his hands away from the trusting little chipmunk's face and let her recover.\n\nHer eyes stayed open. Her heart was pounding and her breath was fast. It felt exactly like the time she'd thought she'd looked both ways and hadn't, and had stepped out into traffic three feet from an onrushing car. She'd jerked herself back onto the sidewalk in time, but the intensity of horror and relief she felt afterwards had left her shaken for several minutes. That was what she felt like now.\n\n\"I only took a very small amount,\" Nyl said. \"I didn't want to overwhelm you.\"\n\nTracy wanted to snark 'that's an understatement', but she couldn't manage speech yet. She forced her hands to let go of the chair seat.\n\n\"Are you allright? I know it was intense. I've been told that a lot.\"\n\nNo lone word could ever do it justice, but 'intense' was close enough for a start. Tracy took a deep breath and shuddered. \"It was terrifying. But it was powerful too. I liked it. I almost wanted you to take more. Just take everything if I could keep feeling... whatever that was.\"\n\nHe nodded in understanding. \"I am very careful with it. It's the kind of sensation that could become addictive if I'm not. So far that's never happened. I never take more than I'm asked to.\"\n\nShe nodded, trusting his word on that. \"Is that what it'd feel like if you took my soul?\"\n\n\"Not at all, oddly enough,\" he chuckled. \"With souls, I can just absorb the energy that naturally radiates from them. It's like sunbathing, actually. You don't have to pull energy out of a sunbeam. But with emotions, I [i]do[/i] have to get in there and tug, so it's a much different experience. In fact, I'm even getting a little bit of energy from just sitting across from you now.\"\n\nTracy rather liked that. She smiled, picturing the charming idea of her as a tiny sun, burning brightly enough to warm him.\n\n\"Do you feel jealous anymore?\" he asked.\n\nTracy looked inside herself to check. When her mind's eye saw Tybalt's arm around Cassie's shoulder again, she was allright with it. It wasn't like anything felt missing from her. No alarming hole in her heart. As she looked at the mental image, her reaction could be summed up as, 'Good for them.' Though it also occurred to her that the deer boy had another arm to curl around two sets of shoulders with...\n\nNyl was very happy to see her pleased with the result. \"Anything else I can answer?\"\n\n\"Oh geez, lots!\" Tracy tried to remember all the questions that had been floating through her mind during the movie, though it was a little hard to recall them past her current fluttery feelings. \"Could you maybe tell me what's the deal between you and Bonnie?\"\n\nHe gave her a 'tsk tsk' look. \"I would never break a confidence. That's for her to tell you when she's ready. It might take some time, since she's not a skunk with a lot of self confidence. But that's something I'm helping her with, and that's part of your answer right there.\"\n\nTracy nodded. That made sense.\n\n\"Also,\" Nyl said with a sly smile, \"the reason she likes for me to make her call me 'Master Nyl' is very similar to why you liked Saffron calling you a slowpoke.\"\n\nTracy got beet red for a moment. \"Oh. OH! Okay, allright, I think I can understand that.\" She could not help a grin at the memory.\n\nThere was something else she wanted to ask about, but didn't want to make him break a secret. \"I was also curious if any of the kids here, maybe, aren't cubs anymore? Technically? You don't have to say who.\"\n\nHe gave her a 'nice try' smirk. \"I will say yes, but again, those are details you'll need to earn. I can at least say where most of them came from.\"\n\nTracy leaned in.\n\nNyl spread his hands around the room. \"I've been in this mall since before it was built. I've had followers for a very long time before that, but most of them are safe inside and dreaming now.\" He patted his belly. \"I chose here because it was becoming difficult to move around. Why not have people come to me? I spent my days just meditating, 'listening' to all the customers and employees who came through. When I sensed someone who had something they needed to get away from, I'd find a way to ask them if they'd like to come stay with me instead.\"\n\n\"So that's why I was different,\" Tracy said. \"I just showed up. But all the others, you picked them out specifically.\"\n\nHe nodded. \"Don't think you're any less special though. In fact, part of why I've been cautious with you is that I don't want to be greedy. When I first sensed you, you felt like such a perfect match I honestly couldn't believe the luck. I thought I was just overeager, what with us being all by ourselves here for so long.\"\n\n\"I felt that too,\" Tracy said. \"Like it was too good to be true.\"\n\nHe reached out to run his fingers through her fluffy headfur. \"Sometimes good things [i]are[/i] true. Though... and you may not like this part... if you are serious about joining us here, I'm going to have to make you wait a short while.\"\n\nShe wrinkled her nose. \"Why?\"\n\n\"I read in a book once that two weeks was a fair length of time to see if roommates are a good match for each other. With some of the others, I had to take them right away. Your situation is unhappy, but not urgent. So I'd like to see how well you interact with everyone once the 'newness' wears off.\"\n\nHer ears drooped. \"I think I know what you mean. Sometimes I'll get a gift and I'm really excited about it for a few days, but then the magic just 'poof's away.\"\n\n\"I don't think that will happen here. But I'd just like to be sure.\" He was glad that got her smile back. \"Plus, I want to make sure you have time to think about it. You would be leaving your family. Permanently. You need to really consider everything that's going to mean for you, and for them.\"\n\nTracy nodded solemnly. It was, in fact, something she thought she had decided already, but now wasn't so sure about. \"The other kids... you said some of them had urgent situations?\"\n\n\"Some, yes,\" he said sadly. \"I don't think Tybalt will mind me saying that he was one of those cases. I'm not sure he would have survived if I hadn't given him sanctuary. Eleanor either.\"\n\nTracy's eyebrows went way up.\"Geez! Should I ask them about it?\"\n\n\"If you want to. Both of them have made amazing progress. I think they'll be very open about it. Other cubs I've known, not so much. We all heal in different ways, at different paces.\" Sensing that the conversation was going to a rather bleak place, he tried to lighten it up with a small laugh. \"Heh. You want to know why this mall closed down?\"\n\nShe was about to ask, but then felt the 'click' of a lot of pieces falling into place. \"Wait, let me guess! So many kids went missing because you kept rescuing them, that people started thinking the place was haunted!\"\n\nThat got a much bigger laugh. \"Close enough! Some of them did. Some people thought there was a serial child abductor in the area, which was true in a way. Or they suspected gangs of satanists, snatching up cubs for sinister rituals. Whatever the reason, parents stopped bringing their kids here, and wouldn't let their teens come alone. Without kids and teens, a mall goes broke.\"\n\nTracy chuckled. \"Aw. I'm glad you helped so many kids, but I bet a lot of people were really bummed about the mall closing. People probably lost their jobs.\"\n\nNyl nodded. \"A lot of people did. I live with that guilt. But there's always consequences to our actions, and I think mine balanced out for the best overall. Sometimes it's justifiable to inconvenience many, if you save a few from their nightmares.\"\n\nTracy smiled in agreement. She looked up at his tortured form splayed on the wall, and remembered something he'd said earlier. \"Can you move at all anymore?\"\n\nHe shrugged. \"Some,\" he answered simply.\n\n\"But what if something happens to this building? What if they tear it down, or build something else?\"\n\n\"Then I'll think of something,\" he reassured. \"I'm not worried. I've gotten very good at my illusions while I've been here. I've surpassed what I ever thought I'd be capable of. Maybe if it came to that, I could convince the whole construction crew to just build around me.\"\n\nHe chuckled, but noticed Tracy hadn't. She was still looking up at the tangled knot that had once been his face.\n\n\"Tracy?\"\n\nHer gaze didn't falter. \"Can you hold me?\" she asked in a very small voice. \"I mean, in your real arms?\"\n\nHe was taken aback by the request. \"I suppose. If that's what you want...\"\n\nA nod.\n\nHe stood up and took her hand. When she was on her feet, he made the chairs go away. Tracy was still looking up in fascination at his other body. Nyl lifted her up into his illusion's arms, and felt her flinch in surprise when his corporeal arms moved. As slow as stone grinding on stone, they outstretched to accept her. The nerves pulled reluctantly away from the wall like roots from soil. Nyl placed an arm below Tracy's legs and elevated her into his embrace.\n\nShe did her best to keep still. This did not look easy for him, and she worried that she'd asked too much. She also wasn't entirely sure of why she wanted this. Those squirming nerves were repulsive to her sight. And she grimaced in disgust when she felt them take her weight. But they were something she couldn't look away from either. Knowing his mind was buried inside there. This 'monster' was where his gentle voice came from. Her paw rubbed along his shoulder. The meat was like ropy tree bark. Like living jerky. It was rough and bumpy and gnarled and mottled, but also alive and warm. There was a heartbeat in it. She could feel it thump-thump in every part of him. Like the beat of a song. It was soothing.\n\nShe turned back for a moment to Nyl's other face. Coffee-dark fur with orange tufts, and eyes as inviting and warm as a toasty fireplace in winter. \"Is this what you used to look like? Before?\"\n\n\"More or less,\" he said with a shrug. \"I added a few artistic touches. Not many.\"\n\nShe looked back to his real face. A red sphere of twine. She brushed her paw lightly across it, then looked back. \"Can you feel that?\"\n\nShe saw him shiver. \"Yes, Tracy. Thank you.\"\n\nShe turned back again. Looked at his true face until she was sure it no longer bothered her. It was not a normal sight, yet it was no different than when someone was born deformed, or disfigured in an accident. It wasn't their fault. And their heart mattered most. \"Would it be allright if I slept here tonight?\" she asked.\n\nNyl's illusion stepped closer and kissed behind her ear. \"I'd like that very much,\" he said.\n\nThen the illusion vanished. Tracy was alone in the ruined restroom with the silent, mummified remains of a living angel. The arms that were holding her up began to change. She looked around to see what they were doing, but didn't move or flee. The nerves writhed and uncoiled, changing from a pair of arms into something closer to a cradle. They wove themselves into a cocoon for her. Tracy gasped as she felt his warmth and heartbeat enfolding her from feet to neck. The nerves wound tight and pulled her closer, making a little nest for her to fall asleep in.\n\nWhen they settled down, Tracy was completely enveloped. Only her face peeked out, like she was a papoose, or living in a tiny igloo. There was a small bit of claustrophobia, but mostly she felt secure. It didn't feel like she was being held up anymore, so much as he had changed his statue-like body around her. His body felt relaxed now. He had set this up to be comfortable for both of them. He could hold her here all night long.\n\n'I wish it was longer,' Tracy thought to herself.\n\nShe closed her eyes and rested her cheek against his pebbly shoulder.\n\nHis heartbeat rocked her to sleep.\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\n\n\n\nPART THREE\n\n*~*~*~*\n\nThe next two weeks flew by in a blur. So many fun memories, Tracy couldn't keep track of which day they'd happened on. Devouring new music in the CD shop. Trying out the turbocharged, boneshaking kiddie rides by the west exit. Bobsledding down the escalators on vending machines with Freddy. Beating Tachyon Shift with Eleanor. Making a campfire with Tybalt right there in the sporting goods department. Saffron catching her fall after she'd finally managed to get six steps vertically. Discorporating in the jacuzzi one day to find her own face looking back at her; Kevin having pulled off a perfect impersonation. Violet teaching her how to make spaghetti and meatballs in the kitchen at Poulo's. Trying out Cassie's stripes for a day while the mouse painted herself up into a chipmunk. Reading quietly with Bonnie in the bookstore; having the little skunk open up to her bit by bit. And touring around the mall with the others as they discussed which space might become her bedroom someday soon.\n\nThen there were the naughty memories, and those were increasing in frequency. There had been the breakfast after her sleepover, when she'd shyly told her new friends about a dream she had where they all lined up and let her kiss every one of them. They had eagerly agreed to make it real. An awesome combination of jittery blushing and firecracker pleasure filled Tracy's tummy as she tried out each pair of lips (and one beak). There had been the time when Nyl had taught her about safewords, and how they could be applied to more situations than just sexy ones. The others taught Tracy all of theirs, and the word Tracy chose was Vandyke, her home street. There was the night of her second sleepover, when she had been invited to Tybalt's tent. She got to touch more than his antlers before they fell asleep. There was the time when Saffron had become overwhelmed by their shared sweaty musk playing Dance Til You Die and pounced the little chipmunk right onto the floor for some tickling and nibbles. There was the time Bonnie had stutteringly confessed that sometimes she felt like such a bad little skunky, she had to ask Master Nyl if he could please give her a spanking. Tracy could not help picturing herself asking Master Nyl for the same thing, or maybe giving Bonnie a hand herself if he was busy. There was the time she'd been bold enough to bike a few laps around the east and west sections wearing nothing but her shoes and socks. She also remembered hearing murmurs from the lower level restrooms one day, and peeking in to catch a glimpse of Eleanor enfolded in Nyl's body the way she had been that first night. It had not occurred to Tracy that other cubs might have made the same request. Whether her jealousy was still gone or not, she felt only happiness for Elly as she skittered away and left the two of them to their pleasure.\n\nThat was something else she had noticed. There were times when she'd go to see Nyl, and would find him sharing time with another cub. At first she had been disappointed, until a new way of looking at it occurred to her. He wasn't just ignoring the others because a new cub had come around. They were still his family, and he made time for all of them. Realizing that had filled her with a kind of contented joy. This was how love was supposed to be.\n\nOther secrets came to light. As Tracy spent more and more time at the mall, the other cubs began to share their stories. Some were nice. They had discussed over brunch the fact that this current group was not the full total of Nyl's followers. There were many more who chose to stay inside him, snoozing peacefully and being digested. Others rotated in and out as they felt like. Cassie had given Nyl's tummy a rub. \"My brother's in there!\" she said proudly. The others told her lots of stories about other cubs who were 'on vacation'. Tracy hoped she'd get to meet them all some day.\n\nOther stories were much more difficult to share, and to hear. Tybalt told about having to run the whole house by himself while his neglectful parents progressed further into abuse and alcoholism. Eleanor told about how she had been driven to death's door by an illness and a family that did not believe in treating it with 'scientific medicine'. They had all left behind similar miseries to find happiness with Nyl. Tracy listened and remembered everything, and shared lots of comfort hugs afterwards. One night in the arcade, she and Saffron had been taking a break from wall practice. They were sitting side by side, when the leopardess had pulled her close and made her swear to secrecy about how her grandmother had used to beat her with anything she could grab hold of, and how her family refused to believe it and made her keep visiting the old gargoyle. Tracy promised she would never tell.\n\nAnd all the while, Tracy became more keenly aware of her own home life. Things which had once merely irritated her now became nearly unbearable. She finally had the full understanding that families like hers were not normal. Dad in a robotic daze; living out the same actions day in and day out, referring all problems back to Mom. The twins were kept so busy being shown off to the other parents in town, they had no time to develop their own personalities. And Mom kept everything Just So, running the family like a movie director. Everything had to look right, and it was of no importance that none of it [u]was[/u] right.\n\nTracy knew things were speeding towards a change. Not only was she seeing a different side of her family, but they had noticed how much time she'd been spending \"running\" lately. They were starting to get suspicious, and Tracy was running out of lies. She could hardly stand to eat meals with them anymore. Mom's death glare felt like a heat laser burning holes in her back whenever she'd rush home and head straight up the stairs to her room. The house became a pressure cooker.\n\nTracy could not have been more ready when, on the afternoon of her seventh visit, Nyl had asked if she'd like to begin her devotions.\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\n\n\"Now, you understand that this isn't completely serious, right?\"\n\nTracy was sitting on the marble ring around the fountain, looking up while Nyl explained. The other cubs were sprinkled about, watching. Violet and Cassie had a box seat in the climbing tower. Tracy relaxed slightly, but there was still a flutter in her belly. \"Actually, I didn't,\" she told Nyl.\n\nHe caressed her cheek to apologize for any needless worry. \"They were supposed to be a surprise.\" He shot a look at Cassie, who put both paws over her mouth. \"Originally I thought them up to make cubs reconsider. A long time ago, I was still wracked with pain over whether it was right to feed off others, even if they agreed to it. I tried to make my followers go away so I wouldn't have to face that guilt.\"\n\nShe squoze his paw.\n\n\"But over the years I got better,\" he said with a smile. \"And weirdly enough, the devotions stayed on. I don't even remember where the name came from. Cubs seemed to like them, actually. So they became, I suppose, like an initiation ritual. And they aren't a deal breaker. I won't cast you out forever if you fail. They're just, something you can choose to try.\"\n\n\"But what [i]are [/i]they?\" Tracy whined, fidgeting.\n\nHe chuckled. Then he knelt down to eye level with her, fixing her with a gaze of playful seriousness. \"They're a test of your devotion to me, little one. How much are you committed to taking your place with us? Will you fight to be here? Will you willingly endure suffering, simply because I ask it of you?\"\n\nTracy's arms were shaking. She couldn't look away from Nyl's hypnotic eyes. The mention of fighting and suffering scared her, but there was also a part of her (that she thought Saffron would approve of) that wanted him to test her with any challenge he could conjure. She wanted to prove herself to him. To show how much this meant to her. That she was willing to do anything to change her life.\n\n\"I will,\" Tracy said, quiet but resolute.\n\n\"Good girl,\" he said back, and traced a fingertip down the bridge of her nose, giving it a 'boop' at the end. \"So then, kiddo. Let's get you back in your body and I'll show you exactly what you're in for.\"\n\nTracy turned around towards her snoozing self. \"Back in...? But...?\"\n\nAt this, the other cubs all got up and came closer to give her hugs and back-pats. They all had eager, knowing grins.\n\n\"You won't be able to see us, but we'll be watching and cheering you on,\" Tybalt said.\n\n\"Good luck!\" Cassie whispered to her from behind, then kissed her ear.\n\n\"You might even like them,\" Eleanor said with a naughty wink, and Bonnie nodded.\n\nTracy made sure to hug each and every one of them, then reluctantly stepped into the hot tub. She was facing the unknown. She'd thought this would be something she'd be going through alongside them. Maybe she'd have to eat a scorpion, or face a pillow-whacking gauntlet. She absolutely hadn't expected it to involve her physical body. She dipped a leg into her chest, let herself slip inside, then opened her eyes.\n\nShe was back in the real mall, alone except for Nyl, looking at the empty concourses and the cracks in the walls. Back in her own fur and winter jacket. (She had realized days later that she'd never actually needed to get undressed that first day. Nyl admitted with a chagrined smile that it had been a test of her inhibitions, and she'd passed beautifully. She wanted to be upset at him for such a naughty trick, but just couldn't.)\n\nNyl helped her stand up. \"How's the 'fuzziness' this time?\"\n\nShe wiggled various parts of herself, getting her blood back to normal pumping. \"Not bad at all. I hardly feel it anymore.\"\n\n\"Are you ready to start?\"\n\nShe looked into his eyes, saw no malice there, nothing but love and care, and said yes.\n\nNyl directed her to sit back down on the marble ring. He sat beside her, and turned her to face him, locking eyes with her. He held her paws up and wrapped his hands around them. \"I am going to change you,\" he said.\n\nTracy shivered. \"Like Kevin?\"\n\nA laugh. \"No, not like Kevin. I choose different challenges for each new cub, and I have three in mind for you. The first, today. The second, whenever you're ready to accept it. And so on. But I told you I can do more than just make illusions. I can change physical matter too. Tracy, will you give me permission to change yours?\"\n\nHeart thumping, she nodded.\n\n\"Good. Now relax.\" He held her paws tight, and began to inhale.\n\nAs a strange pull began to tug at her insides, Tracy thought at first he was going to take one of her emotions away. But it was not quite the same feeling. Similar, but distinctly new. This wasn't taking away from her essence, but her body. She didn't know how and could not speak to ask. Particles of her began to waft away from her form, inhaled by Nyl's divine breath. A steady stream of Tracy-dust. All she could see was his eyes. She did not know what he was taking away, but that orange gaze said to trust him and let it continue. She did. Whatever he was doing to her, she allowed it. The loss felt tingly. Little carbonated bubbles popping all along her face and tummy. Sand trickling through her fur.\n\nNyl steadily drew in breath until he had sculpted her just the way he wanted. He let go of her hands. \"Take a look,\" he said.\n\nStill captivated, Tracy felt all around her face and torso. Something was wrong, yet nothing felt missing. Though when she bent over to look down at herself, she knew what it was immediately. Her head weighed almost nothing! She grabbed it and felt the thud of her paws echo inside. She patted herself all over. \"I'm hollow!!\"\n\nHe giggled. \"Very perceptive.\"\n\nTracy tried to stand up, but her center of gravity was completely screwy. Her limbs still weighed the same; she could pinch and feel the muscle in them. But she had no more heartbeat, wasn't breathing, and when she pressed on her belly, her paw sunk inwards all the way back to her spine. \"My guts are gone!\" Alarms started going off in her mind. Dreading what she thought might happen, she opened her mouth wide and felt around with her fingers. There was her tongue, and her teeth, but when she probed further, absolutely nothing. She reached in deeper. Her sleeve bunched up past her wrist. Her fingers touched bone, and she realized she was touching the inside of her own skull. There was nothing inside it now but air.\n\nNyl was rapt in amusement at her reaction. \"How does it feel?\"\n\nTracy poked gingerly around inside her dome until she felt a squish. She had encountered her own eyeball. Oh that was TOO gross! She shrieked and pulled her arm out. \"YUCK! How the HECK did you do this to me!?\"\n\nHe rolled his eyes. \"Trade secret.\"\n\nTracy tried standing up again. The hollowness was severely messing with her balance. Each of her legs weighed more than her torso! And she was literally an airhead!\n\nNyl watched her take a few wobbly steps. \"Difficult, is it? I imagine so. Especially considering you have to spend the next twenty-four hours like that.\"\n\nShe spun around in shock. \"WHAT!?\" This unbalanced her and she fell forwards, to be caught in Nyl's arms.\n\n\"Are you devoted or not?\" he asked with a grin.\n\nShe turned pink. \"Well, yes, but...\"\n\n\"Did you think I'd make it easy on you? Did you think it would be simple? Until now, the mall has been your secret world, never intertwining with your normal life. The devotions always revolve around how well you can keep a secret. Or will you? It's entirely up to you to decide. But you're not changing back until tomorrow at this same time. So, have fun with it.\" He nuzzled noses with her.\n\nA whole day like this! How was she going to hide it from her parents? How was she going to hide it at school? How was she even going to be able to run home!? \"You're [i]meeeean[/i],\" she told Nyl.\n\n\"Yup,\" he agreed.\n\nBracing herself against his shoulder, she managed to stand up again. She poked her bellybutton and watched it invert to swallow her whole hand. \"But... How am I [i]alive[/i] like this!?\"\n\n\"Life is pretty easy for someone like me to manipulate. I know how it works. I could fold you up like origami, then smooth you out again, good as new. It's difficult to explain exactly how, but right now your body thinks everything's functioning normally, and I promise you'll be fine.\" He ran his paws along her sides, making her wiggle. \"And if you run into a situation where you'll absolutely be caught, like if you're taken to a doctor's appointment, you can bring yourself back to normal by thinking your safeword as hard as you can. Do you remember it?\"\n\nShe nodded, but didn't say it, not wanting to undo the change by accident. It gave her some relief to know she had an out like that. A safety release. Though she'd only get one, and it would mean failing the challenge. She'd have to make sure not to use it at the first sign of embarrassment.\n\nHe patted her tush to send her off towards the exit. \"I think you'll do fine. I cut your visit short today because I knew you'd have some difficulty getting home. Take it slow at first.\"\n\n\"Allright. I do have a few downtempo songs on my player.\" She popped her earbuds in, then couldn't resist backing up to feel his soft paw touch her hiney again.\n\n\"Naughty little chipmunk,\" he whispered to her, and gave her a kiss. \"See you tomorrow.\"\n\n\"See you tomorrow,\" she echoed, and headed towards Payne's.\n\nShe got eighteen steps before falling onto her face.\n\n\"Tracy!!\"\n\n\"I'm fine!\"\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\n\nIt did not take [i]too[/i] terribly long for her to find a running groove again. She was very careful to stick to level sidewalks, not wanting to risk another faceplant. She was also glad there wasn't much wind today; even the mild breezes were buffeting her balloony body back and forth. And she was [b]cold[/b]! She was really going to have to hustle it home. Her jacket insulated her, but there was nothing inside to retain heat but a great big wad of air.\n\nAt home the twins were throwing a fit over whether they wanted pizza or chicken for dinner. Tracy was rather glad for the ruckus, as it gave her an easy excuse to flee upstairs. \"I've got a headache, Mom. I can't take this. I'll come down and eat something later.\" Mom was suspicious, as she always was these days, but allowed her to pass. It was hard enough dealing with the two screaming ones without adding in the sullen one too.\n\nTracy locked her bedroom door behind her. What a relief! She was home and safely out of sight. She wouldn't have to try to fake eating dinner in front of them. She wasn't even sure if she [i]could[/i] eat like this. First things first, she littered her floor with clothes and stood in front of her mirror undressed.\n\nShe turned to and fro. Even though she could absolutely feel her excavated-ness, it didn't show on the outside. There was still a layer of muscle beneath her skin, and she guessed her skull and ribcage were keeping her from going all floppy.\n\nGawking at the impossibility, she reached a hand all the way down her throat. Aside from her wet tongue, it was mostly dry inside. Like touching the roof of her mouth. When her fingers brushed the inside of her labia, the tingle blasted through her like a shot. She yanked her arm out and looked at herself, not daring to believe she had such a naughty possibility to explore. 'No, that's just... too weird,' she decided, but it felt like her body might change her mind soon.\n\nShe leaned closer to the mirror and opened her mouth as wide as possible. She could see all the way to the back of her head. It felt bizarre to be thinking without brains. She shone her desk lamp into her mouth and could see the glow leaking from the corners of her eyes! Tracy had to go lie down for a moment after that.\n\nIt took a few hours to wrap her mind around the strangeness of it all, but eventually her natural curiosity wanted to experiment. She'd always kept a small stash of snacks in her room for homework nibbling. She tried eating a pecan, and after chewing, felt it splat against her perineum. \"Eww!\" She reached inside with a tissue to clean it out. She swallowed a few more nuts and felt them bounce around inside. When she sat up and wiggled her booty, they shook like a maraca. Then one of them fell out of her cunny. Instant blush. 'Oh right. I was gonna do more stuff with that, wasn't I?'\n\nMaking absolutely sure her door was still locked, Tracy spent the next hour or so putting things in and taking them out of various holes. She was able to slide her whole pencil case up into her vagina, then push it out again from the inside. And she didn't just have to reach in through her mouth. Taking it slow at first, she was able to wriggle her whole hand in through the front entrance [u]and[/u] the back. She even tried it with both holes at once and gave herself a handshake in the middle. Soon all sorts of things were going up there. Her music player echoed awesomely inside her when she put it on speaker mode. Her pretty golden ornament sunk in with a '[b]pop[/b]'. One of her old 12 inch fashion dolls was no challenge, and she could even fit six big plushies inside at once. Then she tried two more inside her head as well. It felt equally silly and sexy to be devouring her soft pals like this.\n\nIn fact, it felt so good, she decided to leave them inside for a while. She did her homework while stuffed full of plush, and even fell asleep that way. In the morning it took her a few moments to figure out why she felt so weird. Then followed an incredibly intense session of pulling eight wrinkled-but-okay stuffed animals out of her various exits.\n\nAt breakfast she grabbed a protein bar and pretended to chew it, actually just biting it into chunks which she could let fall out of her pants leg on the way to the bus stop. School was a bit of a nightmare. Every class felt like she was in imminent danger of discovery. She kept her mouth closed as much as possible. When Mrs. Spang did call on her, she mumbled so much she was asked to repeat her answer three times.\n\nDisaster struck at lunch. Tracy took her tray and sat by herself. Fish sandwich and fries: good. Those were dry enough to 'fake chew' and ingest without much mess. But then Courtney and Marissa sat down next to her, and soon she was drawn into conversation about that one movie out now where you could totally see Keith Trudale's whole butt. Tracy followed along, nodding, aware the entire time of the little pile of fish and potato chunks accumulating in her bottom, hoping it'd all stay in when she stood up. And then without thinking, she took a great big swig of soda. Her eyes went wide as she felt it drain right out of her, all over the seat of her pants. And she'd been [i]so careful[/i] to fake her sips up to that point! There was only one thing to do. She faked reaching over to sample Courtney's ketchup and 'accidentally' knocked the whole can of soda into her lap with an appropriate 'Eek!'. Her two friends offered to escort her to the washroom and help her out, but she said she could handle it by herself and skedaddled. She left a few wads of soggy fry behind in the hallway as she ran, but thankfully no one saw it. Tracy spent the rest of lunch and recess swabbing herself out and drying off her pants. She even tried putting her mouth around the air-drier and having it blast out her bottom. All the rest of the day, it felt like her cheeks were little ovens of humiliation-heat.\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\n\nBut she made it back to the mall that afternoon with no one finding out, and it was much easier to run again by then (though when she opened her mouth wide, she could feel the wind pass through her ear-holes). In fact, she was beaming with pride by the time she turned the corner onto the woodsy truck road. She'd beaten her first devotion. She'd won! And she hadn't used her safeword, not even when she'd \"peed\" her pants! Coming up on the mall, she spotted Nyl waiting for her. She rushed over and hugged him, showing him she'd passed the test. Nyl swept her up into his arms and kissed her. And just for fun, he made her bones disappear. Tracy was like a giggling uninflated pool toy as he carried her inside to the fountain.\n\nWhen he released her from her body, she was a bit surprised to find she was still hollow. \"It hasn't been a full twenty-four hours yet, now has it?\" he pointed out.\n\nSo she got to spend some time showing off her devotion to all the others. Everyone wanted to pat her tummy and peer through her ear-holes. Tracy demonstrated swallowing a handful of jellybeans, then pulling her pants down and letting them skitter all over the floor. This got a fantastic reception. Soon there were all sorts of suggestions for things she could swallow. Cassie brought over an 8 ball, and soon Tracy had it spinning around inside of her like an inverse hula hoop. Freddy wanted to try squeezing himself all the way in and wearing her like a suit. Tracy did [i]not[/i] think she could stretch that far.\n\nOnce her time was up, Nyl returned her body mass with a long, passionate kiss. Tracy cherished every second of it. They all threw a party to celebrate her first devotion. Everyone ate plates of cake in the ball pit. Nyl had sworn them to secrecy for now about what all of their personal devotions had been, but it was heavily implied to Tracy that they had all been in the same general fashion: definitely humiliating, but also a lot of fun with the right mindset.\n\nNyl said she could take a day off if she wanted, but Tracy was energized. She wanted to leap into her second devotion right away.\n\n\"Allright,\" he said, \"but remember, you asked for it.\"\n\nA moment later, Tracy was missing her nose.\n\nHe had bent down to kiss it, and she'd thought it was just a sweet gesture. The pulling sensation lasted only a second. Then afterwards, she tried to breathe and couldn't! A gasp of surprise solved that problem, but when she reached up to feel her face, there was nothing but smooth fur from her muzzle to her mouth. She ran to the nearest storefront to see her reflection. No matter what angle she looked from, it was 100% gone.\n\n\"You said you thought it was too big,\" Nyl said nonchalantly. \"You're welcome.\"\n\nTracy was whipping herself into a panic. \"But I can't hide this!! It's not like the hollow thing! People are gonna SEE it!\"\n\nNyl smirked, and shrugged at her in a 'not my problem' way. \"Did you think they wouldn't get tougher each time?\"\n\nTracy was about to protest that, and she did pout a bit. But he had a point. These were called devotions for a reason.\n\n\"You could always just make it go away by saying your safeword,\" he teased.\n\nShe stamped her foot. \"No! I'll figure out something! Twenty-four hours?\" She prayed he wouldn't say forty-eight.\n\n\"Twenty-four.\"\n\nWell that was a small relief. Tracy looked back at her noseless reflection. Her face looked almost unrecognizable with her schnozzer gone. \"I'll figure out something...\" she said again.\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\n\nWhen the clerk at the drugstore saw the chipmunk pop up in front of the counter with her sweater pulled up over her face, he thought for a moment he was about to be robbed.\n\nInstead, in a nasal voice she asked, \"Where do you keep those little mask things you wear when you don't want anyone else to catch your cold?\"\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\n\nMom glared suspiciously. Something looked wrong about this.\n\n\"I was getting the sniffles today at lunch. The school nurse gave me this to wear until I was sure if it was a cold or just allergies.\" Her voice was a little muffled under the starchy white mask.\n\nMom squinted harder. \"You're feeling allright? No flu symptoms, god forbid?\"\n\n\"Nope! Just some sneezin'.\"\n\nShe wanted to interrogate Tracy more. This was yet another in a string of bizarre behaviors lately, but she had nothing to go on besides her gut. Still, she knew her daughter's face and something looked 'off' about it. \"You're not covering up a nose ring under there? The neighbors wouldn't stop staring till you left for college!\"\n\n\"No, Mom! I don't wanna get anything pierced anyway! That'd hurt!\" She selectively forgot to mention that Cassie and Violet had convinced her to try all sorts of piercings last Friday at the mall. She just didn't retain them when she went back to her body.\n\nMom relented and was wooed back to complacency when the commercial break ended. Tracy ate dinner in the living room with them to hopefully ease some of their suspicion. It was a bit difficult maneuvering her fork around the mask, but at least she could properly chew this time. Everything tasted bland though.\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\n\nThe missing nose turned out to be even easier to deal with than the missing giblets. That night after dinner, Tracy made a decoy nose from the pompon off an old ugly knitted ski cap. She glued it on the inside of the mask and that made her look sufficiently normal. It tickled though. At breakfast the next day, she'd sneezed and her 'nose' slipped up onto her forehead. Thankfully she was able to get it back down before anyone saw. (Or so she assumed. Trixie was momentarily paralyzed with confusion over seeing her sister's nose migrate, and would be performing experiments on Trent later to see if they actually did come off.)\n\nAt school, the respiratory mask did a good job of keeping people from asking questions. The other kids gave her a wide berth, hoping she wasn't contagious. Tracy made sure to cough every now and then to seem realistic.\n\nWhen she returned to the mall that afternoon, the other cubs all decided to join in and have Nyl kiss away their noses too. Soon there was a whole pack of smooth-muzzled cubs running around.\n\nFreddy said to Bonnie, \"Now you can stink as much as you like and no one will mind.\"\n\nShe shoved him into the fountain and he popped up giggling.\n\nCassie also decided to take advantage of everyone's temporary inability to smell and ripped a huge fart. Unfortunately, she forgot they made sounds. Blushing scarlet, she hid behind Nyl as everyone guffawed.\n\nWhen the time was up and Tracy got her nose back, she spent a while admiring it in the mirror. For a moment she was going to ask if he'd made it bigger just to tease her. But no, it was her old regular honker, same as always. And while she still wasn't fond of it, it was certainly nice to inhale and exhale through it again.\n\nShe turned to Nyl, \"Was this all just a plan to make me be okay with my big nose?\"\n\nHe looked innocent. \"[i]Are[/i] you?\"\n\nShe looked in the mirror again. A shrug. \"I dunno really.\"\n\nThis time they went over to the candle store to celebrate. Everyone got their sniffers back to smell the various scents. Vanilla, pumpkin spice, tropical getaway, new car, bacon, etcetera. Nyl again suggested to Tracy that she could take a day off, as the third devotion was going to be incredibly difficult.\n\nShe thought a bit. The last two days had been stressful. But she'd gotten through them allright. And the sooner she finished these tests, the sooner she could say goodbye to sneaking back and forth between here and home. Even if it meant giving up her running, she knew in her heart that any sacrifice was acceptable. \"Bring it on,\" she said, trying to sound brave.\n\nAnd so, several minutes later when she had said all her goodbyes for the day, Tracy stepped back into her body. Nyl brought her back to reality and walked her over to a mirrored wall, where he told her to close her eyes and stand still. Tracy felt the same tingling pull as before. He was dissolving another part of her, and from the location of the sensation, she had a bad feeling about what was leaving her. Still, it felt so pleasant, that alone was worth it. She wondered if this was what it felt like when a soul went to live inside of him for a while.\n\nShe opened her eyes at his command, and then stood there in disbelief for quite a long while. She couldn't speak. Could hardly blink. This was not fair. This was an impossible challenge. Her face was fine. Her body was fine. Her legs were fine. But starting at her shoulders, there were only two small, brown, furry nubs.\n\n\"I look kinda cute like this,\" she remarked. She was still a bit in shock.\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\n\nSince this was her most difficult devotion, Nyl had given her a couple of extra options. If she said her safeword, her arms would reappear for exactly ten seconds. Say it a second time, and she'd get five seconds more. The third time, game over. Mission failed.\n\nNow she was standing on her doorstep wondering if she was going to have to use up her first ten seconds already.\n\nOnce she'd regained her senses, her mind went to work trying to puzzle out a way she could spend the next whole day like this. For starters, not knowing if it was cheating, she asked Nyl if she was allowed to get help from her friends. \"You're allowed to do whatever you can think of to make it to tomorrow,\" he said. That was excellent. Since the other cubs were still around (just currently invisible), she asked if they could give her a hand. She saw them pick up her bracelet and tuck it safely in her pocket. Then at her direction, they tucked her jacket sleeves into her front pockets and used safety pins to make them stay. Next, they filled the empty arm holes with wadded-up clothing. Her jacket was just bulky enough to make the illusion work. Though whenever she moved, they bounced around pretty awkwardly. She'd have to practice with that.\n\nTracy glared down at the doorknob. Her house key was on her bracelet inside her pocket anyway. How was she supposed to get in!? It was freezing out here! Would she be stuck outside all night? She'd end up a chipmunk popsicle!\n\n\"Wait!\" She ran back to the driveway to check. To her intense relief, one of the cars was in the garage! Tracy went back to the door and balanced on one leg while lifting her other one up to knock as normal-sounding as she could with her shoe.\n\nDad answered. Even better. Mom had been giving her the eagle eye for a week now. \"Tracy? Don't you have a key? Did you lose it?\"\n\nTracy coughed. Hard. Dad jumped back out of the way. She was so glad she'd kept her sick mask on. \"I forgot my bracelet this morning,\" she said, then coughed some more. \"And I definitely have a cold! D'you mind if I just go right up to my room and skip dinner? I don't wanna barf on anyone.\"\n\n\"Yeeeah, go right ahead.\" He shut the door behind her.\n\nShe headed towards the stairs. \"Allright. Thanks Dad! Love you!\"\n\n\"Just don't give it to the twins!\" he called after her. \"I'll lose my mind with [i]three[/i] coughing kids in this house!\"\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\n\nTaking her shoes off took eight minutes. At first she tried kicking them loose, but the laces were too tight. Tracy was reduced to flopping down onto her bed and pulling them untied with her teeth. After that it wasn't too hard to get them off and let her toes breathe.\n\nThough, as she looked down at her shoes lying on the floor, she realized she'd have to put them back on tomorrow. Tracy rarely swore, but that realization was worth an \"Oh shit\".\n\nShe stretched out on her bed and figured the best thing to do would be to just sleep through as much of the time as possible. She was able to scoot under the covers, but it turned out to be impossible to fall asleep in her jacket. The water-resistant material made squeaky scuffling noises whenever she moved. Groaning, she sat back up and managed to pull the zipper down with her toes. She slid out, careful to leave the stuffing in place. She'd have to thank Nyl later on for the fact that the scarves and safety pins hadn’t poofed into illusion-dust as soon as she'd left the mall's perimeter. With her mouth, she draped the jacket across her desk. She supposed she could use one of her safewords tomorrow to put it back on. She had left her backpack at the mall: homework be damned. She wouldn't be sticking around to find out how much her grades would fall this semester anyway.\n\nThat thought put her back in a good mood. Tracy sat on the edge of her bed and looked in the mirror at her little stumps just barely poking out from her t-shirt sleeves. She wiggled them. They looked like potatoes. She felt the oddest kind of thrill seeing her armless torso. She looked like that Venus statue. There was something pleasingly symmetrical and streamlined about having no arms. She wished she could squeeze her stumps to see what they felt like, but of course that was a paradox.\n\nTracy slithered back under her blankets and pulled them up over herself with her mouth. She rubbed her stumps over the cool, smooth sheets. They were very sensitive. Tracy groaned in annoyance at having no hands to let herself enjoy this moment a bit more. Although she still did have her creativity. After a few moments of fumbling around (trying first to sit on her heel and grind, but she couldn't reach), she managed to get a pillow stuck between her legs. Then, snatching glances back at the mirror every now and then to wave at herself with her tiny truncated limbs, she pounded her way into three lovely orgasms until she fell asleep.\n\nIt was dark when she woke up. She glanced at the clock. She'd slept through dinner, all the way till three forty-three a.m.. She thought she could maybe go right back to sleep, but her belly and bladder had different plans. She was hungry. And if she didn't want to wet the bed in about ten minutes, she'd have to hotfoot it to the bathroom.\n\nThe good news was, everyone else was asleep. The bad news was, everything else. Tracy took her socks off before venturing out, knowing she'd have to use her feet for makeshift hands a whoooole bunch of times before this adventure was through. Feet did a pretty good job at turning doorknobs, though were not so hot at getting her pants and panties out of the way. After an epic struggle, while her bladder threatened with each passing second to just let go and flood the whole room, she managed to get her undies around her ankles and her butt on the seat. Just in time! She sighed in bliss as she tinkled. Never had a pee been more rewarding. Though as soon as she was finished, the question occurred: 'How am I going to get my clothes back on again?' There was no other answer but the direct one. Tracy had to lay down across the bathroom floor and do the shimmy. Her feet could only help to push. The rest was all fifteen straight minutes of manipulating friction. For a moment, she thought she was gonna pass out and they'd find her right here in the morning, pantsless and unarmed. And afterwards, getting up was a chore too.\n\nTracy made her way down to the kitchen, taking each step slow so the hardwood wouldn't creek. Once she reached her destination, she scouted around for whatever she could eat. Okay, there were some peaches in a bowl on the table. Out of season, and mostly for decoration, but they'd still do. Opening the fridge on one foot, she peered inside. There were some leftovers, but it was all messy stuff. The best candidates she could find were an individually-wrapped string cheese, a pudding cup, and the half gallon of milk. She transferred each one to the floor, then sat down.\n\nIt turned out to be kinda fun actually. Her own little secret moonlight picnic. Plus there was the taboo of doing something so naughty as eating food with her stinky feet. Her heart was thumping the whole time for fear one of her parents would come downstairs for a midnight snack, but thankfully the whole house stayed entirely silent throughout her meal. Tracy found herself feeling quite proud of her limber body. She was able to hold the peach with both feet and lean over to take bites out of it. And it only took her two tries to launch the pit into the trash with her mouth-cannon. She tried getting the wrapper off the cheese with her toes but that was a fool's errand. She just chewed it open instead. And for her pudding dessert, she held the edge of the cup between her lips and simply lapped out of it. Though she also couldn't resist slurping some off her toes too.\n\nBy the end, she'd been having enough foot practice by now to get the cap off the milk with ease. She took a long, refreshing gulp. Getting the cap back on was trickier, but she accomplished it. Setting the jug back on the fridge shelf, she whispered, \"Sorry if it's got a paw aroma tomorrow, everyone.\" Tracy put her trash away and went back upstairs to bed, very pleased with herself.\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\n\nWaking up the next day, she knew it was going to be a toughie. There was no doubt in her mind that she didn't want to deal with her parents, so it'd be easy enough to just take her time, then dash downstairs at the last minute like she'd gotten up late. And that worked out doubly because she was going to need that time to figure out a way to get her clothes back on.\n\nFirst she did her best to 'comb' her hair by bending over and swabbing her head against the pillow until it was at least all pointed in one direction. Then she looked at her shoes. She knew ten seconds was not much. Maybe not even enough time to tie both of them. \"Do I absolutely have to though?\" Carefully she lined them up, then stuffed the laces down deep inside. Getting her socks on afterwards took a lot of toe-pulling, and at least one use of teeth, but they were on. Then she wedged her feet in her shoes and hoped they wouldn't slide off.\n\nThen the jacket. This was not gonna be easy. She lifted it up by the collar with her mouth and brought it to her bed like a mother cat carrying a very jacket-shaped kitten. She laid it out on her bed, then tried to wriggle into it like a snake. By now she knew there was no way she was getting the zipper up without using one of her safewords. Still, she gave it a valiant effort anyway, leaning over almost far enough to bite her bellybutton, trying to grab it with her teeth. Eventually she surrendered. She sat up with the jacket balanced across her shoulders, and said, \"Vandyke.\"\n\nDo you have any idea how hard it is to zip up a jacket while both your arms are inside it?\n\nStill, Tracy managed. She got the zipper halfway up, pulling from the bottom, then got it the rest of the way with her mouth. She was no longer upset at having big buck teeth, as they made splendid zipper-handlers. She even had three seconds left to properly position her fake arms and make sure the sleeves were deep in the pockets.\n\nThen, [b]poof[/b]. Her arms were simply gone again. It felt like they'd turned instantly into air.\n\nTracy checked herself out in the mirror. Not bad.\n\nExcept she'd left her respiratory mask lying on her desk.\n\n\"Craaaaaaaap!\"\n\nShe had exactly enough time to shove her head through it and bonk her face against the wall to get it in place before it became necessary to gnaw open the bedroom door, kick it shut, then go flying downstairs.\n\nTrent was loitering in the kitchen. Perfect. \"Get the door for me!!\" she shouted. Being three, he didn't think much about the request. He just stared after his sister while she ran down the street with her hands crammed in her pockets.\n\nTracy was extremely glad that school bus doors opened automatically.\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\n\nOnce again the mask was useful in keeping people away. Tracy tried to look drowsy and miserable and cough a little every now and then. Doors were not usually a problem for her, since there was always someone else entering or exiting that she could squeeze past and not bother with the knob. She sat at her desk and hoped like heck it would be just another day of listening to the teachers drone.\n\nThankfully, she was a good actress. Her coughs became more natural-sounding and pitiful, and her first three teachers were content to let her follow along without asking anything else of her. Sometimes the other students stared, but it was an 'Ughh I hope I don't catch that' stare, not a 'That girl doesn't have any arms!' stare. When each period's bell rang, there was enough noise and bustle that no one noticed how her sleeves wobbled and made rustling sounds.\n\nThen lunchtime came. Tracy knew there was no way she could fake eating in the cafeteria, so she made like a spy and hid in the shadows while everyone else went past. Then she sought sanctuary in the library. A bit of luck: the doors there had push-handles. It felt kinda adventurous to be in the big book-filled room all by herself. She couldn't plop down a novel and peruse it, but she could read all the titles and the posters on the walls.\n\nIn fact, she couldn't see any reason not to spend the whole rest of the day in here. She found an invisible spot amongst the stacks and hunkered down. Waiting would be tedious, but it was less risky than going back to class.\n\nOr so she thought.\n\n\"Miss? Are you asleep? Are you even supposed to be in here?\"\n\nTracy was jolted awake. She'd fallen dead asleep with her back to the atlases. For a horrifying instant she thought that the voice was the principal. Instead it was the assistant librarian. Not as bad, but not good either. The bat lady leaned down to take hold of Tracy's arm, and the little chipmunk impressed herself with how quickly she leapt to her feet and out of the way. \"I'm sorry!\"\n\nThe bat looked her up and down, peering through her spectacles. \"This is a library. Not a bed and breakfast. Class has already started.\" She squinted. \"And do you have something in your pockets?\"\n\nAs she leaned in closer, Tracy came very, very close to shouting her safeword. 'No! Wait! Not until it's absolutely necessary!' She knew she might face and even more dire situation later. With microseconds to spare, Tracy fell back on a plan that had been working all day. She doubled over in a horrific coughing fit. The bat lady stumbled back and covered her ears at Tracy's sheer volume. Tracy coughed as if her life depended on it, till her throat felt like it had been rubbed with a cheese grater. There were tears in her eyes when she looked up. \"I'm sorry,\" she said again. \"I kept coughing at lunch. I think I'm really sick. I didn't want to infect anyone else so I thought I'd just stay in here, out of the way.\"\n\nThe librarian looked halfway between concerned and germophobic. \"That was very thoughtful of you, sweetheart. But maybe you should have gone to see the nurse instead?\"\n\nTracy sniffed. \"Yeah. I didn't think of that.\"\n\n\"Better still, maybe you ought to just go home.\" She gave Tracy a comforting pat on the back, while keeping as much distance between them as possible. \"Wait here for a moment. I'll write you a pass.\"\n\n\"Thanks, ma'am.\" Score!\n\nThough when Tracy watched the nice librarian trot off towards her desk, a dooming thought came upon her. [i]She'd have to take the pass.[/i] She was suddenly very glad she hadn't used her five seconds. Though what would happen if she did? Would her arms pop into existence inside of her sleeves or underneath them?\n\nThe bat was now approaching, holding out a little slip of yellow paper. \"Here we are. Just take this to the office before you go.\"\n\nTracy's heart stopped. But then, in her moment of greatest desperation, a brilliant lie saved the day. \"Um, could you just tuck it in my back pocket? I, um, I sneezed on my hands.\"\n\n\"Oh,\" the bat said, grimacing. She very gingerly slipped the slip, then sent Tracy on her way with a \"Get well soon!\"\n\nHer 'I sneezed on my hands' trick worked at the office too.\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\n\nThen she was free! She had a brief bit of trouble chinning open the back exit door, but after that she was definitely free! She raced like a rocket down Mayes street headed east. She was delirious with relief. She'd gotten through the whole school day! That last part was kind of cheating, but oh well. She'd gotten out of the building and [b]still hadn't used her second safeword!!![/b] She was supremely awestruck at her own quick wit and good luck. In fact she was in such high spirits that it barely even bothered her when she tripped and went crashing into the sidewalk.\n\nPure reflex saved her from a chipped tooth or broken nose. She pivoted at the last instant and landed on her right shoulder. It stung like a banshee. She licked her lips to make sure everything was still intact and tasted a bit of blood. A cut lip. Not too bad.\n\nA passing badger gentleman saw her struggling to get up. \"Hey! You allright?\"\n\n\"I'll be okay, thanks!\" She vaulted upright acrobatically and sped off, but thought it was very nice of him to ask.\n\nThe badger thought that her dangling right sleeve probably explained why she'd fallen in the first place.\n\nTracy became aware of the flaw in her disguise a few minutes later, but did not stop to correct it. If she was fast enough, she could simply outrun anyone who'd be curious about it. Let them think there was an amputee girl with SARS on the loose. She had more important things to worry about than public perception. Destination: Mall.\n\nNyl was waiting for her outside again. He met her halfway across the parking lot, rushing in for a hug. She was panting, having run so hard she was sweaty in the late November cold.\n\nHe nuzzled into her hair. \"You're early! I thought my radar was going bonkers when it told me you were on the way.\"\n\nIt took a few tries to get the words out. \"I faked sick. Left school. Early. I did it though! I made it! The whole day! And I only used ONE safeword!\"\n\nNyl was astonished. \"Tracy, you're incredible! I made this one as hard as I could! I honestly didn't expect you to beat it! I was going to give you a big hug and tell you that you'd shown plenty of devotion just trying, and we'd have a party to celebrate anyway. But... you've knocked my socks off!\"\n\nShe giggled and closed her eyes and squeezed herself as tight to him as she could manage. Her breath made white puffs in the air when she laughed. Her legs were throbbing and her shoulder still hurt and there were little drops of blood inside her mask, but she was here. She'd done it. She had shown her devotion.\n\nNyl leaned in closer to wrap his arms around and rock her slowly. He nibbled her ear. \"You are amazing,\" he told her with every ounce of his sincerity.\n\nShe murred, drinking in his warmth, his voice, his comfort. She looked up with a playful twinkle. \"Can we still have that party celebration even though I didn't lose?\"\n\nHe belly-laughed. \"Course not! We'll have an even [i]bigger[b] [/b][/i]one!\" He scooped her into his arms with one smooth gesture, making her giggle in delight. He carried her back towards the mall. Leaning in to nuzzle her nose, he began to transfer back her mass.\n\n\"Hey!\" she said. \"It hasn't been a full twenty-four yet!\"\n\nHe grinned proudly. \"How dumb of me. You are completely correct.\"\n\nTracy nodded. She would see her devotion all the way to its finish. Plus, she figured the other cubs would get a kick out of ogling her nubs.\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\n\nTracy woke up the next morning before her alarm. She rolled over onto her back and just luxuriated in that heavy, golden, post-sleep bliss. Sunlight shone through her window. Her plushies were warm and snuggly. She wouldn't have to bring them with her when she left; Nyl had assured her that, just like all the goods in the mall, she would bring with her anything that she carried in her memories.\n\nShe was going to have her music player though, that was indisputable. One last run out in the open air with it.\n\nThey really had put on a wonderful party for her last night. Nyl had lifted her soul from her body to a tremendous cheer. She was absolutely bulldozed by hugs, and nearly fell into the fountain. Everyone was indeed fascinated with her stumps. She even let the other cubs rub them, which made her coo at the unique sensation. With a glance to the sky, Nyl turned the falling snow into confetti. Soon they were all up to their ankles in the colorful stuff. Cassie wheeled out a massive stereo system perched on a janitor's cart and the air bounced with tunes. Violet and Kevin showed off a cake they had made together. Kevin had drawn on it with icing: a stomach, a nose, and two arms. Tracy actually cried when she saw it. And since her time wasn't up yet, she happily let everyone else feed her handfuls.\n\nOnce she got her arms back, Tracy was so excited she tore off towards the south levels and replicated her Christmas tree leap. With the branches fully decorated, there was an explosion of sparks, flying baubles, and falling tinsel. Tracy slid all the way down in a hail of ornaments, landing on her butt in the pile of presents below, laughing helplessly. The others gathered her up on their shoulders and led the way to the food court for a saturnalian feast. Afterwards they danced and sang karaoke and rode bikes around in circles. Tracy even smashed some toilets with a sledgehammer.\n\nThe only bad part of it was coming home.