//------------------------------//
//  Torch teaches Anon how to not suck at League and sex happens or something - Part 1// Story: And the Rest is (Browsing) History// by Wuten//------------------------------//


Part 1



	“He’s pushing top…”
	“I know, I’m going!”
	“…You’re gonna miss him…”
	“Am not! Just let me focus!”
	Torch is a terrible back-seat gamer.
	She gets like this every time you end up playing League! You’re in a lower bracket than her, so you’re facing against easier players, but you yourself are a bit… iffy, when it comes to your own skill at the game.
	“He’s heading into the jungle; get him before he steals our buffs!”
	“Damn it Torch, I have him! Will you stop?”
	Aaaaaand, you lost him. Again.
	“Damn Anon, you just don’t know how to hunt them down, huh?” she chuckles, walking over to the fridge to grab another bottle of Mountain Dew. “Now he’s probably going to wreck your shit next time you see him.”
	Sighing, you press “B” to cast your Recall spell. Might as well restore your health and be ready for him next time…
	“So Anon, you hear about that gaming tournament that they’re holding downtown?” she asks, leaning up against the desk next to you, taking a big gulp of her fizzy drink. “The one EVERYONE’S gonna be at?”
	“No Torch, we’re not entering that tournament.”
	“But why not?” she asks, groaning. “You’ve barred me from entering for two years now! How long are you gonna keep me from joining competitively, huh?”
	“We’ve been over this, Torch. You know why I won’t let you join competitively; you get way too vocal in-game and would get us kicked out easily. There are kids that watch the tournament live, y’know. They don’t need to be hearing a pony letting loose every swear word in the dictionary every time her teammate feeds the other team first blood.” You’ve learned a little bit more of the terms used in the game in your time with Torch. Still learning, but better than nothing, right?
	“That’s a faggot excuse, Anon. Tons of kids go swearing off at everything nowadays. You ever hear of those Cock of Doody bitches? Don’t think I’ve heard so many voice-changers and lack of balls-dropped in all my life here,” she grunts, taking another sip of her drink.
	She’s really not going to let this go, is she? Hm…
	“Alright, Torch. We’ll enter the tournament.”
	Her eyes widen and she nearly does a spit take with her drink. “WHAT?!” She turns to look at you, hugging you tightly. “You’re serious?! Oh man, thanks so much Anon!”
	“…On one condition.”
	She pauses, looking up at you. Then a grin spreads across her face. “Oh… so it’s gonna be like that, is it Anon?” she winks up at you, before hopping off and turning around, whipping her tail back and forth, just barely giving you glimpses of those plump, juicy lips of her love-hole.
	“Not quite, Torch.”
	She raises an eyebrow.
	“We’ll join… but I’m competing.”
	You can see the hope leave her eyes for a split moment, before returning once again, a mischievous grin spreading across her face.
	“Alright Anon, we’ll play your game… but we’re playing my way.” She turns back to you, hopping onto your lap again. “You’d better be ready, because by the time I’m done with you, your beta ass is gonna be the best fucking League player in the state.”
	Oh… Looks like it’s going to be one of THOSE weekends…
	
	"Torch?"
	“Faggot, don't talk to me! Concentrate on the match!" she grunts from the other side of the room at the table, setting down a slice of pizza. She’s been drilling you in this damn game for the past three days; you’ve only gotten five hours of sleep collectively…
	"W-well, I did something you won't like..."
	“Oh for fucks sakes if you..." She stands up from the table and walks over to you. Her glare intensifies when she watches your character die on-screen. “YOU SON OF A BITCH, YOU DIED FROM A GANK?!" 
	"I didn't see him!"
	“You have a ward in tri! He came from tri!" She’s practically screaming in your ear now, pointing at the bush just above the southern tower.
	"I wasn't paying attention..."
	She gets down, before letting out a heavy sigh. "Good, you know what you did wrong. Now learn from it you dumb shit!" she grunts, punching your shoulder with a hoof before walking away.
	"Fine..."
	“And last hit better."
	"What's last hitting?"
	Torch sighs before walking back over, pushing you away from the desk, and slamming her face into the keyboard. "I'M HURTING MYSELF BECAUSE YOU'RE SO GOD DAMN STUPID!"
	You didn’t ask for this…
	