\n\nTracy had decided to throw caution to the wind and stay out as late as she wanted. She arrived home, shivering from the night chill, at nearly eight p.m.. She paused on the doorstop to put her smile away. She had no idea what she was going to face once she stepped inside, but she knew that whatever it was, it would not get under her skin. This would be the last night she'd ever spend in this house. Nyl had said she could join his family whenever she chose to. Here in the dark on her doorstep, she was starting to regret chickening out on joining him right then and there.\n\nShe turned her key in the lock and stepped inside, cringing. Expecting a shout and a demand for her to get her ass into the livingroom this instant. Instead the kitchen was dark and silent. Light came from the livingroom, where everyone was gathered around the television as usual. Tracy squeaked out an inaudible, \"I'm home\" to no response.\n\nShe tiptoed through the dining room and peeked around the doorway. Everyone was just watching TV like normal. Had they not heard her come in? Maybe. Though she hadn't tried to hide it. The twins were lying on the floor, statufied with rapture at whatever CGI cartoon was on the screen. Dad looked half-asleep, and Mom was squeezed in next to him, looking pleased as a nesting hen. Tracy walked past them behind the couches, not trying to hide, anticipating whatever lecture was incoming.\n\nShe got to the stairwell without a word spoken to her, and somehow that felt a thousand times worse.\n\nShe turned around. Her mother's bottomlessly-smug smirk told her volumes.\n\n'What? Did you expect something from us? You're the one who can't make herself breathe the same air as her own family. Why should we care if you stay out all night?' She batted her lashes: the very picture of doe-eyed passive-aggression.\n\nTracy felt sick. She looked to Dad. He wasn't daydreaming after all; he was strenuously not making eye contact with either of them. 'This is not my problem.'\n\nTracy looked back at Mom, honestly wishing she'd get yelled at over this saccharine-drizzled cold shoulder.\n\nMom's face gave her nothing. Just a slight inclined nod that said, 'Go on now. Get up to your room. It's where you want to be anyway.'\n\nTracy opened her mouth to say something, but then stopped. She climbed the stairs in silence. Fine. They were just making her decision easier.\n\nTracy had gone to bed and stayed there. Now, with the new morning sun falling on her cheeks, she thought about Nyl's last warning to her.\n\nAs the party had been winding down, he'd given her a nod to join him and take a walk away from the noisy crowd. She followed. They sat on a bench outside a menswear boutique.\n\n\"You know you're welcome here,\" he said.\n\nTracy sensed a 'but'.\n\n\"...But I need to know for sure you've thought this through. For my own conscience. It's not that I don't trust you to know your own heart. I just have to hear you say it.\"\n\nShe nodded. \"Okay. I'm sure I want to be here.\"\n\n\"Are you? Absolutely?\"\n\n\"Uh-huh. I just want to belong somewhere. Even if it's in your tummy. [i]Especially [/i]if it's there.\"\n\nHe chuckled at the cute answer. Then he stared into the distance for a moment.\n\nSuddenly he turned and somehow loomed over her with nothing more than a shift in body language. He brought his full presence to bear upon her, transforming from an angel to a black-coated, orange-eyed demon. \"You are ready to give up the home you grew up in and the family that raised you?\"\n\nShe gulped, but managed to say, \"I am.\"\n\n\"You are ready to go missing, and break their hearts? And the hearts of all your friends at school? And everyone else who has ever known you and cared about you?\"\n\nShe winced. She closed her eyes, not being able to face his excoriating gaze. \"...I am.\"\n\n\"You are ready to give your very soul to me, to devour? To digest into nothingness if I choose?\"\n\n\"Y-you wouldn't.\"\n\n\"Wouldn't I? You've known me less than a season. How can you trust me so much?\"\n\nTracy turned her face away. \"I just... do. I do no matter what.\"\n\nHe persisted. \"You are aware I will share my love with the others? You will not be my special perfect princess, the only star of the show?\"\n\n\"I'm okay with that,\" she said steadfastly.\n\nHe leaned in even closer. \"You are aware what giving yourself to me will mean? It will not be a pleasant transformation like the others.\"\n\nShe was aware. He had told her in a private moment several days ago. The idea had terrified her then, and still did now. But the pain wouldn't last forever. It would be over much, much quicker than her devotions, and she'd persevered through all of those. \"I know.\"\n\n\"You understand that I won't be able to lessen any of the agony?\"\n\nShe felt Nyl's ragged, intense breathing puffing at the side of her face like a steam engine's exhaust. \"I understand.\"\n\nThe girl was trembling, almost on the verge of tears. \"You accept that you will be leaving behind your one and only life, and any chance you'll ever have to make it better, in exchange for a world of illusion? Fake tricks? None of it real?\"\n\nTracy had her eyes closed, head tucked down to her chest, leaning as far away from that volcanic hot breath as she could. But she didn't leave her seat. When she answered, it was with as much calm as she could manage. \"I accept. Because it [u]is[/u] real. You love all the other cubs, and that's real. You love me, and that's real too. And I love you. That's real.\"\n\nNyl changed back to a humbled, trembling angel in a heartbeat, and swept her into a tight, fierce embrace.\n\nThey held each other silently for what seemed like ages.\n\nFinally he spoke, and it was muffled by his muzzle pressed tightly against her collar. \"I am so sorry for that. I needed to. You are so brave, Tracy.\"\n\n\"It's okay,\" she said back, and kissed his shoulder.\n\nNow, a morning later in bed, Tracy remembered the warmth of that long-held hug. She pulled her blankets tight around her. When she had left last night, the last thing she'd said was, \"I'll be back tomorrow morning! It's Saturday!\" She looked at the clock and it was. No school. No more waiting.\n\nShe looked to her bedside table and saw a second sun. A little golden ball that she'd rescued. A ludicrously naughty whim captured her. She snatched the ornament off the table and tucked it into her pajama bottom. She took the utmost care not to shatter it, knowing exactly how bad of an outcome that could be, but she turned towards her pile of plushies and yiffed the living heck out of her ornament. So perfectly round and smooth. It was admittedly awkward to hump a sphere, but Tracy persisted until the deed was done. Her passion rose quickly, inflamed by the taboo of violating such an innocent symbol of holiday joy. Yet more importantly, it was a symbol of Nyl. Of him and the mall and her friends and every memory she had of them all together. Tracy rocked back and forth, kicking at her bedsheets, and climaxed.\n\nShe licked her ornament clean and inspected it for cracks. Not a one. And her honey was pretty tasty too. Setting her ball back on the table, she thought it looked a little bewildered by the experience. Truth be told, she was too. Even just a few moments ago she couldn't have predicted doing something so improper. But it was done all the same, and she couldn't deny she'd enjoyed it. Maybe soon it wouldn't be her ornament she was yiffing.\n\nHer covers were so comfy, she might have stayed in bed another hour. \"But destiny awaits,\" she told herself with a dramatic flair, and giggled. Tracy got up, stretched, put on a comfortable outfit, tucked her music in her pocket, and left her bedroom. In her hand was a note. She was going to leave it on the kitchen table. It would explain as much as she could tell without sounding crazy.\n\nDownstairs was deserted. Tracy went to the kitchen window. Dad's car was gone. She checked the whiteboard. Ah. The twins had swimming today. That made things much easier. Tracy took a moment to fill a glass with cereal, pour some milk on top, and drink it all down. Simple, quick, and refreshing.\n\nShe re-read her goodbye note, checking for typos or anything more she wanted to say. No, it was enough. No postscript needed. She turned around to take a last look goodbye at the house. She hadn't heard her mother come downstairs.\n\n\"What's that you're holding?\"\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\n\n\n\nFIVE WEEKS LATER\n\n*~*~*~*\n\nHe manifested himself at the absolute edge of his limit. Past the parking lot entirely, standing in the road with black trees swaying in the January wind like living shadows. His orange eyes stared into the darkness. It was almost four in the morning, but he knew damn well what he'd felt.\n\nThen he saw movement. One shadow blending through all the others in the moonlight. Coming from a different direction than he expected.\n\nHe called out her name and his words made no frost in the air. But soon he saw a twitching, bundled, slumping shape approaching, puffing out tiny white clouds with every step.\n\nHe physically could not take a step closer. He reached out to her and saw his arm starting to fade and warp. He screamed her name again.\n\nWhen he saw her eyes, they were frozen open. Almost literally. Tiny icicles had formed in her eyelashes. Her tears and running nose had turned to ice. He strained towards her, but could only watch in excruciation as she limped on icicle feet towards him.\n\nShe did not hug him so much as collapse onto him. Nylsearis dropped to his knees and pulled her in close He nuzzled into her hair. Left fierce kisses all along her scalp. She had almost no body heat. It was like holding a beef bone in a meat freezer.\n\n\"TRACY!!! [b]WHERE WERE YOU!?[/b]\"\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\n\nAn hour ago, she had been lying in bed.\n\nHer mother stood at the entrance to her bedroom. It was no longer a doorway, as the door had been removed. \"Are you all tucked in?\"\n\n\"Yes, Mom,\" the young chipmunk said in monotone.\n\n\"Take your pills?\"\n\n\"Yes, Mom.\"\n\n\"Gonna get a good night's rest and do great at school tomorrow?\"\n\n\"Yes, Mom.\"\n\n\"Your father will be up and ready to drive you to school.\"\n\n\"I know, Mom. Just like always.\"\n\nThe woman stood there in the hall light, looking at the lump of her daughter shadowed under bedsheets. The smile fell from her face. \"I don't like this any more than you do. But remember, you chose this.\" She turned and stalked off towards her bedroom, wishing she had something to slam.\n\nTracy stared up at the ceiling. It had been like this, almost word for word, every night for weeks. Ever since the hospital had let her go. Tonight was her breaking point. She was either going to escape or die. She didn't know how, but she hoped Nyl could somehow catch her if the latter happened.\n\nShe kept herself awake all through the night. Pinching her thigh every time her eyelids felt heavy. Even digging her little claws into her palm so hard she nearly broke the skin. In the dark she whispered to herself, \"I got through all three devotions. I can keep myself awake a few more stupid hours.\"\n\nShe felt her bladder ring the pee alarm, but forced herself to ignore it. Actually, the discomfort helped keep her awake, so that was good. She screwed her legs together back and forth, and through sheer force of will made the urge stop. Dad had installed a motion detector in the hallway. If she'd gotten up to pee, there would have been a loud noise like a trombone blat, and then one of them would've been up in a flash to check on her.\n\nThe pills made her drowsy. Damn stupid pills. Awful, ugly, chalky little pills. Tracy looked at her dresser and knew the little amber bottle was among the indistinct dark shapes there. \"Fuck you, pills,\" she whispered. To the best of her knowledge, she had never said the f-word before in her life. But those dumb rotten pills deserved it. They were leaning on her mind. Trying to make her eyes close. Trying to make her sink into the bed like quicksand. She had to stay awake. She reached back and pulled her tail: three hard yanks. That sent enough pain up her spine to keep her eyes open a few minutes more.\n\nShe turned away from the room, making sure she wasn't in too comfortable a position, and ran through the lyrics of every song she knew the words to. She remembered the times tables. She took herself back in her memories to every wonderful, magic moment that had happened to her at the mall. All her friends, who WERE NOT IMAGINARY. Who were REAL. No matter what those STUPID DOCTORS MADE HER SAY.\n\nWhen she had reached the absolute limit of her tolerance, she rolled over to look at the clock and saw she'd overshot her goal by twelve minutes. She almost started crying. The pills made that difficult too.\n\nTracy lifted away her covers. In absolute silence, moving in 100% slow motion, she got herself ready. She had placed a pair of sweatpants and a warm fleece shirt at the foot of her bed under her blankets. Her socks and underwear were already on beneath her pajamas. She was about to take the pajamas off to begin dressing, but figured an extra layer of insulation was not a bad idea. In fact it was such a good idea, she reached way over to the hamper and pulled out an extra pair of socks too. Dirty, but weather this cold killed off odors. She put her pants on. She put her shirt on. She put her heaviest coat and her shoes on.\n\nThen she turned to her window and, agonizingly slow, opened it up. Just as carefully, she lifted the storm window and let in the biting cold air.\n\nIt cut through her like a hail of daggers. Like falling through helicopter rotors made of ice. This was not some breezy mid-November afternoon. This was the dead of night in January. There was almost a foot of snow in the backyard. In fact, she knew exactly how much snow was in the backyard. Tracy shuffled forward, towards the moon, holding the storm window up above her head. She eased herself out the bedroom window until she was perched on the ledge eleven feet off the ground.\n\nShe eased the pane back into place behind her. Hesitated. Then let it click shut.\n\nThat was it. She had literally nowhere else to go now. She looked down at the snow. Dotted here and there with footprints from the twins, but mostly an intact blanket of white. It would either cushion her fall or it wouldn't. She would either break her neck or she wouldn't. She would either drive her shins up through her kneecaps or she wouldn't. The pills were good for exactly one thing: they dulled her emotions and made her listless, so it was easy to go completely limp when she let go.\n\n[b]WOOMPH[/b]\n\nTracy looked up at the stars. Except she was looking down, not up. The stars were little flecks of color shooting around in her vision. The pain hadn't even kicked in yet, but she knew it was going to be bad. That was okay though. She'd known it was going to hurt. The more important question was, could she get up and walk?\n\nTurned out she could. Awesome.\n\nTracy stood there in the snow, feeling like a pile of broken broomsticks nailed together. The January wind clawed at her face, and she tucked her muzzle down low into her collar. She wished she'd brought a scarf. She took a few steps, wincing. She'd probably broken a toe, but her feet were gonna be ice cubes soon so that wouldn't bother her long. She felt all up and down her body. Amazingly, nothing else seemed broken. \"Thank you, snow,\" she said quietly.\n\nShe took in a deep breath. It was like inviting icicles into her lungs. She was outside, but she knew that was only half the plan. This was like a spacewalk. She had just jumped out of the airlock, and now she was in the void. She looked up at the onyx sky and the silver stars. This was the part where she had to jump across the raw coldness of the cosmos to get to the other space station before she froze to death. That was literally what would happen if she didn't keep moving. It was below zero out here. The only thing keeping her from dying was herself. So she got going.\n\nShe slogged through the backyard. She forced open the gate. There was so much darn snow in the way she had to squeeze through sideways. Her gasps of pain left clouds in the air. She ran down the driveway, across the neighbor's yard, heading east.\n\nBut once she reached the shoveled sidewalk, she turned right back around in the opposite direction. Maybe it would snow by morning and it wouldn't matter. But she wanted to make sure they wouldn't get her again. Doubling back past the house (and fighting off the terror that her mom would be looking out the window that very instant), she headed west, then turned north at the corner. She was inverting her usual route. Go north, get to Chambers, and head east that way. There might be more lights along the freeway, but if she stuck close to the sides of buildings, it might keep her concealed [i]and[/i] lessen the wind.\n\nTracy didn't have her music player any more, but she had her memory. She recalled a good song with a steady beat and headed off.\n\nThe night turned familiar houses unfamiliar. Shadow-frosted nightmares. Trees and mailboxes looked like strange grownups hanging around out in the dark, just on the borders of her vision. Tracy kept her focus on the sidewalk ahead, watching out for ice. She did not run too fast. She didn't want to overexert herself and pass out. That would be very bad. She wanted to maintain just enough of a pace to keep her heart going and keep herself warm. She thanked the stars above for her pajama idea. The wind would have cut her guts out otherwise. She was already starting to wish she'd put on three pairs of socks.\n\nShe turned east. \"Halfway there. I can do this. I passed all three of my devotions. All three.\"\n\nTracy ran past empty fast food restaurants, a church with all its lights out, and a shuttered garage with gleaming metal shapes piled in the windows. There was a huge shopping center parking lot she had to cross. It made her feel like a tiny running bug, so easy to pick off for the swooping wind vultures. There was more light on this road, but it was all unforgiving. It made everything blinding bright or pitch black. Tracy was glad she'd practiced jogging around the neighborhood after dark. Her parents had only let her do it in the summer, but still, she'd developed very good night vision. Plus, the snow was helpfully reflective. She even spotted a dime in the street between the dry cleaners and the seafood place, but she left it there for someone else to find.\n\nHer pace was good and steady, but she staggered to a stop at the corner where the mall was.\n\nWhere the mall had been.\n\nShe stared. Gut-punched. Disbelieving. It was a giant vacant lot. Nothing more. It had been bulldozed down to the foundation. No more skylights. No more tree. No more angel.\n\nShe felt tears form at the corners of her eyes and freeze almost instantly.\n\n\"NO!!!\" she screamed into the night. Not caring if anyone heard. Because this was unfair. Not after she'd planned for so long and ran all night and [i]fell out of a stupid damn window[/i] and-\n\nStupid. Oh yes she was. She barked a hoarse laugh. This was the wrong corner. Whatever had been here wasn't the mall. When she ran down her normal path, it was the [i]third[/i] dirt road heading north, not the first.\n\nHope filling her heart again, Tracy stared into the distance. There! Less than a mile away, she could just barely see the arch of the old mall sign.\n\nShe was too worn out for a shout of joy, even though she definitely wanted one. And even better, she realized she could turn her mistake into a positive. A big vacant lot like this, she could cut across diagonally to that little parallel road that ran behind the buildings. She knew it connected through; she'd used it as a shortcut once. She wouldn't have to circle around the mall to get to the back entrance.\n\nShe headed southeast. This would save a bit of time. Which was good because she couldn't feel her feet all the way up past her ankles. They might have fallen off three blocks ago for all she knew.\n\nThe shortcut behind the buildings was almost totally black. It had also not been plowed very well. Tracy forced herself up and over minor mountains of snow, past dumpsters that still managed to stink, even in this chill. The darkness was massive. On any other night she would have been paralyzed with fear, picturing all the monsters and killers that were lurking in it. But she forced herself to believe there was nothing there. And of course there wasn't. Nothing else living was out tonight in this cold.\n\nShe came to the end of the alley. She saw a very handsome fox in a blue guardsman's uniform staring down the tree-lined road, searching in the shadows for her. The nastiest part of her mind told her it was a mirage. Did people start to hallucinate when they got too cold? Or was that when they got too hot? She didn't know. But she'd had too many ugly surprises lately to let herself believe in this one. Not until she was falling into his arms and he was planting kisses in her hair.\n\nHe asked her where she'd been. \"I tried to,\" was all she could get out at the moment. She was awfully tired.\n\nWhen he picked her up and carried her towards the building, it was such a relief, she actually began to smile.\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\n\nNyl waved the loose board out of his way. Tracy felt like a bundle of icicles. He gave her toes an experimental pinch and got no reaction. He quickened his stride through the dingy stockroom and Payne's graffiti'd walls.\n\nIt was hard for Tracy to believe where she was. She'd been walking for so long it seemed impossible she'd actually reached her destination. The warmth of the building hadn't caught up to her yet. Her legs still felt like they were walking. But no, Nyl was. Her angel was holding her and carrying her inside.\n\nThe mall was dark, lit only by moonbeams let in through the skylight. But the Christmas tree was glowing bright too. Tracy's smile grew a little as they drew closer towards it. Green and gold and silver. So pretty. She was kind of glad he hadn't put on the whole illusion for her. That would have been overwhelming. This, just this, was nice.\n\nHe looked down at the shivering fluffball in his arms, amazed she was smiling after coming in from weather like that. Had she walked all the way from home? \"We are getting you straight into the hot tub and out of your body, little one. You have no idea how-\"\n\n\"No.\"\n\nHe stopped in his tracks. His footsteps echoed for a few seconds after. Her request had been perfectly clear, but he didn't understand it. \"No?\"\n\nTracy looked up to him and the drowsiness was starting to clear from her eyes. \"I'm so sorry I made you wait. And I'm sure everyone else wants to know what happened to me. But I just can't. Now. Please. Take me into the restroom and do the ritual like you told me about. Please.\"\n\nHis breath quickened. \"Tracy, you vanish for over a month and now you show up out of nowhere and ask me for that!? Forgive me if I'm confused!\"\n\n\"Let's sit down then,\" she croaked. Then winced. \"But not for too long, okay?\"\n\nHe nodded. He did not waste time taking her anywhere else. A bench emerged right there in the middle of the lower south concourse and he sat on it. He moved to slide Tracy down beside him, but she shook her head.\n\n\"Can I sit on your lap?\"\n\nHe kissed her forehead. \"You certainly can.\" He positioned the little chipmunk as comfy as he could, holding her upright with his arms interlocked around her shoulders. \"If you don't want to discorporate, that's okay. I'm happy to do whatever you need from me. But can you at least give me a short explanation? I've been so worried! We've ALL been so worried!\"\n\nTracy looked around the empty mall. Yet of course it wasn't empty. She couldn't see them, but she knew her friends were all there. Probably still in their pajamas and yawning, but they'd be there. \"Hi,\" she said to the echoing room. Every part of her ached, including her neck, so she turned back to Nyl and just let her head flop against his shoulder.\n\nHe brushed his fingers through her fur, thinking she'd fallen straight to sleep.\n\nShe hadn't. It was just easier to close her eyes. \"I shouldn't have left after the party,\" she said. \"I came home just to see it one more time. But the next day, Mom snuck up on me. She saw my note, the one I was going to leave behind to tell them why I'd gone. I tried to hide it from her but she pulled it out of my hands. I stood there while she read it and I knew everything was over. When she was done, she looked up at me with this look...\" Tracy shuddered. \"Like she hated me more than anything in the world.\"\n\nNyl gave her a squeeze and a kiss.\n\nTracy sniffled. \"But she wasn't angry about me running away.\" She shook her head. \"No, she started yelling about how I'd messed up her big surprise. How she'd been waiting to tell the whole family the good news, and I blew it. 'You're always making things more difficult for me, Tracy! You had to go and ruin my special moment! This was supposed to be MY day!' I kept asking and asking what she meant, and finally she swung around and screamed it in my face: 'Tracy, I'm pregnant again'.\" \n\nNyl had been running his paw along the back of her head in a soothing motion. At that last word, he stopped short. \"Oh dear.\"\n\nShe snorted at his understatement. Getting warm was vital to her body at that moment, but tearing these words out of secrecy was even more vital to her mental health. \"I knew right away what she'd been thinking. 'Things aren't perfect enough around here, so let's try to make it all better with a new baby. That'll fix everything!' Except it wouldn't. It just meant, now the twins were going to go through everything that I had. Feeling forgotten and left behind. Replaced. I felt so bad for them. When Mom told me, I guess I couldn't keep the horror off my face. So she got [i]even angrier[/i]. She started drinking wine right out of the bottle, and she was shaking me by the arm, and then she called Dad and told him to come home and punish me, and then I guess that wasn't enough because then she called the cops.\"\n\nNyl's ears stood straight up. \"The police?\"\n\n\"The actual police!\" Tracy said. \"There was a big crazy scene in the driveway when they pulled up. Mom and I were both yelling over the sirens, trying to tell our sides of it. Dad showed up afterwards and at first the cops thought he was just some guy trying to intrude, so they were shoving him back, and that scared the twins, so they were yelling too. Mom showed the cops my note and I knew they were gonna take her side. I started fighting and screaming to get away, but those guys are really strong. They put me in the SUV, and I ended up at this little kids' mental hospital. They kept me there for two weeks. They thought my letter was a suicide note.\"\n\n\"Oh, Tracy. Poor sweetiefur.\" He protectively nuzzled her forehead. \"A part of me thought maybe you'd changed your mind. That you'd stayed with your family to try to repair things with them.\"\n\nTracy wrinkled her nose. \"I had a magic mall and an angel who hugs me. Who would ever give that up?\"\n\nHe chuckled. \"Well said. Go on, little one.\"\n\nShe sighed. \"The hospital wasn't too bad. The other patients were mostly nice. But I got stupid and told my roommate about you guys, and she tattletaled, and then the doctors were all over me. Telling me I had delusions. Telling me I had to come back down to the real world. They put me on pills. I guess they thought they were doing the right thing, but they made me say you weren't real.\" She sniffled. \"I didn't want to. But I knew they'd never let me out unless I said so.\"\n\nNyl nodded. He wiped her tear away with a fingertip.\n\n\"So I lied. And they looked real happy with me and said I'd made progress and let me come home. They'd told me a lot of stuff at the hospital about how Mom and Dad really cared about me and wanted me to get better. And I wanted to believe that, I really did. But when they drove up to get me, that drive home was so awful. They wouldn't say a word to me. We drove for two whole hours like that. And once we were home, Dad just vanished and Mom sat me down in the livingroom and...\" She choked on her words.\n\n\"Take your time,\" Nyl whispered to her.\n\nShe took his advice, and took deep breaths. \"Mom only cared about the neighbors,\" Tracy finally said. \"She didn't even say anything about all the other stuff. She was pissed at me over everyone seeing the cops in front of our house. Even though [i]she[/i] was the one who called them! She said the whole neighborhood was talking behind her back, and what an embarrassment that was, and wasn't I selfish and thoughtless, and what about HER!!\" She shouted that last word so forceful it made her start coughing. Nyl rubbed her back in a circular motion. \"Thanks.\"\n\n\"Very welcome. Go on. I am listening to every word.\"\n\nTracy nodded. \"She told me no more running. Dad would take me to school every morning and pick me up. He basically stopped talking to me after that. Like I was some package in his car he had to deliver. I don't think he hates me, he just doesn't know how to deal with the whole situation. So he just... doesn't. And Mom...\" Tracy clenched her teeth. \"She said things were going to be perfect from now on. She said I was going to be a good girl and help out with the new baby. She'd searched my whole room and got rid of everything she thought was 'rebellious'. My posters. Half my clothes. My music player...\" Pain gripped her heart for a moment, but from it she drew a sharp, spiteful smile. \"I held on to this though.\"\n\nTracy's frozen fingers didn't want to unzip her winter coat, but she made them do it anyway. She rooted around in her inner pocket until she felt a poke.\n\nNyl saw her take out a curved triangular shard of gold plastic.\n\n\"She broke it, and tried to throw it away. But I found a piece and kept it. I looked at it every time I was alone. I remembered you.\"\n\nNyl was overwhelmed. \"Tracy... I cannot stop saying how brave you are.\"\n\nShe smiled.\n\n\"But I think you're misremembering,\" he said.\n\nShe opened one eye questioningly, and then happiness spread across her whole face.\n\n\"How could she possibly break this? It's indestructible.\"\n\nTracy was holding a perfectly intact gold ornament in her paw. It was such a simple trick. She'd even known he'd probably do this. Yet it still filled her with so much inexpressible joy that, tired as she was, she pulled his paw closer to her mouth to kiss his fingers. \"Thank you. Thank you. Thank you, oh thank you, Nyl.\"\n\nHe tickled her chinfur. \"I have not even started cheering you up, little chipmunk.\"\n\nShe smiled. \"There's only one thing I want.\"\n\nHe knew what that was. He glanced towards the gentleman's restrooms. \"I know by now how strong your will is. You want to fulfill what we agreed to back in November.\"\n\nA resolute nod. \"I do. For a while I thought maybe I was just being selfish, but I can't stay in that house anymore. I [u]can't[/u]. I can't keep being unhappy just to make them happy.\"\n\nHe pulled her close and kissed between her ears. \"That isn't selfish. Not at all. You are not obligated to keep on giving to people who only take.\"\n\nTracy thought about that for a moment.\n\nNyl stared off into the middle distance. \"What you're asking though... It's going to hurt. It's gonna hurt so bad. I hate to have to put you through that. Are you sure you can handle it?\"\n\nShe grinned in a very Saffron way. \"I jumped out my bedroom window tonight. I froze my toes off, and one of 'em's broken probly. I can deal.\"\n\nHe nodded in acknowledgment. \"You won't be able to see your friends for a little while. It'll be at least a couple days till I can reincorporate you.\"\n\n\"I know,\" she said sadly. Then a bit louder, she addressed the rest of the room, \"I'm so sorry everyone! I know you probably wanna welcome me back. Maybe even throw a big party. And I want to see you too! But I'm so cold. I just want to be warm and fall asleep. We can see each other soon. Is that okay?\"\n\nHe kissed her ear again. \"None of them minds. Not a single one. They're just glad to know you're allright. Cassie's telling me they'll wait as long as you need. And Freddy said he missed your buck teeth.\"\n\nTracy couldn't stop a giggle at that.\n\n\"He looks quite proud of himself for getting a laugh out of you.\"\n\n\"I bet he does.\"\n\nNyl shifted his arms to get a steady grip on her. He stood up and the bench melted into the floor. He carried Tracy towards the restrooms, but made sure to take a few extra steps so she could look up into the big Christmas tree's branches.\n\nShe appreciated that. As they passed, she held her ornament towards the greenery.\n\nNyl nodded and levitated it to an empty branch. \"That one gets a spot of honor. We'll make sure to remember which one's yours.\"\n\n\"Put it where it was when I first saw it,\" she said, grinning. \"When I come back, I can jump and get it again.\"\n\n\"Will do,\" Nyl pledged.\n\nThere was absolutely nothing scary about the room of ashes anymore. The darkness inside was soothing. The silence a relief. Tracy saw little skulls on the floor and felt nothing but happy anticipation. 'Pretty soon, that'll be me!'\n\nNyl reached the center of the room, where the floor sloped down into a shallow pit. \"Do you think you can stand?\"\n\n\"I dunno,\" Tracy admitted. Nyl very, very carefully eased her down until her shoes met the scorched tile. Her feet were starting to feel like raw hamburger pincushions. Shooting pains raced up and down her shins. She was a bit wobbly and had to hold onto Nyl for a few moments at first, but then managed to stay up on her own. \"I'm okay.\"\n\n\"Allright.\" He receded to disappear in the dusky smoke at the back of the room. \"Just tell me when you're ready.\"\n\n\"Right now,\" Tracy said impatiently.\n\nA chuckle from the fog. \"Then let's get going. First things first, one undressed chipmunk.\"\n\nTracy did not think she had the energy required to even shake her coat off. But just as she reached for the zipper, someone else took it. \"Oh!\"\n\nWhat happened next brought her back in time to her very first introduction, when her clothes had danced with her in a waltz. Now her pants lifted her into the air so her shoelaces could untie themselves and her socks could wriggle off like snakes. Her coat disgorged her arms and fluttered away. Her shirt held her aloft while her pants, pajamas and undies all removed themselves in that order. The shirt lowered her back to earth, then it and her pajama top took to the air like flapping birds. All that was left was her bracelet. It pulled her arm forwards, just as if someone were taking her hand to place a kiss upon it. Tracy tried her best to curtsy and not fall over. \"Why thank you, sir! You make me feel like Cinderella.\"\n\nShe turned to watch her clothes go floating away for safekeeping. When she turned back, she was seemingly alone. \"Nyl?\"\n\n\"I'm still here. Just 'waking up' so to speak.\"\n\nTracy nodded. She fidgeted foot to foot. She stared into the inky fog. \"That stuff's not, like, a big cloud of kid ash, is it?\" And she'd walked right through it before. Blech.\n\n\"No, no,\" a soft laugh. \"It's just a covering. Think of it as my dressing curtains.\" He made a sound like stretching. \"Ahhhh. There we go. I'll be out in a second.\"\n\nTracy waited patiently, and soon saw movement within the black fog. Twitching. She watched in numbed fascination as a million red worms approached. Nerves. Snaking along the floor, the walls, and the ceiling. Uncountable tiny branches. She looked deeper into the mist. She gasped when she saw the shape approaching.\n\nNyl had untethered himself from the wall. A man made of squirming nerves was walking towards her, and spreading out his ten-foot wingspan until it scraped the sides of the room.\n\nShe was so startled she tripped, but his protrusions lashed forward and caught her in the blink of an eye.\n\n\"I won't let anything bad happen to you.\"\n\nThe voice came from everywhere and nowhere in the room. Nyl's face was still a featureless knob of tangled red licorice. His nerves spiraled around her wrists and ankles. Very gentle, but still making her shiver. Of course, being naked and frostbitten also contributed. Tracy looked down to the bits of Nyl writhing around her feet and noticed that several of her toes had turned dark at the tips. Her fingers too. She wondered if her nose was also affected. She couldn't feel it either.\n\nBut really, that was okay. She was here now. She didn't need this body anymore. Nyl's unorthodox arms caressed up and down her sides. Gliding across her fur like skiers through snow. She closed her eyes and let herself relax completely as they traced her every shape. When she felt her legs give out, there was barely a jostle before the nerves were supporting her. They placed her arms at her sides and her legs together. Standing her up straight like a candle.\n\n\"I told the truth when I said I couldn't make the pain any less,\" Nyl's voice spoke into her ears. \"But they can.\"\n\nTracy was getting sleepy again and almost asked 'who'. But then she knew. She couldn't see them, hear them, or feel them. But she did not doubt they would be right there with her.\n\nHis faceless face leaned closer. Tracy was being so good, so still. Such a brave girl. \"I hate to cause you any more pain after all you've already been through tonight.\"\n\nShe nodded. \"It's okay. This'll be the last of it, right?\"\n\n\"That's right, Tracy. This will be over soon.\"\n\nShe closed her eyes and braced herself.\n\nIt started slow. And at first it was very pleasant. A warmth began in her hands and feet, and grew. It spread into her fingers and toes, traveling up her limbs towards her core. She could feel it in her tail and her throat. After an icy night like tonight, this was more than bliss.\n\nTracy held onto that good feeling for as long as she could. Because the temperature was getting higher. Soon her hands felt like they were palms-down on a hot stove; her feet like she was walking through fire. She mumbled a little, but she was not about to let herself scream. This was what she'd wanted all this time. This was Nyl's gift to her, as much as it was her gift to him. She had to see this through. Her fourth devotion.\n\n\"You're doing so good,\" his voice spoke to her. Calming as a splash of cool water.\n\nBut the heat was consuming her now. It went from sunshine at the peak of summer to feeling like she was locked inside a steel crate on that same day. She began to cry, and soon the tears were boiling on her cheeks. Each breath felt like she was drinking burning gasoline. She bit her gums to keep from shouting. She would be a good girl! She would endure this!\n\nBut no amount of willpower can change the fact that when a body is being incinerated from the inside out, the soul within cannot help but scream. Poor Tracy held on as long as she could, but soon her mouth was wide and wailing. Shrieking his name. Crying out to make the pain stop.\n\n\"[i]VANDYKE!!! VANDYKE!!! VANDYKE!!![/i]\"\n\n\"I'm so, [i]so[/i] sorry, Tracy,\" he spoke directly into her mind. \"I can't stop it once it's started. But it will all be over soon. I am so proud of you. I love you so much.\"\n\nShe could barely process the meaning of what he said. The pain was obliterating her, blotting out everything but itself. Destroying her down to the molecule. The air was full of thick, charred smoke. Her own body going up in flames. Invisible, internal flames of divine fire. Nyl was roasting her alive. Baking her in an oven of her own skin. She screamed and thick churning smoke clouds rolled out of her mouth and eyes.\n\nJust when she thought she would rather be wiped from existence than endure a single second more, she became aware of a hand upon her shoulder. Then another.\n\nHer eyes were still sealed shut by agony, but she felt little paws take hold of her. Squeezing soft. Doing their best to comfort her. And the pain began to ease. Just as Nyl had said. The sensation was still there, and yet it began to matter less. It was just another feeling among many. Still intense, but increasingly, bearable.\n\nTracy was able to breathe again. With every exhale, she was giving up more of her essence to Nyl. The smoke traveled from her burning body into his. He pulled her in through a seemingly endless inhale. Changing her to smoke and drawing her in with his breath. Dragging on a chipmunk cigarette.\n\nHer eyes struggled open. At first all she could see was flickering, dancing grey. The smoke. Her smoke. Her burning body. The nerves were all around her in a web, head to toe. Her fur had carbonized to dust. Her skin was glowing red like molten metal. She watched her body disintegrate into particles of ash. She watched her guardian angel consuming her.\n\nAnd other eyes were looking back at hers. Worried, concerned, loving faces crowded around her. There were voices drifting to her that said such tender, caring things.\n\n\"[i]We're so glad you came back.[/i]\"\n\n\"[i]I missed you every day.[/i]\"\n\n\"[i]I love you, Tracy. We all do.[/i]\"\n\n\"[i]It'll be over soon, don't worry.[/i]\"\n\n\"[i]We'll wait right here for you. Take all the time you need.[/i]\"\n\n\"[i]Get some rest.[/i]\"\n\n\"[i]We love you.[/i]\"\n\nVoices and faces in the furnace. Her body was turning from red to white hot. Bright as a lightbulb. Even through the stinging glow Tracy could see their faces. One, two, three... Was someone missing? Tracy was confused. She could make out most of her friends, but some of them were gone. There was Violet and Tybalt and Eleanor. Freddy, and what must have been Kevin beside him. And there were two Cassies. No, wait. One of them was a boy. 'That must be her brother she mentioned.' Tracy was happy they were back together.\n\nHer pain had been transformed. It still raged as powerful as ever, but she was floating on top of it now. Coasting. The fire burned inside and destroyed her into ash, and that was okay. It was nice. She was giving herself to Nyl. She watched misty tendrils of herself float across the room and enter his body. That's where all of her would be soon. Like shooting up a chimney. The image made her smile. She pictured herself as a little burning yule log.\n\nSeeing Tracy smile, the others did too. The little chipmunk felt kisses on her cheeks. A paw stroked her shoulders. Another, her tail. All sorts of gentle, pleasing touches. She cried out softly. Not a scream anymore. A soft coo. Begging for them to continue. For the fire to consume her fully, and for her friends to help her along.\n\n\"Almost there, my sweetheart,\" Nyl told her. \"Almost time for bed.\"\n\nTracy thought that sounded perfect. Snuggling up inside her angel to sleep all night and day? Fantastic. Maybe a few days. Heck, why not a week? She felt like she hadn't truly slept a single night since she'd been taken to the hospital. But no one could stop her now. She was standing in the fire. The fire was inside. No one could pull her away from it. Her body was already too far gone to be caught again.\n\nPain became joy. Tracy cried happy tears that vaporized instantly. Her skin changed again from heat-white to charcoal dark. Every movement sent flakes of soot falling. She was an overdone marshmallow. Time to eat her before she got too gooey and fell off the stick. Tracy giggled. Her friends hugged and kissed her. The fire sped her along to where she wanted to be. She was burning. A bright little sun to warm her favorite angel.\n\n\"[i]Goodbye.[/i]\"\n\n\"[i]See you soon.[/i]\"\n\n\"[i]We love you.[/i]\"\n\nTracy felt the last shards of her structure fall away. Her brittle skin cracked, splintered, and turned to dust. The skeleton underneath held stable for a moment longer, then came tumbling down with the sound of a scattering bamboo necklace. Her little skull bounced and rolled next to Saffron's. The remaining dust swirled and flowed towards its inevitable destination. Tracy murmured in happiness and rode along with the flowing embers. Traveling into love. Inside Nyl. Inhaled. Consumed. Safe at last.\n\nThe other cubs hugged themselves close to Nyl and watched as the last grey swirls of Tracy vanished inside of him.\n\nThen it was dark. A deep burgundy red all around with no details to make out. Tracy was descending down a long elevator with a heartbeat. Still incorporeal. Still just a happy puff of soot. Content to simply waft along wherever Nyl would place her. She trusted him.\n\nSoon there was light. Flickering like candles. Tracy emerged into a cathedral. A huge room, spiraling around and around within itself like a möbius strip. The walls were a welcoming pink. Her vision was hazy, but she could tell the little candles were in lined-up rows of recessed divots along the walls.\n\nExcept they weren't candles. How silly of her. They were souls. Dozens and dozens. As Tracy floated closer, she could see sleeping faces. Little cubs smiling in their dreams. Whatever force was moving her forward knew just where to take her, because Tracy squeaked in happiness to draw nearer to a sleeping skunkette and leopard.\n\nShe was nestled into the crevasse between the two. A spot picked out just for her. She settled into her very own alveoli; snug as a sleeping bag.\n\nTracy was happy. Her vision began to dim, even though she and the other souls were luminous. She watched Bonnie's eyes move behind her eyelids, and Saffron's jaw twitch as if she was chewing on something. Tracy wondered what they were dreaming. She wondered if maybe she could join them there.\n\nThough even if her future held nothing but blank, warm darkness, that was okay too.\n\nShe was really, [i]really[/i] sleepy after all.\n\nTracy yawned. Then she was out like a light.\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\n\n\n\nSEVEN MONTHS LATER\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\n\nIt was an absolutely spectacular August afternoon. The sun's sizzling heat poured down over everything like a fine sheen of honey, yet it was just on the right side of sweltering. Hot enough to want to get out and play in, but no so hot it left you plastered to your bed and begging for winter. Tracy was dripping with perspiration, dancing right on the edge of heatstroke, and her calves were about to blow out. But she [u]loved[/u] it. Her radiant grin gave the sun competition. Running in winter was fun because you could balance the chill with body heat and find a nice equilibrium. But summer running was fun because it was just [i]fun![/i] There was so much more to see this time of year! Car dealerships all dressed up in pennants and balloons. Little kids scampering around blasting each other with squirt guns. Chatting couples nibbling at exotic meals on restaurant patios. A parade of colorful pedestrians, and an ocean of gleaming cars. Sometimes she'd even spot an old classic machine with a lotta chrome and those lipstick-shaped tailfins. The freeway to her left was a constant tidal roar. Oddly befitting the tropical, beach-feeling jam spilling out of her music player. She had SO many more playlists now, including ones for every type of weather. Today's was Cabana. Also she had to admit that fanny packs were a bit lame, but there really wasn't a better way to carry around your music when the only other things you were wearing were sneakers and socks.\n\nTracy swayed to the beat in her birthday suit. Bopping down the avenue, giving the whole world a look at her trim, toned tummy and pistoning legs. She even flashed her big silly buck teeth in a smile at everyone she passed. Sweat glistened on her auburn fur. Her eyes were wide and bright, taking in the bustling, vibrant, percussive panorama of the city.\n\nIt was about five blocks back to the mall, but she thought a little top-up couldn't hurt. Mostly she had been twirling and dodging past all the pedestrians she shared the sidewalk with, but up ahead was an older raccoon on a bike heading towards her. She parked herself in his path, legs akimbo, and let him run over her.\n\nOr rather [i]through[/i] her. Tracy's form rippled for a second, then she let out a satisfied 'Ahhhh,' like she'd just taken a nice big chug of cool lemonade. The raccoon fellow continued on as usual, but did feel a brief, not-unpleasant tickle in his belly region.\n\nFully-refreshed, Tracy switched songs to find one with an even peppier pace. Taking a drink from someone always made her hyper for a few moments! This was something she had discovered by complete happy accident last winter, as she was testing the limits of how far she could get from the mall before getting all woozy and insubstantial. She had stumbled against a living person and felt their energy nuzzle against hers like static electricity. And, on reflex, she tried some. In that moment, Tracy felt like she could run like greased lightning. Testing it, she found the limits of her perimeter had now doubled. And when she took a bigger sip from another passerby, it [i]quadrupled[/i]. She understood the implications of this immediately and fell to the sidewalk on her knees crying tears of joy. Tracy had her run back.\n\nThough not without risk. This was just as much a spacewalk as her January birthday (as she called it now). There was always the potential danger of being too far away from the mall and running out of living souls to pinball off of. She wasn't sure what she'd do when wintertime came again and there'd be fewer pedestrians out, but for right now, that problem was far in the future and miles from her mind.\n\nSome of the other cubs experimented with taking jaunts away from the mall, but not even Saffron was bold enough to do it as often or for such long distances. With no corporeal body to hold her back, Tracy felt like she never had to stop. Fatigue was now a fully-corrected error. She was even planning, someday before the weather turned bad again, to see if she could run for 12 straight hours from sunup to sundown. The danger of it thrilled her (and worried Nyl considerably), but she couldn't resist. Running was what she was born to do. And letting go of her old life had not forced her to sacrifice it, but had granted her a whole new way to explore what she loved.\n\nNow Tracy had found her role in the group. She was their courier. Every day, even in the rain, she tried to go someplace she'd never been before. Some new diner, or record shop, or yard sale. Just today she'd decided to take a peek in that all-you-can-eat sushi bar over by the main library. Like a frisky wind, she'd darted back and forth amongst the diners, touching everything on everyone's plates. Not that they noticed. Ghosts couldn't be seen, or spread germs. But what they [i]could[/i] do was take that sense memory back to Nyl to make it a new part of the mall's ever-growing illusion. Plus, she'd thought to detour home today through the sporting goods outlet and touch a few airsoft guns and a buttload of BBs. Freddy and Kevin would go wild. Something new to blast heads off mannequins with.\n\nArriving at her destination, Tracy paused her music. The construction equipment drowned it out anyway. The Heaven Plaza mall was now a memory. Transformed by heavy machinery into a humongous hole in a vacant lot, plus several mountains of dirt, a brand new metal infrastructure, yards of timber and tubing, and about a mile of disposable 'keep out' fencing. The big shiny graphic on the Coming Soon! sign showed what the new Beech Township Collection would look like. A bit snootier than Tracy would have liked. But hey, they'd be getting a theater!\n\nTracy climbed up a backhoe and hopped the fence. Tybalt was tanning and gave her a wink and salute. Tracy blew him a kiss. Cassie and her brother Clyde were up on the biggest dirt pile making dirt castles. Clyde finished a turret and, needing a flag for the top, reached out his arm and picked up a hazard flag lying fourteen feet away. Violet was up at the tiptop of the new scaffolding, and Tracy watched as she swooshed down to earth in a lovely parabola.\n\nBy day the site was such a hive of activity and flux that it was difficult for Nyl to maintain more than a few illusory rooms at a time. That's why it appeared to Tracy that there was a lonely video game store right in the middle of the construction, with guys in hardhats and reflective vests walking right through where Freddy and Kevin (today in his fearsome Kevindrake form) were trying to knock each other off the road in a driving game. Eleanor was cheering them on at the top of her lungs over all the jackhammer noise. Looking higher up, Tracy could also see a tiny bedroom floating in the air: Saffron's alcove abode. The leopardess was flat on her back snoozing with her tail dangling over the side. All tired out from a long morning working on the punching bag that Tracy had brought her from a nearby gym.\n\nA little nude skunk in a sun bonnet and sandals came running up to say hello. Bonnie was only marginally shorter than Tracy, but the chipmunk still felt powered-up enough to give her a short piggyback ride. That is, until they fell over in a giggling mess in a pool of freshly-poured concrete. Bonnie decided to stay a while, since it was cool and thick and mucky like a mud bath. Tracy teased that she'd better get out again before it dried or else she'd be a permanent floor decoration. Bonnie said she was quite capable of teleporting away at any time. Tracy ruffled her fur, gave her a kiss, and headed on.\n\nIt had never actually been spoken between them, but Tracy had noticed how Bonnie almost always popped up whenever she came home from her journeys. Making sure she wouldn't vanish again. Tracy couldn't blame her for that. After 'percolating' for a few days inside Nyl's soul-repository, Tracy had emerged as a freshly-minted ghostmunk and learned what had happened in her absence. It had been as hard on all of them as it had been for her. They'd planned a big party, then waited and waited and waited all day for her to show. Then they waited Sunday. And Monday. 'Maybe she was busy over the weekend?' But a weekend became a week, and then longer. Everyone wondered where she'd gone. Tybalt tried his best to be a counselor for the others. Bonnie had a bit of a breakdown, unable to make herself believe that she wasn't responsible somehow for Tracy going away. Elly tried to help her, but soon realized that the only thing that could ease her friend's mind was a long rest. Nyl accommodated her. Then Saffron decided to go inside him two days later. Tracy's absence was something she could not fix, no matter what she did, and the frustration was driving her into a simmering rage. Nyl felt the loss of Tracy more than any of them, and his heart felt sure that he was responsible for this. He had scared her away. And he didn't know if that was for the worse or better. At least it helped the others cope when Clyde woke up and rejoined them. Just as sunny as his sister, the cubs now had two full-time morale officer mice.\n\nEverything changed when Tracy returned. After a lovely little 58-hour nap, she had woken up in Nyl's catacombs and instinctively knew the way out. As her smoky spirit floated away from its alcove, she reached back to shake Bonnie and Saffron awake too. The little skunk stared, dumbstruck, afraid she might still be dreaming. Saffron bit at the paw that jostled her, but then opened her eyes and lit up with joy. Soon a luminous seam appeared from within Nyl's corporeal form and three happy cubs crawled out. They were inundated with hugs, kisses, and tears. The family partied so hard that night, the moon probably heard them.\n\nIn the here and now, when the construction crew packed it in and went home each day, the lot went quiet and the illusion returned in full. Now Nyl could bring it all back. The fountain and tower, their bedrooms, the food court, the escalators, the huge movie screen, the stores, the food, the lights, and the tree. Tracy tried to think of what she had planned for tonight. Tybalt had been teaching her how to box lately. Or maybe a few laps around the underside of the skylights if Saffron got herself woken up. There was a new DVD she'd brought in for Eleanor that the giraffette was dying to see with everyone together. Maybe cake decorating (and dive-bombing) with Freddy. Maybe curl up beside Bonnie in her bedroom for some reading. Maybe even just take some time by herself to go through a few more albums in the music store. It had been months and she still wasn't even 1/4th through. Bliss.\n\nOr maybe she didn't want to be alone. Maybe she wanted something close and warm and naughty. Over the past few months, many eye-opening secrets had been revealed. Things that made her ornament-yiffing look tame in comparison. So maybe a game of Twister, or Baby The Babysitter, or Hide & Pee? Maybe ask Violet to be her sleeping bag. Or do some pouncing with Saffron in the trampoline room. Get close in the dance studio with Tybalt. Be the meat in a Cassie & Clyde sandwich. Or Kevin & Freddy? Maybe give a kiss under Bonnie's tail? Or under Eleanor's to drive Bonnie wild!\n\nThe choices were endless, and they were all exciting.\n\nAnd maybe she could spend some time right now with a certain favorite foxy angel.\n\nNyl was sitting cross-legged on a beach towel next to a pitcher of lemonade. Eyes closed, looking wholly at peace despite all the bulldozing right behind him. He was seated on that one spot in the mall where a whole bunch of little skulls had lain, yet everyone involved just seemed not to look too close there. In fact, by some silly coincidence, they'd laid a slab over that square first thing as construction began. And no one ever thought of it again. Tracy didn't mind her remains being buried (even though it had been kind of spooky-cool to pick up and examine her own headbone from time to time). At least now there was no worry that Nyl's true body would ever be found. It was hanging out, cozy and cool, in a little oubliette he'd hollowed out. Accessible but unseen. While the new mall was being completed, he was sure he could find as many ways as he needed to keep people looking away.\n\nTracy jogged over to him. She waved, but he didn't react. So then she went into stealth mode with a grin on her face. Backing up, she raised her tail and booped his nose with a buttcheek.\n\nNyl spoke up quite nonchalantly. \"Good afternoon, Tracy. I could see you the entire time, you know.\" She gave a cute yelp when he playfully gnashed his teeth at her tail. \"Rawr! So, how was your mission today?\"\n\n\"It was excellent!\" She got down on her knees beside him and leaned in for a big squeeze. He turned to rest his angled muzzle on her shoulder, and she shivered in delight as he inhaled her memories. Tracy did her best to recall all the new things she'd touched today. How they looked and smelled too: the more details the better. This was not as intense a process as having an emotion eaten, but she got to do it almost every day, so that balanced out.\n\nNyl licked his lips. \"I haven't had sushi in a long time. Good choice!\"\n\nShe beamed proudly. \"Thanks!\"\n\nNyl noticed something else in the inventory. \"BB guns?\" He rolled his eyes. \"Sure, because there's not already too much noise around here.\" He caught her with one hand and savagely tickled her bare tummy with the other.\n\nTracy whooped and managed to squirm away. She swished behind him and leaned down, resting her folded arms on top of his ears. \"Can't catch me. I'm too fast.\"\n\nHe looked up. \"You certainly are.\"\n\nTracy smiled, perfectly content in that moment. Just seeing the happiness in his eyes.\n\nNyl was [i]absolutely[/i] happy. Not just with the beautiful weather and a cuddly chipmunk perched on his head. But to have his whole family all together, riding this new change in their lives and making the best of it. Whatever the new mall would look like on the inside, they would customize it their way. Mixing the old with the new and making it theirs. And he had plans this time. This new mall would not be closing down due to mysterious disappearances. He knew he was rooted to the spot by his condition, but now he had a way to reach beyond himself. Even though he hoped for a world where no more cubs would ever need his rescue, if he sensed them, he was no longer limited. He now had a runner. A herald.\n\nTracy was unaware of his plans. Nyl would keep them secret until he was sure they would work (and if they were safe, and if they would even be needed). For now she was just grinning and squishing handfuls of his eartufts between her fingers. Also enjoying his luxuriant tail pressed between her belly and his back.\n\nBut then a movement on the other side of the construction site caught her eye. She stood up sharply.\n\nNyl turned around, alarmed. \"Tracy?\"\n\nShe pointed. \"That poor guy! He's gonna-\" But then a furry flying carpet came soaring in to save the day. Tracy smiled in relief. \"Never mind! Violet's got it.\"\n\n\n\n*~*~*~*\n\n\n\nA few moments later, a shaken bear descended his ladder and whapped his buddy on the arm. \"Christ on a cracker, Rich! Didja see that!?\"\n\nThe buff mouse looked around. \"See what?\"\n\n\"I was up on the dang ladder when I lost my balance! Thought I was gonna fall off 'n wreck my spine all to hell. Then outta nowhere it was like something gave me a shove forwards. Like an elbow at my back. Just like that, I was stable again.\" He looked up at where he'd almost fallen from. \"Whoo shit! The guys've been sayin' this job's haunted. If so, I'm goddamn glad for it!\"\n\nRichard laughed and went back to hauling cement sacks. \"It was the wind, you meathead!\"\n\n\n\n The End\n for now...\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n***\n\nAUTHOR'S NOTE\n\nThis story is not a metaphor for suicide. Not, not, NOT a metaphor for suicide. I wanted to make that clear, because I can easily see how it could be taken that way.\n\nTo be as explicit as I can, this is a story about knowing what your heart wants, and having the courage to leave behind people and places who are holding you back from it. Sometimes we have to face a bit of pain to get where we want to be. It's worth it though. And until any of us have proof of an afterlife, this one is all we know we have. So stay here a while. But nothing says you have to stay in one spot.\n\nI've had elements of this story floating around in my head for a very long while back, and seemingly out of nowhere they all spun themselves together and demanded I write about them. A character I drew for a single picture who felt like she deserved more. My nostalgia for the mall that always seemed like a magic place when I was young. The lonely feel of walking late at night in the cold. A Stephen King villain that I wondered what they'd be like if they were nice instead. And a short story I read once with an ending so wrong I've always wanted to rebut it.\n\nI should also mention that (this is true), I went out for my daily exercise a few days ago, and right in front of my house, in the grass, I found a small piece of a broken gold Christmas ornament. I don't know what to make of that.\n\nOnce again, super-enormo-thanks go to my troupe of proofreaders. A narrating bunny. A fox, cat, and squirrel trio of voice actors. Plus a proofreading pup. You guys are awesome. :3\n\nStarted: ‎January ‎12, ‎2017 Finished: February 1st, 2017 Editing Completed: March 3rd, 2017", "writing_bbcode_parsed": "Rungirl
by Alex Reynard

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PART ONE

*~*~*~*

Tracy skittered to a stop in the driveway. Both cars were gone again.

Not surprising. Why wouldn't they be? Why should today be any different?

The young chipmunk headed towards the side of the house, much slower than her blazing sprint from school. There wasn't an emergency, and she hadn't been chased; she just loved running. The three o' clock bell was her starting pistol. She tried to be the first one out the door every afternoon (which was a fun challenge since she sat back in the third row). Her sneakers carried her past the throngs of other students, down the front steps, and into the freedom of the open streets and sidewalks. Chipmunks are naturally lithe and swift, and Tracy had gotten excellent at dodging fellow pedestrians to keep time.

Her house key was cleverly hidden inside the bracelet she always wore. It folded out like a little switchblade. Tracy let herself in, wiped her feet, and hopped up the foyer stairs to the kitchen. Opening the door, she called out, "Dad? Mom?"

No answer. Her voice seemed to echo in the spacious house.

'Well at least the beasts aren't home,' she thought. Homework was bad enough without having to do it while juggling unpaid babysitting work. And this was Wednesday, so Candice wouldn't be by to clean until tomorrow. Tracy went to the fridge and checked the whiteboard. "Oh right, they've got karate today." That still got a head-shake out of her. No one could convince her that three-year-olds needed martial arts training. Mom was over-scheduling those two so much it'd be a miracle if they didn't grow up traumatized.

Tracy opened the fridge and shivered pleasantly when the chill hit her fur. She grabbed the water pitcher and, with no one to stop her, drank right out of the spout. "Mmmmm..." Sheer coldness filled her mouth and coursed down her throat. It was actually pretty chilly outside, being November and all, but a good run heats a furson up. Tracy’s insides felt like a charcoal grill getting splashed down and rinsed out.

She'd spilled a few drops on the tile. Noticing, she rubbed them out with her sneaker. That left a scuff on the pristine tile. Annoyed and slightly panicked, she bent down to scrub with her finger. She could hear Mom's phantom voice scolding her. God forbid there actually be any messes for the maid to clean up when she got here.

Mindful of her sneaks, Tracy made her way around the kitchen's islands, past the dining room table and cabinets, across the Alaska-sized livingroom, up the grand mahogany staircase to her room on the second floor. The only good thing about a house this stupidly big was that she could always find a place for herself. Even when the twins were bawling and Mom was blasting her shows, there was always some little nook she could squeeze herself into for some privacy.

She flung her backpack across the room to the bed, scoring a direct hit on her pillow. She had homework tonight, but it could wait a few minutes while she stretched. Bracing against her desk, she leaned and bent and turned and pulled. Nice and slow. Tensing to her limit, then relaxing. Feeling the luscious, receding burn in her muscles. She loved that. Loved to just close her eyes and feel her flesh move beneath her fur.

She glanced at the mirror on the back of her closet door. In her current pose, her tail sat on her butt like a dollop of striped sour cream. She waved it at herself. Some chipmunks had long frizzy tails like a caterpillar. Hers was a puff. A blob. She grabbed at it and pulled, as if it might just come right off out of embarrassment.

Tracy walked over to the mirror and leaned in. She thought for a mortified moment there was something in her teeth (and how great to realize she'd been walking around all day like that), but it must've been a trick of the light. Her teeth looked fine. Even though her front bucks were still way too big, as always. "Beaver teeth," she said to herself. She poked them, like maybe they might recede in a little. She prodded her nose: too big as well. Too wide. Making a dissatisfied pout, she looked over her whole face. Definitely not feminine. Her eyes were allright, she supposed. Ditto her ears and fur-stripes. Her hair was okay, but she thought it looked better long than short. The only reason it wasn't was because it kept blowing into her mouth when she ran, making her gag and p'tooie. Sorry, hair, but Tracy would always choose running over anything else.

She put her hands on her hips and swiveled herself to and fro. At least she liked her outfit. Lemon yellow and emerald green were her favorite colors, and any day when she got to wear them both was a good day. The colors complimented her copper-and-cream fur quite well. She posed in her t-shirt and shorts, noting how loose they hung on her. Daddy said she'd grow into her awkward proportions soon enough. She wasn't sure whether she looked awkward or not. She liked her body more than her face. It was a runner's body. She moved her palms down along her taut tummy, slim sides and tight legs. She was built for speed, not grace. And if Mom didn't like that then... Then to heck with her.

A fog of unconnected anger collected inside Tracy's head. She stared into her own eyes and didn't know why she was suddenly feeling so bitter. Nothing was different today than any other. But her cheeks were hot, and not from her run.

She decided to get her stupid homework done and out of the way. A power leap sailed her onto the bed. The springs creaked and the headboard bonked the wall, but there was no one in the house to tell her to keep it down. Tracy swam across her puffy comforter and waded through her stuffed animals to get to the backpack. She unzipped it, letting the books and papers and pencils come tumbling out in a heap. It was a lot simpler back in grade school. Back then it was just one teacher. Now in middle school, she had six of them. And it seemed like none of them could be bothered to get stuff finished in class, so they had to make up for it by conscripting kids into doing most of the work after school. "Mr. Cherroot wants chapter six of the biology book read and the three challenge questions answered. Mrs. Spang wants the social studies worksheet filled in." That'd be easy. You could just guess most of the time with multiple choice ones. "What else...? Sixteen math problems for Mrs. Bloom, and then Mrs. Tabenaux wants that short story about the sled dog race summarized. Oh, and I have to explore the important themes the author wanted us to notice! Well poop, why didn't he just say 'em right out loud at the end then?" Purely out of spite, Tracy gave a lightning-quick middle finger to her English textbook, then hid her hand in her lap as if her parents might materialize behind her and catch her in the act.

Tracy shuffled everything around on the bed, trying to get organized. But the more she tried to concentrate, the more her mind blanked. Four different subjects. Three a night was bad, but four was simply ridiculous. How did they expect anyone to keep up? She didn't even know what to start on.

As she was getting all her stuff ready, she came across her most recent spelling test. She uncrumpled the edges and held it up. Right up top in red ink was a B, circled. She was really proud of that. It was her best grade this year so far. She didn't even know how she'd pulled it off. Luck maybe, remembering eighteen out of twenty words right. But she was proud of it nonetheless. And it would have been really nice to show it off to Mom or Dad when they got home.

But Dad was at work. And Mom was out with the twins. So here she was alone in the house, like usual. Anymore these days, it felt like no one else lived here but her. Even when everyone was home and the place was noisy as hell, it still felt like that.

Or like maybe this was their home, and she was just some stranger who'd wandered in. Or a houseplant. Something voiceless to stand in the hall unobtrusively.

Tracy sat up straight, sinking into the poofy mattress. She stared at the wall above her bed, not seeing her posters. Not seeing anything. Feeling something painfully, but not able to identify it. Her mouth was hanging open a little.

On pure impulse, she hopped off the bed, grabbed her mp3 player, and headed for the door.

Halfway down the stairs she realized she'd never taken her shoes off. So maybe some part of her knew this was coming.



*~*~*~*



Tracy put her music on loud and ran. She had paused exactly long enough to make sure the door was locked behind her, then she was gone. She didn't want to come home tonight to find the place had gotten burgled because she'd been distracted. Although part of her didn't even care about that. It was their house. What did it matter to her?

Her hindpaws rebounded off the sidewalk in rhythm with the bass in her earphones. Sharp, relentless synths. A screamed female vocal. A machine beat; precise and impossible to disobey. When Tracy had her music on, she molded herself to each song. Her body was water, flowing into whatever beat passed through her. She was very selective about her songs. While some kids spent hours every night blabbing online, she spent her time crafting playlists. All songs were methodically handpicked to fit a certain mood. Some of these lists were Aquamarine, Velvet, Thunder, Sunlight, Moonlight and Jade. Today's was Hypnosis. That was for when she wanted to utterly blank her mind. Lots of remixes and EDM. Songs that were seven minutes, or nine, or longer. Songs to get lost inside of. Songs to stop existing to.

The November chill was powerless against Tracy's speed. Her heart pumped hot blood through every part of her and she never felt the cold. Some days she'd go without a jacket and not even realize the temperature until she could see her own breath misting in front of her. Sometimes in the summer she'd be feeling fine one second, then be dizzy and puking from heat exhaustion the next. She liked winter better. Autumn the best. A good chill kept her temperature regulated just perfect, and gave her incentive to keep moving.

All the big houses on her tree-lined street blurred into a background smear of colonial white and burgundy red. This wasn't the richest part of town, but it was definitely close. As a little girl, Tracy would see houses like hers in movies and not think anything of it. It was only a few years ago that it dawned on her how lucky she really was. Her running had taken her to ever-widening circles around the city, and sometimes to not-so-nice places. There were a few streets she had gone down and come straight back from, with no plans to ever return. She didn't tell her parents about the places she went to. It was part of why they let her run at all. They thought she was just running laps around their nice, safe neighborhood.

They'd have been astonished (probably horrified) to know she'd actually made it to the department store where they bought her clothes. And back! That first time, she'd needed to collapse in one of the fitting rooms and pant for about half an hour before she could head back home. But each time since, she'd needed a little less rest. Sometimes on her routes she'd reward herself with a little snack at some fast food place. Sometimes she challenged herself to find a restaurant she'd never been to before. Sometimes she intentionally got herself lost, just to see if she could find her way again. Of course, the easy way out of that was just to turn around and retrace her route. But that was only for when she'd really screwed up and gone down some dead end by mistake. It was much more satisfying to keep going through some mystifying unknown territory and suddenly emerge on a main road she knew well. Tracy had gotten smart about shortcuts too. She knew all every one in town, but wouldn't go down a new one unless she'd been on both sides and knew there wouldn't be a wall or a fence in the way. (Even then, some barriers were worth taking a moment to climb over if the shortcut was just that good.)

Past the tediously-familiar streets of her own neighborhood, there were the freeway houses to the south, the shopping district to the north, the sort-of-woods to the east, and suburbs-land to the west. Tracy had chosen east without thinking, and was already two songs in before she realized where she'd headed. She gave her instincts an approving nod before submerging back into the beat. East only had the one road that went down it, but it was plenty wide enough to share with the few cars that passed by. There were houses every now and then, sometimes with funny mailboxes (like the duck one), and immense backyards. That's why she thought of it as the woods. Her city was right under the shadow of the state capitol, so it was too urban for actual wilderness. But there were enough trees down this path to feel a bit like it. Right now the autumn colors were brilliant, and in wintertime the snow made everything look like pure magic.

Plus, the further east you went, the fewer traffic lights you had to deal with. Traffic lights were the bane of Tracy's existence. There was nothing worse than having a song build up to an excruciating pitch, then you had to stop at the light just when the beat dropped. Arrrrrgh. She'd jog in place but it wasn't the same. She sometimes wondered if the drivers waiting to cross saw her and thought she was having a tantrum. She wondered if any of them recognized her. 'There goes that girl who runs everywhere.' Maybe they did. No one had ever given any indication though. Her city was big enough that she only ever recognized a few people here and there on her jaunts. The old mountain lion who was always on his porch. The hedgehog and his son at the gas station. The cashier cat with the dreadlocks downtown. Everyone else was just a blur of Pred and Prey.

Tracy had been taught all her life not to talk to strangers. The PSAs and books and school presentations all made it seem like everyone she ever met was out to get her. From real-life experience, Tracy had observed that 99% of furs just went about their own business not giving a dump about anyone else. So maybe she wasn't anything to anyone else. Just a green, yellow and brown blur that streaked past sometimes.

The rhythm in her ears erased everything else between them. Tracy was running. Nothing else. 'Running' was the sum total of her identity at that moment, and that was fantastic. She barely observed the houses she flew past. The uncollected newspapers in the bushes. The packages left on porches by indifferent delivery drivers. The toys in the yard. Even the duck mailbox. Her eyes saw, but her mind assigned no importance. When she was in this state, she was instantly alert to any tripping hazards or too-close cars, but nothing else registered on visual scans.

Although, once the traffic lights and houses were behind her, she did notice the old roads. There were a handful of them out this far. Out where, when she was running without her music, the only sounds were wind and birdsong. These roads cut through the woodsy parts. No sidewalks, not even any curbs. Tracy was often in the mood to go somewhere she'd never explored before. Today especially so.

So at the next road she came to, she turned right. Whatever was down here, today she'd add it to her mental map.



*~*~*~*



It had only been a few moments ago when she'd started getting bored and scared at the same time, and was thinking it might be good to turn around and head home. There was nothing but trees down this route. Tall, thin ones that grew alongside the road like a foreboding fence. It was so silent here that she had to keep turning her music down. Her normal volume was meant to compete with traffic (but not too much; it was a matter of safety to always hear her surroundings), but in this place it felt like the music was just thinly covering emptiness. Nature was supposed to be refreshing and cheerful. Instead, the trees here were bare, dry and ugly. This was not an enchanted glen where nonev squirrels and birds would frolic about with Snow White. This was the scant bit of nature the city planners would begrudgingly allow. Not enough room for most animals. But there might be homeless guys camping out deep back in the brush. 'Not that poor people are bad,' she reprimanded herself. Just that, well, she really didn't know what she'd do if some haggard-looking drunk came stumbling out in front of her, asking for money. She tapped her pockets. Apparently she'd left her wallet at home with her backpack without realizing it.

There was a point where she was internally debating whether to write this path off as a dead end. For all she knew, it could be nothing but trees, trees, trees for the next seventy miles. She might run all night and never come to anything else. Even though it was only a little past four, it already felt late in the evening.

That might have decided things if not for her current song ending just then. There were five seconds of silence between it and the next, and in that brief gap Tracy heard a sound like running water, or static. As the next electro-dance number started thumping in her earbuds, she recognized it as the rumblehum of the freeway.

'Huh. I didn't realize it looped around all the way back here.' But freeways meant off-ramps, and thus main roads running parallel. Maybe she didn't have to go back after all. Maybe forging ahead just a little further would reveal a path that'd take her all the way around in a circle. Good. She hated doubling back almost more than running the same route twice in two days.

And her reasoning paid off. By the end of the next song, she knew exactly where she was. She'd come to the prize at the bottom of her spur-of-the-moment choice.

Tracy had run far enough north to come up on the old shopping mall from behind. She'd passed it a dozen times in the car. Even ran past it a few. It had been closed since before her family moved here. She'd never seen its butt-end before. How fascinating.

This road must have been for truckers to bring in supplies, she reasoned. The trees to her left abruptly cut away into a yellowed field, which became a vast, crumbling parking lot. The dividers were skewed and the rain had eroded off their yellow paint. Weeds grew everywhere. The concrete had cracked into big sections that looked like icebergs. If she'd been on a bike, this lot would've bounced her right off her handlebars. As it was, she kept to the edge anyway. Lots of things to trip on here. Even after being vacant so long, there was still garbage and chip bags and pop cans laying around.

The back of the mall had four huge receiving bays. Red sliding doors as big as the side of her house. Tracy could hear the freeway drivers' drone above her music now. From their vantage point, the mall still showed off its storefronts. Flashy architecture; gold and mulberry letters in fancy fonts. Plus the towering sign at the corner listing all the anchor stores. Tracy could just barely see its arched tip beyond the roof. Back here though, it was all boxy and dank. Like a Hollywood set you could see behind to all the boring parts. The dumpsters were gone, but as she got closer she could see the rusted footprints where they'd stood. There were still some wooden pallets lying around though, looking severely rained on.

Tracy had slowed out of step with her music without realizing it. Her nose and tail twitched as she scanned all the details of this derelict retail behemoth. This place might as well have had a big sign up saying, 'You're not supposed to be here'. And, since she was a kid, that drew her in like a magnet.

Not much could pull her away from running. Rarer still was something that deserved turning off her music for. But Tracy thought this place earned the honor. She unplugged her ears, wrapped the cord around her player and pocketed it. Her eyes remained glued open as she slowly approached. Out here, her soles scuffing against concrete was loud enough she swore she could hear it echo.

Tracy traced her finger along the back wall of the loading bay. Lots of graffiti here. LOTS of graffiti. Mostly names, usually unreadable. One or two were done with some skill and color. There was a badly-drawn skull, and a swastika, and a dick. "Bo-ring." Though someone had drawn a bat with googly eyes and jelly wings. That was creative enough to get a nod of approval.

She stopped at the edge of the pit where the trucks pulled in. A huge sunken wedge, like the tapered bottom of a swimming pool. She trembled a bit. If she slipped down there, she'd end up in a huge, slick pile of dead leaves and trash. That would not be good. She continued on, determined to at least explore the full perimeter. She glanced occasionally at the ground. Maybe she'd find some dropped change. Or not. Maybe she'd just have a nice cooldown intermission before restarting her run. Now that she knew where she was, it would be a snap to take Chambers west and shortcut down Lewis right to her backyard.

Tracy actually did find a penny. Then she found a way in.

She stopped, realizing the implications of the askew board immediately. This was an employee entrance into one of the big clothing stores. Payne's, it still said above on the awning. The glass had been smashed out and someone had boarded it up. But the boards had been thoroughly graffiti'd, and one of them had been pried sideways. Maybe by looters, maybe teenagers. Tracy felt her tail frizz up as she stared at the little gap. The November breeze pricked at her neck.

The mall had been closed for years. If this hadn't been fixed by now, then for sure no one was keeping watch over the place anymore. And this entrance was far enough away from the roadside that no one passing by was likely to spot it. Tracy's heart quickened.

'There could be people in there.' The teenagers who'd spraypainted everything. Or maybe a whole colony of homeless folks. Or maybe just a hell of a lot of spiders.

Tensing herself to run like a fired bullet if there was any response, she leaned down and yelled, "HELLOOOOO!!!" into the hole.

No response. None. Silence, except for the background mumble of the freeway cars.

"I shouldn't do this," Tracy told herself. "It's stupid."

But she knew even as she was saying the words that they wouldn't stop her. They were token acknowledgment of what her parents would have said if they were there. But they weren't. 'And I'm fast enough to outrun anything bad in here, I'm sure of it,' Tracy reassured herself.

For a slim young chipmunk, it was no trouble at all to squirm past the hole in the boards.



*~*~*~*



For a moment, her eyes saw nothing but dull, dusty shapes. She stopped and let her pupils refocus.

This was a slim passage to the back stockroom of the store. Tracy threaded her way through it, wishing she had a flashlight. Once inside, she marveled at the towering emptiness of the place. At one point there must have been big shelves full of coats and dresses, and now there was only scuffs on the floor. Everything was gone. She kicked a beer can and heard it echo. Squinting, she could tell that this was the place trespassers usually kept to. In the corner was an oil drum, and judging by the extensive smoke damage up the walls and ceiling, people had used it as a makeshift furnace. She wrinkled her nose at the smell of fire, cigarette butts, spilled drinks, and maybe even a little vomit. But these smells were dry. If they'd been fresh she might've turned tail and run. But it seemed whoever had been here had stopped coming long ago.

A faint change in the dimness led Tracy towards Payne's proper. Here was an even bigger empty space. And since so many of the walls were angled glass, she could see a bit better. Up ahead was almost as bright as day: the mall's roof had skylights.

This had once been a clothing store. Now it was an art gallery. Tracy walked slowly past pillars that mannequins had posed on, neck craned to appreciate the graffiti murals that reached all the way to the ceiling. The scrawlings outside had been primitive; rushed by the fear of being spotted and caught. In here the artists could take their time. Here was a four-foot tall bewildered-looking cartoon skull. Here was a snake wrapping around an oil derrick. Here was a kaleidoscope array of hearts. Here was a lion hunk curling his arms romantically around a twiggy mousefemme. Tracy stopped, blushed, and stared at that one for a while. The big pred was all muscly, with a mane as big as the sun. The mouse looked blissfully helpless, nearly disappearing in the fur blanket of his embrace. Tracy's hands kneaded at the hem of her shorts.

'Okay. Never mind. Can't spend all day in here. Gotta explore the rest.' She hustled herself past the stimulating painting towards the front of the store. Wasn't difficult. This place had been cleaned out. No more clothing racks, shelves, registers, or even any stray safety pins. Looking up she could see that the ceiling tiles had even been pried loose. Slashed ends of wires were hanging down. She remembered a news story once about metal thieves. Furs who sold it for scrap. This mall must've been a goldmine for them.

For a moment Tracy worried that the rest of the mall might be inaccessible. What if the front of the store was all locked up? But that was definitely not a problem. Like a lot of mall businesses, Payne's had a sliding metal gate for protection at closing time. Or rather, it had had. Tracy could see it'd been ripped right off its hinges. 'Thanks, scrappers,' she thought as she stepped through. In the store's display window, way in the far corner, she could see a single dusty mannequin foot.

Finally she was in the mall's main concourse. She stopped and gawked silently. The ceiling was twenty feet above her: a glass spiderweb that let in light and showed off the underside of pigeon poops. Tracy was on the bottom of two floors. To her right was a mountainous escalator next to an oasis of benches and toppled plant pots. To her left was a completely gutted toy store. She could only tell its former contents by the clowns-and-balloons carpet pattern. Above her, the second floor was a balcony ring, with a glass barrier all the way around to keep people from plummeting off. Lots of little stores up there, but she couldn't see them clearly. She'd need to go onwards and upwards for that.

She had never been in a place this big all by herself before. The escalators and walkways should have been full of people. Their lack of presence made her feel even tinier.

Tracy realized her paws were trembling.

'Okay, I need to stop that. I'm eleven. I'm not a baby.' She filled her lungs and bellowed, "ANYONE IN HERE!?"

She froze and listened for a response, tensed to bolt.

No one yelled back, 'Get out of here' or 'This is our place.' The only reply she got was her own echo.

"See? It's abandoned," she told herself. And then, the realization, "Which means... it's all mine."

Tracy's expression of wary fear slowly melted into a smile of triumph.

The entire mall was hers. A gigantic birthday present for her to unwrap.

A giddy giggle escaped her lips as she dashed off. Not back to the exit passage, but forward, deeper. The expedition had begun.



*~*~*~*



Once upon a time, the Heaven Plaza Mall had been crammed to the rafters with clothes, jewelry, music, books, movies, stuffed toys, and other consumer goodies. Now its most abundant resource was empty space. That was just fine by Tracy. After years of being told, 'Don't run indoors!', here was a place where she could disobey that rule to her heart's content. Her sneakers made squeaky toots across the smooth white floors. Miles and miles of tile. She could run laps in here, she realized. Come up here in the deep wintertime and zip back and forth from end to end all day.

After a quick skim before the full exploration, she'd determined that the mall's outline roughly corresponded to a three-leaf clover. Sort of. Each leaf had long stems connecting them to the central stalk. Since she'd entered from the back, she'd come in at the top leaf, the biggest one. The bottom stalk was the main entrance, where the food court and some of the fancier jewelry shops were (not that there was any food or jewelry left in them). Long corridors branched off from the middle, where a once-spectacular fountain had now become an oversized concrete bathtub with busted PVC pipe sticking out. There were ministores and tipped pushcarts all along the side stems, leading to two huge rival department stores as the third and second leaves. From where Tracy had entered, Payne's was at the top of a double-decker cylinder of stores. Only the center leaf had top and bottom sections.

Definitely not much left to scavenge anymore. This place had been picked clean. Sometimes even counters and doors had been hauled away. The biggest salvage she spotted was a computer monitor lying on its side in an electronics store. She guessed it was so bulky and out-of-date that nobody had a use for it. Aside from that, the only other items to stumble across were litter. Empty spraypaint cans and crumpled cigarette packs.

The skylights let in plenty of sunshine. Though Tracy knew her time here wasn't unlimited. It'd be getting dark in half an hour or so, and with no electricity in this place, she knew she'd be up a creek trying to find her way out again.

Even that worry couldn't dim her exuberance. She really was deliciously all by herself in here. She could screech and holler all she wanted as she blazed along the aisles. It was fun to roam around the deserted stores and guess at what they'd sold. That one could've had shoes or books. The warm brown colors just had that 'look' to it. Here was an ice cream parlor: she could tell by the display islands with gaping holes to hold the tubs. Similarly, a bulk candy store with the bins all emptied. The jewelry stores had nice carpets completely littered with broken glass from hooligans smashing the cases. Conversely, most of the wall and ceiling glass was intact. Tracy saw lots of cracks from people throwing stuff, but rarely had they succeeded against the strong stuff. Looking up, she even saw tiny dents in the skylights, and corresponding chunks of brick far beneath.

Another way to guess what stores had sold was by the names. Sometimes signs had been pried off, but most were still there. Some were explicit: Far East Healing Spa, Daystone Realty. Many were more poetic: Metropolitan Man, Jumbles, Periscope!, Up 8th Avenue. She guessed the artsy ones were mostly clothing stores. Tracy herself didn't own a lot of clothes, unlike some of her classmates who seemed obsessed with them. Tracy cared about colors, but so long as her outfits allowed mobility, she wasn't picky. She burst out laughing at one of the signs. Vandals had scraped away letters, turning Funktown Boutique into Fuk But.

After thoroughly surveying all four arms of the ground floor, Tracy decided to head on up to the second. She got a nasty fright though. After looking around for escalators, she spotted them and made a beeline. But a smashed-in whale-shaped kiddie ride distracted her, and she nearly ran headlong into a hole. The escalator steps had been pried up, revealing a dark canyon underneath. Standing at the edge, Tracy stared down and panted for a moment. She was very glad there were stairs right beside.

Up above, the second level was entirely balcony. No floor in the middle, so shoppers could peer down at everything below. Tracy could see the same variety of emptied-out shops lining the perimeter of the loop. Definitely an arcade over there: a humongous open space with square imprints in the floor and lots of outlets. A wig store with goofy faces painted on the remaining plastic heads. The tattoo & furbrushing place still had a poster of designs plastered to the window. Tracy wondered what she'd look like with some little gold stars and moons decorating her stripes.

One of the things she'd failed to appreciate when she'd first entered was that the mall must have shut down shortly after December. On the bottom floor, stretching all the way up past the observation railings of the upper level, was a massive artificial Christmas tree. Standing at the edge of the walkway connecting the left and right sides of the balcony, Tracy gawked in awe at it. The tip nearly touched the skylights! She wondered why no one had taken it away. Maybe it was too big to bother with. She looked down and could see the base of the trunk, where big shiny fake presents had undoubtedly been clustered around. There was a little shack that probably held Santa's chair. Plus an indentation went all around the area, which she thought might have been the tracks of a little train. How fun!

Tracy was completely delighted by all this and wished she could have seen this big tree at the height of its brilliance. It was probably festooned with silver tinsel and colored lights and beautiful ornaments-

She stopped and stared. Deep in the branches, up near the top, one lone ornament was left. One golden ball.

'Oh that'd be so cool to take home!' she thought. 'All the others got picked off, but I bet that one was too high up for anyone to get.' She blanched as the nonev part of her suddenly yearned to go climbing up those branches. She was a modern chipmunk! She'd break her neck! Who knew how stable this old tree was? It wasn't even a real tree. It might collapse at any second. Besides, she'd have to go all the way back downstairs and start at the trunk.

'Or maybe not.'

A dangerous idea had occurred to her. The tree was not far from the railing. More than arms' length, true, but certainly no further than five feet.

She could jump five feet. Sure. She'd done it in gym class.

'No! That's suicide!' she admonished herself. She clutched the rail and looked past the glass barrier, all the way down to the lower floor. 'I'd break my legs. Or my skull. And besides, I'd have to jump over this thing first. It's up to my chest. I could never...'

Her arguments died out because, as she glanced to the left, there was a bench right in the center of the walkway.

Her brain saw it step-by-step: A running start towards the bench. One hop onto it. Another to the railing. Then a leap to the tree and grab on tight.

Her pulse was pounding in her ears. 'No. NononononononononoNO.'

But she was gonna. Oh, it was just too tempting. She knew damn well her athletic little rodent body could accomplish it. And no grownups were around to stop her. It was just a matter of convincing her brain to let her.

She shook her head and walked away, back towards the elevator. This was nonsense. This was crazy.

Once she'd gotten sixty feet, she realized it was the perfect distance for that running start she needed. She turned around. The path was clear. Nothing in her way. A perfect straight shot from the bench to the railing to the tree. And she'd even get a prize to show for it.

'How am I gonna get down afterwards?'

Instead of answering, she decided to let her future self figure that out.

Tracy pulled oxygen into her lungs and leaned forward into her first lunging step. She felt her rational, cautious self shout warnings, but her speed soon left them behind. She blanked her thoughts. The sure way to fail any physical challenge was to overthink it, she knew. 'Just blank your mind, trust your body, and do it.' Her sneakers hugged against the tile with each step. Her heartbeat pounded in her ears. She rounded the angle from the concourse to the walkway, keeping her eyes focused on the tree.

First jump. Her body left the ground and her rubber sole gripped the cast iron rungs of the bench's seat.

Second jump. More of a straight-up hop really. The railing was cylindrical, but the round edge actually helped her pivot for the correct angle.

In that instant, her whole body extended over the edge. Suspended over disaster, held only by friction. Her leg pistoned back against the rail, launching herself forward. Third jump.

For one microsecond, she was flying. Nothing but air above and below her. No thoughts or fear in her mind.

Then suddenly she was hugging branches like her life depended on it, which it absolutely did.

Her breathing was a loud, jittery flutter. Her adrenaline-laced blood raced through her veins. She didn't dare open her eyes yet. Her fingers dug into metal-reinforced plastic. Fake needles scratched her face.

When she finally dared to look, all she could see was green.

'I did it.'

'I actually...'

'OHMYGODIACTUALLYDIDITI'MINACHRISTMASTREE!!!!'

Tracy let out a shriek of mixed terror and triumph. She allowed herself to unclench, and realized the branches were a lot sturdier than she'd expected. Some, at least. Most were whippy and fluffy, to look like a real evergreen, but some were like ladder rungs. It was lucky she hadn't impaled herself on one of those. She looked upwards. For a few moments she couldn't see her goal, and hoped her impact hadn't knocked it loose. It'd be the saddest thing in the world to look down and see the little gold ball smashed on the floor below.

'Nope, there it is!' She kept her eyes on the little metallic flash, and only had to climb two more ladder-branches to reach it. It felt amazing to wrap her paw around the smooth plastic. It was actually cool to the touch, and bigger than she'd expected. Softball-sized. For a moment she worried it wouldn't fit in her pocket. But she got a firm grip on the branch above and wiggled her hip to shove it in.

"Now I just have to get down."

Blessedly, that too turned out to be easy. She mostly kept her eyes closed and descended by feel. She didn't want to look down and get dizzy, plus the softer branches kept smacking her in the face anyway. The ladder-branches were arranged in a crisscross pattern, so she ended up climbing down in a clockwise circle, like going down the outside of a spiral staircase. After a few tense minutes she reached out her foot for the next step and felt nothing but empty air. An instant's panic. When she craned her neck and dared to look, she was three feet from the ground. She sighed a giggle of relief. When she dropped down, she very nearly kissed the floor like people in cartoons. The thought of germs stopped that idea. Though she did stay hunched over with her palms touching the tile for almost a minute. Just reassuring herself she was back on gravity's good side. She'd done it. The impossibly crazy idea she'd had a few moments ago was already over and she'd won. Her slowly-steadying breaths were mixed with gasped, disbelieving laughter.

Finally she stood up. She hugged herself tight. 'That was nuts, but you did it. And it felt INCREDIBLE!' She patted the bulge in her back pocket and grinned effervescently.

She also realized that, after such a heart-pounder of a moment, she needed a relief-pee. Looking around, there was actually a restroom in sight.

She trotted towards it, and realized halfway there that this place wouldn't have running water. And the toilets were probably ripped out of the floor anyway. On the other hand, the sunlight was beginning to fade and it was the last thing she hadn't checked out, so why not?

Still high as a kite, Tracy hardly noticed the picked-corkless bulletin board that had once held lost dog notices and job offers. There were grimy squares on the tile where pop machines had stood, near a phone kiosk with the receiver yanked out. Tracy turned the corner at the Ladies side, and before she'd even gotten a look at the room itself her nose was wrinkling. Seemed someone had been using the facilities here whether they were functional or not. Tracy held her nose and peeked. Bleah. Pink tile, doorless stalls, more graffiti, and stains she did NOT want to identify.

She turned to bolt, but happened to notice the Gentleman's sign on the other side. Smell or no smell, she had to check this out. Boys' urinals were fascinating things. And she felt certain this side would be stinkier than the girls'.

Though when she took a sniff, it wasn't pee she detected. It was that same fire smell from the oil drum in the Payne's stockroom. 'Maybe someone had a bonfire and sacrificed the toilets,' she thought with a chuckle.

When she entered the room, she froze and a shiver clawed its way up her back. The floor was sunken in towards the center here, as if someone from hell had stretched it down. There was gray ash covering everything. And there were rocks and sticks in a big pile in the middle except... Except oh jesus they weren't rocks and sticks they were bones. Tracy's eyes widened in horror. Bones. Femurs and pelvises and a hundred tiny phalanges. And skulls. Little skulls. These had been children. There were dozens of them here.

Tracy lost the ability to breathe. Her throat glued shut. Her heart pumped pure icewater. For a moment she was 100% paralyzed.

Then instinct tore control away and she backed out of there as quick as lightning. She heard a bursting crunch and something stung her buttcheek. A high-pitched scream leapt out of her. Then she was running.

Tearing around the corner away from the room of bones. The sacrificial pit. She ran past the Christmas tree. She ran past the display case with the lonely mannequin foot. She ran past the graffiti art. She ran past the smoky stockroom. She aimed herself like a bullet towards the bright patch of light beyond the pried board. Outside. Safety. She lunged and squirmed through without hardly breaking stride.

Then fresh air was in her lungs and the November wind curled around her body, shocking her back to consciousness. She had been on total autopilot for a moment there. Zero conscious thought, just the instinctive programming to get away from the bad place. The unsafe place. The killing place.

But she was out now. Not stopping. Running across the parking lot. Free. She wouldn't even take Chambers and Lewis home, because that would mean turning back and going past the mall. She didn't ever want to see the mall again. She would close her eyes when Daddy drove past it from now on. She would backtrace her route through the woods and go to bed the instant she got home and never come back this way again NEVER EVER EVER.

"Hey! Little girl! Stop! Are you allright?"



*~*~*~*



Tracy pivoted like she'd been shot.

Breathless, her vision swam with dizziness for a moment. There was a man running after her. She stiffened to run again.

But then she noticed his pressed blue uniform. The flashlight he was holding. His cap with a gold badge. A security guard. A fox, or maybe a wolf? Hard to tell with his soot-black fur. Though there was nothing but gentle concern in his expression.

Then she was running towards him, gasping to speak. When she plowed into him, the guard stumbled back several steps, using his tail to keep balance. Her arms were around his waist as tight as she'd held the Christmas tree branches.

"Hey! Whoa! Calm down. Were you poking around in there and had a fright?"

She looked up into his kind face, not caring for an instant that he was Pred. His starchy, soft uniform meant he was a good grownup. Someone she could tell. She tried to force words past her thrumming heartbeat, but all she could get out was, "Murder! Murder! Murder!"

The fox guard's eyebrows went up. "That's pretty serious. How about we go sit down on that bench over there, you can catch your breath, and we'll figure out if you saw something real or just got spooked by shadows, okay?"

For a moment she was irritated that he didn't believe her. But of course it made sense. What was more likely, a kid getting scared in a scary place? Or actual, real, bloody awful murders happening in a safe, cozy town like theirs?

Tracy didn't remember seeing a bench before, but the fox guided her with a paw on her shoulder to one just at the edge of the parking lot. Green-painted wood, next to a bus stop sign.

"You sure are lucky, Little Miss Chipmunk. I come out here once a month to make sure nobody's burned down the place. I was just about to leave when you came running out. Fast as lightning!"

Hearing that actually did calm her down a bit. It was just about the nicest compliment she could receive. She nodded gratitude to him.

The fox guard eased down onto the bench and patted the seat beside him. "Here. Tell me everything."

Tracy nodded again, bent to sit down, and jolted away in pain.

"What happened!?" the fox asked.

Wincing, Tracy reached around to her pocket. That bang when she'd fled from the restroom. She'd backed into the wall so hard, her ornament had shattered.

She pulled out a pawful of curved gold shards, and started crying.

"Oh," the fox said, ears drooping.

"I'm s-sorry. I guess I shoplifted it." She looked up at him, wondering if he'd have to arrest her now.

Instead, he gave her a smile that said he didn't mind at all. "I'm just amazed you found anything left in there worth taking. It's fine. You're not in trouble."

She nodded. She looked down at the pieces of her smashed souvenir. No way to repair it. It'd be a cracked-up mess even if she did glue it all together. She turned her paw over and let the pieces tinkle to the sidewalk.

Then she slumped onto the bench and slid herself against the guardsman's side. He put his arm around her, and she cried some more.

She knew it was selfish and awful of her to be caring about her ornament at a time like this. There were skulls in that bathroom. A whole pile of them. Dead kids. What did a stupid plastic ball matter compared to that?

Except... it was hers. She won it.

A black-furred paw rubbed gently up and down her shoulder. "Tell me what happened."

So Tracy did.



*~*~*~*



It didn't take long. The young chipmunk stuck to the facts. She kept her voice calm, even though it trembled at places. She was relieved the guard had no interest in punishing her for trespassing. He only cared about the bones, and that she'd gotten out safely. It also helped that he was fascinating to look at. Definitely a fox from the shape of his face, but his fur was almost totally black except for some orange blazes around his ears and tail. His eyes were orange too; a color strong as Halloween pumpkins. While Tracy talked, she picked the remaining bits of pointy plastic out of her pocket. She decided not to tell the nice security guard where she'd gotten the ornament from. As if he'd believe her anyway.

"...and then I just ran. I didn't even think about it. I ran as fast as I could. I- I admit, at first I thought I was gonna run home and hide under the covers and not tell anyone. Just, not even think about it ever again." She looked up from her position lying against his side, to see if he'd be ashamed of her.

He wasn't. "That's normal," he said gently. Everything about him was gentle. And his voice was smooth and sweet as peanut butter. "After a traumatic incident, denial's pretty common. Some things are deeply uncomfortable to think about, and difficult to face. You're showing more bravery right now than you realize, Tracy."

"Oh." Her cheeks flushed. She liked how it sounded when he said her name. "Thank you." Shyly she looked away. Across the empty parking lot to the hole in the boards. She shivered. "What's going to happen now?"

"Well, I'm not a real cop," he admitted, pointing out the logo of Lock Solid Security embroidered on his sleeve. "But I know a few. I'll take a drive down to the station and tell them what you told me. You don't have to come along unless you want to. You can be an anonymous tipster."

Tracy felt both relieved and disappointed. "Really?"

"It's up to you," he said. "Depends on whether or not you want to take credit for breaking the case- which you deserve to," he patted her paw, "-or if you'd really rather just forget this. You can go home and no one will ever know you were here. My lips are sealed." He made a zipper motion across his muzzle.

She giggled lightly, then sighed. She sat up straight and he took his arm away. She let him know with a glance she was grateful for the hug. Tracy stretched her legs, then her arms, then she looked far down the truck road with the tall trees on either side. "I'm not sure what I want."

He glanced at the bus stop sign. "That's okay. We can stay here until you decide. I'm not even sure the buses stop here anymore. No reason to."

With the mall closed, that made sense. Tracy leaned forward, folding her arms and resting them across her lap. Making herself smaller against the chilly breeze. "Part of me wants to go with you. I feel like I ought to tell the cops and take them back here and point out the bones myself. Like, to make sure they see them? Maybe even to make sure I saw them. You know in movies when the main guy sees a thing, and when he tells people about it they go back and it's not really there? What if it was just some shadows? What if they were, I dunno, Halloween props?"

He shrugged. "That's possible. Though if they were, no one would be upset at you for reporting it. Much better to check and be sure. And wouldn't that be the best outcome? Wouldn't it be better if no one had died and it was just a silly Halloween prank?"

"That's a good point," she nodded. "I'm not sure why anyone would do that though. Maybe some high schoolers doing a scene for a play? Or some fake ritual to scare themselves with?"

"Plausible. You're a very smart young lady."

Tracy smiled bashfully at that. "...Thank you." She realized she was grinning and quickly hid her buckteeth away, embarrassed by their hugeness. She looked back down the road again. Home was only an hour's run away. Nothing, really. "On the other hand, I'm glad you said I could just leave. I'm good at running away -I mean, good at running." That slip made her cheeks red. She wondered if she'd just said something more true about herself than she was comfortable with facing.

A soft, soothing paw on her shoulder. "It's not running away. Are you a police officer? A homicide detective? Or are you still in grade school?"

"Middle school," she corrected.

He held up his hands apologetically. "My mistake. Point is, you don't need to worry yourself over this. You made the discovery, you told someone, and that's your obligation finished. You've already done a good job. I'm proud of you."

She squirmed a little, pleased to an inexplicable degree to hear him say that. She rubbed her legs. Her shins were getting a little frosty out here. Shorts were only good in November if you kept yourself moving. "Maybe I will then. If it's okay? Honestly, I think it's more that I don't want my mom and dad to know where I was today! They'd throw a fit. They'd faint!"

The fox chuckled. "I have seen enough over-worried parents to not argue with you on that. If that's your choice, then go on home. Nobody has to know. The authorities will handle this."

"Okay." Tracy nodded and readied herself to get up. Her tush was a bit sore from the hard bench anyway. "Though..." She settled back down as something else occurred to her. "I do want to know what ends up happening. Like, if they find out who those kids were? And if their parents get told?"

"That shows compassion," the fox guard said approvingly. "I'll see if I can pop you a letter about it sometime. Or probably it'll be on the news tomorrow. Maybe even tonight."

"Oh right!" That should have been obvious. A big story like this? A buncha bones turn up in an abandoned shopping mall? Probably sat there undiscovered for years? The news wouldn't shut up about it for months. Years maybe. Tracy could watch it at the dinner table and pretend to be as shocked as everyone else.

"Allright. So you've decided?"

"Mm-hmm." Though Tracy didn't say it, part of her wanted even more to stay on this bench, talking to this nice security guard. He was really good at consoling frightened little chipmunks.

He could see it in her eyes and her smile anyway. "Okay. Go on then. Run home safe. Somewhere out there, there's a child killer on the loose."

Tracy had turned and grabbed the armrest to stand up, but then she froze as solid as cold marble.

Something about the way he'd said that. Something wrong. And suddenly she knew. She knew totally and completely.

Pieces began filling in. How coincidental was it that he just happened to pick today to do his inspection? He said he'd drive her to the police station, yet the parking lot was empty. And the way he'd said those last few words to her. Meant to sound like a warning, but was there a hint of a tease in there? The ghost of a laugh at having fooled her? Having sat right next to her, talking sweet, while the whole time he'd known the instant he'd seen her running what she'd been afraid of?

It was nearly impossible to move. Time crawled like a nightmare.

Tracy turned her head to look at him, expecting to see a slasher smile. Expecting those orange eyes to be glowing, filled with a cruelly playful glint that would tell her, 'You found my secret. Now you have to join the others in the bone pile.'

Except...

That wasn't what she saw on his face. Her fear ebbed somewhat, replaced by confusion. The fox's expression was bashful, sheepish. His posture on the bench had not changed. There was no menace in his body language. Everything about him said, 'Aw gosh darn it. Ya caught me.'

Her blood had turned so cold she no longer noticed the November frost. Wide-eyed, all she could say was, "You...?"

He was inclined at the other end of the bench with one arm across the back, the other lying in his lap. He didn't make a move. The wind rustled his sleeve, that was all. "Yes," he said simply.

She shuddered. What Tracy was feeling at that moment, far more than anger and almost as much as fear, was heartbreak. The very idea that this kind, gentle, soft-voiced fox had done such evil things. Had tricked her. Had lied to her. She didn't want it to be possible.

The moment made them both into statues. Tracy knew she was motionless from fright, but didn't understand why he wasn't moving either. Killers were supposed to pounce on their prey. That was how it happened in horror films. But as Tracy kept her eyes locked on his, he didn't even seem to blink.

Worse still, his expression didn't change either. His eyes still showed no hatred towards her. No hunger. They were perfectly placid. Almost... concerned? Was that possible? Could he be lying even now? Could anyone fake such sincerity?

Summoning all her inner strength, Tracy forced her throat to unclench. She tried to speak boldly, but fear made her voice waver anyway. "I don't believe you."

The slightest tilt of his ears. "About what part?" he asked.

Tracy had her paw on the armrest and clenched it tight. "A-about you being the killer. You can't be. You just can't."

His gaze radiated apology. "I am. Sorry."

Tracy's jaw trembled. Something throbbed at the back of her head. She began to wonder if she was actually trapped in a bad dream. Her eyes darted up and down, scanning the fox's every detail. It did not add up. Something had to be a lie here. It simply was not possible that he could be a bloodthirsty killer of children, yet also be sitting here calmly, seemingly as harmless as a stuffed toy.

Suddenly she realized that he might be playing a game with her. Like a cat with a mouse. He was waiting for something from her. Testing her.

Well, allright.

There was something she was very good at. She'd even said so a moment ago. And she'd never in her life had a better reason to. The question had finally entered her mind: 'Why aren't I running?'

He still had not moved. His left arm was still draped across the back of the bench. His right was still at rest on his lap. His posture was relaxed. If she popped up into a sprint, maybe she could get away before he could nab her. Even better: she could feint! Make like she was about to run towards the trees, but actually grab hold of the bench and turn herself around towards the mall. Get to the main road where people could see her. She'd read about that in a Stranger Danger book.

Allright, that was the plan. She just had to keep looking afraid (which she was) and not give away that she was tensing her muscles to spring.

She stared at him. He looked back at her.

The wind blew dry leaves past their feet. The freeway hummed.

Keeping her face perfectly still, Tracy drew in a deep breath. Slowly, slowly, slowly. She cemented her grip on the bench. The metal was cold as ice. Almost ready. It didn't look like he had a gun, but if he did she could zig-zag. Almost ready. And...

Tracy exploded into motion! Her muscles launched her up onto her feet, taking a running step towards the fox, then yanking on the bench as hard as her young muscles would allow to spin herself in the opposite direction. Any second now he'd pounce and-

She glanced back. He hadn't moved an inch. Not even a twitch.

He was still sitting on the bench in the exact same position. Even looking up at her without surprise. His expression asked, 'Did you think I'd chase you?'

Tracy stopped. She stood looking back over her shoulder at him.

Everything about him said that if she continued running, he would let her go.

The young chipmunk stared at the fox for several more moments. Neither of them said a word. And then, not understanding why, Tracy sat back down on the bench.

The fox showed no reaction, positive or negative, to this decision.

She bunched herself into the corner, knees tight together and arms wrapped around her middle. The cold was starting to sink into her skin. She couldn't take the tension anymore. She couldn't take not knowing. So even though it was the stupidest question possible, even though she knew there was no good answer, even though a tear fell from her eye as she opened her mouth, she couldn't stop herself from asking, "Are you going to kill me?"

The fox looked back at her with nothing but compassion. When he replied, it was a slow, careful whisper. "That depends. Do you want me to?"

She almost had to laugh at such a crazy question. "Of course not!"