	“Alright, so what do you feel like you’re best at?” she asks after the game finishes.
	You’ve had a fairly good run lately, mostly running top and jungle…
	“I’m thinking jungling is where I’m good at. I think I’ve got a pretty good system down for it…”
	“Alright. Next up, we need to pick your champion. Here, I’ll pull up the list they have,” she says, hopping into your lap and taking over the keyboard and mouse, opening up the champion list for you. “Here ya go.”
	"Hm… How's Nasus?"
	“Hit and Miss for obvious reasons. Don't take him into competitive play."
	"Nocturne?"
	“You're too retarded."
	"Maokai?"
	“If your teammates aren't retarded, yeah."
	"How about Jax?"
	“...Meh."
	"Jesus... what about Lee Sin?"
	“If you used him and failed I'd have to kill you. I love that blind troll."
	"Wait... what about Trundle?"
	“Trundle is... well... he's... you know what, fuck it. You're so bad you might as well cover it up as trolling anyway. Trundle it is."
	"Wait... what about…”
	One of the champions stands out to you more than the others…
	“…Master Yi...?"
	Torch sighs. "Yi's the guy you use if you know the enemy is a bunch of fuck ups.” She opens up the champion page for Yi, showing you his abilities and stats. “His abilities are based off of AP, but if you build AP in the jungle you slow Yi down because his auto attacks do less damage and you're stuck relying on his Q for clear time. So, you're forced to build AD.”
	She exits out of the page. “If you go in and attack you have to stay next to them; if you get too hurt and try to heal, it won't be significant. If you try to attack him, he might be too tanky. You NEED your team to be on their A-game if you want to use him."
	Something about him just calls to you, though…
	"Well, this tournament is gonna bring in the best players in town, Torch. I like how Yi looks and his abilities look like fun. Jungler Yi it is!"
	“...I swear to god if you fuck this up you won't get to fuck my ass for a month."
	…Not fair.
	
	After you play a few games with Yi, you feel like you have a good grasp of him. Even got a pretty good kill-death ratio, only died six times through the whole game.
	“Alright. With this build, you’re an assassin, Anon,” she says after adjusting some of your runes, spells and masteries around. “You die fast but you can kill enemies fast as well. Your goal is to deal as much damage as you can possibly do. In order to do that, you can’t up and die because... well, you can't attack when you're dead.”
	“Got it.”
	“No, you don’t. PLAY IT AGAIN AND DON’T DIE THIS TIME YOU FUCKING NOOBLORD!”
	“But I thought I did pretty good in that game…?”
	“Please. When you don’t run blindly into Fiddlestick’s AoE attack, then come talk to me…”
	It was ONE time. ONE FUCKING TIME…
	
	“Hey, Anon?”
	“Yeah?”
	“…Thanks for entering,” you hear her say as you finish what could very well be your seventeenth game today; you’ve lost count, they sort of blend together when you get little to no sleep at all…
	“Wha…?”
	She walks over and stands on her hind legs, leaning her back against the desk. “Thanks for entering the tournament. I might not be playing, but,” she grins at you, “I’ll be playing through you. Taught you the ropes this weekend, and you’ll be ready for the tournament tomorrow, y’know?”
	Heh. Guess she’s right in that regard…
	“Yeah, no prob…” Your eyes begin to drop, you haven’t gotten any sleep at all… and your bed’s all the way across the apartment…
	Torch chuckles, getting back down on all fours. “C’mon, Anon. You look like a fucking wreck,” she says, grinning at you. “Hop on; I’ll take ya to your bedroom.”
	Wait… what?
	“Wha…?” Your sleep deprivation must be getting to you; you could’ve sworn that Torch just offered to carry you to your bed…?
	“The fuck are you staring at me like that for, Anon?” she raises an eyebrow at you, “You may be a fucking beta faggot, but even I can tell when you can’t even function properly. Now get the fuck on my back,” she grunts.
	Well, no sense in arguing the promise of sweet relief of lying on a comfortable mattress instead of sitting and falling asleep in the chair, right?
	“…Alright…”
	She nods, and you slowly crawl onto her back, your bare feet dragging against the carpet as she makes her way through the apartment, pushing your bedroom door open with an audible creaking noise.
	“Damn Anon, you’re fucking heavy…” she grunts, walking up to the bed.
	“Heh… you sure it’s not just you?” Picking yourself up, you immediately fall onto the bed face-first, relishing the feeling of the pillows against your head. You would have fallen asleep right then and there, but then you felt another shifting of weight on the bed.
	“…Torch?” Your voice is muffled, but she hears it nonetheless.
	“Yeah?”
	You turn your head to look at her. “What’re you doing?”
	She sighs. “Believe it or not, this bed is a lot more comfortable than the floor next to it, y’know.”
	Shrugging, you let it slide. S’just one night, right?
	Rolling over onto your back, you put your hands behind your head, relaxing. “Hey, Torch?”
	“Yeah?”
	You place a hand on her head, scratching it. “We’re gonna blow away all the competition tomorrow. You hear?”
	She turns around and grins at you with those fiery orange eyes. “Wouldn’t have it any other way.”
	Silence follows, and her gaze looks away from you. “Hey, Anon?”
	“Yeah?”
	“Do ya think we could… um…?”
	She’s hesitating? What?
	She looks like she’s conflicted on what she wants to say…?
	“We could… what?”
	She shakes her head, rolling over to face the other side of the wall. “Nothing. Nevermind,” she grunts, not saying another word on the matter. Sighing, you close your eyes, letting sleep take you…
	As you enter your trance-like state of dreaming, however, you can’t help but notice a warm presence begin to envelop your side, a bit of pressure on your right arm, and the feeling of hot air along your hand in a steady rhythm…



	End Part 1