"Okay then," he replied.

And as much as that baffled her, she thought that maybe she understood his motionlessness. Maybe he actually was trying to show he meant her no harm. Maybe he really would allow her escape.

Lightning quick, she feinted as if she was about to start running again.

His only reaction was to keep looking at her with those gentle, concerned eyes.

Tracy slumped against the green wooden slats. More tears gathered, blurring her vision. "I don't know what's going on. I don't know what to do."

A very slight nod of understanding. "Tracy?"

"Huh?"

"Do you mind if I move my arm? It's starting to fall asleep."

She was bewildered all over again. "No, I don't mind."

"Thanks." He watched her carefully as he took his arm off the bench and curled it into his lap beside the other. She flinched a little. But she didn't run away in panic. "If you want to ask me anything, I'll answer truthfully."

She blinked, splashing her tears down her cheeks. "Why should I believe you?"

A small shrug. "That's up to you."

She drew her legs up to her chest, wrapping her arms around them and curling herself into a tight ball. She rubbed her paws briskly up and down her shins to warm them. "Did you really kill someone?"

A slow nod. "Yes. Several someones. Everything you saw in the bathroom was real."

"So why... Why aren't you trying to shut me up right now? Jump on me? Pull out a knife and cut me?"

He looked confused. "Should I?"

She shook her head angrily. "You say you're a killer but you're not acting like a killer! It doesn't make any sense to me! You're acting all... nice!"

He smiled. "Well thank you."

Tracy growled. "You're confusing me!!" she exploded.

His ears folded back. "I am sorry about that. I really don't mean to upset you. I thought I could fool you with the security guard routine. I thought I'd convinced you you'd already done your part, and you could go home and things were handled. You could go off happy, and my secret would stay hidden, and things would work out for both of us."

Tracy wiped a paw across her eyes. "And I ruined that by figuring it out."

"Hey, don't feel bad about that. Don't be sorry for being smart. I got overconfident. I got clumsy at the end, that's my fault."

"But you..." She sniffled. "You're acting like you'll still let me go. But you can't now, right? I know the secret."

He tilted his head. "Is there any reason I shouldn't let you go if you want to? You already said you wouldn't tell. I trust you."

That stung for some reason. Hearing something so kind, from someone she was supposed to be fearing and fleeing, caused so much confusion it was tearing her up.

The fox chewed his lip, wanting to give her a hug to console her, but knowing she needed him to keep his distance.

"Why wouldn't you just kill me and get it over with like all the rest?" she sobbed.

Ah. Now that was a good question. A trace of a hopeful smile came to his muzzle. "Because you're afraid. I don't like for cubs to be afraid. In fact, none of my victims have ever died unless it was their wish to."

She became alert at that. Wiping her eyes again, she fixed her gaze on him, hunting for any trace of a lie. "That doesn't make sense. Why would they let you kill them?" A possibility occurred. "Were they, like, cancer kids? Are you a suicide doctor?"

"Actually, one of them was. And I sort of am. But the real answer's much more complicated and..." he turned his eyes away, "rather selfish."

Tracy was intrigued. He sounded more ashamed of that than the actual confession of killing.

The fox looked back at her. His hands were now clasped together nervously. "Tell you what. You know part of my secret. If you want, I'll share all of it. But first, I want to know about you too."

She recoiled a bit, squishing herself even tighter into the corner of the bench. "Me!? Why?"

His throat quivered slightly as he answered. "Because when I first saw you, I thought you might be right to know the full truth. You might fit. But I want to be sure. I don't want to simply trust my feelings. You don't have to tell me any more than you're comfortable with. I just want to know you. What kind of furson you are. And if you don't want to share anything personal, it's also perfectly okay if you get up and walk away and never come back here. I just ask, if you do go, please don't come back here."

By now there were so many questions swarming around Tracy's head she felt like she was drowning. Of course her danger alarms were going off. Of course this could easily be a trap. Maybe to blackmail her. He could be lying about ALL of this. But...

He really did look sad. And concerned. And sincere.

And Tracy knew she could run. She could run at any time if she felt scared.

And... maybe she had been wanting someone to talk to for a long time now anyway.

She set her lip and grunted, somewhat irritated with herself for giving in. She was probably being gullible and stupid. She was probably going to get caught and murdered. But some part of her was starting to get the feeling that she'd stumbled onto something unimaginable. Something that was once-in-a-lifetime, whether good or bad. Maybe it was worth dipping further into. Just a little.

"My name is Tracy," she said, and winced like always before giving the rest, "...Vanderbrooke. I know it sounds like a snooty rich-kid last name. It kind of is. Some of our other relatives have big, big houses with ivy on the walls. We're... doing allright," she mumbled, embarrassed.

"That doesn't sound so bad."

"It's not," she admitted. "It's just..." She wasn't sure why she was willing to open up like this. To a killer. An evil ghoul. But maybe that was exactly why. If he was gonna slice her up anyway, what would it matter? "We have a nice house. I like living there. We have a maid. No pets; they're too messy. Dad works a lot. Mom is like... She likes being a housewife more than anyone else in the world. She wants everything to be perfect. I've got a brother and a sister. They're three, and twins, and Mom shows them off to everyone. We get along I guess. It almost feels like-" She shut down the thought that was about to follow and backed away. That was too raw to admit, even if she was at death's door.

The fox leaned forward a little. "You're talking about a lot of stuff that's not you. What are you like? What do you enjoy?"

"I like running," she said without hesitation. "It feels like it's all I'm good at. I like my music, and I like watching TV on my laptop, and onion rings, even though Mom says they stink up the house. I have a lot of stuffed animals. And I like the color green. And yellow. They're best when they're together."

"I see you're wearing both today," he said approvingly.

She unclenched her legs and stretched out, so they could both see her sunny yellow top and emerald shorts. "Thank you. I'm kinda too cold right now, but then, I thought I was going to stay running the whole time I was out today. Kinda stupid."

"No, no. You couldn't have anticipated all this."

She narrowed her eyes. "I guess?" she said bitterly. "I'm not good at anything in school, so I can't be all that smart. I'm useless at math. I get bored trying to read. If I get Cs, I'm happy. And I've got this big dumb clown nose I wish I could get rid of." She rubbed her paw over it as if she could erase it. "And these big dumb teeth like a license plate sticking out. I look like a boy. I even dress like a boy. Maybe I am one. I'm sure not enough of a girl for Mom."

The fox looked rather startled. He didn't know how to respond to that.

Tracy crossed her arms and leaned forward onto them. The killer beside her no longer mattered. She'd been bottling this up for far too long. "She likes everything perfect. And I'm not. Things used to be better. Then, I don't know when it happened but, it was like I stopped being their daughter. I was just someone who lived there that they pretended to like. I didn't turn out right. I'm not a cute ballerina princess, or a super-smart science girl. I'm just... I run. That's about it. And when the twins came along," she sniffed in contempt, "that was it for me. I got demoted to babysitter. I live in the house but I don't feel like they want me there anymore, except when I can do things for them. When I can change diapers or smile for photos or go along with all the weird 'projects' Mom picks up and then dumps a week later."

Her muzzle was smashed down deep in her folded arms. Her next words were nearly inaudible. "I'm not good enough for her. I'm a project she's sick of and I won't go away."

After that there was silence for a while. Or at least no more words. The cars on the freeway still rumbled by. The autumn leaves still scratched and skittered as the wind swept them along across the concrete.

"Tracy..."

The young chipmunk looked up. For a second there, she'd actually forgotten she wasn't alone. She'd forgotten the mall and the bones and the Christmas tree. For an instant she was terrified again. Then she saw his eyes.

He looked like it was killing him to not pull her into a hug and console her.

"It sounds like you're a very unhappy girl," he said.

"I guess?" she admitted quietly. "I shouldn't be, though? Like, I'm way better off than a lot of other kids. I have food and a warm house. My parents don't hit me with belts or make me work in a coal mine. I'm fine. Really, everything's okay."

"Do you feel loved?" he asked.

Tracy knew she couldn't answer that question.

The fox nodded.

Tracy flinched a little when he suddenly stood up and took a few steps past her. She hadn't forgotten he was dangerous.

The fox's tailtip flicked back and forth rapidly. He stretched his legs, then rubbed the back of his neck. Without turning around, he addressed her. "Tracy, you did what I asked. That was much more than I expected. Thank you, sincerely, for showing trust in me. I know it's not fair of me to ask for any more, but if you would like to know more about me, it would be easier to show you."

Goosebumps prickled all along her arms and legs. "What do you mean?"

He turned, and on his face it showed that he knew exactly how bad this sounded. "Would you follow me back inside the mall?"

Her heart stopped. Her nerves froze. Her eyes went wide as baseballs. She stared at him.

As before, he did not move. He let her decide. He was positioned such that, if she wanted to take off right there and then, he would simply walk back to the mall without her and vanish.

Tracy felt as if there were jackhammers in her stomach. The mall. He wanted to take her back into that place with the pit full of ash and skeletons. Where the bodies were burned. Burned alive? She didn't know. But it was probably what would happen to her regardless. Just another skull for some other stupid kid to find years down the line. Absolutely not. She wanted to tell him no. Wanted to kick his legs out from under him and run like a rocket back home.

She was standing up.

Her cheeks flushed and her jaw trembled. How did she get here? Why wasn't she running away? Was she out of her mind?

"You can follow if you choose to," the fox said softly. He headed back across the parking lot towards the hole in the boards.

Tracy turned to watch him. 'No, Tracy, no. You're not going to follow him. Stop. Stop this. Don't be stupid. He's going to trick you and hurt you. He's going to KILL you. Stop!' She was crying again. 'Stop being a wimp and just GO.'

Tracy started walking after the fox in the security guard outfit.



*~*~*~*


The little chipmunk hustled across the parking lot. She watched the murderous stranger lift the loose board aside. She watched his blue pant leg and his orange tailtip disappear through. A moment later, she was standing in front of the hole too.

She stared at it. Like the hole of a guillotine. And she'd have to stick her head through just like one. Her blood was rushing, pounding, drumming in her ears. She was shaking all over. She felt like she couldn't get enough breath. She had never been more scared, and half of that was at herself. Why was she doing this? Why was her body disobeying her and following after this... this evil creepy killer guy? Even if he hadn't OUTRIGHT ADMITTED to being A MURDERER, there was still the basic fact that she was a skinny little chipmunk girl and he was a strong, grownup adult fox. Nothing about this equation ended well for her. Tracy watched her hand reaching for the board.

She made herself stop. She stood there shivering from head to toe, and the cold had nothing to do with it. She could barely see from the tears flooding down her cheeks. She knew, absolutely knew, that he was waiting there behind that hole. Waiting with an axe. The moment she put her head through, the blade would come down and sever her neck. Her dumb head would go rolling away in a shower of blood. SLICE!!! Just like that. Her life would be over.

She was trembling and crying and terrified, but she could not stop herself. Could not. She crouched down, and at least looked through the hole first to check. She didn't see anyone lurking there. Didn't see the axe glinting. "Hello?"

No response. Same as the first time.

Tracy took in a long, slow, deep breath, and squeezed herself through the opening, into the darkness.

A moment later she was standing up. Eyes closed, but neck still intact.

She opened her eyes. Since they hadn't shifted suddenly from sunlight to dark, she could see a lot clearer this time. Same thin entryway. Same gutted-out stockroom beyond.

"Hello? Mr. Security Guard?" She realized she didn't have anything else to call him.

She had not actually expected a response to her timid whisper. "I'm down here at the front of the store."

Tracy nodded and ran to meet him.

Past the oil drum, past the mannequin stands, past the art and the empty store. He was waiting by the torn-off gate just like he'd said. Standing straight, hands in his pockets. The sun was setting outside, so not as much light made it through the ceiling. Still, it was enough to silhouette him against the entrance.

"I'm glad to see you came," he said earnestly.

Slightly breathless, Tracy blurted, "I don't know why I followed you and I'm scared and this is dumb and just show me what you're gonna show me and get it over with PLEASE!"

He chuckled lightly. "Alright." He took his hand out of his pocket and held it up, showing it was empty. His face was in shadow, but she could still see his soft, handsome smile. "You've shown unimaginable trust in me, Tracy, and I hate to keep having to ask for more. But just this one last thing and you'll see. I have to touch you for it to work."

Her tail frizzed up. Suddenly she realized that maybe it wasn't death she should be afraid of. Maybe he was going to rape her. Hold her down and pull her clothes off. Her cheeks flushed hot.

He backed up a few steps. "Not in any kind of dirty way!" he reassured. "It can be any kind of touch. On your shoulder, or your paw. You choose."

She looked at his paw. Fuzzy dark fur like a teddy bear. But also precise, curved claws. "Why?"

He shrugged and shook his head. "I have to transfer a bit of the illusion away. So you can see what I see."

Not a word of that made sense. But Tracy was ashamed of herself to admit she didn't mind. Maybe it was just fine as an excuse to say yes to his paw touching her. Was she that starved for contact?

Shivering, she said, "Okay."

He nodded, and motioned for her to take a few steps forward with him. He held out his hand for her to hold.

She looked at it. The leather pads. The way the fur of his paw was slightly darker than where it transitioned at his wrist. She had touched him before and it felt nice. She'd hugged him. He'd patted her shoulder. But that was before she knew he was a murderer. Would it still feel as good?

Hesitantly, like she was about to grab a cactus leaf or barbed wire, she placed her small paw into his.

The warmth as he closed his fingers around hers sent shockwaves through her.

"There we go. That's all," he said, sounding happily relieved. "Now take a look."

Tracy unclenched her eyes and peeked at his hand.

"No, silly," he said with a gentle chuckle. "At the mall."

"Huh?" She turned her head and nearly fainted.

Her paws shot to her mouth to cover a gasp of astonishment. She was unprepared for this. Nothing in her entire life could have prepared her for this. She gaped in complete paralytic shock.

It was snowing.

Snowing indoors. Big fluffy flakes were dancing down from the ceiling, materializing from thin air. The whole lower level was covered in a thin blanket of fuzzy whiteness, and it wasn't cold at all. On the contrary. Tracy felt a rush of warmth hug itself around her like someone had just lit a fireplace nearby. The giant escalator was now decorated with yards and yards of tinsel and balloons. Drawings were taped to the sides all up and down. At the base was a small mountain of colorful plastic kayaks. The plant pots were upright again, filled with miniature palm trees, and beside them was a little cabana and a cooler and snacks. On the other side, the toy store was trumpeting color and light. The shelves were stocked to the rafters. Plushies, dolls, RC cars. As Tracy looked further up the aisle, she could see that every store was full now. And not just with merchandise. Some of them had been wildly repurposed. There was a ball pit. A ping-pong room. A television room with beanbags. A humongous hoard of sports equipment. And looking up, the second floor balcony was festooned with climbing nets and more decorations. Colors almost blinding. Tracy could hear arcade machines up there. She could smell fresh-baked pretzels.

And the TREE! Her breath caught in her throat when she finally focused on it. It looked twice as big now that it was fully decked out. Ribbons, lights, candy canes. Innumerable ornaments of every style. Some weren't even ornaments. She saw gold watches and necklaces, cell phone covers, game controllers and toys, candy and hats and mittens. Anything that would stick in the branches. Beneath this evergreen behemoth, the little train was chuffing along on its miniature tracks. There was a glossy plastic engine like an oversized wind-up, and two cars for kids to ride in. Once it passed, Tracy could see Santa's chair and a humongous pile of presents. Real presents, not just giftwrapped props.

It was impossible. Miraculous. Unbelievable. Tracy could not stop crying today, but now it was from sheer awe.

The fox stood behind her, just enjoying her reaction. His smile was wide and warm. He kept his arms crossed behind him, biding his time until she could find a voice again.

After several minutes of gasping and gawking, Tracy finally spun around and screamed, "HOW!?"

He winced at her volume, then giggled. "I can understand your excitement! I hope, even if this doesn't explain everything, at least it illustrates why you had to trust me for several of the steps. Could I have possibly told you about this without you calling me a lunatic and a liar?"

"I guess not!" She glanced back at Payne's and now it was a dance hall. The graffiti was still there, but the floor had been completely cleared off to make room for lovely hardwood. There was a massive sound system in the corner, with amps as big as refrigerators. Mannequins dressed in ridiculous fashions were positioned all along the perimeter like they were dancing with partners. Tracy even spotted a pile of rollerskates in the corner.

Suddenly it was too much. She had to sit down. And since there was no chair nearby, she fell backwards.

The fox guard swiveled in a flash and caught her. "Yikes! Are you allright?"

Tracy blushed scarlet. One of his arms braced her shoulders, but the other was kinda touching her butt. And she kinda liked it. And she was kinda super-turbo-embarrassed about that. "S-sorry! I just got overwhelmed!" She wiggled out of his arms (not actually wanting to) and braced herself against the glass of the display window. She could still see the lights of the Christmas tree in its reflection. That by itself was almost too much, but not looking directly at the impossibilities was helping. "Okay. Please. How? Tell me. I see it but it can't be there. None of it. It makes my brains go scrambled just looking at it."

He looked proud of his handiwork. "I work in illusions. Mostly. I can do some other things, but primarily I make people see or not see things. The loose board was an example. I felt you coming by to investigate, and I knew you weren't one of those rock-throwing types, so I let you see the gap. Normally it would look closed off."

"How!?" she growled. "This is magic stuff! This isn't supposed to happen!"

He cocked his head. "Maybe you've just never encountered it before. Maybe people like me keep it a secret."

Tracy wearily shook her head. "This is just making me have more questions."

"I understand," he said with sympathy.

In the reflection of the glass, she saw his hand extended. When she turned, he was asking with his eyes if she would follow him.

She was still afraid. She had not forgotten the bodies. But her fear was growing dimmer. This couldn't all be bad. No one who could speak so softly to her, and make such a beautiful tree, could be all bad. Tracy reached out and put her paw in his. She felt better the instant his fur touched hers.

He started walking and she followed. She stiffened a little when she realized he was leading her towards the restrooms. She was not entirely surprised. And then an awful thought occurred to her. "I think I get it. You show kids this wonderful amusement park circus show, and that's how you lure them in. You take them into the bathroom..." she looked down at her paw in his, "like you're doing with me... and that's where you kill them."

He glanced back and admitted, "That's... half correct."

Her goosebumps multiplied. Her fur stood up like she'd been hooked to a generator. But she didn't let go. Because she recognized this as real magic now. And maybe it was worth it to see real magic even for just an instant. Even if he made her kneel before an altar and cut her throat with a ritual knife. She was terrified, but also exhilarated. Because this was a fairy tale, and she was in it. And sometimes little kids got the bad ending in fairy tales. But wasn't it worth it just to be part of the story?

Tracy followed the fox past the mound of presents and Santa's peppermint-colored throne. Her sneakers left prints in the snow. As she passed beneath the tree she craned her neck to look up, all the way up, through the dizzying cone of branches. Pure amazement. Like a colony of fireflies were living inside. She squeezed the fox's hand in gratitude for letting her see this.

And past the tree, the illusion continued. More stores had been transformed. One was totally emptied out so trampolines could be nailed to every surface, ceiling included. One was a stuffed storeroom of clothes. One had a big pile of toilets and some nearby sledgehammers for smashin'. And the spa was back in business as well. Tracy saw shampooing chairs and an aqua-massage table and possibly a mudpit in the far back.

Then they were at the restrooms, and Tracy accepted that her time was short. Though when the fox turned towards the Gentleman's room, Tracy let go of him just long enough to check one extra thing out. She dashed to the Ladies' side and looked around the corner. "Wow!" The pink tile was gleaming so clean you could eat off it. The stalls all had doors again. There were bowls of potpourri, and candles, and even a miniature waterfall. Tracy honestly wished she could have had the chance to pee in here before dying.

But... No sense prolonging it. She skipped back to where the fox was holding out his hand to her again. This time she took it without hesitation, and smiled at him.

He stepped around the corner into the room. Tracy steeled herself, closed her eyes, and did as well.

She waited for the axe. Or the dagger. Or some other implement.

None came.

When she peeked one eye open, the fox was looking down at her, patiently waiting to explain.

She looked around the room. Unlike everything else, it had stayed exactly the same. The floor was sunken in and black with ash. There were no stalls or toilets. Only the pile of bones. It was not a towering mountain, but it was not small either. Tracy would not have been able to count the dead. This room was dark and entirely grey. It even seemed to suck the color out of her fur and clothes. She did not like being here. Yet she was not exactly afraid either. By now she was certain: there was some purpose here she didn't understand yet.

"Look at that far wall, Tracy," the fox pointed, "and tell me what you see."

Was that where the altar and the axe would be? Tracy obeyed and looked, and felt her stomach turn over. She was looking, but not seeing anything. It was just... black back there. Like smoky fog. Like someone had coated the whole wall in so many layers of black paint there wasn't even a wall anymore. Maybe it was a trick of the light? Maybe the room extended back further than it seemed, and it was too dark to make anything out?

Before she could reply, he said, "There's nothing wrong with your eyes. And it's not an optical illusion. At least, not one you'd have seen before. That... is me."

She stared at him, plainly baffled.

He gave her paw an affectionate squeeze. "You see, I'm an illusion too."

She looked down at the paw holding hers. It sure felt real. She reached up and brushed her fingers through his cheekfur. That felt real too.

He smiled as if she'd just given him an invaluable gift. "I know. But I'm very good at my tricks. And right now, I'm not standing here, holding your pretty paw. I'm back there, in that darkness, covered up. Because you're not ready to see me yet. Not today. But maybe later, if you choose."

"Are you an alien?" she asked, figuring that was as good a guess as any.

"I'm an angel," he replied bashfully.

She furrowed her eyebrows. "An angel? Like with wings?"

"Seems unlikely, doesn't it? But it's what I am. Or was. Angels aren't meant to be on Earth. It seems to have an... effect on us." He laughed dryly. "I say 'us', but it's just me honestly. I'm in hiding. I'm kind of a coward."

Tracy looked back to the inky shadow in the back of the deathroom. She kneaded her fingers across his. "I don't mind if you're an illusion. You're handsome."

A genuine smile. "Why thank you. But my real self is, ah, less handsome."

She looked sad at that. "It can't be that bad."

He shook his head. "It is. This is not something you have to try to make me feel better about. I've been here a few millennia. I accept what I am. So trust me once more: I can see in your eyes that you think you can handle it. But you've had enough shocks for one day. No arguments. We'll save it for another time. If you want to."

She thought maybe she was ready, but didn't want to argue. "Allright." She looked down at the dusty grey bones. "So... you kill kids like me to take their energy, right? Or their souls? To keep you alive here?"

He looked genuinely impressed. "That is startlingly close."

She nodded. "I do watch sci-fi shows sometimes. If you say it's hard on angels to be here, then maybe you're like a vampire who has to drink blood to stay alive? But with souls. I guessed that part because it just seemed more likely than blood."

He noticed she was still holding his hand. "The idea doesn't scare you?"

Tracy looked at one of the skulls, and thought, 'that might be me soon.' "Not really," she said, trying to sound nonchalant. "You've been really nice to me, and I think you're a good furson, angel or not, so if you have to feed on me to stay alive... I can be okay with that."

He placed his other hand on top of hers. "That is incredibly generous of you. But, happy surprise, not really necessary."

She perked up, then visibly shivered in relief. "It isn't?"

A smirk. "I did ask if you wanted to die today, and you said 'of course not'."

"Oh," she remembered. She was surprised to find herself feeling... weirdly disappointed. It would have been tremendously exciting and romantic to be slurped up to sate a real angel's hunger. (A part of her protested that she had no proof he WAS a real angel. But she countered that anything that could make such cool illusions was close enough to suit her.)

He laughed, recognizing exactly her emotion. She'd well and truly proven to him by now that she was a wonderful choice. A miracle that she'd come here by herself, by accident. (And he had firsthand knowledge that miracles didn't happen anymore.) "If you really, really wanted to donate yourself to me this instant, I'd be grateful. It's just, I already have plenty of sustenance right now. More than enough. You see," he gestured towards the bones, "it wasn't the end for these young furs when they died."

Tracy inhaled sharply, her eyes widening.

Guiding her paw, he led her away from the deathroom and back towards the mall. "Tracy, I would like you to meet my family."

She was glad to emerge from the grey, sooty room. But even though she was doubly glad to see the tree again, she looked and she didn't see anything else. Just her shoeprints in the snow. No little ghost kids flying about. Though holy heck, that idea was cute! Was that what was going to happen to her? A little wispy transparent chipmunk who could fly? Or maybe she'd look like a bedsheet with eyeholes.

The fox's smirk filled his muzzle. "Come on, don't be impolite. Introduce yourself."

She gave him a puzzled look. There was nobody here to be introduced to. But, on the other hand, trusting him had worked out well so far. Scanning across the mall's colorful concourse, she awkwardly addressed whoever was listening. "Hi there! Um. I'm Tracy. If there's any ghosts, I'm sorry if I was too loud when I was exploring earlier. I thought this place was empty."

"Very polite," he commended. "Now give them a handshake."

She almost asked 'Who?' but from the way he was giggling she was pretty sure by now he was pranking her. She rolled her eyes. "Okay. Hello, Mr. Ghost." She held out her arm and pumped it up and down.

Then she almost screamed when her bracelet shook up and down all by itself.

Tracy yelped in surprise as something gave her a shove from behind. But she was caught and held before she could fall over. Something else tugged her leg, then her shoe. She cried out in panic. She was being pulled and turned to and fro, beyond her control. It was her clothes! They were going crazy! Her shirt and shorts were tugging her around in a circle, and her shoes were abetting them!

The fox tipped back his head in a cheerful chortle. With a glance towards the ceiling speakers, a Christmastime waltz began playing.

Tracy jolted at the sudden brassy introduction bellowed down from above her. But as the melody emerged and began to sway, her clothes started to keep time with it. Her bracelet held her arm out, while her shirt pulled her body forwards. Her shorts moved her legs and her shoes moved her feet. She gasped in delighted realization. She and her outfit were dance partners!

The music enfolded her in a brilliant whirlwind of sound; the notes drifting down to her ears like the mall's falling flakes. The harps, strings and woodwinds echoed all around her. Grand, soaring music to fill the heart with lightness. Her bracelet led the way like a gentleman's gloved hand. Her sneakers skimmed across the floor weightlessly, kicking up sparkling sprays of snow. Her mouth was wide open in speechless joy.

Tracy twirled and twirled. The lights and decorations blurred around her, making her just a bit dizzy. So she closed her eyes and let herself sway. Whatever was causing this, she allowed them her complete trust. She felt her clothes guide her all around the Christmas tree. She could hear the little train chug and rattle past. She felt warm snowflakes land on her face and melt instantly. The music pervaded her body until it seemed as if the rhythm alone was all that was holding her up.

Tracy didn't want it to end, but she felt the crescendo coming. Her bracelet lifted her arm high. Her shorts twirled her in a circle, then her shirt dipped her back so far her hair nearly touched the floor. The strings reached their strongest note, and with a jolly barroom of brass, the music reached a jubilant end.

Tracy was breathless, yet hadn't moved a muscle on her own. She applauded until her paws were sore. "I don't know what just happened or who did that, but thank you! That was so much fun!!"

The fox approached the giggling chipmunk and put a steadying paw on her shoulder. It looked like she might tip over from giddiness. "You can't see them right now, but this is my family. Part of them at least. I have to say, they surprised me. They've been practicing with the mannequins, I see."

Tracy redoubled her efforts to spot the ghosts, squinting at thin air. "How many of them are there?"

"Eight, right now," he said. "It changes from time to time."

"Well thank you! All of you!" Tracy shouted. She heard herself echo, but if there was any response from the dancing phantoms, she couldn't tell.

"How about," the fox suggested, "if you'd like to meet them face-to-face, you can come back tomorrow."

Tracy spun around to him, disappointed. "Why not now? That'd be awesome to spend the whole night having a haunted sleepover!"

He chuckled at her enthusiasm. "I'm glad you think so. But look at the time. Don't you have a family to get home to?"

When he held out his watch, Tracy grabbed his arm to pull it closer. The little digital numbers made her blood run cold. "Oh NO! You're right, I gotta get back! They'll be home by now! And it'll take me an hour to get there anyway!" She looked up at the skylight. Within the angel's illusion the mall's own lights were glowing, but beyond them she could see black night sky. Tracy thought about what her parents might do, and started to jitter in panic.

The fox took her paws in his. "Calm down. You lost track of time, but it's okay. You've got an hour to think of an excuse, right?"

She forced herself to take a deep breath. "That's right. Yeah." She looked towards Payne's. There was a hole in the spell now, letting her see past it to the dusty, empty showroom. She looked back to the angel and pulled their paws up to her cheeks. "I don't want to leave though."

His smile was warm as pancakes and syrup. "I'm so glad to hear you say so. But we'll have plenty of time tomorrow. Time is something I always have more of."

"Okay," she said, not quite understanding. She rustled her cheekfur against his soft paws for a moment, gazing up into his eyes. Then she remembered the time and made herself let go. She stepped back. She gave him a nod. "Thank you for everything you showed me today. I will come back tomorrow, I promise."

"I'll be here," he said simply.

Tracy took one last long look at the beautiful mirage. She wanted to etch this moment into her memory, just in case she'd find nothing but a ruined old ordinary building upon her return. She wanted to always remember this moment, even when she was an old grandma chipmunk in a rocking chair. When she had filled herself with as many details as she could hold, she looked down to her shirt pocket where her headphones dangled out. There was a special playlist she had, called TNT, that was only for use in emergencies. When she needed to burn as much speed as possible. Now was a perfect time for it.

She popped the buds in her ears and trotted towards the exit. It was surreal to pass through the edge of the illusion. She stepped back and forth a few times, from brightly lit funland to dreary abandoned displays. Up ahead she could see the door to the stockroom, and even a tiny glint that might have been the hole through the boards.

Suddenly she scooted to a stop and turned around. From here the mall was back to being a dark, dirty wreck. But the fox in the guard's uniform was still standing there, watching her go.

"You never told me your name!" she cried out.

He realized she was right, and rather than shouting it across the distance, he ran over to her. "You're right, I didn't. Let me fix that."

When he leaned in to whisper in her ear, his warm breath gave her shivers. The word he spoke was not a name she'd ever heard before, but it was befitting of an angel. It sounded like a breeze from across the ocean.

"Nylsearis."

The name seemed to dissolve as soon as it touched her mind, as if mortals were not worthy to receive it. "Can you spell that? Or write it down?"

A melancholy chuckle. "Not really. Most of my cubs just call me Nyl."

She nodded. "Okay. I can remember that."

He glanced towards the exit. "Sure you'll be safe? It's dark out there."

She smiled at his concern. "I have excellent night vision. Lotsa practice."

He was not surprised. Here was a girl who was better than she realized at taking care of herself. "Go on home, Tracy."

She hesitated as long as she could. Wanting to be here instead of out in that winter evening cold, or her even chillier home. But he was right. They'd have more time tomorrow.

Tracy tore herself away and dashed for the stockroom. She put her music on, and let the screaming of electric guitars propel her faster into the night.

There was no light in the parking lot but the moon. Her pupils dilated. She felt fear, and the wind trying to steal her warmth, and knew that the only thing that would keep her safe now was her speed. So she ran.



*~*~*~*



Tracy arrived home feeling like a furnace on the inside and a glacier on the outside. Her nose and throat were in frigid agony, and her muscles equally so from hard use. From home to mall had taken her an hour this afternoon, but she thought she'd scraped at least fifteen minutes off that time coming back (even when she paused in the field to take a truly epic pee). As much as she dreaded the "oh we were so worried" lecture she was about to face, it would be worth it to just sit down. She could feel every pulse of her heartbeat in her calves, as if they were water balloons on the verge of bursting.

She pulled out her key and tried to unlock the side door as silently as possible. She heard the TV on loud. Maybe she could sneak upstairs unnoticed.

But when she eased the door to the kitchen open, she nearly peed her pants when the knob bumped into her father's backside.

"WHAT!?" he spun around. "Oh! Tracy! Good lord, you almost gave me a heart attack!" Tracy's family was mixed; her father was a prairie dog. The kids had all turned out chipmunks (though the twins' fur was a bit sandy). Dad was portly and dressed as usual in his work suit. "Shut the door, you're letting the cold air in."

"Oh, sorry!" She locked up and scampered into the kitchen.

Dad looked like he wanted to get back to the TV. He had a freshly-opened can in his hand. "So... you were out for one of your runs, huh?"

"Yeah. Just around the neighborhood a few times. Like usual."

He awkwardly nodded. "Allright. Exercise is good. So, eh, I picked up some Thai food. Over there: help yourself. I gotta get back to the living room. My back's killin' me."

"Okay," Tracy said in a weak mumble. She was stunned. Not a word of disapproval! He didn't even care she'd been gone. And when he left, he absent-mindedly turned the kitchen light off, draping her in darkness.

Not knowing what to feel, Tracy wandered over to the counter where there were several greasy paper sacks and open trapezoidal containers. She got a fork from the drawer and looked over what was left. Everything seemed picked over. She rooted around and all she came up with was a box of white rice.

She didn't actually feel sad, or angry. Too tired, she supposed. She knew she couldn't eat just rice for dinner. But a good idea popped up and she went to the pantry to see if she could find a can of soup to dump on top of it. There were plenty. She chose chicken stew and debated heating it up, but couldn't stand waiting even three minutes to sit down. It'd be fine cold.

Tracy put her makeshift dinner and a cup of milk on a tray and headed across the livingroom to the stairs. Thankfully there was an alley behind the couch and her family. Their whale-sized TV was on and blaring, captivating the twins.

Just as she was at the stairwell, her mother's voice stopped her in her tracks. "Oh there you are! Where were you? Out running again? We ordered dinner without you, I hope that's allright."

Tracy turned around, flinching a little. Her feet were throbbing. She really wanted to get upstairs and lay down. "Yeah, it's fine."

Mom was looking regal as always with her huge cloud-like hairdo, full makeup, and poofy white bedroom robe. She didn't get out of her chair, just shouted over the show, "You shouldn't run so much! Not in this weather at least. And what are you eating? Is that dog food?"

"It's just soup, Mom."

"Well if you didn't want Thai we could have ordered something else. IF you'd been here. But if you're fine with what you have there, I suppose..."

Tracy leaned on the banister and put her foot on the first step, trying to let her body language say what she was too timid to speak. "It's fine, Mom."

To her dismay, the voluptuous chipmunkess popped up from her recliner and shuffled across the carpet towards her. One of the twins got a static shock and howled. The other guffawed.

Mom paused in front of Tracy, kneading her hands together and looking upon her daughter like a room that needs redecorating. "Honey, honestly, you shouldn't go out like that. A nice skirt would keep those skinny legs warmer, don't you think so?"

Tracy's cheeks flushed. She began leaning heavily towards the stairs. "Mommm..."

"I'm just looking out for your well-being! You could do so much more with yourself!" Her eyes sparkled. "I know! This weekend I was going to spend the afternoon getting some touch-ups at the salon. You could come with me! A full makeover! Put some color in those cheeks!"

Tracy tried very hard to conceal that she'd rather be barbecued. "We'll see, Mom. I think Mr. Cherroot wants this big project thing done over the weekend."

Visible annoyed disappointment. Mom pouted and bunched handfuls of Tracy's cheekfur up in her hands, mooshing them like dough. She sighed. "Why don't you ever seem to want to improve yourself, Tracy? A girl your age should have started wearing makeup years ago. Don't all your classmates?"

"I guess," Tracy slurred through her mangled cheeks. "Mom, I'm tired and my food's gonna get cold ...er."

For just an instant, the glare that Mom gave her said, 'Go on then, and don't ever come back down.' Then her lipstick smile returned. "Allright then. Don't let me keep you. You don't want to eat dinner with your family? Want to lock yourself up in your room like a pouty teenager? That's perfectly allright." She glanced down and wrinkled her nose. "And what is that thing bulging out your pocket!?"

Tracy thought up a lie so quick she was proud of herself. "It's just an apple. For dessert."

"Well. At least you're making an effort to eat healthy." She turned to head back to her chair, and Tracy did not waste any time rocketing up the steps and out of sight.



*~*~*~*



Tracy shut her bedroom door. For a few moments, she just stared into space, feeling mortified and wishing she could sink into the carpet like quicksand. She locked the door behind her.

She set her tray on her desk, not really hungry anymore. She was about to take off running, divebomb her mattress and just fall right asleep in her clothes, but something in her pocket made her nix that. She was so glad Mom hadn't asked any further about it.

It was pure luck that she'd seen it. She had glanced to the side when she'd left the mall. Something had glimmered, and she had taken a gamble that it was worth a detour to investigate. The bench and the bus stop sign were gone. Nothing but cold, flat cement. She wondered how he'd done it, and what the heck she'd been sitting on. Had she just been hovering in midair? She supposed it was possible, given her clothes-dancing routine.

Then she saw it. She bent over and picked it up in the moonlight. This was not an illusion.

And now she pulled it out of her back pocket to place it gently on her bedside table. She sat down on the covers to admire it.

Her ornament. Her shiny golden ball.

She picked it up and turned it in her paws. She could see her own reflection, but not a single crack or chip.

She didn't know how.

But maybe she could ask him tomorrow.

Deciding she actually was hungry after all, Tracy brought her soup over to the bed and carefully bundled herself up in the covers. Cold chicken stew over rice was not bad. In between spoonfuls, she kept glancing at her ornament. It was nice to have a tangible souvenir. Otherwise, this was the part in any story where the main girl would start trying to convince herself she'd spent the whole afternoon in a hallucination. Some things were too good to be true. But maybe once in a while they were.

She finished her meal and licked the bowl clean. She was about to turn off the light and get an early start on sleep, but then she remembered her homework. She glanced contemptuously at her books. A huge part of her wanted to say 'to heck with it' and go to sleep anyway. But she compromised. She whipped through all four assignments on pure guesswork, figuring she might be able to pull off a C if she was lucky. Then she turned the light out and collapsed.

She wiggled herself deep into the blankets, wrapping her arms and legs around her plushie pile. Her feet were still throbbing, but overall she felt just... lovely.



*~*~*~*





PART TWO

*~*~*~*

School the next day was excruciating. No, wait, that doesn't cover it. More like ex...cru...ci....a...TING.

It was like trying to fall asleep the night before your birthday. The teachers all talked in slo-mo and nothing could divert her attention long enough to make time pass. The clock was a granite sculpture. Tracy scarfed her lunch without tasting it and did nothing through recess but wander and fidget. When the bell finally rung at 3:00, she was gone. Not even Mrs. Tabenaux's threat of detention could stop her paws.

Her music pounded her skull, layered over a soundtrack of tweeting birds and passing cars. Her sneakers bounced off the cement like a moonwalk. She was headed east.

One of her favorite things about running was something Tracy called The Glide. That was the magic moment when she'd been running long and steady enough to slip into perfect flow. Where it felt as if she was putting no effort at all into her strides. The beat of the song was propelling her along, and her will was simply letting it happen.

Tracy had The Glide almost the entire way to the mall.

'Hello parking lot!!' she shouted in her mind as she passed the last of the trees. This time she let caution fly and streaked straight across, trip-causing cracks bedamned. And she didn't stumble once. She wasn't running, she was floating. The sheer power of her grin was carrying her.

The only thing that could have put an end to her joy was seeing the hole boarded up. It was. Tracy scooted to a stop and gawked at the repaired doorway. No way. Absolutely not. She'd go home and get a claw hammer and pry it up herself if she had-

It winked at her.

Tracy stumbled back a few steps. The board had raised and lowered in a fluid motion, exactly like a winking eye. And just like that, the hole was plainly visible again.

It took a moment to dawn on her that she'd been pranked.

Bursting into laughter, she dove through the hole. "You jerk!"



*~*~*~*


She shouted his name as she ran through the deserted clothing store. To her overwhelming delight, the illusion began to shimmer into view ahead of her like a developing photograph. The tree's lights began to glow. Shops began to fill. Snow began to swirl.

And by the time she made it through Payne's main entrance, the stuff was up to her ankles. It was a blizzard today! Yet as warm and soft as an avalanche of kitten fur. Tracy laughed in happiness. She stuck out her tongue to catch some flakes and was pleasantly surprised to find they had a hint of vanilla.

"Nyl! I'm back! I ran here as fast as I could! Well, almost as fast as last night, but I didn't wanna break my ankles off!" She looked all around the snowy mall but didn't see a blue uniform. "Where are you!?"

At her asking, footprints appeared in the snow. The dots connected in the direction of the bathrooms.

That was not her first choice of places to go, but it was not surprising either. Tracy readied herself for the grey and the black.

First though, she took a leak and freshened up in the fabulous pink ladies room. Definitely the nicest one she'd ever peed in. And it gave her a moment to ease off the throttle. She was still pumped-up from her sprint. The deathroom was a solemn place not fit for such a mood.

When she was ready, she entered. It was dim and colorless as before, but the fear had been replaced almost entirely by curiosity. Tracy felt like she'd barely seen anything yesterday compared to what more there might be today. "Nyl?"

A calm voice reached through the darkness towards her. "Tracy. I can't even express how happy I am that you came back."

She beamed. "Me too. And thank you for fixing my ornament."

A chuckle. "Like I said, I only mostly work in illusions. I can do a few real things too."

Tracy stared into the obscuring darkness at the back of the room. She felt like she hadn't been fully invited in yet.

"Do you think you're ready to see me as I truly am?" he asked.

Her answer was without hesitation. "Yes! No matter what it is, I'll accept you!"

A rueful sigh. "Don't be so certain." The blackness began to shift and churn. "But if you are, then you may come closer."

Tracy steeled herself and stepped forward right away. The angel had already shown her his heart. Nothing else mattered. Not even if he was covered in spots and sores and horns, or if he was a big ugly bug with pincers. Tracy walked boldly into the black fog and found she actually had to swat it away like cobwebs. Bit by bit she waved it off. She wondered if he was so ashamed he couldn't let his protection down as easily as his illusions.

She began to see something through the mist. At first she thought it was a spiderweb.

She gasped when she finally broke through into the back of the room. It was still too dim for details, but she had a clear enough sense of the overall shape.

This part of the bathroom, if the two were mirrored in construction, would have corresponded to where the sinks were on the ladies' side. Here it was a gouged-out hollow. Like someone had scraped away reality itself. There was a fungus growing across the back wall. A plum-red mass of branching tentacles.

No, Tracy knew exactly what they looked like. Nerves. In the fourth grade, her class had studied anatomy. Tracy had done a project on the nervous system. That was what they looked like. An unfathomably complex network of nerves, spreading across the walls, floor and ceiling, like the ivy on her uncle's house. Like blue veins on the legs of old women. As Tracy crept closer, she could see they were throbbing. All of them, from the thickest stalks all the way to the thinnest offshoots. They were undulating in time to a heartbeat. And there in the dead center was a central mass that looked almost like a winged man. Like gravity had slammed him to the wall and entombed him there in his own flesh.

The voice that emanated from nowhere in particular was as calm as ever, but tainted with unmistakable sorrow. "This is what happens to an angel when they flee Heaven. I don't know if it's the atmosphere, or to be apart from the presence of God. But I disobeyed him, and fled his wrath, and this is where I hide from his sight. Potentially forever."

Tracy walked with careful steps towards the pulsating center. Her face was stricken. She looked down at the ground, planning her movements to make sure she would not step on any of his red branches.

When she was close enough, she reached out a shaking hand. Gingerly, she brushed a finger across the surface. She recoiled. It was bumpy, like rough vinyl. It felt exactly like her scab last summer when she'd tumbled down the incline by the freeway overpass and damn near tore her knee off. The wound had crusted into a huge leathery caterpillar. She still had the scar.

He could see the horror on her face. "This is why I said last night that you weren't ready."

But when he looked closer, her expression was not horror. There were tears of sympathy in her eyes.

"Does it hurt?" was all she asked.

Her compassion warmed him. He didn't know if television and video games were desensitizing children to gruesome imagery year by year, but each time he'd let a new cub past his veil, it was a little easier for them. "It used to," he said. "For a while I looked like you might expect an angel to look. My wings were beautiful. After a few years, the itching started. By now it's stopped, thankfully. I feel about as much as you'd expect through the scars. It's not too bad."

"Especially when I make myself a new body to walk around in."

The second voice had come from behind her. She turned to see a familiar fox, this time in a button-down white shirt and blue jeans. Tracy gasped in happiness and ran across the room to hug him. It was wonderful to feel her cheek against his shirt, and his arms wrapping gently around her shoulders.

Mid-squeeze, she squeaked in embarrassment. She looked back over her shoulder. "I just trampled right over some of you! I'm sorry!"

His laugh jiggled her in his arms. "Don't worry! I don't feel much, and you don't weigh much."

"Oh. Okay. I'm glad I didn't hurt you."

"You couldn't. Not even with cleats." She winced a bit and he chuckled. "I... You don't know how much it means to me that you're taking this so well."

She looked as if she couldn't fathom why she wouldn't. "I told you, I watch sci-fi stuff. I've seen weirder things in movies."

"It was more difficult before movies," he said.

Tracy considered that. Nyl had said he'd been on Earth for a very long time. What if she'd been born in the past where she'd never seen anything like this before? Where no one had ever even dreamt of it? Looking back over her shoulder at the fractal web of flesh, it was admittedly unpleasant. And if this had been the first thing she'd stumbled onto yesterday, then yeah, she probably would have screamed bloody murder and pooped her pants. But now she could look at all those pulsing scabby avenues and feel nothing but sympathy. It looked painful to be this, no matter what he said.

"Let's do something a little nicer," he suggested, leaning down and nuzzling her ear.

She wiggled at the tickle. "Allright. Don't worry about me though."

Nyl took her hand and led her out of the room. Tracy took care again not to step on any of him, even if he'd said she couldn't hurt him. It was simply polite.



*~*~*~*


Tracy had only seen a fraction of the mall's illusion. The angel Nylsearis led her up the escalator towards the central hub, and she made herself dizzy from swiveling back and forth to see all the sights.

Most of the stores were fully restocked with shining new merchandise. Tracy saw cell phones and video games, jewelry and shoes. There was a juice bar and a burger joint with enticing smells wafting towards her nose. But some of the spaces had been gutted and refurbished into bedrooms. Possibly these were stores that had sold nothing of interest to cubghosts. On one such room, the glass walls were entirely postered over for privacy, and a bead curtain replaced the metal gate. Another was transparent, letting Tracy see a huge bed, stockpiles of stuffed toys, towers of books and even a minifridge. Over these rooms, Tracy saw that letters had been pried off  of other store's signs and rearranged to match the current occupants. She saw BONNIE and KEVIN and ELEANOR.

It occurred to her to wonder if, maybe someday, she'd be making a sign to put above her own mall bedroom.

Oh that was almost too wonderful to hope for! Tracy tried to clamp down the thrill that ran up her spine at that thought. She shouldn't presume. Nyl might just be introducing her for a visit. The other kids might not want her to stay. That thought felt depressingly likely. Tracy's tail drooped. After all, it wasn't like she had many friends at school either.

Thankfully, this dip in her mood did not last long. When they reached the central point of the mall's four main paths, the fountain blotted everything else out of Tracy's mind. In the mall's heyday it had been a futuristic deco structure, with water jets shooting up towards the main cupola skylight. That part had been restored, but also improved. It started with a wide marble perimeter, just the right height for weary shoppers to use as a bench. Inside was a moat where coins were flipped to make wishes. In the middle was a faux-rock outcropping from which a crystal spire emerged. But onto that structure had been grafted a gigantic tree-like climbing tower, made out of whatever materials little paws could scavenge. Tracy saw bedframes and ladders and crib sides and ceiling supports. She craned her neck until she almost toppled backwards. The junk-palace stretched up so tall, an accomplished climber could have stretched to touch the ceiling. Though the idea was petrifying, Tracy knew she would not be able to resist trying at some point.

Nyl took a seat on the marble ring. Beside him was a smaller out-jutting pond that he and the cubs had jury-rigged into a jacuzzi. A simple matter of turning the jets and the temperature way up. Once Tracy managed to pull her eyes away, she could see it bubbling.

"Are you comfortable with getting undressed?" Nyl asked.

Tracy turned scarlet. She had NOT expected that question! "Um, why!?"

He looked playfully amused at her embarrassment. "If you would like to meet the cubs you danced with last night, that will require me to lift your spirit out of your body. Only for a short while. But your body will sleep until I return your soul, and one of the safest places for it is our little hot tub here."

Tracy came close and leaned over the edge. "I won't drown?"

"No, no," he reassured. "You'd be sitting up. I used to leave 'visitors' lying on a bed, but that had problems. Has your foot ever fallen asleep?" Tracy nodded. "Without your soul, your body would be completely immobile. Even in dreams you shift a little. The blood does not circulate well. You'd wake up feeling... 'completely crappy' was how one of my cubs described it."

She grimaced. "Okay, so then the hot water keeps my blood moving around right?"

"Exactly."

She squinted. "It's not just an excuse to see me in my fur?"

She'd said it jokingly, but he immediately curled his tail around his lap and folded his arms over it. "Well... I don't want you to feel unease, but we tend to be relaxed here. We've all seen each other's fur. It's not out of the ordinary."

Tracy's whole face flushed warm. The idea was definitely taboo, and she could feel the little angel on her shoulder telling her 'absolutely not!'. Except, here was a real angel, and he was saying it was okay.

And it had been fun going along with everything else he'd suggested so far, hadn't it?

Tracy reached up to put her paws on her shoulders. "Um, could you, uh, at least turn around first?"

"Perfectly understandable. I'll even do one better." And he vanished.

Tracy yelped. He'd blinked out of existence like a light shutting off. "I'd be happier if you didn't! Now it feels like you're invisible and peeking at me from everywhere!"

An omnipresent chuckle. "My apologies!" Nyl reappeared, and this time walked around the side of the fountain and put his paws over his eyes. "Better?"

"Better." Blushing hot as lava, Tracy lifted the bottom of her shirt (robin's egg blue today) and pulled it up over her head. She dropped it on the floor and felt the air on her tummyfur. It suddenly occurred to her that, even if Nyl couldn't see her, there were a bunch of invisible cub ghosts probably hanging around right that very moment. "Everyone else turn around too!" she shouted, crossing her arms over her chest.

This was absolutely mortifying, but some part of Tracy was also enjoying it. It was incredibly naughty. She was right in the center of the mall, totally exposed, with seemingly miles of empty space all around. She pulled down her shorts and tried to imagine doing this in a normal mall with shoppers walking by all around her. A tingle shivered up through her whole body. She stepped out of her shorts and was now standing out in the open in nothing but panties and footwear. She was trembling all over! So embarrassing, yet also thrilling! Tracy sat down to get her shoes and socks off, and 'EEP!'ed at the cold marble. Even through her panties it was like sitting in a refrigerator. More carefully this time, she lowered herself down. Her teeth chattered a bit, but she got her laces undone and her socks pulled off, and tossed them over in the snow with her other clothes.

She wrapped her arms around herself and tried to be tiny. She could not believe she was sitting here in just her underpants! And she was definitely not gonna take those off with the possibility of anyone peeping. She rolled sideways into the water, shrieking a bit at the change in temperature, and soon tossed the small pink garment over the side.

Now Tracy was huddled in the bubbly water, still shivering, but also feeling like a boiled potato. (It was the opposite of finishing her run last night, she realized.)

"All finished?" Nyl called out.

"Y-y-yes."

The fox walked around into her view. Tracy squished herself down even deeper into the concealing water, suddenly acutely aware of how handsome he was. She'd never thought much about Pred guys before (figuring her parents would never let her hear the end of it if she dated outside her genus), and she'd definitely never thought about adult Preds. But Nyl, or at least his projected form, was tall and well-groomed, with a lustrous tail and those eyes that could make her melt.

It fully struck her then that she was trusting him to take her very soul out of her body. The ignominy of nudity had pushed that fact out of her mind. But not only did she believe he could do such a thing, she had accepted it without hesitation. Without even thought. 'Well, why shouldn't I trust him? I want to meet the ghost kids. And he's been entirely nice to me so far.'

That rhetorical question resonated with her. Why shouldn't she trust him? He'd shown he was worthy of it. And the danger alarms weren't coming from within herself: it was the voices of her parents, and her teachers, and the PSAs on TV that said everyone you didn't know was to be feared and avoided. Her own senses told her that she liked when Nyl would give her a hug or hold her hand. Tracy decided she'd rather listen to herself for once than everyone else.

Tracy closed her eyes and let herself relax. The water felt blissful now that her body had acclimated to it. The heat reached into her muscles and massaged them from inside. The young rodent eased her posture into a comfortable sitting position, propped up by the marble wall at her back. "I'm ready, Nyl. What now?"

She heard the splash of his shoes stepping into the water in front of her. "Nothing difficult, I assure you. I'm just going to put my hands on your shoulders, then I'll pull. It'll feel strange. Your reflex will be to fight it. Of course, your instincts will want to keep your soul inside your body. But I’ll take it nice and slow. There'll be a tugging, then you'll pop loose, and then you'll be a pretty little poltergeist."

She giggled bashfully at that. "It's, um, reversible, right? I'm sure you'd have said so if it wasn't. I just kinda wanna hear it."

"Perfectly understandable." He stepped closer and she felt his palms cup her bare shoulders. "And 100% reversible. I've done this so many times I've lost count. Never a misstep."

She exhaled and let herself go totally limp. Her feet were near a water jet and the bubbles felt like tiny tongues lapping at her soles. "I'm ready."

Just as he had described, there was an unearthly pull: a sensation she had only ever encountered in dreams before. Tracy let go of her doubts and leapt into the feeling. It was over in an instant. Far easier than she'd expected, just like slipping off a thick winter coat. And then she was standing up.

A booming cheer shocked her eyes open.

Suddenly she was surrounded by a mini-mob of other children! Tracy squeaked and reached down to cover herself up, but was mind-boggled to realized she somehow had her clothes on. Her yellow and green outfit from yesterday, actually. And she was standing IN her nude, semi-submerged body! Her feet were phasing right through her legs!

Seeing that the little chipmunk was inarticulate from confusion, Nyl scooped her into his arms and lifted her out of the fountain. Immediately she was swarmed by a cluster of cubs, all eager to say hello first.

Tracy's world spun around. She blinked and a dozen bright eyes were focused on her. Eight sunny smiles under eight twitching noses.

"Hi!" "Welcome!" "You came back!" "Hello!" "Hi!" "Glad to meet you!"

Tracy was buffeted by an avalanche of positivity. She'd never had a welcome so warm. "Um, hi! My head's kinda swimmy. One at a time, if that's okay?"

One eager mousie bustled everyone else out of her way to be first. "Hi!" she blared. Tracy was ensnared in a rib-cracking hug. "I'm Cassie! You were here last night! We were the ones that made your clothes dance! Wasn't that fun? You looked like you really enjoyed it! It was my idea!"

Words came out of this girl like bullets from a machine gun. When Tracy was released from the hug, she saw that Cassie was a white mouse, a bit shorter than her, with manic joy in her eyes and very unusual fur. It was as fluffy as an angora rabbit's (her cheeks were enormous), and she had chocolate-colored tiger stripes drawn all over her from head to toe.

Plus, her fur was almost all she was wearing.

"Oh!" Tracy fidgeted. "How come I've got clothes and you don't?"

Cassie's long whiskers bounced as she grinned. "Don't you usually have 'em on in your dreams? Same thing here. That's how you see yourself!" She stepped back and spread her arms. "On the other paw, why would I cover up my stripes? Aren't they great?"

Tracy was feeling all sorts of enjoyably confusing feelings at standing next to another girl who was stark naked except for her hot pink sandals. "They do look awesome on you."

"THANKS!" Cassie boomed, and squeezed Tracy again.

"I think she's overwhelmed, Cass. Give her some air." A hooved paw pried the mouse off the chipmunk like a crowbar, then held itself out for a shake. "I'm Tybalt. Pleased to meet you."

The young whitetail buck was a much calmer presence than Cassie. Also taller! Tracy was a bit awestruck by his antlers. Tybalt looked a year or so older than everyone else, and had that 'in charge' vibe that older brothers or hall monitors usually did. Tracy shook his hand and nibbled her bottom lip. "Pleased too. Um. Also. To meet you, I mean."

He chuckled at her shyness. He had a really nice smile. "I'm kind of second-in-command when Nyl's not around," he said, and the angel gave him a confirming pat on the shoulder. Tybalt was also dressed in mostly blue like the angel. "But I'm not, like, a jerk about it. All bossy all the time. Just when we need stuff decided, that's all."

Tracy nodded in agreement that such a furson was a necessary function of a group.

"Um, I guess I'll hand it off then. Who else wants to-?"

Three other cubs lunged to make the next introduction, but a leopard girl shouldered her spirit-siblings out of the way. "Saffron," she declared as she thrust her paw towards the chipmunk.

A little intimidated, Tracy shook it. Saffron immediately gave off a vibe of that one girl who wants all the boys to know she's just as good as them. Her headfur was up in a headband, and her other clothes suggested an aerobics outfit. Plus, however Cassie had gotten her stripes, it looked like Saffron had made use of it too: the yellow of her fur had been taken to a lemony extreme and all her spots were dyed different neon colors. "I really like your fur!" Tracy said.

Saffron looked the newcomer up and down, assessing. She grinned. "'Course you do." The tone was a bit rude, but the smile said the compliment was very much appreciated. The leopard stepped back and crossed her arms behind her to let someone else take their turn.

The two she'd nudged out of the way a moment ago both leaned in to grab Tracy's paws and shake them at the same time. Tracy was surprised enough to meet a platypus in real life (she'd only ever seen them in books before), but felt her brain melt when standing next to him was a giant bug!

The platy boy had glossy brown fur and a beak that resembled dark chocolate. Also a purple shirt with a rude joke on it, and no pants. "Good day to you, madame. I am Freddy. My buddy Kevin likes to change species all the time. Today he's an ant."

"Yes you are," Tracy said, gawking. Kevin had normal-little-boy eyes and proportions, but also a bristly red exoskeleton, four arms, a bulbous butt, antennae; the whole nine yards. He also had black jeans and a horror movie tee.

He noticed she was a bit freaked out. "Oh, I'm sorry! Here, is this better?" He squeezed his eyes shut like he was about to barf, then his whole head shimmered and inverted itself into that of a green-furred bunny rabbit. "There. It's what I woke up as this morning at least."

"An ant with a rabbit head!?" Tracy squawked.

"Not the ant part. That's new. I was in a buggy mood this afternoon."

"I guess it's okay with me if you want to be a bug."

"Do you mind if I'm a monotreme?" Freddy slid in to ask. He waggled his eyebrows. "I lay eggs."

"You don't lay eggs," Kevin said. "You're a boy."

"I can if I want to!"

Seeing that those two were now distracted, the giraffe in glasses saw the chance to make her move. She squeezed past them and grinned humongously at Tracy. "Hi! Have you ever played any of the Baron Mind games?"

Tracy blanked. "Um, I'm not sure what they are."

The giraffe looked crestfallen. But then she perked right back up again. "Oh. OH! Wait, that's great! That means I can show them to you! The game shop's got the whole series, and the DVD place has the movies too! They were only released in Japan, but we got some import copies!!"

Tracy could not resist a giggle at this girl's sheer bubbly zeal. She was tall, but not as ridiculously tall as Tracy might have expected a giraffe girl to be. She did have to look up a bit to make eye contact though. Which was doubly odd because the girl's glasses must have had a hellacious prescription on them. The lenses were thick as bread slices. Tracy wondered why a ghost would still need glasses. "Um, I think I forgot your name?"

The giraffe blinked, then winced. "No, I got so excited I forgot to tell you. I'm Eleanor." She leaned in for a pawshake, but Tracy anticipated a hug and opened her arms, so Eleanor opened her arms, but by then Tracy had put out her paw, so Tracy just grabbed it and yanked her into a hug.

After a big squeeze Eleanor stepped aside politely. Tracy was intrigued by the new paw that came her way to shake, as it was attached to a pair of wings. "Violet," the flying squirrel said simply. She had a warm, patient smile and a perceptive glint in her eye. Flaps of skin, exactly like a furred blanket, extended from her wrists, down her sides, and all the way to her feet. Her single garment was a bit like a sandwich: a sheet of shiny bronze fabric connected to ankle bracelets, stretched up to a neck collar, and was mirrored with another layer at the back.

While Tracy was staring at its curve-hugging construction, the young squirrel pulled the chipmunk closer and whispered in her ear, "I'm the sensible one. Everyone else here is nuts." When she pulled back, she let Tracy see a pixyish grin and a big wink.

Tracy giggled. "I love your wings. Can you really fly?"

"Pretty close," she said proudly. She spread them wide to show off. Tracy got a better look at the designs and drawings painted all over them, front and back. Violet was a living art gallery. Fur-dyeing was popular around here.

Tracy looked around. Was that everyone? She could have sworn she'd seen someone else. Oh! There at the back, behind where Freddy and Kevin were talking animatedly, a small dark furball cowered. Tracy figured if the little skunk wasn't going to step forward, she would have to make introductions herself.

She passed by the platypus and now-fully-an-ant-again, overhearing Kevin say, "Geez, this unbalances things even more! Six girls to three boys!"

"That just means we get two each," Freddy replied suavely.

Tracy snorted at that. Yet she also felt a little thrill that these two were already accepting of the idea that she might stay. They didn't even know her yet! She approached the skunkette with a wide smile. "Hi! I'm Tracy, and you are...?" A memory of bedrooms came back. "Oh! If I've met everyone else, then you must be Bonnie, right?"

She was a big-eyed bundle of bashfulness is what she was. Bonnie stared at Tracy, looking both panicked and hopeful, with one paw behind her back and the other covering her mouth. Mumbling while nibbling her knuckles she replied, "Um. Yes."

Tracy felt a wave of empathy. She was a wallflower at school, but she didn't have it this bad. She squatted down a little, since the skunk was definitely the shortest of the bunch. Bonnie had a simple yellow dress, blue eyes, and fur that was almost entirely ebony. There was just a thin white stripe from the bridge of her nose to her forehead, and a splash of it in her tail too. "It's allright if you're shy. I'm usually pretty quiet too."

Hesitantly, Bonnie reached out for a quick shake. "It's not that. It's... I get worried new people won't like me. I have... secrets."

Tracy blinked. "Well. Um. I just found out Nyl's a big weird nerve cluster thingy today and I don't mind that. And," she figured sharing a secret of her own might help, "I was a bedwetter til I was six," she admitted with a twitch.

Bonnie seemed to find this highly intriguing. "Okay. Maybe we will get along then," she said hopefully.

Seeing that Tracy had completed the circle, and heartened by the all-around welcoming mood, Nyl stepped up onto the marble ring. "Everyone! I'm so glad you're all showing our dear guest Tracy the best sides of yourself. I'm especially glad to see a smile out of you, Bonnie."

The skunkette's eyes sparkled with rapture at hearing that. "Yes, Master Nyl!" she shouted back. Then she realized what she'd just said right in front of the new girl. She squealed, slammed her paws over her muzzle, and vanished into thin air.

Tracy raised her eyebrows at that. The skunk had blushed so hard it'd been visible through fur.

Nyl looked ruffled. "Oh. Um! Tracy, I assure you, I don't make anyone call me that."

"Bonnie's got a special thing with "Master Nyl"," Cassie gossiped gleefully.

"She probably teleported back to her room," Eleanor piped up to Nyl. "I'll coax her back out."

He nodded to the giraffe. "Thank you. I'm sure she wouldn't really want to miss this."

Eleanor nodded back, then trotted off southward.

Tybalt stepped over to Tracy. "Sorry. It's probably gonna come out sooner or later that things get a little... 'weird' around here."

She kneaded her paws together at her side and smiled bashfully at him. "I think, maybe, I might be okay with that, actually."



*~*~*~*


Being pulled in every direction at once had never been more enjoyable.

Everyone wanted to show off their favorite things for Tracy. Cassie most of all. She leapt into the mantle of The Explainer, leading their new guest on the grand tour of the mall and rarely stopping to take a breath. Tracy was joyfully overwhelmed just walking around without actually going inside any of the places that were shown off to her. The mall seemed bigger every time she turned a corner. She got the feeling she could explore here for years and never see it all.

Nyl was content to sit this one out. He'd said that, since he and Tracy had already made introductions, he'd take a break and let his mind slip back in his body to rest a while. This seemed like a normal occurrence from the reactions, Tracy observed. She wondered if it took energy to keep up his illusion-self.

Cassie started with the north concourse. First up was a sparkling jewelry store, where she pointed out that none of the display cases had glass in them. She swept her arm through one and it came up dripping with gold necklaces. "We have fashion shows all the time," she said. Freddy added, "And we see how much of this junk we can wear." He held up an arm that was covered to the shoulder in watches. Across from the jeweler's there was a large empty office they used for hockey, wrestling, or other close physical activity. (Tracy did not pick up on that innuendo until hours later.) At the front of the mall was the main entrance: a humongous arched structure that kept rain off customers and looked like splashes of paint frozen in time. The first two areas past the entrance were a craft store that had become Cassie's thoroughly-bedazzled bedroom ('Of course she'd want to be right up front,' Tracy thought with a grin), and the food court. Lovely smells surrounded the place. Tracy waded through the herds of tables to check out the eateries. Lots of franchises she enjoyed, including her favorite Mexican place. Also, they had one of those tiny shops with the excruciatingly expensive cinnamon buns. The ones that smelled sooo good. Tracy was overjoyed when Violet reached her hand right through the glass and plucked one out of the display case for her. Tracy didn't even notice that another one took its place instantly. She was too busy cramming gooey goodness into her muzzle. "And we're all dead, so calories don't matter!" Violet noted.

Next was the east wing. Cassie pointed out shops selling perfume ("Sometimes we play tag, running around trying to spritz each other," she said), scooters ("The floors in here are GREAT for racing!" said Tybalt) and lingerie ("Those two are always in there," the tigermouse said, pointing to Kevin and Freddy. "Bras make the best slingshots for water balloons," the platypus defended). In the center of the aisle was also a newsstand with rows of candy bars and tall shelves packed with colorful stuffed animals. Tracy ooohed at them. Cassie said, "We can duplicate anything here. There's a room that's floor-to-ceiling stuffies! You can just jump right in! Great for stress relief!" Tracy could not wait to try that. Down further was the aforementioned plush room, plus more stores full of calendars, gift baskets, or shoes. Tracy saw intricate shoebox fortresses constructed inside. At the very end of the hall was one of the two big department stores. Tracy couldn't see inside, because a sail-sized patchwork of bedsheets was covering the front. Before she could ask about it, Kevin pointed to a strange machine nearby that almost looked like an automatic tennis ball returner. "The mall never had a theater in it unfortunately, so we made our own. That's the projector. We built that thing ourselves!" Tracy let out a loud, "Wow!"

Doubling back, Cassie led the way to the west section. Eleanor pointed out that the bulk candy store was right beside the video game place. "Good for snacking during pauses. Kevin and I cracked all the demo machines so they'll play everything like normal. And we found some other systems in the department stores too. Plenty to share." She demonstrated this principle by entering the candy store, jamming her hand into a tub of gummi bears, and cramming as many into her mouth as she could. They went everywhere. Tracy giggled and tried a pawful of chocolate almonds. Mmmm! She guessed that she didn't have to worry about using scoops, since there were no spirit germs. Cassie continued on, rhapsodizing about some of the big-name clothing stores, but Tracy was more enamored of the bookshop they passed. She could spend weeks reading in there. And they had music too! Something she had not taken notice of was that, all along the perimeter of the ceiling, there were alcoves for fluorescent lights. While Tracy was gazing at paperbacks, Saffron gave her a shove. "That's my bedroom," she said, and pointed up. Tracy was amazed to see that it was actually inside one of these lighting alcoves: a trough-shaped space crammed with mattresses, posters, and clothes. Nets full of other possessions dangled off the side. Tracy looked all around, not seeing any ladders. "How do you get UP there!?" Saffron grinned, showing off her feline teeth. She dashed towards the wall, then went running straight up it as if gravity didn't matter. Tracy's mouth was hanging open when the leopardess waved proudly from her upper bunk.

Heading back down towards the south end, Violet indicated the fountain-tower and modestly bragged that she practiced gliding from it every day, and was so close to getting all the way across to touch the movie screen. Tybalt also explained to Tracy that, if she thought this place was a good fit for her and she ever wanted to move in, there was always space for another bedroom. Several stores with similar goods could be consolidated, and she could build her own bed and decor from stuff in the department stores. He actually lived in a tent in the outdoor section of Granger's, since it was relatively quiet there. Tracy thought that sounded nice. She told him she couldn't believe everyone was so accepting of her. He chuckled. "Even with all this cool stuff, sometimes it can get a little boring. The best way to make it all fun again is to share it with someone new." Tracy very much liked the idea of being someone new to share with. Speaking of that, when they passed by Bonnie's room, Eleanor was just then succeeding at bulldozing her out the door. The skunk looked mortified to see Tracy, but the chipmunk just gave her an 'I honestly don't mind' shrug. Bonnie looked like she couldn't believe it, then smiled a tiny smile, and joined the rest of the kids at the back of the parade.

Since Tracy had already seen the bottom floor of the south end, Cassie took everyone up the escalators to the upper deck. Tracy was about to lose herself running into the CD store, but then Cassie remembered the chipmunk's amazing tree leap from the day before. Everyone else did too. Soon Tracy was swarmed with congratulations. She blushed, but basked in all of it. Violet and Saffron had made the same jump lots of times, "But I can't believe you tried it without us there to catch you!" the leopard said. "And you've still got bones to break!!" Tracy admitted she didn't know what had come over her, and was more than happy to move on with the tour. She saw a window full of beautiful prom dresses, an ear-piercing place (Violet pointed out her own two silver studs), a pretzel kiosk, and a hidden-from-below hallway that led to an arcade! Eleanor said, "They still take tokens, but we busted open the token machine so that's no problem. And you don't have to spend all day on skeeball to get tickets for the big prizes. Just jump over the counter if you feel like it!" Saffron nudged Tracy. "By the way, you cannot beat me at Dance Till You Die," she challenged. Tracy blushed. "Maybe I'll try." She thought with all her running to the beat, she might have an advantage. "Hey, I've only won against her twice," Tybalt admitted.

As the group headed back downstairs for some lunch, Freddy pointed over the edge. "It's awesome to clear out one of the clothing stores and make a big pile to leap into from up here. Or we'll knock the heads off mannequins with baseball bats to see how far they go. Oh! And see the big escalator back there? Sometimes we'll have it snow real hard and go tobogganing down it. And in the summer, we flood the whole downstairs and make it a waterslide!" Tracy was intrigued, but worried. "But the toy store down there! Won't everything get ruined?" "Nah," the platy said with a handwave, "We can make the water go wherever we want, or stop. We could even flood the whole place and still keep our bedrooms dry." Eavesdropping, Cassie suddenly shouted, "OhmiGOD we should DO that!! We could swim up and touch the skylights!!"

The group headed for the food court and found their guardian angel waiting for them in a chef's hat. "Wilkommen, senoritas and garçons! It is my pleasure to serve you. What would you enjoy today?"

Grins lit up and kids all dashed over and around the tables. Tracy was left behind bepuzzled, but soon saw for herself exactly what the game was. All the other kids ran to their favorite restaurants and started shouting out orders. Nyl challenged himself to see how fast he could blink around, popping up beside cash registers and whipping up trays full of steamy entrees.

What to choose though? Tracy knew she liked Caliente's burritos, but the Chinese place looked good too. On the other hand, everyone else would be eating by the time she'd finished reading over the menus. Little Sicily was closest and had three pizzas rotating in the display window. Simple choice. Tracy dashed over and whistled for Nyl's attention. The angel looked a little out of breath, but glowing from the happiness of making his cubs happy. When Tracy put her order in, she was surprised to see that Nyl didn't actually take a slice from on display. He simply pushed a tray towards her and food magically appeared. "Neat!"

At the chance to explain something, Cassie also magically appeared. "Yeah! Nyl doesn't just make stuff happen, he's pulling up stuff that's already here."

Tracy looked a little confused at that, so the angel clarified. "I'm drawing on the memories of people who shopped and worked here. Anything they can remember touching, I can recall."

Tracy looked down at her pizza. "So someone else has eaten this exact same slice before. Huh."

"Probably several of us," Cassie noted. "Let's go! Come sit by me!"

As Tracy was shanghaied away, she called to Nyl, "Gonna eat with us too?"

"Be there in a jif!"

Cassie enthusiastically frog-marched Tracy over to the biggest table in the center of the food court, where everyone else was already setting their trays down. The tigermouse started eagerly stuffing herself with curly fries and barbecue ribs. Tracy sat, and Freddy was to her left.

"So," the platy said, "did Tybalt tell you about his intense living situation?"

Tracy had just opened her mouth to respond with concern, when the pun hit her. She grimaced. Freddy cackled. "You should be spanked for that!"

"Is that a promise?" he asked brightly.

She kicked his chair and he chortled.

Chatter mostly stopped as the cubs focused on their meals. Tybalt carefully chopsticked his stir-fried vegetables. Bonnie sipped hot cocoa, while beside her Eleanor shoveled into a banana split with an almost-nauseating enfoldment of toppings. Kevin had followed Freddy in getting big sloppy cheeseburgers. Saffron had a pita wrap. Violet slurped spaghetti. And when Nyl finally got a chance to sit down, he had just a simple salad.

Tracy very much enjoyed her sausage, olive and onion slice, though it was so big and floppy she had to roll it up on the sides like a cigar. While she nibbled, she took the opportunity to observe everyone else's interactions. Bonnie seemed to like everyone, but Eleanor was the only one she was close to. Violet, Saffron and Tybalt looked like they had a friendly rivalry going on between them. Cassie kind of monitored everyone to make sure they were having a good time. Freddy and Kevin seemed inseparable, though Tracy also observed Kevin and Eleanor, and Freddy and Tybalt, making plans for hanging out later. Violet seemed a bit aloof; comfortable with everyone, but also comfortable with her own company. And Nyl was completely neglecting his salad, just watching over his cubs with a contented smile and his head resting on his hand. His love for all of them appeared genuine and steadfast.

Tracy realized that no one was here to make her finish her crust if she didn't want to, and the food was only a memory anyway so nothing would go to waste. When she finished her last bite, she flicked on her music player to check the time. "Yikes! I should be getting home soon!" The time had flown by way too fast.

"Awwww!" Cassie pouted. "I had activities planned for when we finished eating!"

"They can wait for tomorrow," Nyl said patiently, patting her on the head.

"I am really sorry! I'd love to stay," Tracy told her, and everyone else. She stifled a small burp. "I just hope I'll be hungry enough for dinner by the time I get home. Which reminds me, how'm I gonna get back inside my body?"

"Don't worry. Nyl can get you back in," Tybalt reassured. "You might even try reincorporating yourself."

Tracy thought that sounded like an interesting challenge. She smirked to Nyl. "Race you there!" Then she vaulted over the back of her chair and took off running.

She giggled all the way to the fountain, but of course the angel was already there waiting for her. "Never race someone who can travel by thought," he advised.

"Maybe if I keep practicing I'll beat you someday," she said, happily winded.

The other kids caught up soon enough (Eleanor had brought her split along and was slurping the last drips). They clustered around to say their farewells.

Tracy couldn't help getting misty-eyed. "Today was wonderful. Thank you. All of you! Tomorrow's a school day, but so long as I don't get roped into chores, I'll be back. And then it'll be Saturday so..." A too-good-to-be-true idea occurred to her. "Maybe I can tell Mom 'n Dad I'm going to a sleepover! If I can pull it off, I could spend the whole weekend here!" Her heartbeat quickened at such an awesome possibility.

"We'd love that," Cassie said earnestly, giving the chipmunk's paws a squeeze.

"Yeah, you seem like a lot of fun. And... cute," Kevin admitted shyly.

Tybalt patted her arm. "We definitely want you back."

"Definitely," Violet agreed.

"Me too," Bonnie piped up, then gave Tracy the adorablest tiny smile.

Cassie literally jumped for joy. "Oh this is gonna be GREAT! I can FEEL it! Tracy's gonna absolutely ace the devotions!"

At that sound of that word, the mood instantly got awkward. Lots of "um..."ing. Freddy made a 'cut it out' gesture across his throat.

Tracy didn't know what to feel. Devotions? Were these trials she'd have to take to be included? Or some kind of hazing? Her tummy rumbled.

"That's... a little premature, Cassie," Nyl told her, his tone conveying both admonishment and understanding of her excitement. "And it is entirely for Tracy to decide. She has to get home now. We can discuss the possibility next time."

The striped mousie lowered her head. "You're right, Nyl. I'm sorry." She gave a quick peek to Tracy. "Don't get scared though. They're fun. We all did 'em."

"Next time," Nyl reiterated.

"I just didn't want her going home worryin' about 'em all night!" Cassie defended.

"I actually do appreciate that," Tracy noted.

Nyl reached out to gently rustle both girls' headfur. "It's settled for now. Tracy, you'd better get back into yourself. Would you like to try doing it on your own?"

"I'll do my best," she said. She hopped up onto the marble ring. Everyone was looking up at her. 'I'll stop being able to see them once I'm 'alive' again,' she realized. "Goodbye, everyone. I'll see you again, I promise. No matter what."

"See you soon," Saffron said, and gave her tennis shoe a send-off pat.

Tracy smiled to all of them, then looked down at her snoozing self. There was the brief worry that maybe this wouldn't work and she'd end up bodiless forever, doomed to walk the earth as a lost soul. 'No. I trust Nyl,' she reassured herself. And even so, it wouldn't be so bad if that did happen.

Deciding to be bold, Tracy plugged her nose, jumped, and did a cannonball into herself.

There was a humongous splash. Her eyes shot open. The mall was completely empty again.

She gulped air, feeling lightheaded. Her skin was tingly and her paws felt heavy. Definitely disorienting, but nothing she couldn't handle. She looked all around. The other cubs were gone. Nyl was gone. The illusion was gone too. She was all by herself in an abandoned mall fountain. "Geez, and I'm naked too!" she remembered. Thank goodness the water had also vanished. She didn't want to have to imagine running home through November weather in wet fur. She'd freeze solid!

Blushing, but not nearly as embarrassed anymore, Tracy simply stood up, climbed down, and got dressed. There was a bit of remaining dizziness in her head, like last summer when she'd gotten off the boat ride, but she thought a bit of activity would reorient her flesh and spirit. She loaded her music player back in her pocket and realized it had been lying right out in the open where anyone could steal it. 'Then again, so was I'. But of course, that was a silly thought. Nyl would have kept anyone out who'd do something like that.

She pulled her laces tight and got up, jogging in place for a few steps. She took in one last look before leaving. The sun shone brightly through the ceiling glass, illuminating dust motes in the air that almost looked like snowflakes.

"Goodbye," she said again quietly. "See you soon."

She took off running towards the exit, working her essence back into her body with each step until she found her groove again.

When she was almost to the gap in the boards, Nyl's voice spoke from an indistinct point, "You're always welcome here."

Tracy smiled all the way home.



*~*~*~*


The next day at school, she debated which of her friends she could ask a big, big favor from. They were all the type of friendships where they only saw one another during class or at lunch. All of them had closer friendships than her. Tracy eventually settled on Marissa, who seemed the most generous.

The little rabbit winced a bit when Tracy brought it up. She liked to help her friends, but Tracy wasn't a 'big, big favor' type of friend. The chipmunk was kind of spacey. A girl who got lost in her own thoughts so much, sometimes you'd have to get her attention twice to say something to her. Thankfully she didn't want to borrow money or anything.

"Look, I'll give my mom your phone's number instead. If she calls during the weekend- which she might not!- just rush through an answer. Like, 'Yeah we're having lotsa fun gotta go bye!' If you could have loud music or the TV on, that'd be even better."

"I feel weird about lying to your mom," Marissa said. "Where are you gonna be anyway? I mean, you could come over for real, I guess," she said, visibly unsure about the idea but trying to be polite about it.

The rabbit was relieved to see that Tracy hadn't even noticed the offer. Instead the chipmunk blushed a lot. "Um, don't tell anyone? But I'm sneaking off to see a secret boyfriend."

"Ohhhhh." That made everything make sense. "Allright then. I'll cover for you. Lemme guess, is he older? Is he a Pred?"

"Both," Tracy admitted vaguely.

Marissa giggled. She knew parents could get all horrified about things like that.



*~*~*~*


Tracy shot home from school that afternoon, eager to ditch her backpack and go running to the mall. She'd gotten home in the nick of time last night, bumbling through the door just as everyone else was sitting down in front of the TV with their food. Take-out again. Mom and Dad cooked exactly often enough to keep up appearances and no more. But she ate, and watched, and made conversation. And before she went to sleep, she put her pillow between her legs and damn near ground it to powder thinking about her afternoon.

The cars were gone again; that was a good sign. But when Tracy shut the door behind her, two fuzzy heads popped out from the kitchen.

"Mom just left! She said she knew you'd be home soon!" Trent said.

"Yeah, you gotta take care of us!" Trixie added.

"Mom said so!" Trent affirmed.

"Gimme a juice!" Trixie demanded.

Tracy growled a bit at being drafted without consent. She trudged into the kitchen and got Trixie her juice box, and then Trent wanted one too, so then Trixie wanted the cartoon-shaped crackers to go with it, and then Trent did too.

Tracy sat at the dining room table with her homework while keeping an eye on the two little buzzsaws racing around the living room. It really wasn't that bad watching over them. She was just irked at missing out on an afternoon with Nyl & Company. The twins were busy playing sheriff and princess: Trent repeatedly rescuing Trixie as she kept getting herself in various perils. They weren't even being that loud. And they were long past their ear-biting phase.

As Tracy watched them play, the thought she'd almost said during her first meeting with Nyl returned to her. She let the words come this time, to face them. 'They don't even feel like my brother and sister.' She shivered at the admission, and realized she felt more sad than ashamed now. 'I feel like their babysitter. All the time. I mean, I love the little sprouts. They're sweet. And I think they love me too. It's just...' There was a connection missing. A place in her heart where, when she looked at them, there should have been a feeling there that wasn't.

'Just like I don't feel like Mom and Dad's daughter anymore. I feel like the maid. We've got two maids here: Candice and me. It's just that she goes home at the end of her shift and I don't.'

It wasn't even that she felt overworked. Not like some whiny kid who thinks her parents treat her like Cinderella. She didn't mind washing dishes or vacuuming. She minded that, sometimes it felt like Mom told her to do these things because she couldn't think of anything else to do with her.

Trixie was starting to climb the china cabinet.

Tracy leapt up. "Hey, hey, HEY!!"



*~*~*~*


When she woke that Saturday morning, Tracy had decided something within herself. She did not speak it aloud. She felt selfish and horrible and ungrateful about it, but that didn't stop it from being true.

She got up, tossed off her pajamas, got dressed, gargled mouthwash, and went downstairs to breakfast.

"Hey Mom, I forgot to tell you, I uh, got invited to a sleepover yesterday. Is that cool with you?"

Mom wrinkled her nose. She shot a look to Dad, who seemed bewildered to be expected to have an opinion on the subject. "Well it's very nice of you, Tracy, to spring these kinds of plans on me last minute. Did you forget about the salon? We were supposed to have family togetherness this afternoon."

Tracy cringed. "I know. I'm sorry. I did forget."

Mom sighed theatrically. She spent a few moments weighing whether to drag her along anyway, or to be glad that at least the little shut-in was trying to socialize. "Fine. When are you going?"

"R-right now, if that's okay?"

"Eat some breakfast first," Dad said. "You're not supposed to run on an empty stomach, or something."

Tracy pulled up a chair and reached for the cereal. "Thanks. Both of you. I, um, I haven't been on a sleepover before. This really means a lot to me."

Mom sniffed. "I just hope you understand what I'm giving up by letting you go off like this. Have you got your phone in case of emergencies? You never seem to leave the house with it."

"Yes, Mom." This was in fact the reason Tracy had refused Mom's pressure to buy her a fancy new smartphone. She liked her relatively-obsolete music player just as it was, and also liked being unreachable sometimes.

Tracy filled her belly with cereal and juice, trying not to look like she was rushing. Mom was giving her the cold shoulder now, but that was acceptable.

When Tracy got up to leave, she looked back. "Thanks again. I guess I'll see you tomorrow evening. I might eat dinner there."

Mom waved her hand dismissively. "Why would that be a problem? You don't seem to be interested in spending time with your family anyway."

Tracy turned away and did not let herself say aloud, 'Maybe you're right about that.'



*~*~*~*



Tracy couldn't remember a better weekend.

All her family frustrations were burned off by running. She soared past cars and mailboxes, letting solid beats erase her thoughts. But it did occur to her that her route to the mall was basically a giant right angle. That meant that if she could find a diagonal shortcut, she could shave off a considerable amount of time. Might mean cutting through a lot of backyards. She was probably at an age where she could still get away with that, right? Maybe she could look online for a birds-eye map. She wondered if there was a way to search for houses with guard dogs.

Arriving at Heaven Plaza, she decided on a whim to be bold and try a power slide into the gap between the boards. The result was a bit catastrophic. Tracy ended up with a banged knee, a skinned elbow, and a whacked forehead, all at the same time. Still, she was so glad to be here she got up and giggled, saying, "Ow, ow, ow" with every step she limped.

She headed straight for the fountain. She sang out "Helloooo!" at the top of her voice as she ran up the stalled escalator. There was a moment when she'd climbed up over the marble ring and was settling down into the dry, dusty basin where she got nervous that the illusion hadn't returned yet. She was just a little girl in an empty building right then. For a few seconds she was absolutely panicked that Nyl and all the ghosts had decided they didn't like her, so they'd packed up and left.

But then she felt gentle, invisible paws take hold of her shoulders from behind.

"Ready?" Nyl whispered.

Tracy sighed in relief and melted at his touch. "Mmm-hmmm..."

Then he was lifting her up, out of her body, and she opened her eyes to see a mall full of snow and smiling faces.

"Hi, Tracy!!!" a bunch of them shouted.

Tracy said hi back, then turned around and stood on tiptoes to give Nyl a thank-you kiss.

When she turned back, a handsome, fluffy-cheeked tiger boy was reaching out a paw to help her out of the hot tub.

"Oh, are you new?" she asked, stepping down.

"No, I'm Kevin," he replied. He grew some ant mandibles just long enough to pinch-pinch them at her.

She laughed. "You're going to have to teach me how you do that."

"Sure. We got time today."

And they did. Tracy kept having to remind herself that they had an entire weekend to spend together. Not just two measly hours. Nyl asked Tracy if she'd had breakfast already and if she wanted to share theirs. That sounded wonderful. Her run had built her appetite back up.

Since this would be a sleepover, everyone was wearing pajamas today. Though Freddy still refused to wear pants, and Cassie the little exhibitionist had on nothing but a nightcap and bunny slippers, everyone else was sporting colorful, cozy jammies. Even Nyl! Tracy fretted at having forgotten to bring a pair of her own (she'd forgotten to bring anything, actually). Cassie let her know that it was no problemo. Where else was a better place to pick out a brand new pair of her own?

As they walked along, Tracy had another thought. "So is fast food and bulk candy all you guys have to eat?" That stuff was fine, but she thought it might get boring after a few months. Violet was happy to correct her. "Nah, we've got lots more." One of the department stores had a small grocery section, plus East Winds had some Oriental foodstuffs. But besides the food court, there was also a family restaurant and a coney island. The kids could magic up any meal anyone had ever ordered there, plus there were kitchens in the back full of fresh ingredients. And the bookstore had a whole shelf full of cookbooks for when they felt a culinary urge. "I'm not too bad a chef myself," Violet said, "but you've really gotta try Kevin's omelets and Saffron's smoothies." she licked her lips.

In fact, she got to try both. The family restaurant was located near the end of the west section (directly below Saffron's bedroom, which was probably why Tracy hadn't noticed it before). Poulo's was charming, with lots of real-looking flowers and comfy booths. Instead of Nyl playing chef, everyone found a seat and simply wished for their food. Hot plates of pancakes, scrambled eggs and bacon strips appeared. Tracy asked Saffron and Kevin politely about their specialties. While Saffron looked a bit embarrassed to be caught being good at something 'girly' like cooking, Kevin was already darting towards the kitchen to find some eggs. Tracy helped both of them out, chopping fruits and veggies. Soon everyone was eating together, talking with their mouths full and making plans for the day. Tracy heaped praise on the tiger and leopardess for the incredible reuben omelet and blueberry-nana smoothie. Cassie also insisted on sharing her french toast.

Noticing that everyone was bombarding Tracy with suggestions all at once, Nyl held up his hands for a time-out and suggested they be democratic about this. The cubs already agreed that they wanted to watch a movie before bedtime, so that was set. In addition, Nyl suggested that everyone should pick ONE activity they wanted to share with Tracy and write it on a napkin. He'd crumple them up, draw them at random, and each would get their turn. Tracy watched all of them scribbling in secret. Tybalt asked if she wanted to make any napkin suggestions too. The little 'munk was surprised. She told him that, honestly, she didn't mind letting everyone else show her what they enjoyed.

The napkins were collected in a cartoonishly large top hat that Nyl had produced. He gave it a shake, then poured the paper balls out in a line. Tybalt was first. Cassie was psyched about coming in second (though would have preferred first). Then came Freddy. Kevin and Saffron followed, which worked out beautifully because they'd both had the same suggestion. Then it was Violet, Bonnie and Eleanor. The giraffe moaned melodramatically at having to wait all day to get her turn. Nyl wrote everything down on a big whiteboard, then whistled and sent it off to go rotate around the central fountain.



*~*~*~*



Soon everyone's plates were empty and they were licking syrup off their fingers. Freddy and Kevin were comparing the roundness of their full tummies. Tybalt sheepishly told Tracy that his idea was pretty physical, and she might not be interested right after a big meal. Tracy rubbed her belly and said she thought she'd be alright. She was certainly willing to hear him out.

"I was thinking we could go grab some bikes from the scooter store and do a race. That sound okay?"

Tracy lit up. She opened her mouth to say, 'Sure!', but instead a volcanic burp emerged. Everyone giggled and complimented it. Tracy hid under the table for a moment.

Freddy and Cassie offered to clean up the dishes for everyone, and did so by gleefully frisbee-ing them into the kitchen with many loud crashes. The rest of the cubs headed off to Roll Call. It was mostly a shop for things with smaller wheels, but there were three nice bicycles hanging up behind the counter in red, yellow and blue. Tracy instantly chose the yellow one. Tybalt and Saffron pulled it down for her and explained its quirks. These bikes had been hastily-assembled show models after all, so they always needed a few tweaks at the start. Tybalt said that the department store (where he pitched his tent) had a lot of bike parts and accessories, so he'd built his own and custom painted it. But he'd use a stock one for the race to be fair. Tracy blushed a bit. "I used to ride my bike all the time before the weather got goopy. You don't have to make it easy on me," she said. He smirked. "Are you sure? I can give you a head start." She shoved him playfully. "Don't you DARE!" "I can put some training wheels on yours if you want 'em!"

Soon enough though, Tracy was bashfully asking for a few practice laps. This bike was bigger than hers and felt 'stiffer'. Plus she was definitely not used to riding across smooth floors. Turning was precariously slidey. She made a few circles around the fountain while the others cheered her on. Once she felt confident enough, she turned around, skidded to a stop beside Tybalt and his blue bike, and asked about the terms of the race.

Saffron and Violet were quickly dispatched to set up Wet Floor signs outside the entrances of both department stores to the east and west. Violet climbed halfway up the fountain-tower, then slid through the air to the top of the newsstand and took off with another swoop. Saffron avoided obstacles in her way by simply running along the wall sideways. Both girls got their markers set up and hollered back.

The rules were simple. Start inside Roll Call; shoot towards Granger's and loop around the Wet Floor sign; all the way across the mall to Five & Dime for another loop. The finish line was back at the store, with the added challenge of braking before crashing into the shelves.

There was a security sensor on the floor that would be their starting line. Tybalt got all set up and ready. He said normally he and Saffron raced, but the doorway was almost too small for two riders anyway, much less three. "She'll definitely want to take her turn next," he cautioned, while showing his eagerness to see their match-up. Tracy was a bit worried at that. Tybalt had been very helpful getting her bike ready and answering her questions. Saffron seemed more ruthless. Still, she was confident in herself. Riding a bike was nothing more than running with two wheels between your legs, after all. She looked around for a helmet that would fit her, then realized her mother wasn't here to make her put one on. She gripped her handlebars. "I'm ready."

The other cubs were all seated around the marble fountain ring in anticipation. Eleanor and Bonnie were sharing popcorn. Nyl stood beside Roll Call's entrance and magic'd up a whistle. When the competitors were ready, he gave it a blast.

GO!

The first race was a rout. Tracy knew it almost from the start. She'd caught a brief lucky break when Tybalt snagged an antler on the doorframe, but after that he took off like a greased bullet. Tracy punched the pedals but just couldn't keep up. She saw Tybalt's white tail bobbing in front of her the entire time, which would have been a much more pleasant sight if it hadn't meant she was losing. At Granger's, Tybalt pulled off a nearly-suicidal turn, so tight his knee almost scraped the ground. Tracy took it much slower for fear of skidding out. Though seeing Violet cheer for her did give her a boost. She at least caught up to him to bump handlebars on the next straightaway. Tybalt gave her a grin that asked, 'Enjoying yourself?' Her weak smile said, 'I'm trying to!'

She appreciated that he didn't throw the race just to make her feel better, but it still felt sucky to lose so much speed around the second turn. He was already dismounted by the time she limped into last place.

Her heartbeat thudded in her ears. Tybalt put his arm around her shoulder and said she'd done a good job for a first try. And he really did sound sincere. Still, Tracy was miserable. Everyone saw her lose so badly. Part of her heart just wanted to go home right now.

'No,' another part of her said firmly. 'I am NOT gonna be a wimp about this and cry and pout! That's for babies!' She rubbed her eyes with her paws, got her breath under control, and asked, "Do you wanna make it two out of three?"

Tybalt looked ecstatic to see her buck up and ask for a retry. The crowd cheered too.

As Tracy got her bike set up for a second go, she realized there were two big assets she hadn't taken advantage of. One was that she didn't have to be so timid. Her real body was sitting over there safe and sound in the fountain. If she did wipe out, it'd probably hurt, but there'd be no permanent damage. And two, she had a secret weapon. She popped in her earbuds and called up the TNT playlist. One song in particular. The most dangerous ankle-buster of the bunch. Throatpuncher by DJ Crruel. Its title was very accurate to what it felt like.

Tybalt looked over to check on her and was startled by the change in her body language. She really meant to kick his ass this time. He rather liked that.

Nyl counted down to three, then blew his whistle.

Tracy pushed play.

In the two seconds before the beat began, she let Ty exit the store first, not wanting there to be a jumble at the door. Once the way was clear, the song shoved a key in her ignition and fired her engine. Tybalt's jaw dropped at how fast she passed him. Violet was up ahead shouting encouragement. Tracy thought her heart might explode. She could hear absolutely nothing but the most toxic bass in the universe. Beats grabbed her legs and pumped them up and down whether she liked it or not. She was at the first marker in seconds, not letting herself be terrified by taking the turn at full-speed. The song was controlling her now, and she just had to go along with it. Though it was great to pass Tybalt going the other way and see his shocked face!

DJ Crruel kept whipping Tracy's tail all down the straightaway to Five & Dime, where Saffron was punching the air and going nuts. Tybalt put on speed as well, realizing that this was a real fight for first now. Tracy didn't know how close he was, but didn't need to. All that mattered was that he was behind her, and all she needed to focus on was keeping her muscles from exploding.

For a heart-stopping instant she was sure the second turn was going to kill her, but she let her mind go and corrected her equilibrium on instinct. Then it was the home stretch. Up ahead she could see (but not hear) the other kids chanting "GO! GO! GO!" The scooter store was in sight. 'No permanent damage' she told herself, and let herself rocket straight through the doorway without braking.

Tracy was kind of glad the impact had knocked the headphones out of her ears, because she knew there was no way she could move to turn off the music. She was flat on her back in gobsmacked agony. Her bike ended up embedded in the drywall, rear tire still spinning. Merchandise was everywhere.

Then everyone else flooded into the shop, looking both worried and astonished. Tybalt scooped the little shellshocked chipmunk up. "That was incredible! Were you hustling me that first time or what!?"

Tracy tried to make her eyeballs focus. "So I won?" Tybalt just grinned and gave her a congratulatory hug. That felt nice, and Tracy felt her adrenaline slowly subside. "Uh... how about we call it a tie? I don't think I've got another race in me."

Tybalt said that was perfectly fine. She'd earned her retirement. Plus, as Freddy pointed out, her bike was in the wall.

Saffron was pouty at not getting to race against Tracy, but understood that the chipmunk had burned her tank completely empty. Tracy was more than happy to sit on the sidelines with the others and watch the buck and leopard race a few times. Nyl conjured her a glass of water, which was much appreciated. All through the next races, the other kids kept leaning in to congratulate her. And while most of her still felt sore from the crash, that definitely made it worth it.

She worried about the store though. There was a hell of a mess to clean up. Although, at the end of the third race when a beaming Tybalt shook hands with a murderously grouchy Saffron, Tracy got up to congratulate them both and noticed that Roll Call was 100% back to normal. Yet no one had gone in and fixed anything. Her yellow bike was even back on display. She wondered if Nyl had done it, or if the illusion was self-repairing. Something to ask about later.



*~*~*~*



Still a bit winded and wobbly, Tracy was not in shape for anything else physical (at least for a while). So when she heard Cassie's activity idea, it was quite a relief. The tigermouse was supremely overjoyed to get her turn. She deputized Violet and Saffron, and told Tracy that the three of them would be taking her over to Sparkledog Studios for a full-body fur-paint. That sounded lovely. The artistic-minded trio led Tracy towards the upper south floor, while Freddy headed off to set up his own activity, and said for Tracy to join him in Five & Dime when she was ready. Kevin shyly asked if he could tag along and watch her get painted. Tracy thought having an audience might be kind of flattering. Tybalt said he might join in later, but first wanted to try a few laps with his own bike for comparison. Eleanor said she and Bonnie had things to discuss at the bookstore. Nyl said he'd be "around".

Tracy got a little frazzled when she realized she was being taken to the tattoo parlor, but remembered this was not meant to be a permanent dye-job. Though Saffron did point out that her neon spots were permanent. Tracy asked how it was possible to tattoo a ghost. "Simple. I just never want to change back."

What followed was a wonderfully tickly experience. Tracy stood on a stool in the middle of the room while the other three girls all beautified her. They asked what look she wanted. She said she was fine with being surprised. Though she did recall her idea from the day before about stars and moons. Cassie said they could certainly work with that. She told Tracy to close her eyes, then she and the others got to work flitting around her, selecting colors and spritzing them onto their new friend.

Cassie kept up a constant stream of chatter while she worked, letting Tracy know everything about herself, about Nyl, and mall gossip in general. There were some things she was silent about though, and thus Tracy noticed their absence. Cassie hadn't said a word about how she or any of the other cubs had come here. Maybe that was something she'd have ask Nyl about later.

In the meantime, it was exciting feeling the other girls' fingers dancing all over her fur, smoothing it down in places or positioning her limbs to get the right lighting. Tracy kept her eyes closed almost the entire time. Not just because the overhead lamp made her see spots, but because she didn't want to risk a glance in the mirror. She wanted to get the full reveal all at once. It was quietly thrilling to put her trust in her new friends like this. She had to work hard to keep still when Cassie was doodling on her tummy, or when Violet tilted up her head to work on her throat.

Tracy opened one eye a little. "You guys aren't just drawing a bunch of dicks on me, are you?" she kidded.

Violet replied in a perfect deadpan, "No, Freddy's not here, remember?"

Cassie laughed so hard at that she had to sit down on the floor.

Kevin did drop in eventually, after having gotten distracted along the way by a corndog urge. At first it was odd having him sitting there in the corner, grinning bashfully at everyone. But then Tracy thought it might be nice to give him a show. He had been a very polite tiger today, and had made her a very nice omelet. To give the others more area to work with, Tracy stripped right down to her underpants. Kevin clutched his armrests quite firmly. Tracy was blushing, but also pleasantly disbelieving that a boy could be so interested in a plain little chipmunk like her.

Finally the three artists decided they were finished. Cassie still wanted to add a few more stars, but the others overruled her. This was just right.

"Can I look now?" Tracy asked.

"Not yet," Cassie said. Saffron took Tracy's paw to lead her down off the stool, and gently guided her towards a mirror. Tracy shivered pleasantly at feeling the feline's little claws tickle her skin. Cassie was vibrating with anticipation. "Okay, NOW!"

Tracy looked. She gasped. She was amazing.

They hadn't just added some accents to her stripes. They had recolored her head to toe, turning her body into the whole night sky. Her brown fur was now nearly black: the color of dark chocolate. The tan and white on her face had become shimmering nebulae and comets. Stars twinkled all along her arms and legs. They'd even drawn the planets! She giggled when she found the moon on her booty, fittingly enough. And on her face, her right eye was now Saturn, encircled with golden rings. She wanted to cry it was so beautiful, but didn't dare to in case it made the paint run. "This is gorgeous! It's more than I ever could have imagined! You did an amazing job!!"

Cassie's smile was bright as the sun. "Thanks! We get lots of practice. I switch from stripes to spots to polka dots all the time. Sometimes I even change species, though with art, not like Kevin. He lets us practice on him too." The little tiger nodded eagerly. "Tybalt definitely loves it, though he usually wants boring stuff. He doesn't let us get into outlandish colors. I think a hot pink deer would look cute!" Tracy chortled.

"And my stuff's just practice too," Violet said, indicating the drawings all over her wings. "These two have done whole paintings on me. Saffron's good at backgrounds and colors, but Cassie's amazing with fine details. Did you notice the satellite?" Tracy looked, and indeed there was one orbiting her ankle.

The clock on the wall said she'd spent well over an hour being a canvas. Tracy hoped Freddy wasn't bored sick waiting on her to finish up. She thanked Cassie & Crew extensively again, really wanting to give them all big hugs but not wanting to smear her fur. Cassie said not to worry; this stuff dried quick and she'd be ready to snuggle soon enough. The chipmunk thought her paint was too good to cover up entirely, so she compromised and put only her shirt back on. She dashed off for the west section, leaving the others to decide what to draw next. The last thing she heard was Saffron saying, "We already got out the black and the white. Why not make Violet a pirate flag?"



*~*~*~*



Five & Dime, Tracy reminded herself, was the department store without the giant movie screen draped over it, and also the one Tybalt did not live in a tent in. She passed the bookstore on her way over and peered through to see if she could spot Bonnie and Eleanor. Yup; there near the back, the little skunk was reading on the giraffe girl's lap. Awww. Tracy stepped inside Five & Dime not knowing exactly where Freddy would be. The store looked entirely normal from the front entrance; full of ladies' fashions and blank-faced mannequins. Tracy hopped up onto a jeans display to see farther into the store. She saw perfume, watches, and the edge of menswear, but no platypus.

"Freddy? Am I late? Are you still here? ...Did you fall asleep?"

"KNEEL BEFORE YOUR GOD!!!"

Tracy shrieked at the booming voice and nearly toppled backwards off the display.

"Ha! Sorry, that was too good to pass up," Freddy said over the PA. "C'mon up the elevator! I'll be waiting!"

Tracy headed there, but also figured she might grab something along the way to wallop him over the head with.

A smooth ride later, Tracy saw the platy boy standing like a showman in the middle of the department. He had certainly been busy.

Tracy at first thought he wanted her to admire his sculptures. He'd piled up gigantic mounds of TVs, toasters, coffeemakers, DVDRs, stereo systems, cameras and landline phones. There was even a stack of dishwashers that she didn't know how he'd managed to move. Freddy wiggled in silent anticipation as he watched Tracy try to puzzle it out.

When she finally gave up and asked, he gave her a gleefully evil grin and, with a theatrical flourish, pulled away a tarp revealing a neatly-arranged row of lethal implements. A golf club, a baseball bat, a claw hammer, a sledgehammer, a crowbar, and a chainsaw.

Tracy suddenly got the meaning. "That's it!? You just want me to smash stuff!? I can't! It's... it's..."

He put his arm around her shoulder like a sleazy used car salesman. "Why can't you? Who's stopping you? We've got the whole store all to ourselves, and noooo grownups. Haven't you ever wanted to? Look at all those TVs! How can you resist the urge? Something you'd get in SO much trouble for normally. But then... nothing's normal here, is it?"

Tracy was tempted. Such destructive impulses did not normally occur to her. Good little girls did not smash expensive merchandise with crowbars. Though, didn't she sometimes want to throw her laptop out the window when the internet was slow? Once in a while, didn't she get so frustrated at school she wanted to take an axe to her desk? She looked over at Freddy and expected him to have little red devil horns. "I mean, it's just Nyl's illusion. And it'll all reappear, right?"

"Oh, absolutely. Just like the mess in the scooter shop. Kudos on that, by the way. Excellent technique."

She blushed. She looked at the tools and nibbled her lip. She reached for the hammer. Freddy was wild-eyed with excitement to witness her corruption. The cast iron head was ridiculously heavy, so Tracy had to hold the handle in both paws. She gingerly approached the nearest pile of goods, unable to resist checking left and right for security guards. She chose an innocent little chrome toaster as her victim. Raised the hammer to shoulder height. Then let it swing down and... *ping* It barely left a dent.

Freddy chortled. "Naw, sister, not like that. Like this!" With zero hesitation, he bent down and grabbed the sledgehammer, then swung it up and over his head like he was trying to ring the bell at a carnival. KA-SMASHH!!! Shards of glass and plastic flew like snow in a blizzard. Freddy giggled maniacally and went apeshit, causing hundreds of dollars in property damage with every swing. Tracy was horrified for a few moments. Then she started feeling envious of his fearless glee. She decided to try swinging the hammer a little harder.

It did not take long to lose herself in the complete and utter mischief of it all. No adults! No consequences! Nothing but the heft of the swing and the crack of impact. Tracy started to love the jangling thud of DVDRs flattening. And in addition to Freddy's mounds, there was a whole wall of TVs surrounding the department. Tracy made it her mission to bust every last one. It was even more fun when they were turned on! There were sparks and static and sometimes the picture froze on a fractured image. One time the screen got stuck on a newscaster's face, with his mouth duplicated all over the right half of the screen. Tracy laughed her tail off.

Though she almost had a heart attack when a paw clapped down on her shoulder and a gruff voice said, "Mall security, ma'am!" She whirled around to see a goofily smiling tiger. "Hi! Figured I'd follow you and see what crazy shit Freddy'd think up. Nice fur, by the way." Tracy thanked him and asked if they did stuff like this often. "Oh yes," Kevin said. "One time we laid out all the mattresses in the store and drove over 'em on a riding lawnmower." Tracy could only imagine the explosions of fluff and springs. Freddy popped up and reminded him of their adventures with the homemade gasoline-powered potato cannon.

Tracy and the deadly duo ended up destroying almost everything in electronics, until they were ankle deep in smashed bits. They didn't stop there though, indulging in a bit of refrigerator dominoes, and rolling washing machines and dishwashers down the escalator.

When all three were reduced to lying on the floor laughing themselves sick, Kevin suggested that maybe it might be time to take a break. It was his turn after all. And Tracy had to admit, they didn't have much left to smash.

She asked what the tiger cub had in mind. "Actually, me 'n Saffron were both thinking arcade, so we can head on over and do that, or if you had something in mind yourself, that's fine too."

Tracy thought a bit. "Well, this is a mall. There's lots I haven't seen yet. Why not some shopping?"

That sounded fine to the boys. The arcade was all the way over in the south end anyway, so they could take their sweet time moseying over. Tracy knew she couldn't take anything home with her, but she could at least look.

As they walked together towards the escalators, Freddy asked if she'd had fun. Tracy said "Absolutely!", and thanked him with a hug for helping her lose her inhibitions. He said he was very happy to see her laughing and swinging away, and his only regret was that they'd forgotten to fire up the chainsaw. Tracy pouted when she realized it was true. "Though we do have another problem," Freddy said.

"What's that?"

He pointed down the escalator to the absolute cataclysm of boxy appliances at the bottom.

Tracy gawked. "Oh poop." They had not thought this through. "How do we make them, um, not be there anymore?"

"Stop thinking about them," the platy said blithely.

"Oh poop."



*~*~*~*



They ended up having to hold hands and navigate the dangerous dishwasher terrain like mountaineers (which was better than Freddy's other idea of busting out the windows and rappelling down to the first floor on extension cords). Once they were safe on level ground, Tracy decided to take a detour through the girls' clothing section. Remembering that this was a sleepover, she found a really cute pair of green jammies with an oak leaf print. She took them to the changing room and announced loudly that she hoped no naughty boys would follow her and peek. She blushed a lot while she switched clothes, but enjoyed hearing muffled giggles outside the door.

Tracy could have run to the arcade in about two minutes, but instead they took a leisurely half hour. Tracy gave all the shops along the way at least a cursory peek. Her first stop would have been the bookstore, but a glance inside showed that one little skunk and one little giraffe had progressed from just lap-sitting. Tracy turned red and gave them some privacy. Freddy made a not-disapproving-at-all joke about it, and Tracy asked him if stuff like that was common here. "Well, we've been toning it down a bit until we're sure how the new kid'll react. But she seems pretty okay with naughty stuff so far." Tracy didn't exactly confirm that, but she did smile bashfully and wonder how far the naughtiness went. In the next store down, a fashionable ladies' boutique, she amused the boys by modeling lacy undies over her pajamas. All three emerged with bra-hats.

The trio shared a basket of cheese sticks from a fast food place. They poked around the novelty shop, where Tracy was a bit alarmed to note how much of the stuff was "adult" novelties. She'd never seen so many dicks and boobies! She was about to ask the boys if these things ever got used, but their grins told her plenty enough. Much more wholesome was the toy store nearby, which seemed like an outlet for Christmastime overstock. Plenty of fun stuff though, and it was electrifying to just rip open the packaging of anything she felt like. Tracy squeezed some plushies, sprayed some silly string around, turned on all the battery-operated animals, and had fun chasing the boys out of the store by driving an RC car into their ankles. Freddy had acquired a ridiculous pair of fuzzy red & green light-up deely-bobbers.

Tracy looked at the pretty pictures in the art store, browsed t-shirts in the darkened shop where all the teenagers hung out, tried on a few diamond rings at the jewelry store, then finally remembered that she wanted to ask Kevin about his shapeshifting abilities. He hopped up on the counter and tried to describe it. "It's kind of hard to say. I just... want it. I was always pretending to be something else, even in kindergarten. So like, I guess the desire came true once I got here?" Freddy was wandering around with jeweler's loupes in both eyes, bumping into things. Kevin tried to give Tracy a beginner's lesson. He put his paws on her cheeks and told her to close her eyes. Tracy was wary that this might be a lead-up to surprise tickles or a pantsing. But the changeable cub was quite serious. He asked her to picture something about her appearance she'd always wanted to be different. The stronger the desire the better: she needed to overcome the part of her brain that'd say this was impossible. Tracy focused on her buck teeth. Her big, silly, clowny, annoying buck teeth. As Kevin talked in a soft, hypnotic voice, she pictured them shrinking. Just a bit. This was her first time after all, she didn't want to get too ambitious.

"Take a look," Kevin said. He held up a small mirror.

Tracy opened her mouth, then opened her eyes. Unreality dizzied her. It worked! Her two front teeth were small and shapely, just like she'd always wanted! She ran her tongue all over them, feeling the difference. So much prettier! Just like Mom's! Tracy blinked. That thought kind of soured the moment.

And for the first time, she found herself asking if that was exactly where she'd developed her dislike of them.

Freddy finally noticed. "Awwww," he whined. "I liked 'em how they were! They were adorable!"

Startled, Tracy looked to see if he was teasing. Nope. And Kevin nodded agreement too.

She looked back in the mirror, then did a double take. Her teeth were back to normal. She hadn't even tried for that! She was left standing there discombobulated.

Kevin patted her shoulder. "Maybe you didn't really want to change them after all."

Tracy considered that.

Or at least she did until they got to the bulk candy store and the sweet smells filled her thoughts instead. They all sampled heavily, and soon ended up in a fistful-flinging food fight. Freddy also pointed out PixelBusters next door and said he'd have loads of games to recommend later.

Before turning south, Tracy took a moment to check up on her body. Still sleeping. Still looking fine. She squoze her hands and paws a few times though, just to keep up her circulation. When she was satisfied and headed down the south concourse, Kevin was happy to show off his bedroom. Almost every surface, floor-to-ceiling, was crammed full of action figures. Tracy said she hoped there'd never be an earthquake. "Actually that'd be fine," he said. "Then I'd get to rearrange 'em all again!" Up past the escalators, Tracy stopped herself from going in the music store, knowing she'd be in there so long they'd never get to the arcade. All those CDs... She certainly hoped she could find a way to get the songs on her music player. Completely on impulse, she whipped it out and swiped it through a pile of discounted disks. To her absolute astonishment, when she brought up the screen, it had worked. All the songs on every CD she'd touched had transferred over. She grinned with audio lust. "Someone drag me away from here, quick!!" she shouted. Oh, she would DEFINITELY be coming back soon! Kevin calmed her mania with a fresh hot pretzel from Kned's Knots, and Freddy ushered her into the Asian goods store. It had a nice, calming atmosphere, with soft koto music and incense. Tracy was enamored with the cute little Zodiac animal figurines.



*~*~*~*



Finally they came to the arcade, which was unmistakably named ZING-TOWN in glowing gargantuan letters above the entrance. It was dark as a cave inside, lit by all the blinking, beeping, zonking, tooting cabinets. Saffron was already there, whacking moles with a mallet so fiercely it was a wonder she didn't drive the whole machine into the floor. Tracy was left a bit dazzled, trying to look everywhere all at once. Freddy and Kevin ran to the token machine, which had been crowbarred open and a huge pile of gold was all over the floor. They started stuffing their pockets. Kevin brought over a double handful for Tracy, and Freddy ducked behind the prize counter to fetch them all a cornucopia of candies.

Saffron's machine whooped and blinked her score. She noticed the others. She was panting hard and dripping, flushed with triumph. "Oh, hi! Finally you got here!" She pounced over, paused just long enough to admire her art on Tracy's fur, then gave her a big squeeze. "I've been beatin' the hell outta moles waiting on you! I saw yesterday how you looked when I mentioned Dance Till You Die. Can't wait. And I'm already sweaty, so maybe you might have the thinnest, tiniest, most microscopic chance of winning."

Tracy was a bit overwhelmed by the energetic kitty's sheer presence. "Well I'll try as hard-"

"Nah, you'll still lose." Saffron threw Tracy a 'chase me' wink and ran off towards the game, whapping her on the nose with her tailtip as she sped by.

Tracy felt warm. She did not understand why, but she kind of enjoyed being embarrassed by Saffron. She ran off through the maze of games to find her.

It wasn't easy though. The dance games were all the way at the back, past the basketball toss, the pinball machines, and those 'games' that existed purely to lure you in with unwinnable prizes to gobble all your tokens. Though Tracy realized that now she had the option to just smash open that glass dome and grab the Z-Scape 180 inside if she felt like it. Nah, she had a game to win. Or at least not lose too badly at. She wove her way through unending cabinets, all trying to get her attention with lights and sounds and gimmicky peripherals. Tracy saw the usual garish plastic shotguns and steering wheels, but also some maracas, a rubber chicken, and a huge squashy foam butt.

Saffron was tapping her foot and twitching her tail when Tracy finally found her. "SLOWPOKE!" she shouted, grinning with those little fangs.

Blushing and squirming, Tracy took her place beside the leopardess. "Um, I've seen these before but I've never actually played one."

Saffron popped in some tokens and sneered. "It's easy. Arrows come down. Paws on arrows. Keep up with me." The game boomed to life, the brightness of the screen nearly blinding Tracy. "And if you hold onto the bar you're a pussy!"

Tracy squeaked. She'd just been about to.

Needless to say, Saffron annihilated Tracy in three out of three games. Tracy enjoyed every second of it. Her athletic legs had no problem with the dancing part, it was just getting the correct arrows from her eyes to her brain to her feet. Still, the challenge was fun, and she ended up as sweaty as Saffron. The leopardess had her eyes cemented to the screen the entire time. Never even looking at Tracy; concentrating wholly on being perfect. She moved like an engine piston. Like she'd spent whole nights till dawn practicing on these lighted pads. Tracy definitely got the sense that, while Tybalt liked competition, Saffron liked winning. And that was fine. Her bully-ish demeanor was an obvious act, since she couldn't keep the, 'I really like you' out of her eyes whenever she trash-talked.

At the end of the third game, Tracy collapsed on the bar while Saffron spun in a circle, pumping her fists in the air. Tracy saw that the entire board of high scores was all S.A.F. over and over and over. "You were really good," Tracy panted.

Saffron ran in place, pointing at her. "Yeah, and you LOST! Because you're a loser who SUUUUCKS!" she hooted. She strode past, right through Tracy's space. Though she also spared a second to sneak a kiss behind the chipmunk's ear and whisper, "Actually, you did fine."

Tracy got hot as a firecracker and followed after the leopardess' swishy tail.

Both of them took turns glugging from the water fountain until it was nearly drained dry. Kevin showed up to suggest another game, and Saffron said she'd graciously allow Tracy to have a break from getting relentlessly pummeled. The fighter jet game Kevin showed her was comparatively calmer, and it had a rocking cockpit you could actually sit down in! Greatly appreciated! Tracy was surprised steam wasn't coming off of her legs. Plus the game was co-op, so that was a nice respite as well.

Tracy ended up playing a few rounds of a fighting game with Freddy (which she was pretty hopeless at), another game with Kevin involving runaway dinosaurs, then she shot some hoops with Saffron while the boys made bets. Basketball was at least a little easier than the dancing game, though Saffron still trounced her, and Kevin ended up losing 200 tokens.

After her victory dance, Saffron suggested a racing game that she could continue kicking Tracy's butt in. But Tracy had another idea. She asked if she could get a lesson in wall-running. The leopardess squinted at her, internally debating whether it was better to show off, or to guard her secrets. Tracy asked if it worked at all like Kevin's face-changing. Saffron was impressed that she'd made the connection.

"Yeah. It's all about will, and getting over that part of yourself that thinks you're still alive. C'mere a second." She ushered Tracy out of the arcade to the edge of the balcony overlooking the lower floor. Not too far from where Tracy had made her tree-jump, which Saffron re-congratulated her on. Tracy wiggled. "Now look. This whole thing's an illusion. Try to see it. Realize that we're just ghosts and Nyl's putting on a show for us. Try to see through it."

It was hard to concentrate with the softly-kneading paw on her back, but Tracy did her best. She tried to remember what the mall really looked like in its derelict state. She focused on Payne's down below, trying to see past the dance studio to the empty store. And it sort of worked. The illusion didn't go away, but she thought she could almost see the edges of reality beneath it. Like an image projected over an uneven surface. "Wow..."

"Allright. So if you can do that, then maybe you can convince yourself there's no reason gravity should bother us anymore." With that, she turned and ran straight at the wall behind her. Her pawpads gripped it as easily as the floor, and she went sprinting straight up to the ceiling, then all the way across the inner curve of the skylight to the other side. Tracy's eyes popped. She could only dumbly applaud as Saffron came sauntering back along the walkway.

Tracy looked from the arch of the ceiling to the bottom level floor. "But what if you fell!? It's so far down!"

A shrug. "I'd be okay. It'd hurt, but I'd be okay. Same as you on your bike earlier. I mean, you already get it; you've just got to trust it completely."

That was true. 'No permanent damage,' Tracy reminded herself. She walked back towards the arcade, where at least there was carpet to fall on. She stared at the wall.

Saffron squoze her shoulder and whispered, "You're not gonna get it on your first try, or your second, or your hundredth. You've gotta have my tenacity. You've gotta do it without thinking."

'Without thinking? I can do that!' Tracy realized. "Is it cheating to use my music?" she asked.

"Why would it be?"

Saffron stayed beside Tracy the whole time while she tried and tried and tried to run up the wall. She even hushed Freddy and Kevin when they wanted to cheer her on. Saffron knew it took concentration to find the right groove. The right headspace. Tracy was giving it everything. No matter how many times the chipmunk slammed to the floor and landed on her butt, her shoulder, her ankle or even her face, she kept getting up and giving it another try. And to Saffron's amazement, she began to see improvement.



*~*~*~*



After a while Violet showed up. "Hello? I checked the whiteboard and it said Tracy'd be here." She didn't expect to find the chipmunk crashing into the floor from a vertical drop. Then she saw Saffron's 'get a load of this' grin and put two and two together.

Tracy wrenched herself up off the floor, aching all over. "I got four steps!" she croaked out when she saw Violet.

The flying squirrel helped her up. "You mean up the wall?"

"Uh huh! Only once. But I got three a few times! And that was after it felt like I couldn't even get more than one for the first zillion tries!" She dusted herself off. "Aww. I smeared up you guys's paintjob. I'm sorry."

Violet looked to Saffron. "We can do it again whenever you like."

Tracy grinned.

She said goodbye to the boys, who were cheating at pinball; having Kevin stand on top and tilt it by surfing. Then Saffron broke a few ribs with her parting hug, and damn near made Tracy melt by leaning in and whispering, "That was really impressive."

The little chipmunk was almost floating when Violet led her away. "Exhausted?" asked the flying squirrel. Tracy nodded. "Yeah, you get that way hanging out with her. I was thinking we'd try something a little quieter. Wanna see the roof?"

Tracy became very interested.

They had a relaxed, friendly race to the central fountain and its looming climbing tower. Tracy probably could have won if her bones didn't hurt so much. Plus Violet did a lovely glide off the escalators. When they both caught up at the marble ring, Tracy did a quick check of her corporeal self, then shyly asked what it was like to be a flying squirrel. Violet shrugged as if she'd been asked many times before. She said the biggest differences between her and the others were envy over the wider variety of clothing they got to wear, and having to be wary of pinching her folds in doors or chairs.

Bodily, the two of them were fairly similar (apart from the wings). Violet was a little taller, with a wider face and no stripes. Her fur was like coffee with cream, and Tracy's was more of a russet. Violet showed off the skull and crossbones that Cassie and Saffron had indeed decorated her back with. Noticing the thinness of Violet's garment, Tracy asked if she got really cold in the wintertime. "Nope," she said, "I'm always carrying a blanket," and enfolded a giggling chipmunk.

Before they started their climb, Violet made note of what routes were easier or more difficult. She said the tower wasn't anywhere near as precarious as it looked, since she and Tybalt had both been all up and down it reinforcing the joints. Tracy started to climb. It was definitely wet at first, having to swim past the moat and ascend the slippery crystal columns. Tracy took her shoes and socks off and tossed them down into the water. Not only did they feel gross soaked, but she thought she'd get a more reassuring grip climbing nonev-style. The two girls' paint got streaky from the water. They were giggling and playfully splashing each other when they made it to the place where the fountain ended and the tower began. "Sometimes I can make it here with a good strong jump off the popcorn stand. Not get wet at all," Violet said.

Tracy looked enviously at her wings. "Do you think I could manage it? Like, with a bedsheet tied on my arms and legs?"

"Freddy has tried," she said. "He is almost good at it."

Tracy didn't wanna guess how many broken beaks had gone into that 'almost'.

Violet was a very good climbing coach, talking with Tracy the whole time as they got higher and higher. Pointing out handholds and giving her encouragement. Definitely different from Saffron! And for a gigantic pile of junk, the tower felt quite sturdy. Tracy did feel a shiver in her gut whenever she glanced down, but all in all it wasn't too stressful an experience.

And when they got to the top, she had to take a moment to experience the pure awe. She could see everything from up here! All four sections of the mall were laid out below, and everything was tiny! Her body looked no bigger than a stocking stuffer. She could see Tybalt having a walk 'n talk with Nyl and waved to them. If she squinted one eye, she could make it look like they were stepping onto her palm. And when Violet challenged her to, she really was able to jump up and brush her fingers across the cold, thick glass of the ceiling.

But the flying squirrel hadn't brought her up here just to see more of the mall. She led Tracy along a 'branch' of the tower and leapt to one of the balcony-shaped lighting alcoves. Tracy steeled her heart and jumped too. Getting caught in Violet's soft wings was quite nice. And there was a secret hidden door up here. Violet abracadabra'd a key and they ascended a cramped and creaking staircase in pitch blackness. Then Violet swung open a hatch that seemed to lead directly into the milky way.

Tracy emerged gawking. The stars had never seemed so bright before! She hadn't even realized the sun had gone down, but the moon was out and nearly full, and the night winds were merciless. Violet wrapped Tracy up tight and they walked across the gravelly rooftop. Tracy could see all the way down to the freeway. The taillights looked like racing jellybeans.

They sat down right on the edge, which made Tracy's heartbeat flutter. Such a long way down to the street! Though thoughts of falling soon made way for a new worry. "Hey Violet... Are you guys, like, stuck in the mall? In ghost stories, the ghosts are usually doomed to haunt in a certain location forever. And would that mean...!" She blanched as a horrifying possibility arose.

Violet squoze her paw. "Shhh. We're not trapped. Though we are tied to Nyl. We can only go so far away from him before we start feeling weak and lightheaded. But we go outside all the time. We play hockey in the parking lot."

"Allright. Still..." Tracy looked down at her bare feet. The wind brushed her hair over her eyes. "That means, if I decide to stay, it'll mean choosing between you guys and running. I'd still be able to go around the block, but it wouldn't be the same. I like to run for hours. All different routes. It'd be hard to give that up."

"Then you should ask Nyl about it," Violet said consolingly. "His whole life is making us happier. Maybe he could make you a treadmill that looks and feels like you're running all over the world."

That eased Tracy's fears a little. If Nyl could bring a mall back to life, he could probably make a magic treadmill too.

Violet watched her expression, then smiled slyly, preparing to unleash a bit of a secret. "I'm sure things'll work out fine. Though if you're still having worries, you could always ask Nyl to eat them."

Tracy cocked her head. "Say that again?"

"He can eat bad feelings," Violet said quite clearly. "Or any kind of feelings. He manifests them, then slurps them right up. It's not like anything you've ever felt before. Very intimate."

Tracy blushed. Her mind was abuzz trying to imagine how he'd do it, and what emotions she might ask to be rid of if. But then something else occurred to her. Something that had been bothering her all this time about Violet's serene, perceptive smile. "Violet, is it okay if I ask you something personal?"

The squirrel's eyes twinkled yellow in the moonlight. She looked like she already knew the question. "Sure, I don't mind."

Tracy cringed a bit, not wanting to cause offense if she was wrong. "Are you... older, um, than some of the other kids here?"

A smirk. "I might be. Maybe even older than you think."

"Oh." She thought that was as much confirmation as she was likely to get right now.

The enigmatic squirrel let go of Tracy, but only so she could scoot herself forward and let her legs dangle off the side of the building. "Brr! Chilly on my toes!" She motioned for Tracy to join her, and was heartened when the chipmunk did.

Tracy looked down at her sneakers twenty feet above the sidewalk. She wrapped her arms tight around herself and shuddered, but didn't scoot back.

Violet approved, and rewarded her by enfolding her in warm fur again. "Tell you what," she said softly, "Ask me whatever you like. I'll keep some answers for myself, at least until I know you better. But I'll be honest about this right now: even though you chose us instead of Nyl choosing you, I already think you're a good fit."

"Thanks." Tracy leaned closer to rest her head on Violet's. Though just then her eyes popped open. "Wait! Tell me that you're real! That you and everyone else isn't just part of the illusion! Because if Nyl can make a mall and a treadmill, why couldn't he make a bunch of kids too!?"

Violet felt the little chipmunk's heartrate skyrocket. She laughed out loud. "Calm down, girl! I can't blame you for thinking that, but cross my heart it's not true. I guess I can't think of any way to prove it offhand, but do you really think he could keep up a puppet show like that all this time? Eight of us?"

"Allright, yeah, that would be hard." She remembered at breakfast, everyone all talking across the tables at one another.

Violet rubbed Tracy's back. "I think all of us have had that thought eventually. You're pretty smart to come up with it so quick. I did. Cassie did hard. Took us a week to coax her out of her room."

"Aw, that's sad." She could imagine the poor mouse curled up on her bed, refusing her friends' pleas because she couldn't be sure they were real.

Violet started massaging in a circular motion, then eventually added her other hand. Just to be nice, she eased Tracy into a nice, long, slow backrub. She felt her fellow rodent's tensions ease, and eventually more questions and answers came.

They talked for about an hour on the roof. By the end, even though Tracy hadn't gotten many concrete answers, she still felt she knew Violet a lot better. Whoever the squirrel had been before, she was a considerate and attentive friend now. And her fingers were very talented! Tracy's back felt like melted butter. It was only the increasing bite of the night breeze that persuaded her it was time to go back inside. She remembered she was going to hang out with Bonnie next.

"How 'bout I take you right to her room?" Violet offered.



*~*~*~*



A few minutes later, Bonnie was bursting through the beads to investigate the loud THUMP from outside. She didn't know what to make of the tangled, giggling pile of rodent fur on her doorstep.

Violet elbowed Tracy off of her. "Hey, I think I only broke five bones!" the squirrel teased.

The little skunk took this seriously for a moment, putting her paws up to her muzzle in concern. She looked from the two sciurids, to the top of the climbing tower, and made the connection. "Did you...!?"

Tracy beamed. "Uh huh! I rode her down like a flying carpet!"

Bonnie shook her head in an 'I could NEVER do that!' kind of way.

Violet stood and stretched, made sure she hadn't actually fractured anything, then gave Tracy one more blanket hug goodbye. She said she was going to grab some dinner at Poulo's. "Don't be late for the movie tonight!" she sang out as she jogged off.

Tracy smiled at her, then was pleasantly surprised by a little paw taking hold of hers. She looked down to see Bonnie's big blue peepers looking up at her. The skunkette was dressed in a night shirt so huge it might as well have been a muumuu. She looked like she wanted to speak, but couldn't overcome her shyness. Instead she just gave a tug indicating Tracy should follow her.

They headed further south, down to the lower level. Tracy could still faintly hear arcade games being played above. It was kind of spooky to be in a mall at night without the noisy crowds of shoppers. But of course, 'spooky' was a perfect adjective for tonight.

Tracy thought Bonnie was leading her to the toy store, but it turned out her destination was the spa instead. Mother Water was decorated in ivory white and earthtones with cobalt glass partitions, giving the impression of relaxing along a riverbank. "Is this allright?" Bonnie squeaked.

"Sure! I remember seeing this place the other day and wanting to check it out. What would you like to do first?"

Bonnie sparkled at being asked. She towed the chipmunk towards the massage chairs. Even with no masseuses on-site, the spa still had ways to soothe its customers. The chairs took cash, or at least they had until someone had corrected them with a hammer. Bonnie plugged them in and they started whirring. The girls both sat down and started murring.

"Ohhhhh, these are nice!" Tracy said. Mechanical hands rolled her, pummeled her, squoze her and vibrated her. There were even mechanisms in the seat that massaged her booty, which made her blush. The chairs were close enough together that there was soon a skunk paw cupped around hers. Tracy liked that too.

She thought back to seeing Bonnie and Eleanor kiss in the bookstore. Her heart fluttered a bit. She considered mentioning it, but thought that might be a bit too much embarrassment for Bonnie to take. What else to make conversation about? They'd hardly said a word since the chairs started kneading them. "Um... So tell me how you feel about Nyl?"

Bonnie's eyes had been serenely closed, but at that they popped open in shock. She started breathing hard and fast, unable to speak.

Tracy was startled to see such horror on the little skunk's face. She quickly reassured her with a paw squeeze. "Or not! It's okay!" She suddenly remembered something Violet had said. "I was just curious. But it's okay; you can tell me later if you want to, once you know me better."

Bonnie's expression changed completely, to relief.

Tracy smiled. "Sorry. I just wanted something to talk about. But we don't have to, I don't mind."

"I'd like that," Bonnie whispered. "And I do like you Tracy. It's just hard for me to, um..."

"Talk about stuff? It's allright. I like to be quiet sometimes too."

Bonnie's smile filled with gratitude for her understanding.

And so, for the rest of their time together in the spa, they passed hardly a dozen more words between them. And that was fine. Tracy's day so far had been wonderfully exciting, and as much as she wanted that to continue, she didn't anticipate how much she'd enjoy slowing down to take a break. The massage chairs made her jiggle until her muscles were jelly. And when their cycle ended, Bonnie pointed to the aqua-massagers. At first Tracy had thought they were tanning beds. But Bonnie wordlessly conveyed that when you laid down inside them, they'd close and cover your back with a sheet of rubbery plastic, then strong water jets would pound against it. Tracy wasn't sure how this thing could keep from getting her soaked, but was willing to give it a try. Soon both girls were settled inside their tubes. The lighting and plastic sheet turned everything teal. When the jets came on, Tracy yelped. It was cold! But the temperature warmed up soon enough, and even though the sensation was nothing like anything she'd felt before, she soon came to love the water pulsing tension away from her shoulders, spine, tush, and calves. Truth be told, it was also making her spread her legs and wish the water could reach a little lower.

Tracy eventually heard cute little snorty snores and gently knocked on Bonnie's tube. "I'm not sleeping!!" the skunk shouted. Tracy giggled, and Bonnie did too. To prevent herself from dropping off again, Bonnie suggested they try something else. Just from her expression, Tracy could tell it was something she really liked, but couldn't bring herself to say. By process of elimination, and noticing how red Bonnie's blush got when she pointed to it, Tracy deduced it was the mud bath.

There was a small circular pool in the back, brimming with oozy, delightful sludge. It looked like the jacuzzi in the mall fountain, Tracy thought, or a great big gravy bowl. She looked back and Bonnie was standing there paralyzed between desire and humiliation. Fidgeting like the pee dance. Tracy wondered if maybe some of her embarrassment came from her species. As in, 'Ha ha the stinky skunk wants to get in the stinky mud'. But neither of them were stinky. The mud's odor reminded Tracy of outside after a spring rain, and Bonnie just smelled like clean, warm fur. Tracy decided to take the lead. She stepped out of her footwear, then let her pajamas drop to the ground. She gave Bonnie a beckon with her tail as she stepped in.

Bonnie joined her so quickly it seemed like she was in the tub before her clothes even hit the ground.

Then there was a tensed-up, furiously blushing skunkette avoiding eye contact beside her. Tracy chuckled silently at her nervousness. Though yes, she was a bit nervous too. She was nude beside another girl, with nothing but warm, slimy mud between them. Tracy flexed her toes, feeling it squish delightfully. She laid back against the vinyl and let herself submerge up to her shoulders. And eventually, after a lot of hesitation, Bonnie sunk down too. Soon there were little toes tracing gently along her soles.

The girls relaxed so much in the lovely glorp that by the time half an hour had passed, only their eyes and noses were visible on the surface. It felt like being two strawberries in a bowl of hot oatmeal. Bonnie thought to open her eyes and check the time. She could juuust barely see the clock on the wall. She sat up. "Hey. Um. Tracy? We've been here a while. Didn't you wanna go do stuff with Eleanor now?"

Tracy thought of a wicked little joke she could insert there, but squashed it. "Allright. I kinda don't want to get up though. I kinda wanna live in this stuff." Bonnie giggled. "And how're we gonna get our fur cleaned off?" Tracy didn't like the thought of walking through the mall shivering and leaving wet footprints behind.

Bonnie made a, 'But wait!' gesture. She stood and slowly walked up the little steps to the mud bath's edge. As she did so, every last bit of the chocolate-brown muck slid off like oil on water. Her fur was dry and pristine.

"Cool!" Tracy said. Then she couldn't resist snickering at the fact that Bonnie was now proudly showing off her birthday suit

The skunk gave an 'EEP!' and practically dove into her nightshirt.



*~*~*~*



A few moments later, Tracy was very glad to see that Bonnie wasn't just going to slink back into her room after her latest embarrassment. Maybe it was because she was heading over to see Eleanor, but Tracy could hear little bare skunk feet padding along behind her on the echoing floor. Tracy checked her reflection in a beauty supply shop window: plenty of stars still sparkled in her fur and most of Saturn was still intact. She was impressed with all the fur paint had withstood so far. And the spa treatment left her feeling tingly and renewed.

Like with the arcade, she could hear PixelBusters before arriving there. The air was full of, "No no no!" and "Get THAT one!" and "Yessss!" The store's two demo consoles had been hooked up to a spectacularly big TV. The whole place was practically wallpapered in game cases. In the center, Eleanor and Freddy sat in a beanbag pit, vehemently mashing buttons while Kevin cheered them on. On the screen, they were playing as shrunken heroes fighting off animate foodstuffs and cockroaches on a kitchen floor.  There was a halo of spilled snacks surrounding everyone.

"Hi!"

"Tracy!" Eleanor boomed joyfully. She popped up and shut off the game.

Freddy 'NGAAH'ed. "I almost had the cheese!!"

Eleanor rolled her eyes. "We can get back there again whenever, beaver-butt."

The platypus sent half-kidding evil eyes at her.

Eleanor was bouncing on her toes to have Tracy join them. She scooped up the chipmunk's paws in hers. "You're here! Ohmigod, I felt like I was waiting for MONTHS! I've got SO MUCH to show you!" Her bubble burst slightly. "Um, how much of a gamer are you normally?"

Tracy winced. "I probly played more today at the arcade than in the whole last month. I've got a tile-matching game on my laptop?"

The giraffe looked like she was torn between anguish at having so much she'd need to explain, and elation at having so much she'd get to explain. "Okay... okay... Much as I can't wait for you to meet him, Baron Mind might be a bit much for a newbie. Plus it's a point-and-click and I doubt you've ever played one of those before." Tracy's blank look confirmed this. "Oh! I've got a great one to start with! It looks a little hardcore, but it's fun and easy, I promise." She jerked her thumb at the screen. "Not like this one. It looks all cutesy but it's actually BRUTALLY difficult!"

Tracy had much to learn, it seemed.

"First things first! MOAR SNACKS!" The energetic giraffe pulled Tracy with her into Sweet Thoughts next door, nearly bowling over Bonnie who was standing behind them. Elly gave Tracy a sack and commanded her to fill it with whatever she wanted. Tracy stuffed her sack while Eleanor gave Bonnie a squeeze and the skunk told her about their spa treatment. Tracy stuck mostly to chocolate and nuts, though couldn't resist the oddness of trying a gummy fried egg. It tasted indescribable.

Then she was plunked down in a beanbag and Eleanor searched the shelves. Discs were swapped. Tracy saw the title screen come up: Tachyon Sentry. She didn't even know what a tachyon was. Eleanor settled in beside her and began a mile-a-minute explanation. The giraffe was actually pretty good at putting things in simple terms, and Tracy realized she'd probably had to baptize some of the other kids into gaming. Plus she started them off in two-player mode and did most of the damage, which Tracy did not mind in the least. She'd never even held a controller before. (Tracy didn't actually have anything against video games though. They just never really interested her. They seemed so... stationary.)

Though this game was pretty fun once she got the hang of it. She and Eleanor’s characters both had guns that could shoot a bubble of slow time. Great for stopping enemy robots in their tracks to receive a good beating, but the challenge was to not get snuck up on from behind while you were whacking another with the spark rod. Eleanor said, "The game really starts once you get the upgrade that shoots fast time!" Tracy couldn't even imagine the potential offensive and cooperative uses for such a power.

Kevin left partway through their run to go mess with the projector, though he made sure to wish Tracy luck before he went. ("Try not to die!") Freddy split his time between giving pointers, discussing other games she might like with Eleanor, and doodling away on his own handheld device. Elly impressed Tracy with how many things she could concentrate on simultaneously: effortlessly dispatching drones and turrets while giving Tracy tips and noshing from her bag of candies. Tracy wondered how such a talky cub could be so close to nearly-mute Bonnie. Tracy sometimes glanced to the back of the store to see how the skunkette was doing. She was sitting on her own little chair, watching them, looking like a strange mixture of jealousy and pleasure, as if she was enjoying being jealous at the giraffe and chipmunk sitting so close. Tracy decided to mess with her a bit. She gave Eleanor a swift kiss on the cheek. Elly thought it was in thanks for her expert tutorship and huggled Tracy vigorously. Tracy glanced back to see that steam was practically shooting out of Bonnie's ears and she had a look in her eyes like, 'Oh geez! Do that again!' Tracy almost had a hard time concentrating on the robots after that.

Eleanor glanced at the clock. "Fast time's gonna have to wait for next time." Tracy was a bit disappointed. She was just beginning to get into it. But Eleanor said she wanted to at least show her one or two more games tonight. Tracy admitted she had no idea what she might like. "Well, what do you normally enjoy?" "Music and running," Tracy said with a shrug. Eleanor scratched her nubby horns. Then an absolutely brilliant grin spread over her face. She cannonballed across the room into her beanbag chair and used the console to get online. Through some magic Tracy didn't understand, soon she was bringing up a game without even putting a disc in. "Music and running, you say? Feast your eyes!" Tracy was dumbstruck by what Eleanor had found. It was BOTH! Eleanor chose a song, then began the game and let Tracy figure it out. Soon enough she realized the game was generating obstacles in the road that her little jogging avatar had to parkour over to the beat. She even recognized some of the tracks from her music player, and put on Slide Into You by IH8Homework next. "This is awesome!"

Eleanor could not have been more happy at seeing the pure delight shining in Tracy's eyes. "The best part of a hobby is infecting someone else with it," she said, and tickled Tracy a bit.

"Dooon't! I'll fall over a hedge!"

Tracy ran through five more songs. It definitely wasn't like real running; more like coaching the little character on screen. Tracy was rooting on the little lioness lady, as if each button press was a pat on the back. Plus Eleanor revealed that there was a choice of avatars. No chipmunks, but there was a squirrel who almost looked close.

While they still had a few minutes left, Eleanor went old-school and put Tracy into a simple platformer from the days when there were no curved edges. Tracy liked it well enough, though the other two games were more exciting.

She had just gotten the Cake Hammer when a bass chime echoed across the entire mall. Everyone else seemed to know what it meant immediately. They hopped up from their seats with excited smiles. "What's going on?" she asked. "Wait. Movie time, right?"

"You answered your own question!" Freddy said, and gave her an affectionate bonk on the head with his flat tail as he skedaddled out of the store.

"Grab your snacks!" Elly said as she shut the game down and clicked off the TV. "Didja have fun?"

"Yes!!" Tracy burst. "I admit, I wasn't sure at first, but I really did enjoy all the games you showed me! I guess you're gonna turn me into a big nerd too," she teased.

Eleanor grinned, and said ominously, "I haven't even showed you my anime DVDs."

"Oh no!" Tracy squeaked.

Bonnie said she wanted to get more food, but she'd join up with them soon. She gave them a tail-swish as she passed, and ran out giggling. The remaining two girls headed east, towards the giant movie screen.

Eleanor seemed like the furson to ask about this, Tracy thought. "Uh, I wasn't trying to be a snoop, but I saw you and Bonnie kiss earlier..."

"Oh so you DID see us?" Elly seemed quite proud actually.

"So, are you like, a couple?" Tracy asked. She tried to convey that she didn't mind, just that she was curious.

Eleanor shrugged. "'Couple' doesn't quite mean anything here."

"Huh?"

Smirking devilishly, the giraffe craned her neck close to whisper in Tracy's ear, "Everybody kisses everybody here. And sometimes we do even more stuff!"

A mini earthquake of confusion, excitement, apprehension, and lust rippled through Tracy's young body. "Everybody!?"

"Sure," Eleanor said casually. "And why not if it's fun? Hey! You two!"

Freddy and Kevin were discussing card games. They turned their heads.

"KISS!" Elly ordered.

With no hesitation, both boys grinned and mashed their mouths together. Moaning, they caressed each other all over in the sloppiest, most overacted smooch ever. Freddy pulled his beak from Kevin's lips with an audible 'pop'. "That good enough?"

Eleanor looked over to Tracy, and not a hair on her furry body wasn't standing straight up. Her eyes were as big as dinner plates. "Yeah, that was pretty good!"



*~*~*~*



Tracy was still reeling a bit as Eleanor helped her choose a good seat. No mere uncomfortable metal folding chairs did the cubs set up, but a full deployment of comfy recliners from Granger's. Enough for all, unless they wanted to stretch out on the air mattresses that had also been provided. As soon as Tracy sat, Cassie leapt into the seat beside her and asked all about what she'd done with the rest of her day.

Tracy did tell her, but also realized with puzzlement that she hadn't run into Cassie the entire time until now. "So what've you been doing?"

The tigermouse turned pink and fidgeted. "Um, secret stuff," she squeaked with a giggle.

Tracy thought she got the idea. Had she stumbled upon a secret hive of perverts? And would that really be so bad?

Tybalt had been indian wrestling with Saffron when he noticed Tracy's arrival. He let the leopardess knock him over, then skittered away while she was gloating. He waved to Tracy. "Hey! So, if you don't mind getting up again, we figured since you're the guest, you get to pick the movie."

"Really? Thanks!" Tybalt helped her up and she noticed his hands were like Eleanor's: small hooves for the first knuckle of each finger. "That reminds me." She turned back to Elly, blushing. "I know I shouldn't ask but... can I touch your horns?"

The giraffe rolled her eyes. "I should be offended by that, but nah. All you non-hoofers want to. Go ahead."

Tracy 'tee-hee'd and investigated them. "Oooh, they're fuzzier than I expected!"

"Wanna try my antlers?" Tybalt offered, leaning down.

Tracy felt them all over too. "They're velvety!"

Eleanor asked her, "So, do you mind if I squeeze that cute little tail? It's so exotic!"

Tracy turned scarlet, but how could she refuse? She giggled nervously at how alarming-yet-fun it felt to have someone fiddling with her tailfur.

Tybalt shook his booty at Eleanor. "Whose is fluffier?"

The giraffe soon had two handfuls of fur.

Still giggling afterwards, Tracy was a bit surprised when Tybalt led her over to the shoe store nearby. It was definitely the biggest one she'd ever seen. Aisles seemed to stretch for miles, and the cubs had been busy building shoebox castles with turrets and tunnels. But also, since this was the closest store to the projector, they'd scavenged the mall for every single DVD in the place, cramming them into the shelving units by the counter. Tracy almost went crosseyed. "I have to choose from all of THESE!?"

Ty shrugged. "It doesn't have to be the best movie ever. Just, whatever you'd like to see."

Tracy started perusing. She had nearly settled on a family comedy she thought everyone would like when an eavesdropping mousie piped up, "I've seeeen that one!"

Tybalt gave her a little shove. "Shoo! Let Tracy choose!"

Cassie snickered and skipped away.

Noticing Tracy was near the anime, Eleanor suggested, "See if they have Dekai Chinko Anterōpu no Rankoupaatii!"

"I can't read Japanese!" the chipmunk protested.

Eleanor grinned evilly.

Tracy went back to looking, but was soon distracted again by a lovely warm aroma. There was a commotion outside, and she turned towards the store windows to see Nyl riding up on a bicycle-mounted snack cart! The others clustered around him for hotdogs, popcorn and hugs. Tracy definitely wanted at least two out of those three, so she knew she'd better hurry up.

She'd known for a while now which film she most wanted, but had kept on looking to find something more crowd-pleasing. She turned to Tybalt for advice. "Is this one okay? I mean, it's kind of embarrassing. It's for little kids, I know, but I used to watch the cartoon all the time and when the movie came out I was like, 'I'm too old for that!', but I always did actually wanna see it, and I don't know if the others-"

Tybalt shushed her nervous babbling with a withering stare. "Tracy?"

"Um. Yes?"

"I said you could choose. Whatever you want. No one is going to mind."

Relief shivered through her. "Okay." Holding the case in both paws to her chest, she followed him out to the projector.

He glanced back over his shoulder. "Besides, I used to watch Super BMX Buffaloes too."

"Really!?"

A dashing grin. "Every Saturday."



*~*~*~*




Show time. Tracy was impressed with the intricacies of the homebrewed projector, which made Kevin purr. Nyl was dressed in a vendor's apron and it smelled buttery when she hugged him. She happily pigged out on wieners and nachos. It felt good to be surrounded by yummy smells and muffled friendly chatter. Popcorn got spilled everywhere, but no one cared because it would all be gone by tomorrow anyway. And when the movie started, Nyl waved his hand and made all of the lights in the mall turn off. Everything was dark except for the screen and the stars. Magical.

The movie itself was a lot of fun for everyone. Tracy had underestimated the show's popularity. Almost everyone sang or hummed along with the theme song.

Afterwards there was talk of a double feature, but a chorus of yawners defeated the motion. Each of the cubs suggested that Tracy could bunk with them for the night, but she knew exactly where she wanted to sleep.



*~*~*~*



"Nyl?"

A pair of orange eyes appeared in the darkness. "Yes?"

Tracy was a bit startled. With his dark fur, the fox seemed to materialize right out of the fog. But the brief shiver passed, replaced by a big happy grin. "Hi! D'you mind if we talk before bed?"

"Sure. But it doesn't have to be in this dreary place." He walked across the ash, leaving no footprints. "And you're back in your body?" He made a questioning 'erf' sound.

"Uh-huh." She'd traveled back to the fountain and slipped back inside before coming to meet him. She was pleasantly surprised at how easy it was, and also that she woke up to find herself still wearing the illusion of her pretty green pajamas.

"Any problems?" he asked with concern.

Tracy stretched her arms side to side. "I'm a bit achy, but it's not bad. Moving around's helping."

"No, I meant..." He came close and knelt to touch her cheek. "Is there anything wrong that made you go back to yourself like this? Do you want to leave?"

"Oh no!" she said immediately, and fell towards him in a hug. "I just thought, y'know, like you said about the circulation? That maybe I shouldn't let my body stay in one place all night?"

He patted her back. "I would've let you know if there was any danger."

"I know. Just being cautious."

"Smart girl," he said, and kissed her forehead.

Tracy closed her eyes and chittered.

"So what did you want to talk about?"

"Oh lotsa stuff." She tugged his arm, and it wasn't in the direction he expected. She pulled him deeper into the restroom, through the fog. He let her, but was puzzled.

Tracy paused for a moment when his true form became clear. The fungal spread of scar tissue throbbed across the floor and ceiling. She allowed herself a moment of unease, then shoved it out the door. This was Nyl. That was all that mattered. She walked carefully around the pulsing branches, right up to his anchored body. She looked up to where his face would have been if not buried in flesh. She gently brushed her fingers along his left wing.

Nyl shuddered.

"Can we talk here?" she asked.

"I... suppose so. It is easier to manifest like this closer to my real self." He flicked two plain chairs into existence and set them up side by side, facing away from the wall.

Tracy surprised him again by silently, assertively, turning the chairs so that they were facing one another, and allowing an unblocked view of the nerve cluster.

Nyl stumbled a bit on his words. "Tracy, you... I'm not ashamed of myself, if that's what you're thinking."

"I'm not. You said so already. But I also told you that I don't want to be afraid of you. Ever. I want this to not bother me. I want to show you that it doesn't bother me."

"Allright." He sat down in his chair with a humbled smile.

She sat down as well, their knees almost touching.

"Did you have fun today?" he asked.

Her grin told him everything before she even opened her mouth. And when she did, a flood of happy memories tumbled out. Nyl said he knew of some of it, as he was always generally aware of events in the mall (and a small radius outside) through a sense that was almost like touch, but via thought. She asked if he could feel everyone's footsteps on the floor. "Close enough." So Tracy filled him in on all the details that his 'radar' couldn't see.

By the end she was blushing at how much of it had been tinged with naughtiness. "...So I guess that's the big thing I wanted to ask you about. Is it true? Like what Eleanor said. That you guys, um, kiss and stuff. All the time."

Nyl chuckled reassuringly. "Well not all the time! But yes. I didn't bring it up myself because I thought it might seem 'creepy'. I figured it was better to let the others spill the beans. But there should be no shame in physical affection with someone you care about."

Tracy nodded agreement. "I've been noticing that. Like, it just feels nice to get a hug whenever I want one! And It made me realize how much I don't usually get them at home. There's not a lot of touch there."

"I'm sorry to hear that. Kids and angels alike are social creatures. We need contact, for our overall well-being."

Tracy fidgeted. "So like, what kinds of contact happen here?"

He gave her a sly smile. "Maybe it's better if I don't just tell you? Maybe you should ask the others and see?"

She blushed quite a bit, but was beginning to realize that blushing could be enjoyable. She remembered Eleanor kissing Bonnie. She wondered what it would be like to ask for a kiss from either of them. Or from Freddy and Kevin. Maybe both at once. Or Tybalt. Or Nyl... Not just a friendly peck on the cheek, but a real kiss.

Though a problem presented itself. "How do you guys keep from being jealous of each other?"

"That's a good question. We treat jealousy like a cold; something nasty to get rid of. It makes people sulk in silence when they ought to just ask for more attention if that's what they want. Sharing feels better if you can get past your emotions and relax in it."

At his mention of a certain word, Tracy remembered what Violet had said. "And can you... Can you make that emotion go away?"

The fox looked very surprised to be asked. "You're not just randomly guessing that, are you? Someone told you." He looked mildly annoyed, but mostly worried. "That was something else I wanted to ease you into knowing about. It made some of the other cubs uncomfortable at first."

"Me too, a little," Tracy admitted. "But I trust you. So I'd rather ask about it than just be worried."

He smiled proudly at her for that and patted her paw. "Good girl."

She turned her paw to take hold of his, and traced her fingertips along his palm.

Nyl looked up to the ceiling to collect his thoughts. The nerves in his corporeal body were pulsing slightly faster, though Tracy didn't notice. "Let's see then. You already know that I get nutrition from souls, and you definitely seemed allright with that when I told you."

A nod. "I got a little bit swept up in the moment then, but yeah. I'm still okay with it."

He was glad to hear it. "Sorry if I seem so reluctant about this. Again, this used to be much harder, and there's nothing I want less than to scare my chosen cubs. But it's true I can also feed on emotions. Before you ask, it's not permanent. You'll still feel them again, just not for the rest of the day. Maybe a few days depending on how much you let me drink."

The comparison to a vampire returned to Tracy's mind. "And it's not, like, ALL emotions, right? So I'd be just a blank cardboard zombie afterwards?"

"Well, not unless you wanted that," he kidded. "I can choose exactly which one to take, and you could help by feeling it strongly and guiding me to it. It's fear, usually. Or sadness, or rage, or heartbreak. Or like we said, jealousy. There's been times when our family couldn't get along, so the cubs at the center of it came to me and I helped them. So they could deal with the problem with clearer heads. Emotions can be helpful, but sometimes they can take over when we don't want them to."

Tracy nodded. "And you can make that stop? How does it work?"

"I would lean in close," he said softly, and he did. "And place my paws on your cheeks." And he did. "When you were ready, you would concentrate on the feeling, and I would help you bring it closer. Then I would pull."

Tracy was trembling. "C-could you show me?" she whispered.

"What do you want to get rid of?" he asked, slow and gentle.

Truth be told, there wasn't anything weighing terribly upon her at the moment. But she could remember times when there had been. Times when she was so angry she wanted to punch walls, or so sad she wanted to crawl in bed and never wake up. But she didn't feel either of those things right now. Actually, the closest she could think of was the one they'd just been talking about. During the movie, she'd seen Tybalt sitting with Cassie on one of the air mattresses. Sitting pretty close. And when he'd put his arm around her, Tracy had felt a flare of anger-soured envy. It was an ugly feeling. She didn't want to hate Tybalt or Cassie. So even if the feeling had been small, she still wanted it gone. "Can you get rid of my jealousy?" she asked Nyl.

"Easily," he said. "Just bring it to the front of your mind. Let me get a hold of it."

It was hard to focus on something she wanted to let go of, but she tried. Nyl's eyes came closer and closer to hers until they seemed to fill existence. That endless, powerful orange, surrounded by glossy, soft darkness. Their noses touched. She could feel his breath on her lips. His hands were on both sides of her face exerting gentle pressure. His fingers spread her eyelids with the absolute minimum amount of pressure necessary. Tracy was letting herself fall into a complete unknown here, and it was exhilarating as well as frightening. It was hard not to let fear be her forefront emotion.

But she did her best to focus on Tybalt and Cassie. The deerboy's arm around the mouse's shoulder. Wishing that was her. Being angry at him for not choosing her instead. Wanting Cassie out of the picture. Awful, crawly feelings that her new wonderful friends did not deserve. Selfish feelings. Why should Ty just drop everything to be with her? Maybe he and Cassie were dating. Maybe he flirted with everyone, and he'd be glad to put his arm around Tracy too. The dark feelings started swirling with the bright ones, and Tracy suddenly understood why Bonnie might have enjoyed seeing her sitting by Eleanor. Maybe instead of jealousy, you could feel excited and happy to see someone you loved enjoying someone new?

Tracy was not sure if these were her own realizations or if Nyl was helping to take the jealousy away already. But then when he started, she knew. There was no doubt.

The angel held his mouth open and inhaled. Tracy froze solid. Her eyes shot open, almost painfully wide. She felt like she needed to cry, urgently. But it wasn't tears that came out. Silvery strings of pure emotion emerged from her eyes. They glowed. They were wispy, like spider threads. As Nyl drew in a long, deep breath, the silver strands traveled across the space between their eyes, and were absorbed into his. As it happened, Tracy felt a pulling down deep in her being. Not her physical body, but in the essence of what she was. Her very core. Something dipped a finger in and removed something. Not much. Barely a scoop. It felt simultaneously like a violation of something sacred, and like the most profound release of tension she had ever felt.

When it ended and the wispy strands disappeared fully into Nylsearis' eyes, he took his hands away from the trusting little chipmunk's face and let her recover.

Her eyes stayed open. Her heart was pounding and her breath was fast. It felt exactly like the time she'd thought she'd looked both ways and hadn't, and had stepped out into traffic three feet from an onrushing car. She'd jerked herself back onto the sidewalk in time, but the intensity of horror and relief she felt afterwards had left her shaken for several minutes. That was what she felt like now.

"I only took a very small amount," Nyl said. "I didn't want to overwhelm you."

Tracy wanted to snark 'that's an understatement', but she couldn't manage speech yet. She forced her hands to let go of the chair seat.

"Are you allright? I know it was intense. I've been told that a lot."

No lone word could ever do it justice, but 'intense' was close enough for a start. Tracy took a deep breath and shuddered. "It was terrifying. But it was powerful too. I liked it. I almost wanted you to take more. Just take everything if I could keep feeling... whatever that was."

He nodded in understanding. "I am very careful with it. It's the kind of sensation that could become addictive if I'm not. So far that's never happened. I never take more than I'm asked to."

She nodded, trusting his word on that. "Is that what it'd feel like if you took my soul?"

"Not at all, oddly enough," he chuckled. "With souls, I can just absorb the energy that naturally radiates from them. It's like sunbathing, actually. You don't have to pull energy out of a sunbeam. But with emotions, I do have to get in there and tug, so it's a much different experience. In fact, I'm even getting a little bit of energy from just sitting across from you now."

Tracy rather liked that. She smiled, picturing the charming idea of her as a tiny sun, burning brightly enough to warm him.

"Do you feel jealous anymore?" he asked.

Tracy looked inside herself to check. When her mind's eye saw Tybalt's arm around Cassie's shoulder again, she was allright with it. It wasn't like anything felt missing from her. No alarming hole in her heart. As she looked at the mental image, her reaction could be summed up as, 'Good for them.' Though it also occurred to her that the deer boy had another arm to curl around two sets of shoulders with...

Nyl was very happy to see her pleased with the result. "Anything else I can answer?"

"Oh geez, lots!" Tracy tried to remember all the questions that had been floating through her mind during the movie, though it was a little hard to recall them past her current fluttery feelings. "Could you maybe tell me what's the deal between you and Bonnie?"

He gave her a 'tsk tsk' look. "I would never break a confidence. That's for her to tell you when she's ready. It might take some time, since she's not a skunk with a lot of self confidence. But that's something I'm helping her with, and that's part of your answer right there."

Tracy nodded. That made sense.

"Also," Nyl said with a sly smile, "the reason she likes for me to make her call me 'Master Nyl' is very similar to why you liked Saffron calling you a slowpoke."

Tracy got beet red for a moment. "Oh. OH! Okay, allright, I think I can understand that." She could not help a grin at the memory.

There was something else she wanted to ask about, but didn't want to make him break a secret. "I was also curious if any of the kids here, maybe, aren't cubs anymore? Technically? You don't have to say who."

He gave her a 'nice try' smirk. "I will say yes, but again, those are details you'll need to earn. I can at least say where most of them came from."

Tracy leaned in.

Nyl spread his hands around the room. "I've been in this mall since before it was built. I've had followers for a very long time before that, but most of them are safe inside and dreaming now." He patted his belly. "I chose here because it was becoming difficult to move around. Why not have people come to me? I spent my days just meditating, 'listening' to all the customers and employees who came through. When I sensed someone who had something they needed to get away from, I'd find a way to ask them if they'd like to come stay with me instead."

"So that's why I was different," Tracy said. "I just showed up. But all the others, you picked them out specifically."

He nodded. "Don't think you're any less special though. In fact, part of why I've been cautious with you is that I don't want to be greedy. When I first sensed you, you felt like such a perfect match I honestly couldn't believe the luck. I thought I was just overeager, what with us being all by ourselves here for so long."

"I felt that too," Tracy said. "Like it was too good to be true."

He reached out to run his fingers through her fluffy headfur. "Sometimes good things are true. Though... and you may not like this part... if you are serious about joining us here, I'm going to have to make you wait a short while."

She wrinkled her nose. "Why?"

"I read in a book once that two weeks was a fair length of time to see if roommates are a good match for each other. With some of the others, I had to take them right away. Your situation is unhappy, but not urgent. So I'd like to see how well you interact with everyone once the 'newness' wears off."

Her ears drooped. "I think I know what you mean. Sometimes I'll get a gift and I'm really excited about it for a few days, but then the magic just 'poof's away."

"I don't think that will happen here. But I'd just like to be sure." He was glad that got her smile back. "Plus, I want to make sure you have time to think about it. You would be leaving your family. Permanently. You need to really consider everything that's going to mean for you, and for them."

Tracy nodded solemnly. It was, in fact, something she thought she had decided already, but now wasn't so sure about. "The other kids... you said some of them had urgent situations?"

"Some, yes," he said sadly. "I don't think Tybalt will mind me saying that he was one of those cases. I'm not sure he would have survived if I hadn't given him sanctuary. Eleanor either."

Tracy's eyebrows went way up."Geez! Should I ask them about it?"

"If you want to. Both of them have made amazing progress. I think they'll be very open about it. Other cubs I've known, not so much. We all heal in different ways, at different paces." Sensing that the conversation was going to a rather bleak place, he tried to lighten it up with a small laugh. "Heh. You want to know why this mall closed down?"

She was about to ask, but then felt the 'click' of a lot of pieces falling into place. "Wait, let me guess! So many kids went missing because you kept rescuing them, that people started thinking the place was haunted!"

That got a much bigger laugh. "Close enough! Some of them did. Some people thought there was a serial child abductor in the area, which was true in a way. Or they suspected gangs of satanists, snatching up cubs for sinister rituals. Whatever the reason, parents stopped bringing their kids here, and wouldn't let their teens come alone. Without kids and teens, a mall goes broke."

Tracy chuckled. "Aw. I'm glad you helped so many kids, but I bet a lot of people were really bummed about the mall closing. People probably lost their jobs."

Nyl nodded. "A lot of people did. I live with that guilt. But there's always consequences to our actions, and I think mine balanced out for the best overall. Sometimes it's justifiable to inconvenience many, if you save a few from their nightmares."

Tracy smiled in agreement. She looked up at his tortured form splayed on the wall, and remembered something he'd said earlier. "Can you move at all anymore?"

He shrugged. "Some," he answered simply.

"But what if something happens to this building? What if they tear it down, or build something else?"

"Then I'll think of something," he reassured. "I'm not worried. I've gotten very good at my illusions while I've been here. I've surpassed what I ever thought I'd be capable of. Maybe if it came to that, I could convince the whole construction crew to just build around me."

He chuckled, but noticed Tracy hadn't. She was still looking up at the tangled knot that had once been his face.

"Tracy?"

Her gaze didn't falter. "Can you hold me?" she asked in a very small voice. "I mean, in your real arms?"

He was taken aback by the request. "I suppose. If that's what you want..."

A nod.

He stood up and took her hand. When she was on her feet, he made the chairs go away. Tracy was still looking up in fascination at his other body. Nyl lifted her up into his illusion's arms, and felt her flinch in surprise when his corporeal arms moved. As slow as stone grinding on stone, they outstretched to accept her. The nerves pulled reluctantly away from the wall like roots from soil. Nyl placed an arm below Tracy's legs and elevated her into his embrace.

She did her best to keep still. This did not look easy for him, and she worried that she'd asked too much. She also wasn't entirely sure of why she wanted this. Those squirming nerves were repulsive to her sight. And she grimaced in disgust when she felt them take her weight. But they were something she couldn't look away from either. Knowing his mind was buried inside there. This 'monster' was where his gentle voice came from. Her paw rubbed along his shoulder. The meat was like ropy tree bark. Like living jerky. It was rough and bumpy and gnarled and mottled, but also alive and warm. There was a heartbeat in it. She could feel it thump-thump in every part of him. Like the beat of a song. It was soothing.

She turned back for a moment to Nyl's other face. Coffee-dark fur with orange tufts, and eyes as inviting and warm as a toasty fireplace in winter. "Is this what you used to look like? Before?"

"More or less," he said with a shrug. "I added a few artistic touches. Not many."

She looked back to his real face. A red sphere of twine. She brushed her paw lightly across it, then looked back. "Can you feel that?"

She saw him shiver. "Yes, Tracy. Thank you."

She turned back again. Looked at his true face until she was sure it no longer bothered her. It was not a normal sight, yet it was no different than when someone was born deformed, or disfigured in an accident. It wasn't their fault. And their heart mattered most. "Would it be allright if I slept here tonight?" she asked.

Nyl's illusion stepped closer and kissed behind her ear. "I'd like that very much," he said.

Then the illusion vanished. Tracy was alone in the ruined restroom with the silent, mummified remains of a living angel. The arms that were holding her up began to change. She looked around to see what they were doing, but didn't move or flee. The nerves writhed and uncoiled, changing from a pair of arms into something closer to a cradle. They wove themselves into a cocoon for her. Tracy gasped as she felt his warmth and heartbeat enfolding her from feet to neck. The nerves wound tight and pulled her closer, making a little nest for her to fall asleep in.

When they settled down, Tracy was completely enveloped. Only her face peeked out, like she was a papoose, or living in a tiny igloo. There was a small bit of claustrophobia, but mostly she felt secure. It didn't feel like she was being held up anymore, so much as he had changed his statue-like body around her. His body felt relaxed now. He had set this up to be comfortable for both of them. He could hold her here all night long.

'I wish it was longer,' Tracy thought to herself.

She closed her eyes and rested her cheek against his pebbly shoulder.

His heartbeat rocked her to sleep.



*~*~*~*





PART THREE

*~*~*~*

The next two weeks flew by in a blur. So many fun memories, Tracy couldn't keep track of which day they'd happened on. Devouring new music in the CD shop. Trying out the turbocharged, boneshaking kiddie rides by the west exit. Bobsledding down the escalators on vending machines with Freddy. Beating Tachyon Shift with Eleanor. Making a campfire with Tybalt right there in the sporting goods department. Saffron catching her fall after she'd finally managed to get six steps vertically. Discorporating in the jacuzzi one day to find her own face looking back at her; Kevin having pulled off a perfect impersonation. Violet teaching her how to make spaghetti and meatballs in the kitchen at Poulo's. Trying out Cassie's stripes for a day while the mouse painted herself up into a chipmunk. Reading quietly with Bonnie in the bookstore; having the little skunk open up to her bit by bit. And touring around the mall with the others as they discussed which space might become her bedroom someday soon.

Then there were the naughty memories, and those were increasing in frequency. There had been the breakfast after her sleepover, when she'd shyly told her new friends about a dream she had where they all lined up and let her kiss every one of them. They had eagerly agreed to make it real. An awesome combination of jittery blushing and firecracker pleasure filled Tracy's tummy as she tried out each pair of lips (and one beak). There had been the time when Nyl had taught her about safewords, and how they could be applied to more situations than just sexy ones. The others taught Tracy all of theirs, and the word Tracy chose was Vandyke, her home street. There was the night of her second sleepover, when she had been invited to Tybalt's tent. She got to touch more than his antlers before they fell asleep. There was the time when Saffron had become overwhelmed by their shared sweaty musk playing Dance Til You Die and pounced the little chipmunk right onto the floor for some tickling and nibbles. There was the time Bonnie had stutteringly confessed that sometimes she felt like such a bad little skunky, she had to ask Master Nyl if he could please give her a spanking. Tracy could not help picturing herself asking Master Nyl for the same thing, or maybe giving Bonnie a hand herself if he was busy. There was the time she'd been bold enough to bike a few laps around the east and west sections wearing nothing but her shoes and socks. She also remembered hearing murmurs from the lower level restrooms one day, and peeking in to catch a glimpse of Eleanor enfolded in Nyl's body the way she had been that first night. It had not occurred to Tracy that other cubs might have made the same request. Whether her jealousy was still gone or not, she felt only happiness for Elly as she skittered away and left the two of them to their pleasure.

That was something else she had noticed. There were times when she'd go to see Nyl, and would find him sharing time with another cub. At first she had been disappointed, until a new way of looking at it occurred to her. He wasn't just ignoring the others because a new cub had come around. They were still his family, and he made time for all of them. Realizing that had filled her with a kind of contented joy. This was how love was supposed to be.

Other secrets came to light. As Tracy spent more and more time at the mall, the other cubs began to share their stories. Some were nice. They had discussed over brunch the fact that this current group was not the full total of Nyl's followers. There were many more who chose to stay inside him, snoozing peacefully and being digested. Others rotated in and out as they felt like. Cassie had given Nyl's tummy a rub. "My brother's in there!" she said proudly. The others told her lots of stories about other cubs who were 'on vacation'. Tracy hoped she'd get to meet them all some day.

Other stories were much more difficult to share, and to hear. Tybalt told about having to run the whole house by himself while his neglectful parents progressed further into abuse and alcoholism. Eleanor told about how she had been driven to death's door by an illness and a family that did not believe in treating it with 'scientific medicine'. They had all left behind similar miseries to find happiness with Nyl. Tracy listened and remembered everything, and shared lots of comfort hugs afterwards. One night in the arcade, she and Saffron had been taking a break from wall practice. They were sitting side by side, when the leopardess had pulled her close and made her swear to secrecy about how her grandmother had used to beat her with anything she could grab hold of, and how her family refused to believe it and made her keep visiting the old gargoyle. Tracy promised she would never tell.

And all the while, Tracy became more keenly aware of her own home life. Things which had once merely irritated her now became nearly unbearable. She finally had the full understanding that families like hers were not normal. Dad in a robotic daze; living out the same actions day in and day out, referring all problems back to Mom. The twins were kept so busy being shown off to the other parents in town, they had no time to develop their own personalities. And Mom kept everything Just So, running the family like a movie director. Everything had to look right, and it was of no importance that none of it was right.

Tracy knew things were speeding towards a change. Not only was she seeing a different side of her family, but they had noticed how much time she'd been spending "running" lately. They were starting to get suspicious, and Tracy was running out of lies. She could hardly stand to eat meals with them anymore. Mom's death glare felt like a heat laser burning holes in her back whenever she'd rush home and head straight up the stairs to her room. The house became a pressure cooker.

Tracy could not have been more ready when, on the afternoon of her seventh visit, Nyl had asked if she'd like to begin her devotions.



*~*~*~*



"Now, you understand that this isn't completely serious, right?"

Tracy was sitting on the marble ring around the fountain, looking up while Nyl explained. The other cubs were sprinkled about, watching. Violet and Cassie had a box seat in the climbing tower. Tracy relaxed slightly, but there was still a flutter in her belly. "Actually, I didn't," she told Nyl.

He caressed her cheek to apologize for any needless worry. "They were supposed to be a surprise." He shot a look at Cassie, who put both paws over her mouth. "Originally I thought them up to make cubs reconsider. A long time ago, I was still wracked with pain over whether it was right to feed off others, even if they agreed to it. I tried to make my followers go away so I wouldn't have to face that guilt."

She squoze his paw.

"But over the years I got better," he said with a smile. "And weirdly enough, the devotions stayed on. I don't even remember where the name came from. Cubs seemed to like them, actually. So they became, I suppose, like an initiation ritual. And they aren't a deal breaker. I won't cast you out forever if you fail. They're just, something you can choose to try."

"But what are they?" Tracy whined, fidgeting.

He chuckled. Then he knelt down to eye level with her, fixing her with a gaze of playful seriousness. "They're a test of your devotion to me, little one. How much are you committed to taking your place with us? Will you fight to be here? Will you willingly endure suffering, simply because I ask it of you?"

Tracy's arms were shaking. She couldn't look away from Nyl's hypnotic eyes. The mention of fighting and suffering scared her, but there was also a part of her (that she thought Saffron would approve of) that wanted him to test her with any challenge he could conjure. She wanted to prove herself to him. To show how much this meant to her. That she was willing to do anything to change her life.

"I will," Tracy said, quiet but resolute.

"Good girl," he said back, and traced a fingertip down the bridge of her nose, giving it a 'boop' at the end. "So then, kiddo. Let's get you back in your body and I'll show you exactly what you're in for."

Tracy turned around towards her snoozing self. "Back in...? But...?"

At this, the other cubs all got up and came closer to give her hugs and back-pats. They all had eager, knowing grins.

"You won't be able to see us, but we'll be watching and cheering you on," Tybalt said.

"Good luck!" Cassie whispered to her from behind, then kissed her ear.

"You might even like them," Eleanor said with a naughty wink, and Bonnie nodded.

Tracy made sure to hug each and every one of them, then reluctantly stepped into the hot tub. She was facing the unknown. She'd thought this would be something she'd be going through alongside them. Maybe she'd have to eat a scorpion, or face a pillow-whacking gauntlet. She absolutely hadn't expected it to involve her physical body. She dipped a leg into her chest, let herself slip inside, then opened her eyes.

She was back in the real mall, alone except for Nyl, looking at the empty concourses and the cracks in the walls. Back in her own fur and winter jacket. (She had realized days later that she'd never actually needed to get undressed that first day. Nyl admitted with a chagrined smile that it had been a test of her inhibitions, and she'd passed beautifully. She wanted to be upset at him for such a naughty trick, but just couldn't.)

Nyl helped her stand up. "How's the 'fuzziness' this time?"

She wiggled various parts of herself, getting her blood back to normal pumping. "Not bad at all. I hardly feel it anymore."

"Are you ready to start?"

She looked into his eyes, saw no malice there, nothing but love and care, and said yes.

Nyl directed her to sit back down on the marble ring. He sat beside her, and turned her to face him, locking eyes with her. He held her paws up and wrapped his hands around them. "I am going to change you," he said.

Tracy shivered. "Like Kevin?"

A laugh. "No, not like Kevin. I choose different challenges for each new cub, and I have three in mind for you. The first, today. The second, whenever you're ready to accept it. And so on. But I told you I can do more than just make illusions. I can change physical matter too. Tracy, will you give me permission to change yours?"

Heart thumping, she nodded.

"Good. Now relax." He held her paws tight, and began to inhale.

As a strange pull began to tug at her insides, Tracy thought at first he was going to take one of her emotions away. But it was not quite the same feeling. Similar, but distinctly new. This wasn't taking away from her essence, but her body. She didn't know how and could not speak to ask. Particles of her began to waft away from her form, inhaled by Nyl's divine breath. A steady stream of Tracy-dust. All she could see was his eyes. She did not know what he was taking away, but that orange gaze said to trust him and let it continue. She did. Whatever he was doing to her, she allowed it. The loss felt tingly. Little carbonated bubbles popping all along her face and tummy. Sand trickling through her fur.

Nyl steadily drew in breath until he had sculpted her just the way he wanted. He let go of her hands. "Take a look," he said.

Still captivated, Tracy felt all around her face and torso. Something was wrong, yet nothing felt missing. Though when she bent over to look down at herself, she knew what it was immediately. Her head weighed almost nothing! She grabbed it and felt the thud of her paws echo inside. She patted herself all over. "I'm hollow!!"

He giggled. "Very perceptive."

Tracy tried to stand up, but her center of gravity was completely screwy. Her limbs still weighed the same; she could pinch and feel the muscle in them. But she had no more heartbeat, wasn't breathing, and when she pressed on her belly, her paw sunk inwards all the way back to her spine. "My guts are gone!" Alarms started going off in her mind. Dreading what she thought might happen, she opened her mouth wide and felt around with her fingers. There was her tongue, and her teeth, but when she probed further, absolutely nothing. She reached in deeper. Her sleeve bunched up past her wrist. Her fingers touched bone, and she realized she was touching the inside of her own skull. There was nothing inside it now but air.

Nyl was rapt in amusement at her reaction. "How does it feel?"

Tracy poked gingerly around inside her dome until she felt a squish. She had encountered her own eyeball. Oh that was TOO gross! She shrieked and pulled her arm out. "YUCK! How the HECK did you do this to me!?"

He rolled his eyes. "Trade secret."

Tracy tried standing up again. The hollowness was severely messing with her balance. Each of her legs weighed more than her torso! And she was literally an airhead!

Nyl watched her take a few wobbly steps. "Difficult, is it? I imagine so. Especially considering you have to spend the next twenty-four hours like that."

She spun around in shock. "WHAT!?" This unbalanced her and she fell forwards, to be caught in Nyl's arms.

"Are you devoted or not?" he asked with a grin.

She turned pink. "Well, yes, but..."

"Did you think I'd make it easy on you? Did you think it would be simple? Until now, the mall has been your secret world, never intertwining with your normal life. The devotions always revolve around how well you can keep a secret. Or will you? It's entirely up to you to decide. But you're not changing back until tomorrow at this same time. So, have fun with it." He nuzzled noses with her.

A whole day like this! How was she going to hide it from her parents? How was she going to hide it at school? How was she even going to be able to run home!? "You're meeeean," she told Nyl.

"Yup," he agreed.

Bracing herself against his shoulder, she managed to stand up again. She poked her bellybutton and watched it invert to swallow her whole hand. "But... How am I alive like this!?"

"Life is pretty easy for someone like me to manipulate. I know how it works. I could fold you up like origami, then smooth you out again, good as new. It's difficult to explain exactly how, but right now your body thinks everything's functioning normally, and I promise you'll be fine." He ran his paws along her sides, making her wiggle. "And if you run into a situation where you'll absolutely be caught, like if you're taken to a doctor's appointment, you can bring yourself back to normal by thinking your safeword as hard as you can. Do you remember it?"

She nodded, but didn't say it, not wanting to undo the change by accident. It gave her some relief to know she had an out like that. A safety release. Though she'd only get one, and it would mean failing the challenge. She'd have to make sure not to use it at the first sign of embarrassment.

He patted her tush to send her off towards the exit. "I think you'll do fine. I cut your visit short today because I knew you'd have some difficulty getting home. Take it slow at first."

"Allright. I do have a few downtempo songs on my player." She popped her earbuds in, then couldn't resist backing up to feel his soft paw touch her hiney again.

"Naughty little chipmunk," he whispered to her, and gave her a kiss. "See you tomorrow."

"See you tomorrow," she echoed, and headed towards Payne's.

She got eighteen steps before falling onto her face.

"Tracy!!"

"I'm fine!"



*~*~*~*



It did not take too terribly long for her to find a running groove again. She was very careful to stick to level sidewalks, not wanting to risk another faceplant. She was also glad there wasn't much wind today; even the mild breezes were buffeting her balloony body back and forth. And she was cold! She was really going to have to hustle it home. Her jacket insulated her, but there was nothing inside to retain heat but a great big wad of air.

At home the twins were throwing a fit over whether they wanted pizza or chicken for dinner. Tracy was rather glad for the ruckus, as it gave her an easy excuse to flee upstairs. "I've got a headache, Mom. I can't take this. I'll come down and eat something later." Mom was suspicious, as she always was these days, but allowed her to pass. It was hard enough dealing with the two screaming ones without adding in the sullen one too.

Tracy locked her bedroom door behind her. What a relief! She was home and safely out of sight. She wouldn't have to try to fake eating dinner in front of them. She wasn't even sure if she could eat like this. First things first, she littered her floor with clothes and stood in front of her mirror undressed.

She turned to and fro. Even though she could absolutely feel her excavated-ness, it didn't show on the outside. There was still a layer of muscle beneath her skin, and she guessed her skull and ribcage were keeping her from going all floppy.

Gawking at the impossibility, she reached a hand all the way down her throat. Aside from her wet tongue, it was mostly dry inside. Like touching the roof of her mouth. When her fingers brushed the inside of her labia, the tingle blasted through her like a shot. She yanked her arm out and looked at herself, not daring to believe she had such a naughty possibility to explore. 'No, that's just... too weird,' she decided, but it felt like her body might change her mind soon.

She leaned closer to the mirror and opened her mouth as wide as possible. She could see all the way to the back of her head. It felt bizarre to be thinking without brains. She shone her desk lamp into her mouth and could see the glow leaking from the corners of her eyes! Tracy had to go lie down for a moment after that.

It took a few hours to wrap her mind around the strangeness of it all, but eventually her natural curiosity wanted to experiment. She'd always kept a small stash of snacks in her room for homework nibbling. She tried eating a pecan, and after chewing, felt it splat against her perineum. "Eww!" She reached inside with a tissue to clean it out. She swallowed a few more nuts and felt them bounce around inside. When she sat up and wiggled her booty, they shook like a maraca. Then one of them fell out of her cunny. Instant blush. 'Oh right. I was gonna do more stuff with that, wasn't I?'

Making absolutely sure her door was still locked, Tracy spent the next hour or so putting things in and taking them out of various holes. She was able to slide her whole pencil case up into her vagina, then push it out again from the inside. And she didn't just have to reach in through her mouth. Taking it slow at first, she was able to wriggle her whole hand in through the front entrance and the back. She even tried it with both holes at once and gave herself a handshake in the middle. Soon all sorts of things were going up there. Her music player echoed awesomely inside her when she put it on speaker mode. Her pretty golden ornament sunk in with a 'pop'. One of her old 12 inch fashion dolls was no challenge, and she could even fit six big plushies inside at once. Then she tried two more inside her head as well. It felt equally silly and sexy to be devouring her soft pals like this.

In fact, it felt so good, she decided to leave them inside for a while. She did her homework while stuffed full of plush, and even fell asleep that way. In the morning it took her a few moments to figure out why she felt so weird. Then followed an incredibly intense session of pulling eight wrinkled-but-okay stuffed animals out of her various exits.

At breakfast she grabbed a protein bar and pretended to chew it, actually just biting it into chunks which she could let fall out of her pants leg on the way to the bus stop. School was a bit of a nightmare. Every class felt like she was in imminent danger of discovery. She kept her mouth closed as much as possible. When Mrs. Spang did call on her, she mumbled so much she was asked to repeat her answer three times.

Disaster struck at lunch. Tracy took her tray and sat by herself. Fish sandwich and fries: good. Those were dry enough to 'fake chew' and ingest without much mess. But then Courtney and Marissa sat down next to her, and soon she was drawn into conversation about that one movie out now where you could totally see Keith Trudale's whole butt. Tracy followed along, nodding, aware the entire time of the little pile of fish and potato chunks accumulating in her bottom, hoping it'd all stay in when she stood up. And then without thinking, she took a great big swig of soda. Her eyes went wide as she felt it drain right out of her, all over the seat of her pants. And she'd been so careful to fake her sips up to that point! There was only one thing to do. She faked reaching over to sample Courtney's ketchup and 'accidentally' knocked the whole can of soda into her lap with an appropriate 'Eek!'. Her two friends offered to escort her to the washroom and help her out, but she said she could handle it by herself and skedaddled. She left a few wads of soggy fry behind in the hallway as she ran, but thankfully no one saw it. Tracy spent the rest of lunch and recess swabbing herself out and drying off her pants. She even tried putting her mouth around the air-drier and having it blast out her bottom. All the rest of the day, it felt like her cheeks were little ovens of humiliation-heat.



*~*~*~*



But she made it back to the mall that afternoon with no one finding out, and it was much easier to run again by then (though when she opened her mouth wide, she could feel the wind pass through her ear-holes). In fact, she was beaming with pride by the time she turned the corner onto the woodsy truck road. She'd beaten her first devotion. She'd won! And she hadn't used her safeword, not even when she'd "peed" her pants! Coming up on the mall, she spotted Nyl waiting for her. She rushed over and hugged him, showing him she'd passed the test. Nyl swept her up into his arms and kissed her. And just for fun, he made her bones disappear. Tracy was like a giggling uninflated pool toy as he carried her inside to the fountain.

When he released her from her body, she was a bit surprised to find she was still hollow. "It hasn't been a full twenty-four hours yet, now has it?" he pointed out.

So she got to spend some time showing off her devotion to all the others. Everyone wanted to pat her tummy and peer through her ear-holes. Tracy demonstrated swallowing a handful of jellybeans, then pulling her pants down and letting them skitter all over the floor. This got a fantastic reception. Soon there were all sorts of suggestions for things she could swallow. Cassie brought over an 8 ball, and soon Tracy had it spinning around inside of her like an inverse hula hoop. Freddy wanted to try squeezing himself all the way in and wearing her like a suit. Tracy did not think she could stretch that far.

Once her time was up, Nyl returned her body mass with a long, passionate kiss. Tracy cherished every second of it. They all threw a party to celebrate her first devotion. Everyone ate plates of cake in the ball pit. Nyl had sworn them to secrecy for now about what all of their personal devotions had been, but it was heavily implied to Tracy that they had all been in the same general fashion: definitely humiliating, but also a lot of fun with the right mindset.

Nyl said she could take a day off if she wanted, but Tracy was energized. She wanted to leap into her second devotion right away.

"Allright," he said, "but remember, you asked for it."

A moment later, Tracy was missing her nose.

He had bent down to kiss it, and she'd thought it was just a sweet gesture. The pulling sensation lasted only a second. Then afterwards, she tried to breathe and couldn't! A gasp of surprise solved that problem, but when she reached up to feel her face, there was nothing but smooth fur from her muzzle to her mouth. She ran to the nearest storefront to see her reflection. No matter what angle she looked from, it was 100% gone.

"You said you thought it was too big," Nyl said nonchalantly. "You're welcome."

Tracy was whipping herself into a panic. "But I can't hide this!! It's not like the hollow thing! People are gonna SEE it!"

Nyl smirked, and shrugged at her in a 'not my problem' way. "Did you think they wouldn't get tougher each time?"

Tracy was about to protest that, and she did pout a bit. But he had a point. These were called devotions for a reason.

"You could always just make it go away by saying your safeword," he teased.

She stamped her foot. "No! I'll figure out something! Twenty-four hours?" She prayed he wouldn't say forty-eight.

"Twenty-four."

Well that was a small relief. Tracy looked back at her noseless reflection. Her face looked almost unrecognizable with her schnozzer gone. "I'll figure out something..." she said again.



*~*~*~*



When the clerk at the drugstore saw the chipmunk pop up in front of the counter with her sweater pulled up over her face, he thought for a moment he was about to be robbed.

Instead, in a nasal voice she asked, "Where do you keep those little mask things you wear when you don't want anyone else to catch your cold?"



*~*~*~*



Mom glared suspiciously. Something looked wrong about this.

"I was getting the sniffles today at lunch. The school nurse gave me this to wear until I was sure if it was a cold or just allergies." Her voice was a little muffled under the starchy white mask.

Mom squinted harder. "You're feeling allright? No flu symptoms, god forbid?"

"Nope! Just some sneezin'."

She wanted to interrogate Tracy more. This was yet another in a string of bizarre behaviors lately, but she had nothing to go on besides her gut. Still, she knew her daughter's face and something looked 'off' about it. "You're not covering up a nose ring under there? The neighbors wouldn't stop staring till you left for college!"

"No, Mom! I don't wanna get anything pierced anyway! That'd hurt!" She selectively forgot to mention that Cassie and Violet had convinced her to try all sorts of piercings last Friday at the mall. She just didn't retain them when she went back to her body.

Mom relented and was wooed back to complacency when the commercial break ended. Tracy ate dinner in the living room with them to hopefully ease some of their suspicion. It was a bit difficult maneuvering her fork around the mask, but at least she could properly chew this time. Everything tasted bland though.



*~*~*~*



The missing nose turned out to be even easier to deal with than the missing giblets. That night after dinner, Tracy made a decoy nose from the pompon off an old ugly knitted ski cap. She glued it on the inside of the mask and that made her look sufficiently normal. It tickled though. At breakfast the next day, she'd sneezed and her 'nose' slipped up onto her forehead. Thankfully she was able to get it back down before anyone saw. (Or so she assumed. Trixie was momentarily paralyzed with confusion over seeing her sister's nose migrate, and would be performing experiments on Trent later to see if they actually did come off.)

At school, the respiratory mask did a good job of keeping people from asking questions. The other kids gave her a wide berth, hoping she wasn't contagious. Tracy made sure to cough every now and then to seem realistic.

When she returned to the mall that afternoon, the other cubs all decided to join in and have Nyl kiss away their noses too. Soon there was a whole pack of smooth-muzzled cubs running around.

Freddy said to Bonnie, "Now you can stink as much as you like and no one will mind."

She shoved him into the fountain and he popped up giggling.

Cassie also decided to take advantage of everyone's temporary inability to smell and ripped a huge fart. Unfortunately, she forgot they made sounds. Blushing scarlet, she hid behind Nyl as everyone guffawed.

When the time was up and Tracy got her nose back, she spent a while admiring it in the mirror. For a moment she was going to ask if he'd made it bigger just to tease her. But no, it was her old regular honker, same as always. And while she still wasn't fond of it, it was certainly nice to inhale and exhale through it again.

She turned to Nyl, "Was this all just a plan to make me be okay with my big nose?"

He looked innocent. "Are you?"

She looked in the mirror again. A shrug. "I dunno really."

This time they went over to the candle store to celebrate. Everyone got their sniffers back to smell the various scents. Vanilla, pumpkin spice, tropical getaway, new car, bacon, etcetera. Nyl again suggested to Tracy that she could take a day off, as the third devotion was going to be incredibly difficult.

She thought a bit. The last two days had been stressful. But she'd gotten through them allright. And the sooner she finished these tests, the sooner she could say goodbye to sneaking back and forth between here and home. Even if it meant giving up her running, she knew in her heart that any sacrifice was acceptable. "Bring it on," she said, trying to sound brave.

And so, several minutes later when she had said all her goodbyes for the day, Tracy stepped back into her body. Nyl brought her back to reality and walked her over to a mirrored wall, where he told her to close her eyes and stand still. Tracy felt the same tingling pull as before. He was dissolving another part of her, and from the location of the sensation, she had a bad feeling about what was leaving her. Still, it felt so pleasant, that alone was worth it. She wondered if this was what it felt like when a soul went to live inside of him for a while.

She opened her eyes at his command, and then stood there in disbelief for quite a long while. She couldn't speak. Could hardly blink. This was not fair. This was an impossible challenge. Her face was fine. Her body was fine. Her legs were fine. But starting at her shoulders, there were only two small, brown, furry nubs.

"I look kinda cute like this," she remarked. She was still a bit in shock.



*~*~*~*



Since this was her most difficult devotion, Nyl had given her a couple of extra options. If she said her safeword, her arms would reappear for exactly ten seconds. Say it a second time, and she'd get five seconds more. The third time, game over. Mission failed.

Now she was standing on her doorstep wondering if she was going to have to use up her first ten seconds already.

Once she'd regained her senses, her mind went to work trying to puzzle out a way she could spend the next whole day like this. For starters, not knowing if it was cheating, she asked Nyl if she was allowed to get help from her friends. "You're allowed to do whatever you can think of to make it to tomorrow," he said. That was excellent. Since the other cubs were still around (just currently invisible), she asked if they could give her a hand. She saw them pick up her bracelet and tuck it safely in her pocket. Then at her direction, they tucked her jacket sleeves into her front pockets and used safety pins to make them stay. Next, they filled the empty arm holes with wadded-up clothing. Her jacket was just bulky enough to make the illusion work. Though whenever she moved, they bounced around pretty awkwardly. She'd have to practice with that.

Tracy glared down at the doorknob. Her house key was on her bracelet inside her pocket anyway. How was she supposed to get in!? It was freezing out here! Would she be stuck outside all night? She'd end up a chipmunk popsicle!

"Wait!" She ran back to the driveway to check. To her intense relief, one of the cars was in the garage! Tracy went back to the door and balanced on one leg while lifting her other one up to knock as normal-sounding as she could with her shoe.

Dad answered. Even better. Mom had been giving her the eagle eye for a week now. "Tracy? Don't you have a key? Did you lose it?"

Tracy coughed. Hard. Dad jumped back out of the way. She was so glad she'd kept her sick mask on. "I forgot my bracelet this morning," she said, then coughed some more. "And I definitely have a cold! D'you mind if I just go right up to my room and skip dinner? I don't wanna barf on anyone."

"Yeeeah, go right ahead." He shut the door behind her.

She headed towards the stairs. "Allright. Thanks Dad! Love you!"

"Just don't give it to the twins!" he called after her. "I'll lose my mind with three coughing kids in this house!"



*~*~*~*



Taking her shoes off took eight minutes. At first she tried kicking them loose, but the laces were too tight. Tracy was reduced to flopping down onto her bed and pulling them untied with her teeth. After that it wasn't too hard to get them off and let her toes breathe.

Though, as she looked down at her shoes lying on the floor, she realized she'd have to put them back on tomorrow. Tracy rarely swore, but that realization was worth an "Oh shit".

She stretched out on her bed and figured the best thing to do would be to just sleep through as much of the time as possible. She was able to scoot under the covers, but it turned out to be impossible to fall asleep in her jacket. The water-resistant material made squeaky scuffling noises whenever she moved. Groaning, she sat back up and managed to pull the zipper down with her toes. She slid out, careful to leave the stuffing in place. She'd have to thank Nyl later on for the fact that the scarves and safety pins hadn’t poofed into illusion-dust as soon as she'd left the mall's perimeter. With her mouth, she draped the jacket across her desk. She supposed she could use one of her safewords tomorrow to put it back on. She had left her backpack at the mall: homework be damned. She wouldn't be sticking around to find out how much her grades would fall this semester anyway.

That thought put her back in a good mood. Tracy sat on the edge of her bed and looked in the mirror at her little stumps just barely poking out from her t-shirt sleeves. She wiggled them. They looked like potatoes. She felt the oddest kind of thrill seeing her armless torso. She looked like that Venus statue. There was something pleasingly symmetrical and streamlined about having no arms. She wished she could squeeze her stumps to see what they felt like, but of course that was a paradox.

Tracy slithered back under her blankets and pulled them up over herself with her mouth. She rubbed her stumps over the cool, smooth sheets. They were very sensitive. Tracy groaned in annoyance at having no hands to let herself enjoy this moment a bit more. Although she still did have her creativity. After a few moments of fumbling around (trying first to sit on her heel and grind, but she couldn't reach), she managed to get a pillow stuck between her legs. Then, snatching glances back at the mirror every now and then to wave at herself with her tiny truncated limbs, she pounded her way into three lovely orgasms until she fell asleep.

It was dark when she woke up. She glanced at the clock. She'd slept through dinner, all the way till three forty-three a.m.. She thought she could maybe go right back to sleep, but her belly and bladder had different plans. She was hungry. And if she didn't want to wet the bed in about ten minutes, she'd have to hotfoot it to the bathroom.

The good news was, everyone else was asleep. The bad news was, everything else. Tracy took her socks off before venturing out, knowing she'd have to use her feet for makeshift hands a whoooole bunch of times before this adventure was through. Feet did a pretty good job at turning doorknobs, though were not so hot at getting her pants and panties out of the way. After an epic struggle, while her bladder threatened with each passing second to just let go and flood the whole room, she managed to get her undies around her ankles and her butt on the seat. Just in time! She sighed in bliss as she tinkled. Never had a pee been more rewarding. Though as soon as she was finished, the question occurred: 'How am I going to get my clothes back on again?' There was no other answer but the direct one. Tracy had to lay down across the bathroom floor and do the shimmy. Her feet could only help to push. The rest was all fifteen straight minutes of manipulating friction. For a moment, she thought she was gonna pass out and they'd find her right here in the morning, pantsless and unarmed. And afterwards, getting up was a chore too.

Tracy made her way down to the kitchen, taking each step slow so the hardwood wouldn't creek. Once she reached her destination, she scouted around for whatever she could eat. Okay, there were some peaches in a bowl on the table. Out of season, and mostly for decoration, but they'd still do. Opening the fridge on one foot, she peered inside. There were some leftovers, but it was all messy stuff. The best candidates she could find were an individually-wrapped string cheese, a pudding cup, and the half gallon of milk. She transferred each one to the floor, then sat down.

It turned out to be kinda fun actually. Her own little secret moonlight picnic. Plus there was the taboo of doing something so naughty as eating food with her stinky feet. Her heart was thumping the whole time for fear one of her parents would come downstairs for a midnight snack, but thankfully the whole house stayed entirely silent throughout her meal. Tracy found herself feeling quite proud of her limber body. She was able to hold the peach with both feet and lean over to take bites out of it. And it only took her two tries to launch the pit into the trash with her mouth-cannon. She tried getting the wrapper off the cheese with her toes but that was a fool's errand. She just chewed it open instead. And for her pudding dessert, she held the edge of the cup between her lips and simply lapped out of it. Though she also couldn't resist slurping some off her toes too.

By the end, she'd been having enough foot practice by now to get the cap off the milk with ease. She took a long, refreshing gulp. Getting the cap back on was trickier, but she accomplished it. Setting the jug back on the fridge shelf, she whispered, "Sorry if it's got a paw aroma tomorrow, everyone." Tracy put her trash away and went back upstairs to bed, very pleased with herself.



*~*~*~*



Waking up the next day, she knew it was going to be a toughie. There was no doubt in her mind that she didn't want to deal with her parents, so it'd be easy enough to just take her time, then dash downstairs at the last minute like she'd gotten up late. And that worked out doubly because she was going to need that time to figure out a way to get her clothes back on.

First she did her best to 'comb' her hair by bending over and swabbing her head against the pillow until it was at least all pointed in one direction. Then she looked at her shoes. She knew ten seconds was not much. Maybe not even enough time to tie both of them. "Do I absolutely have to though?" Carefully she lined them up, then stuffed the laces down deep inside. Getting her socks on afterwards took a lot of toe-pulling, and at least one use of teeth, but they were on. Then she wedged her feet in her shoes and hoped they wouldn't slide off.

Then the jacket. This was not gonna be easy. She lifted it up by the collar with her mouth and brought it to her bed like a mother cat carrying a very jacket-shaped kitten. She laid it out on her bed, then tried to wriggle into it like a snake. By now she knew there was no way she was getting the zipper up without using one of her safewords. Still, she gave it a valiant effort anyway, leaning over almost far enough to bite her bellybutton, trying to grab it with her teeth. Eventually she surrendered. She sat up with the jacket balanced across her shoulders, and said, "Vandyke."

Do you have any idea how hard it is to zip up a jacket while both your arms are inside it?

Still, Tracy managed. She got the zipper halfway up, pulling from the bottom, then got it the rest of the way with her mouth. She was no longer upset at having big buck teeth, as they made splendid zipper-handlers. She even had three seconds left to properly position her fake arms and make sure the sleeves were deep in the pockets.

Then, poof. Her arms were simply gone again. It felt like they'd turned instantly into air.

Tracy checked herself out in the mirror. Not bad.

Except she'd left her respiratory mask lying on her desk.

"Craaaaaaaap!"

She had exactly enough time to shove her head through it and bonk her face against the wall to get it in place before it became necessary to gnaw open the bedroom door, kick it shut, then go flying downstairs.

Trent was loitering in the kitchen. Perfect. "Get the door for me!!" she shouted. Being three, he didn't think much about the request. He just stared after his sister while she ran down the street with her hands crammed in her pockets.

Tracy was extremely glad that school bus doors opened automatically.



*~*~*~*



Once again the mask was useful in keeping people away. Tracy tried to look drowsy and miserable and cough a little every now and then. Doors were not usually a problem for her, since there was always someone else entering or exiting that she could squeeze past and not bother with the knob. She sat at her desk and hoped like heck it would be just another day of listening to the teachers drone.

Thankfully, she was a good actress. Her coughs became more natural-sounding and pitiful, and her first three teachers were content to let her follow along without asking anything else of her. Sometimes the other students stared, but it was an 'Ughh I hope I don't catch that' stare, not a 'That girl doesn't have any arms!' stare. When each period's bell rang, there was enough noise and bustle that no one noticed how her sleeves wobbled and made rustling sounds.

Then lunchtime came. Tracy knew there was no way she could fake eating in the cafeteria, so she made like a spy and hid in the shadows while everyone else went past. Then she sought sanctuary in the library. A bit of luck: the doors there had push-handles. It felt kinda adventurous to be in the big book-filled room all by herself. She couldn't plop down a novel and peruse it, but she could read all the titles and the posters on the walls.

In fact, she couldn't see any reason not to spend the whole rest of the day in here. She found an invisible spot amongst the stacks and hunkered down. Waiting would be tedious, but it was less risky than going back to class.

Or so she thought.

"Miss? Are you asleep? Are you even supposed to be in here?"

Tracy was jolted awake. She'd fallen dead asleep with her back to the atlases. For a horrifying instant she thought that the voice was the principal. Instead it was the assistant librarian. Not as bad, but not good either. The bat lady leaned down to take hold of Tracy's arm, and the little chipmunk impressed herself with how quickly she leapt to her feet and out of the way. "I'm sorry!"

The bat looked her up and down, peering through her spectacles. "This is a library. Not a bed and breakfast. Class has already started." She squinted. "And do you have something in your pockets?"

As she leaned in closer, Tracy came very, very close to shouting her safeword. 'No! Wait! Not until it's absolutely necessary!' She knew she might face and even more dire situation later. With microseconds to spare, Tracy fell back on a plan that had been working all day. She doubled over in a horrific coughing fit. The bat lady stumbled back and covered her ears at Tracy's sheer volume. Tracy coughed as if her life depended on it, till her throat felt like it had been rubbed with a cheese grater. There were tears in her eyes when she looked up. "I'm sorry," she said again. "I kept coughing at lunch. I think I'm really sick. I didn't want to infect anyone else so I thought I'd just stay in here, out of the way."

The librarian looked halfway between concerned and germophobic. "That was very thoughtful of you, sweetheart. But maybe you should have gone to see the nurse instead?"

Tracy sniffed. "Yeah. I didn't think of that."

"Better still, maybe you ought to just go home." She gave Tracy a comforting pat on the back, while keeping as much distance between them as possible. "Wait here for a moment. I'll write you a pass."

"Thanks, ma'am." Score!

Though when Tracy watched the nice librarian trot off towards her desk, a dooming thought came upon her. She'd have to take the pass. She was suddenly very glad she hadn't used her five seconds. Though what would happen if she did? Would her arms pop into existence inside of her sleeves or underneath them?

The bat was now approaching, holding out a little slip of yellow paper. "Here we are. Just take this to the office before you go."

Tracy's heart stopped. But then, in her moment of greatest desperation, a brilliant lie saved the day. "Um, could you just tuck it in my back pocket? I, um, I sneezed on my hands."

"Oh," the bat said, grimacing. She very gingerly slipped the slip, then sent Tracy on her way with a "Get well soon!"

Her 'I sneezed on my hands' trick worked at the office too.



*~*~*~*



Then she was free! She had a brief bit of trouble chinning open the back exit door, but after that she was definitely free! She raced like a rocket down Mayes street headed east. She was delirious with relief. She'd gotten through the whole school day! That last part was kind of cheating, but oh well. She'd gotten out of the building and still hadn't used her second safeword!!! She was supremely awestruck at her own quick wit and good luck. In fact she was in such high spirits that it barely even bothered her when she tripped and went crashing into the sidewalk.

Pure reflex saved her from a chipped tooth or broken nose. She pivoted at the last instant and landed on her right shoulder. It stung like a banshee. She licked her lips to make sure everything was still intact and tasted a bit of blood. A cut lip. Not too bad.

A passing badger gentleman saw her struggling to get up. "Hey! You allright?"

"I'll be okay, thanks!" She vaulted upright acrobatically and sped off, but thought it was very nice of him to ask.

The badger thought that her dangling right sleeve probably explained why she'd fallen in the first place.

Tracy became aware of the flaw in her disguise a few minutes later, but did not stop to correct it. If she was fast enough, she could simply outrun anyone who'd be curious about it. Let them think there was an amputee girl with SARS on the loose. She had more important things to worry about than public perception. Destination: Mall.

Nyl was waiting for her outside again. He met her halfway across the parking lot, rushing in for a hug. She was panting, having run so hard she was sweaty in the late November cold.

He nuzzled into her hair. "You're early! I thought my radar was going bonkers when it told me you were on the way."

It took a few tries to get the words out. "I faked sick. Left school. Early. I did it though! I made it! The whole day! And I only used ONE safeword!"

Nyl was astonished. "Tracy, you're incredible! I made this one as hard as I could! I honestly didn't expect you to beat it! I was going to give you a big hug and tell you that you'd shown plenty of devotion just trying, and we'd have a party to celebrate anyway. But... you've knocked my socks off!"

She giggled and closed her eyes and squeezed herself as tight to him as she could manage. Her breath made white puffs in the air when she laughed. Her legs were throbbing and her shoulder still hurt and there were little drops of blood inside her mask, but she was here. She'd done it. She had shown her devotion.

Nyl leaned in closer to wrap his arms around and rock her slowly. He nibbled her ear. "You are amazing," he told her with every ounce of his sincerity.

She murred, drinking in his warmth, his voice, his comfort. She looked up with a playful twinkle. "Can we still have that party celebration even though I didn't lose?"

He belly-laughed. "Course not! We'll have an even bigger one!" He scooped her into his arms with one smooth gesture, making her giggle in delight. He carried her back towards the mall. Leaning in to nuzzle her nose, he began to transfer back her mass.

"Hey!" she said. "It hasn't been a full twenty-four yet!"

He grinned proudly. "How dumb of me. You are completely correct."

Tracy nodded. She would see her devotion all the way to its finish. Plus, she figured the other cubs would get a kick out of ogling her nubs.



*~*~*~*



Tracy woke up the next morning before her alarm. She rolled over onto her back and just luxuriated in that heavy, golden, post-sleep bliss. Sunlight shone through her window. Her plushies were warm and snuggly. She wouldn't have to bring them with her when she left; Nyl had assured her that, just like all the goods in the mall, she would bring with her anything that she carried in her memories.

She was going to have her music player though, that was indisputable. One last run out in the open air with it.

They really had put on a wonderful party for her last night. Nyl had lifted her soul from her body to a tremendous cheer. She was absolutely bulldozed by hugs, and nearly fell into the fountain. Everyone was indeed fascinated with her stumps. She even let the other cubs rub them, which made her coo at the unique sensation. With a glance to the sky, Nyl turned the falling snow into confetti. Soon they were all up to their ankles in the colorful stuff. Cassie wheeled out a massive stereo system perched on a janitor's cart and the air bounced with tunes. Violet and Kevin showed off a cake they had made together. Kevin had drawn on it with icing: a stomach, a nose, and two arms. Tracy actually cried when she saw it. And since her time wasn't up yet, she happily let everyone else feed her handfuls.

Once she got her arms back, Tracy was so excited she tore off towards the south levels and replicated her Christmas tree leap. With the branches fully decorated, there was an explosion of sparks, flying baubles, and falling tinsel. Tracy slid all the way down in a hail of ornaments, landing on her butt in the pile of presents below, laughing helplessly. The others gathered her up on their shoulders and led the way to the food court for a saturnalian feast. Afterwards they danced and sang karaoke and rode bikes around in circles. Tracy even smashed some toilets with a sledgehammer.

The only bad part of it was coming home.

Tracy had decided to throw caution to the wind and stay out as late as she wanted. She arrived home, shivering from the night chill, at nearly eight p.m.. She paused on the doorstop to put her smile away. She had no idea what she was going to face once she stepped inside, but she knew that whatever it was, it would not get under her skin. This would be the last night she'd ever spend in this house. Nyl had said she could join his family whenever she chose to. Here in the dark on her doorstep, she was starting to regret chickening out on joining him right then and there.

She turned her key in the lock and stepped inside, cringing. Expecting a shout and a demand for her to get her ass into the livingroom this instant. Instead the kitchen was dark and silent. Light came from the livingroom, where everyone was gathered around the television as usual. Tracy squeaked out an inaudible, "I'm home" to no response.

She tiptoed through the dining room and peeked around the doorway. Everyone was just watching TV like normal. Had they not heard her come in? Maybe. Though she hadn't tried to hide it. The twins were lying on the floor, statufied with rapture at whatever CGI cartoon was on the screen. Dad looked half-asleep, and Mom was squeezed in next to him, looking pleased as a nesting hen. Tracy walked past them behind the couches, not trying to hide, anticipating whatever lecture was incoming.

She got to the stairwell without a word spoken to her, and somehow that felt a thousand times worse.

She turned around. Her mother's bottomlessly-smug smirk told her volumes.

'What? Did you expect something from us? You're the one who can't make herself breathe the same air as her own family. Why should we care if you stay out all night?' She batted her lashes: the very picture of doe-eyed passive-aggression.

Tracy felt sick. She looked to Dad. He wasn't daydreaming after all; he was strenuously not making eye contact with either of them. 'This is not my problem.'

Tracy looked back at Mom, honestly wishing she'd get yelled at over this saccharine-drizzled cold shoulder.

Mom's face gave her nothing. Just a slight inclined nod that said, 'Go on now. Get up to your room. It's where you want to be anyway.'

Tracy opened her mouth to say something, but then stopped. She climbed the stairs in silence. Fine. They were just making her decision easier.

Tracy had gone to bed and stayed there. Now, with the new morning sun falling on her cheeks, she thought about Nyl's last warning to her.

As the party had been winding down, he'd given her a nod to join him and take a walk away from the noisy crowd. She followed. They sat on a bench outside a menswear boutique.

"You know you're welcome here," he said.

Tracy sensed a 'but'.

"...But I need to know for sure you've thought this through. For my own conscience. It's not that I don't trust you to know your own heart. I just have to hear you say it."

She nodded. "Okay. I'm sure I want to be here."

"Are you? Absolutely?"

"Uh-huh. I just want to belong somewhere. Even if it's in your tummy. Especially if it's there."

He chuckled at the cute answer. Then he stared into the distance for a moment.

Suddenly he turned and somehow loomed over her with nothing more than a shift in body language. He brought his full presence to bear upon her, transforming from an angel to a black-coated, orange-eyed demon. "You are ready to give up the home you grew up in and the family that raised you?"

She gulped, but managed to say, "I am."

"You are ready to go missing, and break their hearts? And the hearts of all your friends at school? And everyone else who has ever known you and cared about you?"

She winced. She closed her eyes, not being able to face his excoriating gaze. "...I am."

"You are ready to give your very soul to me, to devour? To digest into nothingness if I choose?"

"Y-you wouldn't."

"Wouldn't I? You've known me less than a season. How can you trust me so much?"

Tracy turned her face away. "I just... do. I do no matter what."

He persisted. "You are aware I will share my love with the others? You will not be my special perfect princess, the only star of the show?"

"I'm okay with that," she said steadfastly.

He leaned in even closer. "You are aware what giving yourself to me will mean? It will not be a pleasant transformation like the others."

She was aware. He had told her in a private moment several days ago. The idea had terrified her then, and still did now. But the pain wouldn't last forever. It would be over much, much quicker than her devotions, and she'd persevered through all of those. "I know."

"You understand that I won't be able to lessen any of the agony?"

She felt Nyl's ragged, intense breathing puffing at the side of her face like a steam engine's exhaust. "I understand."

The girl was trembling, almost on the verge of tears. "You accept that you will be leaving behind your one and only life, and any chance you'll ever have to make it better, in exchange for a world of illusion? Fake tricks? None of it real?"

Tracy had her eyes closed, head tucked down to her chest, leaning as far away from that volcanic hot breath as she could. But she didn't leave her seat. When she answered, it was with as much calm as she could manage. "I accept. Because it is real. You love all the other cubs, and that's real. You love me, and that's real too. And I love you. That's real."

Nyl changed back to a humbled, trembling angel in a heartbeat, and swept her into a tight, fierce embrace.

They held each other silently for what seemed like ages.

Finally he spoke, and it was muffled by his muzzle pressed tightly against her collar. "I am so sorry for that. I needed to. You are so brave, Tracy."

"It's okay," she said back, and kissed his shoulder.

Now, a morning later in bed, Tracy remembered the warmth of that long-held hug. She pulled her blankets tight around her. When she had left last night, the last thing she'd said was, "I'll be back tomorrow morning! It's Saturday!" She looked at the clock and it was. No school. No more waiting.

She looked to her bedside table and saw a second sun. A little golden ball that she'd rescued. A ludicrously naughty whim captured her. She snatched the ornament off the table and tucked it into her pajama bottom. She took the utmost care not to shatter it, knowing exactly how bad of an outcome that could be, but she turned towards her pile of plushies and yiffed the living heck out of her ornament. So perfectly round and smooth. It was admittedly awkward to hump a sphere, but Tracy persisted until the deed was done. Her passion rose quickly, inflamed by the taboo of violating such an innocent symbol of holiday joy. Yet more importantly, it was a symbol of Nyl. Of him and the mall and her friends and every memory she had of them all together. Tracy rocked back and forth, kicking at her bedsheets, and climaxed.

She licked her ornament clean and inspected it for cracks. Not a one. And her honey was pretty tasty too. Setting her ball back on the table, she thought it looked a little bewildered by the experience. Truth be told, she was too. Even just a few moments ago she couldn't have predicted doing something so improper. But it was done all the same, and she couldn't deny she'd enjoyed it. Maybe soon it wouldn't be her ornament she was yiffing.

Her covers were so comfy, she might have stayed in bed another hour. "But destiny awaits," she told herself with a dramatic flair, and giggled. Tracy got up, stretched, put on a comfortable outfit, tucked her music in her pocket, and left her bedroom. In her hand was a note. She was going to leave it on the kitchen table. It would explain as much as she could tell without sounding crazy.

Downstairs was deserted. Tracy went to the kitchen window. Dad's car was gone. She checked the whiteboard. Ah. The twins had swimming today. That made things much easier. Tracy took a moment to fill a glass with cereal, pour some milk on top, and drink it all down. Simple, quick, and refreshing.

She re-read her goodbye note, checking for typos or anything more she wanted to say. No, it was enough. No postscript needed. She turned around to take a last look goodbye at the house. She hadn't heard her mother come downstairs.

"What's that you're holding?"

*~*~*~*





FIVE WEEKS LATER

*~*~*~*

He manifested himself at the absolute edge of his limit. Past the parking lot entirely, standing in the road with black trees swaying in the January wind like living shadows. His orange eyes stared into the darkness. It was almost four in the morning, but he knew damn well what he'd felt.

Then he saw movement. One shadow blending through all the others in the moonlight. Coming from a different direction than he expected.

He called out her name and his words made no frost in the air. But soon he saw a twitching, bundled, slumping shape approaching, puffing out tiny white clouds with every step.

He physically could not take a step closer. He reached out to her and saw his arm starting to fade and warp. He screamed her name again.

When he saw her eyes, they were frozen open. Almost literally. Tiny icicles had formed in her eyelashes. Her tears and running nose had turned to ice. He strained towards her, but could only watch in excruciation as she limped on icicle feet towards him.

She did not hug him so much as collapse onto him. Nylsearis dropped to his knees and pulled her in close He nuzzled into her hair. Left fierce kisses all along her scalp. She had almost no body heat. It was like holding a beef bone in a meat freezer.

"TRACY!!! WHERE WERE YOU!?"



*~*~*~*



An hour ago, she had been lying in bed.

Her mother stood at the entrance to her bedroom. It was no longer a doorway, as the door had been removed. "Are you all tucked in?"

"Yes, Mom," the young chipmunk said in monotone.

"Take your pills?"

"Yes, Mom."

"Gonna get a good night's rest and do great at school tomorrow?"

"Yes, Mom."

"Your father will be up and ready to drive you to school."

"I know, Mom. Just like always."

The woman stood there in the hall light, looking at the lump of her daughter shadowed under bedsheets. The smile fell from her face. "I don't like this any more than you do. But remember, you chose this." She turned and stalked off towards her bedroom, wishing she had something to slam.

Tracy stared up at the ceiling. It had been like this, almost word for word, every night for weeks. Ever since the hospital had let her go. Tonight was her breaking point. She was either going to escape or die. She didn't know how, but she hoped Nyl could somehow catch her if the latter happened.

She kept herself awake all through the night. Pinching her thigh every time her eyelids felt heavy. Even digging her little claws into her palm so hard she nearly broke the skin. In the dark she whispered to herself, "I got through all three devotions. I can keep myself awake a few more stupid hours."

She felt her bladder ring the pee alarm, but forced herself to ignore it. Actually, the discomfort helped keep her awake, so that was good. She screwed her legs together back and forth, and through sheer force of will made the urge stop. Dad had installed a motion detector in the hallway. If she'd gotten up to pee, there would have been a loud noise like a trombone blat, and then one of them would've been up in a flash to check on her.

The pills made her drowsy. Damn stupid pills. Awful, ugly, chalky little pills. Tracy looked at her dresser and knew the little amber bottle was among the indistinct dark shapes there. "Fuck you, pills," she whispered. To the best of her knowledge, she had never said the f-word before in her life. But those dumb rotten pills deserved it. They were leaning on her mind. Trying to make her eyes close. Trying to make her sink into the bed like quicksand. She had to stay awake. She reached back and pulled her tail: three hard yanks. That sent enough pain up her spine to keep her eyes open a few minutes more.

She turned away from the room, making sure she wasn't in too comfortable a position, and ran through the lyrics of every song she knew the words to. She remembered the times tables. She took herself back in her memories to every wonderful, magic moment that had happened to her at the mall. All her friends, who WERE NOT IMAGINARY. Who were REAL. No matter what those STUPID DOCTORS MADE HER SAY.

When she had reached the absolute limit of her tolerance, she rolled over to look at the clock and saw she'd overshot her goal by twelve minutes. She almost started crying. The pills made that difficult too.

Tracy lifted away her covers. In absolute silence, moving in 100% slow motion, she got herself ready. She had placed a pair of sweatpants and a warm fleece shirt at the foot of her bed under her blankets. Her socks and underwear were already on beneath her pajamas. She was about to take the pajamas off to begin dressing, but figured an extra layer of insulation was not a bad idea. In fact it was such a good idea, she reached way over to the hamper and pulled out an extra pair of socks too. Dirty, but weather this cold killed off odors. She put her pants on. She put her shirt on. She put her heaviest coat and her shoes on.

Then she turned to her window and, agonizingly slow, opened it up. Just as carefully, she lifted the storm window and let in the biting cold air.

It cut through her like a hail of daggers. Like falling through helicopter rotors made of ice. This was not some breezy mid-November afternoon. This was the dead of night in January. There was almost a foot of snow in the backyard. In fact, she knew exactly how much snow was in the backyard. Tracy shuffled forward, towards the moon, holding the storm window up above her head. She eased herself out the bedroom window until she was perched on the ledge eleven feet off the ground.

She eased the pane back into place behind her. Hesitated. Then let it click shut.

That was it. She had literally nowhere else to go now. She looked down at the snow. Dotted here and there with footprints from the twins, but mostly an intact blanket of white. It would either cushion her fall or it wouldn't. She would either break her neck or she wouldn't. She would either drive her shins up through her kneecaps or she wouldn't. The pills were good for exactly one thing: they dulled her emotions and made her listless, so it was easy to go completely limp when she let go.

WOOMPH

Tracy looked up at the stars. Except she was looking down, not up. The stars were little flecks of color shooting around in her vision. The pain hadn't even kicked in yet, but she knew it was going to be bad. That was okay though. She'd known it was going to hurt. The more important question was, could she get up and walk?

Turned out she could. Awesome.

Tracy stood there in the snow, feeling like a pile of broken broomsticks nailed together. The January wind clawed at her face, and she tucked her muzzle down low into her collar. She wished she'd brought a scarf. She took a few steps, wincing. She'd probably broken a toe, but her feet were gonna be ice cubes soon so that wouldn't bother her long. She felt all up and down her body. Amazingly, nothing else seemed broken. "Thank you, snow," she said quietly.

She took in a deep breath. It was like inviting icicles into her lungs. She was outside, but she knew that was only half the plan. This was like a spacewalk. She had just jumped out of the airlock, and now she was in the void. She looked up at the onyx sky and the silver stars. This was the part where she had to jump across the raw coldness of the cosmos to get to the other space station before she froze to death. That was literally what would happen if she didn't keep moving. It was below zero out here. The only thing keeping her from dying was herself. So she got going.

She slogged through the backyard. She forced open the gate. There was so much darn snow in the way she had to squeeze through sideways. Her gasps of pain left clouds in the air. She ran down the driveway, across the neighbor's yard, heading east.

But once she reached the shoveled sidewalk, she turned right back around in the opposite direction. Maybe it would snow by morning and it wouldn't matter. But she wanted to make sure they wouldn't get her again. Doubling back past the house (and fighting off the terror that her mom would be looking out the window that very instant), she headed west, then turned north at the corner. She was inverting her usual route. Go north, get to Chambers, and head east that way. There might be more lights along the freeway, but if she stuck close to the sides of buildings, it might keep her concealed and lessen the wind.

Tracy didn't have her music player any more, but she had her memory. She recalled a good song with a steady beat and headed off.

The night turned familiar houses unfamiliar. Shadow-frosted nightmares. Trees and mailboxes looked like strange grownups hanging around out in the dark, just on the borders of her vision. Tracy kept her focus on the sidewalk ahead, watching out for ice. She did not run too fast. She didn't want to overexert herself and pass out. That would be very bad. She wanted to maintain just enough of a pace to keep her heart going and keep herself warm. She thanked the stars above for her pajama idea. The wind would have cut her guts out otherwise. She was already starting to wish she'd put on three pairs of socks.

She turned east. "Halfway there. I can do this. I passed all three of my devotions. All three."

Tracy ran past empty fast food restaurants, a church with all its lights out, and a shuttered garage with gleaming metal shapes piled in the windows. There was a huge shopping center parking lot she had to cross. It made her feel like a tiny running bug, so easy to pick off for the swooping wind vultures. There was more light on this road, but it was all unforgiving. It made everything blinding bright or pitch black. Tracy was glad she'd practiced jogging around the neighborhood after dark. Her parents had only let her do it in the summer, but still, she'd developed very good night vision. Plus, the snow was helpfully reflective. She even spotted a dime in the street between the dry cleaners and the seafood place, but she left it there for someone else to find.

Her pace was good and steady, but she staggered to a stop at the corner where the mall was.

Where the mall had been.

She stared. Gut-punched. Disbelieving. It was a giant vacant lot. Nothing more. It had been bulldozed down to the foundation. No more skylights. No more tree. No more angel.

She felt tears form at the corners of her eyes and freeze almost instantly.

"NO!!!" she screamed into the night. Not caring if anyone heard. Because this was unfair. Not after she'd planned for so long and ran all night and fell out of a stupid damn window and-

Stupid. Oh yes she was. She barked a hoarse laugh. This was the wrong corner. Whatever had been here wasn't the mall. When she ran down her normal path, it was the third dirt road heading north, not the first.

Hope filling her heart again, Tracy stared into the distance. There! Less than a mile away, she could just barely see the arch of the old mall sign.

She was too worn out for a shout of joy, even though she definitely wanted one. And even better, she realized she could turn her mistake into a positive. A big vacant lot like this, she could cut across diagonally to that little parallel road that ran behind the buildings. She knew it connected through; she'd used it as a shortcut once. She wouldn't have to circle around the mall to get to the back entrance.

She headed southeast. This would save a bit of time. Which was good because she couldn't feel her feet all the way up past her ankles. They might have fallen off three blocks ago for all she knew.

The shortcut behind the buildings was almost totally black. It had also not been plowed very well. Tracy forced herself up and over minor mountains of snow, past dumpsters that still managed to stink, even in this chill. The darkness was massive. On any other night she would have been paralyzed with fear, picturing all the monsters and killers that were lurking in it. But she forced herself to believe there was nothing there. And of course there wasn't. Nothing else living was out tonight in this cold.

She came to the end of the alley. She saw a very handsome fox in a blue guardsman's uniform staring down the tree-lined road, searching in the shadows for her. The nastiest part of her mind told her it was a mirage. Did people start to hallucinate when they got too cold? Or was that when they got too hot? She didn't know. But she'd had too many ugly surprises lately to let herself believe in this one. Not until she was falling into his arms and he was planting kisses in her hair.

He asked her where she'd been. "I tried to," was all she could get out at the moment. She was awfully tired.

When he picked her up and carried her towards the building, it was such a relief, she actually began to smile.



*~*~*~*



Nyl waved the loose board out of his way. Tracy felt like a bundle of icicles. He gave her toes an experimental pinch and got no reaction. He quickened his stride through the dingy stockroom and Payne's graffiti'd walls.

It was hard for Tracy to believe where she was. She'd been walking for so long it seemed impossible she'd actually reached her destination. The warmth of the building hadn't caught up to her yet. Her legs still felt like they were walking. But no, Nyl was. Her angel was holding her and carrying her inside.

The mall was dark, lit only by moonbeams let in through the skylight. But the Christmas tree was glowing bright too. Tracy's smile grew a little as they drew closer towards it. Green and gold and silver. So pretty. She was kind of glad he hadn't put on the whole illusion for her. That would have been overwhelming. This, just this, was nice.

He looked down at the shivering fluffball in his arms, amazed she was smiling after coming in from weather like that. Had she walked all the way from home? "We are getting you straight into the hot tub and out of your body, little one. You have no idea how-"

"No."

He stopped in his tracks. His footsteps echoed for a few seconds after. Her request had been perfectly clear, but he didn't understand it. "No?"

Tracy looked up to him and the drowsiness was starting to clear from her eyes. "I'm so sorry I made you wait. And I'm sure everyone else wants to know what happened to me. But I just can't. Now. Please. Take me into the restroom and do the ritual like you told me about. Please."

His breath quickened. "Tracy, you vanish for over a month and now you show up out of nowhere and ask me for that!? Forgive me if I'm confused!"

"Let's sit down then," she croaked. Then winced. "But not for too long, okay?"

He nodded. He did not waste time taking her anywhere else. A bench emerged right there in the middle of the lower south concourse and he sat on it. He moved to slide Tracy down beside him, but she shook her head.

"Can I sit on your lap?"

He kissed her forehead. "You certainly can." He positioned the little chipmunk as comfy as he could, holding her upright with his arms interlocked around her shoulders. "If you don't want to discorporate, that's okay. I'm happy to do whatever you need from me. But can you at least give me a short explanation? I've been so worried! We've ALL been so worried!"

Tracy looked around the empty mall. Yet of course it wasn't empty. She couldn't see them, but she knew her friends were all there. Probably still in their pajamas and yawning, but they'd be there. "Hi," she said to the echoing room. Every part of her ached, including her neck, so she turned back to Nyl and just let her head flop against his shoulder.

He brushed his fingers through her fur, thinking she'd fallen straight to sleep.

She hadn't. It was just easier to close her eyes. "I shouldn't have left after the party," she said. "I came home just to see it one more time. But the next day, Mom snuck up on me. She saw my note, the one I was going to leave behind to tell them why I'd gone. I tried to hide it from her but she pulled it out of my hands. I stood there while she read it and I knew everything was over. When she was done, she looked up at me with this look..." Tracy shuddered. "Like she hated me more than anything in the world."

Nyl gave her a squeeze and a kiss.

Tracy sniffled. "But she wasn't angry about me running away." She shook her head. "No, she started yelling about how I'd messed up her big surprise. How she'd been waiting to tell the whole family the good news, and I blew it. 'You're always making things more difficult for me, Tracy! You had to go and ruin my special moment! This was supposed to be MY day!' I kept asking and asking what she meant, and finally she swung around and screamed it in my face: 'Tracy, I'm pregnant again'."

Nyl had been running his paw along the back of her head in a soothing motion. At that last word, he stopped short. "Oh dear."

She snorted at his understatement. Getting warm was vital to her body at that moment, but tearing these words out of secrecy was even more vital to her mental health. "I knew right away what she'd been thinking. 'Things aren't perfect enough around here, so let's try to make it all better with a new baby. That'll fix everything!' Except it wouldn't. It just meant, now the twins were going to go through everything that I had. Feeling forgotten and left behind. Replaced. I felt so bad for them. When Mom told me, I guess I couldn't keep the horror off my face. So she got even angrier. She started drinking wine right out of the bottle, and she was shaking me by the arm, and then she called Dad and told him to come home and punish me, and then I guess that wasn't enough because then she called the cops."

Nyl's ears stood straight up. "The police?"

"The actual police!" Tracy said. "There was a big crazy scene in the driveway when they pulled up. Mom and I were both yelling over the sirens, trying to tell our sides of it. Dad showed up afterwards and at first the cops thought he was just some guy trying to intrude, so they were shoving him back, and that scared the twins, so they were yelling too. Mom showed the cops my note and I knew they were gonna take her side. I started fighting and screaming to get away, but those guys are really strong. They put me in the SUV, and I ended up at this little kids' mental hospital. They kept me there for two weeks. They thought my letter was a suicide note."

"Oh, Tracy. Poor sweetiefur." He protectively nuzzled her forehead. "A part of me thought maybe you'd changed your mind. That you'd stayed with your family to try to repair things with them."

Tracy wrinkled her nose. "I had a magic mall and an angel who hugs me. Who would ever give that up?"

He chuckled. "Well said. Go on, little one."

She sighed. "The hospital wasn't too bad. The other patients were mostly nice. But I got stupid and told my roommate about you guys, and she tattletaled, and then the doctors were all over me. Telling me I had delusions. Telling me I had to come back down to the real world. They put me on pills. I guess they thought they were doing the right thing, but they made me say you weren't real." She sniffled. "I didn't want to. But I knew they'd never let me out unless I said so."

Nyl nodded. He wiped her tear away with a fingertip.

"So I lied. And they looked real happy with me and said I'd made progress and let me come home. They'd told me a lot of stuff at the hospital about how Mom and Dad really cared about me and wanted me to get better. And I wanted to believe that, I really did. But when they drove up to get me, that drive home was so awful. They wouldn't say a word to me. We drove for two whole hours like that. And once we were home, Dad just vanished and Mom sat me down in the livingroom and..." She choked on her words.

"Take your time," Nyl whispered to her.

She took his advice, and took deep breaths. "Mom only cared about the neighbors," Tracy finally said. "She didn't even say anything about all the other stuff. She was pissed at me over everyone seeing the cops in front of our house. Even though she was the one who called them! She said the whole neighborhood was talking behind her back, and what an embarrassment that was, and wasn't I selfish and thoughtless, and what about HER!!" She shouted that last word so forceful it made her start coughing. Nyl rubbed her back in a circular motion. "Thanks."

"Very welcome. Go on. I am listening to every word."

Tracy nodded. "She told me no more running. Dad would take me to school every morning and pick me up. He basically stopped talking to me after that. Like I was some package in his car he had to deliver. I don't think he hates me, he just doesn't know how to deal with the whole situation. So he just... doesn't. And Mom..." Tracy clenched her teeth. "She said things were going to be perfect from now on. She said I was going to be a good girl and help out with the new baby. She'd searched my whole room and got rid of everything she thought was 'rebellious'. My posters. Half my clothes. My music player..." Pain gripped her heart for a moment, but from it she drew a sharp, spiteful smile. "I held on to this though."

Tracy's frozen fingers didn't want to unzip her winter coat, but she made them do it anyway. She rooted around in her inner pocket until she felt a poke.

Nyl saw her take out a curved triangular shard of gold plastic.

"She broke it, and tried to throw it away. But I found a piece and kept it. I looked at it every time I was alone. I remembered you."

Nyl was overwhelmed. "Tracy... I cannot stop saying how brave you are."

She smiled.

"But I think you're misremembering," he said.

She opened one eye questioningly, and then happiness spread across her whole face.

"How could she possibly break this? It's indestructible."

Tracy was holding a perfectly intact gold ornament in her paw. It was such a simple trick. She'd even known he'd probably do this. Yet it still filled her with so much inexpressible joy that, tired as she was, she pulled his paw closer to her mouth to kiss his fingers. "Thank you. Thank you. Thank you, oh thank you, Nyl."

He tickled her chinfur. "I have not even started cheering you up, little chipmunk."

She smiled. "There's only one thing I want."

He knew what that was. He glanced towards the gentleman's restrooms. "I know by now how strong your will is. You want to fulfill what we agreed to back in November."

A resolute nod. "I do. For a while I thought maybe I was just being selfish, but I can't stay in that house anymore. I can't. I can't keep being unhappy just to make them happy."

He pulled her close and kissed between her ears. "That isn't selfish. Not at all. You are not obligated to keep on giving to people who only take."

Tracy thought about that for a moment.

Nyl stared off into the middle distance. "What you're asking though... It's going to hurt. It's gonna hurt so bad. I hate to have to put you through that. Are you sure you can handle it?"

She grinned in a very Saffron way. "I jumped out my bedroom window tonight. I froze my toes off, and one of 'em's broken probly. I can deal."

He nodded in acknowledgment. "You won't be able to see your friends for a little while. It'll be at least a couple days till I can reincorporate you."

"I know," she said sadly. Then a bit louder, she addressed the rest of the room, "I'm so sorry everyone! I know you probably wanna welcome me back. Maybe even throw a big party. And I want to see you too! But I'm so cold. I just want to be warm and fall asleep. We can see each other soon. Is that okay?"

He kissed her ear again. "None of them minds. Not a single one. They're just glad to know you're allright. Cassie's telling me they'll wait as long as you need. And Freddy said he missed your buck teeth."

Tracy couldn't stop a giggle at that.

"He looks quite proud of himself for getting a laugh out of you."

"I bet he does."

Nyl shifted his arms to get a steady grip on her. He stood up and the bench melted into the floor. He carried Tracy towards the restrooms, but made sure to take a few extra steps so she could look up into the big Christmas tree's branches.

She appreciated that. As they passed, she held her ornament towards the greenery.

Nyl nodded and levitated it to an empty branch. "That one gets a spot of honor. We'll make sure to remember which one's yours."

"Put it where it was when I first saw it," she said, grinning. "When I come back, I can jump and get it again."

"Will do," Nyl pledged.

There was absolutely nothing scary about the room of ashes anymore. The darkness inside was soothing. The silence a relief. Tracy saw little skulls on the floor and felt nothing but happy anticipation. 'Pretty soon, that'll be me!'

Nyl reached the center of the room, where the floor sloped down into a shallow pit. "Do you think you can stand?"

"I dunno," Tracy admitted. Nyl very, very carefully eased her down until her shoes met the scorched tile. Her feet were starting to feel like raw hamburger pincushions. Shooting pains raced up and down her shins. She was a bit wobbly and had to hold onto Nyl for a few moments at first, but then managed to stay up on her own. "I'm okay."

"Allright." He receded to disappear in the dusky smoke at the back of the room. "Just tell me when you're ready."

"Right now," Tracy said impatiently.

A chuckle from the fog. "Then let's get going. First things first, one undressed chipmunk."

Tracy did not think she had the energy required to even shake her coat off. But just as she reached for the zipper, someone else took it. "Oh!"

What happened next brought her back in time to her very first introduction, when her clothes had danced with her in a waltz. Now her pants lifted her into the air so her shoelaces could untie themselves and her socks could wriggle off like snakes. Her coat disgorged her arms and fluttered away. Her shirt held her aloft while her pants, pajamas and undies all removed themselves in that order. The shirt lowered her back to earth, then it and her pajama top took to the air like flapping birds. All that was left was her bracelet. It pulled her arm forwards, just as if someone were taking her hand to place a kiss upon it. Tracy tried her best to curtsy and not fall over. "Why thank you, sir! You make me feel like Cinderella."

She turned to watch her clothes go floating away for safekeeping. When she turned back, she was seemingly alone. "Nyl?"

"I'm still here. Just 'waking up' so to speak."

Tracy nodded. She fidgeted foot to foot. She stared into the inky fog. "That stuff's not, like, a big cloud of kid ash, is it?" And she'd walked right through it before. Blech.

"No, no," a soft laugh. "It's just a covering. Think of it as my dressing curtains." He made a sound like stretching. "Ahhhh. There we go. I'll be out in a second."

Tracy waited patiently, and soon saw movement within the black fog. Twitching. She watched in numbed fascination as a million red worms approached. Nerves. Snaking along the floor, the walls, and the ceiling. Uncountable tiny branches. She looked deeper into the mist. She gasped when she saw the shape approaching.

Nyl had untethered himself from the wall. A man made of squirming nerves was walking towards her, and spreading out his ten-foot wingspan until it scraped the sides of the room.

She was so startled she tripped, but his protrusions lashed forward and caught her in the blink of an eye.

"I won't let anything bad happen to you."

The voice came from everywhere and nowhere in the room. Nyl's face was still a featureless knob of tangled red licorice. His nerves spiraled around her wrists and ankles. Very gentle, but still making her shiver. Of course, being naked and frostbitten also contributed. Tracy looked down to the bits of Nyl writhing around her feet and noticed that several of her toes had turned dark at the tips. Her fingers too. She wondered if her nose was also affected. She couldn't feel it either.

But really, that was okay. She was here now. She didn't need this body anymore. Nyl's unorthodox arms caressed up and down her sides. Gliding across her fur like skiers through snow. She closed her eyes and let herself relax completely as they traced her every shape. When she felt her legs give out, there was barely a jostle before the nerves were supporting her. They placed her arms at her sides and her legs together. Standing her up straight like a candle.

"I told the truth when I said I couldn't make the pain any less," Nyl's voice spoke into her ears. "But they can."

Tracy was getting sleepy again and almost asked 'who'. But then she knew. She couldn't see them, hear them, or feel them. But she did not doubt they would be right there with her.

His faceless face leaned closer. Tracy was being so good, so still. Such a brave girl. "I hate to cause you any more pain after all you've already been through tonight."

She nodded. "It's okay. This'll be the last of it, right?"

"That's right, Tracy. This will be over soon."

She closed her eyes and braced herself.

It started slow. And at first it was very pleasant. A warmth began in her hands and feet, and grew. It spread into her fingers and toes, traveling up her limbs towards her core. She could feel it in her tail and her throat. After an icy night like tonight, this was more than bliss.

Tracy held onto that good feeling for as long as she could. Because the temperature was getting higher. Soon her hands felt like they were palms-down on a hot stove; her feet like she was walking through fire. She mumbled a little, but she was not about to let herself scream. This was what she'd wanted all this time. This was Nyl's gift to her, as much as it was her gift to him. She had to see this through. Her fourth devotion.

"You're doing so good," his voice spoke to her. Calming as a splash of cool water.

But the heat was consuming her now. It went from sunshine at the peak of summer to feeling like she was locked inside a steel crate on that same day. She began to cry, and soon the tears were boiling on her cheeks. Each breath felt like she was drinking burning gasoline. She bit her gums to keep from shouting. She would be a good girl! She would endure this!

But no amount of willpower can change the fact that when a body is being incinerated from the inside out, the soul within cannot help but scream. Poor Tracy held on as long as she could, but soon her mouth was wide and wailing. Shrieking his name. Crying out to make the pain stop.

"VANDYKE!!! VANDYKE!!! VANDYKE!!!"

"I'm so, so sorry, Tracy," he spoke directly into her mind. "I can't stop it once it's started. But it will all be over soon. I am so proud of you. I love you so much."

She could barely process the meaning of what he said. The pain was obliterating her, blotting out everything but itself. Destroying her down to the molecule. The air was full of thick, charred smoke. Her own body going up in flames. Invisible, internal flames of divine fire. Nyl was roasting her alive. Baking her in an oven of her own skin. She screamed and thick churning smoke clouds rolled out of her mouth and eyes.

Just when she thought she would rather be wiped from existence than endure a single second more, she became aware of a hand upon her shoulder. Then another.

Her eyes were still sealed shut by agony, but she felt little paws take hold of her. Squeezing soft. Doing their best to comfort her. And the pain began to ease. Just as Nyl had said. The sensation was still there, and yet it began to matter less. It was just another feeling among many. Still intense, but increasingly, bearable.

Tracy was able to breathe again. With every exhale, she was giving up more of her essence to Nyl. The smoke traveled from her burning body into his. He pulled her in through a seemingly endless inhale. Changing her to smoke and drawing her in with his breath. Dragging on a chipmunk cigarette.

Her eyes struggled open. At first all she could see was flickering, dancing grey. The smoke. Her smoke. Her burning body. The nerves were all around her in a web, head to toe. Her fur had carbonized to dust. Her skin was glowing red like molten metal. She watched her body disintegrate into particles of ash. She watched her guardian angel consuming her.

And other eyes were looking back at hers. Worried, concerned, loving faces crowded around her. There were voices drifting to her that said such tender, caring things.

"We're so glad you came back."

"I missed you every day."

"I love you, Tracy. We all do."

"It'll be over soon, don't worry."

"We'll wait right here for you. Take all the time you need."

"Get some rest."

"We love you."

Voices and faces in the furnace. Her body was turning from red to white hot. Bright as a lightbulb. Even through the stinging glow Tracy could see their faces. One, two, three... Was someone missing? Tracy was confused. She could make out most of her friends, but some of them were gone. There was Violet and Tybalt and Eleanor. Freddy, and what must have been Kevin beside him. And there were two Cassies. No, wait. One of them was a boy. 'That must be her brother she mentioned.' Tracy was happy they were back together.

Her pain had been transformed. It still raged as powerful as ever, but she was floating on top of it now. Coasting. The fire burned inside and destroyed her into ash, and that was okay. It was nice. She was giving herself to Nyl. She watched misty tendrils of herself float across the room and enter his body. That's where all of her would be soon. Like shooting up a chimney. The image made her smile. She pictured herself as a little burning yule log.

Seeing Tracy smile, the others did too. The little chipmunk felt kisses on her cheeks. A paw stroked her shoulders. Another, her tail. All sorts of gentle, pleasing touches. She cried out softly. Not a scream anymore. A soft coo. Begging for them to continue. For the fire to consume her fully, and for her friends to help her along.

"Almost there, my sweetheart," Nyl told her. "Almost time for bed."

Tracy thought that sounded perfect. Snuggling up inside her angel to sleep all night and day? Fantastic. Maybe a few days. Heck, why not a week? She felt like she hadn't truly slept a single night since she'd been taken to the hospital. But no one could stop her now. She was standing in the fire. The fire was inside. No one could pull her away from it. Her body was already too far gone to be caught again.

Pain became joy. Tracy cried happy tears that vaporized instantly. Her skin changed again from heat-white to charcoal dark. Every movement sent flakes of soot falling. She was an overdone marshmallow. Time to eat her before she got too gooey and fell off the stick. Tracy giggled. Her friends hugged and kissed her. The fire sped her along to where she wanted to be. She was burning. A bright little sun to warm her favorite angel.

"Goodbye."

"See you soon."

"We love you."

Tracy felt the last shards of her structure fall away. Her brittle skin cracked, splintered, and turned to dust. The skeleton underneath held stable for a moment longer, then came tumbling down with the sound of a scattering bamboo necklace. Her little skull bounced and rolled next to Saffron's. The remaining dust swirled and flowed towards its inevitable destination. Tracy murmured in happiness and rode along with the flowing embers. Traveling into love. Inside Nyl. Inhaled. Consumed. Safe at last.

The other cubs hugged themselves close to Nyl and watched as the last grey swirls of Tracy vanished inside of him.

Then it was dark. A deep burgundy red all around with no details to make out. Tracy was descending down a long elevator with a heartbeat. Still incorporeal. Still just a happy puff of soot. Content to simply waft along wherever Nyl would place her. She trusted him.

Soon there was light. Flickering like candles. Tracy emerged into a cathedral. A huge room, spiraling around and around within itself like a möbius strip. The walls were a welcoming pink. Her vision was hazy, but she could tell the little candles were in lined-up rows of recessed divots along the walls.

Except they weren't candles. How silly of her. They were souls. Dozens and dozens. As Tracy floated closer, she could see sleeping faces. Little cubs smiling in their dreams. Whatever force was moving her forward knew just where to take her, because Tracy squeaked in happiness to draw nearer to a sleeping skunkette and leopard.

She was nestled into the crevasse between the two. A spot picked out just for her. She settled into her very own alveoli; snug as a sleeping bag.

Tracy was happy. Her vision began to dim, even though she and the other souls were luminous. She watched Bonnie's eyes move behind her eyelids, and Saffron's jaw twitch as if she was chewing on something. Tracy wondered what they were dreaming. She wondered if maybe she could join them there.

Though even if her future held nothing but blank, warm darkness, that was okay too.

She was really, really sleepy after all.

Tracy yawned. Then she was out like a light.

*~*~*~*





SEVEN MONTHS LATER

*~*~*~*



It was an absolutely spectacular August afternoon. The sun's sizzling heat poured down over everything like a fine sheen of honey, yet it was just on the right side of sweltering. Hot enough to want to get out and play in, but no so hot it left you plastered to your bed and begging for winter. Tracy was dripping with perspiration, dancing right on the edge of heatstroke, and her calves were about to blow out. But she loved it. Her radiant grin gave the sun competition. Running in winter was fun because you could balance the chill with body heat and find a nice equilibrium. But summer running was fun because it was just fun! There was so much more to see this time of year! Car dealerships all dressed up in pennants and balloons. Little kids scampering around blasting each other with squirt guns. Chatting couples nibbling at exotic meals on restaurant patios. A parade of colorful pedestrians, and an ocean of gleaming cars. Sometimes she'd even spot an old classic machine with a lotta chrome and those lipstick-shaped tailfins. The freeway to her left was a constant tidal roar. Oddly befitting the tropical, beach-feeling jam spilling out of her music player. She had SO many more playlists now, including ones for every type of weather. Today's was Cabana. Also she had to admit that fanny packs were a bit lame, but there really wasn't a better way to carry around your music when the only other things you were wearing were sneakers and socks.

Tracy swayed to the beat in her birthday suit. Bopping down the avenue, giving the whole world a look at her trim, toned tummy and pistoning legs. She even flashed her big silly buck teeth in a smile at everyone she passed. Sweat glistened on her auburn fur. Her eyes were wide and bright, taking in the bustling, vibrant, percussive panorama of the city.

It was about five blocks back to the mall, but she thought a little top-up couldn't hurt. Mostly she had been twirling and dodging past all the pedestrians she shared the sidewalk with, but up ahead was an older raccoon on a bike heading towards her. She parked herself in his path, legs akimbo, and let him run over her.

Or rather through her. Tracy's form rippled for a second, then she let out a satisfied 'Ahhhh,' like she'd just taken a nice big chug of cool lemonade. The raccoon fellow continued on as usual, but did feel a brief, not-unpleasant tickle in his belly region.

Fully-refreshed, Tracy switched songs to find one with an even peppier pace. Taking a drink from someone always made her hyper for a few moments! This was something she had discovered by complete happy accident last winter, as she was testing the limits of how far she could get from the mall before getting all woozy and insubstantial. She had stumbled against a living person and felt their energy nuzzle against hers like static electricity. And, on reflex, she tried some. In that moment, Tracy felt like she could run like greased lightning. Testing it, she found the limits of her perimeter had now doubled. And when she took a bigger sip from another passerby, it quadrupled. She understood the implications of this immediately and fell to the sidewalk on her knees crying tears of joy. Tracy had her run back.

Though not without risk. This was just as much a spacewalk as her January birthday (as she called it now). There was always the potential danger of being too far away from the mall and running out of living souls to pinball off of. She wasn't sure what she'd do when wintertime came again and there'd be fewer pedestrians out, but for right now, that problem was far in the future and miles from her mind.

Some of the other cubs experimented with taking jaunts away from the mall, but not even Saffron was bold enough to do it as often or for such long distances. With no corporeal body to hold her back, Tracy felt like she never had to stop. Fatigue was now a fully-corrected error. She was even planning, someday before the weather turned bad again, to see if she could run for 12 straight hours from sunup to sundown. The danger of it thrilled her (and worried Nyl considerably), but she couldn't resist. Running was what she was born to do. And letting go of her old life had not forced her to sacrifice it, but had granted her a whole new way to explore what she loved.

Now Tracy had found her role in the group. She was their courier. Every day, even in the rain, she tried to go someplace she'd never been before. Some new diner, or record shop, or yard sale. Just today she'd decided to take a peek in that all-you-can-eat sushi bar over by the main library. Like a frisky wind, she'd darted back and forth amongst the diners, touching everything on everyone's plates. Not that they noticed. Ghosts couldn't be seen, or spread germs. But what they could do was take that sense memory back to Nyl to make it a new part of the mall's ever-growing illusion. Plus, she'd thought to detour home today through the sporting goods outlet and touch a few airsoft guns and a buttload of BBs. Freddy and Kevin would go wild. Something new to blast heads off mannequins with.

Arriving at her destination, Tracy paused her music. The construction equipment drowned it out anyway. The Heaven Plaza mall was now a memory. Transformed by heavy machinery into a humongous hole in a vacant lot, plus several mountains of dirt, a brand new metal infrastructure, yards of timber and tubing, and about a mile of disposable 'keep out' fencing. The big shiny graphic on the Coming Soon! sign showed what the new Beech Township Collection would look like. A bit snootier than Tracy would have liked. But hey, they'd be getting a theater!

Tracy climbed up a backhoe and hopped the fence. Tybalt was tanning and gave her a wink and salute. Tracy blew him a kiss. Cassie and her brother Clyde were up on the biggest dirt pile making dirt castles. Clyde finished a turret and, needing a flag for the top, reached out his arm and picked up a hazard flag lying fourteen feet away. Violet was up at the tiptop of the new scaffolding, and Tracy watched as she swooshed down to earth in a lovely parabola.

By day the site was such a hive of activity and flux that it was difficult for Nyl to maintain more than a few illusory rooms at a time. That's why it appeared to Tracy that there was a lonely video game store right in the middle of the construction, with guys in hardhats and reflective vests walking right through where Freddy and Kevin (today in his fearsome Kevindrake form) were trying to knock each other off the road in a driving game. Eleanor was cheering them on at the top of her lungs over all the jackhammer noise. Looking higher up, Tracy could also see a tiny bedroom floating in the air: Saffron's alcove abode. The leopardess was flat on her back snoozing with her tail dangling over the side. All tired out from a long morning working on the punching bag that Tracy had brought her from a nearby gym.

A little nude skunk in a sun bonnet and sandals came running up to say hello. Bonnie was only marginally shorter than Tracy, but the chipmunk still felt powered-up enough to give her a short piggyback ride. That is, until they fell over in a giggling mess in a pool of freshly-poured concrete. Bonnie decided to stay a while, since it was cool and thick and mucky like a mud bath. Tracy teased that she'd better get out again before it dried or else she'd be a permanent floor decoration. Bonnie said she was quite capable of teleporting away at any time. Tracy ruffled her fur, gave her a kiss, and headed on.

It had never actually been spoken between them, but Tracy had noticed how Bonnie almost always popped up whenever she came home from her journeys. Making sure she wouldn't vanish again. Tracy couldn't blame her for that. After 'percolating' for a few days inside Nyl's soul-repository, Tracy had emerged as a freshly-minted ghostmunk and learned what had happened in her absence. It had been as hard on all of them as it had been for her. They'd planned a big party, then waited and waited and waited all day for her to show. Then they waited Sunday. And Monday. 'Maybe she was busy over the weekend?' But a weekend became a week, and then longer. Everyone wondered where she'd gone. Tybalt tried his best to be a counselor for the others. Bonnie had a bit of a breakdown, unable to make herself believe that she wasn't responsible somehow for Tracy going away. Elly tried to help her, but soon realized that the only thing that could ease her friend's mind was a long rest. Nyl accommodated her. Then Saffron decided to go inside him two days later. Tracy's absence was something she could not fix, no matter what she did, and the frustration was driving her into a simmering rage. Nyl felt the loss of Tracy more than any of them, and his heart felt sure that he was responsible for this. He had scared her away. And he didn't know if that was for the worse or better. At least it helped the others cope when Clyde woke up and rejoined them. Just as sunny as his sister, the cubs now had two full-time morale officer mice.

Everything changed when Tracy returned. After a lovely little 58-hour nap, she had woken up in Nyl's catacombs and instinctively knew the way out. As her smoky spirit floated away from its alcove, she reached back to shake Bonnie and Saffron awake too. The little skunk stared, dumbstruck, afraid she might still be dreaming. Saffron bit at the paw that jostled her, but then opened her eyes and lit up with joy. Soon a luminous seam appeared from within Nyl's corporeal form and three happy cubs crawled out. They were inundated with hugs, kisses, and tears. The family partied so hard that night, the moon probably heard them.

In the here and now, when the construction crew packed it in and went home each day, the lot went quiet and the illusion returned in full. Now Nyl could bring it all back. The fountain and tower, their bedrooms, the food court, the escalators, the huge movie screen, the stores, the food, the lights, and the tree. Tracy tried to think of what she had planned for tonight. Tybalt had been teaching her how to box lately. Or maybe a few laps around the underside of the skylights if Saffron got herself woken up. There was a new DVD she'd brought in for Eleanor that the giraffette was dying to see with everyone together. Maybe cake decorating (and dive-bombing) with Freddy. Maybe curl up beside Bonnie in her bedroom for some reading. Maybe even just take some time by herself to go through a few more albums in the music store. It had been months and she still wasn't even 1/4th through. Bliss.

Or maybe she didn't want to be alone. Maybe she wanted something close and warm and naughty. Over the past few months, many eye-opening secrets had been revealed. Things that made her ornament-yiffing look tame in comparison. So maybe a game of Twister, or Baby The Babysitter, or Hide & Pee? Maybe ask Violet to be her sleeping bag. Or do some pouncing with Saffron in the trampoline room. Get close in the dance studio with Tybalt. Be the meat in a Cassie & Clyde sandwich. Or Kevin & Freddy? Maybe give a kiss under Bonnie's tail? Or under Eleanor's to drive Bonnie wild!

The choices were endless, and they were all exciting.

And maybe she could spend some time right now with a certain favorite foxy angel.

Nyl was sitting cross-legged on a beach towel next to a pitcher of lemonade. Eyes closed, looking wholly at peace despite all the bulldozing right behind him. He was seated on that one spot in the mall where a whole bunch of little skulls had lain, yet everyone involved just seemed not to look too close there. In fact, by some silly coincidence, they'd laid a slab over that square first thing as construction began. And no one ever thought of it again. Tracy didn't mind her remains being buried (even though it had been kind of spooky-cool to pick up and examine her own headbone from time to time). At least now there was no worry that Nyl's true body would ever be found. It was hanging out, cozy and cool, in a little oubliette he'd hollowed out. Accessible but unseen. While the new mall was being completed, he was sure he could find as many ways as he needed to keep people looking away.

Tracy jogged over to him. She waved, but he didn't react. So then she went into stealth mode with a grin on her face. Backing up, she raised her tail and booped his nose with a buttcheek.

Nyl spoke up quite nonchalantly. "Good afternoon, Tracy. I could see you the entire time, you know." She gave a cute yelp when he playfully gnashed his teeth at her tail. "Rawr! So, how was your mission today?"

"It was excellent!" She got down on her knees beside him and leaned in for a big squeeze. He turned to rest his angled muzzle on her shoulder, and she shivered in delight as he inhaled her memories. Tracy did her best to recall all the new things she'd touched today. How they looked and smelled too: the more details the better. This was not as intense a process as having an emotion eaten, but she got to do it almost every day, so that balanced out.

Nyl licked his lips. "I haven't had sushi in a long time. Good choice!"

She beamed proudly. "Thanks!"

Nyl noticed something else in the inventory. "BB guns?" He rolled his eyes. "Sure, because there's not already too much noise around here." He caught her with one hand and savagely tickled her bare tummy with the other.

Tracy whooped and managed to squirm away. She swished behind him and leaned down, resting her folded arms on top of his ears. "Can't catch me. I'm too fast."

He looked up. "You certainly are."

Tracy smiled, perfectly content in that moment. Just seeing the happiness in his eyes.

Nyl was absolutely happy. Not just with the beautiful weather and a cuddly chipmunk perched on his head. But to have his whole family all together, riding this new change in their lives and making the best of it. Whatever the new mall would look like on the inside, they would customize it their way. Mixing the old with the new and making it theirs. And he had plans this time. This new mall would not be closing down due to mysterious disappearances. He knew he was rooted to the spot by his condition, but now he had a way to reach beyond himself. Even though he hoped for a world where no more cubs would ever need his rescue, if he sensed them, he was no longer limited. He now had a runner. A herald.

Tracy was unaware of his plans. Nyl would keep them secret until he was sure they would work (and if they were safe, and if they would even be needed). For now she was just grinning and squishing handfuls of his eartufts between her fingers. Also enjoying his luxuriant tail pressed between her belly and his back.

But then a movement on the other side of the construction site caught her eye. She stood up sharply.

Nyl turned around, alarmed. "Tracy?"

She pointed. "That poor guy! He's gonna-" But then a furry flying carpet came soaring in to save the day. Tracy smiled in relief. "Never mind! Violet's got it."



*~*~*~*



A few moments later, a shaken bear descended his ladder and whapped his buddy on the arm. "Christ on a cracker, Rich! Didja see that!?"

The buff mouse looked around. "See what?"

"I was up on the dang ladder when I lost my balance! Thought I was gonna fall off 'n wreck my spine all to hell. Then outta nowhere it was like something gave me a shove forwards. Like an elbow at my back. Just like that, I was stable again." He looked up at where he'd almost fallen from. "Whoo shit! The guys've been sayin' this job's haunted. If so, I'm goddamn glad for it!"

Richard laughed and went back to hauling cement sacks. "It was the wind, you meathead!"



   The End
   for now...







***

AUTHOR'S NOTE

This story is not a metaphor for suicide. Not, not, NOT a metaphor for suicide. I wanted to make that clear, because I can easily see how it could be taken that way.

To be as explicit as I can, this is a story about knowing what your heart wants, and having the courage to leave behind people and places who are holding you back from it. Sometimes we have to face a bit of pain to get where we want to be. It's worth it though. And until any of us have proof of an afterlife, this one is all we know we have. So stay here a while. But nothing says you have to stay in one spot.

I've had elements of this story floating around in my head for a very long while back, and seemingly out of nowhere they all spun themselves together and demanded I write about them. A character I drew for a single picture who felt like she deserved more. My nostalgia for the mall that always seemed like a magic place when I was young. The lonely feel of walking late at night in the cold. A Stephen King villain that I wondered what they'd be like if they were nice instead. And a short story I read once with an ending so wrong I've always wanted to rebut it.

I should also mention that (this is true), I went out for my daily exercise a few days ago, and right in front of my house, in the grass, I found a small piece of a broken gold Christmas ornament. I don't know what to make of that.

Once again, super-enormo-thanks go to my troupe of proofreaders. A narrating bunny. A fox, cat, and squirrel trio of voice actors. Plus a proofreading pup. You guys are awesome. :3

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